Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page. It is also available as plain text as well as XML.

^ ^_^_^_ jffi';' " _^___ - . TWO DOLLARS 1>ER ANNUM. GOD AND OUR^ COUNTRY. ALWAYS IN ADVANCE. V ^_? _ *\_._ _ j ?' C I VOLUME 8. SATURDAY MORNINGj OCTOBER IT, 1874. ., NUMBER 37 II ones! y and Economy in tho Management of the State Govern ment. The conservative- citizens of South Carolina profos to be in favor of hon esty nnd economy in the mnnagcnietic of the Stntc nnd count}' governments, and ?Iro profess to be willing to join hands with nuy party which give* any ovi deuce of its ability to brinir this desired state of Ml airs about. The Republican party has had control of the State dur ing the past, six years, and during that time many wiongs havo been imposed upon the people through tho tunchiiia tions and uuholy combinations of bad !?nd irresponsible men. The party re cogniv:iog the above fact ha< m:tde t 'despernto effort to relievo itself ofthc Jpad ' which has been pressing upon it. and to a very great extent Iv s succeed cd in accomplishing the ubjet sought. It has honestly striven to bring about a better stato of things, by selecting in tclligcnt, cotnpetcut, honest men t ? ad minuter public affairs, thereby throw ing around the public offices tlvtt sccur afy which is ueccssary to perpetuate Republican institutions iu buh the Stato and nation. It is perfoctly tiitur al lor parties to select their staul ird bearers from their own rattles,ani wc have jet to learn the time when tho .Democracy, while in the majority, ovjt stepped outside of its own party lines to ?cleet a candidate for an important office, and yet that is just what the Democrats seem to expect us to do hcrj. We desire honesty and economy in th management ol the Stato kovernnieir, Just ns siucerdy as docs the tVeiot awl Courier, or any other Rourbou Dem j ?erat in this State, but wo bogt.? be ox cuped from believing that the Demo cratic way for bringing that state of affairs ubout is aiay better than our own. Rut leaving the question ot'pirtv is*ucs aside, we desire to ask any candid, intelligent man in Sou h 0 no lina what it is in t c record ufJudg? Crecn that iuduecs them to believe hi; in a better man for tho position, an I will conduct n more honest or economist; feminent for this State than wmiid , ( hnmborlair: 'f Ifc is all wj-y^yoR assert that Green is a better m m and more honest than (ihamh-irlniu. but what evidence b-'vy wo, or ait . jnnu, that he will make i uitiro acco.it ?able Governor or will secure to th ? pt-nplo a mere honest and conn t n c 11 administration ol public affairs '* Can we judge of the future by his r.:c?r 1 in 1hfi pattf Not at nil, for hu Im n > executive record whatever, and n i 01 ? Iknovts whether he will be ho'ij<t, or will, even, excel in trickery and c irrilp ttion the worst man'that his pir.ioou>.a I ?Fouth Carolina since recoiHtriiotioa TYe havo bis word fur his honesty, and that is all So have we Mr. Clumber Iain's word that ho will give th; pc ipte ?oi' South Carolina an boucst ooouomiexl government, nud wo undertake, to say that no honest man in this State, be he Democrat or Republijan, who know* Mr. Chamberlain personally, b'jtwill take his word for the deed, as quink as ho would that of Judge Green ?Wo havo already ?h?ren, in n former article, that if tho candidate* are to b-> judged by their ?'surroundings," then Judge Green will be sunk so low that the hand of political resurrection can riever reach him. Nearly every one of his prominent supporters is u mm of exceedingly questionable reputati hi, and most of them have been cxcrescnccs upon the Republican party until they ?could no longer be tolerated, and when 4bey Bee the power whioh tl cy hive hitherto held slowly but surely slipping from their grasp, forthwith thoy iu ike a desperate attempt 'to retrieve their waning fortunes by assuming the role of reformers?by sboutiug lustily, "Stop thief I" Btuy thief!' when thoy are the very ones whom tho party his tried for years to rid itself of. Wo ask any honorable Conservative, how in i the name of nil that is decent ..and rcf pectable, be can rally to tlio*ftup ?port of a man who bus for his right band* men suoh persons as R. II. Cain, James. ATBowloy, William A. Hay no. ?Georgetown Jones aud Thomas C. Dunu, the great bond investigator, but a man of exceedingly short moiuory / Do tho Conservatives of this Slate be Jievc it would bo possible to have ao honest, economical government with such, men as advisers to tho chief exeou live of the State, and do they believe ths&such men would add anything to the dignity nnd respectability of the eundidate who could be elected through their-\ instrumentality '( We think not. We ?