Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page. It is also available as plain text as well as XML.

?BW) J,i: ?S : I ?n ucil??B ?_? I i .. ' . ' aAUftjjjtaHjfVbuu vjiii.il ?lii ?dl b*d Srtiritrf' ,-1 ' -?, Klo ) '.'ihm'* danT iiio^-^ir ? r ? ? In , \.'ml am/ |>?Aai>>qi)M ?< tu tut ?Mf3 da hl'iii Iii./ 1 .. ,miiii u?i u l r j.-H )o d?H ??l ? ? Hl ?'<<> fl - !' ./.JlWfariTOii^ ANNUM. ' w.'c"; . i. ? vir.ti , i. . ! TOME 3. -1-r i? aas ? v: LACTOCUR \ vi aar* * .noils uU'S TTTLT GOD ^lNTD OU COUNTRY. SATURDAY MOR mng, :>U>8 JUNE 12, 1869. NUMBER 1" TW ? firrtrfts Woman, and how She .T ? MlllH/?4*4 .i.li.l.. t u/! **BWilanl/'lct 'looso P Pandemonium iu tebelli?h ! Chads ' turned inside out! M^pj^tfW.^o reason a man cannot be al lowed to sleep in tbo morning without tbfcl everlasting racket raised about bis ??*wT ChiMnaw cryidg?doors slam ming?I will know the reason of all ibis uproar !" Mr.' Luke Darcy shut tho door of his hed^-foom., with considerable emphasis, attll went straight to the breakfast par lor. AHSrqs Vright and quiot and pleasant thWe ) the coal snapping and sparkling In the grate, the china and silver neatly arranged on the spotless damask cloth, and the green parrot drowsily winking his yelUw eyes in tVe sunny glow of the eastern wiudow?Bedlam plainly wasn't located just there, and Mr. Durcy wont stonningly up stairs to the nursery, Alt ! tho field of battle was gained at last. Mrs. Daroy sat in her little low chair before the fire, trying to quiet the screams of au eight months old baby scion of the house of Darcy, while soother?a boy of five years?lay on his back,, proue on the floor, kicking and crying iu an ungovernable fit of childish passion. ?HjpMjH Dar?cy!" enunciated Luke, witb a slow and ominous precision, "may I inquire what all this means ? Are you aware that it is fifteen minutes past nine o'clock ? Do you know that breakfast is waiting ?" . "I know Luke?I know*," said poor, perplexed Mrs. Darcy, striving vainly to lift'the rebellious urchin up by one arm, ''Come, Freddy, you srosgoing to be good now, mamma, u sure, and get up aud be washed.'' > "No?o-?1" roared Master Frcddj', performing a brisk tattoo ou the carpet with his' heels, and el awing the air fu $^^ltWtii9*ki .??feSgio nit . <?* >i\UTa1i.]y' pounced abruptly down on his son and heir, and carried bim promptly to the closet, and turned the key upou his screams. "Now, sir, you can cry it out at your leisure. Kvelyn, nurse is waiting for tho baby. We'll go dowu and breakfast." "Hut, Luke," hesitated Mrs. Darcy, "you won't leave Freddy there." "Wou't; I'd like to know why not ? It's temper, aud nothing else, that is at the bottom of all of these demonstra tions, and I'll conquer that temper or I'll know the reason why. It ought to have becu checked long ago, but you are so ridiculously indulgent. There is noth ing I have so little tolerance for as a had temper?nothing that ought to lie so promptly and severely dealt with." "But if he'll say he's sorry Luke ?" Mr. Darcy rapped sharply at the pan els of the door: "Aro you sorry for your naughtiness, young mau V A fresh outb.irst of screams and a re newal of the tattoo was the answer. "I am sure he is sorry, Luke," pleaded the all-extcnuating mother, but Mr. Daroy shook his head. "Kntiro submission is the only thing I will listen to," he s:iid shortly. "I tell vou, Evelyn, I am determined to uproot this temper." Evelyn, with a dewy moisture shadow - iug her eyelashes, and a dull ache at her heart, followed her licgo lord down to tho breakfast table, with as little appetite for tho coffee, toast and eggs as might be. A tall, blue-cyed young lady, with u profusion of bright chesuut hair, and cheeks like rose velvet, wus already at the table whon they descended, by mime of Clara Pruyn, by lineage Mrs. Darcy's sister. She opened her eyes rather wide as the two entered. ?'Good gracious, Evy, what's the mat ter ?" "Nothing," auswered Luke, tartly. Mrs. Darcy, you appear to forgot that I have eaten