The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, June 04, 1913, Image 6
BOWSER IS BOOB.
J*"
Phenomena Explained by His
Wnrihv Snouse.
THE EVENING BEGINS SADLY.
fiut After Raving For Quito Awhile He
Capitulate*, and Mrs. B. Does Not
"Return to Mother*?The Waiting
Gam* Wine Out.
By M. QUAD.
(Copyright. 1913, by Associated literary
Prees.]
* KNEW that I was in lor it
5 If Mr. Bowser came home feel^iog
good natnred there might be
only a few "bnmphs" of disgnst,
out U tilings at toe omce uuu
wrong then he would break loose.
i had three hours in which to make
up my mind, and when he arrived I
had decided what to da
Yon see, the other afternoon a messenger
boy brought our cook a tele*
gram to the effect that her sister, ten
miles away, was very ilj and wanted
to see her at once She was ready to
leave in half an hour, and I took hold
of the work and had a good dinner
awaiting Mr. Bowser when he reached
home. He entered the house in a pleasant
mood, but uo sooner bad 1 broken
the news to him about tbe cook than
he said:
thought it wns about time for another
kickup! By John, bnt can't you
keep a girl for fifteen minutes witfiour
a row?" > "We
haven't changed girls in five
months." I replied, "and there would
*
"hp mm. dow8rk hadn't walked off. '
. y
have been do change oaw bat for sickness.
Annie will probably be twck in
a day or^fcwo. Meanwhf'e I can do the
cooking." r S
"Meanwhile 1 have got to live on
crusts and Loues and feel that things
are upside down?" he growled. "If
there's a worse run bouse in America
I'd like to know where ifs located.
Tba tsdk has no rick 6ister. She simliljfTpilif
It'll' rm excuse to get away
Ah year cooks do that
when they cafii-ktand your ways."
"What is vrioas.wtth my ways. Mr
Bowser?'
Mt;# Kicks.
"Everything, foa crush a girl to
the earth. ?<*? grind ber to a puip.
. Ton are arooffrtf Wt& your nose cocked
UP aul demaM that Eke get down on
ber knees to you. I have always pitied
tbezn from the bottom of my heart,
poor things!"
"That** probably the Itemou why two
of tbem said yoa tohdfc googoo eyes
and tried to flirt sad two ethers called
yon an old ben and Ottrtto't stay even
wbeD I offend to increase their
wagesr
"Woman. Uv? you know what yon are
ayingr
"I do."
jt 4Tben. by tbe great born spoou. but
fee I tike taking yonr ears! ! make
googoo eyes at yonr cook! t try to
flirt with her! 1?I"MBe
calm. Mr. Bowser. There is no
need of any <juarre! o^er this thing.
1 have made op my mind that you
would come home to talk just as you
have done, and I determined on my
course. 1 have my trunk nearly
packed." .1"
? * ? ? ..n.l'l! ?*/1 hAmu f/? VA111'
OUU JTV-M H Jtv uvwv . ? iT
mother?" > .
j "I will."
"And there'll be a separation and a
divorce?"
"Certain ly r*
"And?and"?
"And that's all. After three or four
years you can marry some one who'll
run your house to suit your ideas."
"I was going to propose this very
step. Mrs. Bowser, and it is the most
sensible thing you have said in six
months. Yes, divorce is inevitable;
but of course, I sball see that you are
well provided for as to alimony."
Separation and Divorce.
Neither of us ate any of the dinner 1
had been to such pains to cook. 1 left
the table set and went op to my room
and began to bang my trunk around,
and after a few minutes. I slipped soft
> ly downstairs to find that Mr.. P.owbc:
had takes off his coat; rolled op bis
sleeves and- was clearing off the tilAo
and washing ' ftp. the dishes.
"So it's separation and dlyoree."'be
mnsed as be worked! . ."All right. It
waa bound to come sooner or later,
and why not now? When a wife will
take a crowbar and pouDd on the piano
to make her hard working ijiisUmuo
425 extra expense it's time there war
a divorce. I've talked and talked, bat
it has done no good. She's got some
good points about be^fet If wtTl Tiave
to be?have to be."
He gnmibled away below bis breath
while W was taking down the roller
towel to use as a dish towel, and then
I beard him say:
"Wonder what the mother-in-law
will say about it? I know, however.
? ? - l
She'll give me an uwiui
Shouldn't wonder if she'd come right
down here and do her song and dance
act and make it bad for me. She's got
a way about her to make a fellow's hair
stand up. Mebbe I was a little hasty
?niebbe so. If Mrs. Bowser hadn't
walked off and left me to wash these
dishes"?
1 had to go up to the sitting room to
avoid disco rery, and twenty minutes
later he found me there.
