^tumorous department. SAW THE ERROR. A great revival was in progress at Mount Pleasant. The spring plowing had been done, and the little breathing spell that came in between the breaking-up of the land and the planting of the corn was filled in, on the part of the circuit-rider, with an effort to build up his church. On the secoud night of the devotional exercises, while the cricket cried on the old pine log and a fox barked away down the valley, the preacher and the congregation were astonished at seeing old Buck Slater arise and advance toward the mourner's bench. Time and time again had he been urged to humble - mt_ _ himself at toe altar. xne presiuiug elder of the district, yes, even a bishop, had doused him with the waters of persuasion and had sprinkled him with the perfume of imploration, but he had stubbornly maintained the position of the unconverted; so, no wonder that astonishment was expressed when, without warning and without having been lately assailed, he humbled himself at the yellow pine slab that had been wet with so many tears. For a time after he knelt down no one approached him, each exhorter seeming to be moderately reluctant to seize the great prize. After a time, however, the circuit rider knelt beside him, and, in a tone of soft solicitation, asked: "Brother?for I think that I may now so address you?have you at last discovered the error of your way ?" Old man Buck was mumbling something. "I do not understand what you say, Brother Buck. Speak a little louder, please." Old Buck continued to mumble. "Brother Buck. I am clad that you have turned from the error of your way ; but, really, I cannot understand what you are saying." The old fellow looked up and asked : ' "Talkin'to me ?" "Yes, brother, I am talking to you. What were you mumbling!" "I was tellin' the Lord that I reckon I'm the blamedest fool in Hancock county," "My gracious alive, you must not talk way. We cannot believe that your repentance is real if you do." "But, you bet, I know it's real, for I do know at the present writin' that I am the onerist fool in the country. Lemme tell you. I had as good a filly as thar was anywhar. I thought the world of her an' looked forward to the time when I would be a big man on her account, but what did I do? T'uther day' long come a Gypsy of a feller with the finest lookin' iron gray hoss you ever seed an' wanted to strike up a trade with me. I jes' know'd that thar was the chance of my life, for the iron gray was the puttiest thine in the world. Wall, I traded, an' all my folks was glad, but it rained last night, an' this morning what had happened? W'y, all the paint had washed ofifen that hoss an' he wa'n't nothin' but the ragged old gray that I sold in town last week for $30; so after cussin' till I could't cuss no mo' I concluded to come right over here an' git right down an' tell the Lawd that I am thea blamedest fool in Hancock county. Oy, yes, I have seed the error of my way?seed it putty plain, I can tell you." His Honeymoon.?The colored female cook of a family living at the South End came up stairs the other afternoon, and twisting up the corners of her apron with considerable embarrassment, said to her mistress : "You see, misses, I thought it mought be bes' to be tellin' you dat I?dat I done got married las' week." "Ah, indeed ! And what is your name now, Hannah ?" "Mis' Williams, ma'am. You see, my husban' he am a cook, too. He am what dey calls a sheft in a hotel." "A chef, heh ? That's very nice. And do you expect to leave us directly, Hannah ?" "Not 'rectly, mum. I'll stay wid ye for de present. You see, my husban' he's gone to New York an' Washington on his honeymoon, an' it'll be nigh onto six weeks befo' he comes back!" ttolP Elder Baker, who flourished in a rural district of New England a good many years ago, was a strictly honest but painfully frank old man. One day he was approached by old Zeke Bill, a man of doubtful reputation, who said, "Lookee here, elder, I waut to make a request of you, an' it is this : I want you to promise me you'll preach my funeral sermon, if you out live me." "Why, certainly, Zeke, certainly." "An' I want you to preach it from the text, 'An honest man is the noblest work of God.' " "I'll doit, Zeke, I'll do it; and I'll add that I'm sorry there's such a poor specimen in the coffin." fW~"\vnen you pone a loau, suiu old farmer Hornbeak, philosophically, "you can't tell which way he will jump, nor how far; an' it is jest about the same way with the average jury." "That so?" returned young Jay Green, in a noncommittal way. "Yep. For instance, iu the case of Plunk Sarvis, who has just been tried over at Kickhasset courthouse for pullin' out his brother-in-law's whiskers by the roots, in a fight, the jury discharged Plunk, and fiued his brother-in-law ten cents, the regular price of a shave. ?S?" "Do you think your sister likes me, Tommy ?" "Yes. She stood up for you at dinner." "Stood up for ne? Was anybody saying anything ayainst me?" "No, nothin' much. Faiber said be thought you were a good deal of an ass, but sis right up and said you wasn't, and told father he ought to know better than to judge a man by his looks." Wagsidr (gatherings. 