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THE FORT MILL TIMES Published Every Thursday. FORT MILL, 80UTH CAROLINA. It Is up to the police to make safe blowing unsafe. If New York can't And a new sensation it stirs up an old one. Eggs are 3 cents per dozen In China, and no china eggs at that. Why not expand the antl-nolse crusade 30 as to Include the checkerboard suit? At the same time, don't wait for your neighbor to swat the flies. Get busy yourself. A New York woman lost $440 which she carried In her stocking. How, is not explained. No Booner are wo through with the coal man than the Ice man becomes our daily horror. A new street dress for women has side pockets In the skirt which can be found by a tnan. Milwaukee paper headline says a horse waB bitten on the north side by a bulldog. Figure it out. A WelBh rarebit wrb employed to put out a Are, being Impressed into service as a flail, perhaps. Experts tell ub how to achieve a ripe old age, when what one wants is to retain oiio'h verdant youth. Not from nn artist's brush, but woman's hat. do wo get the full force of spring s variegnted beauty. In Paris a hotel Is to be opened without servants. One excellent way In which to get rid of tipping It Is said that Cleopatra danced the tango and the turkey trot. Now let's see, what bocame of Cleopatra? Chances for the small boy to become president some day are far better In Mexico than in Uncle Sam's domain. Some women have taken to wearing watches on their ankles while others are merely retaining their common sense. A Boston man writes: "If I had a million dollars, 1 would go home and kiss my wife." His wife's kisses must come high. The Benson approaches when many will leave comfortable homes and hie away to some mosquito infested watering pluce. Still, it seems like taking an unfair advantage of a hard working microbe when a human being saturates himself with onions. You may think when you buy lamb chops you get the butcher's goat, but when his hill comes in you realize that he gets yours. The owner of a stubborn auto chopped it up and sold the Junk. The same amount of energy might have moved the car. A Chicago barber gives a fresh egg with every shave. Now if that action is in lieu of conversation our approbation lb manifest. That business man who was arrested and Jniled for being too full, wns dealt with In a natural way. His friend hailed him out. Western man who thought he saw snakes while on a spree and rnn Into n train and was seriously injured. Must have been rattled The New York Sun says the only plnce where a person can live cheaply In Utopin. And it is not on the map. Eastern police who nrrested cheese dealers for selling over ripe product, clnim to have strong evidence against those arrested. Strange! The price of artificial ice. it is announced. will go up next summer. It milfif ho fl*o nr( Iflnln I nniwlu ioaoa ?av? on the Job during tho winter. One statistician estimates thnt there are 10.000.000 tunes in existence, but the composers of modern musical comedies do not seem to know of more than two or three. Somebody remarks that the guitar may be a musical Instrument but It was never known to pay any dividends. Still. Its notes of hnhd are usually accepted at full value. A soiled greenback Is restored to Its original pristine glory by washing and ironing at the cost of 1-10 cent. But the average man worries not at all whether his greenbacks be dirty. Fashion hook says tlint women of America like tight gowns Well, a tight gown does seem to be a little full when It encloses a fat woman. According to an Insurance statistician. It costs |1F>,000 to kill a man. Oh. well, the poor have no show in this country. We can't afford It! A Los Angeles Judge Just granted a wife a divorce because her husband apanked her. Probably he should have used a club and have been given * One for assault and battery. k3&k>V, ...car"-*' ' i AMERICAN GIRLS WHO ARE NEAR FAMOUS THRONES Many Prominent Philadelphia Women Have Married Into Noble Families in the Various Countries of Europe. HAPPY MATCHES MADE Majority of the Alliances Have Been Supremely Successful in Every Way. 9 Evidently Not All Foreign Noblemen Are Mere Fortune Hunters?Many Matrimonial Prizes Secured by the Fair Daughters of Uncle Sam. Philadelphia.?Dwelling amid mediaeval surroundings