The Pageland journal. [volume] (Pageland, S.C.) 1911-1978, March 28, 1917, Image 4
WlV.VAV.VAWAW.V.VWy ,
i THE CROSS-EYED COOK
t
Mr. and Mrs. Brooks had been married
only a few months, but already
they had had nine cooks, and most of
the time had been without a servant
at all. After each and every departure
of the presiding dames of the culinary
department of the Brooks household,
Mrs. Brooks declared that she was sick
and tired of fooling with them, and
that thereafter she would do all vhe
cooking with her own fair hands. Mrs.
Brooks was long on enthusiasm, but a
trifle short on experience and skill.
buu auer a weeK or two or wneat
cakes with all the taste and juciness
of asbestos, chops with all the endurance
and elasticity of rope-ends, and
coffee that tasted like a chill tonic,
Mr. Brooks was wont to declare that
she was simply wearing herself to a
frazzle; that he wasn't going to have
it any longer, and that a cook must be
immediately signed up.
It was on the first evening after they
had moved into a new flat, and Just
ofter Mr. Rrooks had taken a stand of
this sort that Mrs. Brooks announced
that she had that day engaged a new
cook, who had promised to appear on
the following morning.
On his return home from the office
the following evening, instead of Mrs.
Brooks, he met at the door of the
flat an apparition that made him give
a perceptible start before he could
control himself. It was a huge, bony,
white-turbaned negress, with a complexion
of Stygian blackness and the
cross-eyedest pair of cross-eyes that
Brooks had ever seen in a human being.
He walked back into the flat wondering
where his wife could be. That
person came bouncing in almost at
that instant, explaining that she had
juai ruu oui ior some nowers, the occasion
being one that seemed to call
for some celebration. "Have you seen
her?" she demanded.
"Oh, It's a her, Is It?" said Mr.
Brooks. "I'm glad you told me or I
might not have known. Yes, I have
seen her, and I am still a trifle weak
from the shock."
"What is the name of this Ill-favored
danghter of Ham?"
"Gwendolyn," replied Mrs. Brooks.
"Gwendolyn," repeated her husband,
sinking weakly down upon a couch.
It was a very agreeable odor that
smote Mr. Brook's nostrils as he lifted
the cover from Gwendolyn's dishes.
And they proved to be no false heralds.
Not many times In his life hud
he sat down to so satisfying a meal,
he soon found himself saying. Sipping
a cup of delicious coffee, Mr. Brooks
lit a cigar, pushed his chair back from
the table, and forthwith pronounced
the gargoyllan Gwendolyn the original
pearl of great price. Mr. Brooks, in
. . fact, was so pleased and satisfied that
he could not resist the temptation to
tease his young wife a little.
"I might have known, though," he
said gloomily, "that there would be
some thorn to the rose. How could
you have deliberately invited bad luck
by bringing a cross-eyed negro Into
the flat Just as we have moved into
itr
Mrs. Brooks looked up In alarm. Her
eyes widened. "Why, really, are they
bad luck?" she Inquired anxiously.
"Are they bad luck?" he repeated
solemnly. "Do you mean to tell me
that you've lived almost twenty-two
years and never heard that about a
cross-eyed negro. Why, my dear child,
they're almost the worst luck there Is."
"llow dreadful!" exclaimed Mrs.
Brooks, looking as if some horrible calamity
had already befallen. "What
are we going to do about It?"
"Nothing." said Mr. Brooks. "We'll
just stand pat. You see It may be I
years and years before this bad luck
happens, so there's no use worrying
about it."
Meals at the Brooks flat continued
to be enjoyable. Gwendolyn remuined |
gloomy and silent, but she proved her- j
self a born cook, and Brooks wended
his way homeward every evening with
great satisfaction in the thought of the
dinner that was waiting him.
It was a month or two after Gwendo- 1
lyn's initial triumph that Mr. Brooks
went home one evening and found his
wife cooking dinner und also herself |
in the kitchen. She explained that it |
was Gwendolyn's nfternoon ofT.
It was after her husband had eaten I
bravely through the meal that Mrs.
Brooks gathered herself together and
suddenly burst out:
"John, just now I told you only a
half truth. It Is the cook's day off, but
she Isn't coming back any more."
"What7" almost shrieked Mr.
Brooks. "What has happened?"
"I've discharged her," said Mrs.
Brooks almost tearfully.
"Discharged her!" shouted Mr.
Brooks. "What does all this mean?"
"Well, you see. Harry, It was like
this," began Mrs. Brooks tremblingly.
