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GALOMEL IS MERGUI . t t STOP USI Don't Lose a Day's Work! IfN Constipated Take "Dodsor You're bilious! Your liver is slug gish! You, feel lazy, dizzy and all knocked out. Your head is dull, your 1tongue is coated; breath bad; stomach soty and bowels constipated. But don't taktealivating calomel. It makes you sick, you may lose a day's work. Calhmel is mercury or quicksilver which. causes necrosis..of the bones. Calomel crashes Into sour bile like dynamite, breaking It up. That's when you feel that awful nausea and cramp ing. If you want to enjoy the nicest, gen tlest liver and bowel cleansing you ever experienced just take a spoonful of harmless Dodson's Liver Tone. Your druggist or dealer sells you a 50-cent bottle of Dodson's Liver Tone under y personal money-back guarantee at each spoonful will clean your THE LAUGH ON HIMSELF Got Away With the Oatmeal and Also Succeeded in Saving Precious Whisky. F. Hartz of Detroit, the doyen of e American Surgical Trade associa on, said at the fiftieth annual con ention in New York: "The war has kited the price of car bolic acid up to $1.65 a pound-it sold before the war at 9 cents a pound. The hospitals that use carbolic acid now have to be as economical and sparing as old Josh Lee. "Old Josh Lee was a miser, and he breakfasted every morning on oat meal. To save fuel he cooked his week's supply of oatmeal on Sundays. This supply, by the time Saturday came around, was pretty stiff and tough and hard to down. "One Saturday morning old Josh found his oatmeal particularly unap petizing. It had a crust on it like Iron. He took a mouthful of the cold, stiff mixture-then he half rose, think ing he'd have to cook himself some eggs. "" ,, ,o n,. " -1e hated he took i a gen fore his oatmeal if you -onsume, whisky, he last - ..... d broad ly, poured the whisky back into the bottle again, and said: "'Josh, my son, I fooled you that time, you old idiot!'" - Washington Star. Good Address. Joseph W. Widener, the millionaire sportsman, was talking in Newport about homes. "Philadelphia is the city of homes," he said, "but if your home is north of Market street you ar'e conlsiderIed, socially speaking, out of It. Your home must be south of Market street --you must live downtown-if you would be a social personalit-y in Phila delphia." "And yet, after' all," said an English man, "what dlifference dloes it make wvhere a man lives?" "it makes all the differ'ence in the world," said Mr'. WVidener. "A fact that is well rmmnber'ed about Di ogenes todlay is that he lived in a tub," The National jibraryv in Paris coni talns the oldlest manp of the heavens, m nade inI Cina G 00 13. C. and showing 1.# s(otars. fi' To be continually well, calls for food that contains elements that surely build up the whole system body, nerves and brain, Grape-Nuts -made from whole wheat and malted barley-con tains the full nutriment of the grain, including the mineral salts, so essential to balanced re-building. Grape-Nuts, partially predigested, agrees splend idly with child or adult. Requires little work from the digestive organs and is quickly absorbed by the System, generally in about one hour. Thousands have found a helping hand in Grape Nute food "There's a Reason" Sold by Groc.ars. IIT SICKENSI NO SAI.IVATING DRUG our Liver Is Sluggish or Bowels i's Liver Tone."-It's Fine! sluggish liver better than a dose of nasty calomel and that it won't make you sick. Dodson's Liver Tone is real liver medicine. You'll know it next morn. ing because you will wake up feeling fine, your liver will be working, your headache and dizziness gone, your stomach will be sweet and your bowels regular. You will feel like working; you'll be cheerful; full of vigor and ambition. Dodson's Liver Tone is entirely vegetable, thdrefore harmless and can not salivate. Give it to your children! Millions of people are using Dodson's l'iver Tone instead of dangerous cal. omel now. Your druggist will tell you that the sale of calomel is almost stopped entirely here. A close friend is one who won't lend you money. To stop bleeding use Hanford's Bal sam. Adv. A catalogue of the fishes of Maine shows that the state has 140 species, but only 25 are fit to eat, and only 17 are of commercial value. Officer, Where Are You? "Has the backward season arrested the cotton crop?" we asked the South ern planter. "It has," he replied, "but we think we will be able to bale it out." ItEMARRABLW LETTER FROM A WELL KNOWN W.