^vc the Conservatives crodit for moro VBDBO than that state of affairs would Imply. Whilo we do not doubt ibr one' moment that every thoughtful Conservative in tho Stato desires honest, economical government, yet wo must be permitted' to bullovu that they do not think such things can be brought about by Judge Green, with ouch a gang of ?hark? at his baok as are now draining the Censervativo purjo. Mr. Chamborlain has pledged bis cord f add- his sacred honor to stand by the pledges'which he has already tnado to the party whioh placed hiai in nomi notion, und ovcry honest mm in tho State, and out of it, who kuo.vs Itim, knows that he tneaua to do just what he says. Mr. Chamberlain never permits himscll to get into a condition where he does not know just what responsibilitio s are reefing upon him, and just whit is expected nt his hands at all time.*; but this is vastly tuoro than oui bo h;iid of Judge Green. A man who lends an coonomieal private lite, would bo much more likely to look carefully after th j aff.iirs of the State than one who yields to his appetite and becomes the slave of a passion which ho cannot control. That Judge tjreen is a prey to his pas sums is patent to every ouo wh i knows the man intimately, und yet therj are intelligent men who prefer to entrust the destinies of a great State to the keeping of'one who cannot ooatrol hint self, to one who is clear headed, sane and sober at all times. \ c need It m^d'.y and economy in the managem nt of the State government, but wo ask to b$ ex emed from believing tint sueda stat e of things can bo brought ab l?t through Jadgo Green and his mot I sy an 1 ques tionuble "s trrouudinga."?Columbia Union. "Cut-few ?mt Not Bins To-Night.'' [In the timo of Cromwell, a young soldier, for ro no offeuec, wa* condemned to di'*, and the time of his death was fixed "at tho ringing of the curlew " Naturally, such a doo-n wmhl be fear ful and bitter to otic in tho yoarfl of his hope and pride, hut to this unhappy yo tth death was doubiy tc trrible, since he was soon to have b *cn married to a beautiful young lady whom he had hng loved. The lady, who loved him ardent ly in return, had used her utmost effort* to avert his fntn, pleading with tho judge*, and even with Cromwell himself, but nil in vain. In her despair she tried to bribe the old sexton not to riu2 the bell, but she found that iiiipn.sdble The hour drew noar for tho execution. Tim preparations were completed. The oflieor.? of the lav brought forth tho prisoner, and wait.-d whilSjthc sur? was ^o*tiu?. for the. signal fronpfche dtvaut licliTWer. To the ?.Votilir nhoywy<W body, it did n >t rtn* ! Only one hum in being at that mouicutkuew the reis hi. The poor girl, hilf wil I with the thought of her lover's peril, h id rush s>l, unseen, up the win ling stiiH. au 1 climbed th .1 ladder int? th.* bdfry-l?'t and ?e zed the totig-ieof the bell. The ? II sexton was in hi* pUoo, prompt t? tho fatal in one it Ho threw hU'Wfiiht ii| en (be rope, nnd tho bell, obedient to his practiced hand, r-cled mil swunrto and fro in the tower. Hut the brave girl k< pt her hold, and no sound issiie I turn its mctolie lips. Again and again the sexton drew the rope, but with desj crate strength the young heroine held on. Every niuveiucnt made her position more fearful; every sway of the bell's huge weight, threatcnel to fling he- through tho high tower window; but she would not let go. At lust the sexton went away. Old an I do if, he had not noticed that the curfew ijavo no peal. The brave girl deucend -d from the helfrv, wounded and trembling She hurried from the church to the place of execution. Cromwell himself was there, nnd was just sending to do maud why the bell was silent ] Slowly England's sun was setting, o'er th: hill-tops far away. Pilling all tho land with beauty, at theclos'* of one sail day, And I he last rays kissed the forehead of a man and maiden fair He with footstepi slow and weary, aha with sunny floating hair; Ho with bowed head, sad and thoughtful, she with lips ull cold and white, Struggled to keep back fho murmur? "Curfew must not ring to night." ?'Sexton," Uessie's white lips faltered, pointing to tho prison old. With its turrets tall and gloomy, with its walls (lark, damp nnd cold, "I've a lover in that prison, doomed this very night to die, At the ringing of the curfew, nnd no earthly help is nigh; Cromwell will not come till sun-net," and her lips grew strangely while An sire breathed the husky whisper? "Curfow must not ring to-nighf" "Bessie," calmly spoke ttio sexton, cvory word pierced her young