The Newberry herald. (Newberry, S.C.) 1865-1884, February 17, 1875, Image 1
A Family Companion, Devoted to Literature, Miscellany, News, Agriculture, Markets, &c.
Vol. XI. WEDNESDAY MORNING, FEBRUARY 17, 1875. No. 7.
THE HERALDI
1s PUBLZBEED
EVEnY WEMMESAY MORNLNG2
At Newberry C. K..
BY THOS, Fe GRENERKERt
Editor and Proprietor.
Ters,$250per JXXfUM,
Invariay in AUUMe
g-The gae sstopped at the expiration of
time for which i. is Pa&M.
87* The RA* denotes expbsation of sub
beriptiola.
cntt~
QUESTIONING THE NEW
YEAR.
New Year, I would that I might read
Your purpose through!
Iwyouftir promise mead
To meis trae:
But while your flttery I receive,
In trnth I hardly dare believe
Or Mast in you.
For ah! the Year whose hoary head
Now Heth low,
Came in with smiles like yours widespread,
TwelTe months ago.
And *h! 61-hOMe 816 rich aud Mae,
That wth hsproises sofair
*Ue help mesow I
'1gatbered naugbt.cae
.N*A&&,Ue"sUr6,met my claim,
-Tho'loufg I songlit.
aerw e glad-my heartand l
ipm at last this Ol3d Yeax die.I
For all he brougbt.t
And4j 4;'y -oe '.hst 416 y;u hqd?
what d a yonr bng?
What blessings are for me enr-olLd?
41t at Son"s.?sing?
ftMdarto day- t
Still, Hope is king!
-Fom TEm ALD12mfor February.
VA&M gMeent Pima( poetryis froM the
fi; Jr . ELPlatI6 the lector of Oilvazy
Churck, in Lmuisville.
'Oh, he shall warm, sit here lit
le boy,' and Rachel pushed a chair
n front of the stove; she then gave
iim a piece of bread and meat.
Marian watched these arrange
nents and then glided from the
-oom; wIen she returned she had
t primer, with the first rudiments
>f spelling and reading. Going to
:he boy she said:
'Little boy here is a book that
rou can learn to read from better
han a piece of paper. Do you
mow you- letters?'
'Some of them, but not all. I
iever had anybody to teach me.
just learned myself but, oh, I want
;o read sobsdly.'
Marian sat down leside him, and
>egan to teach- him his letters.
;he was so busily occupied in this
vork that she did not see her 'mo
her enter the room nor hear Rach
1 explain about the boy; and she
new not that-hbr mother stood for
ome time behind them listening
o her noble child teaching the!
>eggar boy his letters.
There were but few that he had
iot already learned himself, and it
vas not long before Marian had the
atsifaction of hearing him repeat
dis alphabet.
When he arose to go he thanked
achel for her kindness and offered
&arian her book.
'No, I don't want it,' she said,
[ have given it to you to learn to
ead from. Won't you tell me your
ame?'
'Jimmie,' he replied.
'I will not forget you, Jimmie,
rou must always remember Marian
layes,' was the little girl's fare
vell.
Louise Gardner and M a r i a n
layes were playmates and friends.
Cheir dwellings joined, and almost
ery hour of the day they were to
ether for they attended the same
;chool. These two children were
rery differently dispositioned, and
rery differently brought up. Lou
se was proud and haughty. Poverty
n her eyes was a disgrace and a
-rime, and she thought nothing too
evere for the poor sufferer. These
rews she learned from her mother.
Irs. Gardner moved in one exclu
ive circle-bon ton of New York.
Without its precincts she never
rentured,for all others were beneath
ier. Louise, taught to mingle with
o children excepting those of her
nother's friends, was growing up
yelieving herself even better than
iLey.
