The Orangeburg news. (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1867-1875, June 28, 1873, Image 10
Darwinism in tlio Kitchen.
JTI TIT TU i ftTfl \ ? F ? IT
I i&sjtakia' oft my bonnet
Qne artornoon, at three,
hen a binseok juaip'd ?peti It,
Ab proved to bu a fleo.
Thon I takes it to the grato,
Between the bars te stick it;
But 1 hnda't loag te wait
Ere it changed tuto a cricket.
Says I, "CuroA'c ray senses
Is a-gettin' in a fog,"
So to drownd it I ceiumcnccs,
Whou it halters to a frog.
Hero my heart h?gan to thump,
And no wonder I felt funky:
For the frog, with one big jump,
Leap'd hisself into a monkey.
Then I open'd wide my eyes,
His features for to scan,
And observed, with great surprise,
That the monkey was a man.
But he vanished from my sight,
But 1 sunk upon the tloer,
Just n& Missus, with n light,
Como inside the kitching door.
Then beginning to abuse me,
She says, "Sarah, you've been di inkin'!
I says, "No, mum, you'll excuse me,
But I've merely been a-thinking.
"But, as sure as I'amn cinder,
That party, what you seo ?
A-gettin' out o' winder,
Have developed from .a Sec '"
The Original "Arkansas Travelt r.v
We make no apology for publishing
this old, old story*'?'tis true that it was
written long ago, but it really never gets
old in one sense of the word. We have
bad many a hearty laugh over it, and i.
our readers will carefully study it thov
will Qnd much in it to interest them.
Tbc sceno is that of a dilapidated 1 g
Cabin in Arkansas. Its Uramali* per
svnac is a trapper seated up in an iaver
ted tub, playing the first part of a fami
liar air upou an old violin, and his wife
and children. A stranger enters and
the following colloquy takes place:
Stranger?"How do you do sir? Are
you well ?"
Trapper?"Stranger, kin you call ^
mat1 who cats three s'i?nr meals a day
drinks hearty, aud sleep sound, woll ?"
(Fiddles.)
S.? I think I could. How long have
you been living hero?"
?I.?D'ye ye see that mountain tbar ?"
S.?"Well.'
T.?"That worh'yar when I come
hyai." (Fiddles.)
S,?"Thank you for the informs
? tion."
T.?"You're welcome."
S.?"Cun I stay here to night ?"
.?"Well, you can't stay b'yar."
S.?How long will it take to get to
the ucxt tavern ?"
T.?"Well, you'll not get tberc at all
if you stand thar fooliu' with mo all
night." (Fiddles.)
S.?"How far do you call it to the
next tavern ?"
X?"I recken it's upward's o's'oinc
distance
S.?Do you keep any spirits iu this
house!"
'f.?"Guess t bur's plouty down in the
grave yard." (Fiddles.)
S.?"How do you cross the river
ahead,
T.?The duels swim across." (Fid
dles.)
S.? How far is it to tbo forks of the
road ?"
T.?"Tbo road ain't forked yet in
these diggius." (Fiddles.)
S.?"Where does this road go to?"
T.?Well it ain't moved a step biueo
I've been b'yar'"
S.?'Why don't yoa. repair the roof of
your bouse ? It must leak."
S,?-Cos it's been raining like all crea
tion for three weeks." (Fiddles.)
S.? Why dou't you mend it when it's
not raining ?"
? T.?Cos, then it don't leak." (Fid
dles )
8.?"Why don't you play the second
part of that tuno ?' ? j
T.?Cos, I dou't know it. Kin you '."
< S.?I can'"
T.?"You kin? Look h'yar stranger,
nny man who can play tbo secooud part
of that tuno can go right iuto Cougrcsa
onto it."
S.?"Givo me tbo fiddlo." (Taking
the fiddlo and plnys cut in: tune.)
T.? Yelling with joy.) "Thats it by
. goll. Do it agnin stranger, Vahoy !
