Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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WILIAM 0,6y IrPANcES (Copyright, by Roll CHAPTER IV.-Continued. "Ain't she a peach?" asked Jimmy. "She's my sweetheart and she is 'bout the swellest sweetheart they is." "She's mine, too." promptly replied Billy, who had fallen in love at first sight. "I's a-goin' to have her fer my sweetheart, too." "Naw, she ain't yours, neither; she's mine," angrily declared the other lit tle boy, kicking his rival's legs. "You all time talking 'bout you going to have Miss Cecilia for your sweetheart. She's done already prohiised me." "I'll tell you what," proposed Billy, "lemmne have her an' you can have Aunt Minerva." "I wouldn't have Miss Minerva to save your life," replied Jimmy disre spectfully, "her nake ain't no bigger'n that," making a circle of his thumb and forefinger. " liss Cecilia, Miss Cecilia," lie shrieked tantalizingly, "is my sweetheart." "I' betcher I have her fer a sweet heart soon as ever I see her," said Billy. "What's your name?" asked Jimmy presently. "Aunt Minerva says it's William Green Hill, but 'tain't, it's jest plain Billy," responded the little boy. "Ain't God a nice, good old man," remarked Billy, after they had swung In silence for a while, with an evident desire to make talk. "That he is," replied Jimmy, en thusiastically. "He's 'bout the forgiv ingest person ever was. I just couldn't get 'long at all 'thout him. It don't make no differ'nce what you do or how many times you run off, all you got to do is just ask God to forgive you and tell him you're sorry and ain't going to do so no more, that night when you say your prayers, ana it's all right with God. S'posing he was one of these wants-his-own-way kind o' mans, he could make hi'self the troublesomest person ever was, and little boys couldn't do nothing a tall. I sure think a heap of God. He ain't never give me the worst of It yet." "I wonder What he looks like," mused Billy. "I s'pec' he just looks like the three headed giant in 'Jack the Giant Kill er,'" explained Jimmy, " 'cause he's got three heads and one body. Ilis heads are name' Papa, Son and Holy Ghost, and his body Is just name' plain God. Miss Cecilia 'splained it all to me and she is 'bout the splendid est 'splainer they is. She's my Sun day school teacher." "She's goin' to be my Sunday school teacher, too," said Billy, serenely. "Yours nothing; you all time want my Sunday school teacher." "J mmee!" called a voice from the inter or of the house in the next yard, "Somebody's a-callin' you," said Billy. "That ain't nobody but mamma," ex plained Jimmy composedly, "Jimmee-eel" called the voice, k. "Don't make no noise," warned that little boy; "maybe she'll give up toreckly." "You Jimmee!" his mother called again, Jimmy made no move to leave the swing, "I don't never have to go 'less she says 'James Lafayette Garner,' then I got to hustle," he remarked, "Jimmy Garner!" "She's miglyty near got me," he said softly; ~ t maybe she'll get tired and won't 4'.no more. Shean' plumb m . "Jamem der!" "It's cpenow," saidl Jimmy dole fully. --- e Ta I icf little boys sat very still To those 'why '& Lafayette Garner!" But the /w younger child sprang to his "I got to get a move on now.'" he said; "'When she calls like that she - means business. I botcher she's got a switch and a hair brush and a slip per in her hand right this minute. I'll be back torockly," he promised. He was as good as his word, and In a very short time he was sitting again facing Billy In the swing. "She just wanted to know where her embroid'ry scissors was," he ex plained. "It don't matter what's lost in that house, I'm always the one that's got to be 'sponsible and all time got to go look for it." "Did you find 'em?" asked BIlly.. "Yep; I went right straight where I left 'em yeste'day. I had 'em trying to cut a piece of wire. I stole off and wont down to Sam