\SHINGTON DICUOOIST. in reference to Elixir liabekthe greatremedy for chilli and fever and all malarial diseases. "Within the last live months I have sold 8,600 bottlesof ElixirBabekforMalaria,Chillsand "ever. Onr customers speak very welt of it, Henry Eva ns. 92'3 F St., N.w.,washington, D.C." Elixir nlabek 50 cents all druggists, or by Parcels Post, prepaid, from Kloczewski & Co., Washington, D. C. Easy Money. "Any fishing up where you spent your vacation?" "Plenty. In fact, there wasn't any thing else. All we got to eat was the fish we caught ourselves, and they charged us $15 a week for serving it." For Burns and Scalds. In case of burns and scalds apply Hanford's Balsam of Myrrh and get relief. Apply it to cool the skin and take the fire out. Have a bottle al ways on hand to use in case of acci dents. Adv. Free Information. "I ain't had no work ter do in more'n two year, mum." "Poor man. How have you man aged to live?" "People have helped me, mum." "And so will I. Walk down this road half a mile and you will come to our county seat, where there is a model jail that serves better meals than t'ny country hotel in this part of the state."-Kansas City Star. DISTRESSING PIMPLES Removed by Cutlcura Soap and Olnt rment. Trial Free. Smear them with the Ointment. Wash off in five minutes with Cuti cura Soap and hot wvater tynd continue bathing for somo minutes. Repeat on rising andl retiring. These fragrant supercr'eamy emollients do much for the skin, and do it quickly. Sample each free by mail with Book. Address postcard, Cuticura, Dept. XY, Doston. Sold everywher.-Ady. Two Classes. "That jitney gave you a mighty hard bump." "I should say so. I have been laid up for' two weekrs." "Good thing you carry accidlent in surance." "Yes, but it dlocsn't get me anything in this case." "I should like to know why not?" "I culdseein the chauffeur'sey tha hs httngme wvas not going to be an accident." LongIngs. A well-known essayist and connois scur' of New York attended recently an artistic tea in Washington square. Near-artists of all sorts--near-poets, near-sculptors, neal--painters and near novelists-attendled the tea. The ladies Iwore djiblbahis of green burlap. The gentlemen wore aandals. The collation was vegetarihm,'of course. Looking calmly at ' that mass of freaks, he said, with a smile: "Artistic longings consist invariably, it seems, of long hair, long teeth and long faces--everything but long purses, in fact." PreparIng. In one of the southern states the negroes are great patrone of a nmatri monial agency. One dlarkey, anxious to find a wife for his son, want to this agent, who handed him his list of lady clients. Running through this the mant came upon his own wife's name, entered as dlesirous of obtaIn ing a husband between the ages of twenty-eight and thirty. Forgetting about his son, the darky hurried home to announce his discov ery to his wife. Sihe was not at all (lIsturi bed. "Y'es," she said, "I done gIve him my name. I puts it down whent you was so sick in do winter and (Ie doctor says we muist, prep~are for do worst." Chicago Jonal.n FABI IN THE NEW FABLE OF THE DIVINE SPARK THAT HAD A SHORT CIRCUIT. One Evening at a converted Rink Known as the Grand Opera House, a flock of intrepid Amateurs put on a War Drama. Lila, principal Child of the Egg and Poultry King, played a Daughter of the Southland, and her Hair shaken out and Lamp Black on her Eye-Wink ers, so as to