heart, Like the piercing of an arrow, like a deadly poisoned dart, "Long, long years I've rung tho curfew from that gloomy, shadowed towor; Every eveniug, just at sunset, it has told the twilight hour; I have don? my duty ever, tried to do it just and right, Now I'm old I still must do it, Curfew it must riug to night." Wild her eycB and pale her features, stern and whito her thoughtful brow, And wilhin-her secret bosom Bessie made a Bolemn vow, She hnd listened while tho judges read without a tear or Bigh, "At the ringing of tho curfew, Basil Underwood must die." And her bveuth came fast and faster, and her eyes grow largo and bright? In an undertone she murmured? "Curfew atut not ring to-night." She with quick steps bounded forward, sprung within tho old ohureh door, Left the old man threading slowly paths so eft he'd trod before; Not ono moment paused tho maiden, but] w ith eye und check aglow, Mounted up the gloomy ' .wer, whore tho bell swung to und fro: .And she climbed the dusty ladder, on which fell no ray of light, Up and up?her white lips saying, '?Curfew shnll not ring to-night." r-hc had reached tho topmost ladder, o'er her hangs the great dark bell; Awful is the gloom beneath her, like a pathway down to hell. Lo ! the ponderous tongue is swinging, 'tis tho hour ? !" curfew now, And the sight has chilled her bosom, stopped her breath and paled her brow ? Shall'she let it ring ? No. never 1 Flash her eyes with sudden light, And she springs anil groBps it firmly? "Curfew shall not ring to-night." Out she swung, far out, tho city scomo 1 a epeck of light below, !Twixt Heaven and earth her form suspende cd. as the bell swung to nr.d fro, And the sexton nt the bell-rope, old nnd deaf, heard not the bell, But ho thought it still was ringing fair young Hasil's funeral knell. Still tho maiden clung most firmly, nnd with trembling lips and white, Said to hush her heart's wild beating, "Curfew Hhall not ring to night." It was o'er, the boll ceased swaying, nnd the maiden slopped once more Firmly on the dark old ladder, whore for hundred years before, Human foot had not been p'anted. The brave deed that she had done Shou'd be told long ages after, as the rays of setting sun, Should illume tho sky with beauty; aged s res with heads of white, Lou- should tell the little chilren. Curfew did not ring that night. O'er the distant hills camo Cromwell; Bessie sees him; and her brow, Full of hope and full of gladness, has no anxious traces now. At bis loot she tells her story, shows her bands all bruised and torn: And her face so sweet an 1 pleuding, yet with sorrow pale and worn, Touched his heart with sudden pity, lit his eyes with misty light: "Go ! your lover lives," said Cromwell, "Curlew bIiuII not ring to-night." Naming the Baby. Smudge httd ransacked the various bookn (or a name, and as the sixth of the latest edition of Smudge was in dicative of tort m the rantc?f?f men, as the infant looked strong?almost War like?a great mime was the qucBt of its distracted parents. Mrs S. wanted it named after some old Bible character. Smudge suggested Sampson Ooliah, which would typify strength ; Mrs. S. leaned lo Moses Samuel, emblematical of weakness. Smudge declared that ho would rather expose the child to the measles than have it called Moses Samuel. Tlun be hinted at Jonah; but Mrs S. would listen to no such monogram. She duln't want her hist child's name con nected with a fish story ! Already they had named a child Hainan, nnd she was sure bo would be hanged some day. Set ing that no Scriptural name could be agreed on, she suggested Omega," reminding Smudge that, they had named their Grst born Alpha. "You di n't call this one Omega, said Smudge, "I'll put the name away, nnd when we want it I'll let you know. How would Martin Luther do V* "I'm a Baptist, I nmSnudgc!" retorted Mrs. S, coloring. "I don't want any Lutheran names in this bouse. For your mother's sake, I nllowcd one of my children to be called John Wesley. She don't poke nny Method ist mimes nn to me again. If Luther had been a Baptist, the name might do. There's Hoger Williams. Hoger Wil liams Smudge would sound well ! He could write it H. Williams Smudge.you see." "Hut he never will !" cried tho pir ent, with determination. "Hoger Wil liams was a Baptist, and you know Mrs. Smudge, th.v, I don't lean that way. I'd sooner call him Tom Paine." Mrs. Smudge shrieked. "Call him Tom Paine, nnd I'll kill him before he's weaned." "Von like Puritans, Mrs. Smudge Call him Miles Stiindiah," "No, sir ! 