Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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| Chestnut Croej Mistaken. For six years a bitter feud had existed between the Browns and Robinsons, next door neighbors, says Tit Bits. The trouble had originated through the depredations of Brown's cat, and had grown so fixed an affair that neither party ever dreamed of "making up." One day, however, Brown sent his servant next door with a peace-making note for Mr. Robinson, which read: "Mr. Brown sends his compliments to Mr. Robinson, and begs to say that his old cat died this morning." Robinson's written reply was bitter: "Mr. Robinson is sorry to hear of Mr. Brown's trouble, but he had not heard that Mrs. Brown was ill." 9 riore Interesting. ? The old darkey was having his eyes tested for glasses, according to the Bohemian. After the oculist had put up several cards of Roman letters, which the negro vainly endeavored to call off correctly, he looked over at the oculist and asked with some disgust: "Whar's de use in lookin' at dem fings?" "With them I'm trying to find out TrA11 non coo HicHnpt.lv." IIUW 1<U JVU OVV vttwwM?vw^ , _ _ turned the eye specialist. "Wal," declared the old darkey, unsatisfied, "dey ain't wuth tryin't' make out. Put up er watermillion." What His Wife was Doing. A young married man of extremely jealous disposition recently visited 1 one of the most famous mediums in London. Being far from home, he wanted to know what his wife was doing. "She is looking out of the window, evidently expecting some one." "That is strange," said Benedick. ' "Whom can she expect?" "Some one enters the door and she caresses him fondly," went on the medium. "It can't be!" cried the excited husband. "My wife is true to me." "Now he lays his head on her lap and looks tenderly in her eyes." "It's false! I'll make you pay dearly for this!" yelled the jealous hus XNUttl. "Now he wags his tail," said the medium. The green-eyed monster subsided, and the young husband cheerfully paid over his consulting fee. Would Take Chances. A short time ago an old negro was up before a Judge in Dawson City, charged with some trivial offence. "Haven't you a lawyer, old man?" inquired the Judge. "No, sah." "Can't you get one?" "No, sah." "Don't you want me to appoint one to defend you?" \ "No, sah. I jes' tho't I'd leab de case to de jgn'ance ob de co't." ?? Two Loads of Hell. Two Irishmen who had just landed in America had taken a room in one of the down-town lodging-houses in New York. They were awakened in the middle of the night by a great noise in the street. One of the Irishmen got up and looked out of the window. IVo fire-engines tore along, belching smoke and fire, and leaving a trail of sparks. "Phwat is it?" asked the man who remained in bed. "They're moving hell," said the man at the windows; "and two loads have just gone by." Related to Both. An Irishman walking in one of the i streets of Dublin saw a man leading * ? ?i a dog on the opposite side 01 tne street, says Illustrated Bits. He got rather interested in the dog, and, crossing the street, he touched the man on the shoulder and said: "Would ye moind telling me the breed of that dog?" The man, who happened to be in a bad temper, turned round and, looking at the Irishman, said: "Yes; it's a cross between a monkey and an Irishman." "Shure," said Pat. "It's related to both of us." The Foreman (back for instructions)?Jedge, we're all tangled up concernin' th' testymony of Jim Boggs. The Court?Don't you know what to do with it? The Foreman ?We knowed jest what t' do with it, tell we diskivered wher' he'd told th' truth in one place. Alice?Jack was so romantic in his proposal! He said I was a white pearl shining on a sun-kissed coral strand. Maude (disgusted)?Can't Jack - ever be original? He said the same thing to me three years ago, and I know that he cribbed the expression from a ten-cent calendar. '"T. 1, " 1611 me, my puui m<ui, muu mc good-hearted old lady, "to what do you attribute your fondness for drink? Is it hereditary?" "No, ma'am," replied the poor man, "it's thirst." Three hundred teachers are needed in the Philippines. Remember that nearly half the teachers that went there several years ago married on the way. Do you see the special inducements to go? i FINE BEARDJMRY Champ Clark Hurries to Capital to Defend Missouri Variety. "GREATEST IN THE WORLD." Congressman Cites Two Beards, One Nine and the Other Eleven Feet Long?Why He Considers Whiskers i"rJiz-oc of Character. Champ Clark, congressman from Pike county, Mo., is among those who have arrived in Washington for the coming session of congress, says a special dispatch to the New York Thnes. Some fellow in Washington recently made the statement that he knew a man who had a beard seven feet long. "That's 'no beard at all," said Mr. Clark, and he wrote a letter to the Washington Post telling about a man in Pike county who had a beard as is a. beard. The public not being fully satisfied, the congressman from Pike