look like Maxine. All of her Relations and the other Members of the 'ocahontas Bridge Whist and Pleasure Club were In Front, and they gave her a Hand every time she stepped out from behind a Tree. She scored what is known in the lb sen Cult as a Knock-Out. At 11 P. M. she was up on a lone some Eminence, right between Sara Bernhardt and Julia Marlowe, waiting for a Telegram from C. F. to come on and tackle the Role that was too Heavy for Maude Adams. The proud Parents awoke next Morning to discover that Lady Mac beth was boarding with them. When she moved from one Room to another, the Portieres had to be spread the entire length of the Pole, so as to make Room for her head. A local Haberdasher, who had been plotting to surround her with a new Bungalow and a lot of Mission Furni ture, went to call as per Usual and found her away Up Stage, trying to look like Margaret Angelin in the Big Scene. She was too busy to Hold Hands, for she was mapping out a Career which terminated with an Electric Sign on Broadway and the Street jammed with up-town Limousines. So the Gents' Furnisher moved down the Street to a Brick House, the unmarried Inmates of which would begin burning Greek Fire and send ing up Balloons every time a Live One Slammed the Front Gate. Lila had the Bacillus Theatricus gnawing away in every part of her System. She could see the magnificent Play House crowded from Pit to Dome, just as the Producing Manager sees it every August when the Pipe is draw ing freely. She could hear the Leading Man in the Dress Suit say, as he pointed up Trying to Look LIke Margar the Marble Stairway, "Ahi, here comes the Countess Z/ika now." And then She would enter trippiingly, wearing $900O woth of spangled Rainment, whereupon the Vast Audience would stand uip and (lieer. Whilst, enijoying tils Trance shmo wore a Yellow Khnn and~l) 11 had her Meals sent to thei. Itoom. Father saw that lhe was hlooked, so ho loadled her into( a Parlor Car and took her up to a School of D~ramauic Art to have her- seatrchted for Talent. The ll'ad (rimap of this refluied Shake-D)own wathed her (10 the Scene in whlich Ophieliai goes Dotty and picks the imagitnary IHol lyhlocks, and when it was all over and Shuakeu.eare hadl beeni redued i to a Pulp, he slaipped old Ready Mloney on the Back and told himi his I Iautghter was a Phenom. 'With a coup to of hiunidred Lessons in Correct I r'atiniilg, andt the Vocal Chords loosene.d up with a Glove Stretcher, and a row of Scallops put on the Techiiqm, Mlary Anderson would be righlt back ini our midlst. So Lila got r-eady to till lie Vacancy caused by the ltetire'tt of Ellen Terry, while Papa wecnt back to the (ittlo Oflice in one0 cornter ot the Ware house and b.ean to sign Checks. ES y IGADE.~ ___e___n_ _ k [OA'r AOf it took many an Egg to have Lila properly Conservatoried. ' At last she came home With a Di plona showing that she was an Ac tress. After that she merely needed a Play and a Company and a lot of Scenery and a Manager and a Theater and the soft old Public buying of the Scalpers in order to realize her modest Ambi tion to become a Real Star. She took her Diploma and the Local Press Notices up to New York to see what she could get on them, and found 10,000 other incipient Modjeskas hit. ting the worn Trail that led from one Agency to another. Artistic Temperaments were more Abundant thaw Lamp Posts and get ting an Audience with a Big Gun was just as easy as Opening a Time-Lock with a Hat Pin. She had an offer at the Hippodrome to walk in front of an Elephant way ing a prop Palm, but she spurned it, because she was ready to do Desde mona at a Moment's Notice. As for the Laudatory Article writ ten by a would-be Wiflie Winter of the wild and woolly West, she couldn't find any one in the neighborhood of 42nd Street who had ever heard of the Tank Town in which her Folls were so Prominent. In order to get Experience, sac signed up with a No. 4l Company, play ing the Part of the deaf-and-duml