Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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68 a' $hei*8 i*M J*. .fc .t. [1113*3 KTft aaov ,H3< 800 A HIA8 Jtt _ .."fcWO DOLLAUS DER ANNUM Stil jirii yiKittw?) ? .. : _i|g_ ? 4*Ht *rfl I r*lU i? MUT*!-'III ?s 1 ?JgfMtc1.1? J 'Tttfw Volume 5., i ?*??<? ?* _!-L-? ?-~?-:-_ SA?Tu|dAY MORNINjIfEBRUARY 3, 1872. ??i '??iit ? i ffM iL A .. n sir 7 j pi tgjJ . GpD ^VT^? OUR vQUNTKY. 0??TJ J MST IAO? n<.? <{ ALWAYS IN. A?VANOK. _ .,, - _'? lr\ ' .... ?? N UMBER 51 ?gii i Nu i - TEE ORANGES (JR(j NEWS ? 1* ??*? 8 f.{.???'J j.i 4~*0!*? OHANGKB?RG | Krery Saturday Morning. HY TJIK "tfftAttGEBURa NEWS CO.UPANY - ?' ??.'? .-< w ? irtt irHto:? TERMS OF SB ASCRIPTION. One Copy lor one vcar. $2.00 .' S?* Vonth,. 1.00 Aay one ?ending TEN DOLLARS, for a* Olnb of New Subscribers, will rcj^isA-Aft? . RXTRA COrV for ONE YEAR, free of charge. Any one sending FIVE DOLLARS," far ? Club of New Subscribers, will r;>coiv<\ aa EXTRA COPY for SIX MONTH*, fifof .*.rge. U 11 1 ... ; . i nrrriPInrn I . RATES OF ADVERTISING. 1 Square 1st Insertion.. $l./>0 it m 2d " .i. 1.00 . A Square comigts of 10 lincB Brevier or . ota* inch of Advertising apace. ?j Administrator's Notices,.$5 O&i Notices of Dismissal of Guardians, Ad ministrator*, Executors &o.$0 00 Contrr.ot Advertisements inserted upon the ', 'taost liberal termn. -:o: MARRIAGE ami F.UNKRAL NOTICES, hot exceeding-one S(pture, inserted without Charge. I *sr Terms Cash in Advance, "?a MALCOLM I. BROWNING BAS nov 4 ATTORN KY AT LA W, ORAXGEISL'RU C\ II., So. Ca i? AUGUSTUS B. K.N0WLT0N (Formerly ot me New York Bar.) ATTORNEY AND COUNSELLOR AT LAW, OUANGKIIURCJ, S. C. I_!_^rM tf.ri AV. X,. W. IlILEY TRIAL JUSTICE, Residence In Fork of Edislo, _^_ALL JCSINE^ENTRUSJ&U,, wjll,bc, promptly and carefully attended to. .< i july '23 ly DR. T. BERWICK LEG-ARE, SURGEON DENTIST, .^?Xffl?08,,to,,CBC OFFICE MARKET-ST. OVER STORE OF J. A. HAMILTON, METALIC CASES. THE UNDERSIGNED HAS ON HAND all of the various Sir.es of the nbovc Citsea, which con be furnished immediately Jon ap plication. Also manufactures WOOD COFFINS aa uaual, and at the shortest notice. Apply to H. RIOGS. mar 5?bin Ctirriago Manufacturer. REEDER & DAVIS, COTTON FACTORS ' I 111' t ? '. I M, i mm? Aar? General Commission Merchants, A<ign's Wimrj, CHARLESTON, S. 0. Oswri.i, Rr.Enr.b. Zixmeujuan Davis. oot 16 Gin T. F. BapOJK, R. R. Hynoisa IL C. floDuuia. bbodi?; & co. COTTON FACTORS COMMISSION MERCHANTS, NORTH ATLANTIC WI/ARF, CHARESTON, S. C. Liberal Adv iiccs made on Consignment. aRaraii to .mdrew Simouds, Esq., Pres t lat National Bank, Charlcaton,' S. C. way ill wee tf WASHINGTON HOUSE BY ? ? i Mrs. M. W. Stratton, svl a "it 9 ??v8 4;oliNKa * * l?H GERVAIS fc ASSEMBLY STnEE'J s COU'MBIA, S. (. Convenient 10 Hie Greenville ami Charleston Railroad* and the 13 us in600 portion of the City. Rule of Transient Board?Two Dollars per Dny. Regular Boarders received at Reasonable/ Rile*. H Si Jkm dec 10. . tf. ul21I% ff i! Whither, midst falling dew, While glow the heuycnn with the last Staps Far through their rosy depths, dost thtffl pursue TgO*) Tf M<0 D/.M.IN1 Thy solitary way ! lOfiaU* bJUtl? " T/ l! ,WIOU?J| Vaiuly the fowlor'a eye Might mark thy distant flight to do thee. "rone',.. , , wo to rswnll ( As, darkly painted ou the crimson sky, Thy figure floats along. u.?,ri1~ r^1i'?l thou tat? p)a?