Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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BOWSER'S RULE ENDS Mother-in-law Arrives and Makes - Him Toe the Mark. SHE COMES JUST IN TIME fiead of the Household Was Raging Because Wjfe Was Sick and the ; Cook Disabled?Philosopher Leaves i home, but Returns Again. [ - C ^Copyright, 1908, by T. C. McClure.] On the street car coming home the othttf evening a man called Mr. BowA ?" a hog because he had his feet stretched in front of him, and a .woman whom he offered to assist alight called him an old baldheaded masher and wished that her husband were there to punch his head. When spot off at the corner a tramp called him "old man" and asked foe a dime, and because of these things he reached home in a dissatisfied state of mind. He soon discovered that there were other hoodoos. The cook had cot her ' thumb while peeling , potatoes, and h''- Mrs. Bowser, after vainly trying to set to dinner, had been forced by a headache to stretch out on the lounge. "Well, by John, but this is a nice house to come home to!" exclaimed Mr. Bowser when he had learned the condition of things. "But perhaps I shall soon feel better," apologized Mrs. Bowser. "I can't understand why this headache should set in all at once." "No, of course you can't but I can. Ton have got a cold. You probably .went around barefooted all the forenoon. I've spoken of it a million times, but it does no good. If I was as careV) . less as you are I shouldn't expect to l-an fill? ; |j MOTHXB-IN-LAW STOOD BEFOBX Wlf' / lire a week. Yes, ma'am, yon have taken a heavy cold, and it piay cost me a hundred dollars before yon are MimntfK, with It" p '' "You know I'm as careful as any one can be." "Oareful?humph! Too may have sal down in a snowdrift for all I know. It means bronchitis anyhow, and proba * lily consumption. I shan't concern my elf, however. If yon will slosh arounc yon can't expect mo to pity yon Where's that cook?" He descended to the kitchen anc fonnd her nursing a cut thumb. 8h< had managed to get a bit of dinner foi him nevertheless, and as he sat dowi to it he asked: . , "What were yon doing with the ax? ' "Nothing, sir. I cnt my thumb witl & knife." "Sheer carelessness. I have used i knife for years and never cat myself.' "It slipped, sir." "But it shouldn't have slipped. Yoi should have had it tied fast with i piece of clothesline. What do yon sup pose my feelings are to come home anc find the house upset like this?' ' "Can things always run along with . out something happening?' asked tin cook in an indignant voice. "Certainly they can. In the forty five years of life they have run righ along and nothing has happened to m ? - It A^l.1 - ?-noining. iib an in ituung tjue v yourself. You and Mrs. Bowser gi slosh, slosh, and it's no wonder tha you are laid up with headaches and cu thumbs. Don't expect me to put my aelf out, however." , "As to how, sir?" \ Planned to Do Some Work. I "Fve set aside this evening to tinke at the gas meter and overhaul the fui nace. I may also put a new step in th cellar stairs. There will be more o less hammering and pounding. I shal * i also whistle and sing, the 'same a - * itisual." I i "And if Mrs. Bowser expires of he ;headache, sir?" i "Then she will have to expire. It' only a question of time, anyhow, whei you careless, reckless women will go t your graves!" i The cook had nothing to say to tha and when Mr. Bpwser had finished hi meal he went upstairs, wmsumg, i ay: t "Of coarse, you don't feel any bei ter?" | "I-I think not" "I didn't expect you to. We'll t lucky if we dont have to call in tw doctors before morning. I suppose th hammer and saw and crowbar and th other tools are down cellar?" : "I suppose so." ; ''Well, I've got a couple of houri work down there, and you'll have t shut your eyes and grin and bear i Shall I tell cook to fry you some hai or something?" "Thanks, no." ' "All right Perhaps you'll eat a bal ed potato later." Mr. Bowser began to hum an air a he ran'upstairs to ohange to an ol suit, and be whistled merrily as he came pounding down. He reached the cellar and began poking at the fur- -j-J nace and whistling louder, and the noise he made drowned the sound of the front door bell. It was twenty ] minutes later that he discovered he nc wanted a big file, and he ran up to hsk 0D Mrs. Bowser if she had thrown it out ^ into the snow in the back yard. As he . reached the sitting room he came to a i dead halt and stood and stared. Mrs. Bowser was still extended on the lounge, but there was some one else present. The mother-in-law stood be- gu fore him. She was stiff and dignified ^ and severe. They looked at each other br for a full minute in silence, and then he stammered out: dfl "You?you here. .