in storied castles. secluded in vast demesnes or iu more modern* and incidentally more comfortable palaces of various cities of Europe, is quite a large group of Philadelphia women who have become the wives of noblemen and who with characteristic adaptability have become active helpmates In their husbands' interests. Rare, indeed, have these alliances between women of this city and the men of titles from abroad proved unhappy, and in the main the noblemen who have bestowed their rank upon maids of this city have proved themselves worthy ' of the matrimonial prizes they have won. Some Have Succeeded in Business. In not a few instances these men have been in business quite after the " t American fashion, and have made successes of their various undertak- 1 ings, maintaining their personal inter- J est in them even after their coffers 1 had been replenished by the dowries f of their wives. They have done much * to change the opinion prevalent in ' tliiB country some years ago that for- ? eign noblemen were merely fortune- * hunters and little else, and they have reversed the Disraeli dictum that ' "men who marry their wives for love * either beat them or run away from ' them." 1 The most notable instance of a * young, beautiful nnd wealthy Philadelphia girl murrylng a man of exalted j title, but who before his marriage did not deem it beneath his dignity to 1 work in a stock broker's oillce, was Miss Margaretta Drexel, who was f wedded several years ago to the Vis- ! count Maidstone. It waB a genuine love-match, and the ceremony, which took place in Ixmdon, was one of the j most important matrimonial events of ' tl*at season, since, aside from the A distinction of the bridegroom's family, ' the bride's mother and father, Mr. and 1 Mrs. Anthony J. Drexel, are among the most popular Americans dwelling I in the British metropolis. An exceedingly important alliance was made by Lady Maidstone's cousin. Miss Anita Stewart, who is now the Princess de Braganza. her husband being a son of the pretender to tho present nonexistent throne of Portugal. Miss Stewart's mother is a sister of Mrs. Drexel and the widow of James Henry Smith, the multimillionaire, who died in Jnpan shortly after his marriage. The wedding of Miss Stewnrt and the prince took place in Scotland, and there was much discussion at the time as to the lirnnrlolv /->f u><> k-?.i~ | v/1 IIIC U1 H1U" J J groom's attendants wearing the na- , tlonal Caledonian costume, with the , plaid of the Stewart clan. There was } also some nonsensical but romantic talk to the efTect that the Smith mil- ( lions would be used to finance a revolution which would have as its pur- , pose the placing of the prince upon Portugal's throne, thus providing Europe with her first American queen. ( About seven years ago there was a noon wedding at St. Patrick's church, < In Twentieth street, and this was of , so quiet and unostentatious a nature that many parishioners who had merely dropped into the church to ofTer up a midday prayer were unaware that , by the ceremony they were witnessing a Philadelphia girl was being made the Countess ltorchgrave d'Altena. i She was Miss Ruth Snyder, daughter of Mrs. Thomas Alexander Iteilly by her first marriage, and a niece of Charlemagne Tower, former ambassador to Cermnny. Practical Nobleman. Miss Emily Harney's marriage to ' itaron Krledrlch von Miller was also ; a comparatively quiet one. She Is the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Charles D. j Barney and granddaughter of Jay I Cooke, the Civil war financier. The i young, good-looking and most affable ! baron was at the time engaged tn i business in Mexico, and in this he hns continued since his marriage. Ho <s essentially a sensible and practical man, who, down in his heart of hearts, really doesn't care much about titles. He is much more concerned In making a name for himself as a successful business man, thus taking patI tern after the family of hla wife. I i |J ' r. * |e? :V"rT' , Wgr * ML* -' r vj re - \ jfr COUNTESS (Miss Kathryn Mrs. Jason Waters' daughter, Miss | Cllen Nixon Wain, now the Raroness facques de Meyronnet de San Marc, s the chatelaine of one of the beautiul homes of Paris, and by reason of ter own charm and the distinction of icr husband's family she has won a ligh place in