Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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The Lexington Dispatch, j Wednesday, April 9. 1902. General Mixture. Few people are envied because of their wealth. An heiress would be as sweet by any other name. All binds nf ueeful employment are equally honorable. A fassy man gets in his own way when he is in a hurry. Many an individual talks like a wise man and acts like a fool. Ridicule no man for hia snub nose; you can never tell what may turn up. A successful man forms a plan and sticks to it, working like a gimlet to a point. When all men are what they pretend to be the milleaium problem Tinll bo ??sr " "* ? J ' It's a lucky tbiag for men that rosebuds mouths haven't any thorns on them. Pyny-R&lsam Relieves Right Away and makes a speedy end of coughs and colds. If a man doesn't know when to be Bilenfc he doesn't know when 1) speak. Fortunate is the man who realiy deserves his own opinion of himself. A little luck and a fools ignorance have made many a fine reputation for bravery. God seldom lookg into the house where there are no little finger marks on the walls. Governor Beckham, of Kentucky, has vetoed a bill prohibiting the dockiDg of horses' tails. $25,000 has been put up by the sportiDg characters of Charleston to secure the Jeffries-Fitzsimmons fight. i There is a good deal of cholera in i Manila, but it has not attacked any of the United States soldiers yet. Try Chamberlain's Stomach & Liver Tablets, the best physic. For sale by J. E Kiufmann. The Fucker cotton press and 2,100 ' bales of cotton were burned at Athens, Ga , recently, a loss of $155,* 000 partly insured. The war department is alarmed at the rapid increase of drunkenness and immorality among the United States soldiers in the Philippines. May 20 is the day fixed for turning over Cuba to the civil government, and on that day the United States soldiers will be withdrawn. By brushing shoes with a soft brush, rubbing a little glyceiine well into the leather and polishing with a very clean, soft brush or rag, no blacking will be required. Hilton's Life for the Liver and Kidneys tones! 1 - up the stomach. ^ EQUINE INTELLIGENCE. | Writer Who Believes Thnt Horses I Are Capable of Thinking ^ There are people who deny 1 hut the horse is able to plot, to conceive or reason. Some horses are duller than others, and some apparently are be'tcr equipped for thought than the men in charge of them. You teach a licrse to start or stop at a word, and acts of kindness or cruelty are seldom forgotten by him. At a farm that we visit a little girl who has given sweetmeats to spirited animals can take the grt*t1 est liberties with them. The stranger has to keep a safe distance from their heels, while she may crawl between^ their legs. They remember her acts of [ kindness and carefully avoid doing anyf thing to harm her. We have in mind a stallion who was harshly punished. He treasured up the i act of injustice, anu the author of his humiliation was compelled to keep aloof from him. llis manner plainly indicated that the man would get hurt if he ventured within striking distance. This stallion trusts those who have 1 shown him consideration and in the main is not a bad tempered horse. lie appears vicious only to those who have r treated him viciously. His knowledge j of right and wrong suggests thought, tt ciir?w-<j rvm.iriiv to reason from cam e ! ! to effect. Teach a horse as you would 1a child what to fear and what to do, j and the lesson will never be forgotten. Some horses cunningly open their j stable doors by removing pegs with their teeth and thus put plan into operIation. Their imagination is fired by beautiful scenery. Put one in a paddock where he can look out upon the hills and hear the birds sing and you * .... i will quiet his nervous system. 