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, 1 1 , " I- jm?mmm?mnmrn uJ; t r.:t qiuji'. t: VOL. XXXII. CAMDEN. H. C-, TIIT RSDAY(i.IANTTARY JO, 1873. NO. SO 1 ' TBI CAMD1M JOBHAL ' AN INDEPENDENT FAMILY PAPER pr*LisHiD BY JOHN KERSHAW. SUBSCRIPTION RATES One year, in advance $2 50 Six months 1 50 Three months df Transient Advertisements must be paid or in advance. A CITY OF THE PLAIN. From the Denver (Col,) New*, December 19. 1 TBI TALI AN AEIZONA TRAVELER TELLS? Rb INS 0? A ONCE POPULOUS CITY. Col. W. T. Roberts, who went down to Arizona with the Mike Gray parfyjhunting J after diamonds and things, had some won- ( derful stories to detail upon his arrival home, concerning the land through which he passed, the people he saw, hardships endured by the party, and discoveries made. The ' parties started for Arizona from Denver, 1 outfitting at Paebla. j Beyond the San Joan Rivor, to the southward and westward, they eame into a dee- 1 ? ? ^.IJ perace loosing unmnaotiea region, senium trod by foot of civilimd mas, and ah tinned by the indians. It consist* of a succession ? of elevated plateaus, covered by sand and cut up by deep, impamable gorges cut out in the sandstone by the heavy rains which prevail there. On the top of many of these metas is a scanty growth of nut-pine and scrubby cedar, while others are covered with bunches of grass, upon which the wild sheep, in greet numbers,'fatten. There is s no water in all these regions, except iu the j: deep holes washed out at the bottom of tho *" canon, and gorges washed by the winter f torrents, where the water stands and grows , stagnant under the scorching summer sun. _ For miles and miles, further than the eye can teach, these barren wastes stretch in a n continuous succession of desert table lands D and yawning chasms. Tm party were repeatedly lost on the last 1! trip, none of them knowing the trail, and keeping, as was wrong, on the tops of the mesaritostead of is the valleys. At one time ( they wandered fourteen dayn without the least idea of where they were going, and ? suffering greatly for water. At ene period 1 of their wanderings they were thirtv-si^ hours without water, and nearly perished of f thirst. They travelled until many of their 1 mules gave out and several of the men de- f' clared they could go no further. Captain 1 Grey, Col. Roborte and Ben Harpending, a p ni>nha? nf A Harnendinc. rode on a short "vf"v" ? ? I o> _ distance, and fortunately found a pool of water, which provod the salvation of the P,1 entire party. They traveled on day after . day, resolutely struggling against despair, and finally, by good fortune, fouud a way out of the desert. Roberts tells a strange story of a strange 1 city?or the remains of otie?away down ai there in that desolate land, it was while P attempting tc find his way out of the gorges P into which the party had stumbled, that Roberta came out upon a mesa, and was astonished to find before him the ruins of what a was onoe evidently a populous city. It co- an vered an area of about three square miles, ov and wa? enclosed by wall of sand and f? stone, neatly quarried and dressed, ten or ^ twelvo feet high, and which, judging by the debris, was fifteen or twenty feet high be- , u fore its tall. In most places it had crumbled . away aad fallen, and was covered with sand, ln but In tnjmy places it was standing six or a eight ft. above the sand banks which had driftted around it. The entire area inside of thia Had at nne time been covered with ,. houses bailt on aoli! sand stone, which 1K ? * ' *111 showed excellent masonry in their construe- , tion. This ancient city is situated in Ari- I tuna, ninety miles from the boundary line of Utah and Arizona, and the same distance; ' from the western Colorado line. It has the appearance of being an old Aztec city that baa been deserted for hundreds of years and fallenAo ruins. It is entirely stone, and not , a stick of worked timber is to be seen among the raius. Nothing but the walls are stand- v5 ing, and none of them are now left more "T" than eight or ten feet above the sand, which ^ is eight or ten feet deep. The walls still bear traces of many hieroglyphics, cut deep into them, showing various Indian customs ![ and superstitions. There are also the ruins :a of stately monuments, built of square block ^ sandstone, well squarred, and showing