Keowee courier. (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, February 02, 1893, Image 1
TO THINE OWN SELF BE TRUE AND IT MUST FOLLOW AS THE NIGHT THE DAY, THOU CANS'T NOT THEN BE FALSE TO ANY MAN.
BY THOMPSON/, SMTH & JA YNES. WAIdHALLA, SOUTH CAKOIJXA, FEBRUARY 2, 1893. VOLUME XLIV.-NO. 5.
DESOTO FLOUR cannot be beat,
The bread it makes is white and sweet ;
It is the Highest Patent made
SCHUMACHER sells this fancy grade.
MARVEL FLOUR is a Straight Patent,
Can't be excelled by any combatant ;
OVEN LIFTER is a aood Flour sure,
But Marvel is better and costs no more.
DAMON FLOUR is avery good grade,
Called Choice Family, a name self-made ;
Is white and cheaper than bolted meal,
Of this grade Schumacher sells a great
deal.
DONT FORGET
The Charleston House.
GOODS ALWAYS NEK ADD FGESD < ?
1 t?<?spoft fully.
O. H. Schumacher.
GOODS DELIVERED FREE.
Januarv 26. lsOS.
<;.><><] Health.
Straighten the Itack.
One of the best ways to keep good < me of the greatest and most com-!
health is nol to think or worry much : mon deformities of the day, observes
aboat it. If you feel strong and j a writer in the Boston Transcript, is
well, don't imagine that some insidi- [ one that with care and attention can
ons. disease may be secretly attack--! be remedied. It is the most round
ing your constitution. Kat and drink shouldered or stooping habit. Many
what you desire, as long as if agrees of the most natural ligures show this
with you. Your stomach knows tendency to stoop, while in the"nar-1
pretty well what it can digest. row chested it is marked to a painful
Take all the sleep you can get. but degree. And yet, by raising one's
remember that the necessary amount self leisurely upon the toes in a per
vades greatly for different persons; pendicular position several times a
Some must sleep at least nine
thrive on
yours<
while othe
don?t cheat
really need.
The "midnight oil"
li of
nours^ day this deformity could be easily
six. < >nly rectified. To do. this properly one
w hat you must be in a perfectly upright posi
tion, the arms dropping at the side,
a terribly the heels well together and the toes
expensive, illuminant to burn, either forming a" :;;;^ie of fortv-ti ve degrees,
for p?ir?">se> of labor or study-. The rise should be made very slowly
Avoid sudden changes of tempera- ami from the balls of both feet, and
.. t. y>.:\ cannot avotd them, the descent should be accomplished
you can guard against them Uv ha the same wav, without swaying
always wearing flannel undercloth- the body ont of its perpendicular line,
ing. The exercise is not an easy one, but
Al ways treat a common cold with may be accomplished bv perseverance
great respect. Ninty-nine times out and patience: It can be modified,
of a hundred it will get well anyway; too, by standing first on one leg, then
but the. hundredth cold it neglected, on t he other. .Inflating and raising
may lead to bronchitis, pneumonia j the chest at the same time is a part
or consumption.^. It ts best to take of the exercise, and if "persevered in
no such chances. will .ultimately show an increased
Don't trie with patent medicines, chest measurement, development of
if-you are sick enough *o need anyrlung power; and perfectly straight
medicine at all, beyond he simple l and erect figure,
?household remidies famihar to alli I_
you are sick enough to need the at
tendance of t physician.
A change of occupation is usually
better'.han a total cessation of activi
ty. ?By all means take as-much
exorcise as you can. and be in the
open aie as muchas possible. < >ut
'door life is *the natura! condition of
mankind, and the more one can 'nave
.of it thc better. The practice must
not be carrietbto extremes, however.
Th#rfc- are many davs when one is
Laughter.
In his ^?'Problems of Health," Dr.
Greene says that there is not the
remotest corner or little inlet of the
minute blood vessels of the human
body that does not feel some wave
let from the convulsions occasioned
by good, hearty laughter. The life
principle of the central man is shaken
to the innermost depths, sending new
'? fido's of life and strength to the sur
n+ftcM ttvtter orr irfa warm comfort- - . . n ? i- . .
