The Charleston daily news. (Charleston, S.C.) 1865-1873, November 23, 1865, Image 2
CHURLESTOIN DAILY XEWS....I>YWEMBER 23, lobo._
DAILY ISTEWS^
THURSDAY HORSING, KOVSSlBEBfL^JL
-?--'^z^~-- - ? - -^aiowiug pleasant
ID one of onrexchai^ci-: we ua.ii'j^ ^3nfr..,C(1 his
Dit of humor. Jons 0. S***^ ro0l!.c'ai-irr.o, pleasant,
Bhareinthis woriAof b.^i)u?i aot dcc<mtly
genial, witty, and jg?? ,.crvCB him ^t. Why would
expect to tc "let,- Bnt wRh nB IKH)r ?^,1? it ie other
he be so ^ covM sc0 great attraction brought
Ts?; to our door: yet they Hill come; nor go as they
lime.* But wrfcot ?ip.
THE BOBE OF THE SANCTUM.
BY JOHN G. SAXE.
Again I hear that creaking step !
He's rappiug at the dcor !
Too well I know the boding sound
That ushers in a bore.
1 do not tremble when I meet
The stoutest nf my foes.
But Heaven defend mo from the friend
Who comes but never goes.
He drops into my easy-chair,
And asks about the news;
He peers into my manuscript,
And gives his candid views;
He tells mo where he likeB the line.
And where he's forced to grieve;
He takes the strangest Uberties
But never tokes bis leave!
He reads my daily paper through
Before I've seen a word;
He scans the lyric (that I wrote),
And ftjnta it quite absurd;
He calmly smokes my last cigar.
And coolly asks for more;
He opens everything he Bees
Except the entry-door.
He talks about his fragile health,
And tells me of the pains
He suffers from a score of ills,
Of which b* ne'er complains;
And how he struggled once with death
To keep the fiend at bay ;
On themes like those away he goes
But never goes away !
He tells mc of the carping words
Some shallow critic wrote.
And evacy precious paragraph
Famiflarly can quote.
He thinks the writor did me wrong,
He'd like to run him through !
He says a thousand pleasant thing?
But never says -'AUIEC : "
Whene'er he comes-that dreadful man
XHSaTOJM it SB I may,
I know that, like an Autumn rain,
He'll last throughout the day.
In vain I speak of urgent tasks,
In vain I scowl and pout;
A frown is no extinguisher- .
It docs not put lum out !
- I mean to take the knocker off;
Put crape upon the door;
Or hint to John that I am gone
To stay a month or more.
I do not tremble when I meet
The stoutest of my foes;
Bnt Heaven defend me from the friend
Who never, never goes !
The Fenian Faud.
[ FVc?m Punch.] ?
It is not often thnt we reproduce; a mere article
of nowa, without comment of our own Imu-?**?>-?*1
it the duty of every E^Helr JtmrnaliSt to give as
uroch publicity as possible to thc strange and dis
Eaccl'ul facts revealed in the following list of
nericon contributions to tlie Fenian fund. Thc
list wae found among the papers npon thc person
of ono of tho Americans who were arrested in thu
Australian on tho 14th inst., and ha? been pub?
lished among the evidence taten at tho Castle.
Onlv tho gravest considerations would induce UH
to depart from the ordinary custom of this journal
in regard to news, but in tho presence of the im?
pending crisis tho case is exceptional.
Contributions received, or promised, in New
York, Washington, and Boston, to thc Fund in ajtl
of the Irish Patriotic Fenians:
Amount already credited.?B,9!rT.20O
The Hon. Charlea Sumner. 1,000
William Cullen Bryant. 1.0*10
The Hon. Henry raymond, 55. Y. Times. 1,000
Miss Anna E Dlckimion. r.o.j
The Hon. Horace Greeley, Tribune. OOO
Mr. Erastus Brooks, Express. -WI
James Gordon Bennett. 3.000
Mr. Prime, Joure.-.! cf c numerce. MU
The Rev. H. W. Beecher. 1.000
Lester Wallack._ r>0
. General Couch. . 1.00-)
Genera) Grant.?. * 3.Q0?
Mear?an McMuhteL Philadelphir- ?~" ~ *
.TudR. Ludlow...' ^_i-'*'
s?'yar^tss*? ?a?WRj. U
?rho Vf~ 'oem. Wo!l~s. . 50<i
gfcUcw. ... *
Sr; ' . vcr?... r..;
Mr. and Mr.. Barmy Wilhams. ldc
Pachelcrf nt "\stor House Hot*1..
Thc Wahi .? Rt Delmonico'". .;;
'?Fanny 1 . rn," pei N. P. Willie, Esq.
?ltrr Maretwik. 2.
K.--r?. H.-.r- r.3,Ois'
?. A lon ..; the Bowery. 2S
lix .-Adauric Month?y. 5(1
Washington Thumb, Es-j.. father ci Gen. T. .
Thumb..?.
Artemus Ward. f<l. 20
The Hon. Benjamin Wocd. Daily Nov-. 100
Fireman of the Plng-ugly Brigade. gil
The Bishop of Alabama. Sd
Edwin Forrest. ?C
The Davenport -Brothers, i;cr l>. L. Boord*
caclt. Esq.".. IC',000
Bayard Taylor, Esq. Hal
General Lee. 30
The Original Chrisp Mlcvir- !?. IBU
President Johnson's laundries. 2'!
Phineas Barnum, promised. l.WKJ
The Rev. Brigham Young. HW
A lew of his Wire*. 207
Anglodcicstator. 1
(American papers please copy.)
Brazil.
Advices from thc seat of war in South America
extend to September 24.
