Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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tr - ?" a HonruL yww of cottoh. Jfoiv Monet/ Can be Made at Even 9} Cents o Pound, by,Raising Your Own Grain und Provisions. ; i, _ u The last number oF the Financial Chronicle, under date of March 17, contains the following interesting article on thd "Cost of Cottou Production :* "Facte bearing uppn the industrial condition of the South haro an increased interest, sinco it has become apparent that our - Government is to leave the cotton States, for the future, free to regulato their own tk:- e * jl iiin, iur uuvious reasons, was nccessatily a condition precedent to auy genoIral prosperity in that section. Until,.in fact, this freedom everywhere exists, and is Used and not abused, a large party in the will belinve the South^onlj^heldriB^, I tioniae governments, and live in anarohy.? Capital aannot freely flow South until, by experiment it is proved that no such disposition exists?that life, property, individual rights, and liberty of opioion even, are just as sacred there as ia the North.' To onr own satisfaction this has been already provod; but it oanuot bo denied that a doubt with regard to it widely prevuilsa(the result of oauses we need net dwell upon) which nothing but the experiment will remove.? We hail, therefore, as the most promising indication of tho times, the disposition our government is showing to interfere no longer in the affairs of any State. At the present moment,-also, every eon^ditio.n in the Sooth appears to be favorable V for its growth and development. In an artiole on cotton manafaoture* (Chronicle, February 24), we stated facts iH\ioh showed the important poeitiou that section hplds on that question. But out object at this time was to spoak especially of the planting in-. ^ terest which has grown into a new life of ( . late years. The wasteful system of the past, , had becomo almost proverbial. With cot- 1 too at 30 cents & pound, the general res- j ponso was, there was no money in itj and, when it had fallen to 20 bankruptcy of tho - ^-^Mpuntiog interest was, of course, , _ ijypPfjIbectod result. And to many thesa r ? d vera diaa2?^ccn<lln8 PnoeB haTC ProTod t jj^^xBus. Iu fact, it is through these r the enforced economy sinoe I better basis has been reached. ' 00^ With the^^esptiou of a class of farmers f which have sroft to^t^ffnorthern portion t of the South Atlautic Sutoa, very few plan- I Un Vinvn mn^A mnnnu imftl - -. w4tMln t^e 1#lt , two years. But the turning point k?* n| t ]y come, and the result of the last cotton 1 crop is less debt than ever before. In fact,p the year has proved that cotton can be rais- i ed profitably in the Southern States at pre* ] ent priqes. In proof of this last statement, cno illus- ( Iration is as good as a thousand. A friend j who haft a plantation in south-westorn Oeor- i gia gives us the result of his year's work.? 1 He does not live on or near his plautation, but runs it with an overseer; of course a j very exponsivo and prodigal way. What i New England farm would pay expenses i * were the owner to live in Boston and let j his labor work it ? Our Georgia friend ( says that tho total cotton crop he raised the past season was 163 bales, weighing when i sold 82,176 pounds. He sold early in the season, and therefore did not get by ljc^l lb yhathe could have realised later. But W?s , after paying all the expenses of sale, commissions, ato., the net prooeeds of his crop -were 97,828.60, or about 9 Jo per pound.? The total cash eiruinMi for t.hn v?nr of every kind aud description, including taxes, five hundred dollars for overseer's wafees, labor, &o., amounted to 96,113". To this should be added ten per oent. on $2,000, the valfye^^ff QW^hules employed on the plantation?as experience shows that per (Centage about covers the wear?making the total cost of the crop $6,313. This divided by pound) sold gives 6.60c. as the actual east of the cotton per pound, leaving the net profit 2-90c. per pound, or a total profit of $2,610 60. Had tho crop been sold later, the profit would have been about $1,000 more. To really appreciate these results, we must remember that this plantation had a non-resident owner, and was worked entirely by an overseer Who was paid five hundred dollars.a yaar wages. Had the owner lived upon the place, ho could undoubtedly also have obtained the support of himself and famiv out of it, and havo saved the over TJ :J i i D?I 0 niigcs. uvaiuus, tl> IB BCttrUttiy necessary to say, thoro