86T There is a policeman in Chicago who is an active member of the Salvation Army. S&T Let every man do the best he knows, and if he is not a fool he will do about right. V&* A Methodist, in class meeting, said that he bad been a Christian "off and on for 30 years. I?" People eat 20 per cent, more bread when the weather is cold than when the weather is mild. t&~ If people were as anxious to live right as they are to die right, this would be a much better world. Do not wait for extraordinary opportunities for good actions, but make use of common situations. As reasonably expect oaks from a mush-room bed, as great and durable products from small and hasty efforts. W3T No churches are too handsome, if they are only paid for and made accessible to worshippers with moderate means. |6T It is estimated that the amount of gold in the world is about 613 cubic yards, and it would fit in a room 21 feet each way, if in a solid cube. I&T Don't give the children indigestible knick-knacks and then quarrel with Providence because you have to be up with their colics or restlessness at night. ? mnry m Q t?rv Vna H PPPfl QPfJ WP vau a uiau uia*? j u?w wife's sister in any part of America ? Not unless the sister is willing, and as a general rule, she isn't. She knows him too well. tSF "Preserve order, plesse! shouted a man on the platform to a restless audience. "There's no chance for preserves here!" a man yelled back. "There is too much jam." Be always frank and true; spurn every kind of affection and disguise. Have the courage to confess your ignorance and awkwardness; and confide your faults and follies to but few. A cyclone pit is a regular-part of the equipment of many Iowa schoolhouses jjow, and the children are drilled to escape from cyclones as children in other places have their fire drill. SbF An eccentric divine once said to his audience, "My hearers, there is a great deal of ordinary work to be done in this world; ana, mans me Lord, there are a great many ordinary people to do it." 58T "Do you think," he asked in hesitating accents, "that you could learn to love me?" "Yes," she replied, coyly, "I could learn, but I'm afraid you'll have a good deal of trouble teaching father." tctF The richest American president was George Washington. He was worth, when inaugurated, $350,000, which for those days was fabulous wealth. He was the richest man in the colonies for the time. Growler, when asked what he considered the saddest thing in life, said he was always miserable when he bad a big appetite and nothing to eat, and suffered terribly when he had plenty to eat and no appetite. A lesson in language: "What are we waiting on, conductor?" asked a passenger from Chicago, when the train came to a standstill. "We are waiting on the track," replied the conductor, who was a Boston man. 86T It is not the number of acres that a man skims over that makes him either a large or successful farmer. It is what he makes net, above cost of production, for his own toil and interest on the capital invested. AST" Why do birds not fall from the nerch when they are asleep? Be cause they cannot open the foot when the leg is bent. Look at a hen walking and see it close the toes as it lifts the foot, and open then as it touches the ground. gST She had sent off a telegram, and was waiting for au answer. Suddenly the peculiar halting click of the receiving instrument sounded in the office, and she said to her companion, "That's George, I know ; I can tell bis stutter." t8T Be honest with yourself, whatever the temptation ; say nothing to others that you do not think, and play no tricks with your own mind. Of all the evil spirits abroad at this hour in the world insincerity is the most dangerous. t8F An electrician 1 as invented a wonderful watch that will tell a man when his note is coming due. His watch would be a great deal more ? ' ?11 - - r..i :r remamaDie, as wen as useiui, u it would tell the man where to get the money to pay the note. There is no other such enemy to noble living and heroic achievement as worrying. But if we meet the hindrances and discouragements with undismayed courage, with persistent resolve and with unconquerable energy we shall master them, and in mastering them, carve royalty of character and worth for ourselves. 0?