Operations had been commenced in thc province
of Corrientes, which, according to thc statements
of General Estigarnbia, tlie defender of Uruguay
ana, was occupied by seventeen thousand Para?
guayans, under Robles. General Flores had re?
crossed thc TJrr.guay with the advance of his arrnv.
reinforced by ?x thousand infantry from Bio
Grande, and was marching northward in order to
cut off the retreat of tlie Paraguayan column,
This movement was supported. Cy tho Brazilian
and Argentine forces, under Mitre, who had as
fcumod thc chief command of thc allied ann v. Thc
Nacional of Montevideo states that tho C?u?t d'En
and the Duke de Sa\e continued i:i tito :i?.ld auder
Marshal Osario end Admiral Tamandarc.
Thc Emperor was t-> leave for San Borjj., on tho
Uruguay River, on the ?3t!i of September, accoin
panicd Dy Admiral Tamandare, but was expected
to return to Uruguayern: ia :ii!>" to sc-risr?tso ti;.:
organization of tho" main body . :' Brazilian
troopn under Flores. Generals Mitre and Floret
had received tho grand cross of the "Cruzeiro'
order from Don Pedro in person, li was report?e
that the invaders were removing all tho guns iron
their batteries at Cscvas, Mercedes a::d It'uchuoh
to the city of Comm?tes, whore the Paraguaya!.
General Rcb&s intended io conci utrate hw .:.>?/??? <
including the Sett, which hail boon ordered nj thi
xi vcr to his support.
jChe.eurren der of Urnguayana cancel ?i cat re?
joicing at Rio Janeiro. Thc Unfilial i?::',jp
mitinea at Rincon do Soto.
Mr. Thornton, tho British Envoy
by the Emperor of Britll vu the v.j? of Sept
b?- 'ru? nuerviow took place in ihe encampm
of thc BnurQian troops, thirteen thousand siro*
before Uruguajana. A large tent served r.t i .
imperial audience clumber, His Majesty vs
surrounded by his sons-in-law, the Conni c?l?
?and thc Duke dc Sase, tho h?;:;;-,:? >. of Vi ar Admi
ra! Tamandarc, the Marquis de Cai ia?, and Ute
oilicora of hi? saitc, together with a number o'
Brazilian g?rerais, accompanktl hy their respoc
tire stairs. A battalion of infantry served as a
guard of honor. Mr. Thornton expresser, thc de
fire of thc?ucen and government o? England for
the restoration of diplomatic relations between
the two countries. Tho Emperor .-ej lioi- that he
looked upon tho renewal oi' diplomatic relations
with sincere satisfaction.
--oro
IT appcaro from the United Slate* Treasurer'a
monthly ntatcmcnt for October, that tho amount
on deposit in ccin was 134,73-1,000. and the totai
iii0!? 0Q .dcPOaii nearly om hundred millions.
? it01 v-waa ?-ailabi?!. Tlie amen?t on de
SSm 1U C Uoaal Eank3 raa netr]y thirty mil
r. T. BARNUM ON HUMBUGS. ;
A History of Belosions and Impostare?. ;
C URIUUS A SECDOTES.
CASLETOM baa just pubhskod a VO?URU entitled
'.Tho Humbugs of the WorW; sn Lceoant nf j
Humbugs, Delusions, Impositions, Quackeries, '
Deceits and Deceivers generally, in ai: a^c?, by j
T. T. BAUKVM." ?
Mr. BAIWCUH begins his account of "The Hum-1
bugs of tho World" with '-Persona! Kemmis-j
cences," and wc suppose I'-Us the following siory j
in bis preface by way of justification, or At least j
precedent lor tho boo): :
I once travelled through the Southern States j
in company with a magician. Thc finit day in |
each town bo astonished hid auditors with bis tlc- j
ccptione. He then announced that on til? follow
ing day he would show how each trick was per?
formed, and how every man might thus become
hie own magician. That expose spoiled tho leger?
demain market on that particular route for seve?
ral years.
To "kiss and tell" bas always been thought, at
least by those who kies, a piece of treachery ; but
Mr. BABKDM claims that " if we could have a full
exposure of the ' tricks of trade* of all sorts, of
humbugs and deceivers of past times, religious,
political, financial, scientific, quackish, and so
forth, wc might perhaps look for a somewhat
wiser generation to follow us. I shah bc well
satisfied if I can do aomethbig towards so good a
purpose."
After bis "personal reminiscences" bc treats of
"the spiritualists, trades, business, impositions,
money manias, medicine and quacks, hoaxes,
ghost? and witchcrafts, adventurers and religious
humbugs."
I He triee to persuade his readers that there is a
I species of humbug in all art, science, literature
I and business, but winds up with the remark,
which wc shall not dispute, that "thc greatest
humbug of all is thc man "who believes-or pre?
tends to believe-that everything and everybody
mo humbugs." Mr. Barnnni's personal romin is- ;
cenccs arc, of course, tho most interesting part of
thia volume; the public bas an idea that he has
taken it in very often, and it is curious to know
how he did it. Ho, on thc contrary, is of opinion
that the public lins always got its money's worth
from him, as well ns from some others whom bc
tells us about, among whom be counts
OENIX, THE H.'.T?ET..
