~ ^ iiibi
I A REFLEX OF P O t* U L ARE VENTS.
Ptwtri, 1 ftn>9?M, % ttiflh's ?t % Soirttj. ant. Ii)f 0il?,8?n of lTscf.,1 UnoroUbnt amom nil g[?6^ ?
VOLUME IV. GREENVILLE. SOUTH CAROLINA. THURSDAY MORNING. OCTOBER 15. 1857. ?V
j ' , _ NUMBER 23.
j)e Inutlieni (Enterprise
13 ISSUED EVERY THURSDAY MORNINO,
1 BY PRICE & MoJUNKIN.
WILLIAM P. PRICE,
. EDITOR AND PROPRIETOR.
C. M. M'JUNKIN,
PRINTER.
TERMI.
Ox* Dollar and Firrr CasTe in advance; Two
Dollars.if delayed.
CLUBS of FIVE and upwards, Ox* Dollar,
the money in every instance to accompany the
order.
ADVERTISEMENTS inserted conspicuously at
the rates of 1A cents ncr snuare of 18 lines for
tlie first insertion, ana 37} cents for each subsequent'
insertion.
Contracts for yearly advertising made reason
able.
AOEirrs.
W. W. Walkbh, Jr., Columbia, S. C.
1'rrsB Straplby, Esq., Flat Roek, N. C.
A. M. PanB-x, Fairview P. O., Greenville Pist
William C. Hailkv, Pleasant Grove, Greenville.
C.vrr. It. Q. Andsbaoh, Enores, Spartanburg.
Faith.
BY ALF. BURKETT.
I watched beside a dying child,
And mourners stood around.
While others wept, he only smiled,
And prayed to be unboond :
Prayed that bis spirit might go fiee,
And soar to realms afar?
Immortal realms of purity,
Beyond the shiuing star I
I stood beside ft maiden fair,
When on her dying bed?
And saw the tears of dark despair
By friends, and loved ones, sited:
But smiles alone lit up her eyo,
As when she baue farewell;
And peacefully?resignedly?
In death's cold arms, she fell.
I stood beside a dying man,
In agony and pain?
II is cheeks was thin, pale and wan?
And fever recked his brain 1
Yet ever and anon, he prayed,
And with his latest breath,
Did tell of woundrous love, essayed ;
Of love, unquenched in death.
I gazed on one whose locks wcie gray,
Whose form was bent with years,
Who'd jonrney'd down life's weary way.
Amid its smiles and tears ;
1 saw him tottering toward the grave,
With calm and peaceful bieast;
In faith the old man's heart was brave,
With faith his heart was blest 1
Oh 1 blessed hope, to mortals given,
Which, on the bed of death,
Can point the parting soul to heaven,
With life's Inst fleeting breath 1
Thrice blessed Faith, how pure, how free?
? Its fountain, how divine?
It springeth never ceasingly?
Oh ! be it, Father, mine !
. jHisttllanraua Urabitig.
Recompense of & Duelist
A Leipsio paper just received mentions
the following incident as having occurred in
New Orleans:
44 A Frenchman, lately arrived, went into
a restaurant and called for a glass of beer.
As the boy brought It, a tall man, unknown
to biin, who had eyed the Frenchman rather
insolently on his entrance, snatched the
glass from tho table and drank it off.
4 I have not the honor of your acquaintance,
sir,' remarked the Frenchman, surprised
at tlie familiarity.
' Nor I of yours,' retorted the other.
' You are seeking a quarrel with me,
then T
41 should be sorry to leave you in doubt
of the fact,' was the.insolent response.
4 Look here, sir,' said the new comer, 41
am It man of peaco, and mind my own bus!
ness. I meddle with none, and I receive no
unprovoked insults. I pass yours by for
this time, Boy, bring me another glass !'
The Creole broke into taunting laughter,
and when the second glass was brought.
up uu seiua it, uranK part 01 m?
cooitsn, s ??"? ?.;cn tl.e rcm't'i'lf n?w !