good rc masonry, which are worked with notches PJ and crosses cut into them at regnlar inter- ^ of Till. The city is covered with sand, which, it is ai thought, was blown there from the desert. ni The sand has become solid and packed by jj' the rains. Under the sand is a bine clay J" six qr eight feet doep. No bones, imple- . ments or relics of any kind were found, with the exception of some pottery of dark color. These were embellished with paintings of . flowers and ornamental figures in blue co- jl lore. The coloring matter is of a blue mineral substance of some kind. It is perfectly 111 indelible, and pieces of the pottery which tr have been exposed to storms which have worn away the solid masonry of the walls of the city, show their colors fresh and bright so to all appearances as when new. The pot of tery itself has been found to be perfectly ra fire-proof, when tried in crucibles and fur- Si naces. p< After the discovery of the city, which, by fc the way, Roberts was the only "one to see, m the party moved on. Afterward one of the pi explorers was lost, and wandered without st food several davH. He finally made his way u to Defiance, ana then fonnd his companion*, tc Story of tuf. Poor Little Stephen s( Girard.?The man lives in Philadelphia Sl who, when young and pooor, entered a bank, and aayshe "Please sirdon'tyou wantaboy?" And the stately personage said. "No, little boy. I don't wan't a littld boy." The little d boy. whose heart was too full for utterance, * chewing a piece of licorice stick he had bought with a cent stolen from his good and a ... ?'l I J ( pious aunt, with subs plainly audible, ana i * with great globules of water rolling down his I cheeks, glided silently down the marblestcpB s of the bank. Bending his noble form, the ; * bank man dodged behind a door, for he ! < thought the little boy was going* to ahy a t stone at him. But the little boy picked up ' something and stuck it in his poor ragged I jacket. "Come here, little boy," and tho i little boy did come here, and the bank man ' said, "Lo, what pickest thou up?" And be ' awnrewd tod replied, " a pin;" and the bank < man said, "How do yon vote?recuse me. you go to Sunday school?" and lie said he did. Then the bank man took d <wn a pen made of pnre gold and flowing with pure ink, and he wrote upon a piece of paper, "St. Peter." and he asked the little boy what that stood for, and ho said ''Salt Peter" Then the bank man said it meant 'Saint Peter." And the little boy said, 14 Oh!" Then the bank man took the little boy to his bosom, and the little boy said " Ob!" igain, for he squeezed him. Then the bank nan took theHttle boy into partnership and ?ave him halfthe profits all the capital, and le married the bank man's daughter, and low all he lias is all his, and all his own too. STORY OF ANOTHER LITTLE ilOY. My uncle told me this story, and I spent ix weeks nicking up pins in front <>f a bank. [ expected the bank man would call me in md aav " Little boy, are you good?" and I raagoing to say "Tea;" and when he askod ne what " St. John" stood for, I was going 0 say " Salt John." Bat I gneas the bank nan wasn't anxious to have a partner, and guess the daughter was a son, for one day ays he to me, "Little boy what's that you're ticking up?" Says I, awful meekly, "Pins." lays he," Let's see 'em." And he took 'em. nd I took off my cap all ready to go in the tank and become partner, and marry his aughter. But I didn't get an invitation. Ie said, "Those pins belong to the bank, nd if I catch you hanging around horo any jore, I'll set the dog on you!" Then I left, nd the mean old cuss kept the pins. Sach 1 life ss I find it.?Mark Twain. Private CoRRKSPONDENCK.-*-The folding letter from a probable future Preaient to his sister, which is going tlie rounds f the newspapers, is classified as an Epistoiry Effort: ?? " TLa ia nil rr -\t tVo orv!^ JL/CAK Ut r4?? 