(shaking hands.) 11'yah make yourself
at home. You can stay a week, live and
"die here if it's agreeable. Hore, Sal,
hxiog out that jug, and go dig some
sassafras root and make the stranger a
evp of sea. Shako hands again stranger !
By j. oil, your'e a trump?you ar e! Play
it again !"
Teetotaler* who felicitate themselves
on Ibo progress of thejir cause will do
well to digest the fed lowing : An old
stager was compelled by his worthy
spouse to "join tho cold water army,"
whioh ho did promising never to touoh
a drop of anything olso, except in sick
ness. So far the story is excellent. But
now for the moral. ... The reformed
i (dividual has never been teell $incc\
l eb 22d
Fever aud Ague, |
from which mankind suffer over a largo partof |
the globe, is tho consequence of a diseased notion
in the system, induced by the poisonous miasm of
vegetable decay. This exhalation is evolved by
the action of solar bent on wot noil, and rises with
the watery vapor from it. While the sun is below
tho horizon this vapor lingers near tho earth's aar
faer, aad tho virus is taken with it through tho
luflgfl into the blood. Thcrait acts as an irritating
poison on the internet viscera.and excreting organs
of the body. The liver becomes torpid and fails to
socreto not only this virus, but also the bile from
the blood. Both the virus and ?hc bile nccumulato
in tho circulation, and produce violent constitu
tional disorder. The spleen, the kidneys, nnd the
stomach sympathize with the liver, and become
disordored'nlso. Finally, the instinct of our pr
ganisra, as if In an attempt to expel the noxious
infusion, concentrates the whole blood of the body
in tho internal excretories to force them to cast tt
out. The blood leaves the surfac?, and rushes to
the central organs with congestive violence. This
is the Chili?. But in this effort it falls. Then tho
FbVBR follows, in which the blood leaves the cen
tral organs aud rushes to the surface, as if in
uuother effort to expel tho irritating poison through
that other great excretory?the skin. In tide
also it fails, and the system abandons tho attempt
exhausted, and waits fiir the recovery of strength
to repeat the hopeless effort another day. These
are the fits or paroxysms of Pbvbb and Ann:.
Such constitutional disorder will of course under
mine the health if it itt not removed.
Wo have lubored to fiud, and have found, an
antidote,
Ayer's Ague Cure,
whioh neutralises this malarious poison In the
blood, aud stimulates the liver to expel It from the
body. As it should, so it docs cure this afflicting
disorder with perfect certainty. And it docs more,
or rather docs what is of more service to those sub
ject to this infection. If taken in season it expels
it from the system as it is absorbed, and thus keeps
those who use it free from its attacks; keeps the
system in health although exposed to the disease.
Consequently it not only cures, but protects from,
the great variety of affections which arc induced
bt this malignant influence, such as Remittent
Fever, Chill Fever, Dumb, or Masked Ague,
Periodical Headache, or Bilious Headache, Bilious
Fevers, Neuralgia, Rheumatism, Gout, Blindness,
Toothache, Karacho, Catarrh, Asthma, Palpita
tions, Painful Affections of the Spleen, Hyperica,
Colic, Paralysis, nnd Painful Alloctions' of tho
Stomfich nna Bownls, nil of whit h, When arising
from this cause, will be found to assume more or
less the intermittent type. This *? Ague CunE"
removes the cause of these derangements, and cares
tho disease.
This it accomplishes by stimulating the excre
tories to expel the virus from the system; nnd
these organs by degrees become habited to do this
their office of their own nccord. Hence nrises what
wc term aeclimatation. Time may accomplish the
same end, but often life is not 1o?k enough, or ia
sacrificed la the attempt, while this " Aau.fc v* rb "
does it at once, and with safety. Wc have grunt
reason to believe this is a surer 01 well as safer
remedy for the whole class of diseases 'which arc
caused by the miasmatic infection, than any other
which has been discovered ; nnd it has still another
important advantage to the public, which is, that
it is cheap as well as good.
rner-AREn nr
DR. J. C. AYE It & CO.
