The herald and news. (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, December 10, 1909, Page EIGHT, Image 8
WAYS OF THEIR HUSBANDS.
Three Wives Discuss the Kinkinesc
of Mankind.
News and Courier.
After the servant problem ha<
been disposed' of the women at th<
unc4heoi party begau to discuss hus
bands.
"My husband,'' purred the littl(
woman with the subdued voice, "is
I believe. the stormiest bluffer nov
lving on the globe. My, what a Io
of noise he makes, what a lot of
perfectly good breath he wastes, witl
his bluffs!
"Let me illustrate. You know m)
black maid. Viola? I've had Viol
for tw) years. She's a splendit
worker. u never had a single faul1
O find with Viola until election day
Viola failed to appear oua electior
day.
"Well. you should have Ilearnd m1V
husanl beILow when Viola didn
appear. While I was getting' break.
fast he burst into the kitchen.
' iere's that woman?' he de
failJed hoarsely, and his hair waE
all tousled up and he looked really
'Viola?! I said. 'Why. Viola
ias% come this moniing.
" 'She hasn't' he roared. 'She
*iasn't come? What the dickens is
.he matter that she hasn't come?'
" 'Really, I haven't the slightest
idea,' I said, trying to be soothing
'Probably she is sick.'
" 'Sick nothing!' he bawled.
Don't you dare tell me she is sick!
I refase to belieeve anything of the
kind. She was probably kiting
around San Juan Hill aH night, dane
ing her head off and hitting up the
gin and all like that-that's what
she was doing.'
'Viola,' I said dignifiedly, 'is a
settled woman. She doesn 't dance
and she doesn't drink. Be reason
able.'
" 'There you go, making excuses
for 'em!'-he shouted. 'Letting 'em
walk all over you! Well, they won't
-walk over me, I -tell you that! Not
much! When she shows up you pay
her and fire her; understand?'
"Viola came on time the next
*owning. Her face was battered. She
was crying whein she came in. I
smuggled her quietly into the kitch
en and asked her about things.
* "Really, it was too bad. Her
husband had beat her for the first
time in their married life of fourteen
years.. Her husband is a truckman,
and a hard working man, but he'd
got overfilled with election joy on
nhe nmght before election and had
*etme home and beaten her, and then
es pawned her best pair of shoes
fo' two bits,' as she told me, and
after that he 'd been arrested, and
he'd probably be sent to the islands,
* because he had no money to pay his
tine, and, of course, he'd lose his
trucking job, and
"Well then Viola broke down
*quite badly and I felt very sorry
for her. Bat my husband heard her
erying. He called me.
" 'What 's all that noise going on
out there in the kitchen?' he de
manded of me when I went to his
room.
"I told him all about it.
" 'Huh! fine eock 'and bull yarn!'
he grunted. 'Of course you believe
all of that junk they tell you. Her
man hoeked up her shoes for a quar
ter, 'hey? H 'in. Who's got the tiek
'Viola has it,' I replied. 'She
showed it to me.'
"'Darned pretty note,' he growl
ed savagely. 'He ought to be strung
uby 1-he thumbs! Huh! Hard work
ing man, is he ? Well, I haven't a
particle of use or sympathy for peo
ple like that, but I'm not going to
have any woman around my place
without any decent shoes to wear.
Soon's breakfast's over you give her
the money and send her out to get
her shoes out o' hock. Where's this
loafer of a husband of hers now?t'
" 'He'll be taken to Jefferson Mar
ket Court this morning, Viola says
-she :was just around at the police
station and saw him,' I told him.I
"'Well, he ought to get about
ninety years in prison, darn him!'
he mumbled as he pulled on his
shoes. 'Drives a truck, hey ? AndJ
he'll lose his job, will he? Well, he
ought to lose it ! What police station
ts he in?'
"The one down on 33rd street,.