Lady who crosses the Stage and re. moves the Tea Things early in the Second Act. When the Troupe went on tho Rocks at Mauch Chunk, Penna., the erstwhih Favorite of the Pocahontas Club fount herself sitting on a Trunk mnarked "Theater" standing off a Deputy Sher iff and waiting for an Answer to hei Wire. The First Old Woman, who remem bered Edwin Booth, came and sat be side her. ")o not be discouraged, Honey, said She. "Go right back and start al over, and possibly sometime Nex Year you will again have the blesses Privilege of going up a neglecte Alley twice a Day and changing you Clothes in a Barn. Any Girl wit your Looks and Family Connection can curl up in a Four-Poster at nigli and then saunter to the Bath over soft Rug in the Morning, but only throbbing Genius can make them Nt Jup ina a Cah n so wil o ar Slddn fr h fr ettAin 20 te Bit ofcenery5. u Ningh Jrups in aront Coac an sinto atascope." c s prael sa wil beuHard Sledding Scfo tfhe1r 15ary0 eriumbutsbthmer suges aren of yo ma GreasonPably cot in getting 20in we r ouEoars. y5, u nAn aroun Trin ronte tofgh nth< Lardsld nt the maeonte ofSeo Glang narrowly escaped beinig hit ir the I Ieadl with a tin Make-Up Box hurled from the rear of the Observai tin Car. Next (lay she had a strip of ROe ('arpit spread for the H aberdashei and1( wasI learning to Cook ini Papel Hiagsm. Whenever sho hears of a Good ihou comining to Town, she invites all of lie Friends to como out to the lhungalowv and Play Rhium on the Missioni Fo nitumre. MflRAL: The True Friend of liin manity is one who goes to the lione Trah-nt Benefit for Something aii lIIiwss all Evening. CURED OF PELLAGRA; WOMAN IS SO HAPPY Ratliff, Miss.---Ida Creel, of this place, Writes: "I am enjoying fine health, bet ter than I have in years. My weight is 116; when I began taking your treatment it was 98. I sure can praise your treat. ment; can eat anything I want and it don't seem to hurt me." There is no longer any doubt that pel lagra can be cured. Don't delay until it is too late. It is your duty to consult the resourceful Baughn. The symptoms-hands red like sunburn, skin peeling off, sore mouth, the lips, throat and tongue a flaming red, with much mucus and choking; indigestion and nausea, either diarrhoea or constipation. There is hope; get Baughn's big Free book on Pellagra and learn about the remedy for Pellagra that has at last beetn . found. Address American Compounding Co., box 2090, .Jasper, Ala., reneintbering money is refunded in any case where the remedy fails to cure.-Adv. CREDITED TO THE BOSTONESE Proverbs With Which Most Are Fa miliar Set Forth Clothed in New Language. If upon the initiative attempt suc cess eludles your efforts, repeat the operation ad infinitu t. It is an exceedingly lengthy byway that fails to produce some tangible evidence to prove that its natural ten dencies point to an apparent longing to execute a right angle. When the houtschold feline has tem porarily vacated the premraises, the small rodents will undoubtedly take advantage of her absence to partici pate it unseenly galbols comminen surate with the joyous occasion. The operation of convoying a beast of burden in the general direction of the trough containing atua destillata may prove to be ones of cotmparative ease, but the process of inducting the quadruped to partake of the contents thereof is often a matter of conjec ture, to be determinued only by the - avowed inclination of the animal in ' question.-Judge. Fine Scorn. - "Lady," said P'lodding Pete, "could you spare a hungry mtan a meal o' victuals?" "You go away from here or I'll t call my husband." "Is that there stoop-shouldered man plowin' corn in the next Held r your husband?" 