. Neither of us spoke/
Both sat down and stared into vacancy.
He Becomes Nervous.
A woman can beat a man at a waiting
game, and after a quarter of an
hmrr I Hrod Mr. Bowser out. He be
gan to shuffle his feet and twiddle his
thumbs, and at length he got up and
went into the library. I listened at the
keyhole, and as he walked to and fro 1
beard him say:
"She sits there like a bump on a log
and says nothing. If she expects me to
speak first she'll get sadly left"
He was silent for a minute, during
which be kicked the dictionary across
the floor and banged a chair about, and
then he resumed. |
"Mrs. Bowser has got her trunk pack- |
ed and will want to go in the morning, j
and I don't know what in thunder I'm ,
going to da I can't get a housekeeper |
in here, and I'll be hanged if I go to i
a hotel or boarding bouse. What did i
.she want to fire up the way she did |
for? She knows my little ways and j
has always put up with them till this
time, but the minute 1 began to talk
she said she'd been packing her trunk
to go borne Xever was so astonished
in my life, but of course, 1 had to fel:
, her to trot along. By gum, by gum!"
I heard him approaching the door.
! and I got back into the sitting room
i^He came in after a moment trying
hard to look careless, and after pacing j
nD and down be took a chair and re- |
" marked that it was snowing outdoors i
. ,j I replied that it was possible.
? I. He said that we'd had very little
snow thus far this winter.
I replied that I hadn't been interfosted.
' He then took the cat on his lap and
asked if I thought her eyesight was
failing.
He then skipped from cat to mother
in-law and hoped she was well.
She is well, thank you.
He Gives In at Last.
Then Mr. Bowser began to shuttle j
and twiddle again, and in another min- j
ute he rose up and returned to the 11- j
brary. ' I took up my former position j
just in rime to bear him say:
"The old girl's got her back up for i
fair this time. She ought to see that
I'm doing my best to make up with
her, but she won't have it Wonder
it sbejexReets me to get.dovyn on my
' v < .-j-*t :_u_? a
knees to ner: i womaoiru 1 uie iw
it but it puts ine in a bole just the
same. What in tbe old Harry is going
to become of me if she goes?'*
Then be got mad and kicked that
poor dictionary back again and back
and forth tbe other way, and it was
two minutes before he went on:
"Bowser, you are an old crank! Dnrn
your cats, but why do you jump on
anybody with both feet the way you
do? You come home and find that the
cook has been called away by sickness?legitimate
sickness?and you immediately
begin to blow and bluster
and walk around ion Mrs. Bowser. Yes.
you are an okl crank, and you've got
yourself into a nice fix at last! What
you want to do is to go right down
there and chuck that woman under the
chin and beg her pardon and? NO.
you can't do that. You want to put on
your hat and overcoat and go out and
slam the door behind you. Shell probably
get scared and come down off ber
high horse and call you back, and then
you can make up without loss of dSgnity."
I got out. of the way. and Mr. Bowser
pot his plan in operation. It didn't
work. He stood on the steps for five
minutes, waiting for a call, and when
none came he re-entered the bouse
with crestfallen demeanor. Hanging
op his hat on the hall tree, be came
bach into the sitting room and stood
and looked at ma
r I returned his gaze.
"While rm an angel"?
"Yes, you are that, and I want to
Say"? J :.;-r ^ ; ^
"So do I. I'm not going home to
mother in the morniDg."
Then? Well, then. Mri Bowser and
I had a happy evening together, and in
his exuberance of spirits he lifted the
cat to his shoulder and went dancing
around the room like a boy ten years
old. I think he'll be good for at least a
A substitute in medicine is never for
t.hp hpnpfit, of tha buyer. Never be
pursusded to buy anything bat Foley's
Honey and Tar Compound for coughs
and cold9, for children or for grown
persons. It is prompt and effective
It comes in a yellow package, with
beehive on carton. It contains no opiates.
Take no substitute for Foley's
Honey and Tar Compound. Harmon
Drug Co. adv.
' Because Senator Appelt, supported
Mr. Epward W. Hughes for Congress
from the 1st District, as against Mr.
- Wbaley, Mrs. Appelt. who has been
postmaster at Manning for the past
19 years, has been asked to resign.
This is civil service reform with a
vengeance.
The Commission* rs of the sinking
fund sold last week $49,601 with accruI
ed interest at 5 per cent for twenty
years.
Give me the every-day sort of a man,
The feller who laughs wh? n glad.
Give me rue open-faced, big-hearted
man,
The feller whoweeps when he's sad.
m^ t.Vio man xxrl-in toro in of-. wliat.
he.tninks,
The teller whose word is pure gold.