Lamb's house >$ this morning and tooken breakfast with him and his old woman, Sukey," he boasted. "I knows Sam Lamb," said Billy. * "I rode up on the bus with him." "lHe's my partner," remarked Jitnmy, "Hie's mine, too," said Billy, quickly, * "No, he ain't neither; you all time talking 'bout you going to have Sam Lamb for' a partner. You want every thing I got. You want Miss Cecilia and you want Sam Lamb, Well, you just ain't n-going to have 'eam, You got to get somnebody else for yotur part ner and sweetheart." "Well, you jest wait an' seo," said .Billy. "I got M ajor M inerva." "Shudka, they ain't no) major name' that away," and .Jimmy changed the snhiect"Sam Lamb's sow's got seven INVLVA rid GREDI HIlL OYD CALHOUN ly & Britton Co.) little pigs.- He let me see 'em suck," said Saw Lamb's Partner proudly. "He's got a cow, too; she's got the worrisimest horns ever was. I be lieve she's a steer anyway." "Shucks," said the country boy, con temptuously. "You do' know a steer when you see one; you can't milk no steer." CHAPTER V. Turning on the Hose. "Look! Ain't that a snake?" shrieked Billy, pointing to what looked to him like a big snake coiled in the yard. "Snake, nothing!" sneered his com panion, "that's a hose. You all time got to call a hose a snake. Come on, let's sprinltle," and Jimmy sprang out of the swing, jerked up the hose and dragged it to the hydrant. "My main ma don't never 'low me to sprinkle with her hose, but Miss Minerva she's so good I don' reckon she'll care," he cried mendaciously. Billy followed, watched his compan ion screw the hose to the faucet and turn the water on. There was a hiss ing, gurgling sound and a stream of water shot out, much to the rapture of the astonished Billy. "Won't Aunt IMinerva care?" he asked, anxiously. "Is she a real 'ligious 'oman?" "She is the . Christianest woman they is," annount vd the other child. "Come on, we'll sprinkle the street and I don't want nobody to get in our way neither." "I wish Wilkes Booth Lincoln could see us," said Miss Minerva's nephew. A big, fat negress, with a bundle of clothes tied in a red table cloth on her head, caine waddling down the sidewalk. Billy looked at Jimmy and giggled; Jimmy looked at Billy and giggled; then, the latter took careful aim and a stream of water hit the old woman squarely in the face. "Who dat? What's yo' doin'?" she yelled, as she backed off. "I's a-gwine to tell yo' pappy, Jimmy Garner," as she recognized one of the culprits. "P'int dat ar hose 'way f'om me, 'fo' I make yo' ma spank yuh slabsided. I got to git home an' wash. Drap it, I tell yuh!" Two little girls rolling two doll buggies in which reposed two enor mous rag-babies were seen approach ing. "That's Lina Hamilton and Frances Black," said Jimmy, "they're my chums." Billy took a good look at them. "They's goin' to be my chums, too," he said, calmly. "Your chums, nothing!" angrily cried Jimmy, swelling up pompously. "You all time trying to claim my chums. I can't have nothing a tall 'thout you got to stick your mouth in. You 'bout the selfishest boy they is. You want everything I got, all time." The little girls were now quite near and Jimmy hailed them gleefully, for getful of his anger: "Come on, Lina, you and Frances," he shrieked, "and we can have the mostest fun. Billy hero's done come to live with Miss Minerva and she's done gone uptown and don't care if we sprinkle, 'cause she's got so much 'ligion." "Hut you know none of us are al lowed to use a hose," objected Lina. "Hut it's so much fun," said Jimmy; "and Miss Minerva she's so Christian she ain't going to raise much of a rough house, and if she do we can run when we see her corning." "I can't run," said Hilly; "I ain't got nowhere t' run to an' "If that ain't just like you. Hilly." interrupted Jimmy, "all time talking 'bout you ain't got nowhere to run to; you don't want nobody to have no run. You 'bout the plcayunest boy they