*;H Of weedy lake, or marge of river wido. Or whero the rooking billows rise and stnl Ou tho chciod ocean ?ide ? There is n power whose care Teaches thy way ntongthat pathless coast,? The desert and illhnitablo air,? Lone wandering, but not lo.lt. All day thy wings hare fann'd, At that far height, the cold, thin atmosphere, Vet ?'o: p not, weary, to the weleodhsjutfM^I ivW ^boVKVfMrdarX^igariffW And soon that toil shall end; Soon shult thou find a summer home, and rest,- I I And aeretira among thy fellows ; rccds shall bend, Soon, o'er thy sheltor'd nest. Thou'rt gone, the abyss of heaven SWallow'd up thy form; yet, on my heart Deeply hath sunk the lesson thou bait given, And shall nut soon depart. He who, from tone to xone, Guides through tho boundless sky thy cer tain flight, In the long way tbnt I must tread alone, Will lead my steps aright. U tti.._I Tin: fixgt:r i>f fa BY W I am goinc to give you an instance of the desperately strong measures Fate will take, in order to bring about an eveat she has set bet* mind upon. I am a iniddl-.nged bachelor, of staid fortably "off," having an indopmidpnt income of $-400 a year, and a Civil Ser vice pension ol'.J;7.(J0 a year. I was for niarty-^pnra- St cvo^ny^of the * YttnrVnnt ofliceis' Shirt-Frill und Shaving-Soap Department?a branch office uuder the Admiralty, Somerset House. I have led a quiet aud retired lifo? shunning ''society" in its gayest seiuse, and associating intimately with three or four other bends of subordinate depart ments, and with no one else. * 1 am naturally nervous, uudj 1 urn afraid, irritable. 1 hate bright colors, unneces sary conversation, useless noises,?such as vocal nod iustrumeutal music, aud the neighing of horses,?and I can't bear to sec people in quick motion. If J I had my way, no oue should speak to me except on matters of pure .business, und only then, when the communica tion could not be conveniently reduced into tho form of a memontnuVm. Above all other things, I dole&t forward peo-1 pie; uud above all other forward people, I detest strangers, who address mo on immaterial topics in pdblic couveyau ces. I had occasion, n few weeks after my retirement from official li&, to travel to Glasgow by tho limited mail, on my way to New York. It is a long journey to Glasgow ? twelve hours?tlic train leaving Fuston Square at uinc, J\ . M., | -nna proioaeing to arrive at nine, A^*l , the ne*t dsy. A railway-journey to Glasgow is detestable, but posting is worse, and walking out of the question. It was a cold night iu April. There were very few passengers by tho limited mail. There were only four first-class carriages to Glasgow : of these, three were occupied by thrco ladies-?one in each carriage; tho fourth was a smoking enninge, und empty. I don't smoke; but the train was on tho poiul of start ing, aud the guard assured mc that it was unlikely thut we should take Up any first-cluB* passengers ou our way. It was u ucw carriage, and had- never been j used. At all events, I was safe from f ?mole intrusion ; so I jumped in. The traiu started, aud I hud my carriage, all to myself. The train did not stop till-we reached llugby. At Rugby, a lady opened the carriogo door. She was a stout, plain, middle-aged woman?fivo tod forty, I should fay. She Wae extravagantly dressed in showy colors: IU;r complex ion was very dark, aud she wore a re spectable nioustuuho. This wouldn't do ; I could setfle far at all events, '1 beg your pardon, imVum, but this is n smoking-carriage." 'I^ictfy/iReplied the lady, with a yo^^^lll accent, 'bdt I spoken.' This wae a contiugencj that I had ?Y)ca\^i^^:^W(iV sar ?' said the foreign lady. Here was a chance of es cape 1 x44*t 1' she sbfctf ''Bot, Th ; guard came up. 'You ir??e hie l;ght V And he gate her a light, and then he -WaM&arou1. 0 "im[ no conse ?Ah,'replied the lady,'you obj^Mfol smoke?you travel in smoking-carriage i Doukcy?jackass donkey!' ff> Shc^||^^LB^Mflhree words with the air of one-who had dune a short ad dition sum, aud was stating tho total. I . 1 had never travelled abroad, hut I , kuew that foreigners arc remarkable for ' their politeness I 'I entered this carriage to avoid tho ['Society ol ladieo.' 