Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, June 08, 1887, Image 4
^umawus cjrartmcut.
"Save That Hog."?An oid sailor recently
spun a yard to the Martha's Vineyard
Herald,in which he said: "Aspanking
breeze was driving the ship, everything
drawing alow and aloft, when the
cry, 4Man overboard,' startled the ship's,
company. The captain came on deck, and,
looking over the taffraii of the rapidly receding
object and obser vine the good speed
the ship was making, saia, 'Poor fellow.
God help him; I'm sorry for him, but we
must take advantage of this breeze in the
J ?* ?? nmnoKi ' Tnof fhon a (mil.
llilCiXTSV U1 ?UO V T? UV?WI VMWH WMVM M
or who had been on the lookout ran aft
and said, 'Captain, it was not a man, but
a hog.' 'Aha,' said the captain, 'hard
a-port, back the main yard, clear away
the boat, and save that hog.' "
A Great Problem Solved.?Drunk
man?"Professor, 'fessor! Come here?
hie?secon'. You're 'neducated man.
'Portant question wants to ask ye. Want
to ask ye?shay?hie?is th' earth round ?"
Professor?"It is approximately round,
my friend. It is what scientific men call
an oblate spheroid, but in ordinary, common-place
every-day conversation it is
perfectly proper to speak of it as round."
Drunk man?"That settles it."
Professor?"Settles what, ray friend ?"
Drunk man?"Solves the problem,
splains the riddle, Ioocid&tes the mystery.
Explanation perfectly satisfactory, sir.
Every thin' splained boofully. Knew
suthin' matter the earth. Can't stan' upon
the blamed thing. S'round. 'Counts for
it. Can't stan' up on a blame roun'
thing 1"?Zynn Union.
Too Smart.?A business man of Detroit
has just discharged a clerk for being too
facetious. It is to be hoped the lesson will
be heeded by other young men inclined to
be funny. The employer sent out to purchase
a blue lead pencil. When the boy
returned with the pencil the clerk remarked
gravely :
"Tnat expense might have been saved,
sir." , / :;
"By what means?" demanded his em- j
ployer.
"An ordinary pencil can be made to
Write blue."
"Indeed," said the gentleman, becoming
interested, "how would you manage
It?"
"Rv simDlv writing b-l-u-e."
Hefeels blue now."
I?*"Did you look under the bed?" inquired
a wife of her husband after he had
turned out the light and got fairly settled
for a good night's rest. "No," was
the blunt response. "Well, suppose there
is a man there," said the alarmed woman.
"I dont want to see him if there is," was
the answer. Well, get up and Ipok; I
shall not let you rest until you do." He
knew her of old, and, after fumbling
around found a match, lit it and looked
under the bed and whispered: "My dear,
there is a man under the bed."
"Oh, get out!" was the guick response.
"You can't fool me. I know better."
Then she turned over perfectly satisfied
and went to sleep. She had accomplished
her object.?Elmira Gazette.
Maxie's Nose.?Maxie was the little
6-year-old daughter of a clergyman who
had taken great pains with her religious
instruction, and had held before her the
goodnessof the Supreme Being, so that
she should have in her mind always His
kindness and mercy as well as power.
One morning her mother, passing the open
door of the room in which the child was
playing saw Miss Maxie standing on a
chair before the mirror, with her face
close to it, scrutinizing her little phiz with
great earnestness, and with a long sigh she
remarked:
"I don't see how God could have given
me such a nose, when He knew how particular
I am."?Harper'8 Magazine.
* * """ *
Grass Medicine.?You have all doubtless
seen or heard that dogs bite off and
eat grass as a remedy for sick stomach.
At a corn husking, one afternoon, one
of the huskers was exercising his wit upon
a ten year old lad, chafing him so unmercifully
that the little fellow subsided into
a rueful silence. The man finally paused,
coughed, rubbed his stomach, and said
that he felt a little sick.
"Eat some grass," gravely advised the
boy.
? A 1 *?not s\f Hid
J.nut ooy wore HIO piuino MIC >ra? VI n.v
evening.?Greensboro Workman.
He Would Wait Awhile.?"Maype
I haf to fail before spring." said a Pennsylvania
merchant to a traveling salesman
who was trying to sell him a bill of goods.
"But you are worth $40,000 and have
only $10,000 worth of stock. You'd have
to pay $4 for one if you failed."
"Great hefens! vhusit like dot? Vhell,
den I keep right on, and you may send me
some more sugar und tea und coffee. I
vait until I vas vorth $10,000 and haf $40,000
vorth of stock."? Wall Street News.
A Fair Valuation.?Lawyer (to client>j-You
want to sue Robinson for $500
for libel, you say ?
Client?Yes ; he has blasted my character
forever.
Lawyer?You think $500 the proper
amount?
Client?Well, make it $250. I only want
what's right.?Harper1 s Bazar.
It was spiteful but spitefulness cannot
be legislated out of numan nature.
"Did you near that Mrs. Smith is having
her picture painted?" "You don't say!
That old thing!" "Yes, indeed ; painted
in oil." "Well, I never! In oil! If she
ever wants to have a good likeness she'll
have to be painted in vinegar."
SST'Omaha Man?"Well, like all the rest
of us, you married an angel, of course?"
Young Husband?"She is not an angel in
one respect but she is in another."
"Found that out, eh?" "Yes; angels
don't wear $50bonnets. Shedoes." "Oh,
but she is an angel in one respect you
think?" "Yes; angels can't cook. Neither
can she."
A Confusion of Ideas.?Omaha manSeems
to me your face looks familiar.
Ain't youjhe dentist who pulled a tooth
for me In .Blank uity r
Stranger?I used to live in Blank City,
but I am not a dentist. I was a justice of
the peace for some years there.
Oh! now I know. You are the man
that married me.?Omaha World.
A Gallant Young Man.?She (gazing
upward)?How bright the stars are tonight,
Mr. Samson!
He (promptly)?They are not brighter,
Miss Clara, than?than?
She (softly)?Than what, Mr. Sampson?
He?Than they iivere last night.?New
York Sun.
Young Man (whispering tojeweler)?
"That engagement ring I bought of you
yesterday?"
Jeweler?"What's the matter with it?