1 1IU I1UIQC0 10 uit i*uv v|/iramie very badly. Us boys bad so much urn the other day! Little Frank's had glue unnin' out of his noee, po we knew he had ;, and we t ok him into the bath room, and ot 6omc o; ma's fine towels and wrapt #his gs up in hot wator, and burned sulphur latches un ler his throat, and swinged his tanc off and the paint came off his legs, and rank can't ride him any more. Wasn't it >l)y? Then the matches put us in mind of iving a B ston fire, so we coaxed sister ?die to giv" us her box of Swiss h mses you , ought he. from Urip; and we set 'em up , id touched'em off, and let'er rip. The , wn went like blazes, and we thro red some ( sis's dolls in for dead bodis, and the saved , e arms and legs for trofvB. , But you bet we got scared when the > rnes went so high, we turned on the hose, j d that fooj Jim Blain let the wa; it ran all j cr the floor and down the kitchen on the ok's head, and she thought the pipes had ( isted, run for a man to fix 'cot, so ma ( ugbt us in there, and the boys run home, j it I got a thrashing. It didn't hurt much ( tuse I had on thick clothes. Our Frank is 1 ( pants. He went in last Sunday. I've got ( new girl. I don't like Jennie ilird any , y jre, cause when I give her a h ndful of anuts she throwed 'em in my fine, and I ( pect Jim Blnin told lies about me. I'd k him. only his father keeps a candy store, d I get ail the candy I want for nothin'. Your affectionate brother, Ciiart.es. P. S.?Ph ase brine: mc a goat. j A Littei: Composition on Wheelbar)\VB?The Danbury Xewsman sa\ s :lfyou ive occassi n to use a whcelbarr< v leave it, hen you are through witlr^t, in front of e house with the handles toward the door, wheel barrow is the most complicated ingto fall over on the face of the earth, man would fall over one when he would iver think of falling over anything else, e never knows when ho has got through llingover it, either; for it will tangle hii gs and his arms, turn over with him and ar up in front of him, and just as he tuses in his profanity to congratulate himIf, it. takes a new turn and scoops more skin f of him, and he commences to cvolute lew and bump himself in fresh places. A an never ceases to fall over a wheelbarrow itil it turns completely on its back, or 'ings up against something it cannot upset. . is the most inoffensive looking object thero j , but it is more dangerous than a loeomovc, and no man is secure with ono unless j i has a tight hold of its handles and is sit- { ng down, on something. A wheelbarrow , is its uses, without doubt, but in its leisure ( omcnts it Is the greatest blighting curse on ( ue dignity. ~ i An Atlan a wife, whose patience had been rely tried by the continued drunkenness ' her hush, nd, an employee of oi.e of the lilroad sho; s, went out on her muscle last aturday. Before she returned she had funded tl e proprietor of a whi key shop ir selling lor husband liquor, slightly puinicll d the 1 ireman of the railroad shop for ivine her 1 usband his earnings v hllo in a J o # # -. , ate of intctication, returning home in trimph with ier hand in the collar of her indicated lo d. This is certainiy a more vigrous warf'a e than any of our t. mperance jcieties ha introduced, and w j are not are if not vastly more effectual in certain aaes. Curious and Useful Crow ?J. Snyler, of Vir Lna, owns a crow wli ch serves is a substit ,ite for dogs, cats and all other lomestic sentinels. He destroys very frog ibout tho well; allows a mouse 10 chance or his lih; drives away hawks from the wultry, and bids fair to a i tho best iquirrei ao" in me country, i c reauny pies the squirrel, either upon tli fence or >n the tree-, and with a natural antipathy x) the Bnuiirel tribe, hit* shrill, k< *n note is eadily detected hy his owner, a' -ompanied jy rapid darts up and down,- and the owner s thus led to his uatne. The me? t reinark>le feature about the crow is tin t ho inva iably keep five or six days' ra'ions ahead >f time, well concealed. DUELLING. Apropos of'duelling and duels, which arc becoming too prevalent in this section, Mark Twain contributes the following in the interest of humanity : The only merit that I can claim for the followiug narrative is that it is a true story. It has & moral at the end of it, but I claim nothing on that, as it is merely thrown in to curry favor with the religious element. After I had reported a couple of years on ' the Virginia City (Nevada) Daily Enterprise. they promoted me tho editor-in-chief?and lasted just a week, by the watch But T made an uncommon lively newspaper while I lasted, and when I retired I had a duel on my hands and three horse-whippings promised me. i ne inner i maae no aitcmpu vj ouilect; however, this history concerns only the former. It was the old "flush times" of the silver excitement, when the population was wonderfully