The teaching that Marian Hayes
eceived was totally different from
his. Mrs. Hayes was acknowl
dged by Mrs. Gardner as one of
1er particular friends ; yet though
she moved among that circle, was
ar from being one of them. Her
loctrine was the text her little girl
iad used : 'The rich and the poor
neet together, and the Lord is the
daker of them all.' Thus she taught
darian, there was no distinction
; to wealth and position ; that tlie
iistinction was in worth alone.
She taught her to reverence age,
mnd to pity the poor and destitute ;
md that 'pleasant words were as
sweet as honey comb, sweet to the
oul,' a little kindness was better
aan money. Marian learned the
esson well, and was ever ready to
ispense her gentle words to gli,
whether they were wealthy and in
uential, or ragged and indigent as
he boy she had that cold morning
efriended.
A. gay.and brilliant throng were
ssembled in the city of Washing
Eon. Congress was in session, and
the hotels were crowded with
strangers. It was an evening party.
The brilliantly lighted rooms were1
illed with youth and beauty.
Standing near one of the doors
were two young ladies, L asily en
gaged in conversing together. The
lder of the two suddenly exclaim
'Oh, Marian, have you seen Mr.
Hamilton, the new member from
'No, but I have heard a great
deal about him.'
'Oh, I want to see him so badly.
Mrs. N- is going to introduce
him to us. I wish she would make
haste, I have no patience.'
'Don't speak so, Louise, I wish
you not be so trifling,' said Marion.
A singular smile played around
the mouth.of a tall, handsome gen
tleman who was standing near the
girls ; and as he passed them he
scanned them very closely. In a
short time Mrs. N- came up
with Mr. Hamilton, the new mem
ber, and presented him- to Miss
Gardner and Miss Hayes. As they
were conversing together, Mr. Ham
ilton said:
'Ladies, we have met before.'
Bun Louie and Marian declared
ing. I will quote one that may re
call it to your memory. 'The rich
and the poor meet together, and
the Lord is the Maker of them all."
The rich blood tinged the cheeks
of Marian but Louise still. declared
herself ignorant as before. Mr.
Hamilton glanced for a moment at
Marian, then turning to Louise, he
said:
'Long years ago, a little boy,
ragged and dirty seated himself up
on the- steps of a stately dwelling
on Fifth Avenue, New York, and
was there busily engaged trying to
read from a bit of paper, when his
attention was attracted by two lit
tle girls, richly dressed. The eldest
of the two particularly attracted
him, for she was as beautiful as an
angel; but as they came near to him,
she lifted up her hand and exclaim
ed:
'Boy, what are you doing there '
The boy answered that he .was
trying to read. The child of affin
ence derided him, and said she had
heard of intellect in rags, and he
was the very personification of it.
Hfer companion's answer was, that
'the rich and the poor shall meet to
gether, and the Lord is the Maker of
them all.' The elder girl drove the
boy away from the steps, but the
younger one took him into her
dwelling and warmed and fed him
there. When they parted the little
girl said, 'you must not forget
Marian Hayes.' And, Miss Hayes, he
never has forgotten you. That rag
ged, dirty boy is now before you la
dies, as Mr. Hamilton, the Member
of Congress; and allow me, Miss
Gardner, to tender my than.--s to
you for the kind treatment of i
boy.'
Overwhelmed w it h confusion,
Louise knew not what t3 say or do.
In pity for her, Mr. Hamilton
rose and turning to Marian, said:
"I will see you again, Miss Hayes,'
and he left them.
Louise would not stay in the city
where she daily met with Mr. Ham
ilton, and in a few days returned
to New York, leaving Marian with
the consciousness of having done
nothing to be ashamed of, and en
joying the society of distinguished
Congressmen.
Ma.rian and Mr. Hamilton were
walking together one evening, when
the latter drew from his bosom an
old and well-worn primer and hand
ed it to Marian.
'From this,' he said, the man who
is so distinguished here, first learn
ed to read. Do you recognize the
book ?'