* A story is told of a western lawyer, who lately attended a religious meeting where he was called upon to offer prayer. Not being experienced in such a duty, he rose and attempted the Lord's Prayer, and succeeded very well until he came to the passage, "Give us this day our kfocwl whon frnm t.hft fnrpft nf VlCilJ, habit he immediately added, "with costs." B&F A servant girl living with a lady in Iowa came to her mistress one day, and said, "I'm sorry, ma'ra, but I'll have to leave you next month. Me and my young man are going to get married then." "Very well, Mary," replied the lady. "I hope, however, that you have given the matter careful consideration, and counted the cost in case one makes a mistake in marrying." "La, ma'am, it ain't going to cost me anything!" was the immediate reply. "He has to buy the license his own self, you know." ?he ?cllrt. A STRANGE FREAK THE INSPECTOR'S LOSS. Inspector Hookyer had served hi 25 years in the detective force; an< his colleagues were entertaining hin at a little farewell dinner, in anticipa tion of his forthcoming retirement The chairman having eulogized th< guest of the evening to an extent tha brought a blush to the face of tha cnse-hardened officer, the inspecto rose to reply, and at the finish hi said: "The chairman has said that I neve let a man slip through my fingers afte I had once got on his track, hut I an sorry to say he is wrong, i am oouu< to acknowledge that once an offende was too clever for me." "Tell us about it!" arose sponta neously from almost eyery throat and Inspector Hookyer, in respons< to the request, gave the story. "It was a good many years ago now when I had intrusted to me a case o a young woman named Eliza Thick broom, who had been found dea< (evidently murdered by having he throat cut) in some fields adjoining the canal near a town in Lancashire She had been a domestic servant, an< was of a retiring disposition, and bor< an irreproachable character. He: friends lived in quite another part o the country, and her mistress had n< knowledge of her keeping compauy o anything of that kind. For soun time I had considerable difficulty ii fixing the crime or any reason for i upon ahyone ; but at last, after a lot o inquiry, I ascertained that she ha< been walking out with a man namet Lamprey, who lived near Stockport in Cheshire, some 30 miles from wher Eliza Thickbroom resided. "It seemed that the girl had been ii the habit of spending her holiday when she had a day off, in going t< Stockport, where Lamprey met her and. that she had become engaged b him hnt that, hearintr something t< his discredit, she had refused to hav anything more to do with him ; and so far, nothing further was known U implicate Lamprey in the crime; bu I, of cousre, at once took the train ti Stockport and proceeded to hunt U] Lamprey, and to make inquiries in th town where he resided. "I knew nothing about him excep his name, but from the local police and cautious questions of one and an other, I ascertained that he had beet a sailor and was then a 'steeple jack, and one of the best climbers known. " 'Jack Lamprey!' cried one man t< whom I had spoken. 'Ah, he cai climb, for sure, can Jack! Why, h climbed up to the very top of yoi steeple (pointing to the church har< by, which bad a spire remarkably tall and slender, but very hard to mount) After the storm bad damaged thi weathercock, Jack climbed up an< fixed it all alone for the parson, am he refused to be paid for it.' "The man seemed to look upoi Lamprey's refusing payment as mor wonderful than his climbiog the steeple and perhaps he was right. Well, bi by bit, I found little things which when pieced tegether, pointed unmis takably to Jack Lamprey as the mur derer. He had, until recently, bee; seen frequently in and about Stockpor with the girl, but for the last two o three months she had not been observ in his company. He had been a joll; sort of fellow, but since the girl hai ceased her visits it had been uotice< that he had become moody aud silent and he had previously been a mos abstemious man. "He was away from his lodgings 01 the night of the murder, and on hi return early the next day he was trav el-stained, as if he bad walked a Ion; way. His laudlady remembered tha he told her he had fallen down ii some chemical works where he ha' been on a job, and had stained hi clothes; and she recollected that im mediately after his arrival home h< bad busied himself brushing and spong Ing his garments. "There yvas sufficient evidenee t justify me in obtaining a warrant; bu he was away on a job?no one kne\ where exactly, except that it wa ? ? ?V.?onr T.itrnrnAAl onH it wa aUUJOVUCIC ucai JiJiTVi|/vvi *%~v. .V ?i. useless for me to leave Stockport where I had the best chauce of catch ing bim,on a vildgoose chase to Livei pool, without better information. M; only course