The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, April 06, 1904, Page 2, Image 2
Bowser's G
He Discovered an Exterminate
Tens of Thousands
of Dollars to
(Copyright. 1DTi4. by C. D. Lewis.]
JUST what Mr. Bowser had in the
little package in his hand when
*ne came up to dinner the other
evening Mrs. Bowser couldn't
guess, and he carefully laid it aside and
volunteered no information until the
meal was finished and they had settled
down for the evening. There was a
glow of satisfaction on his face that
' i-?? i............ nn/l iirnr n nrl
warxicu nor in ucHiur, <uiu iiu.. uu? j
then he chuckled to himself like a man
with a good thing up his sleeve. This
continued for a quarter of an hour, and
then be took a pamphlet from his pocket
and assumed a serious air and said:
"Mrs. Bowser. I have some rather
strange literature here, and if you
don't mind I will read a few interesting
statistics."
"Why can't we go into Green's tonight
for a game of cards?" she queried
' Because I have something of far
more importance on hand. I have been
experimenting for the last few weeks,
and toright I am about to bring my
labors to a head."
"I thought you had some little scheme
on hand when 1 saw that package. Are
you going to sow grass seed on the
cement of the cellar bottom?"
"Madam, don't take me for a foolnot
quite!" he brusquely replied.
"Perhaps you've got a lot of peas
.which ripen in March."
"rroDaoiy.
"Or you arc going to plant corn on
the brickbats iu the back yard."
"Whatever I do it will be some tomfool
thing, of course. You can't credit
xne with having the brains of a frog.
Instead of rejoicing with me that my
labors have been crowned with success
you are ready to fling out innuendoes
and insults to discourage me.
k n Hh
BOWSER HAD BEEN DRIV]
I was going to toll you all about it, but :
now you won't get a word?not a
word."
The cat had made arrangements to 1
meet a neighbor's feline in the back
yard at 7 o'clock and scrap for the
championship of the state, but seeing
that a family row was more than probable
she decided to cancel her engagement
and remain inside. Mr. Bowser
got up and walked back and forth a
few times and flushed from red to
white and back again, but presently
his anger disappeared and he sat down j
and picked up his pamphlet and asked: !
"Mrs. Bowser, have you any idea of i
the number of rats running loose in j
America at this present momentV"
"Good gracious, uo!" she replied.
"I thought not. and I am prepared
to astonish you. The number, as estimated
by good authority, is slightly
over 100.000.000?100.000.000, Mrs.
Bowser. If they were strung out in
single tile, bend to tail, they would
reach clear around the world."
"I thought there might be ten or fifteen."
she mused, "but as for a hundred
million"?
"That is for all America. Mrs. Bow- ;
ser. The number in the United States
is exactly 7:>.S24.."2t3. or was at 10 !
o'clock this morning, when the last es- j
timate was made. The number for j
our own state is .4 few over 3.000.000. j
.and for this city and county bOO.UUO. j
Do you know the value of what a full j
jjrown rat <*onsuuics in a day?"
, "How should IV"
"Yes. how should you or any other j
woman take any interest in such things :
I
when there are novels to be had at 10 j
cents apiece and all the stores are ad- I
vertisinjr sprint: bargains? Yon have i
never triven it a passim: thought. of
course, and you won't remember it lifteen
minutes, but let me tell you that
the cash value of what every rat eats 1
and destroys every twenty-four hours
is exactly <? cents. To say nothing of
what KMMHMMKH) rats are costing the
country every day. the eost to this
city alone is far in excess of S.TUHH)
per week, or about $l.tHM?.(HK) a year."
"Dear me. but who'would have believed
it V"
"A million a year wasted in one city
alone. besides llie annoyance one is
put to by having rats around the
house. Suppose this million could be
saved. Mrs. Kowser?suppose a hundred
million per year could be saved.