Marian trembled, and did not
raise her eyes, when she saw the
well-remembered book. Mr. Ham.
ilton took her hand and said :
'Mar-ian, Jimmie has never forgot
ten you. Since the day you were
so kind to him and give him this
book, his life has had one great aim,
and that was to attain to greatness,
and in after years to meet that
ministering angel who was the
sweetener of my days of poverty.
When I left your house with this
book, I returned to my humble
home ten times happier, and as
siduously set to work to learn to
read. My mother was an invalid,
and ere long I learned well enough
to read to her.
'When my mother died I found
good friends, and was adopted by a
gentleman in W----. As his son
I have been educated. A year ago
e died and left his property to me.
Of all the pleasant memories of my
boyhood, the one connected with
you is the dearest. I have kept
this primer next to my heart, and
dwelt upon,.the hope of again meet
ing the giver. I have met her. I
see all my imagination pictured,
and I ask if the dear hand that gave
this book cannot be3 mine forever ?'
Louise fet deeper grief than ever
whnl Marian told her she was to
become the wife of Mr. Han.1ilton,
the poor boy whom she once spurn
ed from her door, and derisivcly
called 'intellect in rags.' But she
learned a severe lesson, and one
that soon changed the whole cur
rent of her life. For a while she
shunned Mr. Hamilton ; but by per
severing kindness he made her easy
in his presence, and she became the
acknowedged friend of the Con
grssman and his noble wife.
Years have passod since then, and
Louise is training up a family of
ittle ones; but she is teaching them
to despise not intellect in rags, but
to be guided by Marian's text:
'The rich and the poor meet to
gether, and the Lord is the Maker
of them all'
The Chicago Ti,nes puts the sol
emn coniundrumn: ''How can we
escpe tire ?" A Now York paper
auwr "The Gospel offers you
every encouragemen t, but perhaps
jejn hold' is to j et out of
[From the Galveston News.]
A STRANGE STORY.
ONE OF LAFITTE'S MEEN DEScRIBES THE
BATTLE OF NEW ORLEAN.--AARON
BURR'S DAUGHTER CAPTURED BY Pi
RATES AND BURIED ON GALVESTON
ISLAD.
In your issue of the 25th of Decem
ber, appears an account of an old
cannon brought up from the bottom
of the bay by the scoop of the
dredgeboat. In the same paper
you give several conjectual histories
of the piece of ordnance, none of
which, as I happen to know, have
any degree of truth, except that the
cannon in question once formed
part cf the armament of the fleet of
Lafitte-the brave and good Lafitte.
From the cut and descripion given
of it in your paper I recognize it as
an old acquaintance.
And, sirs, it has a history, and a
most eventful, but brief one, and
could it but speak would tell its
own tale in language far more elo
quent than I can. I am an old man
now-"in the sere and yellow leaf.'
I was many years ago a member
of the company of the brave Lafitte;
I am old now, close on to ninety
years, and though some weak of
limb and dim of sight, yet have re
membrance of persons and events
of long ago remarkably vivid. An
old man lives in the past entirely;
he is fond of talking of the brave
days of his youth, of the brave men
who lived then, of their deeds ol
daring, of their generosity, and o
himself. -I may, sirs, ,grow tedious
and prosy, but permit me to tell
my story in my own way-the story
of the cannon-for, sirs, it has a
story, and one of great interest.
You will remember that a short
time before the great battle of New
Orleans, the great and brave Gen.
Andrew Jackson induced our cap
tain, the brave Lafitte, to help him
fight the British. I well remembei
the day, when a small vessel-a
schooner appeared off the bar o:
what is now called Galveston island.
