The Camden journal. [volume] (Camden, S.C.) 1866-1891, March 13, 1873, Image 1
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1 x T JM- '
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VOL. XXXII. CAMDEN, S. C., THUKSDAY, MARCH i3, 1873. NO. 38
r
. THE 5E5 JOURNAL.
AN
INDEPENDENT FAULT PAPER
PUBLISHED BY
* JOHN KERSHAW.
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Washington Correspondence.
Washington, March 1.
the agony over.
The great Credit Mobilier trial is over. It
was a grand and impressive sight while the
pleading was going on?when the elegant
and courtly Poland recited the evidence
given be fere the committee and gave the
reasons for the action of that body?when
the eloquence of Qen. Banks resonnded in
ringing tones on the same side which contrasted
so strangely with the impressive, severe
and eonvinoiag judicial manner of Mr.
Merrick, alao of the committee, who made
by fhr the beat speech on the side of the
resolutions of the Committee. Messrs Voorhes
and Butler evidently felt the greatness
of the occasion, for thongh both art successful
criminal lawyers, they never before plead
at ao august a bar. With words that brought
conviction, and in tones that thrilled the <
" ? vr?i? i e i.:?
vast assemDiage, mr. voornes spu^c iur um
friend, Mr. Brooks, no# his client, and his
great reputation as, a lawyer was added to by
his legal argument, while his force as an orator
was acknowledged to be unsurpassed, as
his voice rose and fell in musical tones,
swaying his hearer* to his will, and when he
had inished there was a moment's dead silence
ere the spell of his elouuence was
broken, when aronndof apple use succeeded.
Had a rote been taken then there would hare
net even been a vote of oeuaure. Such is
the wonderful power of the orator. Ben
.Butler aade, probably, the best speech of his
life. He was cutting as a raior, witty, sarcastieal,
irooieal, and I was about to add,
eloquent,' but his harsh, grating voice forbids
it; his speech, however, was most effective.
Butler brought tears to Oakee
Amos' eyes by bis panygeric of himr. The
old gout had no idea how good and noble j
a man he was until Butler told it. Ben a
pitched into the press, and thanked God s
that the newspapers had not nude him. The ]
press gang, with one aooord, said, "Amen," 1
at they woo Id not like to be responsible for t
sueh an abortion on hnmanitj as Ben is.? t
Mr. Yoorhee closed his remarks in an ap- i
peal for, not merej, bat jastice for Mr (
Brooks. The ineoneisteneies and oontradio- t
tiona, as shown by the rotes on the different e
amendments, was -evidence sufficient to i
prove that the Honse did not know exactly what
it was doing. Even some of the oldest j
Kliamentarians were puxsled. After the t
se had by a rota declared that it had c
not jurisdiction to expel members for acts <
committed during a previous, it turned right t
round and. assumed jthe power to censure i
Brooks and Ames. There can be no doubt
of the guilt of all the accused members, and 1
there was a general desire among all classes i
for their punishment. Instead there has \
been a letting up. This much the people i
know, and they do not care about the tech- c
nical reasons that prompted the votes of ]
members against meting out even-handed i
justice to the guilty ones, though there is a ?
feeling of satisfaction that Measrs. Brooks t
and Ames were not made scapegoats for oth- j
era equally culpable, and those who voted j
?* nit fha crrnnnris nf in- o
^VIUM ?uy 1COVIUMVUa ?uv -- ?
% justioe, fin fully justified in to doing- Bat t
Congress has not, in the estimation of the t
people, done their duty in the matter and
the effect of a want of confidence in the hon- <
eaty and firmness of Congress, is to be de- i
plored. Ben Butler attacked the press for <
their fearlessness in showing up this matter t
and letting daylight in. The Chronicle and
the Republican here, both small sised or- i
gaas of the Administration, are also out on j
the same business, and the press is being j
held up as a terrible engine, even the New i
Tork Times, the Grant organ, catches it.? ]
The Philadelphia Press, Forney's paper, in J
speaking of the terribly corrupt condition of j
legislation says, "The press is the most trustworthy
exponent of of popular rights, ami
in the hour of the country's shame, the pro- <
pie turn with increased confidence to the jour- i
nalist who defends their interests and denoun- ;
ees their wrongs," and "on the journalist,
therefore, and not on the legislator, will the ,
people rely for a_repr>?aentatiTe that is en
tirely hooest." This bu toe true ring ana
it is the opinion of the journalist* all over
the country, despite the howl* of Butler,
Harlan of the Chronicle, or the scribbler of
the Republican.