'Me, too,' taid the foreign lady. 1 'Dash ! I hate lady. ? like gcUtleAA*r j Then she udded us au altcr-tbiyjPit. 'You arc haughty old customer, but I like t/ou?you. rummy old pa^cpger J' I was exceedingly annoyed at this I plume myself on my good taste, in dress ? that is to say, I t?tuu^r to drc^s myself in such a way as to call for do remark of any kind, which I hold to be the per Ife^mh "Of good taste! ^uy personal ap pearance is simply geutleuianly, without any thing remarkable about it. It has been my constai?? study t<: be gentleman, ly. hut usual; Mid to he called a -rummy old pnrscugor' wast under the circum stances', t*n irritating thing However, l maintainc 1 a dii^fii?ea silence. It was a very cold night, and my fel low passenger had evidently a strong ?il'is ;' so 1" i irritate herlil I let Accordingly I did passenger.' she said. 'I like fresh airs. I ^let this one down too !' And she. lowered the other win dow. I Couldn*|!stand the draught, so 1 put up my window---and sho put up hers. I was sulkily furious by this time In [half nn horfr we fheuld reach Staf.ord, and L determined to change my Carriage at that station 1 n tho meantime I iried ^to sleep, but the foreign lady kept up such an incessant clutter, that sleep was j out of the'question. 'Where you going, old passenger? You dot fell? Secret, eh? Ah, sly dog ? You old cashier, perhaps, bolt ing with bank moneys, eh ? Confiden tial clerk, with employer's cash box in portmanteau, eh ? Old buy going up north to marry old girl on ihe sly, eh ? 15agmao, end1 ashamed of it, perhaps, eli, you old passenger ? U.tli ! Hag man eood as anybody else ! Never be ashamed?look at me! Me not blush at myself. YVhat you say I am??eh? You not guess. Duohess ? No! Count ess? No! Lady of large property? wife of Glasgow merchant ? X>evil a bit! Missionary woman? No. . i. lit rope dancer? No! Stewardess ocl West .....' '**?"? fc** *? ACS?tni4t " it! CojSic home* sit months. Fiud big Ameri 'nn ship water-logged ?cargo 'notions'?nobody on board hut pussy cat, you rummy old passenger?boarded her?Hullo ! What's tlf.it.' 1 did not know what it was, but there was S sudden snap, and our carriage gradually slackened speed, ami eventu ally stopped. 1 put my head out of the* window. The coupling bad broken, and our carriage and the guard's vau hud been separated from the rest of the train. The driver knew nothing about it; und there we were, haW-wuy between Stafford and Kugbf at twelve, A. M.,l on ii very cold April Slight | 'Great Heavens '.' "said I, in the very greatest alarm, 'the coupling tins broken and wo are lefo behind by the train ! We shall bo smushed- by the next dowu train !' 'Not a bit, you old strungc one!; replied she, without ?vcn looking out of the wiudow 'Guard at end of train. If we broke ofT, he broke off too.' The guard had in point of ??et rushed forward, Wiving his lantern tn'the faint hope of being nble to alttact tho aftcbtiou of the driver, but in vuiu. So lie re* turned, very excited but very sulky j rid aruV we to' dot" youanjd your'tfdW smbridge to I 10 help ,?:J mites; ?L T? ? fr it ia ratn ked.' tho oom ^^frere, you ock 'era up. i?at here.' old man,' your arm, P-' I succurab )k over a halt' a mile ion had a Bitting at ion ; and if d her np sixteen >aok legrapn. uomo, outyo 'Hut where are we to g ing hard, aud wo shall be 'There's a light yonder mon. Yon'd better trot an^y^rMTw^aMu* kdlnl Mk Mk. elate And off he went like ligh 'His advice very good said my eompaniou. 'I and we trot. Come, rum There was no help for i ha id fi :r. Idtub ii! Fuiutesl prov her up ouce, 1 twenty times. Twenty stone is exactly two tons- -which rcpre scuts the wt ight I lifted o if Berabridge Common that night. (I h vre sine?