When thc tickets for .Tenny Lind's first concert
in America were wold at auction, scvotal business
j men, aspiring to notoriety, "bid high" for thc
I tit's: ticket. It was finally knocked down to "Genio,
the hatter,"-for Thc journals in Portland
; (Maint!) and Honiton (Texas), ami all other jour
' nuls throughout thc United States, between th?se
; two cities, which were connected with thc tele
I graph, announced tito fact in their columns tho
: next morning. Probably two millions of readers
I read the aunouiiccuiu?t, and ?.??Kerf, ""Who is
jo.nin, tho battery" (?oiiin became famous in a
i day. liven' man involuntarily examined him hat
j to see if it wns made by (lenin: and an Iowa editor
declared that ono of lu* neighbor? discovered the
name Gcnin in hi* uld hat and immediatelv an?
nounced thc fact to his neighbors in front o*f the
postofficc. It was suggested that thc old hat
should bo sold at auction. It was done then and
there, and tho Gunin hat sold for fourteen dollars !
Gentlemen from city and country rushed to
Gcnin's store to buy their bats, ninny of them
j willing to pay even an extra, dollar, if necessary,
I provided they contd get a glinipso of Geniu him?
self. This singular freak put thousands of dollars
into the pocket of "Genin, the batter," and yet I
never heard it charged that he made poor hat-S-or
that he would bo guilty of "an imposition nuder
fair pretences." On the" contrary, no is a geutle
man of probity, and of thc first n spectabibtv.
When the laying of the Atlanfic Telegraph was
! nearly completed, I was in Liverpool. I offered
I thc company one thousand pounds sterling ($5*000)
I for the privuego of sending th, first tv, nt; wyr !
over tho cable to tay Minium iu N> . Vofkr no!
that there was any intrinsic merit hi tho words,
Ibu'that I fan;;- <"i lhere was nfor< than ?500U
worth of notoriety in thc opernti <:. Hut ur.ecii
! Victoria and "Old BjHi" ".-..<. ? '.. . ! . r vf
Xti . '."? --uSf-r hud Uti: preference, ?nd I v.-j<
; '..o;"..,'2I d to '.take a back -v.u. '
ti *. A FBExen jrexnuo.
. of our readers have beard of arid some
nbtlcss seen Mangiri, tho notorious iead
???'t : "er of Paris. Mr. Barnum knew him,
. nvll ?if him: * .
( ?rn- i pair of bay horse?, attached toan
, willi two peats, tba ba.'k ono ulwavs
i ? opted I vali-t. Sometimes ho would taku
mi ... ' tito Champs Elysees; at .->.{.<..
H ti?, - near rh . ituun iu th? Place Vendome: but
usually b ?... in thc afternoon in tho Place
de la Ba ". Place tlc la Mado?eine. On
' Sunda. - : .vern locality wa? thc Place dc la
! Bonrae. Jla? in w.;.- ii .well-formed, aiatelydook
i'g indivMii moct EoJf-Mttisfied* coon
K tcnancc, which di \TV: "I ara master bore:
and all Un. rnj an baTO to do is, to listen
and obey.*1 Arriving 1:1 destmed stopping
' place, his carriage bahid. His servant handed
1 . him a ease from whic! he took soreral large por
? i traits of himself, w hich he hung prominently upon
j thc sides of his carriage, and also placed iii iront
I of him a vase lilied with medals bearing bis like
; ness on one side and a description ol'his pencils on
? the other. Ho then leisurely commenecif a change
(' of costume. His round hat was displaced by a
; magnificent burnished helmet, mount?!?] with rich
i plumes of various brilliant color--. His overcoat
was hid aside, and ha donned ia it- stead .1 costly
velvet tunic with gold ft inges, ne then drew ?
pair of polished stool gauntlets upon lus hands,
covered-Jus breast with a brilliant cuirass, and
placed a richly-mounted sword at his aide. His
servant watched him closely, and upon receiving a
sign from his master, he too put on Iiis official COM
tame, which consisted of a velvet rob" and ti hol?
me:. Tho servant then strnck np a tune cn the
richly-ttoicd organ which alway? formed a uart of
Mangiu's outfit. The grotesque appearance of
j these, individuals, ami tho music, soon drew to
; gethv r an admiring crowd.
Then the great charlatan stood upon hi? feet,
ll;.- manner was calm, digi?fied, imposing, hnloed
.-..mott solemn, lor his face was ns serious iu that
of toe chill mourner at . un.iraL Hir, sharp Ln
? nlffiJM? ?h. throng wfcfali was
i prcssmg around Ins carnage tau*il *. -, let1 -ti
i *'.\ T-: '- fwm the ga? of thc anxious crm-d.
1 ?MZ fv^n^?-ypwlc?c4thod?>.ire.l c?fcain
, ??r?t*ou?3waitmg lo hear bin ?ma*. *'
. bad .-.irrn-a thu kin?] 0* h* ? '
tkoughUhe andfcnwr "
- hand, ani Im
s, . atrj h??nii
inore : .1 rf
shop in thc Ru-.- Rivoli, but "f could not soil pencils
enough to pay my rent; whereas, by assuming 1
:isguh?e-"it is nothing >siso-I havesitoceedea :
in?r.ttra?ting gen?ra.5 attention, and i:i selling lite- i
rally minions of roy pencils; and I aseoru you i
ll:ere is at titi., moment scarcely au artist in
Fiance or in Great Britain who don't know that I ?
manufacture byftr thc best black lead pencils ever j
And titi - assertion indeed imf. Ilia pencils
were uvorywhere acknowledgi ] w ix- superior to .
anv other. 1
While he was thus addressing his audience, he
would take a blank card, -.r.d with one of his non:
tils would protend to be drawing tho portrait of
some man standing near him; then showing his
picure to rho crowd, it proved ta lie thc- head of a
donkey, wbicli, of cours*, produced abouts ol'
laughter. ,
"There, do yon see what wondcrfnl pencils
these are ? Bid yu ever behold a more striking
likeness':*1
A heartv laugh would bc sure to follow, and
I then he would exclaim: "Kow who will have thc
I first pencil-only five SOUS?"1 One would buv, and
1 then another: a third and fourth would follow:
? and with the delivery of each pencil he would rat
I tie off a string of witticisms which kept his patrons
' in capita] good-humor; and frequently he would
! sell from two hundred to live hundred pencils in
' immediate succession. Then he would drop down
i in bis carriage tor a few minutes and wipe the
perspiration from his face, while his servant play?