no break fest." "Something is the matter, though," said Clara shrewdly. "What is it Eve lyn? Has Luke had one of his tan trums ?" Luke set dowu his coffee cup with a sharp "click." ??You use very peculiar expressions, Miss Pruyn." "Very true ones," said Clara saucily. Evelyn smiled in spite of hcrsolt. "It's only Freddy, who feels a little cross, and-^" "A little cross !" interrupted the in dignant husband. "Itcll you, Eyclyn, it's quite timo lb.it temper was" checked. ph,-thfltffcrrot! \yl.cit an intolpfablc screechS^liseWieepsi upjl Maiyvtajke that bird into the kitchon? or I shall be tempted to wring its neck. ?Strange that a man can't hnvca little peace once in Hwbilo ! What does ail the eggs, Evelyn ? I thought I had asked you to see that they were boiled fit for a Christian to eat." Mr. Darcy gave bis egg, shell and all, a vindictive throw upon the grate. Evelyn's brown eyes spurkled dangerous ly ns she observed tho manoeuvre, but she made no remark. "And the plates are as cold as stone, when I've implored you agniu aud again, I that they might be warmed. Well, 1 i shall eat no breakfast this morning." "Whom will you puuish most f" de manded Miss Clara. "Evelyu, give me another cup of coffee j it is perfectly de lightful." Luke pushed his chair back with a vengeance, and took up his stand with his back to the fire, both hands under his coat tails. "Please sir," said the servant, advan cing, "the gas bill?tho man says would you settle it while?" "No!" roared Luke tempestuously, "Tell the man to go about bis busiuess ; I'll have uo small bills this morning, and I won't be so persecuted !" Mary retreated precipitately. Clara raised her long brown eyelashes. "Do you kuow Luke," she said de-1 murcly, "1 think you would feel a great deal better if you would do just as Fred dy does?lie down flat on the floor and kick your heels against the carpet for a while. It's au excellent escape valve when your choler gets the better ot you." Luke gave his mischievous sister-in law a glance that certainly ought to have, annihilated her, aud walked out ot the room, closing the door behind him with B-rng that would bear no interpretation TJicu Clara c:\inc.arcmr^j-^}^^ ^ aircr^'nr^H^'hoi'^mk T.ice in Evilyn's neck. "Don't scold me, Evy, please ? I kuow I've been very uaughty to tease Luke so!" '?You have spoken nothing but the truth," said Evelyn, quietly, with her coral lips compressed, and a scarlet spot burning <>n either check. Clara, I some times wonder bow J can endure the daily cross of my husband's bad temper." '?Temper !" said Clara, with a to.-.- of her chestiut brown hair. "And the poor dear fellow hasn't the lead idea how dis agreeable ho makes himsolf." "Only this morning," said Evelyn, "he punished Freddy with unrelenting severity for a lit of ill humor Which he himself has duplicated within the last half hour. I am not a moralist, but it strikes me that the fault is rather more to be censured in a full-grown reasoning man than in a child." "Evelyn," said Clara gravely, "do you suppr.se he is beyond the power of cure ?" "1 hope not ; but what can 1 do? Shut him up as he shut up little Fred dy ?" Evelyn's merry, irresistible laugh was checked by the arch, peculiar expessiou in Clara's blue eyes. "The remedy needs ty bo something short and sharp," said Clara, "add 'his j dark cio><ct system c<.;! i..!y C0u?hipcF both requisites. Tears and hysterics were played out long ago in matrimonial skirmishes, you know. Kvy." "Nonsense''' laughed Mrs. Darcy, rising from the breakfast table, in answer to her husband's peremptory summons from above Stairs, while Clara shrugged her shoulders and went to look for her work-basket. Luke was standing in front of his bu reau drawer, flinging shirts, collars, cra vats and stockings recklessly upon the bed-room floor. "I'd like to know where my silk hand kerchiefs arc, .Nlrs. Darcy ?" lie fumed. "Such a state as my bureau is in is enough to drive a man crazy !" "It's enough to drive a woman crazy, I think !" said Evelyn, hopelessly, stoop ing down to pick up a few id' the scat tered ai t ieles. "You were tit the bureau last, Luke. It is your old fault!" "My fault?of course it's my fault!" snarled Luke, giving Mrs. Darcy's poodle a kick that scut him howling to his mistress. "Aoyth ng but a woman's retorting, recriminating tongue. Mrs. Darcy, 1 won't endure it any longer !" "Neither will I !" said Evelyn, reso lutely advancing, as her husband plunged into the closet after his busiuess coat, and promptly shutting aud looking the door, "I tuThk" I'vo endured it long enough?nod hero, is an end of it !" ''Mrs. parcy, open the door'." said Irtike, scarcely' able to credit the evi V ' h.^u tulWC'.' 'JiU rtttol hi bt< no deuce of h? own senses. "I shall do no such tiling/' s.iid Mis. Darcy, composedly, beginning to ro-ar rangc shirts, stockings and flannel wrap pers iu their appropriate receptacles. ''Mrs. Dar?cy !" roared Luke, at a fever heat of impotent rage, "what on earth do you mean 1" "I mean to keep you iu that clothes press, Mr. Darcy, until you have made up your mind to come out in a more amiable frame ol mind. If the system succeeds with Freddy, it certainly ought to with you; I am sure your temper is much more intolerable than his." There was a dead silence of full sixty seconds in the clost, then a suddeu burst of vocal wrath. "Mrs. Darcy, open the door this in stant, madam ?" Mut Evelyn went on humming a saucy litlly opera air, aud arranging her clothes. ' Do you hear me ?" '?Yes?I hear you." "Will you obey me?" "Not until you have solemnly prom ised me to put some sort of control on that temper of yours; not until you pledge yourself to treat your wife as a lady should be treated; not a menial." "1 won't 1" "No? Then iu that case I hope you don't lind the atmosphere at all oppres sive there, as I think it probable you will remain there some time !" Another sixty seconds of dead silence, theu a sudden rain of In els and hands against the relentless wooden panels. "Let me out, 1 say, Mrs. Darcy ! mad am, how date you perpetrate this mon strous piece of audacity ?" '?My dear luko, how strongly you do remind me of Freddy. Y'ou see there is" 'C'tjW"': I have p,n IttUtv-*'?1'"- Ki^tV f ? a bad temper. It ought to have been cheeked long ago, only you know I'm so ridiculously indulgent." Mr. Darcy winced a little at the famil iar sound of Iiis own words. Tap-tap-tap came softly at the door. Mrs. Darcy composedly opened it, and saw her husband's little office boy "Please, mem, there's some gentlemen at the oflieo in a groat hurry to see Mr. Darcy. It's about the Applegate will case." .Mrs. Darcy hesitated an instant; there was a triumphant rustle iu the closet, and her determination was taken at once. "Tell the gentlemen that your master has a bad headache and won't be dowu town this morning." Luke gnashed his teeth audibly a tsoon as the closing of the door admonish- j cd him that be might do so with safety ??Mrs. Darcy, d j you presume to inter fete with the transaction of business that is vitally important, ma'am, vitally im portant !" Mrs. Darcy n tichalaiitly to..k up the. little opera air where she had left it, lot ting the soft Italian words musically oil her tongue. ?? EvcLj It, dear !" "What is it. Luke ?" she asked mild I.V. "Please let :::c out. My dear, this may be a j ike to you, but ??' ??I assure y< i. Luke, it's nothing of the kind, it is the soberest of serious matters to me. It is a question .vhether my future life shall be miserable or hap py\ There was a third interval of silence. "Evelyn," said Luke, presently, iu a sudd led voice, "will you open the door?' ' On one condition only." "And what is that !" "Ah, ha !" thought tho little lieuten ant-general, ??he's beginning to entertain conditions ol' capitulation, is he? <>n condition," she added aloud, "that you will break yourself of tho habit of speak ing crossly and sharly to me, and on all occasions keep your temper." ??My temper, indeed !" sputtered Luke "Just your temper," returned his wile, .? t 'uely. "Will you promise ?" "Never, madam \" Mrs. Darcy quietly took up a pair of hoso that required mending, and pre pared to leave tho apartment. As the door creaked on it.