She displayed the American flag,
fired a gun and then lowering heI
national flag, ran a white flag to her
peak. That meant a parley. La
fitte scanned the new corner closely
with his glass for some minutes,
and then ordering his four-oared gig,
pulled to the schooner. I was theIr
young and lusty, and accounted the
best stroke in our navy, and was
one of the gig's crew. Lafitte
boarded the schooner, and he and a
young American o ifi c e r, whose
name I afterwards learned was Don.
nelson-Lieut. Donnelson, of Gen
Jackson's staff-descended into the
cabin. There they remained at
hour or more, and then they came
out. As Lafitte stepped over the
schooner's side to get into his gig,
he said to Donnelson, "Tell Gen.
Jackson I will be with him. He
may rely on me for at least eighty
skilled artillerists."
The name of the schooner was th<
"John Hancock," and a neat clippe:
she was. We pulled back to th4
fort, Lafitte saying not a word, bui
pulling in his quick, nervous waj
his mustache; proved to us he wa:
planning some desperate work.
That night the schooner weighed
and left. The next morning ther<
was a grand council held at the fort
All this occurred a long, long tim!
ago-nearly sixty years ago ! Mor
Dieu ! how time flys ! It seems ba
yesterday. Well, sirs, I don't wvan1
to be tedious, but an old man if
naturally garrulous. He has s<
much to live over in thought. So
sirs, bear with me patiently.
I don't know what happened ii
the council, but two days after thre<
of our best vessels, with the flowe:
of our filibusters, sailed for Nes
Orleans, under the command of th<
BRAvE LAFITTE HIMSELF.
Chauvet, his right bower, being
with him. After four days' sail w
entered the Mississippi river, and
soon anchored off New Orleans,
little below the city. I was then
gunner on board the ten-gun brig
Vengeance, commanded by Chauvet
a brave but cruel man, When th<
British forces under Packenham ap~
proached the city, in January, 1815
we ran up and anchored above th<
city. All was bustle and prepara
tion. We took out most of the can
non and placed them in position ii
the works General Jackson ha4
hastily thrown up at Chalmette, and
one hundred and twenty picked ar
tilerists, or gunners, with all ou:
officers, headed by the brave Lafitti
in person, manned them.
On the 8th day of January, th<
British opened a terrible fire on ui
with their field pieces, but as w
wre sa behindr1 earthwork
her out distinctly. She was a pilot
boat built schooner, and was armed;
two guns amid-ships and a swivel
forward. We ran about 200 cables'
length distant from her, and Chau
vet, mounting the railing, hailed
her. She replied that she was the
American privateer schooner Pa
triot, bound from Georgetown,
Soubh Carolina, to New York, and
ran up the Stars and Stripes. Chau
vet, instead of displaying the Vene
zuelan flag, under which we usu
ally sailed, flung to the breeze
the terrible black flag, and fired a
broadside into her. Mon .Dieu ! the
Yankees were no cowards, and they
replied with their starboard gun
and their swivel. And well ainded
they were, too, for we had four
men killed and some six wounded
by the discharge, besides having
our rigging badly cut up. After a
sharp but brief conflict we carried
her by boarding, and every soul was
either put to the sword, or
MADE FOOD FOR SHARKS
in our own peculiar way. Ali! but
didn't my pet, my beauty-my
little six-pounder, do good work !
Never a shot missed. She behaved
splendidly. And didn't I pet and
kiss her when the fight was over
and the prize secured. A prize in
deed the Patriot proved. She had
been cruising for some months, de
predating upon British commerce,
and was returning to New York to
divide the plunder.
After we had disposed of the dead
and living privateermen, Chauvet
descended into the cabin, and pret
ty soon he called out in an angry
tone for myself and mate to go to
him. We descended and found
him in the cabin, confronted by a
beautiful woman, who held an
empty bottle in her hand, with
which she had struck Chauvet, who
had attempted, it seems, to make
too free with her. He ordered us
to tie her hand and foot and convey
her on board the Vengeance and
place her in his cabin. We obeyed
hm; but she fought us, and did
all she could to jump overboard.
After gutting the captured ves
sel, and transferring the valuables
to the Vengeance, we fired her, and
then headed for Galveston island.
