The Lancaster ledger. (Lancaster, S.C.) 1852-1905, February 07, 1866, Image 1
y. **
lite Lancaster CeDger.
volume xiv. Lancaster c. h., s. c., Feb., 7, ihgg. number 22.
H3ninarons.
An Unlucky Dutchman.
Those food of m little life history, are
frquested to read tLe following by "Brick''
1'omeroj. Wo rather imagine that Mr.
Sr.iuksnacker ia not tbtf only gentleman
w|*o might ting that aong?
%'Who'a pin here since Ieh pin gone 7"
Uiliflicker Soicksnacker, a Teutonic
Vender of aour krout, wooden eoinb?,
/avail taakha ?
v-.vua^c, niniuni, cotton
' -ftutpender*. Hinl such dings," with
true patriotic real, lull hit home in La
Orotoe at the commencement of the war,
aud enlisted as a slop gfocefy keeper l>?-*
hind a sutler's tent on the Potomac.
When he went away it was with the in
tention of making sortie moblth, if it took
ail summer, and nobly did he light it out
oti hit line Mow he done it in best told
at be related it to us cn bit return last
week t
' 4,Vou ?ee, Mr. Bumroy,der trum pentt,
und der call coomet to go to wart mil
s arnr.t. tte be bstroilsu much ar Shtnei*
al Washburn, or Shenerai Curti?t, or
Rheneral lititler, or RlveU?#?l Bangs, or
..I .1 CJ1 I - ? .
w<* t>i unu ouen?rr?it TO I llTes IO Cottle
liomo ureal men. So I puye iom< little
ilinu* and get* eoine bade re from de war
coin niit tee, and in it ter poja tor pe
bVrote, and ?e'l my little dinge and
in kf *? me m tniab. I kiss my trow fi*e,
n ntleeo dime and g<>ee niit de war. 1
goes ter S'i.?iiil>ersbiirgh, tied make*
much inonUb. I'n day I poke mine
window out un mine head to beer der
aerair.de, and ilink of enmediugt, when 1
a?e dat Shtonewall Sbacfceoo rnit hie
droop* *n.d der pig praaa pai d coining
down der elrt-ei playing like der tyfil on
tier prnee pand,
' "Wfeu'epia here #luce l*h pta gone?"
* Dat Shtonewall Sliackton is ter t) fil
rd!t fiirhiine- uml I i>ui? n.i?? t-l- -
iAine bockei uml mioe liula baper* in
Olio* p?j. UnJ I e? <j-iick as never
vaah to G?ll)bui?. Led dw? I upon*
soma more sbuire unJ sella aoree inure
Utile ill ?^s. AikI von day I beara men
rldin down ter ahtreet like dunder, uod
deo I poke* ter winder under miue bead
uod looks myself up tar ahtreet, und dere
goomee dally fil, Slii<>o e 1 ?!l Shackaon
p ayiag dat same odder tUue aa I beard 1
before,
"Who's pia here since I-*h pin jeno *"
r? _ t ?t. !_ >
i/>M t m i are mine 11toriit11 gum#* inter
i.iiit bockoii?, und uiaket mine pag gome
Inter mine Sapere, unJ but* mm* sign on ,
t?r pit rblore on J?r corner, *o I lore* j
tiior* good* mi ( had not got, and dink* I
goto Wisconsin lo mi mine vrow a* (
baiot reen in de?? two ye*'*, *b toug
lime * never v*th.
l>*n I goouiet home, und knokt und |
dvr door, und my vrow the mak* talk,
Uu<i tell* me ** Whose dar !**
l>eo I ?ay "IMllbkvr Snickaracker,"
und the know* d?t i* mine nauie, und
*he tonka* herself gome cut or ler bouee,
and give* me nine, aeven time* kit* on
lofctw face so *oo<J a* never vaab.