,?- .... . race, thus materially tending to in
abje, wen ventilated bouse than try- ' , , ,., . -, ? ,
. ,. . . .-, sure good health to the persons who
sag to talfe outdoor exercise m a mid- . -, P tl ? T, ? ,
? . , , , indulge therein. The blood- moves
winter storm, or under n ..-ule sun. ? .-,
,, -V ,. - , more rapidly, and eonvevs a different
rresh air, sunlight, good and . . . n .u ' ? .u i
. . impression to all the organs ot the
sufficient food, pure water, out- , . - ?. i
j } ,, bode, as it visits them on the particu
door exercise, temperance m all , " ' - . , ^. r
\w ? ??" j I-, v ' -.- lar mystic journey when the amn is
trr.rigs, and a yCneertul disposition, , rJ r . ?. , * . -.,
^ 2t"3 r** r . r . . laughing from what it does at other
^re the chiet remedies m natures. .. - =V, ... ,
, times. ? or this reason every good,
pbarmacona-ia. and are wort4i irfore , , . - , . , J 0 . V
f. ,,-T sj .? , _ - , hearty laugii in which a person in
to an all the drugs and medicines of , , . . ?, . ,
? i, i c ' \r - dulges, tends to lengthen his lite,
the shops.-XFopular Science Jj[eics.\ - . -. -, ? JJ-'
11 j conveying, .as it docs, new and dis
t -: tinct stimulus to the vital forces.
# ' <>>-_*_
Throughout all Spanish America
" ne young man is considered thor
f!? h i ono^b" educated until he can speak
ll^c ; at leas* two languages besides his
own. In-Chili, French and German
ilurtfnl Members.
r?iblHfcader.J
You will fiid in everv
pet)pie wh?.mnst be coaxed and pat
ted and petted and coddled just as j are learned ^ H . now
you would a spoikd cl.ild, rf yon beamingWfeshiofft? study Eng
hold them to "the Church, and even
fhen tbeyvwili pout and Md<?' away
and refuse tb; 4? anything except
according to their own "sweet" wills.
Spoiled by seKishiiess. . _ .
lish.
Frussian education is more thor
ough than that of any other country.
Every child is in school from five to
fourteen years of age. Parents must
^^t^^ms have been found ip i obey the law, pay a fine, or go to
?rater. {priscn.
ADONIS.
[For thc KEOWEK COTXSTEB.]
His real name was William Camp
bell, but he was called Adonis, or
more commonly Ad, for the sake of
brevity, on account of his personal
appearance.
Our hero was the only son of
Peggy Campbell,an old widow. 'She
said she was of noble Scottish descent,
being the great- -oat-granddaughter
of the chief cook in the house Of
John MacCullum Moore, the great
Duke of Argyll. -Nobody knew nor
cared where they came from; in fact,
no one ever thought of that. They
were "permanent fixtures" in the
settlement and had been from time
immemorial. They, or rather Dame
Peggy, earned a scanty livelihood by
doing odd jobs for the neighbors and
by dyeing and weaving, arts in wliich
Peggy was an expert.
Our hen) and his mother lived in a
little tumble-down cabin on their
own farm, a tract of six acres, situated
high up on the side of a very poor
and stony hill, whose soi! would
hardly sprout a cow pea.
When this old shanty finally came
tumbling about their ears one blustry
March day, the farm, or plantation,
as Ad called it, was abandoned and
they took up their abode wherever
they found a deserted cabin.
Ln appearance our hero was very
remarkable. Ile stood six feet two
in his stockings and weighed one
hundred and twenty pounds. His
legs were merely "pipe stems," and
both seemed to "come out at one
hole," as the neighbors said. His
arms were long and dangling and his
hands very red and skinny. His long
nose was sharp and thin, his eyes
blue and watery, and his head wasj
crowned with a mat of very-bushy
yellow hair. His beard . was scam
indeed, or "one in a hill," as people
said. Ile invariably wore a very tall
and badly battered beaver and faded
green frock coat,both of which looked
as if they might have seen service in
the Revolution.
' He had eight of the meanest,
mangiest curs you ever saw, and they
invariably followed at his heels
wherever he went. Thc sight was
half amusing, half pitiful, on a cold,
windy day, to see him coming, his
lon?;, thin legs dangling rather than
stepping, his arms swinging awk
wardly and his tattered coat-tails
flopping gleefully in the wind, with
his many canine friends stepping upon
Iiis h^-' '.
