University of South Carolina Libraries
THE FORT IWIll TIMES hiWltfcii Evsry Thursday. F?RT MILL, ??UTM CAROLINA. But baseball Is such a strain on the olce! Thunder and lightning! 8eems rather familiar. "Swat the fly." Yes, swat It way out Into the outfield. ADout ttie only croaking one hear* these days is done by tbe frogs. Many persons do not like the cabaret. preferring to know what they eat. St. Louis boy swallowed a whole crawfish. Fortunately, it wasn'C an eel. Tombstone cutters are on strike? an added argument for the lower cost of decease. About this time, the preliminary step is taken in the formation of June brides. Only two per cent, of musicians are bald, but it is too late for many men to join a band. As soon as all women wear fend era on their hntplns tho men can quit carrying nippers. ____________ The farmer ought to be a liappy man about these times. Everybody wants to help him. Our opinion is that the world will survive despite incomprehensible pictures and slit Bklrts. However, the kind of umbrella that you cannot lose is not much good for keeping out tho rain. One trouble with simplified spelling is that the authorities still fool Ishly insist upon regular rules. ExpertB tell us how to achieve a ripe old age, when what ono wants Is to retain one's verdant youth. ? While adopting those dinky little hats tho dear women cling obstinately to tho old long range hntpins. There Is a peculiar fascination In tho accoutrements of angling now displayed In certain shop windows. Some persons do not like the pleasant chorus of the frogs, but some persons have no music In their souls. A German hanking house has fnlled and Its chiefs have fled. The examiner over there has a fierce mustache. A German banker named Puppe has fled, leaving debts of $7,500,000. Sort of going to the dogs, so to Bpeak. For the cure of cancer $2,500 worth of radium was applied. At this rate few people will bo able to afford to have one. Have you heard the wall of those who are humiliated TlPCause tho luxury of paying an income tax Is denied them? Is the wearing of a green hat with a neat little bow in the rear an Indication that the wearer possesses temperament? A noston chiropodist has been ar rested for bigamy. Possibly he has been throwing himself at tho feet of too many women. Then there is thnt morbid form of self-conceit that lends a man to conaider himself n hoodoo bemuse tho homo team always loses when he attends a ball gnmo. Climbing 200 steps nfter breakfast took superfluous weight from a woman. It probably- would have the same efTeet upon a horse. The fact thnt somo women can bo Induced to resent bitterly the charge of being too well dressed shows thnt feminism Is mnrching. And nfter it has taken us all these long years to learn to spell, why inflict misery through being compelled to learn all over ngain? Ilnschall becomes more scientific every year Expert fans now have telephone calls arranged In advance to summon tliem rrom their work. Only one child was born (o every thirty families in Paris last year, which city would not be a desirable place for a baby carriage factory. That Seattle Judge who made n prospective bride and bridegroom listen while he tried a divorce cnsc certainly doesn't cater to the marrying trade. Influences of the season nre shown to be affecting our courts, one head line chronicling the fact that a "juror was taken out of the box." A man's throat was cut In a bar ber-shop when a bomb exploded. He complained bitterly because he was not having his shoes shined. On the latest and greatest steamship just launched there are lifeboats for 5,260 persons. Still, the proper thing for a ship to do with lifeboats It not to need them. 0 GENTLE ADA FERRIS John Folsom's Mascot Saved Him Just in the Nick of Time. When Folsom was sent to the Philippines he told Miss Ferris that he would have something very important to write to her as soon as he had es tabllflhed himself. It was something which he could not say to her then because Ada Ferris was rich and Folsom had his way to make in the world. But when he looked into her eyes he knew that she would wait?that she was the kind that would wait years?perhaps for ever. It was lonely In Manila, in spite of men friends who took ono out to dinner and whom one entertained at one's bachelor quarters. In fact John Folsom had only one real friend?Minnie, his little monkey, who had been captured, a tiny baby, in the forests of Mindanao. She was the tiniest and most affectionate creature that he had ever seen. One day he found her perched gravely in front of Ada FerrlB' photograph, examining it, evidently with approval, for she made a little chattering noise that signified happiness. "Some day, Minnie," said FolBom, as Bhe snuggled into his coat, "some day we three will bo in a world of perfect happiness." Then ho sighed, for he had