Didn't it fit ?"
Young man (cautiously)?"Sh! It didn't
have a chance. Gimme collar buttons for
it."
What He Hoped.?Brown?What was
it that Fogg said to you about me ?
Boggs?He said you were no better than
you should be.
Brown?I hope you told him I was.?
Judge.
J6T "Don't be a fool," she said, with a
snap, to her husband.
Why didn't you tell me that when I
asked you to marry me?" he replied, and
silence fell upon that house.
I?- A red-nosed gentleman asked a wit
whether he believed in spirits. "Ay, sir,"
replied he, looking him full in the face,
"1 see too much evidence before me to
doubt that."
Don't look at your boy when he is
speaking," writes a father. "It embarrasses
him when he is explaining how he
happened to be in school and out playing
ball at the same time."
t&- A contemporary mentions a case beyond
the ordinary oculist. It is that of
a young lady you, instead of a pupil, has
a professor in her eye.
"
IIIMImwks ?Miug.
THE BOOK OP MORMON.
The recent conference of the Josephites,
or Monogamous Mormons, at Kirtland,
Ohio, and the extended reports of their
proceedings in the Globe-Democrat, says a
correspondent of that journal, has renewed
public interest in the peculiar faith
to which members of this church subscribe.
The origin of the book of Mormon
has never been clearly established.
The Latter Day Saints, of course, accept
the statements of Joe Smith and believe
it to be an inspired work. The general
public however are hardly as credulous
and regard the alleged Bible as a
fraud?the work of some clever romancist
rather than as the translation of hieroglyphics
on golden plates by a nineteenth
century prophet. The Spaulding theory,
!1L AnO lit O I I 1) W) l]fl 111 tt>d
Willi YV llltll Cltij will. . J
with the subject is familiar, has the most
advocates. They hold that Spaulding's
manuscript of his romance, "The Mannscript
Found," fell into the hands of Joe
Smith, Sidney Rigdon and others, and
from that fanciful work was constructed
the Book of Mormon. If this be true it
will astonish orthodox church people to
learn that a Congegational divine, one of
the foremost of his time in New England,
is responsible for the introduction of the
"twin relic of barbarism," as the Utah
Church has been called, in this country.
| Rev. Ethan Smith who died at an advanced
age early in the "forties" was one
of the lights in the Congregational Church
in New England. A man of deep learning.
he wasat.once a preacher, author and
philosopher, lidding to many ideas far in
advance of his time. One of his pet hobbies
was the belief that the North American
Indians were descended from the lost
tribes of Israel, who came over to this
continent several hundred years before
Christ, built great cities and reached a
very high state of civilization.
Rev. Dr. Smith wrote a work on the
subject, which after completion he decided
not to publish, fearing that it might injure
his reputation as a theological writer.
This book was an elaboration of the theory
Dr. Smith so long maintained. Taking
as the foundation the migration of the
best tribes of Israel to the western continent,
it described the hegira from Palestine,
the establisment of the Jews in
what is now central America and Mexico,
the founding of a great empire, and its
gradual decline and fall. It told of magnificent
cities inhabited by an enlightened
and Christian people. The author claimed
for them a civilization equal to that of
Egypt or Jerusalem. Hundreds of years
passed, and the history of the eastern
nn tha woslpm f'nnt.i
| JCWS was icj;cavcu vu knv. <T
nent. Quarrels between the various tribes
sprang up, bloody wars were waged and
the process of disintegration began.
Gradually the people were scattered,
their cities destroyed and all semblance to
a nation was lost. Thousands perished by
pestilence and the sword, and the remnants
of a once mighty nation relapsed into a
state of barbarism. From them their descendants,
Dr. Smith claimed, were the
Indians of North America and the Aztecs
of Mexico. This is exactly similar to the
story told in the book of Mormon.
Solomon Spaulding was a warm admirer
of Dr. Smith, and when a young man
studied under his tuition. He became interested
in his theories regarding the settlement
of America, and in return Dr.
Smith took the young student into his
confidence and granted him a perusal of
his unpublished book. Spaulding was
deeply impressed with the truth of this
theory and pursued his investigations
even further than Dr. Smith had ventured.
Taking the latter's views as expressed in
his book, Spaulding some years later wrote
his famous "Manuscript Found," which
afterward fell into the hands of Joe
Smith and was reconstructed into the
Book of Mormon. Indeed it is not at all
unlikely that Dr. Smith's original manuscript,
which, it is said, Spaulding had in
his posession, suffered a similar fate. At
any rate it has never been seen since.
These facts are told your correspondent by
a grandson of Dr. Smith, now residing in
this city. He states that the Book of Mormon
differs very slightly, as far as its general
outline is concerned, from the historical
romance written by his grandfather
sixty or seventy years ago, and he is quite
certain that the Mormon faith is founded
on the production 'of that worthy pastor's
fertile imagination.
?
AX OLD SLAVER.
In glancing over the register at the
Crow House on Monday, the eyes of the
Neics man chanced to fall upon a name
itrKlnK rnn/1
YV1J1V1I 4 V/WU
John McFall, Alabama.
There was nothing in the name or the
chirography that would attract any particular
degree of attention, but the scribe
was on the inside track and accordingly
hunted up the gentleman. He was found
without much effort, and unknown to the
colonel an interview was obtained.
Col. John McFall, formerly of Cokesbury,
S. C., is a gentleman 61 years of age,
extremely pleasant in conversation, and
a man who has a wealth of experience.
"Colonel," said the News man, "you
were connected with Lamar, were you not,
sometime about in the sixties?"
"Oh, yes. I was mixed up with Lamar
in a little trade and traffic with Africa, in
1860."
"You imported slaves, did you not?"
"Yes. There were some 26 parties interested
in the expedition, some of New
Orleans, Mobile, Montgomery, Charleston,
Richmond and other points. 1 had
charge of the entire affair.
"We boughtthe Wanderer in New York,
and after fitting her out thoroughly we
sent her over after her first cargo of the
people of color. She was a daisy, too, I
tell you. She could outsail almost anything
that floated."
"l5id you go over with the Wanderer ?"
"The first trip. That time we brought
over 365 negroes. We landed them at
Thunderbolt, just four miles below Savannah.