Ad md his curs were sure to put
in their appearance at hog-killings,
corn-shuckings and other rural fes
tivities. He seemed to "scent the
bat!le from afar," but he never
appeared until near . meal-time, andi
no one ever s.;iw bim help with the
work. However, he was always in
the front rank at the table, whether
invited or not, and his appetite was
something remarkable. Indeed, such
were the quantities of "good'cheer"
consumed by Ad that one involun
tarily wondered where it all went to,
unless his legs and number- twelve
feet were hollow.
Ad was very mealy-mouthed and
a famous liar; and while the afore
said edibles rapidly disappeared the
mellowest lies imaginable rolled off
his tongue, ile told tales ahout what
he had seen, heard and done and
what crops he used to make on "my
plantation" that would put "Arabian
Nights" to shame.
But to%come to our story propcr.j
Ad -nis believed that there was a hid
den treasure that he was destined to
find, ile said that, when a small
boy, the spirit of an Indian chief
appeared to him in a dream and told
him this. So wherever he went his ;
eves were bent upon thc ground, and
every odd nook and corner was
searched for the hidden treasure.
Now, about this time there lived in
that particular locality a young lady
named Olympia W ashburn e, the
daughter of a wealthy planter. '
When our story opened she had
just returned from boarding school, j
where sh?- mid taken on an excessive)
degree of polished sentimentality.
She affected extremely refined man
ners and conversation. She would
walk from one side of a crowded
room to the other to get to a door to
take a drink of water, and when she
talked it was merely a continuous
series of ohs, (dis, oh mys, did you
evers, and yes indeeds. Notwith
standing her faults Miss Olympia had j
numerous beaux and was a very
popular young lady generally, for her j
father owned four thousand acres of j
fine land and scores of slaves. But i
the war caine on and her father, j
Charles Washburne, mortgaged alli
his property to raise funds with which
to equip a regiment, of which he took
command.
During the war Adonis somehow
became acquainted with Olympia and
he fell deeply in love with her. At
ii rsl she scorned him ami guyed him
unmercifully, as did every one else.
But Ad was not to be thus slightly
put off. Ile could not take a hint.
He told Miss Olympia the story of
the treasure it was Iiis destiny to dis
cover, and as it was exactly suited to
her romantic nature, well schooled
by reading -The Life of Captain
Kidd," and so forth, finally she became
interested in him; and when Olym
pia's favorite canary died he wrote
such a touching poem in memory of
the event that she was completely
carried away. From this time onward
?she regarded Adonis as a genius,
\ merely hampered by poverty.
At last the war was over; but in
the meantime Col. Washburne was
killed and Mrs. Washburne died of
a broken heart. All the Colonel's
property was swept away and all the
grand estate disappeared like a fog
before a July sun, and Olympia's
numerous suitors vanished simultar
neously with the property, only faster,
if possible.
But there remained one as constant
and devoted as ever-poor Ad. Of
course they were the laughing stock
of the community, now that they
were both poor, but neither paid any
attention to what any one said. .
"Time wore on," as the novelists
say, and great was tbe sensation cre
ated when it was rumored tbat Olym
pia had fallen heir to a large sum of
money, which v-a bachelor uncle of
hers had made in. Peru and bequeathed
to her at his death. When it was
ascertained thai the rumor was cor
rect suitors again flocked around
Olympia, and she found herself again
the belle of that section.
Olympia spurned* these new suit
ors, however, and continued to smile
upon Adonis.
Within a month after they were
certain that the money was indeed
theirs they were married. A year
passed, and the legal proceedings
having been terminated, fifty thou
sand dollars in gold were paid to
.Air. William Campbell, ns thc agent
of Mrs. William Campbell.
On the same day Lady Campbell
presented her lord with a male heir,
and his joy was unbounded.
The spirit of the old Indian again
appeared to William and told him
that Olympia and her inheritance
was his, the treasure that was prom
ised him.
A great charge now came over
both William and Olympia. With
the money they purchased and equip
ped the Washburne plantation and ;
commenced planting. The transfer- j
mation was complete. William soon j
became one of the wealthiest and
most progressive planters in the coun- j
try, and Mrs. Campbell was now j
regarded as a model lady and house- j
wife.
"Years rolled by" and still Mr.