AM KXCEK8BNCK.
Old Zack Chandler, ths Micbigander, is
one of the prominenees or proturbonce* of the
8enate, a sort of carbuncle or when, which
to conduce to a more health condition of the
body Senatorial should be lopped off. It will
be remembered that a few years ago hs went
to Europe in a blase of tinsel giory, with his
ebony colored servant* rigged out in gaudy
livery, with tfto court of arms of the State of
_t:A
Michigan on their surer Douoaa, wuiuu
were as large as small saucers. Ip London,
be disgnsted evcrr bodj by bis dflbnken capers,
and was the butt and laughing-stock on
accoannt of his snobbery. In consequence,
be swore after the manner of Hamilcar against
the Romans, eternal rengeanee against Mr.
John Boll, Esq The Duke of Michigan?
Chandler?then tried Edinburgh, but the .
canny Scot was too sharp a chid to make
game of the Chairman of the United States
Committee of Commeree, and while with their
tongues in their cheeks and bursting with
laughter at the old galoat, they flattered
him to his heart's contest, and feted and
dined end wined?no, i mean wmsneu uiu(
?to his entire satisfaction, no small job, for
the Dake is capacious. The result is, that
inee Zack has come back from " furrin
parts" he has been the bitter and uncompromising
opponent of every measure looking
to the revival of our eomraerce, especially
that with Europe. This he has been
charged with on the floor of the Senate As
there are reasons for everything there must
be also for this, tie is down on Mr. John
Ball yet, indirectly assists in helping his
fcoodHMfc II b fiW/il tiff* to torp
business scots gave him material reasons for
Buch a coarse as he pursues. It is known
that he frequently receives liquors, Ac., Ac.,
from abroad as presents that are marked
"free/' showing that his efforts are duly appreciated.
Is it not time that this unprincipled
drunken lout was removed from a position
which he does not ornament and which
he uses to the detriment of the country's
best and most vital interests ?
INAUGURAL ADDRESS
OP
PRESIDENT GRANT.
Washington, March 4.?The following
is the Inaugural Address of the President:
Fellow Oitizent: Under Providence, I
have been called a second timo to act as
Executive over the great nation. It has
been my endeavor in the past to maintain all
the laws and so far as lay in my power to
fnr the best interests of the whole peo
pie. My best efforts will bo given in the
same direction in the future, and I trust by
my four years experience in the office.
W hen my first term of office or Chief Executive
began, the country had not recovered
from the efforts of a great internal revolution,
ind three of the former States of the Union
bad not been restored to their federal relations.
It seemed to me that no new questions
should be raised so long as that condition of
iffairs existed; therefore, the past four years,
so far as I control events, have been consumed
in the effort to restore harmony, the public
credit, commerce, and all the arts of peace
ind progress.
It is my firm conviction that the civilized
irorld is tending towards Republicanism, and
government by the people, through their
:hosen representatives, and that our own
great republic is destined to be the guiding
itar to all others. Under our republic we
luppbrt an army less than that of any
Europe an power of any standing, and a navv
ess than that of either of at least five of
hem. There could be no extension of terri
oij on this continent which would cull for
noruae of this force, bat rather might snch
^tension enable ns to diminish it. Tho
heorj of government changes with the genral
progress. Now that the telegraph is
nade available for commuuicating thought
?together with rapid transit by steam?all
>artaof? contiuent, are made contiguous
or all purposes of government, and commuuiation
between the extreme limits of the
jountry made easier than it was throught
he old thirteen States at the begining of our
i ation al exiatence.
The effects of the late civil strife have
>eeu to free the slave and make bim a citi:en
; yet he is not possessed of the civil rights
vhich citizenship should carry with it. This
s wrong, and should be correoted. To this
correction I stand committed, so far as
Executive influence can avail. Social equalty
is not a subject to be legislated upon, nor
ihall I ask that anything be done to advance
he social status of the colored man except to
;ive bim a fair chance to develope what there
" 1 -? ?? 1? fr\ O^KaaIh
3 gOOO ID D11D, give aim bvv.sk w hvmw..,
ind when he travels let him feel assured
.hat his conduct will regulate, the treatment
hat he will receive.
The States lately at war with the General
uSovernment are now happily rehabilitated,
ind executive control is exercised in any
me of them, that would not be exercised in
iny other State, under like circumstances.