"Would there he any widows wailiti?
for hi cad or orphans shivering with
the colli? Would the man who could
briti? about this savin? be spoken of
as greater than Washington, or referred
to fis a fool
"Why, he >\ouKl be praised to the
lood Thing
j
I
r That Will Slay Rats by the j
and Save Millions
the Country
I
i
skies," replied Mrs. Bowser, "but you '
?you don't mean to say"?
*'I mean to say, my dear woman?I
mean to say that right here in this
package is the stuff to do the business
and that the name of the man who will
do it is Bowser."
"Why?why"--'
"You are astonished, are you? I
thought you would be. l*'or twenty
years you Lave referred to my fads
and held it up to me that I was a soft
mark, but I have bided my time. My
time has come at last. In a month
I will have exterminated every rat in
the city; in a year America will not
have one left. Six months hence you
will see my statue in bronze or marble
in almost every public square in
the country."
"But I don't see how?how"?
"You don't see how I discovered it."
he finished as she hung on to her
words. "Experiment, Mrs. Bowsertime
and thought and experiment. Tonight
I shall clear our own house of
the pests, and tomorrow the exterminator
shall be in the hands of hun- j
ilreds of our fellow citizens."
"But I am afraid that something will
come: of it." protested Mrs. Bowser.
"You never do anything of the sort
but what?what"?
"Certainly something will come of
it. Millions of dead rats and millions
of dollars saved to the country will
come of.it. That's the idea, you
know.".
"And you won't blame ino?"
"Blame you? Don't be a chump,
Mrs. Bowser. When did I ever blame
you. and where will there be a chance
to blame on this occasion? There are
no less than,live ratholes in our kitchen.
From fifty to a hundred rats come
out and gambol and disport themselves
^===^
BX TO MOUNT A CHAIR.
every night. All I have to do is to pnt
a little pile of this stuff on the floor in
front of each hole, and the exterminator
does the rest. Tomorrow* morning:
you look out of your windows and
see a cart load of dead rats in front of
the house, and you'll turn about and
embrace me and give me my just dues
at last. I will now go down and prepare
for the slaughter."
"Rut yon will be careful and not fool
with the hot water boiler or the gas
meter and bring about an explosionV"
she entreated, while the eat put on a
solemn look and purred as hard as she
could.
Mr. Bowser gave her a look of mingled
pity and contempt and picked up
his package and went downstairs, followed
at a respectful distance by the
cat. Mrs. Bowser heard him poking
amnnri for n miarter of an hour, and
then lie passed on down cellar to fix the
furnace.
He had returned to the kitchen and
put in another ten minutes when she
was jumped to her feet by a wild yell
of "Police!" Tlrat was followed by a
cry of "Fire!"' and that again by a
shriek for "Help!" Her knees suddenly
weakened, and she could hardly
make her way downstairs, but when
she opened the kitchen door it was to
witness a spectacle that appalled her.
That exterminator had brought a
i hundred or more rats into the house.
| They were not only crying for it. but
fighting over it and enjoying the taste
I and asking for more. They had come
! with a rush, and Bowser had been
| driven to mount a chair, and the cat
I had leaped upon the kitchen table, and
; botli were prisoners. Mrs. Bowser
I grabbed the broom and laid about her
! with pluck and vigor. Temporarily disj
mayod. tie* rats permitted Bowser and
l the cat to escape and close the door
behind them. Then they issued forth
j again in increased numbers in search
j of more of that good stuff.
| "1 knew how it would be!" pantingly
j exclaimed Mrs. Bowser as she sank into
! a chair in the dining room.
! Bowser had c??t a scare, and it look
| Him two or three minutes to rally.
"Instead of exterminating the rats
j you have simply drawn hundreds more.
J and we will be eaten out of house and
J home. I knew it would be so. I
1 knew" "Woman."
lie said as lie towered over
| her with the dignity of a <*?vsar. "I
| wish To hoar nothing further from you.
j The conspiracy to assassinate nie is as
I in., .mo. im \-(?:ir face. and to
; ?..> .
morrow my lawyer will see your lawyer
ami arrange aliout the divorce anil
alimony <Jood nitrlit. would In* nmrii
(leress: ?o<:d nijrlit:" M. Ql"Al>.