are numberless little econoj^ea which the watchful eye of the proprietor alone oan seeuro. It has run into a pfbrorb at the North that a man, to make anything out of a Arm, matt drive hl? own plough; meaning that the hoAwa of farming, perhaps more than all ethers, needs the proprietor's personal constant attention.? That he oan be mofe prodigal in the South we hare seen; but With the use of the same | oare, forethought, ingenuity aud economy which one ia ootnpelled to practise in New i i??rnmmt England, the profit indicated above could be easily doubted. There are throe conclusions apparent frpm the foregoing. First: That, even under present management, a man who will raise bis own corn and small grain can easily grow ootton at 91c per pound, and make a handsome profit on it; and with closer management, much better results could be obtained. Second: As on opening for the suiail capitalist, not afraid of work, uo where else can such promise be secured. This must present itself with peeuliar force to the man who is now grubbiug away his lifo on a Now England farm, with a bare living, and that a very modest ono, as the result.? Third : And finally these facts present in rolief the fading, still fading po:dtiou "other countries" are likely to hold on the quostion 1 of ootton production in the future; they i will be able to compete with us n?UW iu , Southern Breeders of Thorough- l bred Stock.?In view of the profits attach- , jog to the breeding of thoronghbre-t stock, it is surprising that there are so few South- * ro breeders. The report of the breeders 1 in tbo State of Tennessee is that all of the t surplus stook there has been taken by South- j crn purchasers. Thero should be in the j Souln a sufficont number of Southern broed- . ers to supply the Southern demand. The 1 loss, especially in cattle, from acclimation, 1 when purchased in a more Northern latitude, t is fearfully largo. This fatality deters many ( from investing, as it is not possible for South ern breeders to supply the demand. Rath- ^ cr than not purchase at all it is better that c this risk be taken and the basis secured for I thoroughbred herds. In the caso of horses, n sheep and swine, if proplfc care be used, j, thero is but little risk from this source.? No one should bo deterred from engaging injhe_brcediug of thoroughbred atoak from " an apprehension that there will bo do de- b mand for his stock. The Southern people t< are just boginning to appreciate the fact c that there is no profit in retting scrub-stock of any kind. As improved stock increases, tkc contrast will become so marked, as to douionstrac?**f "lg enter economy of the one over the other. equally profitable, a there is certainly more pleasure in owuiugand 0, breeding tho best strains ef horses, cattle, ?> tyock Journal ? TtlE^AlttfBR.?When a farmer can so aanagc his form as to make 'both ends of 80 he year meet,' oven if H'be with the moat sti igid economy, he ahould be contented with lis lot. If we take a survey of the busiiom men of our villages and cities, we find^ 141 naiouiy tnree or lour in a hundred realty" jfl i coaipeteucy for- old age. Then jh. uobappinefls of .ho? ?d ,V atrr, fail to support tjflg d ics rospectablv?tlv , . . di . , r, jrhauoe pangs and tortures . hat coiiatautl'- .. , 1 J?, u ha' no f ey<r *?'t- Thcso men may ' .eutly lead pleasant lives, the out- 1? hue world cuauot witness the ouiotions of i man who daily strains every financial jc, lerve to moet his notes falling due at the jg bank. The time between one and three j'clcck brings more anzkty to businessmen ihan all the farmers ol the Uuited States realize iu a lifetime. No, farmers, your lot tl is not a hard one. Your food may be plain ja ind the outs of your coats may not be us ^ those of the merchants of the day; but when you Ho upon your pillow your repose n is sound and sweet. The horrors of pro- Bl tested notes seldom keep you uwuke at uight; and in the morning, as you go around to feed your Hocks and view your crops that have visibly grown while you were in the ^ arms of Morpheus, you may take more " real enjoyment of life in oue hour than ti many city merchants and manufacturers do tl iu a year. Our adviee, therefore, is, be \ not discouraged. . The times may now bo t| hard, but you are'^romised 'seed time and harvest', to the end, and with hard labor D and judicious management, you couie out in the end victorious.?Rural Neto Yorker. a To Make A Cow Give Milk.?A wri- * ter who says that his cow gives all the milk * that is wanted iu a family of eight persons, I and from whioh was made 200 pouuds of y butter in the year; gives the following as the | treatment.. He says: If you desire to get'a large yield of rich milk, give your oow, three times a day, wa- v ttkr altrrkfltr warm all --c j J "" ??