is." L-ittle Ikcey Rosenstein, better kno~wn as "Goose-Grease," dressed in a ce st off suit of his big brother's, with i'is tather's hat set raklshiy back on his head and over his ears, was coming proudly down the street some distanice off. "Yonder comes Goose-Grease Rosen stein," said Jimmy gleefully. "When he gets right close le's make him hop." "All right," agreed Hilly, his good humor restored, "le's baptize him good." "Oh, .we can't baptize him," ex claimed the other little boy, "'cause he's a Jew and the Blible says not to baptize .Jews. You got to mesmerize 'em. H-ow come me to know so much?" he continued condescendingly. "Miss Cecilia toached me in the Sun (lay school. Sometimes I know so much I feel like I'm going to bust. She teached me 'bout 'Scuffle little chillens and forbid them not,' and 'bout 'Ananias telled Sapphira he done it with his little hatchet,' and 'bout 'Lijah jumped over the moon in a automobile.' I know everything what's in the Bible1. Miss Cecilia sure is a cracker--jack; she's 'bout the stylish est Sunday school teacher they is." "'Twas the cow jumped ever the moon." said Frances, "and1 It isn't in1 the iBible; It's ini 'Mother Goose.'" "And i~lijahi went to heaven in a chariot of fire.' " corrected Lina., ''And I know all 'hout Gabr'el,"' coni tinued Jimmy, unhbashedl. "When f olks called him to blow his trumet he was under the haystack fast asleep." Ikey was quite near by this time to comniiand the attention of the four Children. "Let's inesmerize 0ocse-Greaso," yelled Jimmy, as he turned the stream of watcr full upon himn. Frances. Lina and hilly claibped their hands and laughed for joy. With a terrified and angry shriek their victim, dripping water at every step, ran howling by his tormentors. When he reached a safe distance he turned around, shook a list at them and screamed back: "My papa is going to have you all arrested and locked up in the cala boose." "Calaboose, nothing!" jeered Jimmy. "You all the time wanting to. put some body In the calaboose 'cause they mes merizo you. You got to be mesmer ized 'cause it's in the Bible." A short, stout man, dressed in neat black clothes, was coming toward them. "Oh, that's the major!" screamed Billy delightedly, taking the hose and squaring himself to greet his friend of the train, but Jimmy jerked it out of his hand, before either of them no ticed him turning about, as if for something forgotten. "You ain't got the sense of a one eyed tadpole, Billy," he said. "That's Miss Minerva's beau. Ile's been lov ing her more'n a million years. ily mamma says he ain't never going to marry nobody a tall 'thout he can get Miss Minerva, and Miss Minervwa she just turns upi her nose at anything that wears pants. You better not sprinkle him. Ile's been to the war and got his big too shot off. He kilt 'bout a million Injuns and Yankees and he's name' Major 'cause he's a Confed'rit vetrun. lie went to the war when he ain't but fourteen." "Did he have on long pants?" asked Billy. "I call him Major Minerva-" "Gladys Maude's got the penny skeeters," broke in Frances important ly, fussing over her baby, "and I'm going to see Doctor Sanford. Don't you think she looks pale, Jimmy?" "Pale, nothing!" sneered the little boy. "Girls got to all time play their dolls are sick. Naw; I don't know nothing a tall 'bout your Gladys Maude." Lina gazed up the street. "That looks like Miss Minerva to me 'way up yonder," she remarked. "1 think we had better get away from here before she sees us." Two little girls rolling doll buggies A Stream of Water Hit th fairly flew down the street anid one little boy quickly climbed to the top) of the dividing fence. From this safe vantage piniit he shouted to Billy, wvho was holding the nozzle of the hose out o.f which p)oured a stream of water. "You'd better turn that water off 'cause Miss Minerva's going to be madder'n a green persimmon." "I diV kntow how to," satid Billy for lornly. "Yeou tf it on." "Drop the hose and run to the hy drant and twist that iittle thing at the top,." screamed Jimmy. "You all time got to perpose someping to got little hoyn in trouble anyway," he added un gen-rious ly. "You perposed this yo'self," de clared an indignant Billy. "You said Aunt Minerva's so 'lgious she wonid'nt git mad." "Christian woman's can get just as madi as any other kind," declared the other boy, sliding from his perch on the fence and running across the lawn to dilsaplpear behind his own front steps.