That many negroes in those days
meant a great deal of money."
"How did you manage to get them
away from Africa without government
interference ?"
"That was easy enough. We paid the
nigger king, or ruler, $5 a head for all we
took away. The way we had to get them
was this: We would build a' large stockade
of the immense bamboo canes, as big
around almost as a man's thigh ; near the
entrance of this we would spread a kind
of barbecue with plenty of mean whisky ;
we put plenty of tobacco into this liquor
to sorter make them sick and all the more
helpless.
"When the negroes would get up into
the mouth of this stockade they would
very often halt, but a few punches with a
sharp cane would get them well into the
! enclosure.
| "Well, after they were well under the
j influence of the liquor, and perfectly help|
less, the nigger government would have
| them taken on board the Wanderer, and
I then collect the ?5 for each one.
"The only danger we had to look out
! for was the wagging of the British Lion's
I tail. But we got the best of the tiery un:
tamed beast. We had the Wanderer re!
built with water tight compartments, and
a false smoke stack. Whenever a British!
er hove in sight we would set the smoke
to coming out of the stack, open one or
two of the water compartments, so as to
sink the vessel a little,-and go on unmo1
lested. You see that the point was that
j no one would ever suspect a steamship of
! carrying slaves."
! "So you- made the trip all right ?"
i "Oh, yes, the first one. But the second
one they nipped us. I didn't go over on
the Wanderer that trip, but took command
! of the vessel that was to lighter the nei
groes to shore when the Wanderer hove in
j sight with them.
"Well, we were cruising around off" the
I coast of Florida trying to sight our ship,
! when the revenue cutter Harriet Lane hove
I insight, and we turned our heels on her
I and got up and fled. The Lane chased us
i hot all that day, but when night came on
i we dodged into a little river on the coast
! and gave her the complete shake.
! "She prowled around there and the next
day captured the Wanderer fifty miles
from where we were trying to sight her.
"That settled the business, and we abandoned
the enterprise. I then went on to
attend the^Confederate caucus which caused
the break in the country."
Col. McFall is one of those orginal and
interesting talkers who holds his listeners
long and well, and intersperses his narratives
with many comical expressions. Although
he was heart and soul with the
South in her struggle, the Union can boast
no better subject to-day.
One of his quaint experiences, as related
to the Neivs man, was at Port Royal in
1876, when the negroes were going to mob
the whites. Upon this occasion the Colonel
mounted a stump and said:
"What in the world do you want to mob
me for? You seem to forget that I was
the man who brought you fellows over
here from Africa to make Senators, Congressmen
and respectableneople of you!"
This seemed to have the desired effect
and the angry crowd left Col. McFall unmolested
.?Chattanooga Neics.
TEACH YOuTsON A TRADE.
The main trouble of society at present
lies not, as people imagine, with the working
men, but with those that do not want
to work, whether among the capitalists or
the laboring class. There are altogether
*"? "nnnlo in hrtfh tho hlKinPM
IUU IllilliJ 111 UUVM IMV
and the workshop who want to reap without
having sown, who are determined to
acquire money at all hazards, by legitimate
means if they find them, and if not,
then by illegitimate ones. Our age of
steam and electricity has robbed us of one
precious virtue, without which man will
never become contented and happy, and
that is patience. This feverish restlessness
of ours urges everybody along to risk all he
owns, even the honor which is beyond the
possibility of repair, for the sake of making
money over night. And this foul air
infects the young, the son of the artisan
and farmer as well as that of the wealthy
merchant. Speculation, instead of thrifty
labor, is considered the only road to fortune;
hence the daily increase of defalcation,
of breach of trust, and all sorts of false
dealings.
There is only one golden road to happiness
and prosperity?it is patient, preserving
labor. Mother earth yields her rich
produce only to those who have deserved
it by ennobling sweat of untiring labor.
She shows neither favors nor predilections
to any. Labor alone, whether agricultural
or manual, offers true satisfaction. Its
reward lasts. Fortunes that are quickly
gained are too often also (juickly lost.
A good, diligent workman is niever at a
loss about his future. He is safe anywhere
and at all times. It is wrong and imprudent
of a father to put all his boys, if he
has many, into business, without having
them first taught some handicraft or profession.
One of them is almost sure to become
shipwrecked in the great struggle
for existence, and if all succeed it is by adventure
rather than by wise foresight. We
must, even in the estimate of the wealthy,
have industrial labor raised in value and
capital lessened.
There are more young American men in
the penitentiaries in this country learning
trades than there are outside of them. The
principal cause of this is that we are educating
young men for gentlemen?trying to
make lawyers, preachers, doctors and clerks
out of material that nature intended for
blacksmiths, carpenters, sailors and other
honest "hewers of wood and drawers of
water." It is a mistake and a big one
too, to make the boys (and girls too) believe
that to labor is disgraceful, and to do
nothing for a living is more becoming the
society in which they expect to move and
have respect. Hang such society! It is
rotten to the core to-day, and there are
many men's sons and daughters who are
now being educated to play the part of
"leading lady" and "walking gentleman"
in the great drama of me, wno win ngnr
out for a poo'r house or a penitentiary before
they have played their parts and the
curtain drops.
Young man! get thee to a tannery, to a
tinshop, to a chicken ranche. You can
soon become your own boss, independent
and commander of your own little kingdom,
if you are prudent and economical,
but never wear out your young years, behind
either counter or desk and spend
your salaries for having your hair parted
in the middle in the hope of catching the
heiress who prefers her father's coachman.
Boys, you can always become deckhand
pothouse politicians; everybody can sew
dry goods and clothing, or act as clerk in
the mint, custom house or postoffice, but
every one can't earn a living like a good
mechanic if he is thrown out of office.?
Henderson Gold Leaf.
A Task of Great Peril.?The task of
successfully boarding an iceburg with
picks and bars is no easy one. It is almost
as exciting as the pursuit of a whale, and
is often full of danger to the unwary. It
is the testimony of those who have experience
in this business that you cannot
judge an iceberg as simple men frequently
attempt to judge a horse?by mere outward
appearances. The berg you are approaching
may tower up majestically,
with a glistening rounded summit like
the dome on the Capitol at Washington, or
it may rear splendid picturesque spires,
like those of a cathedral, or be turreted
like the castle at Windsor. Its vast proportions
and architectural beauty may give
it in your eyes an appearance of enormous
stability, while in truth its foundations are
rickety and unstable.