A The Frenchman would have rushed upon
him. hut whh held back by the bystanders
11 ?hl. nir!' they cried. 4 or you are lost! |
It hfc.dftiifc not kill you on the spot, be will |
iu the <tyel, for bo is tlie ino*t skillful duelist
jo Louisiana. With pistol, or . rifle, or
with the a word, bo is imerpiaiied. 'He has
killed thirty-four meu, and wounded ovor
ei*ty more/
1 What you tell me,' replied (bo Frenchloan,
*convinces mo the ttttfrn that be ought
to be dealt with/ '-"TV*** .**
tic,thon drew near the tnad who had in
strl^d himtjurd said : ' Sir, 1 happen to lie
io * particularly good humor to day, and
m? n<* dispareri take offence. Wh havitafcen
Away twe glasses of beer I had ordered
pk And I hope my . for
*&*** m B ' * H
-
%
bearance may teach ydu better behavior.? I
Boy, another glass 1'
The boy brought it, trembling, as if nn- I
ticipating a catastrophe. Scarcely had he
placed it on the table, when the bully again i
seized it, and tossed off its contents. At the <
same instant, like a tiger on his prey, the i
Frenchman threw himself on his enemy ; <
and assailed him in the face, breast, and i
side, with a tempest of blows and kicks.? I
The bully, who had not time to recover him- /l
self, was soon stretched on the tloor, and i
pommeled still more unmercifully, till bleed- i
ing and quite insensible. The victor then I
quietly drew forth his pocket-book, took out
a card, and pinned it on the vest of his pros >
trate foe. He then said to the spectators of I
the affray : i
4 If thero is present any friend of this in- i
dividual, I would inform him that ho may
find mo at my lodgings every morning from
eight to eleven. Boy, another glass of I
beer !'
This time he took the glass, and drank it
off composedly. Then, paying for tho four
glasses, he tuined and left the place, amid
the wonder of all the conronnv.
As they lifted tlie vanquished bully, it (
was found thnt his two ribs were broken, <
and one of his eyes wj\s seriously damaged.
The card bore the inscription : 1 Lvcian Pk- i
tit, Fencing Master, from Paris?will give
instruction in fencing, boxing, and the van- ,
ous methods of fighting. Terms mrrderate.'
Some six weeks after this scene the door
of Mr. Petit'* apartment was flung open,
one morning, and a man strode in without
announcement.
1 I>o you know me?' he cried, in a voice
choked with rage.
Perfectly,' responded the fencing master
?' what is your wish ?'
To kill you,' thundered the bully, who
had just recovered froirt his wounds of
which, however, ho here the traces. * I
know I was first in the quarrel; on that ac
count I give you the choice of weapons.?
But ma^s haste, for you or I must be n
corpse before sunset.'
4 Let us rather talk tlie matter over coolly,'
replied the Frenchman. 11 have no more
d?-siro to-day to kill you, than to beat you the
other day. But if you are bent on picking
u quarrel, you will find mo ready.'
Wretched boaster, we shall see 1 T have
killed thirty four men already in duels, and
you are much mistaken if you think to
make mo afraid of you !'
There was no help, and the combatants
nr? e 'tided in fiirlif mil T??il?
--O"- ?v>?
deferring to tlio bully, who chose the sword,
in the use of which he was very expert.?
ile received a wound in the arm, and the
fencing master proposed an adjustment;
hut the Creole insisted that the encounter
should be fatal to one or the other. It was
not long before he fell mortally wounded.
The community was delivered from a nuisance,
and Petit's fame so widely established
as a proicssor of the science of battle, that
pupils came to hitn from every quarter."
Cowardly Swearing.
There ore bold blasphemers all round us.
We bear their oaths and imprecations as we
walk the streets and drive along the highway.
Even little children swear like pirates.
Sometimes the very air seems close,
hot rind stifling as if filled with exhalations
from the pit, and we tremble lest God should
send sudfeui and awful judgment upon those
who so recklessly take his name in vain.?