was to wait and keep quie till he came back, which he expectei to do the following day. "I took every precaution to preven any one knowing that he was 'wanted but some 'pal' must have got to sus pect it, an given him waruiug. Th police in Liverpool had been wired tc and had kept watch on all trains i the direction of Stockport, and towar the evening of the second day I receiv ed the intimation that a man resemb ling his description had taken th train, and was on his way. Assistei by a local detective who knew th man, I watched every passenger out c the train on its arrival out at Stockpori but no Jack Lamprey alighted, and, o inquiring of the guard, it seemed prel |ty certain that he bad got at Cheadh a station a few miles outside Stockpor uTt- ?Ko Komnnintr nf ivinfpr nn 11 ? UO IUV UVglUUtu^, v* tr*uvv< j night had set in, so that it was es treinely doubtful if we could follow the man ; but we took a train whic was just going out of the station, au in a few minutes were at Cheadle. there made certain that my man ha got out. He had booked for Stock port, and had given up his ticket; bu do all we could, we could get no trac of him. He had left the station in mediately on leaving the train; u one knew him, and we could find n one to tell us auything more. S( hoping perhaps to pick up a clew o the road, he walked back to Stockpoi and on to the town where he live< which was a few miles the other sid< but our tramp was in vain. "We had left instructions at Stockport for Lamprey's lodging to be : watched ; but by some blunder a man bad not been sent there for some time, ' and, much to my anger and disgust, when I arrived at his house I found that he had been there, just for five minutes, his landlady said, and had s left again with a bag of clothes, i "I was mighty savage, you may i guess, both with myself and with the - police of the place for not keeping a better lookout; but it was no use losing e my head over it, and I at once set to t work dodging his footsteps after be t had left his lodgings. In the public r house which he frequented I came e across a man to whom I had previously spoken, who seemed to know Lamr prey in a very distant sort of way, and r I turned the conversation on the man i I wanted. 1 " 'Ah ! I've just seen him,' said the r fellow. 'About an hour ago, or mayhap a little more. He was going to - Macclesfield, he said, to catch the ear. l?r train in th? mm-nina into Stafford , J " ? o ? s shire, where he's got another job. He seemed in a mighty hurry, too." j "I had reason afterward to think f that this man was the one who had - given Lamprey warning, but whether 1 that was so or not, his information that r night appeared to be correct, for I met r several people who had seen Jack goi. ing across the fields toward Marple, i which was bis best way of getting to b Macclesfield from the place he lived r in ; but when I arrived at Marple staf tion I was at fault again, for no train a had been out for quite two hours, and r although I waited till the last train to e Macclesfield had left, Lamprey did not 3 show up. t "Tired, and vexed beyond descripf tion, I tramped back and got what rest j I could, hoping that something might i turn up in the morning to assist me in ,, recovering the ground I had lost, but e afraid that for once I had let my quarry slip, and that I might never catch a him, now that he was aware he was , being tracked. a "Sure enough, the something did turn up in the morning, and something a which confirmed my fears, though I a felt that I had got my man dead if I e had missed him alive. The postman , come round soon after seven before it - "?? lirrVif onrt T Vififl nnlv ant, tin J woo ~ J o r t when a boy came, running with a letd ter, which had been delivered at the p police station. It bore the Marple e postmark, and was addressed to 'The Detective from London.' t "Tearing it open, I read something 3 like this: " 'From John Lamprey. I know i you are after me, and I know what for. I managed to keep out of your way tonight, and I meant to try and 3 get down south, but you are sure to a have me, sooner or later, so I've detere mined to make an end of it. Look at a the church steeple when you get this i tomorrow morning.' I, "The church steeple was a tall and i. prominent feature whichever way you e turned, and I had only to go to the I end of the street to get a full view of J it. When I got there and looked up, I saw something that gave me a start. In the uncertain light of the early e morning I could discern against the !, gray sky, hanging by the neck to one t of the iron loops which serve for a i, ladder on the side of the spire, the i- figure of a man ! " 'So much for Jack Lamprey !' I n said to myself, as I hurried to the t police station. 