exclusive Parisian society. There are many who will recall the >eautiful wedding in the Church of he Redeemer at Bryn Mawr, when he lovely Gertrude llerwind. daugher of the wealthy coal family, became the Baroness Rocklin von Rockinsau. This was an unusually im- | )ortant matrimonial event, for the ' jaron's family is one of great emi- I icnce in the kaiser's domain. The 1 roung nobleman at his wedding gave evidence of the much discussed Gernan "thoroughness." by replying to | he clergyman Is various questions In j he marriage ritual in so loud and Irm a voice as to be heard in all larts of the church, a circumstance vhich caused many to smile, since it ifforded so marked a contrast to the iaanl tremulously whispered answers. Two Sisters Marry Noblemen. Two sisters. Mary and Clara, of the 'amous and wealthy Roberts family, svhose classic-looking home at Nineeenth and Walnut streets is such a loy to those who love the simplicity of he antique, married noblemen of | much distinction. The former is the Marquise d'Eskens de Frenoy, now ; living in Paris, while the latter, who lied last September, was the Countess loffredo Galli. an Italian, whom she met while he was consul to this city. Miss Myra Dick is another Philadelpliian who chose a Frenchman of title Tor n husband, and now as the MarTuise de Brevlaiere d'Alaimcourt she occupies a high place in the social life if her adopted country. Then there ire the Rareness von Frteaen who was formerly Miss Florence Smith, unci the Countess Georges Ginoux de Fermon, who was George Cochran's daughter. Miss Elizabeth Cochran. | The Count and Countess Traugott von Bethusey Hue live in mediaeval Btato near Breslau. Germany, and St will be recalled that their wedding ceremony was carried out with an elaborate regard for ancient family traditions. The countess was a Miss Reddellen of this city. Another of the leaders in the group of titled American women now dwelling in Paris is the Viscountess Jules Henri de Sibour. who is a dnughter of Charles W. Bailey, of 21st and He Lancey streets, and who takes an actlvo part in Parisian society. Mr. and Mrs. Alfred C. Harrison's daughter. Miss Mildred Harrison, is now the Countess von Holnstein, hut she and the count have spent most of the time since their wedding in this country. Still another Philadelphia woman of title who prefers to live in this country is the Countess Eulalla. the former Mrs. John B. Stetson. Her linmn Irlm nn thp Hid YnrU rr*n/l ic built in the likeness* of a French chateau. and is exceedingly beautiful. Some Other Noble Marriage*. Rodman VVanamaker's daughter. Miss Fernanda Wanamaker. was wedded In Paris a few years ago to Arturo de Heeren, who will inherit a title from his father. Another Phlladelphian who. although not bearing a title, Ik married to an English jurist whose position is a most important -, >. : ^ ,? i - HPm. yjr? J DE SIBOUR. Louise Bailey.) one In Cairo, is Mrs. Verr Speke-Al- ( ston, who was Miss Anne Chew, i i About her family home. Cliveden, in , i firrmantown, center many historic as- 1 sociations. I One of Rome's social leaders ami j i who, by reason of her exalted posi- j i tion, is frequently hostess to royalty, j 1 is Mrs. George W. Wurts, si sister of ! 1 Charlemagne Tower, while occupying much the same sort of a position in j ( Paris and at Diuard is Mrs. Hughes- ' j Hallett, the former Emily Schaum- | berg. BASK IN FORTUNE'S SMILES Sailors From Nev? Zealand Port Are j ] Reported to Have Made Rar; Find of Ambergris. In the old days, when the sturdy | men of New lledford and Nantucket put out to sea in chase of the mighty 1 whale, they used to dream of finding ambergris. A streak of fortune which | carried a 111 HI II nf this stufY across Ihn I bows of an old square-rigger might 1 make a small fortune for all hands, ; even to the lowest one in a hundred 1 laymen stowed away in the forecastle. I Hut the streak of fortune seldom ! came. However, the sperm whale continues to give us this concretion and the navigators of the far-off waters sometimes find it. The whaler Norvegia comes hooting into Christchurch, New Zealand, jubilant in the possession of ambergris to the amount of half a ton ?at least the cables to the newspapers say it's half a ton. Inasmuch as I 1 ambergris has seldom been discovered in quantities