- hinges, however, a voice came sh'lly through the opposite key-hole. -Mrs. Darcy, Evelyn! wife : wife!" "Yos." "You arc not, going down stair: t( leave me in this place ? "I am " 1 "Well, look hcr?il promise. "AU and everything that I require ?" '?Yes, al! and everything that you re quire?confound it 111 I" W iscly d. af to tfce muttered sequel, Mrs. Darcy opened no door, and Luke stalked sullenly ouVltpoking right over the top of her shining browu hair. Suddenly' a Hetic detaining hand was laid on his coat sleeve. "Luke, dear?" "Well?" "Won't yon give rho a kiss ?' And Mrs. Darcy *urst out crying c her husband's ehouli for. "Well !" ejaoulatt ?t the puzzled Luke, "if you aren't the gi latest enigma going. A kiss? Yes, a ha t doss^n of 'em if I you want, you kind feartedl liitlo turn key. Do not cry p fc, I'm uot angry with you, although i 'suppose 1 ought to be." I 'And may 1 lef V eddy out ?" "Yes. on the sunn 'terms that his papa was released. Kveb i, was very intoler able?'' "Ifyouhudu't be >pj Luke, I never should have ventured on such a violent remedy." X "Did I irake you_ery unhappy*?" "Very." I And the gush of w.\rm sparkling tears supplied a di i'murylfull of words. Luke Darcy butto: 'cd up his overcoat, put on his h.it, shouldered his umbrella, and went to the Afplcgatc will case, musing as ho went ufon the new state of affairs presented itlelf for bis consid eration. ??By .Jove," ho ejafctlated, "that little wife of mine is . a 'fold woman and a plucky one !" j And thcu he burs .P. til. a laughing on the bteps. It is more than his stock of bad u imjs that d-'v, J uc -..aw auy inj)?^^?itjj4p^^'< redd element in his infantile" disposition. .Men. after all, are but children of a larger gtowthj aud so Mrs Mvelyn Darcy bad reasoned. Don't d? it.? Don't speak that hai sli unkind woid, and thus make sad the heart of another. Speak gently; 'tis ? better. Don't make the burden of anothei heavier when it is iu your power t. J lighten the same. Keep iu good humor; j anger is a waste of vitality. No man land no hoy does his best except when : du el ful. I A light heart nuke- nimble hands. ? and keep- the body healthy and free. I Don't let others say that you are > 1 : tish, and care only for yourself. Don't live for your own comfort and enjoyment alone; live lor others. Don't it igleet that precious s...i! com mitted to your charge; remember it must live forever. Don't turn away from the Bible; it i.- the b " !. by which you will bejudged. Lkak.n to Wait.?Of all lessons that humanity has to learn in life's school, the hardest is to learn to wait. Not to wait with the lidded hands that claim life's pr'zes without previous effort, but having struggled and crowded tho slow years with trial, see suchte ult a efiVi t s'.'CUlS to ruh! n iv. pel bap-. disaster instead. To .?fand firm al . m-l. u crisis of existence, uot to lose hold or to relax i fb rt, this is greatness, whetb r achieved by man or woman, whether the eye of the world notes it. or it is recorded in that book which the light of eternity shall alone make clear to the visi in. A Vam'.mji.k Hoy.?"What can you do?" asked a traveler of a country tirchin who was in front of a farmer'.- house tickling a '. <d with a long straw. "Oh, 1 can do mor's coiiHilcrahlc ? 1 rides the turkeys to water, milk.-the geese, end- (loWll the old rOOStCV, pllt. iip the pi.-.