"I was feeling lonesome today while .
you were gone, and I picked up a novel
telling about a vouni? hriHo ...h~ *
o f*uv lUOl
her husband on their honeymoon, nnd
It was so sad I cried and cried. And
then the horrible thought came to me
?what If you should die! Then I remembered
what you snld about crosseyed
negroes bringing had luck. Gwendolyn
was working In the kitchen and
the awful thought came to me that If
you died It would be because of her,
and I would lose my mind and go staring
mad thinking how It was me that
brought her Into the house. The
thought preyed on me till I couldn't
stand It any longer, so I just went in
and discharged her."
Mr. Brooks sank hack Into his chair
In dumb ctupefuctlon and then with a
suppressed groan he, metaphorically
tjUafrifl flwa away., ^
JU5TA
LITTLE
Domestic Economy.
"After all," said the extravagant
wife, "it certainly pays to buy the
best."
"Oh, It does, eh?" sneered the longsuffering
frelghtpayer of the combinution.
"Of course It does," she replied.
"Just look at this gown that I paid
?300 for. I've worn it three times already
and It looks us good as new."
Suspicion Aroused.
"Do you favor the suggestion that
HfiPlnro n)\nndnn thn r\roofl/?? irri.l*i,?.?
-uouuvu i.ic|>iavi.iv:c Ul VTllllUfc
their prescriptions In Latin?"
"In a general way, I don't suppose it
makes much difference," replied the
confirmed invalid, "but sometimes when
I think my physician is merely jollying
me along I certainly would like to know
what Latin words signify bread pills
and sweetened water."
About the Size of It.
"The road to fame Is not only rough,
but It Is all the way uphill," remarked
the moralizer.
"Yes," rejoined the demoralizer, "but,
let a man start down the hill, and he
will find everything greased for the
occasion."
Unbiased Criticism.
"What do you think I ought to get
for this painting?" asked the young
and unsophisticated artist.
"Well," replied the matter-of-fact
friend, "I think any judge would be
justified in giving you at least six
months."
LIKE LOTS OF US.
c?'
We approached a seedy-looking individual
on the street corner.
"Prosperity," we observed, consolingly,
"has ruined many a man."
"Well, I'd just like to see It ruin me,"
he answered boastfully.
Perceiving the uselessness of our
sympathy, we discreetly withdrew.
gmmmmmmmmi
I Gnano
I I
g We have the
a stock:
3 Cole Distributoi
0 Cote Cotton an(
S Cote Cotton Pla
g Covington Coth
B Rex Guano Dist
? Climax Cotton 1
q We also have a
g We now have
| had and are bette
| We appreciate
1 Pageh
L__
...
Chesterfield nounty Boys Join
Navy
Several Cheslerfield County
boys have signed up with Uncle
Sam's navy this week, among
the number are Messers. Thomas
Bundy, Edgar Woods, Ed
mond Elixon and Calvin Mcintosh.
Mr. Thos. Bundy is a member
of Co. 1, Cheraw Guards*
therfore he has not gone to
Chrleston with the other boys.
It is expected, however, that he
will go on within the next day
day or so.?Cheraw Chronicle. |
Better Farmin
PEANUTS AS~
B To make money
the farmer aa
that jbas 'not a
D. B. OSBORNE "Cash Sutrender
Value" (In an Interrupted market
demand) cannot be considered aa a
crop grown for Real Profit, although
an Indirect profit may result in .Teduo
ing the co6t of a Money* Crop.
Money Crop Glvee Real Pnoflt
It Is the Money Crop thait gives
real profit to the farm and a Money
Crop can only be a crop of a known
market value Immediately convertible
into money in any town at any time.
The problem of supplying the Southern
farmer with a cash tm
other crops that would yield as much
or more profit than he derives from
the cotton crop, has engaged the attention
of the farmer and his friends,
and with the assistance of the Boll
Weevil, they have founds <a solution.of
the problem In Peanuts.
Tlie Peanut
The Peanut crop ofleow wonderful
opportunities. It can be grown over
the entire South with "profit.
It reaches its perfetgLion in growth
and yield on well drained, gray, saady
loam soils such as exist in the Coastal
Plains along the. Atlantic Seaboard,
which territory is now either occupied
or is being rapidly * encroached upon
by the Boll Weevil. \
There is a constant*" demand at a
"Cash Surrender Value" from a market
that would be difficult to glut with
the peanut, for the reason that there
are five avenues of profit.
Five Avenues of Profit
First: Progressive oil mills throughout
the South are eagei buyers o? tb*?
Peanut and offer a afoot cash market
at very remunerative prices. The
oil is In great demand.
Second: The nut and vines are a
splendid feed for cattle,' producing a
quick growth of firm and tender meat.