Profanity is so foolish as well as wicked,
that it has well been said, u The swearer
needs no bait?the devil gets him to bite
the naked hook." Some vices we can al
most excuse, because of the strength of the
temptation by which the perpetrator U asnailed,
but tlie profane man has no excuse.
Ilia vile habit gratifies not an appetite or
lust. It is practiced from pure love of evil,
it shown a dark and malignant hatred of
God, and has only ono redeeming feature,
viz : its boldness. The open blasphemer dofies
Jehovah to his face. lie dares the omnipotent
One to damn him.
But there is a kind of swearing that is
just as wicked as this, and n great deal meaner.
It is that of those who use the current
Lilliputian oaths. Who, not bold enough
to aay " damn," soften it to "darn " and
seem to think that God will give them great
credit tor their politeness. We cannot pollute
our columns with a list of these common
expressions which are employed by
those who are wicked enough but too cowardly
to swear " right out." Nor is it necessary.
for our readers are peculiarly fortunate
in their neighbors if they are not bee ring
thein every day. What we wish to call at
tention to is this?that nil these little oaths
are onlv the orn??t mim "I-?-?J
. --- a ?? v "'""B0" ?
they moan the same tiling ? tJi?y are just
as profane and blasphemous, and the only
difference is that whilo Satan has made
those for bold sinners be has made these for
timid and cowardly ones.
We have been told that soino professors
of religion are in the habit of using these
sugar coated poisons, these blasphemies and
imprecations with the rough edges trimmed
off. if so, they have, probably, never considered
the true nature of such expressions.
We hope that they will not be guilty any
longer of conduct so cowardly ana disgraoe
ful; but eithpr begin to swear outright, to
' A.f'Jt'l''- * * \ i*
9
that everybody can eee lo whose paity they
belong, and die cluirch enn excommunicate
lliem, or quii swearing altogether.
A man who is telling the truth, and is not
in a passion about it, has no temptation to
?wear. Unless ho Iias formed a habit of
using profane language, he will never think
af it. A plnin and straight forward state
ment will satisfy him, however important
the matter, or how great his interest in it.?
lint as the Christian has no right even to tell
? lie, or to get into a passion, he has no
more business to swenr, even in the Lilliputian
and cowardly way, than an angel has.
And if any of our readers have fallen into
ihe habit, we ask them to sit down and
think how their pietty profani ics would
sound in heaven, and what the angels would
think Of them, if uttered in their presence.
Wo ought not to indulge in any habit that
wo know would be out of place in our future
home, for this life is given to us a time
of preparation for the lifo to come.
[(.. o. Herald.
A Man of Destiny.
A correspondent of the Richmond Whig
communicates llie following concerning one
of the rescued from the Central America :
' Mr. John 1). Dement, of Oregon City,
0. T., one of the saved from the Central
America, whose name has undergone a dozen
telegraphic transportations, has experienced
a most eventful life for one so young.
Residing in the neighborhood of Washington
city, where he vaa born, ho volunteered
in the Rifle Regiment, composed principally
of the best blood of that region, as shown
by the service tendered dining the Mexican
war. lie fought in every battle from Vera
Crnz to the gates of the city and never re
ceived a scratch. Dining the occupation of
that capilol, he occupied a prominent position
in the police depaitment, and escaped
many well laid plots against his life, on the
part of the Greaser population. He was
(ho first tnnu to volunteer on the call of
General Scott for a certain number who
should blow up the .atstlo of Chepultepec at
lite certain sacrifice of their lives.
For his gallantry he wns promoted to a
Lieutenancy in the regular army, 1st Aitillery?a
double honor. His first order was
to the p<?t of Steilacoom on I'ogotV Sound,
a waste howling wilderness, where his adventures
with the Indians orri?.*lva nn.l ntli.
? O r"l ""
er varmints, would form a most interesting
book. On one occasion lie took a small
sailing boat, of the size of an oyster pung,
and with only four men, rescued from a
most savage tribe of Indians, occupying an
island, several persons, including a lady and
child, who had been wrecker! and bnrbarionsly
treated. Persons familiar with the
adventure pronounce it one of the most heroic
and daring, requiring an amount of diplomacy
rarely found?one which Napoleon
might lmvo delighted to honor with the
grand cross in the presence of the grand
army.