Just after we entered the gulf,
and while flying the Venezuelan flag,
we had a terrible fight with a Span
ish cruiser, and being badly hulled
and cut up, and after losing one
third of our crew (ahb! the brave
fellows-how g all an tly they
fought!), we took advantage of a
foggy night to draw off, and under
full press of canvass made for the is
land. Upon our arrival we found
the Vengeance so badly damaged
that it became necessary to remove
from her her armament and all valu
ables, and sent her to our navy
yard for repairs.
We had gotten everything off
but three or four guns, my little
six-pounder among the number,
when one night, .through the infer
nal carelessness of the Watchman,
the Vengeance caught fire and
burned to the water's edge, and in a
few hours after sank in the channel
between our town, on the east end
of Galveston island, and our navy
yard, which was about half a mile
to the west.
Ah, how my heart bled to lose my
little pet-my little six-pounder. I
grieved over its loss even as 1
grieved over the death of one of my
comrades. 0, little beauty, I little
hoped ever to hear of you again.
Yes, sirs, that cannon described in
your paper, is my lost pet. I know
her. Have I not handled her ? Don't
I know every mark on her? The
marks you describe near the cross
were made by a cursed Spanish
shot in our engagement in the gulf.
If I were not so old and so feeble
I would travel to Galveston to see
once more my little pet.
The woman captured on the pri
vateer died a few days after our ar
rival in Galveston. She was a very
handsome woman, and I afterwards
learned was the daughter of a dis
tinguished American. Her cloth
ing-which was of the finest mate
rial-was marked "T. A." and she
had a golden locket containing a
portrait of a beautiful boy. On the
locket were the words, "To my
wife, Theodlosia." She was buried
on the island, a few hundred yards
to the es.st of the old fort on the
poit. It was whispered among
the men that Chauvet had killed
her, because she would not yield to
his wishes.
I hope, sirs, you will excuse the
prosy talk of an old man. I am
nearing my end-have much to re
pent of. But when I saw the de
scription in your paper of my lost
pet, I felt compelled to write you
the truth about her. My old com
rades, who may be living-and
days, and I may be gone. There
are but few of my old comrades
living. Those that are will remem
ber me when they read the name I i
bore in the brave days of Lafitte. I
They will remember the best gun- t
ner Lafitte and Chauvet ever had,
the best oarsman, and the one I
whom they nick-named "l'Ecolier."
If you publish this in your paper, V
please correct the English and put 0
some polish to my rough sentences,
for I have some pride yet in main- c
taining the reputation for scholar- I
ship I enjoyed among the brave
filibusters of our loved Lafitte. f'
Adieu, messieurs,
Jw BAPTISTE CALLIsTRE.
Calcasizu, La., Dec. 28, 1874. r
ROADSIDE COLLOQUY.
a
"And so, Squire, you don't take a
country paper."
"No, Major; I get the city paper T
on much better terms, and so I take
a couple of them."
"But, Squire, the country papers t
are often a great convenience. The
more we encourage them the better
the editors can make them."
"Why, I don't know of any con
venience they are to me."
"The farm you sold last fall was
advertised in one of them, and c
thereby you obtained a customer, a
did you not?" t
"Very true, Major, but I paid
three dollars for it."
"And you made much more than
three dollars by it. Now if the
neighbors had not maintained and
kept it ready for use you, would be
without the means to advertise
your property.
"But Ith I saw your daugh
ter's marraige in one of those pa
pers. Did that cost you anything."
"No, but-"
"And your brothers' death was
thus published, with a long obituary
notice. And the destruction of
your neighbor Brigg's house by fire.
You know these things are exag
gerated till the authentic accounts
of the newspaper set them right."
"Yes, yes, but these things are
news to the reader. They cause the
people to take the paper."