} ?" " ??v.? . bran has been stirred, at tho rate of one quart to two gallons of water. You will Q find, if you have not found thi* by easy / practice, that your cow will gain twenty fire j per cent, immediately under tho effect of it! She will beoomo so attached to the diet as to refuso to drink clear water unless . very thirsty, but this mess she will eat al- * most any time, and nsk for more. The J amount of this is an ordinary water pail full j each time, morning, noon and night. Your animal will then do her best at discounting the lacteal. Pour hundred pounds of butter is often obtained from good stock; and | instances are mentioned where the yield < was even at a higher figure.?Exchange. , ( Wdy Orow More Barley ??The , suooesafu il growth of barley is only possible , with good farming, just as large orops of ] roots need the best culture. To admit that An* A.n?.A? ? u: 1# ' vmw vpsiuw givn vhi ioj id auuuvviu^ uiuicfcu ? poor farmer. Our poor farmiog is the { roaaon why 7,000,000 bushels of barley are | imp9rted into the United States every year, a crop suhjeot to a^uob risk in marketing but there is no hitter grain for horses; 1 when ground it ia cxceUeut food for cows, 11 producing a rich flow of milk; it is proba- i bly the best food for poultry, and when barley meal is mixed with boiled potatoes and fed to pigs, it makes the very best flavored pork sad that, too, move rapidly than any other food we have used. With all these r advantages why not grow more barlty t?+ *? Our Farmers nre still agitating thd'fSnq law, or more property tho -'stock law," bj which the stock is to be fenced instead o the crops. The matter is diaoussed at Grange meetings, and there is a gpncrul dispositioi to make one more effort'to secure this la* for Anderson County. Man^ of the farmon who had been waiting 1or the passage ol such a law, evidently allowed their fencing to become dilapidated in tho last few years and recently have been obliged to undergo great expense to repair fences, in order tc mak; a crop this year. They have had an opportunity of judging as to the cost ol fcucing, and arc doubtless more tliua ever convinced that it is nn exorbitant tax upon their resources. Others who wore opposed m the application i>F such > law to Anderson County have become convinced that the :?u?i- -< *? iuwicdw vi mo inrmers generally dcxiand that such a great outlay for fencing srery yoar ought to be stopped, and that it s far cheaper and more satisfactory to fence ;he stock. We hare no doubt that a maority almost equal to Hampton's majority ast fall could be secured for a "stock law" u this County. Our atteutidft has been diectcd to this subject at the present tiuie by lie perusal of a letter from Mecklenburg bounty, N. C., where a stock Inw has been n oporation for several years. Mr. Robert Itevenson wrote a letter some time ago to lev. J. C. Chalmers, who is well known to lany of our citizens, asking for information a regard to the practical effect ot the law i North Carolina, und the following answer ras r^oeijqd. by him. It will.be jrepionered that the law originally applied to oDe >wnship, and it will bo seen that ittpraotial benefits are to be extended to the entire ounty : Ciiari.ottk, N. C., March 5th, 1877. Dear Sir : Mr. Chalmers having been way from home for a few days, and being onsiderably worried, requostcd me to reply Jo your letter, which was received it Saturday. . I will preface my reply by statiu" ^l??tftthe nofita acouring from the 'aw nre many and so great t> ^ lt ? v?rJ bard to ate all. r ' ^ ' 1 From iwroitj of ruil timber, Mr. G. ..chat it has added at least ons buniini red per coot. to the former value of our j * * * nds. V * 2. That tho farms can be cultivated with iwer hands, and thus at a less cost, lor aring the winter months, instead of fenc- I ig as formerly, wo can be prepuring our iud for planting. 