~ Holding her skirts nearly up to her knees Miss Minerva stepped gingerly aloog the wet and muddy street till she got to her gate, where her nep hew mect her, looking a little guilty, hut st Ill hoiling his head( up with thatt char'itieistic, manly air which was so attract'ive. "William," she said1 sternly, "I see y'ou have been getting into mischief. and I feel it my dluty to punish you1, so that you may learn to be trust woirl ly. I said nothing to you about the hiose btecause I did not .think you2 would kntow~ how to use it." lI illy remaI~fined silent, lHe (11( not wantt to betray3 his little companions of the mior'ning, so he said' nothing in hiis owni defetnse. 'Comec with mae into the house," con iined his aunt, "you must go to bed Put the child protested vigorously. "non t make maen in tor bdIn tha daytime, Aunit Minerva; me an, Wilkes Dooth Lincoln ain't never went to bed in the daytime since we's born, an' I ain't never bear tell of a real 'ligious 'oman a-puttin' a little boy in bed 'fore it's dark;- an' I ain't never a-going to meddle with yo' ole hose no 1110'." But Miss Minerva was obdurate, and the little boy spent a miserable hour between the sheets. CHAPTER VI. Successful Strategy. "I have a present fir you," said his aunt, handing Billy a long, rectangu lar package. "Thank you, ma'am," said her beam ing nephew as he sat down on the floor, all eager anticipation, and be gan to untile the string. Ils charm ing, changeful face was bright and happy again, but hils expression be caie on1e of indignant amaze as he saw tho contents of the box. "What I want with a doll?" lie asked angrily, "I ain't no girl." "I think every lit tle boy should have a1 (loll and learp to make clothes for it," said Miss Minerva. "I don't want you to be a great, rough boy; I want you to be sweet and gentle like a little girl; I am going to teach you how to sew and cook and sweep, so you may grow up a coi fort to me." This was ia gloomy forecast for fihe little boy acclstolied, Its he had been, to the freedom of a big plantation, and lie scowled darkly. "Me an' WIlkes llooth Lincoln ain't never hafter play with no dolls sence we's born," lie replied sullenly, "we goes in swinimln' an' plays baseball. I can knock a hone-run an' pitch a curve an' ketch a fly. \Why don't you gimiie a baseball bat? I already got a ball what Admiral Farragut gimme. An' I ain't a-goin' to be no sissy neither. Lina an' Frances plays dolls, ie ali' Jimny-" lie stopped inl sudden confusion. "Lina and Frances and .lames!" ex claimed hils aunt. "WVhat (o you know about them, Villian?" The child's face flushed. "I seen 'em this mornin'," lie acknowledged. Miss linerva put a hand on either shoulder and looked straight into his eyes. "William, who started that sprink ling this morning?" she questioned, sharply. hilly flushed guiltily and lowered Ills lids; but only for an instant. Quick ly recovering his composure he re s Old Woman in the Face, turned her gaze steadily and ignored her questloon. "I see yo' beau too, Atunt Minerva, he remarked tranquilly. it was Miss Minerva this time whc lost her coimposure, for her thiln, sal low face became perfeOct ly crimisoni. "My beau?" she asked confusedly "Who put that nonsense into your head ?" "Jimimy show him to me," he re, plIed jauntily, once more master of the situationl aind in full realizattori of the fact. "Why don't you