not written to Ada Ferris so regularly as he had been uaed to do. Perhaps It waa because his promotion came slowly. It could not havo been because of Lilith Aintree, Judge Aintrec's daughter, I Held It Toward Him. who was tho belle of the American colony, and who distinctly liked Folsom. There could not have been a greater contfast than between Lilith and Ada; the one proud, mirth-loving, selfwilled; the other gentle, sweet and afj fectlonate. In his heart Folsom knew that his now flame could not compare with the girl whom he had left behind him in Boston. But Ada P\?rris was far away and L.illth was near, and in his loneliness ho found it Impossible j to resist her overpowering attraction, hnr . noroft?oll*ir -- ? --a* I MV* - |/ui ouuatu; , Viuiaill W1VII yuuin, and his, ho know, an soon as he should Bny the word that would make her his. Minnie did not like Lilith Alntree. ; There had never been any love lost be, tween them. The very llrst time that i Lilith and her mother called at his bachelor quarters?1 think he was giving a tea that day?the little creature ran screaming from her and, climbing tho curtain pole, sat at that safe elevation and mowed and grinned at her. "Minnie doesn't seem to like me," said Lilith one day. "Don't you think you ought to get rid of her, John?" (They called ench other by their first names now.) "I mean?" She paused in well calculated confusion. John knew what she meant. They had been strolling along the water front together and he had never felt her Influence so strongly us that day. Rut at the words a sudden chill fell upon him and before his eyes there rose the gentle image of Ada Ferris, waiting. Her letter never altered in tone, except that they had become a little more reserved, a littlo more distant, in response to the unconscious change in his. And ever ho halted between | in a iv?w limn, IIUW ICKOIUieiV IlllUUUI 1 to Ada and now overpowered by the exotic allurement of Judge Aintreo's daughter. The old life seemed very far nway now. The new life was pleasant and alluring. Ho had been taken up by the colony; everybody believed that bo and Llllth were engaged. Ho must make his decision. The day of his decision came. It was a perfect afternoon in tho season of rains. John Folsom, his little companion perched on his shoulder, was seated in a swinging chair in Judge Aintreo's garden. He had brought i Minnie with him becnuso she whim! percd so when he left her, and because ho felt, somehow, that sho was a talisman to hltn. Deep in his heart he knew that Lillth would never bring him happiness, but her presence drove reason from his brain and deadened his heart against all memories of the girl back east. Ldltth was seated in tho hammock under tho tree, and all the other guests had discreetly withdrawn to. a distant*. She had'meant to capture him that day and never had she looked more captivating. She was dressed all in white, her little feet. In their neatly fitting shoes, swung to and fro with the motion of the hammock. Over her mr L 1 head she carried a white parasol. John i Folsom looked at her and the spell was on hltn. He came to her side. "Llllth." he began hoarsely, taking her hand. "I?I?" He choked; he could not contlnun. On hi? ihnntHap one arm about his neck, Minnie was muttering and acoiding. She meant 1 to warn him, but John was past warning now. Just then he heard the judge calling him. "Folsom, come here!" he yelled. "Come and get some iced lemonade for Lillth and yourself!" He hurried < away, glad of the respite, glad to com- i pose himself. He must be articulate, ] he must be clear-headed, for he had to i tell Lilith about Ada. ] And yet he knew she would not care. She would have no scruples ] about usurping the other's place. I To his surprise the monkey left his shoulder and sprang to the lowest | branch of the tree under which the i hammock hung. Folsom hurried away | and presently, coming back with the lemonade, saw something which as- j tounded him. Lilitb, in an access of fury, had reached up and grasped the monkey, and now, holding her fast by the throat with one hand, was thrashing her with the other. The little animal was nearly choked, she could not scream, but, with both hands over her head, strove vainly to ward off that shower of stun- ; ning blows. Then Folsom came up t as Lilith flung the creature from her. | Minnie crept sobbing into John's arms. He turned and faced the girl ' who, disheveled and flushed with passion, stood gazing nt him uneasily. "I thrashed the little beast," Bhe : said. "What did she do to you?" asked John quietly. "She sat on the tree and made faces ; at me," Lilith answered petulantly. "And 1 tell you, John, unless you get ! rid of the beast you must?" !?.. -1 ^ *- ? diiu imu iiit'iiiii 10 Bay " get rid or mo," but (something in John's face checked her. "I'm sorry if I hurt her, John." she