"No, no, Squire Grudge, not if
all were like you. Now I tell you the
day will come when some one will 1
write a very eulogy of your life and
character, and the printer will put
it in type with a heavy black line
over it, and with all your riches
this will be done for as a grave is
given to a pauper.1
"Your wealth, liberality, and all
such things will be spoken of,but the1
printer's boy, as he spells the words1
in arranging the types of these sav
ings will remark of you:
"Poor, mean devil, he is even
sponging an obituary ! Good morn
ing, Squire."
A Co-OPERATIVE HOUSEHOLD.
I have heard, writes a London1
correspondent, an amusing account3
of the failure of a recent attempt
to establish a confederated home in I
London. Five families possessing
small incomes united in the estab
lishment of a common home. A
large house in the Bloomsbury re
gion was taken for the purpose,
and the arrangements for the regu
lation of the household were made
wigi the utmost care and precision.
There was to be a common dining
room, in which all the meals of
the household were to be taken;
and each family had a set of rooms,
which it was to furnish and ar
range as suited its own conveni
ence. There was to be one cook
for the whole household, and a
couple of servants to do the other
work. The experiment was com
menced, and for the first day or
two matters went well enough.
Before a week had passed, how
ever, it becamo evident that to
govern a confederated home would
be nearly as difficult as to manage
an Irish Parliament. The five
families could never agree upon
what they should eat and drink.
The dinner especially was a stand
ing subject of dispute, and the con~
sequence was that the kitchen be
came a scene of constant wrang
ling between the unfortunate cook
and her five mistresses. Five
bells would frequently be ringing
at the same time, and one family
would compiain that they were
neglected and that another was
receiving undue attention. Then
the children of the different fami
lies would quarrel, and of course
each mamma was sure that her
darlings were not the cause of the
disturbance. Before a few weeks
had passed the confederated home
became what the person who told
me the storg called a confedera
ted discord, and had to be broken
A newly-married man up-town
naannnh ormemorv that
was the genius of the fight! How
his French blood boiled at the sight
of a red coat! Les Anglaisperfid.s!
Jackson, tall and gaunt, was mov
ing his men, occasionally observing
the British line with his glass, and
taming anon to encourage his Ten
nesseeans and Kentuckians. How
impatient those rifleman appeared !
Bat Jackson's orders were, "Re
serve your fire, men, for close quar
ters!"
Pretty soon the cannonading ceas
ed, and then we could see the long
and solid line of British advancing,
first at a slow, steady pace, then a
double quick. When they were
within three hundred yards of our
works, Lafitte,springing upon a gun
carriage, thundered out, "FmE 1"
i Sacre Bleul What a sheet of
flame leaps forth from our guns!
Then Jackson, with a clear ringing
voice that could be heard above the
roar of battle, cried out: "Make
every shot tell. Fire low, my boys!"
Crack! crack ! went the unerring
rifles. Our guns roared. Grape,
canister and round shot went
crashing through the advancing
ranks. The foe reeled under the
fire. For an instant they faltered
-for an instant only-then with
closed ranks they again advanced,
under a most withering and deadly
fire. ' A general officer leads them.
He mounts the parapet, waving his
sword and cheering on his men.
Lafitte springs toward him, pistol
in hand. A flash-Packenham falls
shot through the heart. The waver,
and then retreat, in great confusion
and disorder, to the shelter of their
war vessels. Lafitte was for charg
ing them, but Jackson, cool
and collected, said "no." Our
forces were too small, and bayonets
were scarce; so we remained be
hind our breast-works poured vol
leys of grape into them until they
were out of range. Mon Dieu! how
my old blood is stirred at these re
membrances.
Well, about the gun! Patience,
aessieurs, I am coming to the gun.
Well, sir, after the British fleet had
sailed down the river, we went over
the battle-field, picking up the plun
der. Among many other things left
in their hasty departure the British
left a six-pounder, a field-piece,
stack in the mire, with one wheel
shattered. It was a beauty ; al
most new. The date of its casting
was in-1813.