71 Qhest that Came in
the Mayflower
Is sure to attract the attention of every
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So the woman of to-day may keep her
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World's Dispensary Medical AssoCIA'iion,
Proprietors, Buffalo, N. Y.
Miss Stella Johnson, of 28 Brady St., Dayton.
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Take Dr. Pierce's Pleasant Pellets instead
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All Obstacles Removed.
P*ris, March 31 ?The first civil
tribunal of the department of the
Seine todav decided the case rf the
r public of Colombia agairst the
Panama canal company in favor of
defendants. The eecision removes
a I l9ff*l obstacle to the transfer of
th * canal conception from the company
to the United States.
?
The Best Family Salve.
DeWitt's Witch Hazel Salve gives
inatai t relief from Burn1', cures
Cuts, Bruises, Soiee, Eczema, Tetter
aid all abrasions of the skin. In
buving Witch Hezel Salve it is only
nec^ssarv to sse 1 hah you get the
g< nuine DeWitt's and a cure is e/rtaiu
Tnere are many cheap counterfeits
on the market, all of which
srewortbless and quite a few are
d-ngeroue, while DaWicl's Witch
Hazel Salve is perfectly harmless and
cures. Sold by all druggists.
AAAAmmm|
Without Music is fike unto
your using some other
COOKING
COMPOUND
I
\
said to be
"JUST AS GOOD" AS
!
i Palmatina
| ?"W
When
! Yon
| Can
I Gsu I
I PALMATINA
THE PUREST
VEGETABLE FAT
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ON THE MARKET j
'
The Wesson Company
l
i ^ SAVANNAH. OA.
^ '
j
I - "
"Why He Stopped His Paper.
I've stopped my pajier. yes I bev,
I didn't like to do it.
But the Editor he got t<x> smart
And I allow he'll rue it.
I am a man as pays his debts.
And won't he insulted.
So when an Editor gets too smart,
I want to be consulted.
I took his paper eleven years
And helped him all I could, sir.
An' when it comes to duiinin' me
I didn't think he would, sir.
\
But that he did and you can betIt
made me hot as thunder.
Says I. I'll stop the sheet. I will,
if the cussed tiling goes under.
I hunted up the measly whelp.
And for his eunnin' caper;
I paid him 'leven years an' quit,
Yes, sir. 1 stopped his pajier.
A Great Sensation.
There was a big sensation in Leesville,
lad, when W. H. Brown, of
that place, who was expected to die,
had bis life saved by Dr. King's New
Disovery for Consumption. He
writes: "I endured insufferable
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New Discovery gave me immediate
relief and soou thereafter tff.-efced a
complete cure." Similar cures of
Consumption, Pneumonia, Bronchitis |
and Grip are numerous. It's the I
peerless remedy for ?11 throat and j
lung troubles. Price 50c andSl-0'J j
Guaranteed by The Kaufmaun Drug j
Co , Druggist. Trial bottles free.
The Cotton Market.
Kew York, March 31 ?With cables
from Liverpool eight pojnts better j
than expected there ws^ a general j
rush of shorts to cover up in the j
local cotton market this morning, j
Prices ran up quickly in anticipation j
of the holding?.
If troubled with weak* digestion
belching or sour stomach, use Chamberlain's
Stomach and Liver Tablets
aDd you will get quick relief. For
sale by The Kaufmann Drug Co.
SEWING MACHINES!
Wheeler & Wilsonj
No, 9,
BALL GEARING
Marvelonsly Light Running and Noisless
(a No. 100 spool cotton thread for h belt
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A OREVT FAVORITE WITH DRESS
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NEEDLES FOR ALL MACHINES.
REPAIRING A SPECIALTY. WORK |
; GUARANTEED.
ATTACHMENTS, SHUTTLES, ETC.