Viola told me," I replied,
"He huh'd and mattered a lot:
more, and then he came into the din
ing room and gulped his breakfast 2
without a word and started for the i
office hal.f an hour earlier than i
usual. About twenty minutes after]
l'e left he called me up on the
'phone. I
'''Now. see here.' he bellowed at
me over the 'phone. 'I've got that
scoundrel of a husband of Viola's1
out, and bought him a drink and
eome breakfast and he's gone back
SCEN'E IN HOUSE OF 1,000 CAN
DAY, DECE
to his job, but I want you to under
tId one thing-never again! Not
ure! I won' tolerate such
busiiiess.! Not much! You tell Vi
wa that her man's out of jail and
ou tie job again, and at the same
t1:ne you want to give her fair and
square warning that-' but he was
so terrifically in earnest about the
rest of it that I couldn 't make out a
Vor,d that he said. g
"Did you ever hear of such a bluf
fer in all your born Jays, as my hus
band is?"
"Oh, they 're all like that," put.
in the woman with the prematurely
gray hair and the fresh young face.
"I think it is because they are just
crazy over the sound of their voices.
The only way is to let 'em shout and
bellow and roar and then go right a
head and do what' you've been in
tending to 'do right :long. They
must let off steam, you know, the
poor, blustery creatures.
"A few Sundays ago the ice
cream didn't come in time :or din
ner. My husband made an awful fuss
about it, and when the boy did bring
the ice cream,~ about an houi after
we'd finished dinner, he rounded ..on
the lad something awful. Asked him
what the something or other he meant
by loafing on his job that way, and
threatened to have him fired and all
that, and finally the ice cream boy
broke down and began to dash at his
eyes with his cap.
" 'Me brudider was pinched las'
night, the boy mumbled through his
sobs, and I been spendin' most o'
me time al day tryin' t' spring him.'
" 'To spring him' my husbandi
demanded of the lad. 'What do you I
mean by springing him?'
''T' git him out,' said the iceb
eream boy, still wiping away at hist
eyes with his poor old cap. 'I been
t' see McGolligan,' naming the dis
tict leader, only that isn't the dis
trict leader's name, 'an' McGooligan
he trun me. He wouldn't do nuttin' r~
(' spring me brudder. Au' he'll have
to do his bit.'e
"'Tell that to Sweeney!' said my
husband, who becomes terribly slangye
wuen he is angry, but then he Ibegan :t
to ask the ice cream boy questions c
and presently he had the story. It
"'The lad's brother had been i2 a a
stone fight 'wit' his gang' the night
before and had been one of the vic- 1
Urns when the policemen made their b
swoop. The brother was 'a kid wot a
alwus woiked,' and his arrest would v
be ahi ard blow on the 'mudder,' who I
hadu 't yet been told anything about
it.
" 'That 's a swell bunach of hum
bugs,' my husband growled at the t
boy. 'Here, you sit down here in
the ki-tchen and I'll find out about -t
this. If you've been trying to string' t
me I'll come pretty near dancing t
you in a way that you won't like,' d
and then he went to the telephone 1
and called up McGooligan, the dis-o
trict leader.
"McGooligan told him to wait aa
miaute while he called up the police j
station, and presently the district a
leader called up my husband again.
Then my husband shot back to the t.
kitchen where the dismal looking:
ice cream boy still sat wiping away tj
at his eyes with his cap. g
" 'Here, yo ,' my husband said to a
the boy, 'tha - kid brother of yours f,
tras been turned loose and is on his h
wvay home. Now, you beat it and n
~et on the job again, understand? I n
wvon 't have you fired for fetching si
n.e a mess of ice cream fifteen or s<
wenty hours late this time, but if k
rou ever pull anything like that on
ne again--and the rest of it was u
;omewhat inarticulate. it
"Whenever he gets caught in the
ret of doing something real nice and~
:ind he always talks all the louder
ind with an additonal imitation of y
vrath in order to make out that his
>ositon has been right from the be- f~
~inning and that he hasn't receded
fraction of an inch from it. And E
he pathetic part of it. is that the
oor rideulous things' never know k
towv a.bsurd they are, do they? B
"Last spring,'' put in another of
he women,"'we lost a whole two
reeks washing because scarlet fever
iroke ou: among the grandchildren mi
af Maggie, the washerwoman we've
3..
DLES, OERA HOUSE, THURS
MBER, 16TH.
gie's daughter, with the children,
lived with her, and when the disease
broke out the house was quarantined
and my fine -tivo weeks wash was
fumigated, of course. and ruined in
the process, and we wouldn't have
taken it back anyway; and it was a
dreadful calamity, too, for it just
happened that I'd put a lot of my
trousseau things that I'd kept packed
away-saving them for years-into
the wash that week; and there was
the whole wash a complete loss!