ed another overture on thc organ. This gave Iiis
purchasers a chance to withdraw, and afforded a
'-ood opportunity for a fresh audience to congre?
gate. Then would follow a repetition of his prc
1 viotis sal"*, and in this way ho would continue for
hours. To those disposed to have a aowesmV of
the great humbug ho would .sell ?ix pencils, a nie
J dal and a photograph of himself for a franc (twen
i tv cents). Atter taking a rest he would commence
! a' new speech. '
j lie said to Mr. Barnum:
'?'Aha! You never saw better pencil*. Yon
know I could never maintain my reputation if I
sold poor pencils. But, ?acre We?, my m iserable
would-be imitators do not know our grand secret.
Fir.st, attract the public bj din and tinsel, by bril?
liant sky-rockets and Bungo!* lights, then give
them aa much as possible for their money."
Mosi of onr young readers will remember
GRIZZLY ADAMS AXD IIIS 11EAJRS,
! who exhibited in New York some years ago:
and will be intercsfTO in Slr. Barnum's account ot
thc man, part of which we extract:
V.'hcn Adamsand his other wild beasts (for be
was nearly as wild as any of them) arrived in
New York,'ho called immediately at the Museum.
He was dressed in his hunter"? suit of buckskin,
trimmed with the skins and bordered with thc
hanging tails of small Backy Mountain animal-;
his cap consisting of tlie akin of a wolfs head and
shoulders, from which depended several tails aa
natural as life, and under which appeared his
stiff busliy gray hah- and his long white grizzly
! beard. In fact, OM Adams was quite as much of
a show as his bears. They lind come around Caye
! Horn "u Die- 'lipper ship Golden Fleece, and a
se? voyage cf three and a "half months had prol>
ably not added much to the beauty ur. ima* ?p
pe?ranee of Iii? old bear-hunter.
During cur couv?-ri?atioii, Grizzly Adams took ofi
Iiis cap, and slimwd-me the top ut' his head. His
' fkuil was literally broken i?. It bad on varions
occasions been struck by the fearfn) paws of his
I grizzly stadw*???5 Snd thc last Mow from the bear
j callwr**tuonoral Fremont'1 had laid open his brain,
iso that ils workings were plainly visible. I rc
' marked that I thought (hut iras a dangerous
; wopnd, and might probably prove fatal.
"?Ye.-," replica Adam?, "that will lix inc out. It
' had nearly healed: but old Fremont opened it for
; me, for tbs third ot fourth time, before I left Cah
j forma, and be did his business so thoroughly, I'm
; a used-up man. However, I reckon I may live six
j months or it year yet."
; This was spoken as coolly as if he had bec-n talk
; ing about the life of a dog.
Tlie immediate object of "Old Adams*' in calling
i upon me was this : I had purchased one-half in
I forest in his California menagerie from a man who
had come by way of thc Isthmus from California,
j and who claimed to own an equnl interest with
j Adams in the show. Adams declared that thc man
had only advanced him some money, and did not
; possess "thc right to sell half of the concern. How
j ever, tho man held abiil of sale for one-half of thc
j "California Menagerie," and Old Adams finally
; consented to accept me as an equal partner in the
', speculation. Baying that- ho guessed I could do thc
managing part, ?md h? would ahou np rho ani?
mals I outniiiod a canvas tent, and erecting it
un Lliv present site pTWiillaek's Theatre. Adam*
there opened his novel California mi uagcrit*. On
! themorn?nj! fi.w^. .' ..-. ?'-?cered.?!
... ?nuce : .. ol auiui? cages, doini Bruaoway ami
up the Bow?iy: Old Idan;*, dressed in bis banting
. ostnme, heming tho line, with a platform wagon
o:: which wewpLtcMttu^immdnsegrizzlv bears,
two ox which lie bold hy idiaius, while ho was
: mounted on the ba;'k of thc largest grizzly, which
stood in thc centre, and was not secured in any
maimer whatever. This was thc bear known a's
"General Fremont," and docile had ho lieeome
? thal Adams said be had used him as a pack bear
tu carry his codling and bunting apparatus
' through tho mun laius l'.;r .-ix mom!]-. ami bsd
[ridden bim hundreds of ?.railes. Bat apparently
i docile as were mary nf these animals, there was
?not on.-- among thou that would not occasionally
i give even Adam) i sly blow or a ?ly hilo when ii
i good chalice r.ft'eied; henee. OM Adams was bul a
j wreck of bia former noir.
His wife carno Aom Hasaachnsctts to New York
j and nursed him. Dr. Johns dressed his wounds
every day, and not ml? told Adams bo could never
recover, hut assnrcdhis friends that probably a
very tow weeks wouldlay bim in his grave.
I Bnt Adams was ai firm ns adamant and as
! resolute as a lion. inning tho thousands who
saw bim dressed in Es grotesque hunter's suit,
i and witnessed the apparent vigor with which he
i "performed" the g?rige monsters, beating and
I whipping them into apparently tho .most perfect
; docility, probably no' one suspected that thia
: rough, fierce-looking, towcriiil deml-savage, ?is lie
j appeared to be, wau aiffering intense pain .from
ibis broken *kull ?indfevered system, and that
j nothing kept bim from stretching himself on his
! death-bed bnt that m<8t indomitable and cxtraor
! di?an,- will of his.