Campbell's wealth increased ; and i
with the appetite it was always his !
good fortune to possess, and his now ;
plentifully supplied table, his girth j
did likewise. Ile had now become a
very rotund old patriarch, tipping
the beam at two hundred and fifty
pounds. Mrs. Campbell was now a
plump, well-preserved matron, greatly
remown?d as a housekeeper.
"So, as the years roUe?Tby, they
continued to live, highly respected
and prosperous'1 and, of course, happy.
JEFF PERKINS.
ADVANCEMENT OF THE AGE.
[For thc KJEOWEE COURIER. 1
One of the latest overpowering
evidences of the celerity of progress
in the mechanical arts is the umul~\
tum in parvo" "JE'JPluribus Unwn" \
grand combination, rocking and fan
nine chair. This great invention is '
almost automatic in its operation.
The "-Modus Operandi "1 is so perfect
that the operator has absolutely
nothing to do but send the butcher's
and baker's collectors away from the
door satisfied with an "I owe you ;"
then pick up the latest pictorial
volume of the popular "H?rtalo Bill"
series, seat himself in the rocker and
gently sway himself back and forth
with the aid of a lever power, gene- '
rated by the pressure of the toe of.
j bis patent leather boot against the!
1 Kr?ssels carpet, while the breeze
from the wind generating apparatus
above softly whistles "Home Sweet'
Hume'' through his long flowing
"whiskaws."
Now, in the ever increasing, already !
longated list of improvements in the
art of invention, there will appear tn
the near future an invention designed
lo relieve man of the necessity of
laming and dressing himself in the
moraine. With this invention man
will simply have to consign himself
to the tender mercies of this machine,
which will probably be known as the
" ?A Capite ad Calcem' Toilet Per
former,'' which, by simply pressing a,
button, thereby turning on an electric
current, will ?ift the subject from the I
bed, give him a "Cleanliness-is-next-;
to-Godliness" bath, dress him, ar
range his hair, adjust his tie, put a i
four-ply professional hine on his
shoes and place a cigarette between
his lips, while the prayerful words of
his morning invocation will ascend
heavenward from the devout lips of
a phonograph attachment.
Already in projection for our fu
ture enjoyment is a new model tele- i
phone, by which one may keep his
room and enjoy the play at a theater
five miles distant, the conversations
being distinctly heard, while the,
entire action of the play will be re- j
fleeted in a large French plate mir
ror, placed near the telephone, while '
the streugth of every hit, with the
denizens of the third gallery, will be
faithfully recorded by an indicator
upon a graduated scale dial attached
to the [?hone.
Another great and invaluable in
vention of the near future will be the
"Automatic typewriter and mailer.''
which, by simply starting the pendu- j
lum of a clock work connection, will j
type-write any epistle dictated to it, j
fold the sheet, place in an envelope,
seal it, address the same and stamp
it ready for mailing. This will prob
ably be the invention of some pru
dent and thoughtful wife whose hus
band's business required the services
of two or three female stenographers.
.Sometime since Mr. Edison con
ceived the great, grand and g! orious
i idea of utilizing a certain iron moun
tain of huge bulk as a kind of dry
battery to furnish the current for an
inter-etherial telephone from "Terra"
to "Sol" via "Luna'' and "Mars," no
ground connections ; but Mr. Edison
for some, no doubt, good reason lias
called off his mental forces for awhile.
Probably he is waiting the success of
co-projectors on "Sol" in their efforts
to raise by subscription, or otherwise,
a sufficient amount.for the completion
of the plant.
This great inter-planetary tele
phone will be an 'invaluable conven
ience of the first magnitude. There
will be no limit to its multiple bene
fits. "Uncle Sam's" weather bea
reau will be enabled to communient2
with the associated bureaus of
"Sol" and thereby will be in a" posi
tion to furnish any kind of weather
desired by fickle humanity, imported
directly, by telephone, from "Sol"
free of duty and at a nominal price, j
For instance, a regular June day is
wanted for the celebration of Christ
mas or New Year's day, application
is made to the "weather bureau of
"Uncle Sam," who will at once tele
I phone the superintendec, of the
weather bureau on "Sol" who will
at once, without awaiting the action
of a "Solar" congress or local legis
lature, order the wicks of the heat
generating lamrs to be turned up to
sueh degree as may be required by
the soliciting "terrestiai". bureau.