A profit in the sales v<jf cattle thus
fed and fattened is a certainty.
Third: The best quality of peanuts
find a ready sale at top pruys to the
manufacturers of candy, of rf^aaut butter
and other confections, w
Fourth: Peanut catae (from the oil
mills), fed to hogs, makes a vigorous
growth and gain in weight and
wliffti properly "finished off" with
corn, gives a Arm meat with the fat
containing a proper proportion of
Bteanno for making, good firm lard.
Peeling lite whole' nut to the hog
is a Mistake for two reasons: First,
the value or profit fronv the oil is
lost, and second, the oil of the nut
gives an excess of oil over stearine
mmmmmmmmin]
V
Dfstributi
Manters
following Planters and
s at $5.50, 8.00 and 9.0
I Corn Planters $14.00
nters $8.50
*
>n and Corn Planters $1
ributors $11.50
Planters $5.00
i few Middle Busters at
the best assorted stoc
r nrenared to sunnlv v
_ r- - ? rr_j j
your trade.
ind Hardwa
mm smiwmmum
Monuments
Now is the time to buy that
monument you expect to buy.
See me and save time and
money.
G. R. Knight.
Veterinary Surgeon
Calls answered day or ni.jht.
Phone No. 48 two rings.
Full stock of horse and cattle
powders on hand at all times.
L. P. GRAVES
g in the South
A CASH CROP
and produces in the hog a soft, flabby
meat, the fat of which will not produce
lard of a proper consistency.
Fifth: The Peanut, being a legume,
Is a soil builder and adds nitrogen to
the soil and works in splendidly in a
rotation with cotton or corn, both of
which are voracious feeders on nitrogen
and requiring clean culture, rapIdly
deplete the soil of nitrates.
Proper Fertilization
Because it is a legume, many people
believe that it requires no fertilizers
and in this they are badly mistaken.
Nitrogen gathering nodules
do not begin to form on the roots of
the plant until the nut is two-thirds
matured and if through lack of proper
nourishment, the plant is allowed
to languish until this stage is reached,
the crop will be greatly curtailed
and profits lost
The plant requires a sufficient
amount of nitrogen from a quick acting
source to carry it to the nodule forming
period while the presence in sufficient
quantities of phosphoric acid and
potash is essential during the growth
and maturity of the plant.
An application of a fertilizer containing
12 per cent available phosnhnpto
1 1-^ ?A 9 no. oon? " ?
monia and 2 per cent potash, applied
at tha rate of from 400 to 600 pounds
per acre, will make a crop of both
nuts and bar sufficient to return the
ooet of the fertilizer and leave a handsome
profit while an nnfertillaed crop
will barely return cost ef production.
The Profit Value
The profit value of an acre of well
cultivated and fertilized peanuts ia
equal to the profit value of an acre of
ootton producing two-thirds of a bale
to the acre.
The following tabulated cost and
value estimated by Dr. J. N. Harper,
elearly proves this point:
Comparative -Cost Per Acre of Cotton
and Peanuts
%toa Peanuts
(t Per Acre Co?t
$ 1.50 Breaking Land $ 1.50
Harrowine Land .25
.50 Hauling Fertilizers .50
.IS Laying off Land .25
,25. Applying J?eitilizerx .25
.50 Bedding on Fertilizer .50
.25 Harrowing bafore Planting .25
.75 Seed 2.00
8.00 Fertilizers 8.00
.25 Planting .25
5.50 Cultivation 2.50
5.00 Harvesting *14.00
2.00 Preparing for Market 2.50
1.75 Marketing 2.00
8.00 Rent 8.00
$34.50 $42.75
Comparison of Returns froaa Cotton
, and Peanuts.
333 Iba. Lint cotton at 15c lb $49.95
667 lbs. Cotton Seed at $50 ton 16.66
Gross profit $66.61
Cost of cotton 34.50
Net profit cotton $32.11
75 Bushels peanuts at 80c hu $60.00
. 1 Ton peanut hay at $15 ton 15.00
Gross profit $75.00
Cost, of peanuts 42.75
Net profit peanuts $32.25
If harvested by machine the cost will bt
less.
uiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiuiro
)rsand 1
I Distributors in n
D each. g
12.50 I
last years prices. ?
k we have ever q
our wants. g
re Co. |
[rararaxnimmnrag
I M. L. Davis
Davis & Fi
NEW CAS
We are adding dail]
Merchandise,"such Dry
our trade demands and <
ey will buy them.
Our expenses are
doing business in the
own work.
We thank our frie:i<
liberal patronage given
ance of same on the b
to one and all.