'l'tti Mr. Hutnroy, I look* mit mine
und I tee* soma diog*l And to I '
ask mine vrow if aha'* bin married since ;
I go off to be batriot, und if the no gat
married, why she make* so much grow,
't/ben I be gone milter war* f und
gM* mad as d? tyfil, und den I link* of
dal tamo Stieneral Sliackton, uud bi* pig
bfa?* pand, a lid 1 sing*?
"11%/# pin here since /<1 pingtiuf*
Uad now, Mr. Bumroy, soompody
tnaka trooble* mil roe, for I*e been gone
two years, und I know some dings, und
i ?.- - - -
i jjorn Dues inn cer war, una I sings del
la inn Hlitonewall 8backaon aoog all ter
. *ay "? Iai (Jrout J) t wot rat.
During ilia prevalence of the lata are
nhlar eclipse, an enthusiastic colored ia
dividual became greatly elated. "Braee
da Lord," said be, "nigger'a tinea hab
com* at las?he's free, and now we gwiee
to'bab a black inn."
The road from tba city of tfeiieo to i
Vera Crus is Iia4 on aaeh side with corpses I
Krtry gurrilla is bang as soon as eaugbt: 1
I ami the mere fact of a maa'a having a i
k auepicioua appearance is sufficient to eaui i
tie smnnv.ry rvceutiou. I
r 1
The Showman on the Woodchuck.
Reported verba turn el lileratum from
the Showman's speech at a mettegerie In
Rngland. It was particularly edifyiflg to
his auditors, and may ba to ihany of out
readers I
This ladies and gentleman, is the dis?
tinguished hanimal tich is known as the
Ilamerican Voodchtick, first discovered
by Gen. Christopher Columbus, on his
first voyage to tho woods of llameriky.;
Christonhar saw him nnistlr ? I
, 1 .' ?I
a bank gf clover, a viewing the setting >
eun and a vondering vol vould become
of it. This ere ia Ore of the descendants
of the same voodchiick, as may he seen
by bis genetal happearance, rich is most
beautiful and striking. Lie is a solitary
creechur, and is called voodchuck because
he lives in the ro<>a and the bnya chuck
stones at him. lie has hair upon his
back and upon his belly, and his tail is
much the same. IIia eyes are at the op.
poaite end of the laxly, and assist him in
the amusing occupation of seeing, vich he
can see in the dark as veil as in the light,
helve be vould n't live in oles hunJer the
ground.
Like inoat hanitnated tiling*, he is fond
of enjoying himtels, vich he does in a
very amiable vay. lie chides along up
on the ground, ten nobody ia looking,
vatches the birds in the trees, and tries
to sing like them, vich he has never sue
ceeded it. d ting ; but this is not his fault
because Le hasn't got any fathers. The
voodchuck li*a* a g?u?d vile. My huncle
ad von vat lived sometime, but finally
died ; though there is no telling how long
he vould ave lived if it vasn't for that
re haccident. liowing to ilia <j'iiet life
vich the voodchuck henjoya, I are sometimes
viche 1 I was a voo<lchuck my??f.
Hut then there's not hexcitemenl enough
I'i il for a ilio*U!<D, ibyugh ( can sav, a* j
IItilari<ier rainaikt*d to iiioircnea, bu:f I !
vara not a (bowman, I vould ba a rood
uliui-k !"
liar*, ladiwa attd gantlwwvrw, it tha
wary oaa on vich tha Duka of Vallantina
law tha Lord Napolaou Buonaparte !?
Stir him up Johu and maka him kick a
bit P
A Wonderful Comet.
There i? one of these eccentric *n<]
mysterious mep?bers of ib? solar system
that requires five hundred nnd seventy
two year* in wbicb to make its revolution
ih iu *ery eliptical orbit around the auu.