There is no way of telling what an apparently
sedate iceberg may indulge in at
any moment. Its submerged base may be
a gigantic mass balancing the exposed portion
of the berg as firmly upright as a
house built upon a rock, or it may be the
most veritable fraud and makeshift of a
foundation.
Icebergs rising hundreds of feet in the
air, with brilliant scintillating turrets and
spires have been known to topple over
without a moment's warning. Lnlike the
forest trees and other works of lofty nature
on the land, decay in the iceberg begins,
not at the top, but at the root, the warmer
temperature of the water melting it at its
base. Moreover, the iceberg seldom presents
?n easilv accessible side to those who
would board it, the task of boarding a berg
being very much in the nature of scaling
a perpendicular wall of glass, with constant
and immediate danger of a slide into
the sea. The occupation in which these
hardy fishermen are engaged is thus one of
much greater peril than one would at first
imagine.
The Vegetable Life in the Evkuglades.?The
Everglades of Florida present
a world of vegetable life of a semitropical
character. The Indiarubber tree
abounds in sufficient growth to suggest its
subjection to utility. Many of the trees
are of large size, varying from twenty to
fifty feet in height, and having diameters
often exceeding two feet. Their growth is
suggestive of many purely tropical species,
the limbs bending over and taking root in
the soil. When notched they emit a white
fluid in large quantities, which gradually
thickens and becomes dark in color. The
cabbage-palms are the most conspicuous
objects throughout the regions. They
grow on all islands and on the outskirts. |
Their appearance in a windstorm is very
much like a cluster of inverted umbrellas
braced against a gale. The cypress presents
the same peculiar appearance here
as elsewhere. Its roots bend over, above
ground and water, with an appearance not
unlike a human knee when doubled.
These innumerable projections, appropriately
termed "cypress knees," are undoubtedly
the culmination of an effort on
the part of nature to propagate new trees,
j with the result of producing rudimentary
| trunks. Buttonwood, ash and other trees,
I are found on the islands, and intersperse !
i the environing clumps of woodland. The j
i most dense semi-tropical growth lies be- 1
| tweeu Lake Okeechobee and the sawgrass. j
| Here is a belt of trees comprising every i
I species of the regions, thickly interlaced j
i with the vines of gourd, and often forming I
I a solid, almost impenetrable, wall.
?
The Ripest Year of Human Life.? ;
The venerable James Jackson, who was I
the Nestor of the medical profession for so j
long a time in Boston, used to say that a j
man came to the prime ofohis effective
faculties when he was sixty-five years old. j
He said it was true that the curve of phys- j
ical strength was then declining. But ex-!
perience, and the ability to act, which
i comes from experience, are, of course, constantly
improving while memory holds, j
According to Dr. Jackson, the curve of ex-;
perience, and the curve of physical life j
cross each other at the age of sixty-five. 1
AN ANCIENT TRADE.
The practice of stretching the tanned
skin on a wooden frame, as is the custom
of European saddlers, and the semicircular
knife in vogue with the curriers of the
peresent day, are both distinctly represented
at Thebes.
It is a singular circumstance that the
Chinese have no acquaintance with the
process of tanning by vegetable juices, but
use only mineral and animal subtances;
hence the inferiority of their prepared
skins.
In addition to sandals the Egyptian curriers
made the coverings of seats of sofas,
bow-cases, quivers, the furniture of war
chariots, and the decoration of harps, and
shields. Stamped and beautifully embossed
leather straps have been frequently
found fastened round the mummies.
Many pieces of skin and leather from
the Egyptian tombs still exist in a state of
perfect preservation which passed through
the hands of the tanner more than thirty
centuries ago, and which, but for the invention
of this process, must have perished
in a few hours after they had left the
carcass from which they were stripped.
ine mynaas 01 victims emiu iu mo
Jewish sacrifices must have afforded the
skin market a copious supply. The scarcity
of glass, pottery and earthen-ware
would, however, cause a constant demand
for leather bottles and d^inking-vessels,
and these, by reason of climate, defective
manufacture and by exposure to the fermentation,
were very perishable?perhaps
even more so than the brittle Vessels of
glass and clay.
The shoe-makers are one of the very
lowest castes in India. Leather is considered
unclean by the Hindoos, and consequently
those who work in it are defiled.
It is alleged of the shoe-makers that they
eat the flesh of domestic animals that die
a natural death. They drag or carry away
the carcass to their own part of the town
or village, cut it up in pieces, and distribute
it amo~g themselves it sufficient portions,
and clean the hide and put it away
for sale or to be manufactured into something.
Oniy one tanner is mentioned in the
Bible?the Simon, who was in all probability,
a member of the church at Joppa,
in whose house Peter found a temporary
home when the messengers of Cornelius
were informed: "He lodgeth with one
Simon, a tanner, whose house is by the seaside."
There are numerous wells of water
in close proximity to the town of Joppa.
This would render it a suitable locality
for a tannery, and the adjacent port
would facilitate the shipment of a cargo in
great request not only throughout all the
Mediterranean coasts but far up the Nile
and among the semi-civilized dwellers of
Northern Europe. Several tanneries of
great antiquity still exist- near the shore,
one df which is said by tradition to have
been that of Simon the tanner.
BILL NYE'S WATERBURY.
But that has nothing to do with what I
was speaking of. In a thoughtless moment
I decided to open my Waterbury
watch and see what made it tick so loudly.
I did so.
When I opened the rich and highly chased
case, I began to see strange, fantastic
IV\?nr>o Hiicli hafni-o IY11T avw Tn ft short
iWiUJC* uaou wwviv ll,j V.J
time my lap was full of little wheels and
small fragments of the future which this
watch had concealed about its person.
I accumulated a bureau drawer full of
fly-wheels, hair triggers, cams, eccentrics,
dolflickers, bull wheels clogged with forgotten
moments, ratchets with a thin falsetto
voice, small brass wheels with axle
grease on their circumference, brassy
smelling- axle trees, little yellow screws,
large steel screws with dark blue heads,
and other things that I do not know the
names of.