3. That vegetation, whieh was before ept eaten down by cattle running at large, now permitted.to decompose on the land, lus cnrichiug it every year. 4. That the expense per capita to keep up le neighborhood, district or county fences, i not near so great as to keep up plantation tnces, and the laws being stringent we are ot bothered as before with mischievous Lock. 5. That farmers generally reduce the numer of their stock, aud hence have a Letter uality. Of course, we have to provide >od for them, but being confined in pasares they ruu loss, and takes less to feed hem, so we consider the expense uo greater. Vo are never bothered hunting strayed catle or hogs, which you know is very comiou under the old system. The above are ouly a few of tho benefits rising from the system, but wo think nough to convince any unprejudiced mind hat it is by far preferable to the old plan, lad we ten acres of forest laud to one in ultivation, we would be uuwilling to re urn 10 me oia system, in tact, 1 don't hink there is ouo who has tried the new, rould be willing under any circumtances to cturn to the old plan. The system is rapdly extending, and recently, by an act of iur Legislature, the whole of our county Mecklenburg) is allowed the benefit of the aw. Yours truly, L. M. MoALISTER. P. S.?I forgot to state a very important tcm, namely, that we can cultivato any ich piece oi land too small or iucouveuient o fence, and you can about make your >read on tho fence roW6.?Anderson Inelltgcncer. , Lemon Pudding.?Oue pint of fine >read crumbs, one quart of sweet milk, one up of sugar, yelks of two eggs; grated rind >f one lemon ; beat the yelks well; add the )tber ingredient*, with a little salt, pour into I woll-buttered pudding dish and bako until done. When tho pudding is cold beat the whites of the eggs to a stiff froth ; add one teacup of pulverized sugar and the juioe of oue lemon $ spread this on the pudAids; put it in the oven until it is a delicate brown. To be eaten with cream. Potato ^uddino.?Beet well together fourteen ounces of mushed potatoes (free frontlumpafr four pauses of biatsi, four ot sugar, five eggs, the grated rind of a small lemon, a pinch of salt; add a small teacui of sweet milk; pour tho mlfcHarsjofo a well buttered pudding dish; pour a little clari field butter en the and then sill plcnti of white sugar over it. Hake in a mode ate oven three-quarters of an hour. p. f On Ti' iin N'TyppirTTirr I&ailkoav T fiiipoh 9. ?Sou^'ffg-ourf<$dois bare noi f forgotten what fepifuLweather ,arc had las) Bight. The eleyieuUi were terily at war.? ' Dark and aogrp clouds shut out all light 1 from the firmament, pbovc, rendering tb< f night darken tho'extreme. The, wind wai blowing n perfect gale^ and the rain wai r pP9ur'B{?^Q torrcpts. Amid such a scene, laoawith such sitrmnn?ftt??r- ... ?* , IIO VUbOUt tUC > t'rnfii bound to Charleston moved out frotai , 'Florence, something Over an hour behind i 'the regular schedule time.' As sho rushed , rapidly forWa^d through the blackness ol the night, occasionally a sensation of droad or horror Would coine over your correspondent, and many of the terrible railroad dis' asters of the past would oomo vividly before his mind. 1 hero seemed also to be a feeling of unrest, of uneasiness, porvadioj^thq * $n 3e8$ed tern^/a"'to*wfieTher or not we would bo permitted to make a safe trip down to the '"City by the Sea." These gloomy forebodings of ours were not without foundation in roality. We wero running betweeu Lane's aud Saltors at or about a placo called "Dili?" when an accident occurred. The traiu was moving at the rate of twenty or twenty-five miles an hour, so said the engineer. Suddenly aud alarmingly there was a violent shock and n tremendous crash, and then for two or three minutes a succession of jolts and jars which canto near dashing the passengers from their scats. There was a little or no constcrnutiou among those on board, but the writer must admit that his feelings were any other than pleasant, for cither from imagination or ft-om fear, the coach seemed to be gradually Binking, and he did not know what tnomeDt would find the entire.train u complete wreck down among the timbers of some falleu^Jr' stlc. It was not. over, before the train was motionless, and then there was a gcncial rush to ascertain the couho of our coming so suddenly to a halt. The voice of the polite and oourtuous *- 1 " wiiwuvivi, V'l vam j *filO nUdlU SUUYiaitlg out among the disturbed clcmeuts, inquiring if nny one suffered injury. lie seemed to be lite any good conductor ought to be. under such circumstances, cxtrepxjr "?fcitous concerning those under' his charge.? Fx.