- tails in paper, tu make i in curl, hamstrings the grasshoppers, make fires for f?e?. to court by, keep (ally for daddy and mammy when they scold at a mark, and cuts the buttons off daddy's coat, when lie's at prayer iu the morn inc." A countryman who bad never paid more than twenty-five cents to see an exhibition, went Wednesday night to a Pittsburg theatre to see the Forty Thieves." The ticket seller charged him fifty ceuts for a ticket. I'm ing the pasteboard back, lie quiotly remarked, "Keep i?. mister; 1 don't waut to see the other thirty-nioe." and <>uf bo ar ched. Keep your Litt)?3 Brother out of the Room. John Smith?you've heard of huu? is very bashful ; is too bashful, in truth, lit: was born and raised in the'country. His father gave hi in a good education, and allows him plenty of money. Hut .lohn, with all other attachments, never could accustom himself to the society of females, not because he did not like the girls, but because his shy nature would uot permit him to associate with the fair s ;x. It once happened?not very long ago either?that John's father had some very important business to trausact iu the city. He also had some very par ticular affairs to attend to at home, which demanded his personal attention, and not possessing the power of ubiquity, he delegated bis son .lohn to transact that iu the city. John being thus commissioned, im mediately proceeded to the city, and to the residence of his father's old friend, whom he found to be a very nice old gentleman, with a beautiful daughter, aud gold spectacles. John was ushered into the parlor fa new thing for him), and motioned to a scat?no! a sofa, (another new thin-.. ]>ut we must use his own language : 1 took my seat and ^ade observations. Everything was [life ?'. Vine carpets, line solas, fine tables. Ii:." curtains, line books, tine everything, and especially a line young lady, who was dressed in fine silk, tine satin, and who had line curls, aud a tine appearance generally. After chatting with the old gentleman a few minutes, he took down his hat, told me to make myself at home for an hour or two. and left?left me alone with his daughter, and a small mischievous boy.jJio young lady's brother. 1 didn't relish the situation at all. The idea of keeping tt city belle engaged in convcrsa ?jkituiL ilil'_ 1 v._|B^iBj2Lj.l,'''iii^^^-^^jiji2. 1 rcigucd in"the parlor for a snort time. ! you may bet. I amused myself as much as possible with tin: b >y?that is. 1 loaned him my kuileand watch-key, and watched him cut holes in the carpet with one and spoil the other. I don't know "A bat 1 would have done h ol it not been toi lbat boy?be was so good to attract one's attention, you know. It's true he asked some startling ques tions, occasionally, such as this, for in stance; "Are you goin' to court sister Emily :" but such things must be c.v ! pcetcd under such circumstance. Miss Emiiy, thinking, no doubt, that to be a gooj hostest, lb n she must keep i her itcaI engaged n conversation, asked ! me "how i liked country life. ' etc. She 'said that -it must be a beautiful siubt to set! the laborers, male, and female, romp ; ing on the new no wu bay on New Year's ! hay; that site always did think she I would like to spend a Christmas in the :.miry a nut-gat boring with the village i I.e.!.-and lasses; ii...t it always bad been j a mystery to her, how they got eggs off j thr trees without breaking tin m." In return, I thought to ki ep up my \ point of the conversation, it was nccessa- j ' ry for mo to quote poetry and the line, i which i did. Among other quol ttious, j 1 I unfortunately repeated the well-known j line of Shakspciiro , ? There it a iliviuitj thai >h otii ends, \\\ u?1i iiV? tliem it v.. -.vi! 1."' At this juncture, the boy, who hud perched himself upon my knee.-, looked very earn s' ly iu nr. face and said: ? !