Finding the soldier's life in time of ]>ence
too monotonous, or obeying an irresistible
impulse to active life, lie resigned his position,
while stationed at the pleasant post of
Charleston, took to himself a wife and returned
to Oregon to join his brother in bus
iness, who, it inay be said by the way, had
crossed the Itocky Mountains with the first
train that ever went to Oiegon for the purpose
of settlement.
Now comes the remarkable feature of his
travels on the sea. Last vear in enminor in
- ?
for goods bo was in the steamer Illinois,
which was so near being lost, and arrived
in Norfolk undor such painful circumstances.
This year ho meets the ill-fated Central
America and ho gets into Norfolk again.
I'ity it is that we are not in possession of
his account of the catastrophe. While his
case may not have differed essentially from
others, we arc sure he knows as much as
any who made statements, and that as in all
the rest of his works, his modesty would be
equal to his merit."
The Mother of Lord Byron.
Lord 1 lyroii was afflicted will) a club-foot,
and w .cn young ho submitted to some very
painful operations to have the deformity removed.
but with no success. IIis mother
was a proud, passionate and wicked woman,
and evon the yearnings of natural affection
seemed stifled. There is no good proof that
her son naturnlly had a worse disposition
than other children, but there was in htm a
great power for good or evil, wailing only
to ue quickened into lire. Let us see the influence
his mother exerted on hie brilliant
and powerful mind. ?
The reiulera of Byron's life must have
shuddered to hear liirn speak of his mother.
Moore, the biographer of Byron, speaks three
limes of this fact, and tire passages are so
remarkable that 1 will transcribe them literally.
The first is brief but significant.
u On the subject of his deformed foot,
Byron described the feeling of horror and
humiliation that came over him when his
mother, in one of her fits of passion, called
him a ' lame brat Jfoors's Byron, vol. i
p. 21.
The second passage is scarcely less significant:
u But in the esse of Lord Byron, disap
point mont met him at the rery tbieshold oi
life. }JU mother, to whom his affectioi p
first naturally and with order turned, either
rc|H>lled them rudely, or cnnrieiously trilled
with tkem. In speaking of his eaily days
to a friend at Genoa, a short time bcfrre his
departure for Oteece, he traced his first
feelings of pain and humiliation to the cold
ness with which his mother had received his
caresses in infancy, and the frequent taunts
on his personal deformity, with which she
wounded him."
This passage, found on the 146th page, is
only excelled in drcudfulnesa by the following
on the 198th page :
" lie had spoken of his mother to Lord
Sligo, and with a feeling that seemed little
short of aversion. ' Sometime or other,'
(tftitl lU'rnit 4 T in*11 #y*11 ? !% T
?. ~ J wu, 1 Kin (Cll M'U WIIJ A llllin ItTI
towards her.' A few days after, when they
wero bathing together in the Gulf of Lepanto,
he refcried to his promise, and pointing
to his naked leg exclaimed,4 Look here !' it
ia to her false delicacy at my birth I owe
that deformity ; and yet as long as I can remember,
Rho has never ceased to taunt and
reproach me with it. Even a few days before
wo parted for the last time, on my
leaving England, she, in one of her tits of
passion, uttered an imprecation on me, praying
that I might proro as ill formed in mind
as I am in body I Ilia look and manner in
relating the frightful circumstance, can only
bo conceived by those who have seen him in
a similar state of excitement."
What an imprecation from the lips of a
woman, and that woman a mother!?
44 Praying that I might prove as ill shapen
in iuiud as I am in body 1"
The True Wife.
The death of a true wife is beautifully
drawn in the annexed portrait bv Clianning.
Her reserve and shrinking delicacy threw
a veil over her beautiful character. She
was little known beyond her home; but
there she silently sprevd around Iter that
Soft, pure light, the preciousness of which is
never fully understood till it is quenched.?