* "Samuel Bowser, I am herel" was the reply. ' co "I?I am glad, to see you." "You are nothing of the kind, sir, but j that don't make no difference to me. ^ I have arrived at a critical juncture, t *?? t ?1 ?~ Ja t owItto +/\ find just as x aiwajs uv. a Sarah suffering with a splitting head- ( ache, and you are knocking the house CQ to pieces and whistling and singing j as if you hadn't a care on your mind. It's got to stop. It's got to stop this at very minute." fo "I want to fix the furnace." ja "But y.ou let it alone. Not another jar or jam or I'll make your heart . ache!- ^ "Perhaps I don't run my own house," observed Mr. Bowser after glaring at ^ the determined face before him. j, "Not while I am here, Samuel?not while Betsey Baker is alive and on ^ deck. Whafs the matter with you? ^ Whafs given you such a mean look g{( since I was here last? You look as if y ou had been stealing sheep.ar v "If s seeing you, I guess." t pj "Oh, is it? Wellj you'll see a good deal mere of me before you see less. Xf you don't have your wings clipped a about once to so often you fly high. ^ Santo is down with a headache, the ^h cook has cut her thumb, and I wish jayou to make me a cup of tea." to Mr. Bowser looked at her for thirty ^ seconds with mutiny in his eye and then went slowly downstairs and turn* "w ed housewife. When he had got a lit- ca tie dinner together he called her down, > and as she sat at the table he said: 0f "We might just as well settle this mi thing right here." r "It is settled," she replied. * ' 0L "You expect to come hero and run jn my house, do you?" !' .. fa "I do." ^ "And order me about as if I was some kid?" pi "When I think you ought to be or- ca dered I shall order and you will obey." ^ "Never! I will leave the coop first!" ^ "Could you leave it In ten minutes?" u "Yes, in nine. By the great, horn w spoon, but things have come to a pretty pass when"? "Samuel, you can fly th4 coop," said the old lady as she held up her hand ? to check further words. ( "I'll be hanged if I don't!" Rushed Out of the House. f( ? And he rushed upstairs and put on 0] his hat and overcoat and was out of ti > the house like a cannon balL It was a ti cold, windy1 night, with snow falling 0] t occasionally, and he hadn't got a hun- s\ t dred feet outside the gate when he & wished! himself back in the "coop." He - had to walk to keep warm. He began iS I going around the block. On his first tl round two loafers met him and elbow- n ed him Into & snowdrift On the seo- 0i L ond a policeman stopped him and said tf J he should keep an $ye on him. On the C] * third he was offered 10 cents to clean n i off a man's sidewalk, and a boy hit tl him In the ear with a chunk of ice. d * When he had arrived opposite his gate g i on his fourth round, the mother-in-law tl appeared in the door and beckoned and . \ i cflled: e; * "Samuel, I want you to come in." h "What for?" he sulkily asked. d t "Because ifs bedtime, and I am go- e 1 ing to shut up the house. Come right tJ - along." 81 1 And Mr. Bowser disappeared into ^ the house and left the butcher's boy a - on the opposite side of the street to n & utter a "Whew!" and add: ^ c "By George, but there must be a new deal on in the house of Bowser!" n t M. QUAD. $ e y ^ "Steady Work." ti O * t The Book Reviewer. 11 First Book Reviewer?Bobbins seems to be getting up quite a reputation as an autbor. c Second Book Reviewer?Yes, I foresee the time when we will simply be is forced to read his books.?New York t d Life. 1 W??BB?W?M3BatPWBW1W??wa COSTLY MATTRESSES. ie Kind That Are Used on the Gig Plate Glass Wagons. , Probably about as costly a sort of attress as any is one tbat is made >t to sleep on at all, but to spread i the long, broad table or platform of ^ e wagons built for carrying plate ass. These mattresses, which are made of rled hair, are very thin, scarcely icker than a comfortable, and must s made with the greatest care to inre perfect uniformity of thickness, lump anywhere would be likely to eak the plate of glass resting upon and there would be still greater rnger if the weight of two plates of ass was rested on the lump at once. A. mattress for a plate glass wagon sts, according to size, from $G0 to | 5. In use the corndf^ of smaller < -x?? ?