said. "Hut the llttlo wretch hates me ; and I can't hear to be hated. I want to be loved, John," uhe added, lifting her face toward his. A sudden loathing for her came with hiB new understanding. "Ltlith," he said, "a woman whe would beat a helpless dumb brute would beat a child." "What do you mean?" she cried. But he said no more. Holding the monkey tightly to him ho walked away. And Lillth knew. She knew that the mother instinct, which alone can hold a man, had failed her; she knew that she had lrretrivably lost him. He had found her out at laBt. "Little maBcot," said John, when he set Minnie down upon his * table, ' "there's a long letter from some one in Boston that we haven't answered yet. Shall we write to her this afternoon?" And Minnie picked up his pen just at that moment and held it toward him. (Copyright, 1913, by W. Q. Chapman.) SECRET OF NATURE FOUND i Fact That It Is Possible to "Taste" Electricity Has Been But Recently Divulged. In some forms electricity is Invisible, while in others it may be seen, i The lightning flash and the electric | light are easily seen, but the current itself is really invisible to the eye. The sonso of feeling can detect the presence of the mysterious element, ! and the sense of hearing may detect u, una me sense of smell bus been known to locate the presence of the wonderful power, but It has Just been ; discovered that we may tasto electricity. Metals of an opposite nature will, when properly connected, throw off a small current of electricity, and thie may be tasted by taking a piece of bright, clean tin about the size of a silver dollar, and placing either ubove ? tho tongue or beneath It, with a silver dollar on the opposite side. Keep tho outer edges of the silver and tin apart for a moment, and see if you can detect any taste. Then bring tho outer edges of the metals together with one above and tho other beneath the tongue, and instantly there will be a sour taste in tho mouth. This is actually tasting the electric current that is produced by \ tho contact of the two metale. and which in making tho circuit is passing through the tongue which la very sen- ! sltlve. Ambulance Miniature Hospital. The new French Schneider ambu- ; lance is a veritable portable hospital, j being a truck probably the largest size yet constructed and having an operating room in the middle part, with two smaller rooms at the ends. It contains an electric plant which is used for lighting, water pumping and J sterilizing, and for surgical motors. Water Is pumped in l>y hoso from a well or pond, and, after passing ' through tho ultra-violet ray sterilizer, it is stored in a tank. When the ambulance Is brought to the spot, for instance, on a battlefield, a wing in tho shape of a tent is formed by a . tarpaulin on each side of the wngon, ! and the two tents are electrically | lighted through windows in the sides of tho car. Many Years on One Job. For continuous service on one Job, Councilman Henry Glace of Mauch Chunk, Pa., thinks he is entitled to first place. Mr. Glace entered the service of the Lehigh Valley Railroad company, at the Packerton car shops. In September, 1874, more than thirtyeight years ago. He was then put to work on the bolt machine and he haa been at that particular work aver since. VIRGINIA DOG BROKE UP A SWELL WEDDING t Animal Attacks Usher He Found Wearing His Master's Dress Suit Cape Charles, Va.?A big dog caused a panic among the wedding party and the guests at the marriage of Harry Roberts and Miss Mabel Hemming, a daughter of the Rev. Ernest Hemming, at Eastvllle, recently. The animal dashed up the aisle behind the wedding party, proceeding to the altar, and sprang upon the back of Arthur Addison, one of the ushers, grabbed the coat he was wearing between its teeth and tried to tear the garment from the man's back. Many of the women guests rushed from the church, believing the dog was suffering from rabies. The" cere | ^ALr-rm H3 I Tried to Tea* the Garment From the Man's Back. mony was halted until the animal was put out. It appears that the dress suit worn by the usher had been borrowed from the doc's master,' C. T. Cobb. The animal wandered Into Its master's room, and, taking a scent of the missing clothing, following it into the church and made the attack. GOOD LOOKS WINS ACQUITTAL Women Jurors Refuse to Convict Prisoner Regarded as' Too Handsome to Steal Horse. Redwood City. Cal.?"He's really far too handsome a man to be a horse thief." "Still, he admits stealing the horse." "I don't care. No man with such heavenly eyes should be put in prison. We must acquit him." And so they did. Briefly this Is the synopsis of what happened behind the doors of the jury room when ten good men and true, In company with two women, said to possess the same attributes, were considering the case of ITgo Diando, charged with horse