Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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_ * __ _^^^_? ,:l,_^^^^_^ _ ,. two doll a us per annum. J> GOD A.TST jO OTJ }l COUNTRY. always in advance, y Ht?LiSeI."~~~ saturday morning?? uptm ebhr 1% 18x1 ~ ^ number 33 Coroner's Inquest on the Body jof Jnmcs W. Browning. iiA h . i ? .????..?<..? held at bamberg on sunday, 3ut1i august, 1874, by oliver dewktt, trial justice, acting AS coroner. Information having been la'ul in this case by F M Bamberg, a lawful jury of inquest whs duly summoned, composed of the following persons, to wit : 11 J Brabham, foromau, lion. James Smith, G Y Patrick, W F Patrick, J S B Jones, J F Jones, VV W Smoke, S T Fniiy, Ilcnry Smith, Andy Hamilton, Jack Jenkius, G A ltiee and Jerry Thomas. Tho jury having viewed tho body, ..then lying iu a room of B F Slater's store house, and a post mortem, ul tho body having beeu made by Dr. J F Boggot in the presence of the jury, the following evidence was taken : Dr. J F Bnggot sworn : Have made post mortem examination' of the body of James TV Browning, and am of opinion that the said James W Browning came to his death from a pistol shot wound, tho ball entering the right breast, near tho right nipple, ranging through the -' lower lobe of the right lung (Signed) J F Bacgot." William L Oonnelley sworn : 1 do not fcnow anything of the shooting of James W Browning; was at Murphy's store, and heard the shooting. (Signed) W.L CoNNELLEY. Brooks F Slater sworn : On Satur day evening, 29th August, 1874, after ?supper, James W Browning came into my store, come behind the counter, and asked me for a pistol; 1 asked him what ho wanted with it; he said that J W Crum bad threatened to shoot him; I ,gave him a pistol, a nuall seven shooter, and I went with him; we walked from ?nry storo up towards Dixou's store, ?going towards and along the rail oad platform; when wo had passed a mul berry tree, near Dixou's, Mr. Crum =ppokc. lie (Crum) was standing right, by tho trc.e. Mr. Browning had pa sod the tree. Crum asked, ''Who is that'( Mr. Browning replied "it was him,"" and. turned around; 1 saw a flatdi from u . pistol in the baud of Gl um; 1- reeogn i: Mr. Crum from the light of the flash of the pistol; previously I did u >t r-.-co^ ttiro Mr. Crum's person, only by his Yoice; Crum was about lour feet from Mr. Browniug when he fired; alter Mr "Crum fired, Mr Browuiug eith r struck *Crum or pushed hi in; Crum foil, with Mr. Browning on top of him. Mr. Browning said as?oon as he was shot, ""fie has killed me." I told him [ d d toot think he was hurt; a sccoti 1 shot was fired when M r. Browning was < n Crum; I do not know who tired tho ?Ebot; after the second shot, and while Mr. Browtiitig was on too of Crum, 1 beard a pistol cocked; I got down on my ?knees, aud took a pi.-tol out of Crum's ?hand; it was cocked when I took it out toFhis (Crum's) band. The pistol 1 niw produce is the one 1 took out of Mr. Crutn'a hand; Mr. Browning was not on "Crum over a half minute?a very short time; Mr. Browning got oil' Crum of his own accord aud started for my store; on cnteriug the store, Mr. Browning re pcatcd that 'rlt'e was killed" more than once; 1 told him "1 did not think he was." Ho went iuto tho back room and 'sat on tho floor; I got him on the be i; just as I bad got him on the bed, aud Went back to the door, two other shots were fired sonio distuueo in frout of tho ??office; it was very dark during the time ?of tho fracas; Crum was in the shad >w of tbo tree. All of this happened in the town of Bamberg on Saturday uven ing, August 29, A. D. 1S74, between the hours of 8 aud 9 i\ M., I think Mr. Browning died about five minutes after he entered the store; I sent tor Dr. Baggot and he got there just as Mr. Browning was dying. (Signed) B F Slater. Edward F Slater sworn : At Bamberg on Saturday evening, August 129, 