Her calm, gentle wisdom, her sweet humility,
her sympathy, which, though tender,
was too serene to distmb her clear prcception,
lilted her to act instinctively, and without
the consciousness of either party, on his
more sanguine, ardent mind. She was trnlv
a spirit of-creed. ditluMoi? a trammilizinir in
Huence loo mildly to be thought ot', and therefore
more Mire. The blow which took her
from him left a wound which time could not
heal. Had his strength been continued, so
that lie could have gone from the house of
mourning to the haunts of poverty, he
would have escaped for a good part of the
day, the sense of his bereavement. Hut a
few minute's walk in the street now sent
him wearied home. There the hoveling
eye which hud so long brightened at his entrance
was to shed its mild beam on him no
more. There the voice that had daily inquired
into his labors, and like another con
science had whispered a sweet approval, was
still. There the smypathy which had pressed
with tender hand his aching head, and
hv its nursing care had postponed the hour
of exhaustion and disease, had gone. He
was not indeed left a!on? *, for filial love and
reverence spared no soothing offices; but
these, though felt and spoken of as most
precious, could not take the place of what
had been removed. This great loss produced
no hurst of grief. It was still, deep sorrow,
the feeling of a mighty void, the last
burden which the spirit can cast off. His
attachment to life from this moment scusi
bly declined. In seasons of peculiar sensibility
he wished to he gone. He ker>t near I
Iiitn the likeness of his departed friend, and
spoke to me more than once of the solace
which he had found in it. lie heaid her
1 voice from another woild, and hid anticipations
of that world, always very strong, became
now more vivid and touching.
Stkrkotvi'es in Prayer.?Some men
who are always at " opening the windows
of heaven," " raining a rnin of mercy,"
" laying down the weapons of rebellion,"
" stony heart," " unclean hands," " blind
eyes," "deaf ears," at length transfer the
thoughts to the outward symbol, and quite
hide the inward and spiritual state. Some
men never say humble, or humility, except
by such expressions as " on the bended knee
of the soul, and 44 going down into tho valley
of humiliation. Many men have np
parently forgotten the name of Christ.?
They always use the word 44 Cross " instead.
They pray to be reconciled to tbe Cross,
tliev exhort men to come to tho Croa?, to
look at the Oose, to lay down their sins at
the loot of the Uross. Wo heard an ordination
sermon of great ability, upon salvation
by Christ, in which that name was not onc?
mentioned, the Cross becoming the synonym.
Had a heathen stranger been prca
ent, he would have supposed the name of
the God whom we worshipped, to be
" Cross." This is the most unfortunate because
it not only sinks the power of a living
personality, but presents in its stead a symbol,
which, however precious and historically
affecting, may, by too great familiarity,
lose entirely the 8atriour, And leave only the
Wood, a relic worse than any which Ho
manwh siipersi.itution has presented,
(Wete York Independent.
f I PatKTKita become dead matter at the age
i1 of thirty-eight.
Tub Cunniko Thrush.?There Is much
more intellect in birds than people suppose.
An instance of that occurred the other day
at a slate quarry belonging to a friend from
whom we have the narrative. A thrush,
not aware of the expansive properties of gunpowder,
thought proper to build her nest on
a ridg? of the quarry, in the very centre of
which they were constantly blasting the
rock. At first she was very much discomposed
by the fragments flying in all directions,
but still she would not quit her chosen
locality. Slio observed that a bell rang
whenever a train was about to bo fired, and
that at the notice the workmen retired to
safe positions. In a few days, when she
heard the bell, she quitted her exposed situ
ntiun and dew down to where the workmen
sheltered themselves, dropping close to their
feet. There she would remain until the explosion
had taken place, and theu return to
her nest. The workmen observed this, narrated
it to their employers, and it was told
to visitors who came to view the quarry.
The visitors naturally expressed a wish to
witness so curious a specimen of intellect,
but as the rock could not always he blasted
when visitors came, the bell was rang instead,
and for a few times answered the
same purpose. The thrush flew down close
to where they stood, but she perceived the
clmnge, and it interfered with the process
of incubation ; the consequence was that afterwards
when the bell was rung, she would
peep over the ledge to ascertain if the work 1
men did retreat, and if they did not she
would remain where she was.