- had reason to believe that llorJ Jctual weight is fifteen stone three, but 1} say sixteen stone, because I take into (co the moisture with which h I saturated.) |> At length, after t.venty^inutcs' diffi W-V"JL*3^Jfki*??J#? light that had attracted our aUeutiou; It proceed ed from the window of a v~s ry small cot tage. Wo knocked, und I Veotually tho door was opened to us. 1 u the mean time, my eompaniou. who had informed mo that her name was Do r*y Furtesoue, sang negro ?onp in a deep "^orrtrslto. 'Wot is it ?' said the cottager 'There bus boon an reejideut on the line, and wc want shelter.* ' Wot'll you j^ive ?' usideration clothes were rum old card give a giiuei ?Well, you can lie in th cottage is chock-full.' Ho took a lantern, ajpj| to the 'stable,' *h>h !. This atable\~"J?ty .showed me hut with W?8 a very untidy donkey; I at once de clined to share this stable with Dolly, preferring to risk a night in the tain. I stated my intention. 'Old boy is quite right. lie's a rum my old passenger, but he's quite right. CiimtWntrfT nuaas littlo old man?we walk somewhere else.' 'Now, lookee here,' said the man ; wot's your g?<tue, you two ? Wot are ycr hup to? Is this here a lark? Wheie's my guinea ? Give us 'old o' n?y guinea afore you goes. Come !?he a gentleman afore you goes ! None of th is with me, you know! (Jive us 'old u' my guinea ' Come1!' 'Old man,' said polly to me, "pull mft employers' cash-box, and givo gir'.irex like birds.' 'Wot's this here about cash-boxes?' said tho man. ?Come, out with that guinea ! We hears a good deal -.bout it, but we don't sec nooc of it. Come, let's see Borne of it. He a man !' 'I shall give you nothing,' said I. You arc an insolent scoundrel !' 'Wot !' said the man?'wot's this here j about cash-boxes 1* Come along o* me !' ?auJdie Juid his hand upon my collar. 'You scoundrel;!' 'fan*!!, 'if i were a o'nger mail, f.d' 'Wot! assault the porlieo ' My eye'/ here's a go ! Come along o' me: TuV lIlO (*f\ ,?Ot?Km I'll irlVA* .*,-,,, n So, ii s cash-boxes, is it ? Come along u' me?both on yer !' Aud he l?>| us to a square building at the buck of his house, aud, unlocking the door, pushed us in. 'Now,' said he, 'I'm a-goiu' to sea ruh you.' And he did; but he found nothing ere ?pt a^ow sovereigns?-lor my mooey wa'a in my despatch bor, whiefc hud bvjen placed in tin: luggage-van. 'Now, said he, 'how about search in' your good womau ? I ain't a-goin' to do it?and I ain't got a missus. Lookee i here, ?upposo you do it?' v -Sir,' said I, ,tthis woman is a total stranger to me.' 'Ah ! sepnrnte responsibilities, eh? The hold story, Now, lookee here, ma'am, I ain't R'gOiu' to search you, because I've been1 properly brought up; but I'm a-goin'to shuke you, to see if you rattle Miss Fortcscue made no verb d reply, but pulled out a gigantic clasp knife. 'A? right,' said she. 'Cone on, po liceman !' He hesitated. . 'j/ook, policeman; f toll' jvu what I i?o. 1 wttlk out of^?his. '(.rood nights!' "And vlic did. ' ' The policeman turned pale and civil. 'Ain't you goiu' along with bor, sirf aatd he. " M am not.' I'paaa the night here/ iTe'retire^, fwoaring fluently, and locked the door on me. I could not ele-tfp?toft,- s$ ?II cteflt?, I was Free at last fron* my proaecutrl*. I was ao pleased, that I Rang a irter ry song, and carved my name on the* wall with a rusty .nail, as other prisoners nun; done before me. The nest day I was taken before a magistrate, who dis missed tho case at once, and I resumed ttty journey. When I reached Glasgow, I found that my ship was on the point of sailing My luggage bad been placed on board, and my half-cabin was ready for me. We had dreadful weather at >ca ; we were driven many hundred miles out of our course; and