(,lU-the engineer, Mr. Win. Jackson, the '"writer obtained the following points in connection with the cause and event of the disaster: lie was running, as stated above, at the rato of twenty or twenty-five miles an hour. The lireuian was throwing wood into the furnace, and light therofVoui prevented him (the engineer) from seeing distinctly any object ahead. Ho saw an object, however, and took it to be a white horse on the traok. Did not worry himself much, thinking that^he could oasilg hjannt- hi? "Great was his surprise aud 018may, however,' when the engine ran into a pine tree, which had fullcu directly across the track. 80 great was the momentum of the trniu that the body of the tree, beiug about ten inches in diameter, was cut off and the huge I rag| uieut was carried forward by the engine; not very far, however, before she leaped I wildly over it, tearing way her trucks and | burying herself in the embankment. The engine tras completely demolished. The express ntid baggage car followed closely on behind The car rushed upon the log, and the result was the trucks were lorn loose aud it was thrown upon its side 011 the opposite bunk from the engine. The express agent was lying upon a table, aud was thrown on the flo <r, sustaining no other injury but a simple scratch ou his face. The other cars did not leave the track, and it is thought that the prompt use of thoair breaks prevented them from becoming a complete wreck. When we~ consider the extern of tbe disaster and the imminent peril in which all wcro placed, it is really nliraculous that no one was hurt. The engineer escaped as by tho breadth of a hair. He did not leave his box, but wbeu the engine stopped, stepped out froui tho very jaws of douth. The fireman and wood-passer were thrown off, hut were not it^ured. As we left, Capt. Corric, with a large number of hands was clearing tho trpok. Trains will probably pass through this afternoon.?J u yen is, in Ncics aiul Courier'. A Duel on IIokbkuack.?New Orleans, March 9.?In Catahoula Parish, on Saturday, two Jives were sacrificed for a faithless woman. John Henry, colored, loved the wife of LoW Butcher, also colored, and in order to get tho husband out of the way invited him out to hunt. When in the woods, Henry lagged behind, nnd. when the oppormiiuy presemoa itscii, loagca a loan of buck-shot in Butcher's buck. Butcher, although mortally hurt., turned in his saddle to sco whethor ho had been ?hot through accident or design, when uoticing Ilcury, saarcely a yard distant, trying to reach his musket, which, after tho shooting, ho had laid across his saddle, tho truth burst upon him, and he knew that his only chance for M[fe lay in killing Ilenry. ucvcling his musket, Butcher fired just as Ilenry turned to flee, and sent a load of buck-shot through his back, causing death almost instantaneously. Butcher hastened home, which ho reached iu time to tall his story and die. Calmno to Churcii.?It appears by the following oztract from the Vecords of Springfield, Massachusetts, January 8, 1646, that the method of calling people to church adopted by the anoieut settlers of that town, was as follows: "It is snood by tbewfcatalioo with John i Matthews to beat the drum for the meet r ings for s year's space, St 10 of tho clock I on the lecture day?,-*ad ?t 9 o'clock on th< > Lord's days, nod -Wis beat it from Mr - Moxon'e to H.- SlddjAbom. and yo meet inga to begin an hdwwifUr, for which hii r payne, he ia to hawiw in wampum of ever family in tbo towoLor a peck of India; 'corn, if they hav^jW wampum." 9 c. ' *v * i *' Y011 kissed mo at tho gato last night, ' ' And mother heard the smack ; , *1 -i She ?sya it's naughty to do so, t So please to take it back. ( >, I cannot sco what linrm there is I , In such a thing, can you 7 j But mother seems so very wroth, f 1 ' rieose fake it back?now do. , t ' , It seoms to me quite natural 1 ^ For the lips to meet that way; t ( * But mother says it's very wrong, ^ Sotake it bock, 1 pray. I And come to think of it. I'm sure That several times 'twas done , a So, now, to make it right. be sure To lake back every one. ' e I would not have you think it's nic ; ? 1 1 do uot caro a mite; . _ Hut mother's so particular; c Please take (hem back to-night. ] ^ ^^TEXewTWATCH itBKTIlf OT^ 1 Tho New York Sun has a long account j of a negro watch moating somewhere in the j South and it coutaiua a most extraordinary c sermon, from which tho following extracts r are made: . I'll tefl you a little allegoric or speech by a de Bgger. Truth and Lie started out for ] to trabble. They stopped to diink at dc 8 ribbcr of Jordan. Truth was thinking no , evil, but lie pushed him, and he fell in and was drowned- Lie got out,' stole Truth's \ boots, and uieetin' a cullud pusBou who was rpotin' 'round whar he had no business, entered into him aud sot up his habitiou.? So Lie has lowed to dwell along wid cullud folks ever siuce. It's my bizness to pint t out dese tiugs to sense you of de tricks of de debble. Lie den sowed his seeds amoug us cullud folks. I axes you, ain't dis a fac'? Don't de produoe Correspond with the i seed? J Nto matter how hungry you gits, If you ^ IHrfirFlttn tne Iiord's gwinc to feed you.? i Dcre woh Daniel, a man who was sot agin , circus shows. De clowu cotch hiui prayin' out dor winder, and put him to starve in the lion's den. I)e angel oue day *?