Then there was a low, asthmatic sound
in among the intestines of this time piece
and a big, blue, backward spring sprang
forth, hit me between the eyes, danced
back on its hii d feet, jumped up and
punched a hole in the ceiling, tried to spit
on his hands, smote its heels together and
darted up my trousers leg, meantime snarling
at me in that guttural, mean, quarrelsome
way that a Waterbury watch knows
so well how to assume.
I arose to go out into the hall, but three
'bushels more of the spring boiled out of
that yelping, muttering turnip, and gliding
to the door shut it in my face.
The front end of the spring had nowemerged
through my shirt fcollarand began
to bore holes in my head. I called for
help, but nothing save the low and desolate
murmur and rumble of the watch answered
me.
In a short time the room was full of this
spring. I was on the bed doing the Laocoon
act, in my poor, weak way, and everywhere
I could see the evidence of spring.
Finally the landlady came to see if I
had them again. She opened the door just
as the watch seemed to slip a new cog and
betray some more of its inwardness. It
shot some more of that blue steel out into
the hall, caught the landlady by her backhair
and hurled her down stairs.
When the police got there and got a line
repaired to come and unwind me, that Waterbury
watch had entire possession of the
first and second floor of the house and was
on its way down cellar.
And yet we meet men almost every day
who claim that the Waterbury watch is a
model of simplicity.? Bill Nye in Jewelry
News.
You Can't Make Death Cheerful.
"No," said a Brooklyn undertaker, "I
can't say that any one has adopted a
wreath of flowers as a death signal, as did
the Beecher family. You should think it
would become fashionable? Well, it
might. There are fashions in everything,
a,iQn nnriarfakinnr The idoa is riErht and
beautiful, but it isn't likely to grow. You
can't make death cheerful. The Chinese
are the only people who do. White's their
mourning color and flowers and feasts accompany
their funerals. They think a
man's life only begins when it ends?if that
is not too Irish for you. But this country's
different. The big knots of black that
flutter from bell knobs are not going to
vanish yet, and won't this side of the millennium.
Yet I'd rather hang up flowers
than crape."?New York Sim.
??
The Gum Shoe Mystery.?"What
makes rubbers wear out so fast nowadays ?"
was asked of a leather dealer.
"Oh, you needn't wonder at their wearing
out. They are made of old rubbers
ground up and mixed with a trifle of crude
gum."
"How extensively is that carried on ?"
"Well, a dealer told me of one manufacturer
who last year ground up 10,000 tons
of old rubber shoes to make new ones.
They pay three or four cents per pound for
them. I remember the time when you
could get what were then called gums,
made on a block in Africa, that would last
a man longer than a box of the frauds of
to-day. Still you can go to a trustworthy
dealer, and for SI get a pair of rubbers that
will last a year. A large number of factories
have been built just for the purpose of
grinding up old rubbers."
Cheese Two Centuries Old.?Boyd
Winchester, the consul-general of the
United States to Switzerland, has just completed
some exhaustive researches in regard
to the cheese industry of that country.
He has made certain discoveries that the
cheese makers of this country will be a
little slow to believe. He claims to have
seen cheeses that are more than 200 years
old. One of the customs that formerly
prevailed in the cheese region of that
country. Mr. Winchester says, was for the
friends of the bride and bridegroom to join
in the presentation on the wedding-day
of an elaborate cheese. This cheese was
used as a family register and heirloom on
which births, marriages and deaths are
recorded. He says that he has seen some
of these "old cheeses" that date back to
1GG0. In many parts of Switzerland cheese
forms the principal diet of the people. He
says the new cheese often causes sickness.
When this is the case the patient is treated
in the homoepathic fashion with old
cheese, which generally effects a cure.
White Slavery.?The condition of
some of the Pennsylvania ' miners, as
shown in an article elsewhere, reveals a
worse state of slavery prevailing in the
Keystone State than ever existed south of
Mason and Dixon's line. A good maDy
laboring men have laughed when the term
"slave" was applied to their fellow-work
men in the "protected" industries, but if !
a more complete ownership of man was
ever attempted than by the firm in question,
the fact has escaped the pen of the
historian. The Pennsylvania coal barons
are among Uncle Sam's most favored
children, and they take advantage of his
kind "protection" to not only mulct the
coal consumers, but to rob the poor miner
of every cent he earns and to take from
him the last remnant of personal liberty.?
Banner of Liberty.
Work as a Medicine.?You have
nothing to do?how easily you yield to
indisposition.
You have an engagement, you have an
article to write, a dress to make, a field to
till, a harvest to gather, a horse to groom,
a store to open, an occupation of some
sort or other whose call is peremptory and
must be obeyed?what a stiflfener of nerve
and muscles an engagement is. How infinitely
less prone one is to yield to an in
disposition, "a pain or a suggestion of idleness
and ease.
Work is the best medicine.
Exercise is its right hand man. Occupation
is what mankind needs, and just as
soon as we retire from life we may begin
to prepare for death, for life is a quick
imitator, and will retire from us, acting
on the hint given, that we are weary of
the burden and wish to shake it?Joe JIoicar(Ts
Letter.
Every man has to consider his temperament
when engaged in his work, and
particularly when thinking of his religious
duty. The man of stern, austere or violent
disposition has need to guard against
too great rigor, while the one of tender,
gentle feeling is required to be on his >
watch lest be become so complaisant as to
be unfaithful. The former is likely to injure
himself and his work by a disproportionate
contention over trifles, and the latter
by an easy-going way of treating
things that are very important. Some of
the theological wanderings of the period
are not the result of the new life from the
Scriptures, but the effect of the growing
kindliness of Christian society. The
thought of eternal punishment is disagreeable,
and therefore it is not indulged in.
A Canary's Four Notes.?In the song
of a canary four notes are recognized by
dealers, and they can tell by listening to
it for a very few minutes whether the bird
is German or American. They are the
water note, which is a rippling, gurgling,
attractive bit of warbling like the murmur
of a rill; the flute note, clear and ringing;
the whistling note, of the same class, but
very much finer, and the rolling note,
which is a continuous melody, rising and
falling only to rise again. It is in the last
named note that American birds fail.