1 don't want my child to grow up with nny such outlandish name. You called our second boy Ply mouth Hock Smudge, and that name will kill him bolore be votes. No more 1'uritan names." "You're the confoundest. particular woman L over saw," retorted Smudge. "If it had been a girl, wo would have culled her Cleopatra Octavia." "No, we wouldn't! Our fourth girl n w groans under the name of Olympia Tarpcia. It will mako her be au old maid. J et's compromise Smudge. You like a strong name?Golinh, for instance I, u Baptist one. Let's call the baby Roger W. Goliah Smudge." ''Put tho Biblo name first." "I won t do it." "Then we'll call him something else." "My father's name was Joshua Gideon/' meekly suggested Mrs. Smudge. " W hat do I care if it was ? Nono or my children shall bo called after any of your relatives. That's settled I Lot us lall baok on a late name?Garabaldi, lor instance." "Or Bonaparte " "WbtqJ ono?" "Napoleon tho Third." "No; T won't have him called Napoleon." "Theb^you shan't call him Gari baldi," rfctorteJ Mrs. S.as firmly. "Smud;re, you are the trickiest individual I ever lived with. You won't li?^a to anything. 1 am reason- i alle?willing to listen to anything you propose," '?Then,,'- call the boy Daniel Webster. I always admired the old statesrnnn." "Our family shan't be disgraced by a Whig name," said Mrs. Smudge. "Lafayette is a great and good name " Smudge thought fo; he was on the eve of suggesting the name of the great Frenchivao himself. "Lafayette Williams!" said Mrs. Smudge. "There's your old Baptist name again !" . I tell you Hoger >'? illiams shan't, in any form, hang to that boy's coat-tail." "Tho* you shan't call him Lafay ette" ? And,; thus the quarreling over the christening continued for six mortal hours. Finally, the affair was settled. Smudge's twelfth baby is to face the world - with the siuiplo coguomou of Joltu Smudge. The Southern Planter. There must nnd will be, a radical change iu tho conduct of tho rising gon oration of planters. The younger nun are, I think convinced that it is a mis take to.dopcnd on Western ?and North crn markets lor tho articles of daily cm-umption, and forncirly J everything which goes to cuke life tolerable. Hut tho elders, grounded by a lifetittio of habit in tho methods which sorve?4 thcin well under a slave regime, but which ruinous now a days, will uevcr correct themselves. ' They will coutinno to bo wail tho unfortunate f.ito to which they think themselves condotnncl?or will rest assured that they can do very well it? th Jprosont chiotic coudt"\io:i ofthing nrotfjfcfr^"',ovidouco does not allow -^??MN^'Sin i ?iiL_They .cannot bo brought to see that their "ouly safety lies in making co ton their surplu* or ip; that they must absolutely dij thjir sus tenancj, as well us their richo*, o it of tho ground Before the war, a plant ir whoo.vncda plantttion of two thous tu 1 acres, and two hundrel n >gro u upon i', would, when ho cams to m?ke his January -cttleme t with his mer chant iu town, iuvest whatever there was to his crcditin more laud and more negroes. Now the more laud he buys the w?>rse be is otF, becnusc*h,> tinds it very hard to get it workel up to tho old standard, and unless he docs, he can ill utTord to buy supplies from tho outer world at tho heavy ^prices charged for them?or if be can do that, he can ac cotnplish little else. As most of bis capital was taken from him by tho se rics of events which liberated his slaves he has been compelled since the war to undertake his planting operations on borrowad capital, or, iu other words, has rclii'd on a merchant or middle mail to furnish fo >d and clothing for his lab > rurs, and all the uuans uecessiry to g >t his crop, baled and weigho 1, to tlu t mar ket. The failure of his enva wmld of couise cover him with liabilities; but such has been ^his fatal persistence in this false syste n that ho h is bee i abb* to struggle through as iu Abib.imi, thrco successive crop \ failures. The morchant, somewhat reconciled to the anomalous condition of affairs by the I lar^e profits ho can make on coarse ' goods brought long distance, has him self pushed (endurance and courage to au extreme point, and when he dare give ondit no longer, hosts oi planters aro often placed in tho most painful an 1 embarrassing positions. So they g alter up the wrecks of their fortune, p:wk their hares Penates is an emigrant wa gon or ear, and doggedly work their way to Texas.?Edward Kinj ia^Scrib ncr'sfur October. Bottled Hash. Where is (Primus) Croon? We hear his silvery voico no more. Positive Dunn, comparative I) urudest superlative Dunn-gone U. S. Dispensatory.?Dandolion root, good for tho liver complaint; also, good lor greens. I hey ring him together with a cow bell iu Wuihulia, and he marches dowu in a squad (of one.) The difference between a bolter and a bottle?ono is smashed when dore with, and tho other douo with when smashed. Should sea captains always go to the Leo ward '( Au Hades decamp?Getting away with a good sized pay certificate. 