1874, about 8} o'clock r. si., I came down from F M Banibcrg's; I came to a "pride of India" tree stauditig opposite to Crum's store; I heard Crum s ty some thing about Mr. Fairy and John Smith's fight; I heard him call both Dames; Crum said ,lit was not so;" Mr. Browu ing was present and asked if ho meant that for him; Crum replied "that he could take it to himself;" Crum got. up; Mr. Browning was sitting on tho bench in Crum's piazza; Mr. Hrowuiug had a ehair in irout of him, and when Crum rose he picked up the ehair and pushed him (Crurc) down with it; he (Crum) apparently fell back against tho wall; Mr. Browning rau out of tho piazza of Mr. Crum's storo arouud tho corner of Hartzog's storo; as Crum got up Air. Browniug was running aiound tho cor ner, as above stated; Mr. Crum said: "I'll bo d?d if 1 don't kill Browning," be (Crutu) went into bia store; J P Murphy was standing outsido of Crum's store; Murphy said tolttm, "Dou't you go down there, Crum," Murphy had reference to Crum's going down to Frank Slater's Btoro; Crum said,"I am going down there to see the gentleman;" bo alee said, "I'll be d~d if I dou't kill liinij" Murphy endonvorcd to kocp hi in from going; Crum started towards Frank Slator'b store bareheaded, nnd wont in the street towards Sluter's, close to Isaao Liobmun's piazza; I started bo hind hiiu; I saw Mr. Drowning come out of B F Slater's store; Slater was with him; they came towards Liebman'a store; Crum, as he got opposite- tho mul berry tree by Dilau's shop, stoppe 1; hj got behind tho mulberry tree; I stop pa I within about fii'tccu feet of him; as Mr. Browning got pretty close, [ wontabiut six feet, where t'ruiu was standing; when Mr. Browning got about four feet from himj Crum said, "Is that you. Browning?" Mr. Browning replied. ??This is mo." Ah soon as Crum said the words, he threw the pistol ri<:lit against Mr. Browningand Bred; Crum had tho pistol in his right hand; ho put, the pistol to Mr. Browuiug's breast and shot hi in; us soon as Crum shot Mr. Browning struck him and knocked him (Crum) dowu, Mr. Browning exclaim iing that "ho w.is shot " I said to Frank Slater, "I am d?1 if Ian goingt) stand this;" I started towards Crum an I Browning; Frank Slater ran in bitweo i me and Crum and Browning; Frank gut on his knees, and npprirod to g'.'t h >ld ol one of the combatants; I wont to ?^o around Frank, but hojuuipol up and got between the combatants an I uiysnf, Mr. Browning got up nni slappcl his hands on his breast and said, "I am killed;" Crum juinpel upanlstirt.il offj and got ubout thirty fcjt; [ stirtcd oh towards Frank Slater's storo with Mr. Browning; I wheeled and ran after Crum, and said I was n it going to 1 t him get away Ab >ut that time Mr. Browning and Frank Slater got on tho stoie steps; I was ab >ut forty fo't from thorn; Mr. Browuiug said, *? I am g dug to fall;" I went hick to them, an I went to tho room with Mr. Browning au 1 Frank Slater; Mr. Browuiu j.wout to got on the bed in the room, but foil on the. side of the bod. L said, ''Frank, put him on the bod I'll git tin dmtir.'" I ran out and. sent two culoro 1 in m to go afrpr tho d ejt ?r I aslw 1 three, or fo ir col irud men stuudiig outside thu d > ?r to help mi catch him. I se it one of them to toll F M Hamburg that Mr Crum hal shot Mr. Browning. [ was not.present when Mr. Browning died. (Signed) .