"Really, it makes me shudder even
,to think of the way my husband car
ried on when he heard about it. Mag
gie told me about it over the tele
phone and I could hear. her crying
as she old me.
"My husband was perfectly un
reasonable. He roared at me for
not knowing that Maggie's grand
children were going to have scarlet
.fever, roared at me for not having
fired Maggie years and years ago on
general principles, despite her ex
cllence as a laundress; shouted at me
for having put my trousseau things
in the wash instead of sending them
to the laundry and just went on
something frightful.
"I told him that it was a thing
that couldn't be helped, and that
really I hated to lose Maggie as a
washerwoman after having had her
so long.
" 'Look a-here, d'ye mean to stand
and tell me that you'd have that
that robberess again to do your
-lothes-and my clothes, too? Never
Eorget that I've got to wear some of
;he washing! D'ye mean to tell me
:hat you'd have her back again af-J
:er the deal she's handed out to us?'
"I told him as soothilgl3 as I
~ould that really Maggie hadn't been
o blame; that on the contrary, she
iad been the victim of exceedingly
~ad luck. He only emitted hoarse
ioises in his throat when I tried to
>ut the mattei- in that light and
ushed out to his lodge meeting.
"About six weeks later Maggie
alled on me one afternoon. The
>oor old thing looked very disheart
ned and miserable. She didn't ask
o be given our washing again; she
nly came to see me and to explain
hings. But I gave her the washing
11 the same.
"I told my husband when he got
ome that evening that Maggie had
een to see me, but I didn't mention
nything about having given her the
7ashing again. I told him how bad
y she looked and all that.P
"'D'je give her the washing? he
sked me. I
" 'After what you said about1
hat?' I. replied non-committally.
" -'Well, I'm -ashamed of you,
hat's what I am,' he said to me in1
hat more in sorrow than in anger*
one that men know how to use. 'I
.idn't think it of you; on the level
didn 't. A poor old granny of a
roman that's been- working for you
or a hundred years or so and with
hull flock of grandchildren, and
ust because the kids happen to get
little something the matter with
em, why, you-oh, shucks, I didn 't
hink it of you, honest.'.:
'What do you suppose happened(
den? Why, I told him that I had
iven Maggie the washing after all,3
nd -didn't he jaw and fuss at me*
>r having done it without asking t
im first Yes, he did, but he didn't
iean it, of course. It was only his
a.y-the man 's way-of trying to
luare himself for having* done
ymet'hing nice. Now, aren 't men the!
inky ones?''
It was unanimously agreed that
Len were and that seemed to settle
No Pathetic Ballads.
The Model-How is .that friend of
>urs who went to study in Paris?
The Artist--Oh, he 's getting on
iously.
The Model--How do you know?.
ave you heard from him?
The Artist-No, that's how I 5
aow he's doing well.-Illustrated 3
its.
Only Once.
"'How often. does your car kill a
an?''
"Only once. guv-ner!'' replied the
l notber I
About
What is confidtnce?
Confidence is the greatest as!
Confidence is confiding, trus
is such a:surance that leads to
Confidence is lost in merchai
claims anLd promnises and then <
That is just why there are !
why a g:eat many people lose
get what is adver,ised or receii
When a merchant has betra:
placzd in him, he m.ght as we]
when it comes to doing busim
C. C. Cooper's highest aim
dence in his business, and in h
has been attested by the hundr<
during the Sweeping Sale whi
for thirteen days. Every arti
fore the public, the entire stoc
tions. Each half hour sale, e,
vertised, every claim is being
There are eight days left of
be exceedingly busy ones, as t
every day. We are expecting
benefited in many ways.
In closing this little talk wi
ever striving and is doing all i
dence which you have placed-i
makes a statement, and advert
rest assured that it is a genuin,
vertises. We thank you.
C
Consolidated Salvage and Sale!
New York, in charge of entire
This sale closes Satur
LOST.