Give me the man who can always bo
found,
The feller who's not bought and sold,
Give me the man who stands up to
the rack,
The teller whose spirit ne'er bends.
Give me the man wno is there wi:h
the goods,
The'feller who 6tands by his friends.
He may not be cultured or dandy in
dress,
1119 Jarmn' may be purty 9iira.
But if he has got the red blood in his
vaiLS,
You can bank" your la9t dollar en
him
Give me no fair-weather, rollicking
friends,
The fellers who flatter and fawn,
Give me no "jolly-good-fellowship
guys.
Who fly when the bank roll is gone.
Give me the man who ha9 hit all the
bumps.
The feller who has traveled with
truth;
Who knows what true pain and anguish
can mean,
. And i9 not discouraged forsooth.
He may be a roughneck and cuss just
a bit,
And be some uncouth in his tone;
But after the judgment I've got an idee
You'll find him quite close to the
throne.
NO SUBSTITUTE COULD DO THIS
No inferior substitute, but only the
genuine Foley Kidney Pills could have
rid J. P. YVallich, Bartlett, Nebr,, of
his kidney trouble. He says:
| "1 was bothered with bacdacbe, and
the pain would run up to the back of
| my head, and I had spells of dizziness.
| I took Foley Kidney Pills and they did
[ the work and I am now entirely rid of
! kidney trouble." Harmon Drag Co.
adv.
I
%
EXPOSITION TO BE READY.
National Conservation Show To Make
Record In This Resoect.
,
The hundreds of thousands of visitors
from all parts of the country, and
particularly from the Southern States,
to the National Conservation Exposition
can be assured of one fact even at
this early date: That no matter how
early they make their visit to the exposition
after the gates are formally
thrown open they will see the displays
complete.
Work is so far advanced now that
everything will be ready on the opening
day and the complete line of exhibits
in all of the many big, whit*
buildings, and in all of the various deI
partments of these buildings, will ilke-.
| wise be ready.
I Too many times in the history of expositions
in other parts of the country
it has happened that the first weeks
saw only a portion of the exposition
complete. This will not be the case ,
at Knoxville. '
I Hair Tonic I
' -V
Aster's Hair Vigor keeps the scalp dean
ft ?" (i . /; ir'' ' X^''
| CCCUMPIA SC 1
* ?>i r t.mmma3
THE MOST COMPLETE LINE WE
HAVE EVER SHOWN IN
HARNESS,
SADDLES,
COLLARS,
BRIDLES,
ROBES,
HORSE
BLANKETS,
ETC.
We have a special home-mado slip
Harness for one-horse wagon at
$5a00i
A Set of Buggy Harness for
$10.00.
We buy Hides, Furs, Tallow, Beeswax
and pay highest market prices.
Wilse W. Martin,
1116-1118 Plain Street,
COLUMBIA - - S. 0.
,
HOW THIS WOMAN
FOUND HEALTH
Would not give Lydia ELPinkham's
Vegetable Compound
for All Rest of Medicine
!- iL. U7.JJ
ill uic ttuuu*
Utica, Ohio.?"I suffered everything
from a female weakness after baby
^ bad nUmb
sPe^s and was dizzy,
bad black spots be^?jy|p
fore my eyes, my
iilia ^ Spl back ached and I
JillA jiiil was so weak I could
Jlill hardly stand up. My
: face was yellow,
^ W'\ even my fingernails
r^l\ '/ were colorless and I
v IV/ / if had displacement I
* I J / / took Lydia E. Pink
- 'ham's Vegetable
Compound and now I am stout well and
healthy. I can do all my own work and
can walk to town and back and not get
tired. I would not give your Vegetable
Compound for all the rest of the medicines
in the world. I tried doctor's medicines
and they did me no good."?Mrs.
Mary Earl ev/inte, E.F.D: No.3, Utic3,
Ohio.
Another Case.
Nebo, 111.?"i wps bothered for ten
years with female troubles and the doctors
did not help me. i was so weak and
nervous that i could not do my work
'and every month i had to spend a few
days in bed. I read so many letters about
Lydia E. Pink ham's Vegetable Compound
curing female troubles that i got
a bottle of it. 1t did me more good than
anything else I ever took and now it has
cured me. I feel better than i have
for years and tell everybody what the
Compound has done for me. i believe I
would not be living to-day but for
that." ?Mrs. Hettie Greenstreet,
Nebo, Elinois. '
Winthrop College
SCHOLARSHIP and ENTRANCE
EXAMINATION
The examination for the award of
vacant scholarships in Wintbrop College
and for the admission of new
students will be . held at the County
Court House on Friday, July 4, at
a. m. Applicants fmu9fc be not less
than sixteen >ear9 01 age. wnen
Scholarships are vacant after July 4
they will be awarded to those making
the high est average at this examiDa-tion,
provided they, meet the'conditions
governing the awar^J. Applicants
for Scholarships should write to
President Johnson before the examination
for Scholarship . examination
blanks. ... .