In the first year of the past administration,
Lhe proposition came up for the admission of
Santo Domingo as a territory of the Union-,
[twas not a question of my seeking, but was
i proposition from tho people of Santo
Domingo, and which 1 entertained. I believe
now, as I did then, that it was to the
interest of this country, the peoplo of Santo
Domingo, and all concerned, that the
proposition should be received favorably. It
iras, however, rejected, Constitutionally, and
therefore the subject was never brought up
again by me.
In the future, while I hold my present
office, the subject of the acquisition of territory
must have the support o f the people before
I will recommend any proposition looking
to such acquisition.
I say here, however, that I do not share
in the apprehension held by many as to the
douger oftbe government's becoming weakened
and destroyed by reason of the extcntion
of territory. Commerce, education and
rapid tranrit of thought and matter by telegraph
and steam, have changed all this.
Rather do I believe that our great Master is
preparing the world, in His own good time,
to become one nation, speaking one language,
and when armies and navies wili be no long*
* ? ?dE-?itihirn will
0r r?0juirco? i'ij courui iu vuc *u?uiv >* ?*.
bo dirootad to the restoration of good feeling
between tbe different! section of our common
country; to the restoration of our
commerce to a fixed value as compared with
the world's standard of values, gold, and if
possible to a par with it; to tbe construction
of cheap routes of transit throughout the
laud; to the end that the proceeds of all
sections may find a market and leave a living
? 4- to the
.rcmuneriuiuu iu m? juvmuv..., ? ?
maintenance of friendly relations with all
all our neighbors and with distant nations;
to the re-establishment of our oommerce and
a share in the carrying trade of the ocean ;
to the encouragement of such manufacturing
industries as can be economically pursued
in this country; to the end that the exports
of home products and industries my pay for
our imports?the only sure method ot returning
to and permanently maintaining a
specie basis; to the elevation of labor, and
by a humane course to bring the nborigines
of the country under the benign influences of
education and civilization. It is oither this
or a war of extermination. A war of extermination
engaged in by the people pursuing
commerce and all industrial pursuits is expensive
even against the weakest people, and
I <fom?dr?UiiDf and C>ur superiority
of strength and advatntages of civilization,
should make us lenient to tho Indian. The
wrong already inflicted upon him should be
taken into account, and the balance placed
to his credit. The moral view of the question
shonld be considered; and the question
asked, Cannot the Indian be made a useful
and productive member of society , by proper
teaching and treatment? If the effort is
made in good faith, we will stand better before
the civilized nations of the earth, and in
our own consciences, for having made it.
All these things are not to be accomplished
by one individual, but they will receive
my support, and such recommendations to
Congress as will, in my judgment, servo to
carry them into effect. I beg your support
and encouragement.
It has been and is my earnest desire to
correct abuses that have grown up in the civil
service of the country. To secure this reformation,
rules regulating the methods of
appointment and promotion were established
and have been tried. Mv efforts for such
reformation shall be continued to the best of
my judgment. The spirit of the rules adopted
will be maintained.
I acknowledge before this assembly, representing
as it does every section of our country,
the obligation I am under to my countrymen
for the great honor they have conferred
on me by returning me to the highest office
within their gift, and the further obligation
resting on me to render to them the best services
within my power. This I promise,
looking forward with the greatest anxiety to
the day when I shall be released from responsibilities
that at times are almost overwhelming,
and from which I have scarcely
had a respite since the eventful firing upon
Fort Sumter, in April, 1861, to the present
day. My services were then tendered and
accepted under the first call for troops growing
out of that event. I did not ask for place
and position and was entirely without influence
or the acquaintance of persons of in
flnence, but wan resolved to perfom my part
iu a struggle threatening the very existence
of the nation. I performed a very conscicn- 1
tious duty without asking any promotion or
command and without a revengeful feeling
towards any section or individual.
Notwithstanding this, throughout the war'
and from my candidacy for the present office
in 1868, to the close of the last Presidential
campaign, I have been the subject of abuse
and slander, scarcely ever equalled in political
history, which to-day, 1 feel that I can
afford to disregard in view of your verdict
which I gratefully accept as my vindication.
, . , .