stealing SherifT J. II. Mansfield, who has heen Diando's custodian for three weeks, admits that his prisoner is the most handsome that ever ornamented the San Mateo county Jail, and when two women were drawn to serve on the llirv before whh-h the rnoe won tried by Judge Puck was heard to express substantial doubts regarding? the conviction of this man. who had previously admitted his guilt, but pleadpd "not guilty." The foreman of the Jury was Mrs. Alma A. Monroe of I.omita Park, and Mrs. Violet L. Fine of Daly City was the other woman. Notwithstanding the fact thnt Diando's testimony at his preliminary hearing, in which he admitted stealing the horse, was introduced as evidence, the jury, after being out twenty minutes, returned a verdict of not guilty. QUICK ACTION IN ACCIDENTS California Woman Breaks Foot, Arm, and Leg After Dropping Soup Tureen. Pasadena. Oal.?Miss Belle Sams of this city was the victim of a peculiar series of accidents the other day, all occurring within a counlo of sernnria While washing dishes Miss Sams dropped a soup tureen on her foot, breaking one of the bones. She put out an arm to save herself from falling, and struck the edge of tho kitchen sink so violently that the arm was broken. Collapsing In a faint, the young woman fell to the floor in such a manner that one of her legs was twisted under her and broken. Had Their Nerve. Munich.?Thirty-three girls of the municipal cooking school were made seriously sick by eating a "'.r'al stew" of their own concoction. Remarkable Record. Ix>ndon.?Sir Thomas Dewar killed four running cheetahs In threo minutes, which sportsmen consider a remarkable record, cheetahs being greaf sprinters. Selling Bonds Now. New York?Rev. Joseph Lambert, the Providence minister, who married Col. J. J. Astor and Madeline Force, ta now selling bonds for a ltvlna. iiiis t f / \ 151 Handling of White. Hous WASHINGTON.?Silent, smooth, efficient is the business force in the office of the nation's chief executive at the White House. The total business staff, including ushers, messengers and so on, numbers little more than 40. And the modest one-story office annex to the White House does nqt represent more than a fraction of the floor space occupied by many a large corporation. Handling the White House mail is one of the heaviest responsibilities of the business done there. It is doubtful if there is any other place where the incoming mail varies so tremendously from day to day. In addition, there is a rule that every letter addressed to the president shall be acknowledged from the Whito House, | even though it is referred to some govi ernment department. Moreover, there is a rule also to the efTect that every letter received must bo answered within 24 hours unless j exceptional circumstances make this ; impossible. This policy of promptness taxes the resources of the White House business establishment when, as sometimes happens, the daily receipts jump Mann Said He Knew Wh JAMES R. MANN of Illinois, Republican leader in the house, bears the i reputation of knowinc more than nnv \ other man in the houso about the legislation before that body. He has also a well established reputation for being ready and able to talk on any subject at any time. In the midst of one of tbe long night sessions near the cloBe of the last congress some one proposed that tho "private calendar" should be I taken up, and that minor bills pending should be passed under suspension of the rules. "I object!" shouted one member. "No man in the house knows what these different bills are!" Mr. Mann, who was standing, ed into his desk and pulled out two big bundles. Holding them up, he said: "Here are all the bills on the prl| vate calendar, and all the reports on those bills. I've read them all, and I know what each one means!" Heforo the congress ended, Mr ; Mane's colleagues in the house pre, sented him with a costly watch, the presentation speech being made by | "Uncle Joe" Cunnon, and seconded by Speaker Clark. Horseless Age Near, Is {{j EXTECT to live to see tho day 1 when tho keeping of horses in Washington will be prohibited on sanitary grounds. Just as the keeping of pigs has been and the keeping of cows greatly restricted." This is a statement made by C. G. Bell, one of the experts of tho department of agriculture. Mr. Bell believes that Washington is a much cleaner city because of the introduction of automobiles, and that the tendencies of the day is to eliminate horses in cities and restrict them to the country. According to figures published by I the department of agriculture, horse breeding is about the worst paying business that any one c?