1 "Yes, it is." S "I take back what I said. I've got t a heart in me, I have. If you've got a a meal o' victuals for a poor starvin' a man, give it to your husband.'' We hear of new uses of Hanford's D3alsam of Myrrh. In dehorning cat tle, light applications help to stop bleeding, making the use of a hot iron unnecessary. Adv. In ite sixteenth century dictionaries were chained in the schoo! houses, as Bibles wvere In the ('hurchies, by t'ea son of their' costliness andl rau'ity. F'or mosquito bites apply Hanford's Dlalsam. Adv. Boxintg is taught in te state schtools of Australia. Children CryI The Kind You IHave Always .I in use for over 80 years, lo an 1 .All Counterfeits, Im itat ions a Experimecnts that triflic with~ Infants and Olldiren-Expci What is C) Castoria is a harmnless substi goric, Drops and Soothing 5 contains neither Opium, Mc substance. Its age is its gua and allays Feverishness. Fc has been In constant use for Fiatulency, Winid Colic, all Diarrhoea. It regulates t assimilates the Food, giving OENUUNE CAST Bears the E In Use For 0' The Kind You Has MOON SHlNE "Sweeter than Chiker." Mades by BAILFY I uttmunut~LADIES .! - USE GILBERT'S JEWEL TALCUM POWDER The Talcum of Quality, for refined people; Perfume rich, lasting, and ex quisite; Powder of velvety flueness. I Class Jars-So. and 25c. Sold by all dealers. MADE BY GILBERT BROS., & CO. BALTIMORE, MD. unnmtnituntiutunnimamimutma ittitalitiminuntulltm DNTE Men to learn barber trade. Few weeks required. Steady position for coi etent graduates. Wonderful demand for bar era. W ages whilie learning; free catalog; write ICHMOND BARBER COLLEGE, Richmond. Va. PECIAL PRICES Strai o' Wlral * Iona. ho greatest egg laying strainlfu America. 1l'nttiicaily bred on largest and best equippe ouitry Faru South of Mason and Dixon lino. 1h"s train yomu will ovontually buy.' '1'1111 WARRlNN .J'L RtY FARM, T. M. Blost, owner, W18U, NO. Cool Request. "Would you be kind enough to re urn ily photograph?" she wrote. "I ave it to you in a moment of girlish oily. and I have sirnce had occasion to egret that I was so thoughtless in such matters." Of course she pictured that photo raph framed and hung up in his oom, and was inclined to think that ie would part from it with deep re ret. lust why she wanted it returned s immaterial. Of course, he had of 'ended her in some way, and she vished to test his love, but it is un iecessary to inquire how. The answer to her note caime the ollowing (lay. "I regret," it read, "that I am un thie at this late date to pick out your ihotograph. lowever, I send you my nitire collection, numbering a little )ver 500, and would request that you 'etui'n all except your own by passel ;er train at miy expense." [o Drive Out Malaria And Build Up The System 'aga the Old Standard GROVE'S L'ASTELESS chill lONIC Yotu know vhat you are taking, as she formula is irinted on every label. showing it is ,)tntini and iron in a tasteless iorm. The Jutnine :rives out malaria, the Iron )tlids op the system. $0 cents. Adv. Office Chatter. "flow do you like your job?" asked lie inkwell. "It's dirty work:," replied the new Blotter. "Still it's rather absorbing." You can safely place faith in Han. ford's 1Balsam of Myrrh. Adv. The first balloon ascension took place in 1 s.i. PREVEN TION better than cure. Tutt's Pills if taken in time are not only a remedy for, but will prevent SICK HEADACHE, biliousness, constipation and kindred diseases. Tuft's _Pills TRY THE OLD RELIABLE WCHWLLTONC For MA LARIA CistLB A FINE GENERALa STRENGTHENING TONIC W. N. U., CHARLOTTE, NO. 34--1915. ror Fletcher's ought, and which has been lias borne the signature of a been made Under his per-s upervision since its infancy. to one to deceive you in this. nd " Just-as-good " are but ind endaniger the health of lence against Experknent. STOR IA tuito for Castor Oil, Pare.s yrups. It is pleasant. ig rIphino nor other .Narcotte rantee. It destroys Worms r more tihan thIrty years i6 'the relict of Constipation Teethiing Troubles and ire Stomach and Bowels healthy and natural sleep. M'other's Friend. OR IA ALWAYS ignature of ver 30 Years 0 Always Bought V. New YoRK crry, CHEWING TOBACCO Try the Smoke-Mellow as the Mloonlight. no3t in., WNSOem. AJMN.C