Gen. K. M. Law.?Gon. E. M. Law. who
was distinguished as a gallant officer in the
Confederate army, left this place?which
has been his home for many years?on Mon- (
day last, and will make his future home at
Tuskegee, Ala., where he intends to engage (
in the business of planting. Previous to the
war, Gen. Law filled a Professor's chair in
the King's Mounntain Military School,
which position he resigned, rouioviug to Alabama,
and at the commencement of hostilities
entered the servico of that State as Lieutenant-Colonel
of the Fourth Alabama Regiment,
and by promotion attained the rank of
Brigadier General. Returning to a people
with whom he has been heretofore so intimately
associated, Gen. Law requires no
word of commendation ; while for his future
prosperity he has the well wishes of his
many friends in South Carolina.?YorkvilU
Enquirer.
The heaviest corn crop ever grown in the
United States was that of last year which
the Agricultural Report states at the huge
total of 1,100,000.000 bushels. Not only is
this the largest crop, but it is said to be corn
of better quality aud of greater intrinsic
value than usual. Iowa was the banner corn
growing State, her averasrc being nearly
forty-ono bushels an acre. Unfortunately
for some of those who would not like to havo
Iowa corn, it takes the price of four bushels
of said corn to get one bushel to the Atlantic
markets. This is ono of the reasons why
the people are demanding cheaper transportation
between the West and tho East.
The death of Dr. Lushington promises to
revive, for a brief period, the scandal about
Byron's separation from his wife that Mrs.
Ilarriet Beecher Stowe peddled to her own
profit in the sunt of about 850,000, and to
the disgust of all right-iuindcd people. Dr.
Lushingtpn died at the ago of 91 years, and
was a contemporary of Byron and the other
wits of his day. Indeed, it was he who was the
confidential adviser of Lady Byron at the
time trouble between her and her husband
occurred, and who said that her "dufy to
God and man" alike demanded that Bhe
should be separated from her husband. Later,
when there was some effort to bring
about a reconciliation, Dr. Lushington refused
to aid it, and it is due to this circumstance
that nothing came of the negotiations.
At the time of Mrs. Stowe's scandalous publication
in the Atlantic, and subsequently of
the same nuked nastiness long drawn out in
tho form of a book. Dr. Lushington was appealed
to to come forward and put the question
to rest; but as the information came to
him in a capacity doubly fiduciary, that of a
personal friond and a professional adviser,
lie very properly refused With his death
the possibility ceases ttiat nil tho doubts as
to tlie cause ot tno separatum U1 JiUlU it II Li I
Lady Byron will ever be removed, utiles*,
which is scarcely possible, he has left behind
him some statement of what he knew
about the affair.
An Iowa doctor, last week, thoughtlessly
lanced a pimple on a patient's noso with his
vaccinating lancet. It took beautifully, hut
the patient says that both for appearance
and comiort he would almost as lief have the
tfmaJl-jftx.
Antiquity of the Scriptures.
Few of us ever stop to think how old the
Bible is. Yet "the Scriptures are believed
by candid critics to contain the most ancient
forms of truth now known to men." With
the aid of chronological tables, any one may
easily make profitable comparisons between
the antiquity of the books and that of other
writings and events. The Scriptures contain
the only authentic history of the world
before the flood. We find in the Pentateuch
one or two stanzas of poetry composed in
the antediluvian period. The Hebrew
statutes were enacted a thousand years be
fore Justinian reformed the Roman jurisprudence.
In the Bible wo have the record of
chartered rights secured to the peoplo more
than two thousand years before the Magna
Charts.
What a sensation would be produced if
the first chupter of Genesis should appear for
tho first time in one of our newspapers tomorrow!
Yet there can bo no doubt that
chapter contains the oldest writing, twentyfive
hundred years before the invention of
printing.
Xenophon's record of the conversations of
Socrates, in his Memorabilia, seems an old
book to us, yet similar topics wore discussed
in Ecclesiastes six hundred years before.
The works of Tacitus, Plutarch and Quintilian
are not modern, yet the books of the New
Testament are older than they.
. At to tho book of Job, its age is beyond
conjeoturo. Those who make it as modern
as they can are compelled to place its origin
at least one thousand years before Homer.
When Priam was king of Troy, Job was of
remote antiquity. The namo of Alexander
hai no modern sound for us, yet when AlexQn?in
V?n KaaL' nf .TnK mitrhf.
uuuui iuvuucu kjj i tuj viaw wv? vi vw
have been read before him as the work of an
author more time-honored then than the
name of Alexander is now.