They cannot hold it. Another difference
between the two is that German canaries
are night singers?they will sing until the
light is extinguished. But American birds
put their heads under their wings with
darkness.?Detroit Free Press.
4.^.^.
Temperance in Russia.?The scandal
of popular drupkenneas will doubtless be
nr...r>U nkntoi) in TCtiQQia Kit fha nPW avHhA
lUUUii (vuaigu iu avuwiw wj v**w mvi?.
law which is about to go into force. All
the saloons which exist merely for the
purpose of retailing grog will be closed, to
the number of 80,000. The sale of liquors
will be permitted only in hotels ana restaurants,
and licenses to these will be limited
in number according to the judgment
of the excise officers, and a fee of $725 exacted
foreach. The Russian Finance Minister,
i n announcing the new law, says that,
"While experience has proved that the
vice of drunkenness cannot be extirpated
by legislative measures, it is certain that
wise legislation can at least do much to
lessen the evil and contribute to the moral
development of the people."
aST" How often we hear the remark "We
shall have rain; the atmosphere is so
heavy." The reverse is true. When one
sees smoke hanging from a chimney, with
a tendency to sink to the ground, it indicates
that the atmosphere is light, in fact
too light to float the smoke. When
the smoke rises from the chimney it indicates
a heavy atmosphere. A column
of smoke is not a bad barometer, for a barometer
is nothing more than a recorder
of the pressure of the atmosphere. When
the atmosphere is light and the smoke
settles, the pressure on the mercury is light
and' the column falls indicating storm.
When the atmosphere is heavy and smoke
rises, the pressure is greater and the column
rises, indicating fair weather.
*?r-If you wish to know whether Christianity
is superseded try to live out some
of its eardiaal virtues. Try forgiveness,
lor instance. See if you find it a trite,
threadbare, overused habit in your own
life; see if it is something that comes to
you naturally and easily; see if it is a capacity
that you have so fully attained that
you can mete it out seventy times seven
to one who has persistently wronged you.
Try, and see; and then, perhaps, it will
appear that the man who could forgive
tne enemies that crucified Him lived
on a moral plane of life to which, the
world, with all it intellectual and material
advancement,, nus utu, yta risen.
ANALYZING THE BAKING POWDERS.
"Royal," Only, Found Free from Lime,
Alum and Phosphatic Acid, and
Absolutely Pure.
#
Under the direction of the New York State
Board of Health, eighty-four1 different kinds of
baking powders, embracing all the brands that
could be found in the State, were submitted to
examination and analysis by Prof. C. F. Chandler,
a member of the Stato Board and President
of the New York City Board of Health,
assisted by l rof. Edward G. Love, the wellknown
United States Government chemist.
The official report shows that a large number
of the powders examined were found to contain
alum or lime; many of them to such an
oxtent as to render them seriously objectionable
for use in the preparation of human food.
Alum was found in twenty-nine samples.
This drug is employed in baking powders to
cheapen their cost. The presence ot lime is attributed
to the impure cream of tartar of commerce
used in their manufacture. Such cream
of tartar was also analyzed and found to contain
lime and other impurities, in some samples to
the extent of 9:1 per cent, of their entire weight.
All the baking powders of the market, with
the single exception of "Royal," (not including
the alum and phosphate powder, which
were long since discarded as unsafe or inefficient
by prudent housekeepers), are made from
the impure cream of tartar of commerce, and
consequently contain lime to a corresponding
extent.
The only baking powdor yet found by chemical
analysis to be entirely free from lime and I
absolutely pure is the "Royal." This perfect '
purity results from the exclusive use of cream ;
of tartar specially refined and prepared by pat- |
cut processes, which totally remove the tartrate j
of lime and other impurities. The cost of this '
chemically pure cream of tartar is much greater
than any other, and it is used in no baking
powder but the "Royal."
| Pro!". Love, who made tucanalyses01 uniting
I powders for the New York State Board of \
j Health, as well as for the Government, says of
j the purity and wholesomeness of "Royal" :
"I havo tested a package of 'Royal Baking j
j Powder,' which I purchased in tho open marI
ket, and find it composed of pure and whole- j
some ingredients. It is a cream of tartar pow- :
der of a high degree of merit, and does not con- j
tain either alum or phosphates or any injurious
substances. E. G. LOVE, Pn. T>." |
June 8 23 tf
GARRY IRON RO(
Manufacturers of nil kinds of _
IRON ROOFING
CRIMPED AND CORRUGATED SIDING, MSHfkM
Iron Tile or Shingle,
FIRE PROOF DOORS, SHUTTERS AC.,
THE LARGEST MANUFACTURERS 01
TpSS" Orders received by L. M. GRIST.
May 10
COULDN'T HEAR IT THUNDER. 1
An interesting letter from Mr. John W.
Weeks, superintendent of DeKalb Pauper
Home:
From a feeling of gratitude and a desire to
benefit others, I voluntarily make this statement.
I have trreat reason to be thankful that ,
I ever heard of B. B. B., as I know what a 1
blessing it has been to me. I have suffered
with Bronchial Catarrh for a number of years.
Six months ago I was taken with severe pain !
in right ear, which in a few days began to discharge
matter, with terrible and almost unbearable
palpitation and all sorts of noises in 1
my head. In ten days after the commencement
of discharge and pain in my ear I began to grow
deaf and in six weeks I was so deaf I could
not hear it thunder.
I was then compelled to use a conversation
tube, and it was often that I could not hear
with the tube. I then commenced taking B.
B. B. and the running of my ear ceased running
in live weeks, and I can now hear without
the tube. My general health has improved,
palpitation ceased, and feel like a new being,and
appreciate the benefit I have received from B.
B. B. (made in Atlanta, Ga.,) with gratitude to
God and thankfulness to the Proprietors for
such a medicine. I cheerfully recommend it
to all who are afflicted with deafness and catarrh,
Try it; persevere in its use and you will be
convinced of its value. JOHN W. WEEKS.
Superintendent DeKalb Pauper Home.
Decatur, Ga., May 1, 1886.
BRIGHT'S DISEASE.