The drat acctiunl of ita appearance oh
record ia 1,707 y&* before (Jurist, wben
some took it to be the p'anet Venus,
changing ita appearance and course. It
was aaan tbe second time 1 193 years
before Chris', and a^ain 1 1 JO vara I in
ter. This last was 43 It. C., the year
after Julius Casiar was killed in the U >
Q ?- * *
mi a u onnaio. il Ktl certainly teen A. j
IJ. 530, the fifth year of '.he Roman 1
Emperor Justinian.
The aoruuBt it tliMt * remarkable coinel
waaaeen twenty daya in lite month of
September, ami that for aoma tint? after ,
the aun appeared pale. It vat due again ,
in A. I). 1105, and early in the following
year it wna teen. Ita laat appearance i
waa in 1680, Sir Itaac Newton and othera
give an inlercating account of ita ve- <
lociiy, heat, dec. Tn'ia comet has been
gone one hundreJ and eighty fire yeara,
and will reijuRe about one hundreJ and i
two yeara before it reaclu-a the fartheal ,
point of ita orbit, and iu gr-a^eat distance
from the aun. It will be due bere again
in lit* ye*r j 0.
This wonderful comet, as we have said
was seen 1,707 years 11. C\, and it must I
Lav* appeared 675 years before that, |
wbicb would bave bean 2 340 B. (J., or i
ail days after ike flood in the days of i <
Noab. Ita previous vjiit to our system '
most hare been 2.917 II. C, and before 1
that, according to our chronology, was I
the creation, Tina lacks sixty two years i
of tbe time requisite for tbe comet to \
make a complete revolution??o that at |
tbe Creatioa it might hare been placed
at a distance from the sun equal to what I
it could hava moved in sixty three yearaIt
is probably now making the eleventh 1
revolution in ita orbit. IIow great and
raarvalious are the works of the Almigh' Jl
* I
Great Men of the Past
A correspondent of a Chicago journal,
who has lately rifled the national capital,
pay a an eloquent tribute to the three
great men whose presence and influence
are now eo sadly missed in the halls of
Congress. We can easily imagine the
emotions of au old visitor of the Capitol,
who, alter many years, comes liack to
that niagniGcent structure, but niisees
that which was its chief glory, the illut
trious statesmen, whose broad, Atlantean
shoulders were tilted to bear the burthens
of empire. Aichitectural skill may raise
a more gorgeous editlce than that of the
simpler davs of the ltenuhlio t.??
is tlie 1'roiuetliKan spark that *>limII re I
lunte the light of those fires of genius
which once made it the glory of the
earth } The casket inay he more spleodid,
hut the gems which gave it its chief
valun have ceas?d to shine.
There was something even in the pen
onal presence of Webster, Calhoun and
Clay which attracted the observation of
a stranger. The massive form of Webster,
the imperial brow, the solemn 'repose
of the classic features, 1 i* up by those
lustrous, cavernous eyes ; the iron phv?i
que of Calhoun ; the graceful, spirited,
chivalric person of Clay, challenged the
attention of strangers visiting the Senate.
It needed no one to point them out to
those who diJ not know them. The
hand of Nature bad stamped upon each
the ugjpistakable mark of inuu born to
lead and command. When they grap
pled each other in debate, it wait a war
of giaal* Yat, it is a remarkable fact
tliat these, *.ne three greatext Americana
that have lived in the modern days of lb?
Republic, were never elevated to tbe
Presidency. If they were ambitious to
obtain the h igheat bouora of tbe Kepub
lie?aud no one bad a belter ri^bt to in*
Julys auch aspirations?'bey went down
to the grave disappoints I men, and, ao
far aa their personal elevation to the
highest otbcial dignities waa concerned,
might ae well have been subjects of a
European monarchy as citizens of tbe
American Republic.