mnarry him, Atunt M inerva, so's lie cotild li r'ight here wIthi us? Ana' I could learr himi how to churn. I s'pec' he'd maki a beautiful churner. IHe shio' is a priet ty little fat man," he continuied fiat teringly. "An' dress? That beaui was jest dressed plumbt iip to the tog notch. I she' wOuild marry him if l'r yeou an' not tturn upi my13 nose at hit 'cause lie wears 1)ants1 an' you catl learn him how to talk properer'n what he do an' I betcherr he'd jest niachelly take to a broom, an' I s'pec' lie ala't got nobody 't all to show himi howv ti sew. All' yo' all could get the doctoi to fe'tchi y'ou a lIttle baby so hi wvouldn't hafter to play wIth 11o doll I shio' wisht we had hIim here."' ended a selfish Ililly, "lie couild save me lot of 'Jteps. Anl' I shio' woul d like i< heari 'bout all them I njuni s an' Yan kees what lie's kIlled." Billy's aunt was v'isIbly em bairrassed. 'rhe persistent adiratlion of thIs her oiie iover', had be'eni 'h-asing ti her, yet she hadl never teen willIng to sacrifice her lndep('nb-rnee for cli car'es andl triatls of mia triuoniy Th'<i existinig state of affairs, hoween th< two was known to ('verone' In th< small towvn, but surb was Mi-.'iss M'tinerva's dignilled ailen nv. that FIb ly wvas the first perison \. L. hadl e've' dtaredc to broach the subjr I ti er. ''SIt dhown he~re. WVi'luun." .he conm mandled, "andic I will readI to you.' "Tel' rne a ta le, he s mi , oki. ... at her with his bright, sweet smile. The doll lay neglected on a chair near by and Billy wanted her to forgot it. "Tell me 'bout Pilierk Peter." "PIlJerk Peter?" there was an inter rogation in her voice. "Yas'i. Ain't you never hear tell 'bout PIlijerk Peter? He had fifteen chillens an' one time the las' one of '1m1 anl' his ole 'onan was down with the fever an' he ain't got but one pill an' they so sick they nos' 'bout to (ie an' ain't nobody in the fiel' fer to pick the cotton an' he can't git no doctor an' lie ain't got but Jest that one 1)pIl; se lie tie that pill to a string an' let the bigges' chile swaller it al' draw it back up an' let tile nex chile swaller it an' Jerk it back up an' let the nex' chile swaller it an' Jerk - it back up an' let the nex'-" "I don't believe in tIling tales to children," interrupted his aunt, "I will tell you biographical and historical stories and stories from the lible. Now listen, while I read to ye." ''An' the nex' chile swaller it, an' he jcrkC it back up," Continued Billy se relely. "an' tile nex' chile swaller it an' lie jerk it back up tell linely ev'y single one of 'em, plumb down to the haby, swaller that pill anll' the as' on1e of ent got well ai' that one pill it done the work. Then he tuck the pill and give it to his ole 'omianl aln' she swaller it all' hie jerk it back up but didn't nothin' 't all come up but Jest tile string an' Ills ole 'olilan she died 'cause all the st rellk done gone outer that pl." lIss Minerva opened a hook called "'ems for the Household." which she had purchased fron a silver-tongued book-agent. She selected anll article the subject of which was "i'le Pure InllHeart." 1lilly listened with a seiningly at tentivc ear to the choice flow of wNordi.-s, but In reality his little brain was bu1sy with its own thoughts. The article closed witi the suggestfion that if one wei.e innocent Iid pulre he would have a dreailess sleep: "If you have a conscience clear, Alid God's coliIIIIndls you keep; If your. heart Is good ail pure. You will have a perfect sleep." Billy's aunt conlud ed. Wishing to know if lie had niderstood what shie had just read sie 111(el: "What people sleep the soundest?" "Niggers," was his prompt. reply, as lie thought of the long suiiimie days and the colored folk an the plantation. She was disappoitted. but not. dis coulraged. "Now, William," she admonisliel, "I'm going to read you another piece, and I wait yoi to tell ime about it, when I get through. Pay strict atLen