The writings ofConfuciusare modern compared
with most of the Bible ; and the most
that the Hindoos cau justly claim for their
saered books, the Vedas, is that they were
written five hundred years after the death of
Moses. The Koran is a book fresh from
the press compared with the Scriptures.
Dr. Upton.
Deaths in the Great Minnesota
Snow Storm.?There has either been a
a great misapprehension of facts on the part
of the Minnesota papers and of the correspondents
generally regarding the number of
lives lost by the terrible snow storm which
swept over that State ou the 7th,of last Janv*?y,
or elae efforts are being made by the
>fortne*rt* vmitherit-ies 4o co?w?eaiithe true
loss. It will be remembered that immediately
after the storm the accounts given by
f?n?l CnnllAU ftf f hfl lllSS
pVlOVlia 41 vui viiv ovvuvu vi >mv -
of life placed the list of the frozen among
tho hundreds. Names, places and circumstances
were given which bore every appearance
of having been the truth, allowing even
for the natural tinge of exaggertion which
might have been expected from the excitement
that prevailed. Now, however, the
report of the Storm Commissioner, appointed
by Governor Austin on January 4, to
make a personal examination into the circumstances
of the casualties in the storm, is
in, and only eighteen assured and two supposed
cases of freezing have been found, nnd
these were in Blue Earth, Faribault, Martin,
Jackson, Nobles, Rock, Pipestone, Cottonwood,
Watouwau, Brown, Nicollet, Le
Sueur and Murray Counties, in South-western
Minnesota. Of these twenty, eight were
frozen in Watouwan C'ointy, four in Martin
County, three in NobLa County, one each
Faribault, Browu, Cottonwood and Nicollet,
and two in Blue Earth County. If this be
the sum total of the loss of life, however unfortunate
it may be, the Minnesota papers
erred in giving false impressions of the number
of those who had fallen victims to the
fury of the storm.
A Stranoe Monster.?A gentleman recently
from the Shclton, Laurel district of
North Carolina, some forty miles from this
place, informs us that the people in that
"densely thicketcd" country are greatly excited
in regard to the appearance, upon
scverul different occasions, and in several
different places, of a huge mountain monster,
the speices of which is unknown. Mr.
George Anderson one of the gentlemen residing
in the Laurel country, being one of
the persons who saw the monster, also
furnishes us with the following description
ui 11/;
"I was out in tho junglo hunting up some
lost hogs, when all of a sudden there came
into my path a beast, the appearauce of
which, I must confess, caused me to quake
for the first time in many years. Aside
froiu its strange and unusual appearance^ tho
unearthly yell it uttered on preceiving me,
which reverberated and reverberated through
the forest, was enough to shake the senses of
the most daring adventurer. The animal
was some hundred yards distant from mc,
and appeared to be a huge black bear with
mane und head like a lion, but had horns
like an elk upon it. Its tail was long and
bushy, with dark and light rings around it
to its extremity. Its eyes gleamed like a
panther's, and its size was that of an ordinary
ox but somewhat longer. Just previous to
making its appearance I liaa anot on m* s?..
ut u (quarrel, and felt little prepared to meet
such a ferocious boast without any weapon of
defense. I immediately set about reloading
my rifle, but had scarcely bciruu when it
started toward me. 1 retreated in as good
order as possiblo, and must say I did some
good running?not looking back until 1 had
reached an open spot, when I found the animal
had disappeared in the Laurel thicket.
This is no story. Mr. Editor, gotten up to
searo naughty children. I nui not the only
one who has seen the monster?several have
seen it since I did ; and, as sheep and calves
i are lately missing, it is presumed to be a
1 carniverous bruto. Many have fortified their
: homes to prevent a night attack from the
i strange monster, the like of which was never
1 seen in these mountains before. Some think
; it has escaped from some rambling menagerie,
while others superstitiously think it is sent
to warn people of some great approaching
danger.?JoneshoroTwin. Eaylr and Advertiser.
Home Adorning.
j '
The best adornment which any one, however
knowing or skillful or active can bring
to any habitation is a uniformly cheerful,
smiling face, and the loviag spirit which irrrdiates
it. That brings sunshine within
the household, better than anv which can
come from without, and peace to its happy
possessor, as well as to all beholders. One
who bears within him, wherever he goes, a
genial and generous disposition, a benign aspect,
kind words and gentle manners, with,
when tenderly appropriate, the sweet influence
of golden silence also, possesses a degree
of mortal beauty which reflects itself
to all eyes, from everywhere arouad him.?