Scholarships arejworth $100 and free
tnition.?The next session will open
September 17, 1913. For fnrtber information
and catalogue, address Pres.
D. B. Johnson, Rock Hill, S. C. td
Sweetj Potato Ms
h...
Tomato, Pepper, Cabbage, etc., choicest
flowering and ornamental plants
for the front yard.
: Flowers,. plants,ijbulbs and seeds
shipped everywhere.
Dose Bill Greenhouses
:* fix
Phone 43.5Columbla, s. C.
Cat oat the fL$z and fuss and fill up
on zeal'and zest.
V?? Trr* .
9 &*'?. ' h"J!-''"", i &aEs/63t*}''r ?
* ';>/.VA:- JN 'v SO. \K. Js
I" III
I
I We Have
VERY
Some Che
Studebaker,
Babcock and I
Our guarantee
I Gregc
4
'FISH AND GAME EXHIBIT.
C:\der the direction of John H. Wallace,
Jr., Game and Fish Commissioner
of Alabama, an exhibit of fish and
game lor the National Conservation
Exposition is being prepared. Audu
i bon societies are also oo-operating is
this work.
GOOD ROADS LESSONS.
Gwid roads are necessary requisites
to the development ol any country.
The necessity of good roads in the
South will be set forth by a line ot
exhibits at the National Conservation
Exposition in Knoxville this fall.
[( SALLOW COMPLEXI
| impurities in the blood, an'
I liver. It is torpid.
I eiMu
1WI
RED
LIVER REI
(THE FOWDE
Is the greatest of all liver medicii
strengthening influence is at once a
good digestion and a feeling of st:
When the system has been put in
gradually disappears and the complex
OLD IT DEALERS. PRICE,
Aak for the genainc with the Bed Z on the label,
it by mail, postpaid. Simmons Liver Regulator is p
Price $1.00 per bottle. Look for the Bed Z label.
U J. H. ZEILIN & CO.. PR<
^??i?i??I
' HARMON'S S
Oxford's
The very
latest models
Just
arriving
evry' 1725 MAI
and see o *
them. Columbii
vs ?>
b .
and are now ready to serve onr I>
Shoes at the lowest priceB in
(3) points we were careful in selec
FORT AND SERVICE. We will o
shoes and guarantee every pair.
8 (Farmers' Medium and W
E. P. & F.
Sj 1710 MAIN STREET.
? *m?egMPS*3K3?SRE3^?eS6^Ea3?
*. >^H^B
'. -?^V
i a Large Numb
BEST n
L-iX-i SIZE
a per if You V\
Mitchel and Hack
lackney the best 1
i means something.
>ry-Conder Mil
COLUMBIA, S. C.
Our Guarantee Means Something
NO ADVANCE IN HOTBL RATES. ?
Visitors to National Conservation Exposition
To Be WeH Teeated.
Those who are contemplating a visit!
to the National Conservation Exposi-)
tlon in Knoxville during the month?:
of September and October of this year,
1._ nlono r>f tllisi
call ixiaiic wen ? ? ? 1
fact: The rates at the Knoxville hotels,
will not be advanced while the Expo-!
sition is on. This has too often been;
the case in other cities where bis; national
expositions have been held. It,
~t;ii t>m the case in Knoxville.
Don't forget your County Fair.
ON comes from bilious
=^v
d the fault lies with the
ONS
> z
aULATOR
IE FORM)
res. Its powerful purifying and
pparent in an improved appetite,
rength and energy ,in the body,
order the yellow cast ia the skin
ion becomes clear and healthy.
LANQE PACKAGE. *1.00.
If yon cannot get it. remit to w? will aecd
ut op also iu liquid form for tboae wbo prefer it.
HOE STORE'
We invite
everybody
to come in
3^ and see
llNsk our c'ean
W^k and new
uc-todate
i OTfirrT we can
i dlnttl please you.
Come and
, o p see if we
I) ? don't.
wwmmmmmmm
^ We Have I
... Reoeived our B
W Spring and ||J
Summer ^
SHOES |j
axington friends with the best jjfnit
atalaa an/1 lAfitVlOTfl TillWO R
Oil Dtjicn C4U\I VV
tiDK this stock: STYLE, COMnij
show you good solid leather
ork Shoes a Specialty.) 8 J
A. DAVIS If
COLUMBIA, S. C. 81
am
HBnHBHBMBHHB 2
?
terofthe I
flULES I
ss? I
fant Them |
= i
ney W agons. j
built Buggies, i
ie Co., I