After the exhibitioi had been open six weeks,
i the doctor insisted (h?t Adams should sell out his
? share in tho animals ami scttlo up nil his worldly
j affairs, for ho assurai him that he wa-* growing
j weaker every day, ard ji.i earthly existence must
? soon terminate.
I "I shall lice a gooddeil longer than yon doctors
think for." replied idams, doggedly; and thon,
I seeming after all to ralizo the truth of the doc
! tors assertion, he turned to me and eaid: "Well,
i Mr. B-, you must bur me out." Ile named his
: price f\"r his half ofihe "show," and I accepted
hU ofter. We had araugcil U> exhibit thc bears
; i:i Conneeticnt and Massachusetts during thc ?um
j mer, in connection will n circus, and Adams in
si-ic-.l that 1 shotlld lire him to travel for the
' summer, and exhibit tie bears in their ciirioiiH
j performances. Ho o?frod to go for sixty si liars
? per week and travcUni expenses .: .:..- !:'...: '
>. ?fe.
; I replied lb? i ? u . ' .11 - - r. . lo:,
?? be wn'M tai li* b;?l .:..'. d Kim : - give .s?'.
1 ?' ?".' ? .' :.. l.r '. : e iu Masvachttsetw;
?. ';. you <.'. . tiii/ I v.:.. ? ...ci and
...' *... - ' .. . . ? n .fecks?'* asked
lf ftdarw. eases -,
'? : . ! "ed dollars" ; replied, witb S laugh.
. .a?!" exclaimed '.!;?..->. "1 nil! do ir: sn
.ir w up w.\ agreement fi; thai effect ni once. Btu
! mind you: draw it payatta to :.:;.' ??'.>, f?.r 1 may be
I too weak lo attend to ! iii ess after tho Icu w.:. bs
1 ire up, and if 1 pcrtormmy : ;.rt -.r thc contract,
I want lier to gst thu ?to ?..-...-W- id i!i,vw without
any troubl \"
l drew np c coutraci b fay v::::i >\:-v dolors'
per woe.,-.for hhi 8orvjcf.*Mja?id if bo emst?no'H! pt
exhibit the bear? for teneonsecutivo ;,? h.- t waa
"?eulo i?;; .1 !..rn or bitwf? live hsm.lr-.-d dobftis 1
extra. ?
,'pT?iiibar*lost your 2i i.usdn-d dollsrar ex?
claimed Adama ou taking-:-, contract; -fer I ssa :
bonna to live and earn it:'
"I hope yon may, irithU] tst Ijeart. a bun-:
ilrcd moro ir you desire ir,' 1 repli StJ.
"Call me a fool if Jd>?'t oani five bctn
arcoi ciclaiiacd AdaaV. Kith a triumphant
langa. '
And he did. I
Remarking upon thc fajs that a ctiebratcd pill- j
maker paid five thecsaud dollars i'.-i advertising |
hie wares, Mr. Buonni rebari? : i
Advertising is to a genuine article 1
manure is to laud-it largely increases tho
duet. Thousands of persona may be reading ;
advertisement while you ar;: eating, or sleet
or attending to your business; hence public al
tion is attracted, new customers com / te yoe.,
if yon render them a satisfactory eipjividenl
their money, they continue to patronize you
recommend you to" their friends.
nSASDBETH'S KLUS-MIX. BABNXTM S EXPEBIXS
Advertising s??ia caused his receipts to bc c
1 mons. Although thc pills were but twenty
I cents per box, they were sold to such a great
I tent that tons of huge coses, rilled with tho "p
i Jy vogetablo pill," were sent from tho now
! extensive manufactory every week. As hts I
I ness increased, so in the samo ratio did he exi
j his advertising. The doctor engaged at one 1
I a literary gentleman to attend, under the su
. vision or himself, solely to thc advertising der
! mont. Column upon column of advertise m
appeared in the newspapers, in thc shape of leat
! and scientific pathological dissertations, thc 1
i reading of which would tempt a poor morts
rush for a box of Brandrethpuls; ?0 evident wi
(according to thc advertisement) that nobody 1
had or ever would have "pure blood" until f
one to a dozen boxes of the pills had been ts
ns "purifiers." Tho ingenuity displayed in 1
coetiug these advertisements was superb, and
probably hardlv equalled by that required to 1
coct the pills.
A fnnny incidont occurred to me ?Q connec
with this great pill. In tho vear 1836, while I
traveling tlirongh tho States" of Alabama. Jib
sippi and Louisiana, I became convinced, by rt
jug Dr. Brandreth's advertisements, that I nee
his pills. Indeed, I there read thc proof I
every system that I experienced, either in im
nation or in reality, rendered their extensive 1
sumption absolutely necessary to preserve
life. I purchased a box of Brandreth's pill?
Columbus, Mississippi. The effect was iniri
loua! Of course, it was just what the advcrl
ment told me it would be. In Tuscaloosa, Ali
purchased half a dozen boxes. They were all t
np before my perambulating ?how reached Vi
burg, Mississippi, and I was a confirmed disc
of the blood theory. There I laid in a dc
boxes. In Natchez I mado a similar "porch
In New Orleans, where I remained several mon
I was a profitable customer, and had become
roughly convinced that thc otdy real "green-bo:
in the world were those who preferred mea
, bread to Brandreth's pills. I took them morn
; uu<m and night. In tuet, thc advertisements
noun ced that ono could not take too many: f
one box was sufficient to purify tho blood, el?
extra boxes would have no injurious effect.