'Daro you beat the State ticket ? To disgrace wo'ro not wedded ; Aod we'll go 'double headed.' Just to beat that Stato ticket.' ' [O'Reilly.? Columbia Criion Ludicrous Scene in a Pulpit A German paper relates the following anecdote. In a Bavarian town of tho most pro nouueed orthodoxy, the priest preached lately against the Old Catholics, andere lated such horrible things about them that his pious hearers were literally hor ror .stricken at Old Catholic impropietics At last the preacher cried out: 'I he Old Catholics Juro so vilo that they will all be cast into the pit, and if what I tell you is not true, may tho devil take me now on the spot 1' His excitement was so terrible, and he so struck the cushion that the book fell from it. Not far from the pulpit there sat an American, who had a ne gro servant with him, to whom he beck oued to t?te tho book up to the priest, who, perhaps, had never seen one of those sons of ham in his lifo. The ne gr ? at once obeyed, and as ho mounted the lowest ol the pulpit steps, the cler gynian repeated his wish that the ' devil might come and take him if what he bad said against the Old Catholics was not true. Although the negro went softly the preacher heard his footsteps, and turning round saw a black object sol eninly, steadily and surely approaching him, He looked nt him with terror, and believing that ho would tho next instant be collared by his Santanio Ma jesty* he cried out with a trembling voice. 'It is, after all, possiblo that there may be good people among the Old Catholics.' Turning then round to sec if the ob jeet had disappeared, ho saw it still stua diiy approaching. The perspiration burst out on his brow, and full of des pair be called out. 'There arc even many good people among the Old Catholics !' Thinking that this would suffice, ho turned round, but what was his horror to lind the object cioso at hand. Iinng iuing himself in the very grasp of Bel zebub, turning partly to the negro and partly to the congregation, he cried out j 'May the devil come an tike me if all the Old Catholics are not better than we aro !' The terrified preacher fainted firxxa fright nnd it w-j: only after some time that he recovered.?A7". Y. 7f?W* A Leaf from the Record. In the legislature of South Carolina, immediately after the war, Jutlgd John T. Green represented in part the coun ty of Suuiter. It was thut Legislature which passed the in'a nous 'Biaek Co lo and Green was one of its^warmcst sup porters We find on page 78 of the journals, the following amendment of ferred by Green, but rcjoeted by the House; Add to section 40. "And in caso the servant shrill ftbsent'himself without leavo from the service of the master during the continuance of the contract,~tho master or his agent is hereby |ntithorized and ompow ered to arreu him wherevor ho may be found nn I compel him to return to his cm p'oymenl." A beautiful idea offfrce government this is, and the man who gave exprcs sion to it now seek support fro n the very men whom he sought by all means in bis uower to re enslave. Even Green's Dcu ocratic allies refused to swallow this amendment, and it was voted dawn by 03 to 42, Green standing closely oy bis infamous progeny. It mattere I not how inhumanly and brutally a servant might be treated by his employer, if he dared leave before his contract expire 1, he could be arrested and compelled t j go back to his chains as complete a slave as before the shackles were strick en from his limbs by a just government Is this the kind of a man to entrust with the high olfiue of Govern >r of this State ? Senator T. C. Dunn is the recognized leader of the bolters' movement in favor of "honest government and against the 'Bond Hing.'" Have tho people forgotten the position taken by Senator Dunn last winter in regard to the Blue Kidgc scrip and the Conversion Bouds? Was he not the champion of both these repudiated obligations, nnd did he not use till his influence to upset the settle ment bill after it passed and became a law, because these matters were unpro vided for ? Did ho not champion Mr. Wesley's little claim of an hundred thousand dollars or more, nud for what purpose? Mr. WesLy was a large holder of scrip, nnd one of tho agents of tho''Bond Hing" in New York. Thero are ^ood reasons for believing that Senator Dunn is acting in the interests of that ' Bond Ring," and that his opposition to Mr. Chamberlain arises from the fact that tho