After remaining in New Orleans
a few days, we prepared for our de
parture. Among other things given
Lafitte by Gen. Jackson was this
six-pounder (the identical cannon
described in your paper of 25th
December), to replace one of ours
that
HAD BURsT IN THE BATTLE.
It was placed on our bridge, the
Vengeance, and ever after formed
part of her armament.
When we returned to Galveston,
Lafitte called us all together-men
and officers-and told us that he
was determined to give up follow
ing the sea, and would leave us ;
that if we desired, we could choose
a new leader. We were sorry to
hear this, for we all loved our in
trepid and generous Lafitte, and en
deavored to shake his resolution.
But he was firm, and so we went
into an election, and Ohauvet, La
fitte's first lieutenant, was chosen
our leader. Shortly after, Lafitte
-bade us adieu, and taking one ship,
the Chiquita, sailed for South
America. I remained behind on
the island with Chauvet. Chauvet
was not the leader Lafitte was. He
liked dash and enterprise ; he was
cross, cruel, harsh, avaricious and
overbearing.- We feared him, but
did not love him as we did Lafitte.
SWell,one day Chauvet tor~.- command
of the Vengeance, the fastest vessel
and best armed of our navy, and
sailed into the gulf for a cruise.
SWe stopped at one of the Florida
Keys, and, while there, Chauvet re
ceived some dispatches, the con
tents of which seemed to give him
intense pleasure. He immediate
ly weighed anchor and run into the
Atlantic, heading for Hatteras.
After we got off Hatteras, a man
was kept day and night aloft, on
the look-out, with orders to re
port every sail he saw. One day, I
think it was sometime in the month
of March or Apr-il, 1815,the man aloft
reported a strange sail on our lar
board. Chauvet seized his glass,
and after viewing the stranger for
some time, ordered the men piped
to quarters, and the decks cleared
for action. I was then the gunner
of the same identical six-pounder
captured at New Orleans. AhI! but
she was a beauty. I never missed
with her.
We kept the stranger in sight un
til dark, and then, under press of
sail, began to crawl upon her. She
HE FINALLY WENT.
An old man recently appeared
efore the Detroit and Lansing
tailroad ticket window at the Cen
ral depot, and asked:
"What you charge for a ticket to
jansinr."
"Two-sixty, sir," replied the agent,
,etting his thumb and reaching
ut for the money.
"Two dollar and zixty cents I" ex
aimed the stranger, pulling his
ead out of the window.
"Yes, sir, that is the regular
ire.
'-Then I sthays here by Detroit
rty years !" said the man, getting
ed in the face. "I haf never seen
ie sush'n swindle as dat 1"
"Two sixty is the regular fare,
nd you will have to pay it if yon
o," replied the agent.
"I shust gef you two dollar und
Lo more," said the stranger.
' No; can't do it."
"Vell, den I sthays mit Detroit
ill I dies," growled the old man,
nd he went away and walked
round the depot. He expected to
>e called back as he left the win
low, as a man is often called back
o "take it along" when he has been
hafing with a clothing dealer.
uch an event did not occur, and,
fer a few minutes, the old man re
rned and called out:
"Vell, I gef you two dollar und
en cents."
"No, can't do it," replied the
gent.
"Vell, den I don't go, so help me
,rashus! I have lived in Detroit
bree yare, und shall bay bolice
ax, sewer tax, und want to grow
ip mit dis town, und I shall not be
mwindlet."
He walked off again, looking
)ack to see if the agent would not
all him, and, after a stroll around
ie returned to the window, threw
[own some money, aud said:
"Vell, dake two dollar und twen
y cents, und gif me'n dickette."
"My dear sir, can't you under
itand that we have a schedule of
)rices here, and that I must go by
t?" ielied'the agent.
"Yell, den, I sthays mit Detroit
ron dousand yare !" exclaimed the
tranger, madder than ever. "I bays
>olice taxes und sewer taxes, und I
hall see about dis by de Sheaf of
Bolice."