In bringing Machines to be repaired it is
only necessary to bring the head?Leave
the table at home unless it needs
renairing too.
1900
Washers and Wringers/
The most perfect Washer ever
invented. I can sell them at my
store for less than they will cost you
ordered direct from the factory.
Write fof circulars and prices.
J*. EC. BEEET,
1804 MAIN ST., COLUMBIA, S. C.
April 1. 1903. 3m
j Alfred J. Fox,I
I Life and Fire
Insurance and
i t
i . :
iReal Estate
j
Agent, |
! Lexington, S. C i
i
Only First Class Companies Repre- j
son ted.
My companies are popular, strone
and reliable. No one can give vour
business better attention; no one can
give you better protection; no one can
give yon better rates.
I
Prompt and careful attention given i
to buying and selling Real Estate,
both town and country properties, j
Correspondence respectfuly solicited. ! j
] 2
Money to Loan.
WE A HE PREPARED TO NEGOTIate
loans promptly in sums of $300
and upwards on improved farming lands in
Lexington county. Long time and easy
terms. No commissions. Borrower pays
actual expenses of preparation of papers.
THOMAS & GIBBES.
Colombia. S. C,
November 1. 1003 - 6mo.
I .
ft , , If
1 J. P. ABLE, S
''^^f' DEALEli IN '^\P J
ft U_ & *
M ^3HOB?& $U
.M, CLOTHISO,
m STAPLE AM) FAM V GHOCERiES, =Jp; .
## IIAB1JWABE,
i|S | T1X AM) WOODEXWARE, ETC,, ||
W- LEESVILLE, S. C. W
im I 4#
m?- -wSir
^t?
" - "* "45^ " " >7Ss^'' +.V\^'
WM. PLAIT, ,
DEALER IN
t
Dry Hoods* Millinery and Notions, <
NEAELY OPPOSITE POST OFFICE,
COLUMBIA, - S. O.
MAIN STREET.
We have received and have placed on our shelves one of the most beautiful as well as the
most complete line of d
SPRING AND SUMMER GOODS. J
ever shown in the city. These are all standard goods from the most reliable manufacturers
and are rc-commeuded lor their stylish aud nobby appearance and the beauty of
pattern. A full line of Ginghams and dre?s goods ot all descriptions, as well as
lovely creations in fashionable spring and summer millinery. < Gome and see
tnese goods beiore purchasing. 1 will make it to your interest to do so.
October, 9.?3m.
| We Have j 1
RECEIVED OUR
i sPRii m mm shoes
i and are now ready to serve our Lexington friends with the best shoes at the
lowest nriee thev ever boueht. Three (3) points we were caretul in select
ing this stock:
STYLE, COMFORT AND SERVICE.
We will only show ycu Good Solid Leather Shoes and guarantee every pur.
E. P. <fc F. A. DAVIS,
1710 MAIN SIBEET,
I COLUMBIA. - - - S. C.
| YOUNG'S I |
| DRY GOODS 1 1
II arid. p
| NOTIONS. 1
jfj|S| Dress Goods and Dress Trimmings. Ladies Ribt>ed
Underwear, Hosiery, Gloves, Handkercliiefs, Ribbons,
Lace, Corsets, Embroidery. A big line of all w
P||| wool Blankets. Some rare bargains in Comforts. ^ ^
P ?MEN'S FURNISHING GOODS? M
P m
This department of our business receives our most
careful attention and we iire sure we can show you fw
40 goods in this line eqinil u> any ever shown. ^
We are not equalled in our line of Men's Shirts. Collars,
Cliffs and Ties, Susjiendcrs and Hosiery, Gloves and
Night Robes. |j|
| Underwear. | *
p ??? p
fp^ We carry a full line of Umbrellas. Trunks?Trunks?
Trunks. We invite you ro call on us while in the city.
| | 1:7. "5T OU1TG-, jf j
'<0 1833 Main Street, Lever's Old Stand, fj?j! I
! If COLUMBIA, - - S. C. f |
|