LOWELL, MAPS.
Price Okb Dollar rti; Bottlb.
Ayer's Cherry Pectoral
has won for itself such a renown for the cure of
every variety of Thront and Lung Cumplnint, that
It is entirely unnecessary for us to recount the
evidence of Its virtues, wherever it has been em
ployed. .As it has long been in constant use
throughout this section, wo need not do more than
assure tho people its quality is kept up to the besi
it ever hns been, nnd that it may be relied on to
Uw rui oivii icum att l* "as ctvt bevu tuuuu 10 uu,
Ayer's Cathartic Pills,
FOR All THE PURPOSES OF A PURGATIVE MEDICINE.
For Cost i yen ess ;
For tub Ctntn ok Dyspepsia ;
For Jaundice ;
For tuk Cvre of Indigestion ;
For Headache;
For tue Cube op Dthkntbrt;
For a Fori. Stomach ;
For tue Ci uk op Fkysipelas;
For tuk Pii.ks ;
For the CURB of Scrofula ;
For ali. SciiQPULoi's Complaints;
Fou niK Curb op Rheumatism;
For Diseases of tue Saw ;
For the Ct nr op Liver Comtlaintj
For Dropsy ;
For the Cure of Tetter, Tumors and Salt
Rheim;
For Worms;
For the Curb op Goft;
For a Dinner Pile;
For the Cuba of N^ raloia;
For Pfhuyivo tue Blood.
They are sugar-coated, so that the most sensi
tive can take them pleasantly, and being purely
vegetable, uo harm can arise from their ut>c m any
quantity.
Prioo 25 cents per Box; Five boxes for $1.00.
Grent numbers of Clergymen, Physicians, States
men, nnd eminent personages, ha\e lent their
names to certify the unparalleled usefulness of these
remedies, but our space here will not permit the
insertion of them. The Agents below named fur
nish gratis our American Almanac in which they
arc given ; with nl.so full descriptions Of the nbove
romplnints, nnd the treatment that tihould be fol
lowed for their cure. .
Do not be put otf by unprincipled dealers with
other preparations they make more profit on.
Demand Ayer's, and take no others. The sick
want the beat aid there is fur the in, and they should
have It. Z
All our Remedies arc for sale by
in ay 11 c 1 y
TI1F. OLD ESTABLISHED
^chud ({Iji?oicn (^oflcffc
OF A.U/<RICA.
THE
No. 8 N. Charles Street, ?
BALTIMORE, MZXi
Organlird tmtt IMnitrtt Entirety to Prepnrtnf
^Oixiuj arid dt/iddlo ridged d?en
to BkTCOMM THOMODQB
(Practical Jlcccnintants
a*t>
OVER 2500 YOUNG MEN
rnoM tum
SOUTHERN STA TES
have GRADUATED at thi* INSTITCTION, and
urr ntrw filling Hesfnmil'lt and Ijscrath* Positions in
the Leading BANKS AND BUSINESS HOUSES ?J
the Country.
THERE ARE NO VACATIONS. Students can
enter at any tint*.
Special Individual Instruction and tutctit gnarnn
teed. Send fine College Documents and splendid S/eci'
t*tk* ?f I'enm.inshifi. Enclose fttnt t'ostagt Stam/s.
Address nil Communications I*
W.fJJ. BAD LIC ft, PreiH.
I > ? * ' r Southern Business Collegt,
BALTIMORE. MQ.
DOES
. ?' :i \ '? >? ?? ?? v > ' e>
Everbody in this Town and Couuty know of the GOOD THINGS in tho Grocery
and Provision Line to bo found at 0. D. KOKT.JHHN'S Popular Store.