for three weeks after leaving Glasgow I was terribly ill, and did not leave my cabin. I believe I should not have left nay, cabin at til if I lud not Been thrown bodily o*t of it by a tremendous concussion one very stormy night. I rushed on deck, and found every thiug in the wildest confusion. A fear ful storm was raging, and the ship had struck on a sunken roek. Th re waa absolutely uo hope for her, and it was I impossible to launch a boat, cveu if it could have lived in such a sea. I don't want to harrow anybody, so I will content myself wit* explaining that amid the shrieks of three hundred peo pie, the vessel foundered. I alwaya take the precaution, when at sea, of wearing a little india-rubber apparatus round my ueek, which I in flate, aud in that oondition it prevents my head from going under. 1 inflated it hastily, and 1 found that'll answered admirably. 1 was tossed about violently for some hours, and when tho gale at tiabgth "abaided, I was far out at sea. No J?tfd *r*s visible; and as I rose and fell in the sulky lopping eea, 1 felt that 'My ?M wj/iriUttf. Yiooltcd^gerTy^ towarch the horizon on all aides, in the vain hope of sceiug a distaut aoil, but 1 saw uoue. There was, Lowever, one thing iu view?a dark rouud thing floating oi. the waves a mile or so from me. I struck out for it, and I was hor rified to fiud that it was alive ! Stil! I approached it, reflecting that death- from a Bta-ruonater was preferable to death from starvation, aud to my amazomont 1 found that it was making straight in my direction. Ou approaching it, I was appalled to find that it resembled noth wf*2 so much as a human head in a floating plate; and on coming within three or four yards, 1 discovered that it was the head of Miss Fortescue, suppor ted above water by aooutrivanoe similar in character to the apparatus 1 have already described. I should add that her great fat bunchy body, and ( L had no doubt) her legs, were still couuected with it. 'Not Miss Fortescue V said I. 'llummy old passenger, by Gar 1' said she. 'What you doing here, ear?' 'I am not here by choice. I was wrecked in the 'Auron. Borealia.' '.Nie, too !' said she. 'You!'said I. 'Were you on (board tiro Aurora V '?Borealis." added she. 'Ye*?me stewardess. How are you 7' '1 urn very cold, and this confounded thing has given me a crick in the neck.' ?Situation damp,' said she. 'Try this, you queer one !' It was a flask of brandy. She held it to my lips until I had ttkuu a comforta ble draught. 'Two shillings,' said ahe, holding the bottle to the light to see hbw much I had1 faked". 'Hefe it is ' said I. 'Stewardess, a shilling?make three.' I determined to resist this extortion, for ou that Hue of packets the steward's foe is included in tho fare. I told1 her so. 'You mean old cuss !' said Mislf For tescue. '1 give you nothing more : I tried to look dignified and iodifom ent, but it War of no use. You can't look dignified' vrhon you'arc'perpetually bobbing ap and- down on a lopping sea, supported eutirely by au InrJtu.rubber bag rouud the nn.de Beside*, I was' very hungry, titid'ahe had'a large water proof brisket/ on the arm. So I give her the ubiHiug, which she bit and-pock eted. "Now Mien;' said she, 'what's to do next V 'What a&Yc you got there?' paid I. 'Garsi&a Baa sage?cucumber?carrot ?-bottle barley-water?tiro tomatoea?a bloater?two egg*?one pound macaroni ?bead of endive?stick Spanish liquo rice? three pounds enuff." 'What are your terms for* tire carrot V ?Carrot very dear out herd, yorf pteon liar old croc*. Carrot a guinea/ 'IIund it over.' I gave hor a guinea and ate the* cSr rot. 'Now,' said ?oe, 'I go straight on in that direction for shore. Cotno along, old one 1' 'Never V said I; 'I will take the oppo site point of the compass, and run my chance. Oood-by.' And I struck out vigorously in tho opposite direction. After a day and a halfa figo7ot?