went on to Washington two weeks earlier than he intended to-see about it He gave out an interview on the subject the other day, and if any one further questions that Missouri produces the greatest whiskers in the world the matter will be brought up ?J - "??Anlol iniToafl era tlor) in congress auu a s^cuu> ^?? askei for. "Judge Elijah Gates," said Mr. Clark, "has a beard nine feet and a half long. He lives in my county, Just a few miles from my house, and I know him very well. But his whiskers are not any special curiosity, because there is a man a few miles farther down the road who has a beard eleven and a half feet long. This man's name is Valentine Tapley. I know him very well. "These fellows make me think a man's character can be told by his whiskers. Now, Elijah Gates is a pugnacious kind of fellow, not a scrapper or a brawler, you understand, but of a stubborn type of man. His whiskers are right stiff, like a horse's mane. But Valentine Tapley?his are soft as silk, and Tapley is mild mannered and thoroughly agreeable, one of those unanl i. inous son. 01 icuvwo. "Of course these fellows do not wear their beards down all the time. They couldn't do it without tying a knot in them like 'a horse's tail. But they wear 'em inside their vests in silk bags. Old man Tapley takes his out once or twice a year for the benefit of his neighbors. Old man Elijah Gates takes his out, too, but only to comb it He has one of those sugar tree combs made for it, and he combs it with that" Mr. Clark has no suggestion of a hirsute adornment on his classic face. No one is therefore able to read his character from his beard. If he had one, though, it would probably not be soft and silken like Valentine Tapley's, for Mr. Clark Is not unanimous. In addition to this whiskers matter upon which he is engaged, he is preparing himself for a fight against the California congressmen who have been trying for several years to put i out of business the greatest winery in the world, which is Pike county, Mo. They propose to do it by having all wine In the making of which sugar is used termed adulterated wine or artificial wine. "This is because out in California there is a grape, the only one In the world, which has enough natural sugar in it to make wine without any additional sugar," he said.. "For several successive years they have been trying all sorts of schemes to declare that the only pure wine. "I went over to see Dr. Wiley about this thing several years ago, before we had any pure food law, when he was about to declare the wine made with suear adulterated under an old statute which declared that there should be certain fixed standards of things, like yardsticks, gallon measures and so forth. "They introduced a bill in congress next I killed that, and now they are going to introduce another, and ITI have to fight that" So it is wine and whiskers which bring Champ Clark back to Washington, two things which he is usually thought to hare no interest in at all. Discovery of Curious Sepulcher. A curious sepulcher containing the bodies of many children has been discovered near the Pyramid of the Sun at San Juan, Mexico, says a special dispatch from the City of Mexico to the New York Times. The sepulcher was covered by a huge tombstone on which is carved the face of a woman surrounded by hieroglyphics. The body of one of the children in the sepulcher is quite well preserved?almost petrified. This, with the tombstone, will soon be brought to the National museum. Thanksgiving Anticipations. Of course we'll have a turkey, A great, big, husky feller, 'N' vegtabuls of every kind? Pertaters, white and yeller. Turnips 'n' squasn n' onions, xoo, Urn! Um! 'N' celery. 'N' stuffln', that's the best of all, Fixed up with savory. 'N* pies! Well, I'm prepared to say All other kinds is fakes Alongside o' the punkin ones An' mince my mother makes! Besides, they's apple turnovers To cap the hull array. An' I can have two slabs of each, 'Cause it's Thanksgiving day. But, after eatin' fruit 'n' nuts 'N' candy with the rest, I bet I'll feel like letting out The buttons on my vest! 'N* warkin' round the block is good For appetites like mine. Then afterward I'll feel like "more"? Gee, ain't Thanksgiving fine! ?M&xle V. Caruthers in November Lippinoott's. CRIME DECREASED. Only Five Homicides in Greenville County the Past Year. Greenville, Dec. 2.?During the past twelve months there have been only five homicides in this county, while for the past five or six years previous murders have averaged at least one a month. The vigilance of officers in the Dark Corner and the enforcement of the laws against vagrancy and pistol toting have had much to do with the decrease of crime. Prohibition advocates, on the other hand, give en' * 1'-i- (lflTI. lire creun xui iuc un^iufvu wn ditions to the abolition of the local dispensaries. Speaking of the address of Dr. Henry S. Hartzog before the Arkansas Baptist Convention, the Baptist Advance says: "Dr. Hartzog, Ouachita's new president, was the first speaker and made one of the finest addresses ever delivered on the subject of education before an Arkansas Convention. We have asked Dr. Hartzog for this speech and hope to give it to our readers. This first appearance of Ouachita's new president made a pleasing impression on all who heard him. Ouachita will go forward under his administration." 