If not the announcement will be of more importance to lloupa
koepeiM and Farmers than the news of
CABBY'S
Death. Qnality CTcuuino, Stock Completo and Fresh, Prices CHEAP and
UNIFORM
And goncrul satisfaction guaranteed.
MyLlQUOUS and WINES are
FIT
To please th* taste of every clasa of Customers, from men like the famous and
fastidious
CAPTAIN JACK
To the humblest llouseholdor of tho lund
Flours, Su-jiirs, Teas, Ct.fToe, II.icon,
Lord, Scgars, Tobacco, Kino Coguacjllrandy und Pure Wliiskuy for Medicinal
purposes. All to he had for the asking at
C. D. KOHTJOHFS
At lTNDEKliUKK'S OLD STAND.
may 17
J. W. PATRICK & CO.
(SUCCESSOR TO)
T. c;. \"inok.
ncspeetrully call 11 ??- all en I ton of I ho public to tWir NEW ADDITION of SPRING
'GOODS just received and for sale al EXCEEDINGLY Low PRICES. Our stock consists
in port of
L Eft OS, JAPANESB; GRENADINES, oll. COL'D PERCALES POLKA DOTS, LAWNS.
CROCflLT NAINSOOKS. PLAIN AND OH ECK CAMBRIC
W?ITE AND COLORED ORGANDIES. '
SWISS.
PIQUE.
NOTIONS, I'ATt.YSOT.S, &C.
LATEST STTLB8 SPUING CLOTHING AND GENTS FURNISHING
GOODS.|
We have brctight to Mils Market the CKLKBUtTER SiVR SHIlti
which wu guarantee to I'lT and WEAR lu:!!cr than any other kind. Measures tak"n and
made t<? order.
Having for a l>>np lime ? ic< -a tho necessity of introducing a FIRST CLASS RUOT
and SIB OF. in this Market, will make iliis Department a SPECIALTY, where can be
round any kind of Root* :i?? <1 ,Shft<*j? di???ir??il Irnm ihn, nie-." Phila Inlnhln ha.ll I made In
the more i.".,......?> gi"uv?. Cull uuu inspect oui stock uolu?H*you pure.iuso auj soj it wo
??an please you.
J. W. PATRICK & CO
nprl 2G 62
GREAT REDUCTION
IN
AT
D.LOUIS'
Now is the time to get BARGAINS.
Call soon
may ia , tr
WE ARE NOW
Ol'KNtNO 01 JR.
Stock of Spring and Summer Goods,
Snobs? WHITE OOODS, PRINTS, NOTIONS, AC.
Also a full Line of LADIES, MI88E8 and GENTB SHOES, with HATS, TIES,
COLLARS and CUFFS.
FINE OLD II AT ANA CHI ARM.
In these "Hard Times to Live" we have on hand many arloles that will contribute great
y to the "creature comforts."
We intend to koep always "FULL UP" in the
GROCERY TANK
And sell them CHEAP for cash. All ore respcctlully invited to call and examine our
STOCK and PRICES.
M0SELEY & CROOK.
OPPOSITE CITIZENS SAYlNtjS BANK,
mar 20 feb H 1?
SOUTH CAROLINA. BAILKAOD.
CHA?i.i!STrm, 8. C. December 14, 1872.
ON AND A FT KU SUNDAY DECEMBER
14, the Passenger Truin ou the South
Carolina Railroad will run us follows:
roii roM'MiiiA.
Leave Charleston.,.9.30 A. M.
Arrivo at Columbia.r?.20 1?. M.
FOR AUGUSTA.
Leave Clmrloston..'.0.30 A. M.
Arrive at Augusta.5.'JO P. M.
KOIl nilABI.RSTOX.
Leave Columbia.9.00 P. M.
Arrivo al Charle ?ton.4.15 P. M.
Leave August a.9.00 A. M.
Arrive at Charleston.4.45 A. M.
COLUMBIA N1UIIT BXPBKSS?SUNDAYS KXCKPT
Kl>.
Leave Charleston.7.30 P. M.