tion." "Yas'ni," he readily agreed. She chose an article deocribing thi keen sen1se of smell in anim rals. Mis Miinerva was not an elitertainilnf reader and the words were long an( fairly incomprehensible to the litti boy sitting patiently at her side Again his thoughts wandered, thougl every now and then lie caught a wor or two. "What animals have the keenes sense of smell, William?" was he: query at the conclusion of her read ing. "Hilly goats," was Billy's answel without the slIghtest hesitation. "Yotu have goats on the br'ain," shc said ini anger. "I did( nIOt read one word aboutt blilly goats.'' "Well, if 'tain't a billy goat," he repliedl, "1 (d0' know what 'tis' thout it's a skunk." "I bought you a little prlimer this nmorninig," she remarked after a short silence, "and I wianit you to sray a les son every dlay." "I already knows a lot," lie boasted. "Tabuernicle, lie an' Mercantile both been1 to school an' they lear'nt me an' Wilkes Hlooth Lincoln. I knows crooked S. an' br'oken back K, an' curly iail Q. an' roun' 0, an' i can spell c-a-t cat, an' d-o-g dog an' A stantds fel' apple."' That nighit lie conclulded his ever lenigthly prayerCl at his kinis womanU's knee with: "O Lord, please0 make for Autlt Minervai't a lit, le baby, maiike her two of 'emi. 0 Lord(, if yotu gilt 'em1 to sparIe please make her' three little ba bies anl' let 'em1 all be girls so's sh~e -can learni 'em how to churnl an' sew. An' bless Autnt Minerva and Major Mlnervua, f'r e'ver 'ndl ever. Amen." As lhe rose0 from hIs 1kn10s he asked: "Atut Mierva, do God work on Stunday?" "No-o," anlswereid Is relative, hes Itat ingly. "WVell, It 1look like0 He'd Jest hafter worik onl Sunday. lie's so busy jest Ia-mankin' babies10. Ilie makes all the nlggers an' heat hens an' Iilns an' white chillens ; I reckon I To gits some body to hlelp himt. Don't you, Aunt Minerva ?" CHAPTER VII. Rabbits' and Other Eggs. 11illy was si ti ig in the swing. Jiml) my crawledl over the fence and joined him. "M iss ('c-cilia's dyeing me1 sonic Easter eggs," lie saId, "all blue and k(111in they is; I tooken lier' some1 o our hen's eggs and she is going to 1b 'em1 for nm an' ithey'll be juist hlk( r'abbt's eggs; I reckoon I'll have 'hou a m1i llin. I'll give yotu one,"' he addet geneirously3. "'I w'anlt mlore0'r 0on," dleclared 11illy hei Vws uisedh to) having the lion': share of ever'ything. You acll tim11e talkinlg 'bout y'ol wan;l.timore'n one0 egg,''"i lah .limmi) - 'oul 'bout the stingiest l'eteor the; is. Ain't you got no eggs? Get Mi1i .\lnerva to give you sonie of her's atn - 'll take 'emi over and ask Miss (e cilia to dy'e 'emi for you 'cause yo "Aunt Minerva ant get 'cep'in' what she put under a 0 fer to set this mornin'." "Can't you get 'em from under the old lien? Miss Minerva is, such S ,Christian woian, she ain't-" "You done fool me 'bout that 'ligious business befo'," interrupted Billy, "an' I got put to bed in the day times." "Well, sfle won't never miss two O three eggs," coaxed Jimmy. "HOW many did she put under the old hen?" "She put fifteen," was the response, "an' I don't believe she'd want me tO tech 'em." "They're 'bout the prettiest eggs ever .was," continued the tempter, "all blue and pink and green, and 'bout a million kinds. They're just persact ly like rabbit's eggs." "Me an' Wilkes Booth Lincoln ain't never ,hear teller no rabbit's eggs sence we's born," said Billy; "I don't berlieve rabbits lays eggs nohow." "They don't lay 'em 'cept to East er," said Jimmy. "Miss Cecilia 'splain ed it all to me and she's my Sunday School teacher and rabbits is bound to lay eggs 'cause it's in the Bible and she's 'bout the prettiest 'splainer they Is. I'm going over there now to see 'hoit my eggs," and he niade believe to leave the swing. "Le's us slip roun' to the hen-house an' see what the ol' hlen's a-doin'." Siggested the sorely tempted Hilly. "Aiunt Minerva is a-makin' me some night-shirts