latter unutter ably opposed to any bond scheme what ever. Did not Senator Dunn, or his committee, sccu o a pay cortifioatc for ?2,500 last winter, to pay tho cxpenst i of tho investigation of tho bonds, ana did ho not in uddition to that amount, receive $700 from the Attorney-General for tho tamo purpose ? Wo are credibly informed that he did.? Columbia Union. Diphtheria. ^?? Tho following are said to be {effectual remedies for diphtcria, or sore throat Garglo or wash the inside of {tho throat frequently with a tea spoonful of tine turo of back cobosh, diluted with a Ht tic water. Commence using it on the first symtoms of soreness or ioflarama tion. It docs not burn or cauterize but soothes and relieves tho irration Do not swallow, as it j will nauseate, Continue the use once in two hours until relieved ? In a clinical leoturo by M. Buequoy, do livercd at the Hospital Cochin, Paris bo expressed his preference for lease juice, as a local application ladiptheria to acids, "chlorate of potash, nitrate of silver, porehlorido of iron, alum oc limo water. lie uses it by dipping a little plug of cotton or wool, twisted around 1 wire in the juco and, pressing it against the deceased surfuoe four or five time*, dnily. For a grown person four drops of sulphurio acid diluted in three quar tcrs of a tumbler of water; with a festal Ier doso *for children. The effect of this treatmrot was said to be instantano ousj tho acid at once destroying tho parastcs and the patient coughing up tho obstruction. ChtldronJiloioSt pre viously in a dying strta,ywero declared; to be playing about within ton minutes; and at n moderate computation 80180 forty or fifty of these suJ-ioa recoveries have been placed on record with fall particulars. U The Vagabond Sage. An old man of very active phiaiogno* my. answering to the name of Jacob Wilmot, was brought to the police court Iiis clothes looked as if they might have, been bought second hand in his youth ful prime, for they had suffered mar*" from the rub of the world than the pre*, pricotr himself! 'What business?' ?None; I'm a traveler.' fA vagabond, perhaps.' 1 You are not far wrong. Travelers and vagabonds are about tho sa mo thing The difference is that th e latter travels without money and the former withoai brains.' ,Where have you traveled V ?All over tho Continent.' ?For what purpose ?' ?Observation.' 'What have you observe"! 1* 'A little to commend, much to eao* sure, and a great deal to laugh at/ ?What do you like?' 'A handsome woman that will stay at home, an eloqueut preacher who will preach short sermons, a good, write? to much, and a fool that hai sense enough to hold his tongue.' ?What do you censure ?' ?A man that marries a girl^for her money and fine clothing, a youth whet studies medicine while ho has the tue of bis hands, and tho people who will elect a drunkard to office. ?What do you laugh at?' ?I laugh at a man who expects hie position to command that respect whioh bis personal qualifications and quali ties do not merit.' He v. as dismissed. ?He handled his gun carolessly, and put on his angel plutntge,' is the Utttt Western obi-uary notice. As appropriate to tho season, a Tob do woman muzzled hor husband .to keep him from kissing the chant bet maid. Why should there be more marriage* in winter than iu summer? Because iu winter tho gentlemen ro.juiro e*a lorters and tho ladict muffs. ?Sec,' "said a sorrowing wife' how peaceful the oat Jaod dog are/ 'Yes/ Haid tho pctulent husband, 'but ju?t tie them together and see how the fur Jwtll fly. When you see a young man with % yellow vest, with a girl |hanging ou hit arm, walk up to a candy stand and rock I ossly call for 'some gum drops aud h hull stick of lickrish,' you may mark him a*' a candidate for the poor house. This is old but good. Two yonng princes of Austria entered into a vio lent quarrol, whoa "ono of them said,: ?you are tho {greatest ass in Vionna/ Just then tho Emperor, their father, em torcd and said (indignantly. 'Come young gentlemen, you forget that I am present. A Yankee poet thus breaks forth : Oh ! the snore, the beautiful snore, fill* ing the chamber from ceiling to floor t Over tho coverlet, under tho sheet, fret* her wco dimpled chin to her pre?y feetj . Now riaing aloft liko a boo in J une; now fluto-liko subsiding, then rising'egaut, is the beautiful snoro of Ehiebetb/ Jane." After tho prosecuting attorney hit' heaped vituperation upon the poor prie ouer without counsel, tho judge asked bim if he had anything to say lot hit* self. ?Your hoaor,' replied the prisonor ?I ask for a postponement for 18 days, in order that I may find a blackgWaW' to answer that onojthoro/