Undoubtedly, the career which each
ran, long ao brilliant in fame and indu
euce, was sadly darksned towards its
close. The sun, which has risen so nu
apiciomdy, ami traveled in such might
atid splendor through the firmament,
went down ab?rn of its bright Uass and
enveloped by melancholy clouds. Kultt
uraa the disappointment of a deeper and
nobler paaaton than personal ambit on
tbat darkened the Uat day a of the moat
illuatrioua patriota of a former era. Their
prophetic viaioti beheld the calamine*
which were impending over their coun
try, and whoever efae tuay have been
blind to the aigna of the coming atorm, no
one can deubt that the experienced ma>
rinera who had ao long airoggled to avert
felt, with a pang aa keen as that of J
death, that the labor of their lives wae
mn/4 lLa I liaia 1 J!
..... ? luncrai Uirgee
would scarce have ceased before (be abip
of State would go to piecea, and tba roar !
of the breakers aing a nation's requiem.
If tbeae great and patriotic Americana
could once more re viait the scenes of
their ancient renown, how would they
struggle to bind up tbe wounds which the
war has trade, and to build that Union
which Hieir lives illustrated upon fnunda
lions which tbe vicissitudes and convul
liona of tima could never change.
What *t Cosre to Slap a Neoro ?
Time?Yesterday morning. Scene? j
Butcher *nd darkey in Fifth street mar
kst bouse. Butcher hired darkey, who !
got I art end aaucj. Butcher told darkey j
to do something?he refused.?Butcher
drove inm off. tie came hack?butcher
ilapped him. Darkey aaul, MI)at'll coet
you sumtbin,n and weot oft Returned
by aod by with e musket and a negro
attached to it?seised butcher, who drop* (
pad his cleaver, put soins money ir bis
picket And "fell toto line." Freedmea's
Bureau?butcher before it?darkey told .
bis wrongs?hureaa smiled?butcher
looked meat aces?didn't do no good ?
lift and costs?dismissed tba case.
Butcher likee negroes?negroes liks
butchers?bureau likes both.
t ?
jAurvrrffft uemocrat.
#
What Young People Should
Know.
The bast inheritance which parent* can
give their cfdldren is the ability to help j
and take care of themselves. This is bet* | jr
ter than a hundred thousand dollars a> | tl
piece. In any trouble or difficulty, they c<
hare two excellent servants in the shape H
of two hands. Tlwaae who can do nothinjr,
"I'd have to l>e waited upon, are .
help'est and easily disheartened in the Hl
misfortunes of life. Those who are ac- m
live and hardy meet troubles with h ?
cheerful face, and easily surmount tbun. |c
(.uf r/.tinr* txAMivU ' -- ' - * *
jvu..s iiinrnuiv, lb<(rn lO (1(1 0(
a? many things as possible. tl
K?ery^Lov should know, sooner or 0
later? t|
1. To dress himself, Mack his own j,
boots, cut Iiis brother's hair, wiud a watch,
sew on a button, make a bed, and keep e
the clothes in order. w
2. To harness a horse, grease a wagon B(
and harness a team. , |
3. To cartre fowls and meatj and wait ^
on the table. B,
4. To milk the cows, shear the sheep j?
and dress a real or mutton. j
5. To reckon money and kesp accounts
correctly, aud according to book-keeping e
rules. I,
0. To write a neat and appropriate f(
briefly expressed business letter in a good
hand, fold and supersenbt it properly, w
and write Contracts.
7. To plow, sow grain and jgrase, drive ?
a mowing machine, build a neat slack u
and pitch liar. ,j
8. To nut up a package, build a fi'e, ,,
mend a broken tool, whitewash a wall tl
and regulate a clock.
Kvery girl should kuow Low? tl
1. To tew ami knit. ii
2. To mend clotLea neatly. ll
3. To make Led*.
4. To dress bar own hair. L
5. To waali the distiee and sweep the n
carpels. n
G. To make good bread and perform ti
plain cookirg. n tl
7. To keep her room, drawers and c<
closeu in order. ?
8. To work a tewing machine. w
9. To make good butter and cheese. ' w
10. To make a dress and children's : is
clothing. j
11. To keep aceoueta and calculate in- ! ''
i ^
(crest.
12 To write, fold and superscribe letters
properly.