1 Bamberg a Peanut Town. In a letter to the Hampton Guardian, Mrs. A. McB. Speaks writes of the habit of eating peanuts on Main street here as follows: "The peanut season is upon us. On Saturday a multitude of darkies no man can number, flock to town, and and on every street corner can be seen with a bag of roasted peanuts 'cracking and chawing,' as Editor Bacon of Edgefield humorously expresses it. "On Mondays, before the street cleaner makes his rounds, the side walks are covered with hulls, pre senting the appearance of a city strewn with confetti during a carnival! "My other half declares if he had the exclusive right to sell peanuts here, he could make a fortune." You know as well as any one when you need something to regulate your system. If your bowels are sluggish, your fooc distresses you, your kidneys pain, take Hollister's Rocky Mountain Tea. It always relieves. 35 cents, Tea or Tablets. H. F. Hoover. ID. DELKl I CARRIAGE WORKS ANYTBIM ON WHEELS Delivery wagons, one and two horse farm wagons, ice wagons, log carts, sewing machine wagons, or any kind of special work built to order on short notice. First-class repair and paint shop, does pipe work and carries piping and fixtures, brass fittings, engine supplies, injectors, steam gauges, engine oils, large stock of buggies, harness, lap robes and whips for sale cheap. All work will be appreciated and satisfaction guaranteed ID. J. DELK BAMBERG, 5. C. WlNTFO! VI nai wmwr Fifty Colored Laborers at Once For Logging, Railroad and Sawmill Work. STEADY WORK GOOD WAGES Paid Every Night Witt Checks which may b( turned into office ever) two weeks to be cashed House Root Free Also can use white laboi Call or Address BREON LUMBER CO, ULMERS, - - - - - S. C, Located on 5. A. L. Railroad. |W. P. RILEY FIRE, LIFE 2 ACCIDENT | INSURANCE BAMBERG. - - - - S. C. LIBRARIES OF THE FUTURE. Will Be Public Storehouse# of Knowledge, Says a Librarian. John Cotton Dana, librarian of the Newark (N*. J.) Free Fublie library, has put himself on record as believing that the newspapers are gradually assuming the work of libraries and that in future use the latter institutions will be rather public storehouses of knowledge, serving as a guide and index rather than as a place of instruction and amuseiL.'Dt. He expressed these opinions in an address made at Trenton. N. J., before the New Jersey Library association on "Anticipation; nr What We Mav Expect In Libra ries," says the New York Times. "The newspapers will more and more usurp the work of libraries," said Mr. Dana. "They will be printed in larger type and on better paper. They will be systematically arranged and will have a digest and indices. In their magazine departments they will publish novels, essays, poems, dramas, histories and biographies by the best writers of the day as well as the results of the cogitations of the best philosophers, the anticipations of the best sociologists and the conclusions of the best scientists. Their illustrations will be superior to the finest that books now offer. "The Sunday supplements already 1 suggest what newspapers will soon furnish us in art and illustration. Truly, the newspapers will be our educational salvation, for they will enable us to acquire in the simplest and quickest way by pictures at least a I little of the vast mass of Information which the world's web of wires, reticulation of rails and fleets of ocean fer, ries will daily bring us. "We are just learning to read newspapers. When all of us?not a few | only, but all of us?truly have the | newspaper habit, the demand will . bring forth sheets such as are not now dreamed of?yellows to the yellow1 minded, and both will be with us for many a day. But the mechanism and ; brains and skill are here to produce, and the sufficient demand which is sure to come may any day call forth [ a daily paper of clearness, accuracy, , breadth, simplicity and beauty far bel yond the wildest prophecies of the most optimistic editor." SIRE A FRESHIE, SON A SOPH. Father Hazed by Son, but Took the Latter's Shirt In a Ruth. A son is a sophomore and his father has to wear a freshman cap in the State University of Missouri, says a Columbia (Mo.) dispatch to the New York Times. Elmer Ellsworth Vannatta has returned to the university after an absence of twenty-three years and has begun a four years' course in the agricultural department. His son, Earl, went to the university last year and is now enrolled as a full sophomore. The senior Vannatta is forty-four years old. At the age of twenty he s>amo tn fvdnmhifl and snent one vear in the academic department He then returned home and married a graduate of Stephens