He walked off again, and as he
~aw the locomotive backing up to
~ouple on to the train, he went
>ack to the window and said:
"Gif me'n dickette for two dollar
md thirty cents, und I'rides on the
ylatfomf."
"Can't do it," said the agent.
"Yell, den, py golly, I spheaks to
rou what I does! Here is dem
wo dollar und sixty cents, and I
oes to Lansing und never comes
ack. No, zu.r, I shall never come
ack, or I shall come mid de blank
oad! I bays taxes by dem bolice,
md by dem zewers, und I shall
how you dat I shall haf nodding
nore to do mit dis town !"
He went on the train.
[.Detroit Free Press.
DON'T CRITIcIsE.-Whatever you
lo, don't set up for a critic. We don't
nean a newspaper one, but in private
ife, in the domestic circle, in society.
[t will not do any one any good, and
t will do you harm-if you are
alled disagreeable. If you don't like
mny one's nose, or object to any one's
bin don't put your feelings into words.
[f any one's manner don't please you,
remember your own. People are not
ill made to suit one taste, recollect
bhat. Take things as you find them
unless you can alter them. Even a
sinner, after it is swallowed, cannot
be made any better. Continual fault
anding, continual criticism of conduct
of tl'is one and the speech of that one,
bhe dress of the other, and the opinions
f t'other, will make home the un
happiest place under the sun.
A Michigan paper declares that "Dr.
Mary Walker's life is one continual
struggle to keep her pants hitched up
without the aid of suspenders."
Which, to all intents and purposes, is
slab-sided, knock-kneed and bandy
egged not so; and as a mere act of
Justice, we should like hire somebody
to add that if those sainted pants are
properly cut and made, you could no
ore pull them off without discolating
i horn button than you could pull a
camel through the eye of a needle
without first swapping him off for a
spool of thread.
If your sister fell into a well,
why couldn't you rescue her ? Be
ause you couldn't be a brother and
assist her, too.
A polite way of putting it
Trouble with a chronic indispOSl
Lnion toexertion.
ADVERTISINC RATES4
Advertisements insoted at the Me of $1.-00
per square-one inch-fortirst inserdion, and
75c. for each sabsequent inawdion. Double
column adverfisements tonper cent on above.
Notices of meetings, obituaries and tribute'
of respect, same rates per square as ordbWisY
advertisements.
Special notices in local colmna 20 cents
per line.
Advertisements not marked with dw num -
ber of insertions wMl be kept In. dU forbid
and charged accordingly.
Special contracts made with 1#qp .adver
tisers, with liberal deductious on A&we rates.
Done with Neatness and Dhqakh.
Terms Cash.
VERY BAD GRAMMAIL
The Tribune has an article on
gratumar-not bad mrmmar but
very bad grammar-in which it
says:
We hoar it on the street,, on the
cars, in business offices, in schools
and colleges, in private circles, and
sometimes in tho pulpits ad froTh
platforms. The ignorant and the'
wise, the untutored and the
scholar, are all more or less
guilty. Even when we know
what is correct in ex;pression
we are often betrayed by hab
it or association or imitation into
some violation of the King's En
glish. The following eXpreSSIODS
ini daily use among. people -who
think they are well cdacated.may
pgrhaps,call attention to this sub
ject more efficiently than theori
zing. and philosophizing upon it
will do. They have all been'gath
ered within the last few weeks
and are.the most frequent viola
tions, i n common parlance, of cor
rect grammar: "I .ainlt," for it
isn't. Ain't is a contraction of am
no t; "it-am not" is evidently er
r oneous. "Has the cows been fed?"
"I laid in Ohftee t"on of -haLyl;" -.Ch
walked twenty mile;". "coats is best'
for horse"-these violate the rule
Tyler, in his "Primitive Culture,"
thus applies to this work the law