The Pageland journal. [volume] (Pageland, S.C.) 1911-1978, December 22, 1915, Image 5
How the Monroe Niggers Get
Religion
The Monroe Journal tells in
the following manner how some
of the town's colored citizens get
religion:
Jack and Lonnie are two well
known little darkeys around
Monroe. They are brothers and
are always quarreling at each
nthor Kilt nlharniica nrn incnnnr
V/??1 VIUVITTIO^ UIV iuo^|/aiw
able. Some time ago, Lonnie
went on the mourners bench at
one of the colored churches and
"got" religion.
Now there wasn't anything unusual
about that, but Lonnie possesses
a rather erratic nature and
has for years resited the appeals
of his pastor; so, when the pas
tor saw Lonnie at last give heed
to his pleadings, he was ovejcktfed?
So much was his joy, that
he asked Lonnie to pray.Xvith the
following apology to 'the older
bretheren. /
"Of course. Brother Lonnie is
a young head, but it don't make
no difference, for it's a smart
99
uue. y-'
Lonnie arose, gave a few
grunts, shut his eyes as tight as
possible and reared back his
head in prayer:
"Oh, Lord, bless my brother,
Jack.
"Oh, Lord, bless eberybody.
"Oh, Lord, bless my brother,
Jack.
4,Oh, Lord*"bless eberybody.
"Oh, Lord, hit my brother
Jack in the belly with a Jeremiah
hammer."
On another occasion, Will
Pethel, also a well known darkey
around town, went up to
the mourner's bench, they say.
This action on the part of Will
caused even more surprise than
Lonnie's similar one, as not only
the pastor but practically, the entire
congregation had conspired
to save Will's soul.
Besides Will, there was also a
number of other "candidates" to
be prayed for on the mourner's
bench. The preacher exhorted
and he warned. He preached
?' "and he preached. BTnailv
-the^casdidatsa^ save Will,
arose and shifted the sand out
of their shoes. Long about two
o'clock in the morning the
preacher was still praying to the
Lord to clean Biother Pethel's
shoes.
Finally, the preacher decided
to go over to the candidate and
whisper a few words privately
in the ears of the erstvyhile candidate.
Gently he whispered,
but still no response. Finally,
he became so exasperated that
he grabbed Will's head and help
it up. Then he saw the result
of his labor, as Brother Pethel
was just opening his eyes, having
been asleep all the time.
Proof.
It was the rush hour in the ca
feteria, one of these quick lunch
places where you help yourself
and grab a chair and use the
arm of the chair as a table. A
rush feeder grabbed a slice of
pie and copped out a chair.
rhon ho romo '?
. uv >VIUC<1IUC1CU I11UI lit;
needed coffee aud he dashed
over to the service counter.
When he returned with his
coffee his chair was occupied by
another hurry up diner.
"Excuse me," said the first
man, "but that is my chair."
"How do you know it is your
chair?*'demanded the occupant
in a surly tone.
"Because I can prove it," stated
the first man.
"How can you prove it?" asked
the occupant.
"By the seat of your pants,"
was the reply. "You are sitting
on my pie."?S. W. Bradham,
Georgia.
Meeting of County Commissioners
Tho
m nv vyuumj vyuuu::'?.sioners
will hold their annual meeting
on the 31st of Dec. All persons
having claims against the County
will present them on that
day. |
D. M, Barentine,
Clerk. J
L
UNION COUNTY NEWS
Clipped From Our Exchanges J
and put Int o Paragraphs for
The Busy Readers.
Mr. R. W. Lemmond, Clerk of
the Court, has received the pension
warrants for the old soldiers
and their wives in time for
Christmas.
"How far could you walk in a
day?" Mr, Frank Broom was
asked. "?)on*t know, never
tried. L left Albemarle one
morning at eight o'clock and (
walked to Monroe by five that *
evening. That is thirty-eight 1
I miles. Don't know how far I
, could go iii a day." 1
v ivirs. A. M. Nisbet of Buford j
I "township dropped dead about r
six o'clock this morning. She
got up as usual this morning and j
j went to the kitchen, but told her
' husband that she was feeling
bad. She started back to the '
i house and fell, and by the time !