When this line becomes thoroughly
established it will furnisli employ
ment to a great mary electricians in
keeping thc wires in good order. It
has not yet been, decided what kind
of poles will be selected for the sup
port ot the lines. This project should
have thc hearty and Ijnar.ciaily mate
rial co-operation of all enterprising
citizens, as, no doubt, in time we
will be in direct communication with
the inhabitants of all the members of
the "Solar" system, with a central
office at the sun, replete with a sofii
cient number of thc "Stronger Auto
matic Telephone Exchange Switch
ing Machines." When these lines
aro completed our neighbors of Mars
will be enabled to communicate with
us withoi t the great expense of those
signal tires, which they have been
practicing so many years, regardless
of non-reciprocity on the part of their
"tcrrestial" neighbors. The ladies
will, n<> doubt, hail thc completion of
this grand system of telephouery
with pleasure, as they will be in a
position to adopt the latest styles in
furs as worn by the fair ladies of
Neptune; also, will bo enabled to get
these infallible, unparalleled receipts
for cosmetic compos'Lions for which
Venus is so famous, and for the effi
ciency of which, the divine beauty
of the shining countenance of Venus,
after ber morning toilette, is suffi
cient substantiation.
Thus the advancement of thc age
is something wonderful to behold.
It is written. "Lei lhere be light and
there was light also electric light
in overpowering abundance, for the
lightnings have become as a cat-o
nine-tails in the hands of man.
VlRGILIUS RuSTICCS.
SOFTENING 0? M BRAIN.
[Dr. Henry 8. Williams, in thc North
American Koview.J
( >f all tho diseases that menace the
race, only a few are absolutely fatal.
Indeed, there is but one common
disease thal invariably brings its
victims speedily to tbe grave. This
most ruthless of maladies is that
terrible form of insanity technically
called general paresis or paretic
dementia, and known to the layman
as "softening of the brain." Its
unvarying history entitles it to pre
cedence over consumption, cancer,
Bright's disease; in short, places it
peerless in bad pre-eminence. And
as if this were not enough, its malig
nity is emphasized by the way in
which it juggles with its victim be
fore it extinguishes his life. It
changes his personality, dethrones
reason, almost, eliminates the mind,
and steadily weakening the body,
leaves toward the last a mere skeletal,
vegetative being scarce recognizable
as the vestige of "its former self;
unknowing, unfeeling, mindless, to
his friends at once a tearful memory
and a terrible objective presence.
Finally death comes in a form hor
rible enough to be the lining climax
of so awful a disease. Of course it
is not to be understood thal the
stages of this disease follow an abso
lutely iixed routine. The abnormal
is everywhere only a perversion of
thc normal, and until we have two
organisms exactly alike we shall
never see two identical cases of any
disease. Still, thc essential symp
toms of typical cases of paresis are
singularly uniform. It seems para
doxical that the patient who during
the carly stage thinks himself lost
forever, will a few weeks or months
later, win n thc fatal disease has more
firmly fixed its hold, declare himself
absolu lily well-better, stronger
than eve- in his life before-and
laugh to scorn anyone who contra
dicts him. During the early stage
of his disease he will not admit a ray
of hope, because he feels hopeless.
Later OH, though his "body is weak and
every faculty and function is failing,
he cannot bc persuaded that such is
the case,'because he feels well. But
why, it may be asked, does the pa
tient experience feelings so at vari
ance with the facts ? Usually a person
feels ill because he is ill, or well be
cause he is well ; why is it otherwise
with the paretic? Now, the "whys"
f things physiological are not
always easy to make out; never
theless, it happens that we are
able to give at least a proximate
solution of this seeming anomaly.
Everyone knows that the brain is in
some way indissolubly connected
with the mind. It appears further
that the activity of the mind depends,
whatever the link of connection, upon
the circulation of the blood in the
brain. Under normal conditions,
the blood supply is regulated and
momentarily changed in accordance
with impressions sent from the outer
world. But in the brain of the
paretic, the mechanism that should
regulate the .blood supply is out of or
der. During the early stage, a free
flow of blood is not permitted,
lb ncc the mind is persistently slug
gish and depressed. Tell the patient
that he has fallen heir to a fortune ;
no responsive thrill goes through
his mind. Entreat him to cheer up ;
he cannot. Later-on, through a dif
ferent maladjustment"of the controll
ing mechanism, the brain of the pare
tic is permanently surcharged with
blood. A perpetual sense of well
being then encompasses him. Tell
him that he is ill ; he laughs at you.