>:v inity sit iped the end of your it . e mighty mi us I'm c rtain t hat I wisln d :?? mcbody w tuld -p ink the young Pascal. We talked of hills, mountains, valleys, cataracts?I believe I said watcr lalls, when the boy spoke up ami said : ??Why, sister's got a trunk full of 'em up stairs pap says they are made ol horse hair." This revelation struck terror into me and blushes into the checks of my fair companion It began to be very ;.p;-.r<ut to me that 1 must be very guarded iu what 1 said lost said boy might slip in his re marks if uncalled for places: iu fact I turned my conversation to him \ told him he ought to go homt with me, aud see what nice chiokons we h ol iu the country Unluckily I mentioned a yoks of calves my brothers owned. The word calves ruined all. '1 he little fellow looked up and paid: ? Sister's got a dozen of 'em, but she don't wear 'em only when she goes up town o' windy days." ''Leave the room, you unmannerly lit tle wr?toh!" exclsHiued Emily, "leave immediately !" "I know what you waul mo to leave for," replied he; "you cau't fool me? you want to sit in that man's lap, and kiss him like you did Hill Simmons the oilier dayr?you can't fool mo, I'lljes' toll you. Giu me some candy, like he did ; then I'll go. You think because you've got the Greoiau bend that you're smart. Guess I known a thing or two. 1 am mad at you, anyhow, oause pap would a bought me a top yesterday, if it hadn't been lor you getting thorn curls, dog-gone yer ! You needn't turn so red in the face, 'cause I can't see it for the paint. There ain't no use winkiu' at me with that glass eye o' yourn, 'cause I ain't goin' out'n here, now that's what's the matter with the p?rps. I don't care if you are twenty-eight years old, you 'ain't no boss o' mine, you old fo'd." That is all of the story that John re lated. He says he don't kuow how he got out of the scrape. The Honest Lawyer. "Are you the lawyer?" said a young man, hastily taking off his hat. "Yes, sir, that's my business; what can I do lor you ?" "Why something of a job, I reckon. The fact is, I have gotten into a little, trouble, and want a bit of help." And he took out a live dollar bill aud laid it on the table. The young lawyer made no motion to ward taking it. Client.? Why dou't you take it ? 1 don't call it pay. but to begin with?a kind of wedge?what do you call it? Lawyer.? Retetitiou fee, I presume you mean. Client.?Just so, and by your taking it you a.e my lawyer. So take it. Lawyer.?Not quite so fast, if you please. State your case, aud then 1 will tell you whither or uot I will take the ^r^^o^ii|*^^y-^^^^i^y^^U^sj^^y^^|y^IJV?. ply this: Last spring I was doing a lit tle busiuess by way of selling meat. So 1 bought a _)oke of oxen of old Major : Farnsworth. 1 was to have them for one hundred dollars. Lawyer ?Very well?what became of the oxen. Client.?Butchered and sold out, to be sure. Lawyer.?By you? Client.? Yes. Lawyer.?-Well, whole's the trouble? Client,?Why, I hey say that, as I on ly gave my note for them, 1 need not pay it. and 1 want you to help me to gel clear of if. Lawrcr.?How do you expect me to do it ? Client.?l'luiu as day. man ; just say, Heut lernen of the Jury, this young man was not of age when he g iVO Major Farusworih tho note, and, therefore, in ''mr, the n to is good for nothing--that's all! Lawyer -And was it really SO? Client.. - -Kxactly. Lawyer.?-How came Major Farns worth to let you have the oxen? Cii. nt.?Ob ! the godly old man never susp cted that I was under age. Lawyer.?-What did you get for the oxen iu selling them out ? Client. - -\\ by sumevt here between on< huudrcd aud thirty, nnd one hundred iiud forty dollars. They were noble fel lows. Lawyer And so you want me to help you cheat that honest old man out of these oxen, simply because the law, this human imperfection, g ives you the oppor tunity to do it! No, sir; put up your retention fee. 1 promised my dying mother never to do such a thing, and I will die lirst. And as for you. it I wan ted to help you to go to the State's pit s'.!!. I could t:.ke no SOUrSC so suro as to do what you oiler to pay me for doiug.? And, depend upon it. the lawyer who tines help you, will boyonr worse enemy.? Plead minority! No; go sir, aud pay for y< ttr oxen honestly- -and live and act on tbv. principle, that, let what will conie, ll'in tci/l he on honest man, A New Orleans widow of a week was wooed by an impulsive suitor, who, after obtaining her consent to a marriage in a fortnight, borrowed ton dollars, and deserted her She told bcr tale to the Recorder. "Well, exclaimed the surprised ofljoiui, "this is a little ahead of anything I ever heard of." Yes, sir," replied the lady, "it does so beat all, not that I care anything ab out ? !?'