* swimming, I reached the point of a low sandy shore, which seemed to stretch for miles in a direction due south, ss I judged from the position of the sun. I was jreU satisfiod tp feel dry ground un do** my legs ogain, and I landed With much gratitude. I was extremely hungry, and 1 walk ed for mites along the shore picking up mussels and periwinkles, and eating them raw. I saw no trace of a human being of any kiud. and as the sun went down I began to wish myself in tho sea again. Night came on, and I was hnngry and alone. However, I still i wandered on in a listless, purposeless way until I fell over something that lay across my path. To ttry intense joy I ftuud, ou investigation, that it was a sleeping, breathing human Bfelng. I could not tell whether it was a man or a woman, as there was no moon, and the clothes he or she wore might have suited! cither ser! equally well. I endeavored to awaken the figure, but in vain; so I determined to sit by his or her side until morning. Accordingly I dropped myself iuto* a* sitting position, when, to my extrem?' amazement, an eiplooioa of fire took pfaco immediately under me \ HfTtc J&nrrtil!TJ,ea ffaarleJ1 across r?e that the rsmnd was a mass of slumbering fire, only wafting for accidental contact with an exciting cause to blow itsolf and every thing upoa it miles into the air I On closer examination, however, I found that I had sut down npon a box of vesu vians, aud that one of them had explo ded. It suddenly occurred to me to use these vesuvians as a means of identify ing nry companion. I ignited one, but it was not a flaming vesuvian; it smoul ded, and fizzed, and smelt, but afforded no assistance. I lit another, and held it close to the person's nose, but it only illuminated a small circle as big as a half-crown- I lit a third, and this time the red hot end tumbled on to the slee per's cheek. The sleeper started up. It was Dolly Fortcrcue ! I was not a bit surprised. I had brought myself to look upon Dolly as my fate. Dolly was not a bit surprised. She looked at mc?grinued and spoke. 'That dash hot,-you odtfobtel* Wheu mcrirmg bro?e, we looked about us. The island we found was about twenty-five miles long aud seven broad, principally rock ? no vegetation ? no fresh water. The island was crescent shaped, the two horns being twenty miles asunder. I had lauded on oue horn, she ou the other, and we had irfetf in the middle. Tho only native iuhabi ?*n*a ?r ?i., -i-:^?iiSm mussels. So We set to Work to make ourselves cbmfortabiu. The object of this narrative is* not to give a detailed' aceunnt of tho highly ingeuiius manner in Which we Contrived to live comfortably, and oven iuxurously oh our island, but rather to exhibit the caprices of u determined destiny. I detested- Dolly with all my heart, aud'avoided' hor Whenever practicable ; but she paid' mxs every attention, and, notwithstanding her unpleasant appear ance, she was really valuable to mo. She christened tho island 'FoHefcue,' and crowned me its monarch. My first act as king was to try her f^r drawing her knife on'the policeman in Menth ridge lock-up, and by that means breaking out of custody. Site was found guilty by an imphrti&i jiiry of Me, and sentenced to transportation for life on the other side of the islaud. She weut, meekly and uncomplainingly?but, as she took all our cooking implements with her, I was obliged to foiiow. 1 his inconvenient life weut on for thirteen years. At the expiration- ol that period, my kingdom was visited-by a missionary ship, which hud drifted out ot her course. 