Assure him that he is doomed to an
early grave ; he replies, "I will live a
century." He feels, as he never felt
before, the lust and strength of youth.
The circulation in his "brain is persis
tantly overactive; his ideas corre
spond. But overactivity means
excessive wear on the mechanism of
thc organism, just as on an inanimate
machine. Hence the brain in .which
this abnormal activity prevails wears
out rapidly. Its cells degenerate
and become useless. At last it is so
wasted that its functionings produce
only the most rudimentary mental
states. Then the tissues become so
weakened that small .blood vessels
burst, lacerating the brain, and bring
ing on those convulsions which are
"so painful a feature of the disease,
and which finally terminate the pa
tient's life. Post Ynorten examination
will-show that the brain of the pare
tic may not be ?'softened,T bat- that
its cells and other tissues are every
where more or less degenerated 01
decayed. It is inconceivable Lhat
these wasted tissues could bo re
placed with normal ones ; hence it
cannot be even hoped that an ad
vanced case of paresis will ever be
cured. But of course there is a time
in the history of every case when
decay is only incipient. At the
disease in this stage preventive
medicine may hope some day to aim
its shafts successfully. So much for
the disease, paresis. Now as to its
cause. It can be epitomized in two
words: excessive action. Paresis is
a protest of nature against abuse of
function. Whatever act tends to
bring too great or too continuous
strain upon the blood vessels of the
brain, tends to weaken them and
thus invites paresis. All mental
overactivity brings such a strain.
But few of us are gifted with work
ing enthusiasm thal will ever menace
our minds.. Still, there are cases,
doubtless, in wich mental overwork
of a strictly legitimate kind has been
an active factor in paving the way
for paresis. Business stress and
worry are far more common factors.
Alcohol is a yet more potent acces
sory. But in the vast majority of
cases, though these accessory causes,
have their effect, the chief causes of
paresis are habits and excesses that
I cannot properly nore than hint
at here. It will now be plain why
paresis is a disease of civilizations
sac! commentary though th.at be ;
more common with men than with
women; more prevalent in the city
! than in country ; and one that is
j claiming a larger coterie of victims
y r by year.
CHE SNOLLYf'OSTER.
The celebrated Georgia politician
\ and humorist, Col. Ham, has added a
{ new word to the English language
I "snollygoster." This is thc way he
gives the history of this wonderful
word :
'.Along in the forties there lived
up-in the mountains of Rahun county,
Ga., a man named John? Kelly. Ile
had a limited education and an itch
for office. Ile ran for everything,
going up by regular graduation from
Constable to Clerk of the Court and :
j was defeated every time, but nothing
daunted tried at the next election for
the next highest office. In L8-?8 it
came time for him t ? be a candidate
for representative in the Legislature.
As there was at the time some talk
of war with England over the
Niagara incident, he announced as I
?his platform that it was the duty of
j the President to seize all -the roads
I leading to Liverpool so as to prevent
j a sait famine in case of war. As
j everybody recognized the necessitj
for plenty of salt, it was a taking
j slogan and Kelly was getting on
? swimmingly.
j "Kelly's opponent was a tall, gaunt
I mountaineer named Jonas Gaines.!
Ile was Justice of the Peace, and to
use his own language 'know'ed all the j
law what wasn't tore out of the
I books.' Ile had a wonderful flow of
; language, using all the big words he j
had ever heard and coining many
more without any reference to what
they might mean, and yet, as such a
man naturally would, now and then
said a really good thing. Superior
Court coming on in the very heat
and burden of the canvass, a number
of the lawyers gathered at the county
seat from all over the Circuit, and
the bright idea struck them of bring
ing about a joint debate between
Kelly and < raines.