-13 FrSLATEU Willinm J Jones sworn : Am a re-i d'eut of tho town of B iniborg. On Saturday ovouiiig, 29.h August, 1371, alter supper, boiwccn S and ? o clock, I left home and went to Fran's Slater's .store; I left his storo au J went t > Mr Gruln's'store; whoa I got there L luird J P .Murphy trying to quiet Crum. lie told him "not to hive any fim. u ?t to do that " Ho apparently was trying t) pacify Crum. My curiosity was excited; I looked and saw Crum have h pistol tu his hand; d um walked out of his storo; Murphy said, "I can do nothing with you," and Murphy left; Crum started towards Frank Slater's storo; ho walke 1 a little below Mr. Dixon's shop, and said, "Is that you, Browning/?.''Mr. Brown'ng replied, "This is iue,"o words to th it effect; on thu reply, iMr Crum lired; Mr. Browuiug, I think, fell to his knees and rose, und L think struck Crum. who fell with Mr. Browuiug ou lop of him; Mr. Browning exclaimed, "11c h is killed mo," or words to th it effect; Cruin got up and left. About twenty stops Irovi where the fuss dour red, and iu the direction that (/rum went, two pistol ?hots were lired, but I do not know who lirol them; I heard only one shut lired whou Crum und Mr. Browning got together; am positive of that; whou Mr. Browning wont in the room he asked me to pull off his Eh oos and to piit so nothing under his h :a 1; I searched for a pistol; Mr. Browuiug did nqt have one thon; I bv.V Frank slater at tho shooting; \V II Green was noir mc at tho tiurS of tho shooting; both of us loft the storo of Crum together, when Crum and Murphy wcro talking at tho storo, from their conversation 1 was made uwaro that Mr Browning was the man meant, by Crum, and whom ho was angry with. (Signed) W J Jones'. State of South Carolina, Baun well County. Au inquisition indented, taken at Bamberg aforesaid, the thirtieth day of August, A. i). eighteen hundred aud scvcuty-lour, before O.ivor Hewitt, FiSq , trial justice, acting as coroner. Uoon thu view of the bo ly of Jamos W Browning, then and thcro being dead, by tho oaths of H J Brabtidin, tore in m, James M Smith, G Y Patrick, VV F Patrick, J S B Jones, J F Jones, W W Smoke, 8 F Fairy, Henry Smith, Audy Hamilton, Jack Joukius, G A llioo aud Jerry Thomas, being a lawful jury of inquest, who, boiug charged aud sworu to inquiie for thu State of South Carolina when and by what moans tho said damns W Browuiug came to his death, upon their oaths, do say : That tho said |J W Browuing caino to his death by being shot iu the right breast., uoar the rijjht nipplo, tho bill ranging through tho lower lobe of tho right lung, said wound bciug iuflicted by a pistol ball, shot from a pistol in tho hand of J \V Crum, in the town of Bamberg, bctwoju the hours of 8 und D o'clock, oo Saturday evening, August tho twenty-ninth, A. I), eighteen hund red nnd Boventy-four; and so tho jurors a!'orcsa:d, ou their oaths aforomd, do say : That, the aforesaid J W Browning was, in manner and form aforesaid, by the said J\V Crum, then and there felon iously killed, against tho povjoand digni y of the sum 5 State aforesaid. In witness whereof 1, Oliver Hewitt, trial justice, acting coroner afoneslid, nnd the jurors aforesaid to the inquisi tion, have set our hands and seals, t he day nnd year aforesaid. (Signed) OLIVER HEWITT, Trial Justice, acting Coroner. II J Brabham, foreman : Jas M Smith, G Y 1? trick, W V Patrick, JSB Jones, J P Jones, W W Smoko, S T Fairy, II \V Smith. <-.i A Rice, Andy x Hamilton, Jack z Joukens, Jerry x Thomas. Story of a Postal Card A prominent mere haut in St. Joseph , Mo , J. B. Johnson, lOsq., lias got hitn self into trouble, the pist:n i-tor of St. Joseph into trouble, the postmaster o! Chicago into trouble; aud the Gover n incut of the Unite 1 States into trouble all crowing out of a bit of pasteboard with some writing on it. Some wocks ago Mr. Johnson, bav in* occasion to order s him g.mJs from Chicago, paste 1 a label abiiut the size of a posing j Btamp, bearing his business address, on the postal card. The Chic igo cor re?p indent received the card in due time, but bad to piy six cents extr.i postage, aud so notified M r. .Johnson. As the latter had been in the habit of posting these labels for so no timu and had never before been called uoou f-r extra postage, he cms'iltcd the post muster of St. Joseph, Mr. Ainholdl about it. The latter authority informed him that he had a right