wild and mixed; everybody went armed to the teeth, and insults had to be atoned /or with the best article of blood your system could furnish. In the course of my editing I made trouble with a Mr. Lord, editor of the rival paper. Ho flew up about some little trifle or other that I said about him. I do not remember now what it was. I suppose I called him a thief, or a bodysnatcher, or an idiot, or something like that. I was obliged to make the paper readable, and I could not fail in my duty to a whole community of subscribers merely to save the exaggerated sensitiveness of an individual. Mr. Lord was offended, and replied vigorously in his paper. Vigorously meanB a great deal when it refers to a personal editorial in a frontier newspsiper Duelling was all the fashion among the upper classes in that country, and very few gentlemen would throw away an opportunity of fighting one. To kill a person in a duel caused a man to . be even more looked up to than to kill two f men in the ordinary way. Well, .out there , if you abused a man and that man did not j like it. you had to call him out and kill him; otherwise you would be disgraced. So I challenged Mr. Lord, and I did hope he would not accept; but I knew perfectly well that he did not want to fight, and so I challenged him in the most violent and implacable manner. And then I sat down and suffered and suffered till the answer came. All our boys?the editors?were in the office ' helping" me in the dismal business, and telling about duels, and discussing the code J with a lot of aged ruffians who had experience in such things, and altogether there was a loving interest taken in the matter ] which made me unspeakably uncomfortable. I rhe answer came?Mr. Lord declined. Our 1 t>oys were furious, and so was I?on the sur- " 'ace. I sent him another challenge, and another r rnd another; and the more he did not tlant ? o fight the bloodthirstier I became. But at apt the man's tone cbSnged. He appeared o be waking up It was becoming apparent ( hat he was going to fight mo, a(\er all. I ,| mght to have known how it would be?he vas a man who could never be depended ,H lpon. Our boys were exultant. I was not. '' though I tried to be. It was now time to go ont and practice. [t was the custom there to fight duels with F iavy six-shooters at fifteen paces?load and ?mply till the game for the funeral was se- ' lured. We went to a little ravine just out- , tide of town, and borrowed a barn door for 1 target?borrowed it of a gentleman who was ( ibsent?and we stood this bam door up, and 1' stood a rail on end against the middle of it represent Lord, and put a squash on top t )f the rail to represent his head. lie was a P s'ery tall, lean creature, the poorest sort of f material for a duel?nothing but a line shot n ;ould -fetch" him. and even then you might split your bullet. Exaggeration aside, ihe r ail was, of course, a little too thin to repre- 8 sent his body accurately, but the squash was i ill right. If there was any intellectual dif Terence between the squash and his head it tvas in favor of the squash. g Well, I practiced and practiced at the barn ? ioor. and could not hit it; and I practiced at the rail, and conld not hit that; and I tried I bard for the squash, and could not hit the " squash. I would have been entirely dis- [ bearteqed, but that occasionally I crippled c me of the boys, and that encouraged uie to bopc. t At last we began to hear pistol shote near * by, in the next ravine. We knew what?that u meant. The other party were out practicing \ too. Then I was in the last degree distress- r ed; for, of course, thoso people would hear ? our shots, artd they would send spies over the ridge, and the spies would find my barn ? door without a wound or a scratch, and that [ would simply be the end of me?for of course, i that other man would immediately become as * bloodthirsty as I was. Just at this moment ' a little bird, no larger than a'sparrow, flew ' by and lit on a sage bush, about thirty paces away; and my little second, Steve Gillis. who : was a matchless marksman with a pistol? < much better than I was?snatched out his 1 revolver, and snot tne Diru s ne&a on. ?vo ] all ran to pick up the game, and sure enough, ; just at this moment some of the other duel- t ists came reconnoitcring over the little ridge. They rau to our group to see what the mat- 1 tor was; and when tfocy saw the bird. Lord's ' second said: "That was a splendid shot. ' How far was it ?" Steve said with some indifference: "(lh. no great distance. About thirty pa1A(I ft C6R. "Thirty paces 1 Heavens alive, who did it?" | ".)