111 moments of contemplation he has the dreamj look of a poet. I About the only time that a horse \ forgets to think is when he surreptitiously finds his way to the well filled oat bin. lie then does not eat in a rational way, but gorges himself to j the danjrer point. This is an unmis- I L 30BWMPM?BHMMMBMlMlll.il IBUlUHm WGBP?BPPi3B^3K Women as Well as Men J Are Made Miserable by Kidney Trouble. Kidney trouble preys upon the mind, dis- 13 courages and lessens ambition; beauty, vigor tand cheerfulness socn disappear v/hen the kidneys are out of order ^ or diseased. Kidney trouble has r become so prevalent 3 n that it is not uncommon jj for a child to be born afflicted with weak kidneys. If the child urin- h ates too often, if the tl urine scalds the flesh or if, when the child u reaches an age when it should be able to ^ control the passage, it is yet afflicted with bed-wetting, depend upon it. the cause of l - rr> ii? i.:J 1 ~ 3 xt /: a I ?4 Tfie Glincuiiy 15 Kiancy irouuiL-, anu uic 11151 step should be towards the treatment of el these important organs. This unpleasant ? trouble is due to a diseased condition cf the n kidneys and bladder and not to a habit as h' most people suppose. gWomen as well as men are made miserable with kidney and bladder trouble, and both need the same great remedy. The mild and the immediate effect of Swamp-Root is soon realized. It is sold by druggists, in fiftycent and one dollar sizes. You may have a ijjfiijfiP? sample bottle by mail free, also pamphlet tell- Homo of Swaarp-Root. ing all about it, including many of the thousands of testimonial letters received from sufferers cured. In writing Dr. Kilmer & Co.. Binghamton, N. Y., be sure and mention this paper. takable evidence of weakness. And yet there are men endowed with intellect who have little or no control over their appetites. Absence of restraint at the feast marks the development of the human as well as of the equine race. In our judgment, the horse sometimes thinks.?Turf, Field and Farm. "J APHORISMS. ^ t'i Observe your enemies, for they first tf find out your faults.?Antisthenes. si Envy always implies conscious infericrity wherever it resides.?Pliny. b' The less heart a man puts into a j* tnci-thomnw bihnr it reauires.?Amiel. v~v. ? .. ? , Evasion is unworthy of us and is always the intimate of equivocation.? Balzac. f.1 li! The same people who can deny others everything are famous for refusing themselves nothing.?Leigh Hunt. ~ If there is any person to whom you .r feel dislike, that is the person of whom n< you ought never to speak.?R. Cecil. n< The chief pang of most trials is not s. so much the actual suffering itself as our own spirit of resistance to it.? Jean Groa. p; There is no beautifier of complexion pj or form or behavior like the wish to \V scatter joy, and not pain, around us.? Emerson. b< Success is sweet, the sweeter if long fc delayed and attained through manifold struggles and defeats.?A. Bronson Alcott. True popularity takes deep root and spreads itself wide, but the false falls away like blossoms, for nothing that is false can be lasting.?Cicero. Blunders of Painters. A picture representing the four elements was essayed by an Italian artist, and lie selected fisb to indicate the sea, moles the earth and a salamander fire. The chameleon was intended as the allegorical representative of the air, but the painter, having no model of this animal and knowing nothing about its shape, contented himself by introducing a camel. He probably thought in his ignorance that from a similarity of sounds they were one and the same animal. Another painter in a picture of the crucifixion represented a father confessor holding out a crucifix to the repentant thief who was promised a place in paradise by the Saviour. A Honeymoon Financier. Judge Edwards of Lee county, who has married over a hundred couples since he has been ordinary, performed L the ceremony recently for a runaway 11 couple seated in a buggy in the public road. The ceremony over, the bridegroom u fumbled in his pocket and fished up n 30 cents. U "ledge," he said, "this here's all the money I got in the roun' work. Ef si you're a mind to take it, you kin. hut I'll say straightfor'ards that I'd done n sot it aside fer the honeymoon ex- u penses!"