to label the cuds and could continue to do so 'vith sifoty, unless the cards were going to Chicago, whose postmaster didn't uudcr.st tu 1 the aw. Thereupon, in a happy frame of mind Mr. Johnson addressed a bard to tlu Chicago house in his best handwriting, and. wit Ii n feeling of exultation, tri' uuiphuhtly and in a bold hand wrote these words: 'Our postmaster saya your postmistor is an ass.' The Chicago postmaster forwarded the obnoxious p.Mini card to Washing ! ton Mr Cresswell put on his spectacles an I read the St. Joseph postmaster's pithy .opinion of tho Ohic-igo pisttnis tcr. The scsult of the reading was a postal card from Mr Cresswell to the St Louis postmaster which noirly lifted tho latter functionary out of his boots, ami made hitn realize us he had never done be'bro how frail the tenure of a postinistor may be. Thcrcupou the postmaster called up on Mi Johnson, and informed him tint he had never said the postmaster of Chi CBgO was an ass. Mr Johnson brushed up his memory and after awhile, concluded th it he w is mistaken in the language he used; and gave his postmaster a statement to that effect. This relieved the postmaster He for\Vardod the statement to Mr Cresswell, and once more felt secure in his office. Put it did not end here, for on Thur.s day la*t an order came for the arrest of Mr Johnson for using scurrilous Ian euageon a j ostal card, nnd that night he was arr>:st< d Thus for the sake of a litilo business l.ibel about the size of 11 dostage stamp the St Joseph merchant got into a dilli oulty with the St Joseph postmaster arid the Chicago postmaster; got the St Jo soph postmaster and tho Chicago post master by tho ears; got the St Joseph pcstimistcr into trouble with the govern meat, nnd has got himself into a tight place, in which ho may have to pay from 8100 tp,$1,000, or go to jail and stay from 0110 year to ten years before he can extricate himself. Sundry Matters If there is no insurance upon the ,b irn, ono should bo procured without dolay. The vapor Irotn a bar0ful of new bay or grasn is ono of the best co 1 duclor of lightning. Batho tho wh do body with cold water every night, and rub briskly with a dry towel. This brings refreshing sleep, and conduces to health. (Jive the men and boys a buckot with soap ami towels, that they may do the same. They will work the better for it. ?????? . - ? -. A married lady, who is in the habit of spouding most of her time in the soaicty of her neighbors, happmol ti bo takeu ill, and sent ha' huib.wi 1 in groat haste for a physician. Thehusbaui ran a short distance, and then returned, exclaiming, uMy dear, where shall 1 1 bud you when 1 come back V gHonor Your Calling* It in a good sign wlien a man is proud of hi:-work. Yet nothing is more com mon Ulun to hear men finding fault con stantly with their particular business, aud deeming themselves unfortunate bo cause.- fastened to it, by the necessity of paining a livelihood. In this spirit men fret, nnd Jn'joriously destroy all their comfort in v ork. Oce?sionu'ly, a man fails in lifo he causa' he is not in tho placo fitted for his peculiar talent; it h appens ton times ol'tencr that failure results from neglect aud even contempt of an honest busi ncs;;?0--A man should put his heart into everything that ho docs. There is not' U profession in tho world th it has not its peculiar cares and voxu-.ioas. No man will escape annoyance by changing business. No inoohauical business is altogether agreeable. Commerce, in its endless varieties, is nfibctcd like all other human pursuits, with trials, un weloouio duties, and spirittiring ncccssi tits. l It ia the very wantonness of folly for a man to search out tho frets and burdens of his calling, and give his mind- every day to a consideration of them. They belong to human life. They- arc inevitable. Brooding, then, only gives them strength. Od ' the other hand, a man has a p ?wer given him to shed bouuty an I pleasure upon tho humbles toil if ho is wisel'Lct a man adopt his budncss,na:id identify it with his lifo, and cover it with pleasant associations For Heaven has given us imaginations unt alone to make some men poets, but. to enable all men; to beautify homely things Look at good things. Accept your lot as a man docs a piece of rugged ground, and bepih to got out tho rocks aud routs. 