/</ man?Twaiu." The mischief he did! Can lie do that of- , ten ?" i "Weil?yes. He can do it about?well about four times out of five." . , I know the little rascal was lying, but 1 never ^aid anytcing. I never told hitu so. He jras not of a disposition to invite eonfidenee of that kind, so 1 let the matter rest. Hut it was a comfort to see those people look siek, and see their under jnws drop, when Stove made these sentiments. They went off and got I^ord, and took him home; [ and wlieu we got home, half au hoar later. % there was a note iying that Mr. Lord per- j i (mtorily declined to fight. 1 It was a narrow r escape. We found out i afterward that Ldrd had hithisinark thirteen . times in eighfeennfliots. If he had put those 1 fourteen bullets through me it wonld have i narrowed mv sphere of usefulness a great i deal?would have well nigh closed it, in fact. ( True, they could havo put pogB in the holes, i and used me for a hat-rack; but what is a < hat-rack to a man who feels he has intellec- 1 tual powers J I would scorn such a posi- t tion. ; '" s I have written this true incident of my f personal histry for one purpose, and that pur- i pose only to warn the youth of the day t against the pernicious practice of duelling, c and to piead With them to war against it. If j the remarks and suggestions I am making i can be of any service to Sunday school teach- c .era and newapapele interested in the moral { progress of society, they are at liberty to use them, and I shall even be grateful to bays them widely d nominated. so that they may t do aa much good as possible. I was young V and foolish when F challenged that gentle- t! man, and I thought it' was very fine and ]j very grand to be a duelist, and sUod upon ? the "field of honor." But I am older and 0 more experienced now, and am inflexibly op- e posed to the dreadfal custom. I think it is a every man's duty to do everything he ean to tl discourage duelling. I always do it now; I ti discourage it on every occasion. tl If a man were to ohalenges me now?now tt that i can folly appreciate the iniquity of h that practice?I ijould go to that man. and * take him by tha hand, and lead him to i j quiet, retired room?and kill him. - . f( ~zr? ?' m. A Britis* Claim for Computation. ai ?The following amusing equib is from the k< London Punch. Mr. Punch, considering it ol his duty to step forward at tho present mo* p< rnent, and to suggest nn ea?y and honorable cj srrangement of the American question, has ol prepared the following schedule of English ]i< claims for compensation. It is manifest that oc they are all absolutely just, and he is sure p< that the Angric&u Government will admit so that fact. Therefore, all that remains to be si: lone is this iftiet Mr. Hamilton Fish anpeud ca lis signatttrland the words, *'All rq?nt!" ai he might a& "old boss," or not, as ho may su hink the American nation would desire.) ind then thf two governments have but to sxehange receipts for their respective claims: A Her Majrtty'b Government Claim* Com pen- vi, tsativ)i 01 ? a. (1. oo For twentyjrsarsof vio- fr ent abuse poured Upon England by 7%f JitK YurL Pl ifernld in the Interests of 4 la very, and. up to the date hi vhen the editef of that pa- V( >er was informed that he .] ?.ii ... v. i.._ > :ri.? 1 ?-?'V ""r u srwaswEfr--'"- *??* For similar nbrtae, in cl lobody'a interest In par- ar icular, since the abote to late, 0 0 0} ? For encouraging Fenians ^ nd putting Canada in P0 Iread of a Fenian inva- a ol on, ' 0 fl OA he For permitting the Irifli * he tmericun press to abuse , . inglnnd, . 0 0 0} For inducing many per- ,ni ona to use the word w< 'reliable" instead of 'trustworthy," 50,000,000 0 0 0 ag For allowing 0. F Train . p . _ no our enemy) to he out of a unatic asylum, 0 0 0 tu For the use of the work9 or f Ancient Engliah an- at hors, from Wm. ShaJie- f0] peare downwards, and . or calling them American uthors, 100,000,000 0 0 0 "1 For spoiling a great 00 lumber of decent second be ate English actors, and. ending them home with J he idea they were Keans ^ ot nd Kenibles, 0 7 ?