Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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v to find that "ifelt much better, the _ Te^pains in my back and side were beginning to cease, and at the time of menstruation I did not have nearly as serious a time as hereto fore, so I continued its use for two months, and at the end of that time I was like a new woman. I really have never felt better in my life, have not had a sick headache since, and weigh 20 pounds more than I ever did, so I unhesitatingly recommend Vegetable Compound.**—Mrs. Mat Haule, Ed ge rton, Wis., President Household Economics Club. —$5000 forfeit If original of above letter proving genuineness cannot be produced. Women should remember there Is one tried and true remedy for all female ills, Lydia E. Pink- ham’s Vegretable Compound. Re fuse to buy any other medicine, yon need the best. —E Which ? A lean and potash-hungry soil, wasted seed, wasted labor and idle gins—A MORTGAGE. Or, plenty of Potash any bales and a OUNT. M Te front "the prow was "steam came through, in see that it was the bona tide article. We got into it and Buggies grasped some levers firmly and I curled up my mustache and glanced up at Miss Guinnes’s window — in No. 27 — and wondered if she was home. There was a terrific steamy clatter that near ly shook my shoes off, a cloud of smoke dashed into my eyes, and by the time I had assured myself that my head had not been snapped off we were In a strange street. The rate of speed that Buggies was going at was positively sickening. I am willing to swear that when our big fat wheels hit a manhole the whole engine jumped a foot. We went around corners on one wheel, with women fall ing limply into policemen’s arms on the curb, and the policemen shouting at us until their yells sank to a drone in the distance. We ran over a yellow dog and threw the animal into the air behind us in the most talented fash ion. It landed on the top of a brougham —a rather stylish position for a yellow dog. I noticed these things then, but they didn’t appeal to me as interest ing. The most interesting thing just then was the preservation of my life. It was in Buggies’s hand—I felt that —and Buggies was about as careless of it as though it was the life of a llock- away oyster. We dashed into the Park on a curve that shot a fan of gravel off of the near wheel and all over a belated May party, which immediately looked to me like a coterie of landslide victims being dug out. A mounted policeman put his horse at us, but he got In the trail of our gasolene gas, from the exhaust thing in the back, and his horse balked. An old lady, trying to cross the drive ahead, just escaped be ing rolled out by such a close margin that her silk boa was whisked into the near fore wheel and twisted about the spokes while she could have said knife. Try it on an elVetric fan with a hand kerchief, frdin behind, and you get the line, effect. Later on. Buggies said, rould get the boa out and put It up ils den with a lot of other relics he was in .the habit of prying out I said, ^There’s a chunk the chain—I’m a-goin’ to T1 it out.” ‘Pull away,” said I. and I heard him give a grunt. Gee whiz! The Desper ado leaped like the arrow from the bow: I heard a wail of horror from Buggies, and the next thing I knew, he and the hill were gone, and I was ripping across the sheepfold like the front of a cavalry charge. I don’t remember rightly the rest of the trip I made through the Park in the Desperado; it’s more of a bad dream than anything else. The*; were crowds that dashed up on walls, yell ing, and mounted police that galloped after, yelling, and horses that sat down on can-iage shafts or tried to climb up with the coachman on the box—the coachmen yelling, too. I pulled all the movable bits of brassware that I saw, but there was no stopping her Then I grabbed the wheel and fiddled about trying to get the hang of how to steer the blooming thing—plunging for ward all the while, mind you, like a runaway engine. Finally, after a couple of wild runs onto walks and one complete circle, I got that straight, and started on, with a splintered park bench hanging over the prow, but happy, for at least I could put it to right and left. By this time it was dusk. As the Desperado thundered around another curve, the lake Tinfolded away down below, on my left. Suddenly I got an idea. I twisted the wheels, put the machine’s nose down the dusty slope and scrambled from my seat. Figuratively, I had washed my hands of all works. I slid over the back of the machine on my waistcoat, and dropped. My lapel caught on a hook. I was jerked in the air, sailed like a bird for twenty feet, broke loose sud denly, and struck the ground hard, but happily. Down below, in the growing twilight, I saw the Pea Green Desper ado swaying toward the water at light ning speed. A splash, a muffled con cussion—and a column of water shot into the air. Silence fell. After dinner I got on my hand- painted smoking coat that Miss Guinnes gave me last Christmas—I always put it on when I’m in a chastened mood— and smoked a pipe by the fire, waiting for Buggies. I knew he would come if be was all’— approach in Virginia Cornwallis w him; when in of the Natio territory we he took a creants’ gat trained the musket equa that of the mo' dian-fighters u ‘Mad Anthonj^^^S^H^ leader in battle was unsurpassed; but it should also be remembered that his record as a drill-master is unequalled.” carer mis- s, and th the urpass ods In- Snobg, Cads and Bounders. 'A knot of men at a club were trying to define the exact meaning of the above terms, and this was the general idea: A snob is a mildly pretentious per son, negative rather than positive, whose antics raise a smile but rarely excite anger. He may be extremely well dressed or he may be a sloven; generally speaking, he is a bore. A cad is a more active and militant character, whose entrance in a club causes some dismay, but not a revolt. In alluding to him as a bore some rather warm adjective is prefixed, part ly because he is difficult to evade, partly because he is apt to say or do something for which he deserves to be kicked, and the practical impossibility of doing so irks the others present. He is very deleterious to large eaters after dinner, since he arrests digestion and sends the blood to the head. The bounder is what might he called a gorgeous cad, beside whom a suob is rest and comfort. His briskness re duces you to aphasia and temporary cerebral anaemia; bis laugh curdles your blood. You cannot be charitable to a bounder; charity stops right there. He empties clubs and causes ruin to corporations and vestries by the vio lence of the passions he arouses. A noisy, screaming, superfluous peacock of a cad is a bounder, such as many a captain of a liner has longed to put in irons, for, weirdly enough, he is apt to escape seasickness in order to harass mankind when most helpless. — New York Times. What Doughnut la. "A doughnut, chIMren,** said the practical teacher of digestive econom ics, “is a round hole in the centre of a compound mixture o£ dyspepsia.”— Baltimore News, —