'.Kelly hail the opening -\i>? I made
a long, and as one of the lawyers de
scribed it,'a very able-bodied speech.*
Ile fumed and foamed and fretted, j
and worked hissait platform for all
it was worth and sat down amid
great cheering. Then up ro-.- Gaines,
his tall form towering higb in air,
and working his long arms like the
sails of a windmill and in a voice
that could be heard half a mile, pro
ceeded, as he expressed, to 'take the
hide off Kelly in flakes as big as a
hound's ears.' He 'skinned him
belly-wise up and back-wise down,'
dissected his record, enumerated his
varions vices, and among other
things, said if there is anything on i
top side of earth that makes me mad,
it's to see a snollygoster of a feller a
continually a sidwipin' aroun' after
the orthography of a little offis what
he kain't never git, and hain't got
sense enough to till it if he could git
it.' Finally he reached thesalt ques
tion and yelled :
'"Liverpool, hell ! North Carolina
salt is a durned sight saltier, and
there's a dozen roads to the works.'
The effect can be better imagined
than described. Kelly and his fol
lowers fled the scene, and Gaines was
triumphantly elected.
"And so to this humble, but pic
turesque source, was the Georgia
orator indebted for the won! that
has now by common consent come
to stand for thc Kelly class of dema
gogic politicians. It is one of the
curious specimens of native origi
nality which now and then comes to
enrich our language and lill a long
felt want of something todo the sub
ject justice."
Twelve United States Senators
have been elected from various States,
as follows: Edward Murphy, Jr.,
(Democrat) of New York; Joseph
R. Hawley, (Republican) of Con
necticut ; m Henry Cabot Lodge, ( I Re
publican) of Massachusetts ; Eugene
Hale, (Republican) of Maine ; George
Gray, (Democrat) of Delaware ; Mat
thew Quay, (Republican) of Pennsyl
vania; F. M. Coekrell, (Democrat)
of Missouri- C. K. Davis, (Republi
can) of Minnesota; David Tarpie,
(Democrat) of Indiana; Stephen M.
White, (Democrat) of California;
Win. B. Bat#, (Democrat) of Ten
nessee; Francis B. Stockbridge,
(Republican) of Michigan. Thc
Democrats have made gains in the
election of Mr. Edward Murphy, of
New York, and Mr. Stephen M.
White-, of California. The Republi
cans have made no gains.
"Never- mind, dearest," cried a girl
who had been cast off by her. family on
marrying a ne'er-do-well; "with you I
can be content tb live on? bread and wa
ter," "Yes, beloved," was the earnest
reply. "And if you'll just get the bread
PU skirmish around and try to earn the
water."
I>^Vir) TO POLICY HOLDERS,
>i32,000;000.00. .
PAID US DIVIDENDS,
$9,500,000.00.
"THE PHOENIX POLICY/
ABSOLUTE GUARANTEES-NO ESTIMATES.
Agc: 35. $10,000. 20 Payment Life.
Cost per year, : $286.30. Cost for 10 years, : $2,863.00.
O tirantees at End. of Ten Years :
Eirst Option-Extended Insurance for 10 years and 7 mont.
longer for. ? 10,000
Second Option-Paid up Policy - - - *4,S60
Third Option-Cash value - - - - ^ - $1,980
JPoiU'th Option-Loan at 6 per cent - - - $1,100
At end of 10 years, if First Option is taken, the policy holder gets 26
years and 7 months Insurance, for $10,000, at a net cost of $2,863.00, which
is at the rate of less than $11.00 per $1,000 (guaranteed) per year.
If Second Option, the Paid up Policy is in excess of cost, $?,997.
If Third Option, the net cost of Insurance for $10,000, for ten years, is
$883:00, or $8.83 per $1,000 per year.
Guarantees at End of Twenty Years ;
Cost for 20 Years : : : $5,726.
First Option-Paid up Policy .... $10,000
Second Option-Cash value - - - * $4^980
Third Option-Loan at G per cent - - - $2,700
Options are given for every year in body of Policy in plain figures
from 3 years upwards. Policy Incontestable after two years.
W. M. HUTSON, Gen. Agt.,
Columbia, S. G.
W. A. KAY, Dist. Agt.,
Greenville, S. C.
THE PHOENIX MUTUAL LIFE
INSURANCE COMPANY,
OF HARTFORD, CONN.
February "J, 1893.
The two Rolers.
In these <lays when the Bible is
discredited, its authority rejected,
or lowered to a literary level, the
following is appropri?t-' especially
for the young:
"The Bible is so strict android
fashioned," said a young niau to a
graybaired friend, who was advis
ing him to study God's word, if he
would learn how to live. "There are
plenty of books written nowadays
that are moral enough in their
teaching. and do not bind one down
as the Bible."