>\ 06 For insulting the King's ne r Queen's English by sq peaking it for fifty years v lasally, * 20,000,000 0 0 0 ^ For eclipsing the harm- do nssgayety of nations by *r uddenly stopping the sup- di dy ofcnpifalhiggcr stories cl( ihich have now entirely eased. ' 1.000,000 0 0 0 For out raging humanity iy not annexing Mexico, nd putting an Ind to its po .trocities. 100.000,0000 0 0 fp] For putting us under obigation by the graceful eturn of that Arctic vcs- $6 el, "Thy Love is Worth'* 1,000,000 0 0 0 cr For attempting to de- wj troy the monarchial priniples of H. R. II. the 00 'rince of Wales, by treatng him with so much rtc 'imlnouQ and k start i I n 12#?? hat U. R. II. wu induced p. o think well of Rcpublianistn, 100,000,000 0 0 0. For persuading Mtn'lle. J? silsson to leave London kl or America, and for still letdining that songstress, 100,000 0 0 0 For inventing Ilerr ,l itreitinnnn, instead of leavng to some Englishman he honor of inventing hitn 100.000 O O O to For inccssautlj repro- wi lucing pictures from w f'imrh, and never nckuotvl- 0! xlging their source, No charge. . This is our bill. i;4-L2,200,0UU 8 4.J M A Great Discovery?A N?w FUEL.? A committee of citizciiB of San Francisco tr recently made and investigation of the pro- d> pcrties of a new article of fuel, discovered fc ni.il patented by a California invontor. The tn experiments were made in a brass foundry tl i>i the aouvc cny. ine At/aimi vanjormun p says: ft "They were shown into that portion of the ? establishment occupied by the furnaces, and S in one corner found a brick furnace some 1 eight feet long and six feet high. On the top of this was an iron tank holding about ten gallons, which was lilled with crude ? petroleum. From this tank, a pipe about an g inch and a half in diameter led into the aide a of the furnaro. A suiall jet of oil, sot larger * a -J?? * ? than a small goose quill, was permitted to Bow out of this tubo; a light is placed beneath this jet and immediately ignites. Another pipe about an inch in diameter leads from a steam boiler stationed some fifteen Poet away. This pipe leads a small jet of iteam upon the burning oil, and the moment -he steam strikes the oil the oxygen in the rater it set free and iginites with a tremend)U3 roar, generating in a few moments a most , ntense white heat. From this small source he entire chamber of the furnaoe, which is lome two feet by five feet, is filled with a -i lame so brilliant and dazzling that one canlotgaze on it for more than a moment at a . ime. This flame possesses all the heat of an 1 ?xy-hydrogen flame, and beneath its fierce jower the hardest metals melt in a fow 1 notnenta." The inventor claims that tha lost of this fuel for a furnace will not exceed t 12 for twenty-four hours. I Stoyis i* Railway Caieiagb.?With he Baltimore Sum, wu are of opinion that , he recent calamity at Corry, Peso., where he horrors of a railroad accident, with broken imbs and crushed bodies, were made doubly v d by the literally roasting alive of a oar fall o f passengers, ought at least to hare the , ffect of abolishing etovee in paeeenger care nd heating them by atoam. Accidents on j! be rail are sufficiently frecpient anddeetrucive of life, and in many instances beyond be avoidance of the greatest care; but cer- f linlv there is no neoeasity to keep a red u ot stove in one or both end* of a ear that t; ould be. certain, eran if no damaga were one by a collision or run-off, to be jostled ^ om its place, and in the confusion burn B nne one to death, especially when there re so many other entirely harmless ways of eeping the cur comfortable. It is the duty " f railroad companies, without regard to ex* * ?naA fn nca OWAWvt muana *V-A ?? V, v.wij ulbMIB HUK BVilCUin aUQ ire auggest to protect the safety and Jives cl ' passengers, and it is a duty that the pub- 01 c have a eight to demaod shall be performL At the late aeeident at Conry many u trsons were bnrfied to death whom it is readable to suppose were uDinjured or bat ~ ightly injured by thtf overturning of the ir; but, fastened in a car bottom aide up. . id both ends on fire, they were either is bothered or burned to death. ti U How a Pistol Indefinitely Postponed Wnddino.?There is absolutely no safe p] ny to carry a pistol except to carry it with- c< it a charge. A young man lost a wife re- q, ntly by trusting to the directions of a* ieDd who t ?ld