The home, where such a one goes out aud in,
at morning and at evening, is to the weary,
aching hearts of others the very gate of
heaven.
Butthere?are physical, intellectual, artistic
and moral adornments that belong to a
perfect home?to the preparation of which,
in the end, all tho growing family history
should, at all times, powerfully tend. Even
a plain home can be made to have an air of
universal welcome in it, by scrupulous neatness
and order, and by a few trailing vines
without, and summer flowers within, and
with plenty of light and air in its scanty
apartments.
In most homes, in these privileged days,
engravings can be, at least a few of them,
easily obtained, to be hung upon the walls or
placed for more careful aud studious observation,
in well-kept portfolios. Stereoscopes
are cheap and promotive in their way of the
aesthetic enjoyment and culture of a family.
| Music cau be brought iu some form to lend
I - -i a. _? * ?f
. US cuaruis lU lUU UMUJUJUI1 tcuuo ui iciuiuj
gladness. Pleasing effects can be secured
by a little skill in adapting colors to each
other, in the choice of carpets, wall paper
and furniture, and in their harmonious disposition.
Much do books, choice books,
grace auy home, or any hand in which they
are found. A home, however lavishly garnished
with wealth or art, and all the more
so for any such pleasing and gratifying contrast,
seems to be utterly tame and spiritless
to oue visiting it, who finds it void of books,
or of all books but those which are cheap,
and frivolous. Even a newspaper or monthi
ly magazine of any character, lying around
i in a house, advertises the fact at once, that
: there is some intellectual vitality within its
walls, and that mere material things do not
| shut out all higher thoughts from the hearts
i of its inmates.
Why Auat Sallie Never Married.
"Now, Auut Sallie, do please tell us why
you never got married. You remember you
said once that when you were a girl, you was
engaged to a minister, and promised you
would tell us about it sometime. Now, aunt,
please tell us."
"Well, you see when I was about seventeen
years old I was living in Uticn, in the
State of New York, though I say it myself.
1 was quite a good lookiug girl then, and
had several beaux. The one that took my
Ain/?V tvne n rntinrr minister- a verv Dromisinir
C..V.J J B_ ? r .. ^
young man, mid remarkably pious and steady.
Ho thought a good deal of me, and I kind of
to hiui, and things went on until we were
engaged. One evening he camo to me and
.put his arms around mo, and kind of hugged
uic, when I got excited and some flustrated
It was a long time ago, and I don't know
but what I might have hugged back a little.
I was like any other girl, aud pretty soon I
pretended to be mad about it. and pushed
him awav. though I wasn't mad a bit. You
must know that the house where I lived was
on one of the back streets of the town.?
There were glass doors in the parlor, which
opened on the street. These doors to, I stepped
back a little from him, and when he
un close I Dushed him harder than 1
intended to; and don't jou think, girls, the
poor fellow lost his balancfc and fell through
one of the doors into the street."
"Oh, Aunty! Was he killed ?"
"No. He fell head first, and as he was
going I caqght him by the legs of his trousers.
I held on for a minute and tried to
pull him back, but his suspendeis gave way,
and the poor young man fell clear out of his
pantaloons into a parcel of ladies and gentlemen
along the street."
"Uh ! Aunty! Aunty ! Lordy!"
"There, that's right; squall and giggle as
much as you want to. Girls that can't hear
a little thing like that without tearing around
the room and he-he-iug in such a way, don't
know enough to come in wheu it rains. A
nice time the man who marries one of you
will have, won't he? ' Catch me telling you
anything again."
"But, Aunt Sally, what became of him ?
Did you ever see him again ?
"No; the moment he touched the ground
he got up and left that place in a terrible
hurry. I tell you it was a sight to uo remembered.
How that man did run ! lie
went out "West, and 1 believe he is preaching
out in Illinois. Hut he never married.
He was very modest, and I suppose he was
so badly frightened that time, that he never
dared trust himself near a woman again.?
That, girls, is the reason why 1 never married.
I felt very bad about it for u long
time?for he was a real good man, and 1 |
have often thought to myself that we should
have been very happy if his suspenders hadn't
given way."
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OUR OHIP-BASKET
Words that burn?fire and blazes.
A Chicago paper speaks of a suicide as a
fool-killer.
Be temperate in diet; our first parents ate
themselves out ot house and home.