10 dconpn and mellow the soil, to enrich and plant it. '] hero is something in tho most forbidden avocation around which in:iy twine pleasant fancies, out of wh'io h may be developed an honest pride. A man can impart to a business a flavor of honor by his own conduct, which shall make it hereafter more, cred itabh: to any one who enters it. Frank lin left upon the printing oitico tin im press which has bcncfittcd the profession of printers ever since Blacksmiths -l"*?Crtn speak of the uucanoji ized JOIihu Burnt t. Once let a man convert his business into un instrument of honor, benuvo'eua i and patriotism, and from that moment it is transfigured, and men judge its dignity and merit, nol by what it externally is, but by what it has done and can do. It is better to stick to vour business, nnd by patient industry and honorable enterprise to crown it with honor, than to run away from it, and to seek prosperity ready-made to your hand*. It is not what a man find* that docs him good, but what he docs. ? - - ? <? i-i - . ' The vJooil old Times." Wo shall hoar from a thousand stumps the Democratic clamor for a re turn to 'the goo 1 old times.' Many a hungry politician will hoar the Bound and believe it tho promise of tho good time when tho cry. '1 am a D unocrat!' Will.upon to tho faithful thu fattest offices of the land. No doubt Tweed, the dethroned king of Taramauy, as ho sits with stripped .suit and shaved iu his forced retirement and moralizes over the dogeiidracy of the times, luoks for ward to the hour when the Democratic wand shall open his prison doors and reinstate him iu tho political kingdom which he lost We have no desire to welcome the return of the 'good old times.' We have had enough of then. They cost us over $3,000,UUO,000 and over halt a million lives. Wo are doing our best to repair the injury, au 1 hope in less than a soord of yours to wipe out the list trace of Democratic misrule We have reduced tho debt nearly $ 100, 0?0,OU? ill il little over five years, and shall continue its reduction until ever cent is puid. But wo protest ngninst the ret^ru of tho times which forced this burden on the notion. Ouco in a thousand years wo might end uro a like experience, but to go through it agtiu during tho present century would tlX good nature beyond tho point of endu rance Wo might live through an epi demic, bo tranquil over tho escape of Tweed; road the details of thu Brooklyn scandal every day in tho year, but noth ingshort of a direct interposition ol Providence could make us submit with cheerfulness to the good old times of Democracy. May tho sacrifice never bo culled fur. A pig was born recently in Columbus with a half human fnco unti head, per fect chin and mouth, signs of a largo tusk on one side of the mouth, and a perfect elephant's trunk extended from the forehead, with oars similarly shaped to those of an elephant. It will beau interesting fact to psychulogtsU to know that a circus h id passe 1 through Colu.n bus somo months before this pig was born, and that there was an elephant with it Tho maternal sow may have scon t It a clophaht?heuco the above monstrosity.