him how he could carry a , stol without danger. His Mary Jane reded some distance from the city, and he r< id a great horror of does, ao he put his re- C( dver in the hip pocket of his Sunday othes one evening when be started to see in >r. The prospective mother-in-law met him ft the door and told him to take the rocking ai lair, and as he did so, the report of fire ms caused the old lady to scream and fall _ a? -u:t- - ' ? me uuui, nunc it ure in tne rear claimed ^ liarles Henry's attention and oonsnmed a ? rtion of his best doeskin " smalls." The w j lady swooned, tbe girl ran in, forgetting tr disordered dress and hair, and followed sr mother's example The old man and te s double -fisted boys ran in, and seeing nc other and daughter lyiong on the floor, re ;nt for that young man, and he went in rough the window, carrying sash and glass he went. A big dog, aroused by the j,( lisc, made for the fugitive, who, in his Wl rn, made for the city about a mile a half ^ two miles distant, emptying his revolver the deg as he went. The dog wss dead r that young man in more than one sense, . r he dare not approach the house now lest 10 e old man may revenge the loss of the dog f him. Had he shot only the old woman t?. i would have been forgiven, but the old / xn says he will never forgive the murder 01< his dor. If anv nn? ulri iK?t *? ? I?a? i likes Amanda Jane, he says that her g* irves are too delicate for a country girl, ?ii d betrays au anxiety to drop the subject, to it he oonfided to a friend tnat in sitting 0Q wn the hammer of his revolver caught the u m of the rocker, and it was in that way charged, whereupon that houae and his )thes became too hot for him. ! Ecantville([n<1.) Journal. hu to Made Him Pat.?When General Jackn was President a" heartless clerk in the . easury Department ran up an indebted- J. ?s to a poor landlady to the amount of >0, and then turned her off as he did other editors. She finally went to the President rth her complaint, and asked him if he . uld not compel the clerk to pay the bill ? 6 "He offers his note," ^he said; "hut his >to is good for nothing." 01 "Get his note and bring it to me," said the T( resident. n The clork gave her the note, with the w ering request that "she would let him iow when she got the money on it!" p< Taking it to the President, be wrote "An- tl ew Jackson" on the back of it, and told her ni ie would get tho money at the bank. hi When it becams due the olerk refused to C i pay the note, but when he learned who as tlie indorser, he made haste to "raise the ind." The next morning he found a note ^ i his desk, saying that his services were no ^ nger required by the Government?and it trved him right. ^ tl Susan B. Anthony recommends the down widen sisters to strike for high wagea for uties. The schedule suggested is so much >r every baby born. No grcenbaoks, no tj lore population, no uiore boys to carry on >e enterprises of the age. The scale of rices for muternal duties will perhaps be as * ?llows: (iirl babies, SI00; boy babies, 200; twin babies, SI100 ; twins, both boys, 11 400; triplets, $600; triplets, all boys. S l.mru. ti The man who was so laay that ho hired f n artist to draw his breath has found eon- p enial employment in a store that doea no R Jvertising. lie now oomplaina of want of 8 jmeUiiug to do. r ADVERTISING RATES, -1 ? -jBr ac*. ' '1M. 2 M.' 8 M. IV. If . i .. i ? 1k|W? 8 001 ft 00 8 00 13 60 lft ^ 2 aquarea 800 9 00 12 00 18 Otl #? ? I aquarea 9 0? 18 00 lfi 00 24 00 86 4 aquarea 12 00 16 00 20 00 80 00 48 3 I column 16 00| 19 00 24 00 84 00 60J* } column 20 OOj 80 00 40 00 66 00 90ffT 1 column 80 00] 60 00) 60 OOj 90 00)160^ All Traaalenf Advertisements will he ekargCi Ova Dollaa per Square for the ftrat aadSmeft rr-im Cbjitb p?T Square for iuk subaeqnaBt inaertion Single insertion, $1 60 pelr aquare. ~OTO OfflP-BASBET. The coming man?A waiter. Nature' tailoring?A potato patch. a Dad policy?Una tnat has expired. A powder mill?A duel with pistols. Common acenta?Musk and rirbcia. Mr. Yell is a loud-mouthed politician in Texas. Whan is a eat like a teapot? When jron're teasin' it. A Minnesota editor has organised himself into a brass band. Professor Pepper's principal assistant in tfr. Joseph Spice. A Buffalo wax-work man has worked otor he Duke of Wellington into Hedry M.Stan* ey. * The best preparation for hope, is a toad