I have been a sufferer from Kidney and Bladder
troubles for several years. I have lately
had what is termed Bright's Disease, and have
had considerable swelling of my legs and
shortness of breath. The urea has poisoned
my blood also. I secured and am using (B. B.
B.) Botanic Blood Balm, and find it acts powerfully
and very quickly, and I am delighted with
its effects, i had previously used a large quantity
of various advertised remedies, and several
eminent physicians also waited on me, but B.
B. B. stands at the top. JOHN H. MARTIN.
Rock Creek, Ala., May 4, 1886.
All who desire full information about the
cause and cure of Blood Poisons. Scrofula and
Scrofulous Swellings, Ulcers, Sores, Rheumatism,
Kidney Complaints, Catarrh, etc., can
secure a copy of our 32-page Illustrated Book of
Wonders, filled with the most wonderful and
startling proof ever before known by calling on
MAY & MAY,
Wholesale dealers of B. B. B. Yorkville, S. C.
June i y iy
J. ED. JEFFERYS.
NEW FURNITURE STORE.
COFFINS.
A FULL supply on bands consisting of the
following kinds:
METALIC BURIAL CASES-adult sizes.
WOOD BURIAL CASKETS ANI) CASES?
all sizes.
GLOSS WHITE CASKETS AND CASES
for children.
PLAIN COFFINS?all sizes.
FURNITURE.
Walnut, Maple and Common Bedsteads.
Washstands, Tables, aud a general supply always
in Store.
Special orders filled at short notice.
REPAIRING.
All kinds of Furniture repaired. Terms liberal.
J. ED. JEFFERYS.
Piedmont Air-Line.
RICHMOND AND DANVILLE R. R.,
South Carolina DiviMion.
CONDENSED SCHEDULE
Iu Effect February 13, 1887,
(Trains run by 75th Meridian time.)
SOUTHBOUND. ' No. 52. J NORTHBOUND, j No. 53.
j j |
Lve. New York.. 3.40 P.M. Lve. Augusta... I 9.20 A. M.
Lve. Philadelphia. 5.42 P.M. Arr. Columbia... j 1.03 P.M.
Lve. Baltimore.... 8.00 P.M. Arr. Charlotte... I 6.15 P. M*
Lve. Washington. 11.00 P. M. Arr. Salisbury...' 8.01 P.M.
Lve. Richmond... 2.30 A. M Arr. Greensboro'| 9.47 P.M.
Lve. Charlotte.... I 1.00 P.M. jArr. Richmond.. 6.40 A.M.
Lve. Columbia.... 5.23 P. M. Arr. Washington 8.30 A. M.
Arr. Augusta j 9.20 P.M. Arr. Baltimore.. 110.03 A. M.
Arr. Savannah...! 7.40 A M. Arr.Philadelphla l2.35 P.M.
Arr. Jacksonville. 12.00 M. Arr. New York 3.20 P.M.
DAILY. DAILY.
I i!
Pullman Bullet Sleeper between Washington
and Augusta, on Trains 52 and 53.
JAS. L. TAYLOR, D. CARDWELL, SOL. HASS,
Gen'l Pass. Agent. Ass't Gen'l Pasg. Agent, Traffic Manager.
* Columbia, S. C.
February 23 8' u
FOUNDRY
AND
Machine Shop.
THE undersigned would respectfully inform
the public that he now has in operation, on
his lot on King's Mountain Street, a FOUNDRY
AND MACHINE SHOP, in which he is
prepared to do all manner of work in light iron
and brass castings, and general machine work.
REPAIRIXO,
Of all kinds, promptly done on short notice, ,
Steam Engines, and agricultural machinery of
any kind overhauled and repaired. Besides,
any class of work that may be wanted in his
shop, he will attend any cafl for repairing stationery
engines, doing the work oti the premises,
thus obviating the necessity of moyingthe
engine.
Prices reasonable. Terms, cash on the com- ,
pletionof the work. EDWARD THOMAS.
T. S. JEFFERYS.
THE CYCLONE EXTINGUISHER. 1
Tirzah, S. C., March 10, 1887.
Messrs. Jkfferys<fc Hoke, Gents:
THE Cyclone Spark Extinguisher put on my
engine a few months ago is giving entire
satisfaction. Before it was put on, my ginhouse
several times caught lire from sparks, so '
I had to quit running while the wind was blow- I 1
ing in the direction of the gin-house. Now I I '
can gin and saw with perfect safety, no matter
which way the wind blows. Haven't seen a live j
spark from the engine since I have been using it. j
And another good thing about it is, it can't wear i '
or burn out. Will last as long as the engine. I 1
think it a great invention, and wouldn't take
double the cost of mine if it was so I couldn't i 1
get another one. I think you ought to reduce 1
the present high rate of insurance on gin-houses 1
where these extinguishers are used on the en- j
gines, or, at least, recommend such to the com- I 1
panies you represent, because I see no risk !
whatever from the engine.
Very respectful lv, i !
HENRY MASSEY. |
i
BRIDGE CONTRACT. <
I 1
"VTOTICE is hereby Riven that the Hoard of j *
J3I County Commissioners of York county I
will meet at GOFORTH'S MILL, on the
Adair's Ferry road, on SATURDAY, the 18th I
day of JUNE, 1887, sit 10 o'clock, A. M. The !
ob]ect of the meeting is to let out to the ;
lowest bidder, THE BUILDING OF A NEW |
BRIDGE across King's Creek. The contractor :
will be required to give bond with two good i
sureties, in double the amount of bid, lor the i
faithful performance of the contract. Plans
and specifications can be examined at the ollice
in Yorkville, and also at Goforth's Mill, on day i
and date above mentioned. The Commission- i
ers reserve the right to reject any and all bids. <
By order of the Board.
JAMES B. ALLISON, Clerk. ,
May 25 21 4t i
>FING COMPANY,
jb IRON ORE PAINT
And. Cement.
152 TO 158 MERWIN ST.,
Cleveland, O.
Map*' Send for Circular and
^ ~r*TT\ 1 pr.ce Ljst No 75
f IRON ROOFING IN THE WORLD.
9 ly
INTER-STATES LIFE ASSOCIATION,
STAUNTON, VA.