? ttiouey, but I don't like tttiag fooled." Cast a Lin? rent young nmu stood Uptjess W*^h?*|; #Vfcs anglors ou u bridge. He was tx??r BM<*..-1 dejected. At hint, approaching a P*c*??t Glied with wholesome looking flsTl1 W' eighth ? . ' :>Mwl~ "If now I hdd these^ w?^HM*|li? pv, I cotild sell them at ?fSsit buy food and lodgiiigs." "I will give you just as many and as good fish," said the ownCr, who oed to overhear his Words, If jjroift me a trifling favor." "And what is that?" asked" eagerly. * 1 :A "Only to tetid" td this lino till 1 cojitd, back, I wish to go on a short ?tjtpm. \ The proposal was gladly a<**BP^*f^ The old man was gone so long tliSC UW' young man ljcgrtn to bo irrrpntle*i? Meanwhile, baited hook, and the man lost all his depression iu the mcnt of pulling them in ; and, whew owner of the line returned he h*d< a largo number. Counting dtti them as many as were in the heated; - presenting them to the youiigf tftattj tlN^ old fisherman said : rtivfnm "I fulfill my promise from the %&,jflflq have caught, to teach you, whenever Jtfflt see others earning what you nee4.fi. waste no time in fruillcsa wbhlngTN? cast a line for yourself" ? mau that was up to a thing or twd once offered to bet that he could that this safe of the river was the side. II is challenge Was SOOtt at .?a and a bet of ten dollars made; whe?; pointing to the opposite short rtf Nw riVer, he shrewdly aSked : "Is not that one side of the Hiref f?s "Yes," was the immediate answer. "Agreed," said the man ; "and is ooi this the other side ?" "Yes,'' sal.dVthc other. "Then," snidethe man, "pay ale ftfee t ten dollar?^Jua*by yon- jtmn m is the other tide:" The dumbfounded antagonist, over* come by this profound logic, iili mediate ly paid the money. The Bourbon Prince and Miss Har?ei have again beeu married, This time bjf a Catholic clergymau at Jersey City. Eugenio's last dinner toilet was a inotmll't gray traitl over white satin, with narcissus ami diamonds in her plaited hair. Young lauics should never ebjeci td being kissed by an editor. They should, make every allowance for the freedom ox the prcsi. A l ankee doctor has discovered a neW tonic; it is extracted from sausage*, otto* called "sulphato of canine.u Do tho best you can whatever you, Un dertake. If you arc only a fticct-sWeep' er sweep your very best. It is unwise to worry about what not be helped and foolish to worry abottt what can be helped. Therefore Wor^e not at all. Tho ruin of uioet mcu dates from some idh hour. Occupation is an aruidr io the soul. Always refuse the advice which risii f ston gives. Most ol the shadows that croasourptftll through life are caused by our standing in our owri lighl. If we would have powerful miuds, t?e must think, if we would have faihf?l hearts, we must love; if wc would hate" strong mussolcs, we must labor. These include all that is Valuable l? life; A iihito garment appears Worse with slight soiling than do colord garments much sidled; so a little fault iu a good man attracts more attention than grave offcuses in bad mcu. A colored woman, while blackberry, ing. was run over aud killed by the Northeastern cars yu Sunddr last. w A largo tiger made ?n ap pea ran oe near the junotioo of Toby's Creek, above Co?. Brown's mill pond, in Barnwell District, ou Monday last. A joker lately doolared that a bUtfct man, by taking something from the breakfast table, recovered his sight. What did he take ? Ho took a tea-cup and saucer (saw, sir.) It Itt true of many persons* thai their memory is nothing but a row of hooks to hang up grudge* od. Not so mauy are the blades of gratis growing in the field as are the gift? sss? mercies of Ood to tho*e that hart e toil in which they eon grow. A wealthy aud eccentric Ohioau be* made a will disinheriting all his heirs, aud gWisg his fhrtuae to r~-uud su :'i>' ? tiru^ ?ry for oats."