* The Fellow that Looks Like Mc. Max Adder, who writes for a Phila delphia paper, has a friend named Slim mcr, who deserves pity. He was going up to Heading not long since, aud when reaching the depot ho happened to look iu the lady's room. A woman sat there with a lot of baggage aud three children, nnd when she saw Slim mer she rushed toward him, and before he could defend himself sho throw her arms about his neck, nestled her Load upon his breast, and burst into tears. Slimmer was amazed, indignant, con founded ; aud oro ho could find utter ance for his feelings, she exclaimed? "(). Henry, dear Henry ! wo are united at last. Are you well ? Is Aunt Martha still alive S Haven't you longed to see your own Louisa?" And she looked iuto Slimmer's face and siniled through her tears. "Madam," said he, solemnly, "if I am the person alluded to as Henry, per mit me to say that you have made a mistake. My name is Lemuel, I have no Aunt Martha, and I dou't own a solitary Louisa. Oblige me by letting go my coat; it excite? remark." Then sho buried her bonnet deeper into his waistcoat, and begin to cry harder than ever, and said ? "(), Henry, how can you treat me so? How can you pretend that you are not my husband?" '?Madam," screamed Slimmer, "ifyou don't cease slopping my shirt bosaai, and remove ?our umbrella from my corn, I shall be obliged to call the police. Let mc go, I say." '?The children are here," she por sisted. "They recognize their dear father; don't you, children ?" "Yes, yes," tlioy exclaimed, "it's pa; it's our own dear pa." And then they grabbed Slimmer by his trowscr legs aud hang to his coat tail. "Woman !" he shrieked, "this is get ting serious. Unhand mc, 1 say." And he tried to disengage himself from her embrace?while all the brake men aud the baggage master, and tho newsboys stojd around, and said his conduct was infamous. In the midst of tho struggle a stranger cutercd with a carpet bag. lie h.oked exactly like Slimmer?and when ho saw his wife in Slimmer's arms he became excited, nud iloorcd Slimmer with that carpet-bag and sat ou him, and smote his nose, and caromed on his head, and asked him what be mernt Slimuier was removed on a stretcher, and the enemy went oil" with his wile aud family in a cab. He called next day to apologize. His wife bad made the mistake because of Slimmer's like ness to him. And now Slimmer wishes he may soon Le kicked in the face by a mule, so that he will resemble uo other human being iu the world. How They Finally Got Married. One long simmer afternoon there oamo to Mr- Davidson's the most curi ous specimen of an old bachelor the world ever heard of. He was old. gray wrinkled and od 1. He hated old wo men, especially old maide, and wasn't afraid to say so. He and Aunt Patty had it hot whenever chauco drew thorn together; yet still he came, and it was noticed that Aunt Patty took unusual pain with her dress wheucver ho was expected. One day the contest waged unusul'ay strong, and Aunt Patty left in disgust and went out into the garden. ?That bear; sho muttered to herself as she stopped to gather a flower which attracted her attcntiou 'What did you run for V said a gruff voice behind her. 'To get rid of you ?' 'You didu't do it, did you ?' 'No; you are worse thau a burdock bur.' 'Von won't get rid of me, either.' 'I won't eh V '.Only in ono way.' 'And that?' 'Marry mo.' 'What! us two fools get marriod! What would neoplo say ?' 'That's nothing to us. Come, say, yes or uo; I'm in a hurry.' J Well, no then.' 'Very well; good by, I Bhan't come nga in.' 'Stop a bit?what a pucker you'ro in.' 'Yes or uo!' '1 must consclt?' 'All right; I thought you were of age. doud-by.' "Would my little Ezra, askod a fond mother, "like to be a missionary, aud go preach to tho suffering heathen ?" Tears?bright poarly drops ol fooling!? glistened in little Ezra's oyes as ho mui mured : "No, I wouldn't; but I'd liko to be on the perlice long enough to put a tin roof on the big lummux that stuck shoemaker's wax ou my seat to-day at school." According to Dr Magin, no oigar smoker over committed suicide. Useful Information- 9 >?! Rhubarb | leaves pattered around will kill and drive away crickets. 