Notice is hereby given that a cer-I
Ificate for te-n (10) shares of ighe I
cpital stock of the Farmers Oil Mill,I
in my name, has been lost or mis-f
laeed, and application will be made
othe Company for a new certificate
fstock.E
J. R. Perdew. ______
11-30-094t..
hedu1es Effective June 20t,h, 1909.
iorthbound Departures from New
berry, LS. I
8:57 a. in., No. 15, daily, for A.nder
in, Greenville and intermediate
>ints connecting at Greenville for
tlnta and points North. Arrive at
ndrson 12:24 noon, Greenville 1:15
2:48 p. in., No. 11, daily, to Ander
on, Greeziville and intermediate Exa
inta, connecting at Greenville for
tlanta and points north. Arrive An
esoni 6:14 p. m.,Greenville 6:55 p m.
Southbound.
1:40 p. in., No. 18, daily, for Co
mbia, Charleston, Augusta and in- .
rmediate points. Arrive Columbia, flC
25 p. m. Charleston 8:45 p. mn. Au
tsta, 8:35 p. m.
8:47 p. in., No. 16 daily, for Co
mibia, Charleston and initermediate
)ints. Pullman sleeper from Colum- esimea
a, arrive Columbia 10:35 p. m. Prcs5
iarleston 8:15 a. m.
Summer Excursion tickets now on
le. ...- ..
For further information, apply to
iket agents, or,
C. H. Ackert,
V. . &G. .,Washington, D. C.
V. . &G. W. H. Tayloe, Good
G. P. A.. Washington, D. C.
J. L. Meek,
A. G. P. A., Atlanta, Ga.
W. E. McGee,
T. P. A., Augusta, Ga.
NIEWBERRY UNION STATIONPDF..
rival and Departure of Passenger
I'rains-Efective 12.01 A. M- (Not gc
Sunday May 30, 1909.
Southern Railway:
o. 15 for Greenville .. . .8.57a.m. ______
. 18' for Columbia .. ...1.40 p.m
. 11 for Greenviile .. . .2.43 p.m. tlT't
.is: ior (\bmiboh .. .84 p.m. ~~ rn
C.. N. & L. Rly pr rmt
N 22 for Columbia . -. ..8.47 a.m. rte IlI
,.52 for (omn.ri'h. . . 2..5( p.!im esoni
>. as fo r lubia . . . .3.20 p.m t1012
S21 Gr Laitrens .. . .7.25 p.m
* Does not,ut onoSind.
Rlk With You
special Sales.
;et to any mercantile business.
ting, and that in which faith is put. It
a feeling of security.
its and stores who make big extravagant
ion't fulfill them.
;o many unsuccessful special sales, and
confidence in sales because they do not
re what they a7e led to expect.
ed the confidence which the public has
1 take a back seat, for he is a dead one
:ss.
mnd ambition has been to CREATE confi
is advertising. He has succeeded, for this
ds of shoppers that have crowded his store
:h opened last Saturday, December 4th,
:le 'hat was advertised has been put be
k has been put at Great Sweeping reduc
ich penny sale is being carried on as ad
illed in its detail.
this Sweeping Sale, and these days will
here are new attractions and new features
you during tlese days, as you will be
th you, we want to say that Cooper is
a his power to retain and hold the confi
n him, and he assures you that when he
ises an opportunity or a sale, you can
F sale, and that he will do just as he *d
.C. COOPER,
Across from Newberry Savings Bank. -
Co.,
stock.
day, December i8th, at 8. p. m.
IJ UP8 OUSI.
ARHARDT AND BAXTER,
J MANAGERS.
londay, DeCember I3.
nerica's Greatest Success
LLY OF THE CIRCUS9
ctly as Presentred One Solid Year
In New York City.
Circus Horses
Ponies 'Dancing Mules.
Talking Dogs
c to $1.50. Seats on Sale FEiday, December I0.
For I Vote in The Herald
ind Wews Voting Contest
od after 6 o'clock Monday, Dec. 13, 1909.)
ay be expected to dt~ e.tm irpyn ontu
station, but their d.hbeenetne oDcme i
guarantee d and the 10.Atrta aetep1
rubjeet to e1kange with- wl tah
4G. L. Robinson, fydr
Statin Mate 190. Af.e tuhat dte ler& pre
will ttach