- ?1?4 An 4* mit- IntA +V\a tlnlf. 11C9 UObliCU VU 1U VUI< IUIV lull uv? g covering, and sooner or later it has be made over. Simply to make over eh a mattress costs from $20 to $25. On the table topped and mattress vered glass wagons the biggest ates are carried with confidence and fety. The table is built to remain ] >solutely rigid, and the thin but unirm mattress protects the plate from r. Before plate glass store fronts had me into common use, when the han- j ing of a big plate was counted as a K)d deal more of a job than it is now, < ey used to carry a great pane of ass in a sort of frame, which was it on the wagon with the glass in it k its destination this frame or sup>rt was worked carefully across the lewalk to the store front, where the ass was dislodged from It to be set, id altogether the setting of a great ate of glass was then quite an unmaking? Now, .with the setting of such plates common daily occurrence and with en skilled in the handling of them, ey. simply^sjiny a big plate out and jr it THT their mattreSg covered table pped wagon and carry it to where is to go and there slide it offi to rest for a moment on blocks on the sidealk, and then they pick it up and rry it to the window front >{ rhen they run under the lower edge " * 4 Krr xx?V>f/?K ine glass iuuug suai?, uj en standing inside the window as pll as men standing outside caq. lift t it when the glass is put into placd the window frame. There again it raised on blocks until the straps can s withdrawn, and then the blocks are ken out and the glass secured in ace, all this being done with great ire, but still with comparative ease id quickness and with certainty, and these times great panes of glass e thus moved and set on all but the ihdiest days.?Cleveland Plain Dealer. DOG INTELLIGENCE. he Clever "Mafamutet" That Carry the Mailt In Alaska. The Eskimo begins to train his dog >r sledge work before it is a month d. One of the most interesting feaires of Eskimo villages are puppies ed to the pole of a tent They pull i the rope with all their puppy xength in the effort to break away ad join in the frolics of their elders. Not until a dog bred for mail service > one year old Is it put in training for le trail. It begins by running ten liles with the,team; then It is dropped at N$xt day it runs the same dismce. Gradually the distance is Inreased until it reaches lis fifteenth lonth of life, when it becomes part of le regular service. The life of a mail og is from three to four years. No reater punishment can be inflicted1 lan to lay a dog off from service. iThen unruly they are often threataed with a lay-off, and with almost , uman intelligence they seem to unerstand the disgrace it Implies in the yes of their fellow workers on the rail. All fight to be leaders. A confcant spur to an unambitious dog Is le "outsider," who will quickly take way the leadership not only in the lail service, but in teams maintained hiefly for the pleasure of the sport he intelligence of the malamute is relarkable, its scent wonderful, its intinct, as a rule, unerring. Some dogs are better trail followers lan others, as some are better leadrs. In a blizzard the best of them ise the trail, but invariably find it Fhen on the trail they never eat but nee a day, then at the end of a jourey. After feedipg, like weary chilren, they fall asleep and are never uarrelsome. It takes on an average A ?- 3~ 4r% Art-TV f O weniy yuuaus ui iwa ?. ivi ?. sam of eleven dogs on a hard route.? ,ida Rose McCabe in St. Nicholas. Navy Is Never Done. A navy, like a railroad, is never one. Thiere never comes th,e grateful aoment when the work can be said to e finished and the sole task left to be ischarged is that of operation. A# the oadbed, track, equipment of a *raiload must be constantly maintained nd improved, so if there Is to be any lavy fct all equipment must be contantly improved and brought up to late, even under the policy of "re>lacement and repair."