I arrived in New York in June, 1838, and by
time I had become roch a firm believer in tlie
oacy of Brandreth's pills, that I hardly stoj
long enough to speak with my family, heft
hastened to thc "principal office" of Doctor 15
dreth to congratulate him on being thc groa
public benefactor of the age.
I found thc doctor "at home," and introdt
. myself without ceremony. I told him my c
Hences. He was delighted. I next heartily
! dorsed every word stated in Iiis advortiseuie
j Ho was not surprised, for ho knew the ell
! ..f ki? rHH" were such us I described. Still he
? elated in having another witness whose exton
. j experiments with his pills were so eminently si
j factory. The doctor and myself were both ha
! -he in bc ing able to do so much good to maul:
II in being the recipient of suco untold hem
j thrungli his valuable discovery.
I At huit, the doctor chanced"to say that bc v.
. dered how I haptxmcd to get his pills in Natcl
j "for," said ho. "I have no agent {hero as yet."
J "Oh !" I replied, "I always bought my pill
j tho drug stores."
'.Good Heavens!" exclaimed thc doctor,"!
I they were all counterfeits.' vile impositions! ]
j simons compounds ! I never sell a pill to a dr
I gist-I never permit an apothecary to handle 1
of my pills. But they counterfeit them by
bushel; thc unprincipled, heartless, murder
impost?is !"
Mr. BABNTM relates, however, that the p
j proved, after all, to have been genuine.
"SANDS OF LIFE."
! Everybody has seen his advertisement, bc"
j ning "A retired Physician whose sands of 1
have nearly run out," cte. And everybody
j most-knows how kind tho fellow is m sendi
! gratis his recipe. All that is necessary is (as y
; find out when you get thc recipe) to buy at a hi
price from him one iugrodieut which (lie sa;
you cati gel nowhere els*1. This swindling seal
? ts in faa a smart brisk fellow of about thirty-!!
I yeal a of ago, notwithstanding tho length nf th
during which tu usu a funny phrase '?hieb wu
? body got up for him he has bct-n . aUtuctcd wi
. leose tnit-huasd bis incrti.l sand-cart.'' S^i
benevolent friend was so much distressed abu
I tito feebleness of "Oki Saudi of Life" as lose
kira oui-day a large parcel l-y ..xp?v--. mark
"C. 0. I.'.," and costing quitj. a figure. "(J
[ Sands" paid, and opening thc parc-:', lound h.
a bushel of excellent sand.
AV IT.'.MA:; UT USW.
Every visitor tn Fl--renee, during the lust tweu
: years, must have noticed on tho grand piazza L
fore tho Ducal Palace the straugo-geiiitts knot
1 a> Monsignori Creso, ?ir, in plain English, M
? Cr.esns. Ho is sn railed because of hi-- r*put<
great wealth; bnt his real name taChristopho
; Kischin. which i may again translate as Chris:
?bur Bisk. Mrs. Uruwniag refers to him i:i one
! uer poems-thu "Cusa Giddi Windows,*1 I think
ami he has also been the staple of a tole hy .?:?<. -
I thu Trollope brothers.
i Twice every week ho comes into the city in
?strange vehicle, drawn by two lino Lombardy pi
, nies, and unharnesses them in the very centre <.
i thc-square. His assistant, a capital vocalist, In
j rjins Ui sing immediately, and a crowd soon co
. leets around the wagon. The Monsignori' take
i from the box beneath- bis neat a sp?endidly-joiuto
' human fckolcton, which he suspends from a ta
? rod and hook, and also a number of human skulk
i The latter are carefully arranged on an adinstabl
! sheif, and Creso takes his place behind them
I while in his rear a perfect chemist's shop of Hasta
: bottles, and pill-boxes aro disclosed,
i Very soon his singer ceases, and in tho pure?
! Tuscan dialect-the very utterance of which i
'. music- tho Florentine juaek-doctor proceeds t
I address tho assemblage. Not being conversan
[with tho Italian, I am only able to give thc sub
stance of his harangue, and pronounce iudifier
cathy upon thc merit of his elocution. I am as
sured, however, that not only the common people
who aro his chief patrons,"but numbers of tb
most intelligent citizens, are always entertains
by what bc has to say; and certainly his gesture
and style of expression seem to heirn y great ox
colloncc of oratory. Having turned the skolctoi
round and round on its pivot, and minutely ex?
plained &e varions anatomical part?, in order bc
show his proficiency in tho basis of medical .? !
enos, ho next lifts thc skull?, ono . y ?w
cants upon their relative pev''-.-': ...
shrewd anecdote now ann :
tim original owner "i' each . . mi .
11'? wi?- ii-.a Stil il . -' . * fal* ?i??fi
j Silcuna, and yrcw ilpili dts?y in;.^.i..-rr>"r**v?r
dresser?" -?ti 1 o?ve-gath' ?*< s*!*, .'v '? ? ,<.. ? .
; T.' an fm- of ?.M..i::-t ..: : . .... .
r a, cutlet; of. lean mattoi on . ;. ..
. : Titian wir.-?. Y.-'- ? '.-Au. .1? cdacatcd
l*i .. :. ?.-.? *:? .. .. . ' i a ''.erin: ttV the pto
f. .... .?mi studied Airier' closely.
..ic note.ricty that he gained byree'tii
. .-.i-, led Indi, in an evil boar. ? ? veutnro an :tp
; iva rance cn crami rMc ai Floren**?, i\t a third-rat*'
j theatre, Hi* father had meanwhile dvHV?afwd. ami
! lefi bim the pronerty; but. :-> maia th . .>? rc
iferredto, he e?ld almost hi? cutir? inheritance.