'He has saved me any r more trouble!' - 1 11 x 1 _ ' "iiy tne time i naa Deen io iuo s?iy tion and back to the church it was d broad daylight, and, of course, the d body hanging aloft had been seen and t, a crowd had already collected, every it one recognizing it as that of Jack Lamprey. u " 'A strange freak, I remarked to s the sergeant who was with me. " 'I don't think so,' he replied. 'Jack g had made himself a sort of hero over ,t going up the spire to repair the vane, a and there was nothing more likely to d occur to his miad than to finish his s career at the some place.' "There was no one round Stockport e who would venture up the spire, and a telegram had to be sent to Staylbridge for a man to come and get the o body down. It was past midday bet fore the steeplejack arrived, and by v that time half Stockport had heard of s the affair. Work was discarded, and s an immense crowd collected to witness ,, the sight. Every foot of the man's i- way up the steeple was watched by - thousands of eyes, and when, at last, y he approached the swayiug body of ;t Jack Lamprey, the tongues which had d been loudly wagging were hushed as by common consent. t "I shall never forget the few mm* utes that followed, while the steeple i- (now looking the size of a little child) e made his way very cautiously close >, up to the body, and fixing a rope to it, n made his preparation for lowering it to d his assistant, who was waiting on the top of the square tower to receive it. i- There was something awfully sad and e solemn about it all! i "In due course the assistant receive ed the corpse, which he let* down to if the ground, and every one around me t, remarked that he swung it rather n roughly to the earth, without showing tr the respect which might have been 5, looked for. In fact, some actually t. called out 'Shame !' d "But all at ouce the hush which had fallen upon the crowd was broken v by a storm of jeers and laughter ! h The thing which had given us all this d trouble was nothing but a guy ! And I I never felt such a fool in all my life, d "So that he might get nearly a day's start, Laprey had cleverly misled me it the night before. While I had been :e wasting my time at Marple, he had l- been employed in stuffing the suit of o clothes which he had taken from his o lodgings with straw, making a very >, passable representation of himself; - * * i" / L ~ 1 3 n and toe miaaie 01 me uigut ue nuu rt climbed the steeple (which was child's I, play to him), and left his effigy there ?, to deceive me and lull me into inaction. "I need not dwell upou the chaff I received. It is too painful, even' now, for me to recall without annoyance, but you may be sure that I quickly I made myself scarce." "Did the fellow get clear away ?" asked some one. "Yes. He took the train to the east coast and succeeded iD getting to Hoiland unnoticed," replied Inspector J Hookyer. "But he hanged himself in j real earnest some considerable time J afterward, leaving a letter behind admitting his guilt, and stuting that bis conscience troubled him so that be _ could not bear to live." Wl &AKlMC ! POWDER i Absolutely Pure. A cream of tartar baking powder. Highest of all In leavening strength.?Latest United States Government Food Report. Royal Baking Powder Co., New York. rail m nil RA1L1A9. r Schedules in Effect from and Aftei k August 30, 1896. ti G. W. F. Harper, Receiver, a , e CENTRAL TIME STANDARD. going north. | NO 10. | NoBOT ^ Lea^ e Chester 8 20am 8 80am i* Leave Lowrysvllle 8 -16 am 9 03am e Leave McConnellsvllle 904am 9 39am e Leave Guthriesvllle .... 9 12 am 9 50 a m ti Leave YorKvwe j waoara iuounnj i Leave Clover 10 18 a m 11 83 am Leave Gastonla .. i 10 56 a m 150pm Leave Llncolnton 11 55 a m 3 16 pm Leave Newton ..... 12 50pm 4 45pm Leave Hickory 123pra 6 15pm g Arrive Lenoir 230pm' 8 00pm a GOING 8QCTH. | NO. 9. | No 81. " Leave Lenoir i 240pm| 6 30am Leave Hickory ; 3 42 p m ' 8 10 a m Leave Newton i 5 08 pm I 9 10 am a Leave Llncolnton I 5 55pmjl0 30am Leave Gastonla : 6 57 pm 1 00 pm Leave Clover j "37 pm i 202 pm " Leave Yorkvllle ' 8 06 pm i 3 10 pm (1 Leave Guthrlesvllle ... 8 29 pm I 3 40 pm | Leave McConnellsvl lie 8 38 pm 3 55pm u Leave Lowrysvllle ; 9 00pm 4 25pm Arrive Chester .: : 9 32 p m 1 5 10 p m Trains Nos. 9 and 10 are first class, and run daily except Sunday. Trains Nos. ] 60 and 61 carry passengers and also run J daily except Sunday. There is good con- . nection at Chester with the G. C. ossible cash prices. Graphic copies and stationery. Arrangements with thepubishers ot standard books, enable me to npply any not on hands in a very few lays. Lamm A Company's new sample book or FALL and WINTER clothing is on land, and we ask all who want a GOOD * ?TT IN GOOD GOODS to examine the ityles and prices before buying.