?Atlanta Constitution. a tl Di*ap])ointed. g] "So you advise me not to sue?" said p the client. e "I do," said the lawyer. y "Well." returned the disappointed client, "it seems strange that when a man pays for advice he can't get the p kind he wants."?Chicago Post. u ? Heroic. j< Gladys?Why did she ever marry v him? tl Ethel?Oh. he said he couldn't live 0 without her! 0 Gladys?Well, she ought to get a medal for life saving.?I'uck. ^ If you have a dime, don't make your- f sell believe it is a dollar. That is v.*hat ! ?. you do when you stop work to tell j what a good man you are.?Atchison rj Globe. \ ? - - j t Neglect Means Danger. J Don't neglect biliousness and con- I sfcipation. Your health will suffer I , permanently if you do. DeWitt's ; ] JLittle J^ariy JLisers cure suca cases j c M. R. Smith, Butternut, Mich , says I ^ DeWitt's Little Early Risers are the j ( most satisfactory pills I ever took, i 1 Never grippe or cause nausea." J. 5 E. Kaufmann. HMHWBBM?Haawn-r??iii iOWSER IX HISTORY | ELECTED AS ONE OF FIFTY OF THE MOST EMINENT CITIZENS. [Ik Wiff Aidn 13it:i la Recalling the Most S rikinK Incidents of Ills LLe. Which Would Have Covered Over Ten Paso* but For an Accident. [Copyright. 1902. by C. B. Lewis.] WHEN Mr. Bowser canto home ! the other owning, ho didn't | have "that tired fooling" to warn Mrs. Dotvsor that j o proposed to kick up a row over I 10 gas bill: but. on the contrary, ho ! as stopping high mul swelled up with j nportance. She know i*i an instant i "if cnm/1 (inn 1 > 111 bnctl 1 ? ! t tor i T>fT h'Tll iU k. |"V7 I I IV v/uv lilkU k/v v, k* 4A??wv? ^ ^ ? - j nd that if she only gave him rope | uough he would explain all. lie look- j 1 at her and talked to her in a pat- J mixing way throughout the dinner I our. and he appeared to be on his i uard against letting himself down, j ~ ? ii fV ~* V* SSiJ^SMiSfcl^i ^ IE WAS KICKED IX THE STOMACH BY A j COW." rhen dinner was over, he lighted his j gar and paced back and forth across le sitting room with his head up and loulders squared, and the cat made [) her mind that he had either fallen ?ir to a big fortune or had discovered lat one of his ancestors was at the Dim of Noah's ark during a good lure of the voyage. At last he spoke. "Mrs. Bowser," he began, "if you i *c not too busy this evening I should ke your help for a few minutes." "Certainly." she replied. "There was a gentleman in the of- i ?e this afternoon with a book entitled Iistoric Men of America.' As it has 3t been issued yet, of course you have it heard of it. Perhaps I should have lid a proposed book." "Well?" "The idea is to make a book of fiOO iges. The lives of fifty of the most rominent men in America are to be ritten up, and each will fill ton pages. : is to be a very exclusive work, mind in gilt and morocco, and selling >r $10 per volume. I have been se MR. BOWSER TOOK T1IE II ctod as one of the fifty to bo written P." 'Yes." "And I want yea to help me recall le leading incidents of my life ami lake a little sketch for the historian > go by." "How much is it going to cost you?" Lie asked. "I take ten of the books at $10 each, [e would have been glad to write me p free of cost, but of course we want t least ten of the books. He came all tie way* from Boston to see me. and bould 1 repeat one-half the nice things e said you would think me coneeitd. Let us see what we can get up. ou know 1 ay life as well as I do myelf." Mrs. Bowser drew a long breath, >oked at liim in pity, and after a mojent's thought she said: "Well, at the age of ten years, which ? probably j:oir.g back far enough, you tore kicked in the stomach by a cow lid laid up for two weeks, as you have ften related. That is the beginning f your history." "Woman, do you mean to insult me?" ia? ft-.