As may b? supported, hi* faiiurowa** signal. Ii*>w
' erer ea -v he had found i: to am I*K> tho rough, ita
' tutored 'wafeaiilrj --f !:is neighborhood, tho trsi of
. a larg- and polished ?Hy wns beyond Sus merit,
i s. .-,;.:..r and abashed, bc sank lo t!..? lower
j tralksof drama:!-? art, singing i:i tho -.'horusos at
1 '."-ir ..pora, playing minor paxUinshow-piecw.itml
'? ul] the while -vi-Hi!;: Ut? :<:i:"g of disappointed am
; lution and halr-de-i* rved penury,
j (me day found hon, .?:*? the ho^iiming of v-i:;tor.
witlwH?t work, and wit:; mt rt mAd? in bia pocket.
Parsing a druggist's shop, he M?W a placard asking
for minto ?.dlaecrttin now preparation. The
druggie: adviuie?d him A Hjriu.ll sum for traveling
i ;, penses, ami he took to peripatetic lectures at j
once, treing into tho country and haranguing at ail
tim viiiag.s. i
Ht rc* lie i'i-:::iil Ins dramatic edncation available.
Ti: ugh nut good enough for tn tltor, ha was s!!f
?iciently itlerur for a nomadic, eulogizer ufa patent
meibViue. Ilia vocal abilities were also of service ?
to him i;, gathering the people together. The
great secret of KUCCOSS in au)ihicg is to get a!
hearin.i;. Half the object i.-? ..-.aiBed wh-m th? a.> j
tseneo U tscombled.
By report,'no was nom a magician ano ; yr.:
nan, and a knack that bo had of slight ol ? 1
waa nut thc least influential or'his virtues.
Hi* bodily prowess was as great, as his t
ness. One day, at Resole, a foroign doctm ?
stuned to challenge Monsignors to a dc batt
thc offer was accepted. While the two stood
gether in Christoforo's wagon, and the intruci ? .. ?>
haranguing the people, tho quack, without a un.. .
men i. of his face, or a twitch of' bis body, ] ? ?'?
bi? foot against his rivals log and threw him Lt Lim
ground. He liad the effroi?tery to proclaim tho
feat as magnetic entirely, accomplished without
bodily means, and by virtue ol' ills Mask art ac?
quirements.
An awe fell upon Um iistoners, and they refus a
to hear the checkmated ilisputaut further.
As soon as Cristofero began to thrive ho faduig
ed his dramatic taste by purchasing a superb
wagon, team and equipments, and hired a ser?
vant. Such a turnout* had never been seen?in
Tuscany since the Medici&a days. It gained for
him thc name of Creso straightway, and, enabling
him to travel more rapidly, enlarged his bu:'.:tess
sphero, and so vastly incr?asod his profit.
He arranged regular days and hom's for flach
place in Tuscanv, and soon became as wideij
known as thc Grind Duke himself. When it wa .
known that ho had bought an old castle at Pon
tassicve, on the banks of tho Arno, hie repntativ :
still further increased. He was now so prospero...
that ho set the facultv at defiance. He proclaimcf
that they wore jealous of bis profounder learning,
and threatened to expose the banefulness of their
systems. _ _
A Wandering Journal.
The Memphis Appin!, whose wandering ? and
vicissitudes during the civil war occasioned ao
much amusement, has finally Bottled down at ita
original starting place at Memphis, and apr'-, rs
as a huge ten column folio sheet. The addi-.'-" c-?
the editor is lengthy, florid and eomewhut re?
pentant. It has no "unmanly excuses to ofl'-r fe:
his former sentiments," but admits that
stern logic of events has practically com; .died
their renunciation." It says :
We frankly and truly accept the interpretation
which has been stamped with the rod verd:^. of
war upon tho Constitution, of the indestructibil:'.'
of that Union of States and people which ni?k. S
tts, for all time, one mighty and indivisible it. -
public; wo recognize and abide by the logical
i seqnenco of tho late unhappy civil war, in tb.: in?
struction, now and forever, of tho institution of
African slavery. Tho red mon of the land, tba
true fighting soldiers of both sections, have dc
t creed that there shall be a real peace anti rt
J genuine Union in tho great American family. Be?
tween the veteran Federal soldier, and thc on*
; flinching Confederate soldier, who have so oi't?n
met each other in thc raging conflict of battle,
there is a feeling of respect that affords the sure
i foundation on which thc restored Union will ?es!.
While "Old Joe" Johnston was bothering tba
\ Federal advance, our press made its clean escapo
down thc Southern Badroad to Meridian, and so
' on to Atlanta, at its leisure. It is the same press
which vibrated to the thmider-shock of the eieg-s
, of Atlanta, retiring therefrom a little whilo before
\ Sherman's victorious legions entered that ill-fated
,' city, lt is the same press from whence, at Mont
, gomery, the Appeal continued to cheer and >:u
11 courage those whose quarrel it had espoused, to
I 'quit themselves like men, until the advance of
! that dashing fellow, Mnjor-Goneral Wilson, with
f his nine thousand Spencer rifles, in the banda of
1 picked men, who know how to rido and to ?y b t,
admonished ns of thc policy of evacuating tbe
"cradle of thc rebellion." And so this same vete?
ran campaigner of thc press-corps took to Itself.
; wheels and steam, and sought refuge east of tho
Chattahoochie.
The Appeal gives tho following humorous ac?
count of its peregrinations :
The prose anon which this number of tho Appeal
ts printed, and which will, we trust, yet issue many
thousands to be scattered broadcast throughout
the Mississippi Valley, is tho identical press wh'"i
left here in 1?G2, a littlo while before tho occv; .
tion of Memphis by Federal troops. It is
; same press from which was issued tho Appeal at
I Granada, and which retired from that town as -.
i Federal cavalry were approacliing the north b. *u -.
of the Tallahatchie, after (?rant had driven Ptit
I berton from Abbeyville. It is the same pro?-.