13. To nurse the tick effectually, and 1
not to f?inl at the eight of a drop bf j
blood.
14. To be ready to render efficient aid J
to thote in trouble, and in an uiiotleiila-1
! ,r
tiout war.
Ol
15- To receive and entertain visitors in i
the absence or atchnct* of her mother.
A young lady who can do all thece
thing* well, and who ia aiways ready to a
render aid to the atHicled and militate
th* perplexities of thove around Iter, will ! *'
bring more comlort to other* aiid happi |
nes* to herself, and he more esteemed, C<
than if *he k uew how to dance, simper, !
ing sod play on the piaaa. ,
An army chaplin relates the following ! '
story : Seeing a dirtyifaced buttefnul J
archin at the fence in front of a house, |
the preacher stopped and said t "Is your K
father at home!" "Not he's gone to ! ^
church." "Is your mother in f ' "No; 1
she's gone too." "The* you're sll by ' *1
yourselt}" "No; brother Sam's in tliar 141
huggia' the nigger gal." "That's bad'.", m
"Yes it's bad, but it's the boat he can k
do r
, |, m at
A Ricn 1 >ai.k ar Oottok ?Many at
cotton bales arriving in New York have at
to b? overhauled, d rt and stained cotlyn M
thrown out, sud tbeo rebated. The other ! in
dav, two laborers, in the dischsrge of | w
tiii* rliaftv f/?a??/l ? i- -1 - - ' "
>uau<l, > Ull? U1 |U> U?l(?, 1 1(1
$'27,000 iu gold. One of then) propped ' t><
to tbo otber to divide nod ke*p mum, but . in
tho other mid bo would report to the | l><
"bo to." The purchaser of tho roll on I y.
claimed tbe gold, and tbo ?ollor eUunrd In
it, becauee tbo cotloo woo not delivered, *i
and for other reMiae; and probably tbo to
court will docido to whom this ricb mino hi
belong*. Tbo purchaser goto (ho two w
laborer* $100 each in greenbacks. li
Singular Case of Trance.
A lady residing within sixteen miles of
.aleigh, who has besn in delicate health
nee she lost her husband in 1663, died
isl Friday (as was supposed) and friend^
i the neighborhood proceeded to take
te steps usual on such occasions. The
oil!n was ordered, the corpse shrouded
nd laid od?, and all needful preparations
msummaled for the funeral ceremonies
i&t Sabhath. Strange a6 it may appear
is said that while the watches in an
djoining room were indulging in hilarity
nd hot cotfea, a noise w?s heard m the
part.nent where the remains ??f the he,
>?eJ departed reposal. Supposing a cat
r rat was paying pranks therein, a genOman
w?ot to atop the revelry. On
pelting the door he whs horrified to find
iu lady standing in the floor, the very
iCHriiHlion ol perplexity. The brave
illow hastily retreated, hit demonstrations
xcited the rest of the party, and the
hole crew, shrieking and trembling, de?
rrting the house for a season. An elderr
negress, more courageous than others,
ent into the dwelling, ascertained the
late of afl'airs, and with Christian heroin
ministered to the necessities of the
ead live one.
Search wa* then made for the retreat
r?, who being found at a neighbor's, re
irned to the domicil they had so shaino
illy abandoned.
I>r. Hell, formerly of O'eenville, S. C.,
ho has attended the lady during the
ast six months, assures us that these are
nvHrnished facta and present no new
uihs to the medical profession. !t was
iiijhj a ca*a oi trance or suspended aniinlion.
Ttie only remarkable circuin
lance, perhaps, is the duration of the
pall, though after Iter presumed decease,
1a absence of that perfect icy ties* which
> peculiar to '.ha d?ad waa remarked by
li? physician aa wall aa her friend*.