Arrive lit Columbia.6.80 A. M.
Leave Coluoibia.7.80 P. M.
Arrive at Charleston.4 45 A. M.
AUUUSTA KIOIIT BXPBBSS?SOKDATS HXCRPTBD
Leave Charleston.8.80 P. M.
Arrivo at Augustu.?.7.8G A. M.
Leave Augusta.8.15 P. M
Arrive at Charleston..">..r>0 A. M.
St.MMKKVII.I.K TUA1N.
Leave Bummcrvillc at.7.25 A. M.
Arrive al Charleston at.8.40 A. M.
Leave Charleston ?t.:t.;t5 P. M.
Arrive at SumiAorville at.1.50 P. M.
CAMUKN BBASCOII.
Leave Camden.7 20 A. M.
Arrive at Columbia..11.55 A. M.
Leave Columbia.2.10 P. M.
\rrivc at Camden. 8.55 P. M. I
Day and Night Train? connect at Augusta,
with Macou and Augusta Kail Road, Central
Rail Road and Georgia Kail Ho.id. This is
I he quickest and most direct route, anl as
comfortable and cheap as any other route to
Louisville, Cincinnati, Chicago, St. Louis,
and all other points West and Northwest.
Columbia Night Train connects with
Greenville and Columbia Railroad, nn 1 Day
and Night Trains connect with Charlotte
Road.
Through Tickets on sale, via this route to
all points North.
Camden Train connects at Kingville daily
(except Sundays) with nay Passenger Train,
and runs through t<> Columbia.
A L. TYLER, Vico-Presidcnt.
S. B. PlUKKKS, General Ticket Agent.
Doors, Sashes, Blinds, &c
P. P. TO ALE,
Manufacturer and Dealer,
No. "JO Wayne Street and lfor'.bcck's Wharf
CHAR or..} l U.v, a. v>.
5>iy- This is the Largest and most Com
plete Factory of the kind in the Southern
State?, mid nil articles in this line ean be
furnished by Mr. P. P. Tom.Bat prices which
defy competition.
BziT' A pamphlet 'A;llli full and detailed
list of ?11 sixes of Doors Sashes and Winds,
and the prices of each, will be sent free und
post l'aid, ou upplicatiod to'
I P. P. TOALF,
CHARLESTON, S. C.
july 15 woe *
HONEY CANNOT BUY IT!
r<?r Night Ih Priceless!!
BUJTIIE DIAMOND SPECTACLE8 WILL
PRESERVE IT.
?CotO jS^i MASK_
If yOu Value your Fyrsight u?r these Per
feet Lenses. Ground from Minute Crystal
Pebblva, Mulled together, and derive thoir
name ??Diamond" on aerount of their H ud
ness and Brilliancy. They will last many
years wit bo til change, nud arc warranted
superior lo all others in use.
Manufactured by .the Spencer Optica'.
Manufacturing Co., New York.
CAUTION.?None Uenuing unless stump
? 1 wish our trude mark.
For Sale by Responsible Agents through
out the Union.
E. .1. OLIV EROS,
jan 20?ly Orangebnrg. S. C.
Citizens' Savings Bank
OF SOUTH CAROLINA,
OrttfiKchqrg ltraiM-li.
Will puv 7 PER CENT. I NT KR F.ST on
SPECIAL DEPOSITS ami ? PER CENT, an
SAVINGS DEPOSITS, Compounded Serai
annually.
Ijooal Finance Committee.
lion TITOS. W. GLOVER.
Col. PAUL S. KKi/DER.
Capt. JNO. A. HAMILTON.