I with the same pressman (Andy Harman, may ha
j days bo long and his shadow never grow less), (mt
i was shelled out of Jackson, when Grant mado ia
? famous move from Brn?nsbnrg, by which he Iso
. lated Pemberton aud shut bim up in Vicksburg,
bj bagged thereafter on the Fourth of July. At
I first v.e shells hal the best of it, a number
: them intercepting the line of march over Pc:
' Hirer; but Andy Harman and the faithful o
! press, .rom which had just been printed the mer
ilia's Appeal, won tbe race in tho end.
I Thc bulk of the office v - IG .imbil ..
I and was there dcatroyed ' S roi . -Gen
; ral Wilson, bnt the pi-ess .. in "ardill
! to Macon, was eared fro: rion s ispor
' In a safe place, and was . .:. . . : ' I af? r
. tho armistice and the of order:
i from General Sherman to stop: diiroction bf
I cither public or privad pr-.'jx rty. It has ba
j many A narrow escape..' ti is I 1 '?oartj
; and aapablo Of doing j?o: . ?*. aa .10 aj
j iv jr ance of our ?iap^r w - Lil .
Tl??: Ai>?>lc Truc- . '.-.r Uigur;.
I .-. KlZAuOX ANO A SALT * PAID TO TJIK
j IV.I'.linP.s Oi ; l rr.
I Til-: Detroit Five Press ? it the -.- nd rfruit
; trade this year has be. r<j : .9 tb
! space ol' sis weeks, and " -ennoi . roigh
; have been almost blocke '. .. ... ,,. . quar
titiescoming forward t . ..;...::.st -.. ware
bouses bare been filled t . .. . . , emnc
I rary sheds have been er. . jfr.r ... 3 tm :
: until it could bc remove. ? , ta tl .... TL
i shipments have been to t every.Stato in tb.
Union. Ohio took near' . th? <-.,>. fr it, in;
i meuse quantities of whi ' ?, . .lopped to Olevi -
?land, Cincinnati, and 1-?::'<-:i ?Ct?iifuckv. Th"
winter fruit has been sh ? : Maine, V- -mon.
New Hampshire, Massae .:<.?.: . :;, tji :t,N? ?
York, New Jersey, Pe: r . .? ?0< K,a fl,
! Southwestern States. I ;t?<13 \?, .-egor
' forward to New Orleans
There aro yet large q . . '. .- :> rome torwiti
which will probably swell tb? \ji-?r:..te nn t"
lino of the Michigan <:-..-..-.1 to 'Wjm barrel
Crossing then to the lin' :'-. ?iebigan Sont
ern Railroad, which s tr: mi: ziko h . >-> iii
! ty. "f White Pigeon a.-: : :!.-.. llywrs, iv* ii
; fr.?-i thexec down, a? . . ?i?t<- ;
during conn try as alon; . M ictiii au fcect:
Taking thc actual fit;::. : . f ti ?ame a an ii:
territory along Hu 1 ?cr .->>. : ?I,I.?< r ,: :
former ' v. . .. "?...... -j .
ir-oiii ern an iggr ' 110,8011 M
i' V ? >;:. .ul '.. cunlr.v fe w; b .
? icuee .. MM?W Clinton and Ec
Wirt?a ? . We nut a fair <
' ''?"".'. ? ..j iine of th: : road I
.. ;?ar:v*s. Beside all the.
: .ui immense enan tities marketed i
^vyi'rem the ?urro-uidTiig conntry. Tho li .
of ibo Grand Trunk bs? produced its share; t
SU Clair Iliver eouuiry h:.-> sent down no sm
amount, and many karo been shipped at St. ,'
si-ph, tho m?:ut!i of the Kaiatnazoonvor, and ott
points c :i I^.k- ilicliigan. Wo sum up our C;
mates of thc amounts tkipped thur: far ils fcllov
T.ncl??s.-.n r':r:rn!.HU.OOO bh
:.: icklsa? Simihern.110,000 ?
Detroit aed MUwankic.. 75.0M ?
:-:t. cif.ir i'.lvc:, ahoVes it Michigan,
au.l vtf&ms to l>- tro!-. 01.OOC '
AcC'-v:-'".110.CC0 .?
Thc price* paid have ranged from ?3.00 lo >1.2
R'a place the average itt ?:L50, although it W
probably cxco^l that rl-vire. Thi j gives tho rom
sum of $1,433,000 as '.h pi'oceodj of the sale,
spplca shipped eat (.:" ibo ikate. It is trulv
?...uro or wealth !.. or,i farmers that ought nol t
bo doiipisod, e msiderisg the little labor and cu
lay that il costs. Tbs orchards of the State wi
bceomo more valnablo from j var to year as til
trees increase in size and -.ge.
In this arti.'!-.: wo bare mads no referenco t
peaches and grapes, tho r.nu;:;i! trade in each (.
which wal nearly equal, if not exceed that c
apples. Oar Slate is rich ia fru?: alone.
TH?, total receipts from intornal rcvenur
from tho ?sL cf July las', to the 11th of November
inclasiTO, amounts to $137,365,382.^; tho raonthK
rcoeipta for July, t2!,?S3,470.75; August, 834.0G7,'
^.Sl<S?P^i?bcr- *p7.K?,4!fi,83: ?ctoWr, fJC,
*i1?fX?;nn-bit rc:fJ?{? 'or to-day amount b
$1,984,689.72..