1 signalled aud my sig nals were answered. A boat full of Baptist 'oTiSiionaricB put off to ob, bear ing many bales of tracts for our conver sion. They were very mpch disappoin ted and disgusted when ihey hoard thaf we were Christians. Aul when wo added that wo wdre Protesfatsts, they moodily returned to their 1>oats, an?} nfe&hanically began to put off to sea. I screamed aloud in .cry, terror at their contemplated departure without us. Their chief explained that their uiis ruion was to convert, and thai, we needed no conversion. '?To? 1 tri? % Christian,' fcald he? ?'Protestant, said, no doubt, Baptist. What can we do?' <i 'No,'said I, as ? ray of hope broke through the clouds that were gathering" around us, 'not Baptist?Church of En gland r1 'Hal' said their leader; 'wil' you lot me make a Baptist of yoii, if 4r iko your with us 7' 'I am open to conviction,' said I. 'Andyour wife?" said he. ' 'This is hot my wife V said I, far s fusslc-ia. o 'Shocking, indeed?' said he. Will yon marry her if I take yon off?' ?Yes,' said Polly, 'he will marry me, yon melancholy old Presbyterian !' So he took us into the boat, an 1 we rVfti the island.' We were married as soon as we reached England. In a week my wife had enough of me, end fed. The arrears of my pension amounted1 to something considerable, and she ran* off with them, t ran after her, but I could never find her. I aap? pose, now that I Want her, I never shall1. i trnmu -? ??M il Not A Satisfactory Experi ment.? Here is a bit of grotesque hu mor from New Orleans r? Mr. Gray discovered s non explosive illuminating fluid. To show bow aafo the new compound was, be invited a number of his friends to meet him in his rooms, whither he bad brought a barrel of the fluid, which he at once pitnotaHied ,rn mir wiib-s ^?bat^kiy.. As he went through the roof of hit house, accompanied by bis friends, be endeavored to explain to, his nearest compagnon de voyage that the particular fluid in the barrel had too much boosters in it; but the geutlsman said be had an engagement higher up, and could not wait for the explanation. Mr. Gray continued his ascent till he met Mr. Jonetr,- Who informed him that there was no necessity for him' to' go' up high er, as everybody was coming down; h > Mr. Gray star"ted back to be with the prfrty. Mr.1 Gray's widow offers for sale the secret for the manufacture of the non-explosive fluid at a reduced rate, as she wishes to raise money enough' tV buy a silver-handed cof?u, with, a gilt plat?, for the late Mr. Gray. No cards. A gentleman'who had taken the home cars for the' Worcester Depot in Boston, iueumbcred with manifold bags and par* cars, reached the bell-rope with an effort when ho wished to get off, and gave a vigorous pull; the result was a sharp ring from both bells.' ?What are you ringing both ends for ?' Was the discourteous anti* surly itay quiry of the conductor. 'Because I wish the car to' stop at both code,' waa the quiet reply that left a convulsed car-load and dlaeom?tcd conductor. Fall and Winter' Goods,! F. W. H. BriggJfiann HAS jost received- a FULL STOCE of DRY r.?^DS, CLOTHING, FANCY ?OODS, (SHOES, HATS, Ac. All my goods is LOW ia price te suit tfcV timer". My mbito in snail profits and qaiek saler My stock of i HARDWARE. CROCKERY WARE, ft ROC ERIKS, . LIQUORS, WINES, ALK. LAUER BEER, 4r., is of (he first quality ar.d low in pfiee COTTON and all otH-r Frcnaea boughs at the highest market price. P. IT. W. BR1GGMANH. cot 14 oat % \y ! OllANGEBURG?In Co.m>imv tr-LI!jftr Wculey Heuser, Adm'r, vs Amcnia Speigtitr' 'and other?. r>v order of the Court in thisVri.sli. ! will sell for cash, on the srtlt-duy in' r'ehrusry neat, (1st Monday, ) hO acres of land on the Sanies River, which was of the Kit ate of Fly Zciglcr, deceased. rurcha??er to tey for title. ?KO. UOLIYRR. Jan IS, 1872.??0-~td Rcf rw-.