exceeding 100 pounds. ' the accuracy of the scales may perhaps be doubted. And here's another thing. The same i ] dispatches place the value of the am- j bergris at $300,000. That is a lot of ' money for a crew of hard-bitten whalemen, yet perhaps it would not i be grudged them by a world always , ready to applaud good fortune. Hut j armbergris is usunlly quoted at $5 the j ounce. What has caused this tremen 1 dous advance? A decline would seem \ more probable because the discovery of such a quantity might easily overstock the market. j It's a good yarn of deep-sea treas ure. Don't let's scoff at it. It seems ! fairly sort of a contribution to the | men of the Norvegia. and that the I men of the Norvegia are joyful there- I at. And iny lady's next bottle of su- . perior perfume from Parts may con tain, under the name of some sum- j i mer blossom, its share of the essence j ' which had its origin in the bleak ant arctic.?Hartford Times. Woman Rat Catcher. One of the earliest of oiTlcial rnt i ' catchers appears to have been a woman. An English warrant dated 1672 i announces that, "whereas, Elizabeth Wickley is employed in killing of ratts and other vermins. In and ubout His Ma'tn's Stores and Houses In ye Tower of London. I have therefore thought fit to allow her ye sum of eight ($40) pounds per annum." During the next I century the office was invested with . great dignity, and the "Gentleman's I Magazine" for 1741 recorded the appointment of Mr. Gower as rat killer , to his majesty, "a place of ?100 | (|600) a year, an honorable office." Apollo Is Dead Again; Over ; p IfTASHINGTON.?Apollo is dead , f ff again. And buried. His fu- gjio leral obsequies were in classic keepng with his standing as the hand- , somest god in the mythological output ^ ?though, incidentally, it was his 1 jan standing that caused his downfall? ind he now lies under the campus j ^ <rass of a gray stone col'.ego out mQ Brooklyn way, with spring blossoms >n his grave. QVt A tragedy, filtered through hearsay \ channels, is apt to be diluted in its ' mo 'acts, and watered as to poignant de- j scj, .ails, but even the weakened flavor the of the incident is worthy a sip, be- the muse Apollo is always interacting? tha 0 say nothing of pretty girls. tha The students gave a Latin play at 1 he college a little while ago, and the 1 statue of Apollo, on a pedestal, ser gleamed white and classic in oue cor- | the tier of the dramatic atmosphere. Ap- inn parently. he was as safe from harm ter is his original in the belvedere of the to Vatican museum, but you never can ligl tell! Most anything is liable to hap- / Worn-Out Flags Destroyed |lf ORN-Ol'T national flags used by | W the United States government in 00 the army and navy, on public buildings, etc., never become mere pieces of waste ragsp The government sets an example for the whole country by requiring that worn-out flags shall be burned. Whether or not any special regulation covers the disposition of | i old flags, the universal practice of the ' /army and navy whenever a flag is no r< c longer fit for service is that it shall ^ be destroyed. | When a Hug used at an army post or ret on a naval vessel is no longer service- soj able, requisition of the quartermaster (]rc is made for a new one and the old one j q is burned. The same disnosition i? ; ui made of flags from public buildings. so, Whether or not custodians of build- ' i)UI ings outside of Washington follow the an( official plan of destroying flags is not i 550 known. mu Flags borne in battle are invariably yat preserved, either by the commands pot which carried them, or under instruc- 1 ste lions by the war department, by the the government at Washington. A whole six roomful of battle flags is on exhibition the lit the war department, and it will be j ser Two "Bill" Murrays, Each W ^rrgr1' rllERE are two William Murrays in " the house of Representatives, and each one is known among familiars as "Hill" Murray. J One is "Alfalfa Hill" Murray of Oklahonia, and the other is "Hoston Hill" Murray from the Hub. Each one is ^ famous. tQ Now, the mail at the house of rep- >] resentatives post office these days is lo cluttered and jammed with letters from constituents, protesting, clamor- \yj Ing, arguing about some feature of the \yj tnrifY Tho rifiutnl fibrilc 11 linr/l ? time getting the letters for the two str, Murrays separated, and Alfalfa Hill was getting a lot of Boston Bill's bet mail, and yice versa. tbc Finally the postmaster hit upon the for How Townsend Interviewet Representative townsend ; of Michigan, author of "Chimmie Madden," served his apprenticeship on 1 i New York newspaper. Mr. Town- j < tend sayH that it was hearing a newsle ' k say, "Aw, wat t'ell," that gave him the A nspiration for "Chimmie Fadden." ^ With much relish the New York 1 Oiigressman told a group of newspaper men at the Press club about his -= Irst assignment. "The city editor called me and told ne to go to William K Vanderbilt's ^ louse and get an interview. With a i ? ' tulp In my throat I listened as he 111 ' asped out the questions 1 was to ask ai|' he New York millionaire. "Somehow or other I finally found nyself nt the door of the Vanderbllt ; nansion, and in a cold perspiration *ke *ang the bell. A tall, dignified man. I or with great English sldewhiskers aa'< ipened the door. > [ " " 'Oood evening," Idr. Vanderbilt,' I but ( ^v. / OSS IP ggON zeal Was the Cause t in the danger zone of an amateur 'he tragedy, according to the hearversion. was caused by a studentyer whose overzeal to voice her re of dead language with a full a>ance of histronic emphasis led her butt into Apollo's pedestal. And body who lius ever owned a tue on a pedestal can guess the ifter the play the students decided t having "killed" Apollo they mid bury him In state. So they de themselves into a procession white-robed mourners. They chantu dirge. And they carried gards of woody blossoms. And after handsomest of the 12 great godeI been interred with rust-right cerenies under the campus grass theite-robed ones scattered flowers* r him and chanted some more. Vhe - the rites were ended and the urners had got back to their oolgirl selves they chipped in with lir pocket allowance to pay for 1 statue they had broken. And t's all there was to it, except t? f Apollo could have had a say In* matter he would doubtless obve that he would rather be under ! college campus with flocks of ocently joyous schoolgirls to scatflowers over his smashed bits than, stand, a perfect whole, in the spot:?t of the Vatican'p belvidere. tnybody would. by the Government ailed that one of the most striking the mural paintings which decorate statehouse at Hoston depicts the urn of the battle flags by the Union diers in 1SG5 to Gov. John A. Antw. The flag-making plant of the navy is the Itrooklyn navy yard, where lie HO women are employed. The nting comes from Massachusetts, 1 every case costs the government 10, or $11.25 a roll. Every piece st weight live pounds to every 40 ds and stand a weight test of 70 mds to two pquare Inches. It is eped in salt water for six hours and tn exposed to the sun for another hours. If strength and color hold i fabric is then pronounced fit for vir>r> 'ith the "Hon." Prefix n of sending ull mail postmarked rn Oklahoma to Alfalfa Bill Mur , and all Massachusetts mail to' ston Bill Murray, and to take a ince on any scattering stuff. I'he other day a letter arrived ad ssed to "lion. William Murray," 1 it bore a postmark from a town Oklahoma, It was sent to Alfalfa l. and when ho opened it he saw was meant for his Boston friend. I happened to be written by a for- | r Bostonese who had moved to lahotua. i tlfalfa Bill sent tl?e letter to Bosi Bill in one of his new envelopes, rked for Mr. Murray of Massachuts. but simply because'the letter e Alfalfa Bill's frank, back It eamo the Oklahoma Muray. rhen Alfalfa Bill went personally his Boston namesake. Ixtok here." he said, "my name is iliam II. and yours is William F. ty not inform our constituents of difficulty and get these thipgs. aight ?" No," said Boston Bill, "I have a ter plan. I'll take credit for all i good things you do and blame you. all the bad things I do." \ \AV rr? U 1/ J will. r\. vailUUIUMl 3^S| w*at M fffyy ^ YOU DO ^ ;an. '1 camp ujt from the newspaperce to ask you what you woutd do ?ase we declared war with Canada.' I 1 continued with the questions ich the city editor had hurled at me. Looking me straight in the eye, Ich only added to my discomfiture, man waited until I had somehow other faltered through. Then he I. frigidly: 'Mr. Vanderbllt is hout. Hi'm the ler. (iood night!"