J AS. 11. FOWLKS,
Assistant Cashier,
mat- 23 jun cly
At Private Sale.
mHE PLANTATION forming a part ol
J. the Estate of the late Col. Keitt, and
known as tho DARRY PLACE. Tho tract
consists of about 000 acres, one half well
Timbered, tho rcniaindor Rich, Bed, Loam
Soil, adapted to Crops of all kinds. These
.ire the Finest Lands in the District, and
were valued at $'J0 per acre in 1H6R. Would
bo sold for one-half Iba? ,>i ice now. One
fourth cash, the remuir er in three instni
ments bearing interest from date and se
cured by mortgage of tho same.
This is a splendid chance for anerync dt ?
siring to seouro Rich Lands, fine Walor Pow
er, excellent Cattle Rango and a Refined
Neighborhood. Apply to
Mrs. L. M. KRITT,
Or J ? KEITT, Esq.
jan ti
d?? to *ao PKW WAV! AKcnt*
?pr) WANTED! All classes ?r working
people, of either sc?, young or old, make
more tauooy m work fop ua in their spare
moment?. or all the time, than at anything
else. Particulars free. Addrosa
0J 8TINSON k CO.,
?op? f \ \\ti\\^ Ma^e
ARRIVING BY EVERY
NORTHERN STEAMER,
at
GEO. H. CORNELSON'S.
Tn order to be prepared for the demands of the reason, I am receiving large supplies of
all the various goods needed at this lime of the year; such as
P'untation Bupplics, Tools, Plows, Iron, <e
And everything Hue necessary to mukc a crop. I am Agent for the following valuable
and established Manures :
ETI WAN OUANO,
KT I WAN DI8SOLVED RONE,
ETI WAN CHOP FOOD,
ATLANTIC PHOSPHATE.
ATLANTIC ACID PHOSPHATE,
E FRANK COE'8 PHOSPHATE,
PERUVIAN OUANO.
LAND PLASTER LIME AND SALT.
All the nbov<> Manures are offered at manufacturers prices will be sold at the same
terms as at the works and will be delivered if requested at any depot on theSoath Carolina
Railroads.
jeb 1 GEO. H. CORNKLSON.
DUKES' HOTEL.
RUSSELL-STREET, ORANGEBURG, S. C.
The Subscriber take* great pleasure in announcing to his FRIENDS and the COM
MUNITY '.lint he has OPENED n FIRST-CLASS HOTEL, at the Large Residence receat
1y occupied by Mr. Untie Wnniiiirunker. Comfortable Accommodations, a Bounteous
Table nnd CourtCUS Attention are Guaranteed.
jau 18?3m J. W. II. DIKES.
HEGULAH DAILY TRADE.
ANOTHER TRAIN JUST IX AND FILLED WITH
D ESIRABLE GOODS!
AND QUSTOMElia SllOWMNG AT *
BULL, SCOVILL k PIKE,
Making Selection from their Extraordinary Large end Varied Stock of
GEN Ell AL MERCHANDISE.
Their assortment, will? constant additions, is
UNSURPASSED
Both as to STYLES and QUALITIES.
Their facilities in drawing supplies from desirable Markets
EOR THE CASH
Enable them fo make the best possib'c RATES, which is tho OLD RULE con
tinued from its ORGANIZATION?
1.8-4 2, \
Giving an experience of 30 years in Business.
Economy nnd Enterprise, together with the Energy and ??otleraan!j deport
rrient of all their Assistants, are always found at the OLD ESTABLISHED*
HOUSE of
BULL, SCOVILL & PIKE.
may 25 c \j
WOULD INKOPM THE TUBLIC TITAT IIB 18 STTLf. (TARRYIW OX TTM5 C*R*-,
liage Maklhg in all its various branches, aad wiR Manufacture er Repai* at the
Shortest Not ice, all Carriage;-, Buggies or Wagons. Asm! am also prepared whk
NEW PRESS AND Q XJ TO GIN AND PACK COTTON
_ ' ._ * ? :j. *v. *?s?Ta Ihm. .
SHORT NOTICE. Cotton 0INNER AT MY MILL has brought from | W j eent me e
than that Oinncd on the common G?u?.
vi\ y\ n. rio<w.