or wo in each hill. They will make the fines airly jtmp. The Countess of Skenna, a Swedish kdr, rill lead, in person, an expedttjen In fctm fDr. Livingstone. Provide***, Rhode bland, gentlemen streets hit wifo from wielding kltt before oiks by stealing bar false teeth. The married ladies of Hminibel, Me., here orated s "Come Home Husband Glub." It i shout four feet long sad has s brush ou lie end of it. Mrs. Partington reading of the strike of be wire drawers, remarked: "Ah, ma! what ew fongled things won't they wear sett ?' A Wheeling man is doing basinee< at the go of "Hooray, beans, sained ootn, eaaaod imstoee, buckwheat flour, rasoii." A guileless Banbury man saw a beautifhl bromo advertised "for fifty cents," sad seat a the money, and received the jadt of ehtbe. A Western editor triumahantly ttclaime: Man shall not lire by bread aloae," and then knowledges the receipt of i'jig of "old ourboa." A Conneetieut dog, whieh had run a task ito bis foot, went to the doctor's offiee oh tree legs and bad the hounded member at* udsd to. - a contest Detwsea tire pancake eaters took lace at Newton, N. J., recently. The soemful competitor demolished 68, and his lareat rival 60. A;l lady asked one of onr gentlemanly )ok-store elerka if he had ,:Feetna." MNo, iplicd the elerk; "but I'm afraid ? boil ia miing on the back of my neck." An Irishman, on being told that a newly* ivented store would save just half its usual iel, replied : "Arrah, than, I'll heve two, id save it all, my jewel." An aristocratic New York tailor ia eogaid in evolving a suit of clothp to consul itirefy of a cravat that will wind about the idy from neck to ankle, and be fastened ith a diamond pin. A father living in TitusviUe, who baa ro or three very eourtable girle, placed e >tice on his front door one night, whiok ad: " Shut down Tor thirty daya : no stove the parlor, and but one lam.p" . A lady about to marry Was warned that ir intended, aJtnougn a very good mam, w very eccentric. " Well/' mid eke, "if i ie very unlike other m?a he it likely to i a good husband." An impudent lawyer of New York, meet g a soldier with very fuH whiskers, said, ] say, my 'sar fellow, when are you go lag put your beard on a peace footing V*? Not until you plaee your tongue on Ike ril list," was the retort. "I wonder wither thoaeeloudsare going?" id a poetic eootributer to a awgadwe, peorely, as she pointed with her defecate lager the heavy misers that lotted in Ike sky ttside -the editord's window. "I think they e going to thunder," seid the editor. The boy that recommended a few drape of inegyric on sugar for the ehild of disquiedehas his autch in aaelher, whov after cceesfully spelling "chicaner?," defined it be a "large coop (o raise chickens." Physicians hear some queer diagnoses om a mate ares sometimes. Oar friend Dr. . was called recently to see a sick man, and ?n inquiring of his vifehowhewasaffeoti, reoeired in reply, "Well, you see, do?, r, the things what be-eats gits sorter taaglI around his heart, and he suffers awftil." A rural paper in Pennsylvania, in an obit* iry notice of Forrest, says: " She Was ne> r equalled in her time by any terpeieoan artist, though Bonfanti and Betty Bigi ere formidable rirala in her latter yean." These are the refreshing Western style of irsonals: " Mr. Waggoner found fault with le beef at s Memphis hotel, the other moring, and the ooroner made three dollars on im." " Peter Ink, and old cititen of Knox ouuty, Ohio, waa blotted out the other day, jed 75." u Willie," ftftitl ft aouog . parent, at toe reakfast table to ftn abridged edition *of imself, ft?d who had joit entered the grainier class at the high eehoo), M Willie, my ear. will you pau the butter?" "Tbirlinly thir, ittakthea me to pertbe ftnything. luttcr ith a common thubthadtive, neater ander, agreeth with hot roils and if got* mcd by thugar?molftthed being anderlood." A reporter on a Western paper thus rap. )dise? over a lecture recently aenrerea id in town: " Without a written word, for lore than an hour, he piled op gems and old, truth and beauty, in radiant tiers.? Ve thought of it at times as a majestic crytil, brilliant in its noble bulk, and radiating rom innumerable lines, facts, philosophy, oetry, ethics, and religion. Seldom does so ood a mass of truth so richly phrased and o luminously uttered, souie within the each of ?ny sudihuco."