#n go into. In' quirics were seut to 10,000 cor'respoudents and the average for the cost of She Thought "Ze House | .1 SPEIGHT, clerk to the house committee on judiciary, is not at ull the serious young man that any oue would take him to be. Not at all. In splto of the fact that Speight sits in that largo and impressivo committee room, which probably is worth more : money than all the halls the continental congresses ever dreamed of. and in splto of the fact that ho is 1 steeped in tho lore of trust investlga! tions, Judicial secrets, possible con' atitutlonal amendments, impeachment trials and Alabama politics, Mr. Speight is always ready with a nifty little yarn. He says that one day the house of representatives was in & terrifllc uproar. Progressives were hurling Bolid masses of objurgations against the reactionaries Representative Cooper of Wisconsin, who refuses to go into caucus with any one, not excepting himself, was hurling defiance at Cannonism from the rear line of trenches, while ever and anon Representative Mondell would chirp feebly In reply. w. ~~ I fCSTRDW^ B(Q)SSD0> ^e^Wail~ls Gigantic^(aslT to 1,000 letter* or more, oft** note. It 1b only fair to say, bow<- |r. that such circumstances are except) fu'J, although many newspaper real< u .iave been led to believe that the p; t si dent received at leaBt 1,000 letter o\ try day of his occupancy of the office Kb a matter of fact, there are we^l.# at a stretch when, under normal con ulons, the dally mall will seldom exc< ,-d 200 letters and the average for iohg Intervals during the last administration was In the neighborhood of 350 letters a day. Hut this normal volume map be quickly changed to the abnormal The appearanec of some new natlo* ul Issue, an international crisis, an It iportant declaration of policy by the :>rest: dent, a proposal of new legislati n. or ; any one of a number of turns of affairs | is likely to bring down upon the \Thlte | House an avalanche of letter or ln' qulry, advice, commendation andlwit{ ticlsm. 1 Tlie president of the United Saates subscribes in effect to the policy otj the man who has no mail delivered by carrier at his place of business, but instead rents a lockbox at the local postI office or nearest postal station. No ' mall is delivered by regular cat n. r at the White House. In fact, the president has his own special postmar , a { member of tho messenger force at the I executive offices, who is pi ?vided v itb a horse and buggy and \y.b<: makes 1 wo i or three trips daily to the "Washing on postoffice dispatching tfca outgo ng . mail and returning with the incoml ig at All the Bills Mean^^| "It gives mo great pie sure." sald^B^f "Uncle Joe," amid the laughter of the^^^H house, "to present you with a 6t ;>B B watch." _ - Jl B During one of the lively debates IB incar tue end of the session a con- ^^Bj *troversy arose as to whc> was "enti- ^^B tied to the floor." Speaker Clark B^| tried to straighten it out, and in the ^^B midst of the discussion Represent*tive Moore of Pennsylvania inter- ^^B rupted: "Is not tlx,' present pi rllamentary situation this, that tin gentleman from BH Chicago (Mr. Mann) has been caught |^B asleep at the switch?" BH "The chair is not go.ng to rule |^B that the gentleman from Chicago ever got caught asleep at the switch," re- BH plied Speaker Clarli. B the View of experts H raising a colt to three ybars old was taken for the entire country. |H Counting the service fee, feed, veterinary bills and breaking, the cost of raising a colt to three yei.rs old, even when* making allowance lor the farm work lie does up to that age, is $96.54. The Belling price averages $136.17. This is making no allowanco for the H marcs that do not produce foals or V for those that die prior to three years V old. Officials of the division of animal I husbandry who are co-operating with V the array in raising remounts for the cavalry, say that the only hopeful thing shown by these ligures is that tlio government free service and theprlce of $150 paid by the army for three-year-olds helps out the average somewhat. Mr. Hell in discussing the matter said: "While I think the government offer for army remounts is as fair as could be made under the circumstances, I certainly should not adviso > any ono to go out and buy a lot of mares for the purpose of raising horses and selling them. There isno question that the automobile ishurting the horse business." Zey Tek Things So Calm" I I The speaker's gavel was tattooing vol- H {leys of protest and tho intrepid Mann of Illinois was upsetting all hopes by Hi his constant objections. There was a HI | din that gave one a headache. A French woman was In one of the gal* ^H leries, the guest of some member of the Judiciary committee, and Mr. ^H | Speight was showlug her around, and at tho particular moment when the j^H noise was at Its height in the bouse she turned to her guide and said: flH "Ah, Meester Speight, you have rea- I H son to be proud of ze house! I* I I France /.ey are so boisterous. Here in ze bouse zey tek teengs so calm." ^HH