[London Literary Journal.
An Tnkidkl HsnuKKD with his own Ahgumknt.?Carrington
was a famous infidel
speaker in the West, who was the terror of
many of the preachers, unable as they were
to meet, at a moment's notice, the cavils
with which he often interrupted them In the
midst of their discourses, lie met with his
match, however, in the liev. Mr. Quickly,
who had a dash of ctagBttiRity with his native
good sense, makingtiiui a popular, as
well as instructive preacher. lie was speaking
of the nature and destiny of the immortal
soul, when the infidel rose in the ctowded
house, and said he knew 44 the Hebrew
hjiu ino ureok, ami the word thai is translated
soul in the Hi bio, might just as well
be rendered wind, or smell, or smelling-bottle,
or anything of that sort; and it was all
nonsense to talk about people having a soul
in them to livo forever.
" Well, well," 6aid Mr. Quielcly, let us try
how it will read, here is my text :
" What shall it prcfit a nian to gain the
whole world and lose his smelling bottle?"
The people took the illustration, and a
laugh of detision sent the scoffer away
abashed at his own impertinence and defeat.
Questions for a Wife.?Do you recollect
what your feelings were immediately
after you had spoken the first unkind word
to your husband ? Did you not feel ashamed
and grieved, and yet too proud to admit
it? That was, is, and ever will be, your
evil genius 1 It is the temptor which la
bors incessantly to destroy your peace, which
cheats you with an evil delusion that your
linsband deserved your anger, when he really
most required your love. It is the cancer
which feeds on those unspeakable emotions
you felt on the first pressure of bis
hand and lip. Never forget the manner in
which the duties of that calling can alone
be fulfilled. If your husband is hasty, your
example 01 pauence win elude as well as
teach hi til. Your violence may alienate his
heart, and your neglect impel him to desperation.
Your soothing will redeem him?
your softness subdue him?and the goodnatured
twinkle of those eyes, now tilling
beautifully with priceless tears, will make
him all your own.
A Yowo Ladv Ovkrboard.? As the
passengers were getting off the ltelle, at the
Central Warehouse wharf-boat, on Monday
night, a young lady, in stepping from the
Belle to the wharf-boat, made too short a
step, and dropped between the two boats
into the river. Her protecter, who, we believe,
was travelling with ber, and who was
assisting her from one boat to the other,
gallantly?stood still, and looked down at
her. One of the deck hands, who heard
life splashing in the water, and the young
lady screaming for help, cried out, " git out
of my way," and "carouse" he went into
the water and roscued the lady. As soon as
she was placed out of danger on the boat,
her "attendant" rushed to her, Aiid clasping
her in his embrace, exclaimed, "O! my dear,
you bad liked to have l>een drowned." He
was so much rejoiced that he left, the darkev
says, "without ffinin' me a dime, or even
tonkin me for jumping in de river arler bis
gal.**?Sclma (Ala.) Reporter.
liini.k Bonks.?An old man once said,
u For a long period I puzzled myself about
ihe difficulties of the Scripture, till at last 1
came to the resolution that rending the Bible
wan like ?</??'/ fi*h. When I find a
difficulty I lay it aside and tall it a bone.
Why nhould I choke on the bone when
there in no much nutritious meat lor met
Some day, j?erhnps, I may find that evon
tie bone may afford me nourishment."
U8KrULToKoCRRKRBPRRR.--Kxoeriir.eOtS
have established the fact, tliRt the plant
known to botanists as potof/onum pwhttalum,
usually known as water-jiepper or
smart-weed, which may be found ifit abundance
along ditches, roads, and barn yards,
is an effectual and certain destroyer of the
bed-bug. A strong decoction i* madei.pf
the herb, and the places infested with the
insect well washed with it. The plant may
also, with much advantage, be stuffed in (lie
cracks and corners o? the room. Elderberry
leaves, laid upon the shelves of a safe or
cupboard, will also drive away ants and
roaches.