Tho old merchant turned to his
desk and took out two rulers, one of
which was slightly bent. With each
of these he ruled a line and silently
handed the ruled paper to his com
panion.
"Well," said the lad, "what do you
mean ?"
"One line is not straight and true,
is it? When you mark out your,
path in life, do not take a crook
ruler."
How it Works iu Athens.
The new liquor dispensary law for
South Carolina continues to be the
leading topic of discussion. With a
view to finding out how the law
works where it has been tried, a gen
tleman of Sumter recently wrote to j
Athens, Ga., and received the follow- \
ing reply from Hon. Henry C. Tack,
Mayoi of that city, under date of
January 10, I*!'-'!. " Ile says :
".My reply Will necessarily be gen
I eral in its nature. Hut, generally
speaking, I would say that t he dis
pensary has more than sustained
itself, in the opinion of the citizens
whf> formed its establishment in our
midst. For the regulation of the
whiskey traffic in a city no larger
than ours (with 10,000 people) I think
it solves the question. It is incom
parably superior to bar-rooms, and as
a prohibitionist from the beginning
iu our county, I am sure that it is
preferable to prohibition, so-called.
I am not an enthusiast on the Sub- !
jeer, but for the country towns and
small cities of the State, I think it
solves thf v?xed whiskey problem,
and will sc .1 bc adopted in all the
places named, as a solution of the
problem. . .
"As a source of revenue, is sur
passes the license. The net profits
of our dispensary,for the first twelve
month exceeded *10,000, or $1 per
capita, as our Alliance friends would
put it.
. "And I would say further that 'law
and order' under the present system
is fully as good as it. was unc?er the
prohibition regime, if not better." * '
'The average expenses of. the stu
dents at Yale,Jast year were: Fresh
man, $786^96 ; sophomores, $831.34 ;
juniors, . ?883.11 ; \ seniors, 4919,70.
The largest expense reported was
$2,90&V ? - *
For Everybody in General.
. For Epworth Leaguers in particu
lar as the case may he, the Chris
tian Standard gives this advice:
"Everybody has moods and tenses,
so everybody will.be interested in
the following prescriptions:
"If you are impatient, sit down
quietly and have a talk with Job.
"If von are strong-headed, view
Moses.'
KI? you are getting weak-kneed,
look at Elijah.
"If there is no song in your heart,
listen to David.
"If vou are a policy man, read
Daniel'.
"If you are getting sordid; spend
awhile with Isaiah.
"If chilly, get the beloved disciple
Lo put his arms around vou.
-If your faith is below par, read
Paul. *
"If you are getting lazy, watch
Tames.
"If you are loosing sight of the
future, climb up to Revelation and
get a glimpse of the promise?! land."
The Voice has tin- following as to
the contents of whiskey drains: "A
minister in New York, says the Chi
cago Inter- Ocean, visited a number
of the best liquor stores in his neigh
borhood, .uni brought pint samples
of their best gin, whiskey, port wine,
etc. In the analysis of the 'pure
Holland gin' were found neutral
spirits, rotton corn, juniper berrie-:,
turpentine, and vitriol. Thefineold
hand-made Kentucky whiskey con
tained neutral spirits, glycerine, sul
phate of zinc, chromic acid, creosote,
unstacked lime, and fusel oil; and
the rare old port had licorice, zinc,
mercury, antimony, muriatic acid,
and-alum. The man who takes
mixed or straight drinks should
make no complaints against the ordi
nary microbe, after dissipating with
these tissues .and brain-destroying
elements."
Young lawyer: "I really feel p'roud
at the way I have. come out of lay
first case. It was a claim against the
government, you know, and-T won
and secured a settlement in leis rban
a week. What do you think of that-?"'
Old Lawyer : "? think you jvr,sted
a grand opportunity. A Juwcver.of
experience would have made that
case last a life time, and it would have
been the foundation' of an independ
ent fortune." . :
Thirty young women students have
entered Yale this fall. The. Yale
males*, ar* said to be in quite a* stew
about it.
"What do you mean by thrashing
your boy without provocation ?ft
"Well, yon s??e, a busy man like me
must discipline'his children when he
happens to have time."