-/.l-iMMori rm ho (hishod ill). "Of course not. If this is to be a Misery of you. we must get in all the inidents. JJon'l the histories of Wellington record the cherry tree incident? 'lie next thin? to happen to you was vhen you were twelve years old; you ell into the family cistern." "Are you talking in sarcasm?" he isked as ho glared at her. "Not at all. Every history of every rreat man goes back to his boyhood. - <- tt . .. ,,v.l don't we reau rnai h'iuht reM-m-w ?i rat from the jaws of n dog whon lie ,vas only four years old? All these arly incidents are supposed to have a joaring on a man's character. Let me tee; at fourteen you fell in love for he first time and wanted to commit suicide by swallowing a box of blu ing because the girl played tag with j ^ another boy." "By thunder, but you want to make i ?7 out that I'm an ass!" shouted Mr. Bow- J al j ser as lie bobbed around on bis chair. ! "Nothing of the sort." she smilingly j 9^ j replied. "You were making history at t I a very youthful period, and it should j ! all go into the book. At fifteen, as 1 i ! have often heard you say, you attend- ? ed your first circus, and a camel ate ^ up your hat. At sixteen you fell in love ^ with your Aunt Margaret and wanted | her to elope with you. At seventeen"? "Stop!" thundered Mr. Bowser as he ??& brought his fist down on the table witii ^3 j such force as to lift the cat off the [ *atoS floor. "Do you suppose such twaddle i ^ as that is to pass into history? If it did. ! |n | the reader would take me for a fool." "Well, we'll skip a few years then," I Cj ArUio/l Mi*? Rnu'vnf " \ f rho .Mire of I dCj twenty-one you rescued a calf from drowning. It was a very heroic ac- Ja I tion on your part. A few months later tw you challenged a young man to fight ^ j a duel because he called your sweetj heart redheaded, and it was not your fault that he failed to be on the ground. C At the age of twenty-two lightning struck a neighbor's barn, and but for jflfc you a mule would have perished in the flames. A year later"? fy "Hold on!" he hoarsely whispered. Sto "Hold 011 where you are! I might have 3-3 known how things would come out. If you insuit me further, I may forget ? that you are my wife!" $U "But who has insulted you? If you are going to make up ten pages of his- ^3 lorv, tVOU Will iiil \ U IU IJUUivv." not U1 an i mbh the incidents happening in your life. | What has happened to you in the last I gfl twenty years, for instance? You fell in love with and married me, you bought O a hog, you bought a cow. you bought ^ chickens, you bought tire escapes and spring tonics and root beer and run- j Ci away horses and a bike, and you"? j "Madam, go up to your room!" said i dpi Mr. Bowser as he arose and pointed to ! the ceiling. w "But I want to help you to recall." ^ "Go up?go!" ipr "At the age of twenty-three you wanted to hang yourself in the cow- C shed because"? ?j "i say go; ? Mrs. Bowser went It was the only Ja way to avoid a row. She loft Mr. Bowsor pacing up and down and the ends of his hair curling and snapping, hut slie had scarcely reached her room when the doorbell'rang. The historian C had come to see Mr. Bowser about a full length portrait for the book. The historian had stopped at live or six sa- ^4 loons on the way, and ho had arrived with wheels in his head, lie had only got seated in the back parlor when those wheels began to go round, and he looked at Mr. Bowser in a helpless ^ way and asked: , -vT; ' Are you Mr. Bowsher or?or the other feller? If you are Mr. Bowsher. I don't want to shay nozzing?not a word?but if you are the other feller"? && "Well?" "I want to tell you good zboke?good v <n JI ISTOlilAX BY TIIK NECK. i . j zhoke. Got an old chap on cr string i for a hundred dollars; name's oid Bow, sher, and he's an ass. If he don't give j i it awav to liis wife"? 