Behind the Times.?A North Carolina
paper says: ' v
"There are a great manv neonlc who live
in ignorance for the want of a newspaper.
Last winter, while travelling between this
place and Raleigh, we met a man who conversed
intelligently al>out farming, bat who
had not beard of the death of .John C. CSt*
houn or General Jaclcson 1 lie expressed
great regret at their departure, ana cotild
not imagine what the couutry would uo
without them. He was told that General
Pierce had kept kept things pretty straight,
when he actually asked * Who is General
Pierce!" - '
IIow Fast they Dikd.?The eminent Dr.
I llaudens, in an able report on his official
mission to the Crimea, affirms that, for sometime,
two hundred French soldiers expired
daily between that region and Constantinople,
and that the official bulletins convey no
adequate idea of the sufferings and prtva- ,
lions of the troops, and the extent and horrors
of the mortality. 44 If we consult," he
says, 44 the medical statistics of the hospital
establishment, the number of deaths recorded
in the hospitals was about sixty-three
thousand ; thirty-one thousand in the Crimea,
and thirty-two thousand at Constantinople."
Was another campaign possible !
44 Old Put."?On one occasion during the
Revolution, 44 old Put " had received a lot of
new recruits, and as he had some fighting
which be wished to do before long, and
wanted none but willing meD, be drew up
his levies in rank before him.
44 Now, boys," said he, 441 don't wish to
retain any of you who wishes to leave;
therefore if any of you is dissatisfied and
?? ? ?
nl<7uus w iciuru uume, no may signify
ihe same by stepping six paces in front of
the line, liut,' added the old war dog, * I'll
shoot the first man that steps out.'''
Centre Shot.?At the table of one of
our New York hotels, lately, a rough spun
individual was annoyed by the voracity of
his nearest neigh l>or, who monopolized all
the good things he could reach. After witnessing
his operations for some time, the
blunt customer tapped the gorinondizer on
the shoulder, and said :
" Look-a-here, old fellow, I wouldu't advise
you to go to Ohio right away."
"Why not?"
" Because ther've got the hog cholery out
there!" ^ ^ ^
Free Passes.?A fireman on the New
York Central Railroad asked the supcrinteudant
for a pass, which he declined to
give, saying, "The Company employ you
and pay you so much for your services, and
there our trade ends. If you were at work
for a faimor for a dollar a day, and wanted
to go to Saratoga, would yon expect him to
hitch up his team and take you there for
nothing ?" 44 No, sir; but if he had
I team hitched up, and was going directly to
| Saratoga, 1 should think he was a b?>g if he
did not let me t Ide."
Ricii Editors.?An exchange says that
editors are, a9 a general thing, not overstocked
with worldly goods. Humbug T
says the Ileuron (Wis.) Argus. Here we
are, editor of a country pa]>er, fairly rolling
in wealth. We have a good office, a couple
of barrellod rifles, seven suites of clothes*,
three kittens, Newfoundland pup, two gold
watches, thirteen day and two night shirts,
carpets on our floor, a pretty wife, own one
corner lot, have ninety-three cents in cash,
are out of debt, and have no rich relatives.
A Smart Woman.? A Hartford paper
tells a story of a woman finding a man
hanging by bis neck to a beam in her house.
She cut the rope, threw him down stairs,
held bis head into a pail of water until life
was restored, and then larrupped hitn soundly
with a strap. Afterwards be went into
her room and began to show fight, when
she attacked him with a rolling pin, drove
him iuto the next room and locked l?im in
A you so man in a Urge company, dea?
canting very flippantly on a subject his
knowledge of wbich was very superficial,
the Duchesa of Devonshire asked his name.
* Tis Scarlet,'* replied a gentleman who was
standing Vy. * That may be," said her
i Grace,14 and yet he is not deep read."
I A merry doctor said, the other day, that ?
I jeople who were prompt in their payments
II always i ?covered from sickness, as they were
,] Lood customers, and physicians could not
I j fford to lose them.