! her husband helped her to the .
house she expired. Mrs. Nisbet
was about 70 years of age.
The Enquirer has had for
| several years a watermelon for
Christmas. Our friend, Mr.
Canady Jarmon, of Buford town
' ship, has furnished the melons. 1
He keeps them as sound as can .
be and they are in every way
all right Mr. Jarmon has left c
two melons at The Enquirer office
for the Christmas dinner
just nine days off. .
Mr. Luther Williams' store l
was entered last Friday night t
and a lot of fruit taken. A glass \
in front of the store was broken s
bv the thief* Evidently from
the marks on the front door the ?
thief had first tried to prize it 0
open witn an iron bar, and fail- "
ing to do this had smashed in 1
the glass against which there
[ was a pile of apples. ?
Auditors
> The Auditors' office will be oj
sonal property from January 1st 19
. All, mala citizens between the
deemed Taxable polls, except thos
i causes are incapable of earning a s
The Law requires 50 per cent
ertv subject to taxes and not return
' the 20th of February 1916
I will be in the Auditor's office
and 31: Feb., 5, 7,10,11,12, 14, 15
the following places on the dates i
Patrick Jan. 10 from 11 to 3 1
o'clock. (
Cedar Creek Church Jan. 11
from 11 to 3 o'clock. 1
John C. Wallaces' Jan. 12 from
11 to 3 o'clock. 1
Cashes' Jan. 13 from 11 to 2
o'clock. 1
Grants Mill Jan. 14 from 9 to
12 o'clock. 1
Westfield Creek Jan. #15 from 10
to 12 o'clock. i
Cross Roads Jan. 17 from 11 to
3 o'clock.
Jefferson Jan. 18 and 19 to 12 1
nVlnrlr.
Catarrh Jan. 19 from 1 to 4 1
o'clock. <
T. W. EDDINS, <
I B
(sure and see
purchasing yo
for the trees.
A nice line
^f^^^Wes, paper, i
a variety of si
\ f sents to go in
T.L
i
Mr. L. M. Boone tells The
ournal that the people of Zoar
:hurch community are preparng
to have a Christmas tree at
he church next Friday afterloon
and the public is invited
o take part in the occasion.
Mr. Tom Cox, who carries the
nail on route eight, has got
nore ways of traveling than any
nan vou ever saw. Most any
ime of day you can see him
:oming in off his route, the time
lepending upon the condition
>f the road and the mode of
ravel on that day. He rides a
ncycie some Times, sometimes
le goes like greased lightning
>n a motorcycle, at other'times
le rides a longlegged horse,
rhen he will drive a short legfed
one hitched to a buggy, ana
le has an automobile which he
nay lide on the route sometimes
vhen the new wears off. In the
neantime, he is not above footng
it if the occasion demands,
rle's tried everything between
t wheelbarrow and a flying machine.
Color Blind. _
Three Irishmen were stop>ing
at a second-rate hotel, and
>ne of them had imbibed so freey
at the bar that he had to be
carried to his room, in which alto
slept a negro in a separate
>ed. His comrades, as a practical
joke, proceeded to paint the
rish man's face black. In the
norning, when awakened by
he proprietor, he got up, an
tappened to catch sight of himtelf
in the mirror.
It/M. 1 IM a. ?
uu, uejaDers: ne exciaimea,
'what a lot of blamed idiots,
hure they have gone and woke
he nigger by mistake!"
And he crawled back into bed
igain.?
Notice.
w&mxt
)ened for the assessment of Per
1 acre Fpf 91 n
e who are maimed or for other
upport.
penalty added to taxes on proped
for assessment on or before
i Jan., 1? 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 15, 29,
i, 16, 17,18, 19, and 20, and at
named:
Plains Jan. 20 from 9 to 12
]luess Jan. 21 from 11:30 to 2:30
o'clock.
dt. Croghan Jan. 24 from 11 to
4 o'clock.
Dudley Jan. 25 from 1 to 4
o'clock.