~-"fw Beelzebub carry in' soup to h>" ui was hocin' his era* r - *n?cr come a ndm 0( alou" ?"u,e- "e oeen 10 'own to *Duy some whiskey. De mule he seed the angel, and he kicked up and knocked Kbcnezer heels over head, and he drapt his jr whiskey bottle. Belzobub he seed de hot tie and picked up and put in his coat tail ? pocket. You aee, he found it, and dat make it hisscu. Do auael Lotchcd Belzebub by tc his wool on his WacT, and toted him off jist as he was, wid his tin bucket of soup and de bottle of whiskey and he drapt him in do den where Daniel was. gj I nebor heard dat Dunuel cot drunk, but . I Scriptcr tells us Noah who was shy of water, I kept a bottlo of Loosianncr rum under his t>?4l7 Wt>u?? o'orored pFeacfiSWeny iNoah wot d^casion of de brak folks iu dis wise :? Noah had one gal child named Cane Anny, gu a sassy, dissipated gal who would stcul her daddy's bottle wheu ho wos nsloep and drink his ruui. lie ketch her one day tipsy and p. makin'n spcctaclo of herself. De ole man cussed her good fashiou till she turned right black in dc iace. I dont pend much on dut, case it can't be proved Caue Ann's ^ head got kinky. No, my 'pinion is colored p. folks is dc most wonderful production of nature?dey growed jis so. I axes who uiado dem ? Wheu was ucy made, and w whar ? nobody answers. Dose p'ints can't ju be proved by dc Bible jdars nuflin in de Holy Writ about uegrocs, and dat circumstanco shows dey is a nation 'culia to dcre al own nations, au' Is'e nebbcr seed dat one ni was not proud of his color. Dc 'postlc saya hi to de 'pistle, 'Know thyself.' 1 'terprets p| dut, 'Be yc seekers after knowledge how d< you's so comically made in dc flesh.' kou nave all o??J ?t? tiiatnri on de sycamorc tree ; dat circumstance is a berry in ai tcrcstin' fac in dc bible. Dcrc was a very k small colored uian named Nigger Demos.? b He kept public house and done his own ai cooking, llo heard ouo of dc'ciples done a t ? ^ oorroweu a jinney ana was couiiu in great glory to preach. Nigger Demos thot if he could ouly get to sec dat good man de Mum- u bager he carried in de small of his back b would cease, llcarin folks a shoutin he v flung down his dish cloflf and went out to ^ sec dc 'ciple. but by dc 'caeion of his stumpy n legs lie couldct' see nuffln. A big sycamore was growin right before his cabin, so ho shiued up dur and looked down at de 'ciple 11 who weut ridiu' by and nebber seed Nigger 8 Dcuios. Poor Nigger Demos did cry !? He was so hurted, bis tears was so hot dey blistered de bark wharevcr dey touched.? Ono of dem tears hit de jinney on her back * and hurt her so bad she kieked up. Dat 0 'ciple den T88K3 up and se"ed Nigger Demos and said : Couie down poor fellow! I'll stop at your house and take a glass of your 'simmon beer. Nigger Demos was proud of do houor. Sycamores been blistered ever since. Now, we must bury our heads in ti do dirt and pray long and fervently. I r hopo tny endeavors to givo you de true light a to carry you froo de next year will bring ? forth fruits without iusects. Tho Dord bo wid you all. T - - T L i _ _1 uAUuiiTr.u.? naugnicr very oucn Bnown tho bright aide of a man. It brings out his happier nature, and shows of what sort s of stuff ho is made. Somehow we fell as if we never thoroughly knew a man until we hear him laugh. We do not feol "at ] , home" with him till then. Wo do not i mean a mere snigger, but a good hearty , round laugh. The solemn, sober visage, ' like a Sunday dress, tells nothing of the i real maf>. He may be very foolish, or very . profound, very cross or very jolly. Let us h hear Jhiin laugh, afld we eau deoipher him > at onoe, and tell how his heart bests. , . .??. ? An Illinois minister announced on bis I Sunday night bulletin, "Tho funeral of Judas Iscariot." To which nn obliging fob f low added : "Friends of tho dovoeased are f 'cordially invited " Wt SB I v lions of Fred. Douglass, ss United States marshal of the District of (^obiknbis, saj* : 'The nomination is not a popular onawith