A country editor reports money close, but
not close enough to be reached.
What is that which has its head at one
end and its mouth at the other ? A river.
The man^who tried to sweeten his tea with
one of his wife's smiles, has "fallen tback on
sugar."
No person should sleep alone in cold weather
except widows. The bible hath said
the "widow's mite."
A young lady of 16, who had worn short
dresses, positively told her mother she would
wear them no longer.
A librarian, arranging his books according
to their subject matter, put "Irish bulls"
under tho head of agricultural.
In Detroit if you ask a grocer for burning
fluid he hands you a bottle of old rye
neatly labelled and ready for use.
A Dutch lady in Ohio, writes over the
signature of Wilhelmina Juliette Charlotte
Apolloblundcrruberblesthenthunger.
" I came near selling mv boots the other
day," said John to a friend. " How so?"
| " Well, I had them half-soled."
1 A young man at a party one evening being
asked if he could play the harpsicord, wanted
to know if it was anything like seven-up.
Mrs. Snidkins says her husband is a three
haneed man?right hand, left hand, and a
little behind hand.
A Kentucky grocer has over his stall this
impressive moral injuuetion : "Any man or
boy that takes one Apel without Leafe is a
little rogue in his harte."
We are told that "the evening wore on,"
but we are not told what she wore on that
occasion. Was it the "clothes" of a summer's
day?
t
" I hate to hear people talking behind
one's back," as the robber said when the constable
was chasing him and crying, "Stop
thief!"
An Alabama editor has found a new premiuln
toofier to subsoribers. lie will name'
his new boy for the patron who pays for his
subscription the longest time in advance.
A merchant iu Topcka recently lost $450
in cash. As his with and one of his clerks
have not been seen since, ho is appreheusive
that they were murdered for his money.
In the mountainous districts in the extreme
east of Hungary, at this season of the
year, a fair is held of the luarriageblc young
men and women.
An enthusiastic Nebraska editor says,
" Nine months of the year in Nebraska is
summer, and the rest is mighty late in the
spring."
A Milwaukee - ladv had several hundred
dollars worth of point laco clipped off her
clothing by a thief while she was at church
singing ' Strip uic of the robe of pride;
clothe me in humility."
There have teen many definitions of a
gentleman, but the prettiest and most pathetic
is that given by a young lady. "A
gentleman," says she, " is a human being
combining a woman's tenderness with a wouinn's
courage."
A Chicago editor, upon lean ing that
New York sewing women only get four cents
for making a pair of pants, wrote a halfcolumn
editorial on the meanness of man, and
offered to pay five ceuts rather than to seo
the women suffer.
A dentist not a thousand miles from Bristol,
Conn., was recently extracting a tooth
from a young man under the influence of
touching gas, when he (the young man) suddenly
became uncontrollable, and, jumping
from the chair, ran with full speed down the
street, the dentist calling at the top of his
voice, ''Stop him he's full of gas!"
Nothing makes a Minnesota husband so
mad as to fill his boots with buckwheat cakea
in the raw, and then laugh at him when ho
pulls them on. Mrs. Suiith of Winoa, will
indorse this statement as soon as the swelling
on her nose subsided sufficiently to enable
her to read.
A Hartford subscriber writes that he is
just recovering from small-pox, and will bo .
on in a few days to renew his subscription.
We hope he won't mind a little thing like
that. We will send the paper and wait for
themony. Wo will wait cheerfully. We
ain't of that avaricious kind of people who
will grab for money as if for life. We despise
such things. There's no earthly reason for
his qpuiing on; we will wait.?Danbvry
Xtic.i.
Josh Hillings was asked, ' How fast does
'sound travel ? His idea is that it depends a
good deal upon the noise you arc talking
about. "The sound of a dinner-horn, for instance,
travels half a mile in a second, while
an invetashnn tew git up in the morning I
1 * i
have known to DC > quarters uv an nour
goin' 2 pair of stairs, and then not hev
strength cnuff left to be heard."
Endeavor to do your work quietly. Anxiety
and over action are always the causes of .
illness and restlessness. Wc must use our
judgment to control our excitement, or our
bodily strength will break dawn. We must
V.^%. K.^f Am* <">im Itahlf) it fii Ko vnn
rCIIU'UIUVI UIUV UUI W?? vwv%.v in .V MV ?.VM
by a strength not our own. It is a battle
that does not depend on the swift nor upon
the strong.