an' she ain't takin' no no tice of nothin' else." They tiptoed stealthily arotunld the house to the hack-yard, but found the hlii-house door locked. "Can't. you get the key?" asked the younger child. "Naw, I can't," replied the other boy, "but you can git in th'oo this here little hole what the chickens goes in at, whiles I watches fer Aunt Minerva. l'll stand right here an' hol' mlly cap Whiie you fetches me the eggs. An' don't you take moro'n five or six," he warned. "I'm skeered. of the old lien," ob jected Jimmy. "Is she much of a pecker?" "Naw, she ain't a-goin' to hurt you." was the: encouraging reply. "Git up all' crawl th'oo; I'll help you." illy, having overcome his scruples. now entered into the undertaking with great zest. ,. .Jimmy climbed the chicken ladder, kIlked his chubby legs through the aperture, hung suspended on his fat little middle for an instant, and final 1y, with much panting and tugging, wriggled his plump, round body into the ben-house. Ie walked over where a lonesome looking hen was sitting patiently on a nest. lie put out a cautious hand and the hen promptly gave It a vicious peck. "Hilly," he called angrily, "you got o ce Ill here and hold this old chicken; she's 'bout the terriblest pecker they is." Hilly stuck his head in the little square hole. "Go at her from behind." lie suggested; "put yo' hand under her easy like, an' don' let ier know what you's up to." .Jimmy tried to follow these instruc (ions. but received another pock for his pains. He promptly mutinied. "It you want any eggs," lie de clared, scowling at the face framed In the aperture, "yotu can comle get 'em yourself. I dlone monkeyed with this chicken all l'm going to." So Hilly climbed up and easily 'got his lean little body through the open tug, lHe dlexterouisly caught the hen b~y the nape of the neck, as lie had seen Aunt Cindy do, while Jimmy reached for the eggs. "If we ain't done lef' my cap out side0 on the groun'," said Billy. "What we goen' to put the eggs in?" "Well, that's just like you, Billy, you all time got to leave your cap on the ground. T'll put 'em in my bloulse tIll you get outside and then PIl hand 'em to you. How many you going to take?" "We might julst as well git 'em all now." said Hilly. "Aunt Cindy say I he's some koindeur hiens won't lay no ('ic(kens 't all If folks putt they hands in they nlests anl' this here hen look like to me she's otne of them kind. so the rester the eggs 'Il jest be waste, lany how, 'caulse you done Put yo' han's it htet' iies', an' a dominicker itn't a-goin' to stan' no priojeckin' wuithl her' eggs. Hurry upi." Jimmy carefully distributed the eggs inside his blouse, and Hilly once nior'e crawle'd throulgh the hole and stood on the outside waiting, cap In hand, to receive them. But the patient hen had at last raised her voice ir~ angry protest and set up a furious cackling, which so frightened the little boy on the inside that he was panic-stricken. H~e caught hold of a low roost pole, swung him self tup and, wholly unmindful of his blouse full of eggs. pushed his lower A pair of chubby, cturdy logs, down which were slowly trickling little yel low r'ivullets, and half t. plump, round b~ody were aull that would go through. "Putll!" yelled the owner of the short fat legs. '"I'm stuck and can'6 go no furder. Pull me th'oo, Billy." (TO BEt CONTINUED.) None for, Him, .Thank You. Repreaentatives. Hughes and Kin kead of New Jersey and Cravens of Ar kansas, wits of the house, had just returned from the funeral of a col league. They were discussing the Ipomi) and publicity of a congressionaj funieral. '1 (10 not want such a funeral, do you, 'Gene?" said Mr. Hughes to Mr. Kinkend. . "No, Hilly, I do not care to be put away with *so - much display. What about you, Blen?" said Mr. Kinkead, turninig to Mr. Crav'ens. "I don't wvant ani funeral," respon& ed1 the southerner, dryly.-Washine 'ton Cor respondence in New yowh