Davis & Fi
"Look Out for the Fifth Year"
"This is the dangerpoint in
marriage" says Cosmo Hamil
ton.
"I have written my new story
"The Turning Point" says Cosmo
Hamilton, famous English
author and playvvrite, "for the
young husbands and wives of
America, and I nope all young
husbands and wives will read it."
Mr. Hamilton is now over in
this country looking after the
production of some of his new
plays, having received special
furlough from army duty for
this purpose. With his plays he
brought several short stories for
the American public, one of
which "The Turning Point" is
to appear this month in Hearst's
Magazine. Mr. Hamilton, him
self, is particularly interested in
this story because it is not entirely
fiction but deals with one
of the real problems of our age?
marriage and divorce.
"I am hurling this story out
like a hand grenade" says Mr.
Hamilton "and I hope it bursts".
It is the story of a young husband
who in the fifth year of
marriage suddenly comes up
against one of natures danger
spots. He is a very decent fel
low?kind generous, loving ana
loval. Ilis wife is a charming
r.:.l 1 : : ?
ucauiHUl UUU UlSPirCU lO
motherhood. Yet they come to
the very edge of separation and
divorce. It takes a staggering
surpi ise to open the man's eyes
to his one glaring fault, which
is the cause of it all?a fault, incidentally,
which Mr. Hamilton
believes is very common among
husbands.
"The Turning Point" is being
published in Hearst's Magazine
for April, which is on the news
stand March 29th.
(Advertisement)
jOGCGOOGGCOO! 3
8
8 Financing
o
A The farmer's business
N financial backing if it is
Q That is one reason wh
Q and willing bank behind
O It is an important fun<
Iff temporary assistance to
\ of us, and who have den
A repay obligations when
Q The best way to have
? an account with us, and
V only the farmer but evei
X ground financially to do
?
S The Bank
lit
1 I
H.\V. Funderburk fl I
inderburk i I
H STORE I I
j to our stock of general f! I
goods and Groceries as I
it prices as low as mon- I
cut to the minimum by
hitch lot and doing our I
ds and customers for the fl
us and solicit a continu- H
>asis of square dealing
nnderburk , I
Church Service Directoy
J. W. Elkins, M. E: I
Pageland, 1st Sunday at 8: p.
m. and 3rd Sunday 3:30 p. m.
Zion, 3rd and 4th Sunda3*s at 1
11 o'clock. 1
Antioch. 2nd Sunday at 11. '
Mt. Croghan, 2nd Sunday at
3:30 p. m. and 4th at 8. p. m.
Zoar, 1st Sunday, at 11 o'clock.
Sundnv eol<onl nt nil th?> oKnvo
churches at 10 o'clock.
R. W. Cato, Baptist.
Mt. Moriah, 1st Saturday at 3
p. m. and Sunday at 11. Sunday
school at 10.
Bethel, 2nd Saturday at 3. p. m
and Sunday at 11 o'clock. Sunday
school at 3 except on 2nd
Sunday.
B. S. Funderburg, Baptist:
Pageland, 2nd Sunday at 11
and 8, and the 4th at 8. Sunday
school at 10.
Dudley, 2nd Sunday at 4 and
the 4th at 11. Sunday school at
3 except on the 4th when it is
at 10.
R. M. Haigler, Baptist:
Liberty Ilill. 1st Saturday at 11
and Sunday at 3. Sunday
school at 2:30 except on the 1st
Sunday at 2.
Mt. Pisgah, 4th Sunday at 3,
and Saturday at 11.
J. w - t^uick, JVl. v:
Pageland, 3rd Sunday at 11
and 2nd at 3:30. Sunday school
at 10 except on the 2nd Sunday.
New Hope 1st Sunday at 11.
Hethesda 4th Sunday at 11.
Hear Creek 4th Sunday at 4 p. m.
J. F. Hammond. Baptist:
Union Hill 1st Sunday at 11
and Saturday at 3 o'clock. Sunday
school at 10. Prayer meeting
every Saturday n ght.
Close Cut-Outs
Notice is hereby given that
the Town ordinance with reference
to cut-outs on automobiles
will be enforced. Cut-outs must
be closed on all cars running on
the streets of the Town.
I. E. AGERTON. Mayor.
eoooooeooo??%
?
The Farmer 8
b
often needs a little extra X
to grow and prosper. N
ly he should have strong ft
him. Q
r.tion of this hank to aivo ?
the farmers who seek it V
lonstrated their ability to X
due. X
a credit here is to carry Q
we cordially invite not ?
y one who wants to gain JJ
so. X
b
of Pageland S
K iOQOQOOOQOQ^
1