'To clean marble, rub first with soda and soft soap, then wash as usual with water. The fumcB of a brimstone match will remove berry stains from a book, paper, or engraving. A Hille black pepper in some cotton dippied iu sweet oil is ono of the quick est, remedies known for earache. To reniovo iron rust from linen, ap ply lemon-juice and salt and expose to the bud. Make two applications if noo cssary. Simply bind chips Jof wood, four or fivo inches long, to tho hen's legs, leav ing only the hip joints in working or der, and this will euro her of sotting. Calves do not injure an orchard, but usually improve tho fruit by picking up the wormy fruit as soon as it falls, and thus destroy tho insect eggs. 'Calves soldo n aro inclined to gnaw tho bark or to injure eveu small trees; they will sometimes rub against tho trees, but could do no damage unless to tho30 new ly set. A Boston Negro's Opinion of Beocli cr Rev. DoWitt Talmago fcclla the old slory here again; how, a few years ago, he walked iuto a Presbyterian church in Boston. As ho entered, d colored sexton, now attending tho colorol con vention in Saratoga, bowed and said, 'Have a seat, sah?' -Plenty of.scats dis mornin', sah.' 'No, 'hank you, can't stay but a mo ment Just stepped in to soo tho church What is the name of the clergyman ? Can't sec very plain.' 'That, sah; is llcvarand Henry Wad Bcecha, sah ! 'Fine preacher, isn't he?' reiurnod Mr. Tal mage. 'Well, sah, peoples has difieront no tions 'bout preachers?' 'But he scfems quito animated.' 'Yes, sah; cousib'blo animated,' 'And appoars to have talent/ 'Well sab, as I said afo, peoples his such different notious 'bout proichers. Par's some dat tinks he's mighty good on dc words. I link myself he's a far man, sah?a very far man sah; but not of the pritna facie class. He's a good man, sah?a well meanin' man, but not a talented man. lie's a New York man sah.' A gentleman at Lako George, after waving his handkerchief for half an hour or more at an unknown lady, whom he discovered at a distant point on the shore, was cucouraged by a warm re sponse to his sigual to approach his charmer. Imagine his feelings whou, on drawing ucarcr, ho saw that it was his own dear wife, whom ho had loft at tho hotel but a short time before. "Why, how remarkable wo shoald have recognized each other at so great a dis tance," exclaimed both in the same broath, aud then they changod the subject. 1 If your sister fell into a well, why, couldu't j'ou rescue her ? Because you conldu't be a brother aud assist her too. Not one of the many balloon ascen sions made this summer has produced a fact to confirm tho notion of a steady easterly currents iu tho upper air. Don Piatt says shfowdly; , Humor is to a newspaper what a tail is to a kite?very absurd but very necessary to its asceusiou.' Hair brushes with musical boxes in their covers are tho latest invention. A cockney says they will play a hair while you arc brushing your 'air. For removing grease spots from any f ubrio, use ammonia, nearly pure, thon lay white blotliug paper over tho spot aud irou lightly . A student of anatomy Bays ho has not yet bcon ablo to discover tho 'bone of contention.' but he thinks it must bo situated near the jaw honor 'John,' said a father to his son ono day when ho caught .him shaving the down off his upper lip, 'dou't throw your shaving water out when thero nro bare footed boys, for they might got their feet pricked,' Wo ofton hear of pooplo who are too poor to marry, but a California couple, who had been engaged for sotno tune, married because they could not afford to keep two scparato rooms in a boarding houso. A lad who borrowed a dictionary to road returned it after ho had got through with tho remark: It was worry nice reading, but it somehow changed tho bubject worry ofton.' It was his siator tcr who thought tho first ioe croam she tasted was a lcctlc touohod with the frost.