'ageland Jan. 26 and 27 to 12
o'clock.
1 f _ - * - - ~
\udv J an. irom 11 to 3
o'clock.
Vliddendorf Feb. 1 from 11 to 3
o'clock.
\ngelup Feb. 2 from 11 to 3
o'clock.
McBee Feb. 5 and 4.
Dheraw Feb. 8 and 9.
County Auditor
E
4JU i
us before ilfSfcVl '
ur Prcsonis^^
o{ Holiday^^f^^L
ribbon an d|S#2l
litable pre-^^z*?h
them. \ I
CATO
Two of a Kind.
Mrs. Smith demanded of the
dealer that a lamp she had purchased
be taken back.
"What's the matter with it?"
he retorted.
"It has all the faults of my
husband and none of his virtues,"
she exclaimed, crisply.. "It has
too much brass about it. It is
not remarkably brilliant, requires
a good deal of attention, is un
steady on its legs, flares up oc
casionally, is always out at bed
time, and is bound to smoke."?
A/T? r ~i:~ %/r 11 W
itna. liciiu iviuuseu, rvansas.
MONEY--does not grow on tree,
but it does grow in banks. A
500 pound bale of cotton at present
price will earn you $23.43 in
eight years. Bank of Pageland.
Everybody needs Underwear,
Mungo Bros, sell the warm kind
The Pagel<
Is a corporatioi
men lor the purp
ter e- to! the welllai
ing community, a
to thank the people' lo
?I_J i iL-i ?-.I
yidu iu say uiai wiui
"success
-f~.r
QURP
This )ace
A merry chri
See us in our
Pageland!
MEET VI
ME AT 1"
Buy your salt from C. I,. Gulledge at
Guess. He buys it in car loads. 12 flX
A GIFT FROM 1
****** At Chrtstmi
What brings back the good
; youth to our minds and hearts?
; our imagination in the private
each member of the family seel
own rooms and there inscribing
I ping their dainty packages.
A Watch for Brother Jack
An elegent Fob for Bil
A Pendant for Lilj
And Mother a
While Lac
prise, but you may know tl
jewelry.
JEWELRY! The soul in M
man never fashioned, bo says e
in fact, every individual piece c
they can speak, and thev are t
"A Gift From the Heart".
B. B. Eul
Pflnelnnd
md Insurance
Company
n composed of business,
>ose of protection, and h
re of its citizens of Pagelai
nd.at the close of this
r their cooperation, and supp<
l your cooperation we have n
j|/F\'TT,r\ am Trii
tlKJt 1 tK3UU
will be reserved lor US?W
istmas to all, and
all men.
office; we await w
Insurance & S
A. F FUNDER1
?*
7 Prepare F
UnllA
f 11V11U
H dPFl/IT something
/ V Hi trashy stuff
you anything to eat or
^$51. ments of Dress Goods
and Clothing. Look th<
8 For The Chrl
# and H
p Get you a barrel of a
oranges at a knock-out p
- FLOUR ??*a."'
pricejwhile it lasts. Ce
i ? .
^ uurs is ine grown
where the ott
tungo Bro
Dress Goods should be bought
)m M ungo Bros.
["HE HEART.
as Time ******
old Christmasv spirit of
This is what: To see in
dwelling on the avenue
king the privacy of their
: their gift cards and wrap1
r
Sparkling Brooch
i * ?c? get?well it's a suriij?
much, it's a piece of
[etal torm! A better gift
very Ring, Watch, Brooch,
>f iewelry in my shop. For
;ver and ever whispering,
banks
S. C.
& Realty
and professional
jrthering the inad
and surroundyear
we desires
ort in the past are
lade our business a
CESS"
_____ \
VTCH IT.
good will to
ith pleasure.
tealty Co.
BURK Mgr.
. I
or The |
ay Joys |
useful instead of 1
. We can furnish ?
wear. New ship- |
, Shoes, Underwear |
jm over.
istmas Tree
ome
pples and a crate of
rice while they last.
icing every day but
selling at the old
ir RustJProof Oats.
ng store. Trade
ters trade.
fliers