1 ----- i ! Mr. Bowser rose up and took the Ins- ! 1 torian by the neck and led him down MA | the hall: then, as Mrs. Bowser looked | I over the railing, he opened the door ! . C I and planted his shoe three times : i against future history and turned i away with white face and swallowing j at the lump in his throat. A deep, j mysterious silence settled upon the i \ house for the next hour, and Mrs. Bow- | \ I ser crept softly down stairs to find j I l| him asleep on the lounge and the cat KJ hidden away in the darkest corner. ! Ilis ten page history was closed. M. QUAD. | ^ A Drawback. f Opinion, j j | Little Willie j s> < j ?Say, ma. who i ji|r A I in V011 ted the | jjp|f r1 don't know,my \ y | | JgjJf son. but I he- j 1 n ,f i liove the lirst i ',T~~2 I j oac was llis" j v"^' ! covered in a j 5 married man's j fry? pocket address- j V?t 11 n Ohjoc- '' / -'/ <r* tion. j The lhvmrie- J 11} jf^ J tor ?Kut wc *?v/ haven t enough v;ork to k(>op N-/T2*^r another man j , ,, , busy. i "TTow 1 eouhl love riM . , , t rJ lie Applicant dat gal if she wasn't j _oh> j (lonM j such a pronounced mind t li a t. j n f brunette!"?New York | What I want is Journal. [ a steady job. j i SntDTici/'cSS grwriiiwi% ^gg ^ a WE are ready for the Spring and Summer ?J buyers. Our stock is complete with all the E?J ?| LATEST THINGS OF THE SEASON S m Our net spot cash system of buying ami selling, 8 coupled with experienced buyers, places us in a position to offer prices that few can meet. jntti We invite you to inspect our stock when in Colum- 2r ? 8^ hia. It won't cost you anything and may save you some hard earned American Dollars. 9 By a special deal we are enabled to offer H QwwU &VL&JXanttSWi fi> OUUiO gg ^ at extra special prices. gjgj SOur ? 10.00 Suits for Men arc made of the BEST S3 8 MATERIAL and by the best workmen. For ?5.00 we can give you a suit fit for anybody to wear. 1,000 pieces line Flowered Organdy, special, at 50c. ?*$ 2 per yard. * 1,000 dozen King's Spool Cotton at l?c. per spool. j5| 5,000 pairs Men' Mixed Wool Trousers at 25c. a pair ?T5 t? " -iii l . /* ii I i A c _ l Jm M it. y we will he prepared to oner one 01 tne largest ;uaiSaga Hats for men. at 10c. each. We have contracted for 25 cases and will be 50 per cent, under the market cjQ Son these famous hats. Thousands of good things to show you. gjfcf 8 Thanking the readers of the Dispatch for their lib- 5^3? eral patronage in the past and soliciting a continuance of the same. I am the purchaser's friend, g 163S AND 1640 MAIN ST., ?COI."JMBIA, S. C.?? Goods of all descriptions are the only kind kept in stock in our new store, and those who wish to purchcase the latest novelties in Fall and Winter IY Q060S, NOTIONS AND MILLINERY. as cheap as the same class of goods can be purchased elsewhere, should inspect this stock before purchasing. Honest values for your money is our guarantee, so if your want to buy goods that will prove to be just as represented, give us a call and you'll not be disappointed. WM. PLATT, IN STREET, NEARLY OPPOSITE POST OFFICE, COLUMBIA, S. C. ictober, 9 ?3<n. oath Carolina Mali irks. 1707 MAIN ST., COLUMBIA, S. . ?The Largest Retail IgpMARBLE AND GRANITE | Dealers South. We use the best grade material in manufacturing ^ jy[li Monuments and Headstones and guarantee our wor< and r^o^f:'v ttinish to he the best. Wben you hear a man compiaining that he can bay so much cheaper trom some HP little fellow who is anxious to sell auythmcr, vou Wr can put it down that he will get cheap stock, cheap work, and ol course a cheap job. Sh >tE4'R'* Pi V/e can compete w ith any lair dealer ln country, but we cannot . -?grade stock anil tl o shah by work. - ? ? a rn fA s\ r\!r? -/ ( Tiinri r-i ON i WIREMK, (.Kill K LOT WW,BUS, for sale. Write to us or see our MR. P. R. EDWARDS, LEXINGTON, S. C. and we will see that you are treated fair. )UTH CAROLINA MABBLE WORKS. jpteniber 1j. 41?tf