college, Columbia. The younger Vannatta, twenty years old, aided in compelling "the governor" to discard his hat and don a little cap, according to the edict issued by the upper class men. The old man got even a few days later in the class rush. He lined up with the "freshies," and when the dust cleared away he was waving three-fourths of his heir's shirt. The father goes in for gymnasium work three times a week and takes in cross country runs with members of his class who are in their teens. He is afraid to tackle football, but is a rooter of the first water. (Grand Exhibition of Japan. The exhibition to be held In Tokyo in 1912, according to the China Telegraph, is to be called the Grand Exhi bition of Japan. It is to be held be| tween April 1 and Oct 31, 1912, and is intended to demonstrate the growth of f Japanese industry, civilization and resources. It is not only proposed to be I the greatest fair ever held in Japan, 1 but to give accommodation to the different exhibits of foreign countries. The expenditure, inclusive of 10,000,000 yen (a yen equals 49.8 cents), to be J " ? -V ^ VVTT 4-VkSV AAVlfMol A'ATT Aim m OT1 f UCim^CU U J LUC LCUUOl gvtLluuivuk, will be an unprecedented amount together with that to be expended by provincial governments and new territories. In addition to ample facilities to be given to foreign exhibitors the erection of special halls by foreign countries is anticipated, and the rei qdired tracts of land are to be offered > gratuitously. Gold Leaf as Brain Covering. Richard Swanger, who was unconscious for eleven days from a depressed fracture of the skull, caused by a tree falling upon him, is recovering from a remarkable surgical operation as a result of which he will carry a quantity of gold leaf in his head, says a Baltimore dispatch to the New York Tribune. The surgeons at Maryland University hospital found a part of the brain covering and a part of the ) brain itself adhered to the dura matter. The brain covering and the gray ' matter were separated and the gold leaf was placed between the parts. ? Missouri Pearls. t Lon Palmer, a resident of Stotts City, Mo., has disposed 'of $22,000 I worth of pearls to eastern gem cutters during the present year, says the Kank sas City Journal. The stones were taken from Spring river, near Stotts t City. Among the sixty-four gems Mr. Palmer yet has in his possession are t two weighing 119 grains and 66 grains respectively. IA^^JTbrabITAAU OLD LINE @ CIDC onA I ICC IMQITff A MfF I 11 ill HiUIIU Ivll V liwtimnvv ? jqyvPvyypnjfllsjgWgn^ltgWgHgWgWgltgHgllgilgllgyljpigWy^flW^nyi^l^gr A si \T/E Endeavor to advance the /\uVlirlCl FT y * * business interests of our customers in every legitimate way. In TU&: fm . so doing, our motives may be some1. llvli what tinctured with selfishness, for upon the prosperity of its patrons J l*C5tS hinges the success of every bank. WE PAY INTEREST J i-? I-J /A r? i n o D A rVT \*T 1 f O U f Lr Er O L? /"* i ^ ?v ^ BAMBERG SOUTH CAROLINA J ^^MHM?MMM ?WHMMMM ? M gtl? tl? :!: -Hi ?Ii :!? si? :!? ! ! ili ! ! sn gi il i ili iis sis gg Inew novelties! 1 ? ?8 !J IN OUR LINE CONSTANTLY COMING IN :? ? * ? #f $ <j >ii ? ?? ? ? m jf; |g ; ; CALL BEFORE THE HOLIDAY RUSH. BE IN ; :: TIME. OUR PRICES ALWAYS THE LOWEST 2 ? . ' ? ? if "M a = = .fgf ' ? ^ ? 'Oil I jj -1 II Mrs. K. I. Shuck & .Co. jt 'M :? Bamberg South Carolina | $ 2? !; ill- tl? ;R ;T? !? ;R ?!: ill- tl) iR 0? il? iR iR il? 0? iR j| -t WE HANDLE A- -ra ' Fine Line of Buggies i " feia Consisting of Rubber tire, Open and Top Buggies, Harness and Whips, also a selected line of both ... , 3 ONE AND TWO-HORSE WAGONS j Call and see us and get our cheap .|| prices before buying BLACK & BLACK BAMBERG SOUTH CAROLINA DEPOSITORS |p Like to feel in bringing their business to a Bank they are helping to build it up?in other words, they are y-; giving something for what they receive. We want you to feel the same way towards us. We want your account?want to make ourselves useful to you in anything pertaining to finance?and we can do it with profit to you and ourselves. * BAMBERG BANKING COMPANY, Bankerg, S. C.. f'4 IHOLI DAY GOODS] M * . - - I Beautiful line of Holiday Goods for Xmas J * presents. Large assortment of Toys for I the children. We have a present for any- I , body. Don't fail to see the line. No trouble | to show goods. A fine line of Cut Glass. I \ $ V Hoover's Drug Store! TELEPHONE 44 BAMBERG, S. C. I ? ? :M | SPECIAL PRICES! I am now I I ????????????? making I I I special prices on my entire stock of Hardware, II Guns, Lamps Crockery, Building Material, Etc. II It will pay you to see me before you buy. The stock is too large ????? and must be re- J. A. HUNTER ! duced at once, successor to c. j. s. brooker J_== ? ] f LIVERY STABLE] We are now in our new building ready and anxious I to serve you with nice livery gj Good Teams. Careful Drivers I Give us your patronage for everything in the livery I line. Horses for sale or trade I J J. SMOAK, Bamberg, S. C. I '' -. - ^ r: z . -i:M