my class. The colored pebple do aot ap?rove of it, for they any that while Douglass issames to be a representative of their race ie is "too high-toned," aud prefers associating with white people, where he can do it, o those of his own color. The citizens ;enernlly of the District do not approve of t, as they giy that so important an offico hould not be given to hiui. The lawyers ire very much disgusted over it, and one of he District judges said that Douglass was utircly uufit for such a position ; that it re [uired very fine business capacities, in which ic was entirely deficient, as shown by hfs niserublc management of tho sffaira of the ''reedmaa'a Hank. It is stated very posiLvaly that although Praudtat ilyjca expressed his purpose to do something Tery undsome for Mr. Douglass, he uever would lave nominated him as marshal if that oflitcr was expected to act as master of cerenonies at tho White Ilcuse, as was always he case until the latter part of Gen. Grant,s dministration. Whou the,name of Mr. )ouglass was first suggested for the narshaihip it was thought that one of his duties rould be to attend at the Presidential levees nd receptions, and introduce the guests.? I confidential friend of President Ilayes remarked : ''Do you think tho President rill have a nigger to introduce people to bis rife?" Afterwards it was found that this ras uot necessarily a part of the official duies of the marshal, as it was mentioned hat for several years Gen. Babcock and thcrs of the immediate household of the Resident has acted as grand high chamberiin. It was theretore understood that Mr PnugLa ts to nave no connection with the Vhite House. Two senators requested .'resident llaycs to withdraw "atT'tTiio notion' oL th. aljr from Mississippi, who resides ith Douglass, urges him to stick. The inrshalship is said to be worth about $10, 00." A bmmit Sunday School Pupil.? he superintendent of a Sunday school, havig organized a splcudid treat for his pulYw j v\lOU-\lt H ilUIC \AJ LV/UUVW OVM*v ith their evident appreciation of tlio fruit. "Have you enjoyed these strawberries, -day ?"he asked. "Yes, sir ; yes, sir," came from all sides. "Well, children, if you hnd sceu these srrics growing in my fgarden, and had ipped in through the gate without my ave, and picked them, would they have stfcd as good as now ?" "Why not?" asked the gratified master, iticipating the virtuous answer obviously iggested. ".Because," said one of the little flock, hen we shouldn't have had the sugar and cam with 'em. A commercial exchange says : "Ilogs are ill." We never thought hogs were very larp. When one breaks into a cabbage itch you may chase it fourteen hundred uics around the lot, and it wiM try to crawl trough cvory throe inch crack in the fencs ithout once seeing the hole it made te got i. A mother admonishing her son, a lad lout seven years of age, told him he should sver put off till to-morrow anything that t could do to-day. The little urchin relied, "Then, mother, let's eat the remainsr of the plum-pudding to-night!" A little darkey slipped off of a steep roof aa.Uv1"1 1 ';fioqd Lord, ketch mo! etch me, good Lord:" </u?v %v-? bin roeches caught on a nail and hald him, ud he cried out, "Nebber mind, good Lord j nail doue. cotch me." Mrs Loss who is lecturing in Boston just ow, tells the girls that marriage is the usiuess of their lives. According to that iew of the case there are now over 30,000 Jsssachusctts maids who arc out of employncn(| The iuventer of the "self buttoning glove" s missing. It is thought he has been assasinatcd by enraged young men. What a gain it would be in these hard iuies if a mirror could bo invented ^which rould make an old bonnet look like a new no. Rice, McLure & Co. A NNOUNCK that they lave received a full c\_ line of FALL AND WINTER GOODS, 0 which they respectfully call the nttcntion of .urchasers. These godds have been carefully elected, purchased at low prices, and are offered n the most reasonable terms. The attention of the Ladies is especially diected to the 1RESS GOODS, 8/i AWLS, CLOAKS, TRIMMINGS. MILLINERY GOODS, 1ILK NECK TIES. nurrLlHUS, //OBIKBy, GLOVES AND FANCY ARTI< LES, Displayed by RIO?, McLURB & CO Oct. 16 41 tf New Stook of Prints at FOSTER & WILKINS . Jan. 7 1 If Impm? Tour Stock. ^ The fine, thorough bred Horse, ENOKEF-, is one of the handsomest enimala in the Stale, and his cells are sought after by all good judges of Horse flesh, Ilis serrioes con be had at $26 for the season Those wishing to raise really fine stock should n breed from * %