M. ERSKINE MILLER, President.
C. L. COOKE, Secretary.
GEORGE C. JORDAN, General Agent.
THE immense amount of Life Insurance
carried in this country makes it of National
importance that heads of families should be
able to secure it as cheaply as possible consistent
with safety. Especially is this necessary
for the millions of men in moderate circum
stances, who must earn tneir living i>y naru
knocks and in the face of a competition that is
becoming keener and sharper every day.
If life insurance is not safe it is not worth
carrying, and if it is too costly, the men who
most need it cannot carry it all. How to make
it both safe and cheap is the problem of the
day, and he who solves it will have done a
great and patriotic service for his fellow men.
The Old Line Companies are certainly safe
when honestly managed, but their rates are
so high, that only the rich can afford to carry
such an amount as would provide for a family,
while the great mass of men, and those, too,
whose families most need protection, are compelled
to go without insurance, or seek it in
the assessment companies or secret orders.
The fact that these cheaper institutions are today
furnishing more insurance than all the Old
Line companies combined, shows how eager
are the mass of citizens for insurance that is
within reach of their means. While these
orders and corporations are furnishing insurance
cheap enough, yet, at best, they can only
be looked upon as temporary expedients aiul
not altogether satisfactory. But it is plain,
that somewhere between the old line and assessment
plans there must be a middle ground,
which is not only safe, but just and fair to all
parties,
THE INTER-STATES LIFE ASSOCIATION
of Staunton, Va., has sought earnestly
and honestly to find this middle ground. In
this search they have, at large expense, consulted
and employed the foremost actuaries
and insurance experts in this country, and upon
their recommendation have adopted a line
of rates which is entirely safe, and yet, is in
the reach of every thrifty and industrious man
who desires to protect his family against his
death.
To ascertain this safe rate, they added to the
actual death cost experienced by the old line
companies an ample reserve, and then a reasonable
amount for expenses and profits, but
so limited as to compel economical management.
So plain and fair and popular are its
methods that over three millions of business
was done in the first eight months work. Its
rates are fixed, and must be paid, deaths or 110
deaths, but are divided into two, four, or six
payments a year, as may best suit the convenience
of the applicant.
Active Agents wanted in South Carolina.
For further particulars, call or send address
to JAS. D. PICKARD, Manager,
Columbia, S. C.
January 12 2 tf
C. & I. NARROW GAUGE RAILROAD
SCHEDULE of Mail and Passenger Trains
from Lepoir, N. C., to Chester, S. C.,taking
effect at8 o'clock, A. M. Sunday, May 29, 1887: .
GOING SOUTH.
Leave Lenoir 8.00 A. M.
Leave at Hickory 9.03 A. M.
Leave Newton 9.36 A. M.
Arrive at Lincolnton, 10.30 A. M.
Leave Lincolnton 10.35 A. M.
Arrive at Dallas 11.33 A. M.
Arrive at Gastonia, 11.48 A. M.
Leave Gastonia.... 11.50 A. M.
Arrive at Clover, 12.28 P. M.
Arrive at Yorkville, 12.58 P. M.
Leaye Yorkville, 1.00 P. M.
Arrive at Guthriesville, 1.25 P. M.
Arrive at Lowrysville, 1.50 P. M.
Arrive at Chester 2.15 P. M.
GOING NORTH.
Leave Chester, 4.30 P. M.
Arrive at Lowrysville, 4.57 P. M.
Arrive at Guthriesville, 5.26 P. M.
Arrive at Yorkville, 5.47 P. M.
Leave Yorkville.., 5.50 P. M.
Arrive at Clover,..; 6.20 P. M.
Arrive at Gastonia, 7.00 P. M.
Leave Gastonia, 7.15 P. M.
Arrive at Dallas, 7.30 P. M.
Arrive at Lincolnton, 8.18 P. M.
Arrive at Newton 9.11 P. M.
Arrive at Hickory, 9.44 P. M.
Arrive at Lenoir,*. 10.50 P. M.
G. R. TALCOTT, Superintendent.
Junel 22 tf
1887. WEST LIBERTY STREET71887~
Yorkville Livery and Feed Stables
ARE still on a boom, and the year 1887 finds
me with some of the finest Vehicles ever
shown in the Livery business in Yorkville, and
surpassed by none. Everything will be kept
in the best style. Give me a trial and be convinced.
Cincinnati and Columbus Buggies
Of every description will be kept. Spring
Wagons, Phaetons, <fcc., of the best make, always
on hand.
FOR FUNERALS
I have a fine Queen City Hearse and a Clarence
Coach, which will be sent to any part of the
county at short notice. Terms reasonable.
A Big Bargain.
I have a Jumpseat Phaeton and some Buggies
on hand that I will give a big bargain in,
if sold soon to make room for my new stock.
HAVE YOUR HORSES FED
At the Yorkville Livery and Feed Stables
where they will receive the best attention.
F. E. SMITH.
October 13 41 tf
Bradfield's
Female Regulator.
THIS famous remedy most happily meets the
demand oftheagefor woman's peculiar and
multiform aillictions. It is a remedy for WOMAN
ONLY, and for one SPECIAL CLASS of
her diseases. It is a specific for certain diseased
conditions of the womb, and proposes to so
control the Menstrual Functionas to regulate
all the derangements and irregularities of her
Monthly Sickness. The proprietors claim for
this remedy no other medical property.
BRADFIELD'S FEMALE REGULATOR
Is strictly a "Vegetable Compound, and is the
studied prescription of a most learned physician
whose specialty was WOMAN, and whose
fame became enviable and boundless because
of his wonderful success in the treatment and
cure of female complaints. Suffering woman, <
it will relievo you of nearly all the complaints
peculiar to your sex.
For sale by druggists. Write for book on
Female Diseases to
BRADFIELD REGULATOR CO.,
Atlanta, Ga.
August 11 32 ly
ib* (Smquiw.
TKKMS OF SUBSCRIPTION:
Single copy for one year, ? 2 50
1 UK
For three months, 7 ft
Two copies one year 4 00
Ten copies one year 20 00
And an extra copy for a club of ten.
How to Order the Enquirer.?Write
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county, who receive the paper at post-offices
within the county; and to all other subscribers
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are not liable for postage^ it being prepaid
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