?Boston Trancript. Royal Crowns. Royal crowns have tended to become Ighter. Thus, one made in the middle ges weighed over seven pounds, that ?f George IV. weighed five and onelalf pounds, while Queen Victoria's rown, containing the great ruby vhlch belonged to tne tsiacjc Prince, reighed three and one-quarter pounds. A Good Talker. "They say her conversational powers are immense." "Is that so?" "Yes, sir. They tell me that girl once alked clear through 'Parsifal.' Louisville Courier-Journal. THE PUCE Ti /our Summer < Goods and N ale; 919 Gervais Street, i Street, Opi We carry a fall and comj Ladies' Gents' and Children's straw goods. Our prices are guarantee satisfaction. We1 not. CITI Are Y \ Fl We have ever Installment, are tfc giving them just v; erate what we carr see us, you will fin i Bed Room, Dining you read this adve ffttHM rt JH 1201 FREE? OWINfiS' DRUG Alfred J. Fox, 9 Real Estate i and Insurance, LEXINGTON, - S. C. -trV-VT3. ? A T .T7 < 60 acres within one mile of ] Arthur. ( One 10 horsepower boiler. ( One 8 horsepower engine. J One 50 saw gin. i One shingle mill. ( One grist mill, j Timber to cut 500,000 shingles. , 20 resident lots in the town of i Lexington. / | 30 acres good farming land in ( Rocky Creek. miles from ( Peter's church. | 5 lots near Lexington Depot. ( One valuable lot in the town of < Lexington,,S. C. | 12 Acres just outside incorporate i limits, Lexington, S. C. < 6 Acres very near Lexington, j S, C. i Store building and lot on Main < street, Lexington, S. C. ] House and lot in town Lexing< ton?\ acre land; 6-room dwelling. < 250 acres on Southern V railroad ] 2h miles from Barr, 4 miles from i Gilbert?2 buildings, gbod or< chard, 50 acres open land. j $ acre and three room house i near to-frn of Lexington. < 1 acre lotr?two story building, ] at Irene, S. C. | REUT. ? j Une store room, one wmcnuuBo i Lexington, S. C. | Write or call to see me j AT i THE HOME BANK, ! Lexington, S. C. ! VVfVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV1 Barbecue at Summerland. We will furnish a firstclass bar bee at Summerland Mineral Springs, 1 tween Batesbnrg and Leesville, on Jr 4th. L. P. Alewine, 7w35 S. P. Alewine. 3 BUY Clothing, Cents' lotions, Shoes, I X. AYC near S. A. L. Depot, posite Union Station, G >lete line of latest styles in Sui Hats in latest block and colon the lowest, and we take nlea \ want our Lexington friends to IZENS OF LEXII ou Going JRNITUI \ y article fti this line, and our pri ie very lowest. We take pride in rhat they want at prices that suit, y in stock, but we assure you, if j d any kind of Furniture you maj : Room or Kitchen. Think of us rtisement and be sure to call whe: WMTF11 I I Main Street, Columb A headache powd6i lervous headache in free sample. STOBE, 1438 Main Si i J. B. : | Wholesale | General Merch; : Pork a: | 932 GERVAIS STREET, ! Heavy and Fancy Gro< ! | prices, and the highest pri< ! Produce, etc. " [ This is the only place i ! killed and home-cured mes ! Call to see us while in the ! | HOOSIEF iI The E i I WeSellI I PLUMBIM ! I We Sell| I MACHINE | I Southern St ! I COLII When in Ci |T. B. The Qui ! 937 ge] For Your r; J He; Fresh stock c *y hand at lowesi Flour a special Furnishings, Dry Hats, etc., is at Hinie 'UDO, also at 402 1-2 Main olumbia, S. G. miner Clothing, low cuts in Shoes, ' 3. We also carry a nice line in i sure in showing our goods and call and see us whether they buy IGTON, / to Buy RE! ( Mi |> ces, either for Cash]] or serving our customers, It is useless to enumrou will only drop in to t need for your Parlor while at home when a in Columbia. IK CO. lis, Si Ci that will relieve sick or 30 minutes. Write for Ireet, Colambia, S. C. BERIOT. and Retail Dealer in ^ ' andise, Beef, Mutton, nd Sausage, uui.umjtfiA, a. v.. series always in stock at lowest ses paid for Beef Cattle, Country in the city to get strictly homeits. Home-rendered lard a specialty, city. l PUMPS 1 lest on Earth I IG SUPPLES I :RY SUPPLIES I 'ates Supply Co., i MBIA, S. C. B ? olumbia Call to See ROACH ality Grocer, &VAIS STREET, ancy and avy Groceries. >f goods always on b prices. Pinnacle ty.