Tha lady is now able to ait up, and
emg in tha lsst stages of consumption,
i aa well as alia will aver bis. She re
ieml>era very little of the hours of her
ranee, but expeiieiiced an almost painful i
nrst iu tha first moments of returning |
anaciouanese. Altogether it is a remarkb'e
event to the people not acquainted
itii medical history. A doctor, to whom
a made mention of the affair has prora
cd to furnish us for publication, at an
srly day, a statement of h far more ex
aordinaiy esse, which happened in
rrwiiviilu county a few years since.
Raleigh Progrett. j
Losses by Uoligion.
Near London there dwelt an old couple,
1 early life they had been poor, hut the
ushnttd hefHMfl a Christian, and God
leaaed their industry, and they vera Itv I
ig in a comfortable retirement, when |
t-e day a stranger called on them to ask '
leir subscription to a charity. The old !
dy had leas religion than her husband, j
nd still hankered after the Sabbath'
uskinga and easy shillings which Thoin |
t had forfeited from regard to the law of!
od. So when the visitor asked their
intributious, she interposed, and said :
M\Voy, sir, we have lost a deal by region
since we first began ; ray husband
nows that very w?IL Liave we not, I
boinas I"
After * colemn pause, Thomas answei*
1 : "Yes, Mary, we have, before 1 .
ot religion, Wary, I had an o!d slouched
at, a tattered coal, and mended shoes j
rid stockings ; hut I have loallbem long 1
go. And, Mary, yon know that, poor
i I was, I had a habit of getting drunk
nd quarreling with you, aid that you'
now I havo lost. And then, 1 had a
ardened conscience and wicked ho art, ;
mi ten thousand guilty fears; but all
re lost, completely lost, and like a tuill
one cast into the deepest sea. And,
lary, you have bean a loeer, too, though
jt ?o great a loser as myself, before
? got religion, Mary, you had a wa?h
ig 'ray, in which you waflied for hire; 1
ill since then you have lost your wash* '
?T traV. An.I von t.?.t ? ?? -- 1
r, ~ -
>nnet much the worse for ?e?r; but
j?i have lost them long ago. And yot? 1
&.1 many an aching heart concerning me
L times; but these you happily have!
*t. And I ecu Id even wish that >ou
ad loel as much as I hnve lost; for.
hat we lose for religion witP^be arwever
itting gain."
Interceding for Mr. Davis.
The Fortress Mouroe correspondent of
tiie Hostou Traveler writes :
4 One of the privates of the 20th Maine
regiment, who settled in North Carolina
afier the close of the rebellion, has reach*
ed here on his way to Washington to in
tercede for ll.e pardon of Jeff. Davis,
having traveled on foot to Norfolk, it
seems '.hat he was found in the rebel
lines, captured, carried to the rebel headi
quarters, tried and convieted of being a
spy, and sentenced to be huog. lie asked
to be allowed to write to Mr. Davis,
anil the request was granted. Having
some doubts, however, ef the intention
of his captors, he bribed the rebel waiter
to take another letter, and through a eer?
vant of the household of the rebel President,
it reached him. The rertilt wai
that a messenger was dispatched with an
order for the Yankee soldier to be taken
immediately to the President's house.?
Upon his arrival the guard was dismissed
with an order to return. It seeius that
while Jeff and wife tarried at Portland,
previous to the war, this soldier rendered
Mr. D., some service, which he acquitted
by saving the life of the soldier. Now
the latter is on his way to intercede for
his deliverer.
Tiik following racy examination of a
candidate for admission to tLe bar is taken
from lh? Wtit tern Imio Journal, and it
decidedly a good bit:
The examination commences with :
"1 >o you smoke, air!"
"I do, air."
"Ilnre you a spare cigar f"
"Yes, sir," (extending a abort six.)
"Now, sir, what is the first duty of a
lawyer I"
"To collect fees."
"Kight. What ia the second t"
"To increaso the number of liis clients." %
"When does your position toward your
client change ?"
"When making a bill of cost."
"Explaiu."
"\Y? tbea occupy the autagonist'o
position ; I assume lb* plaintiff, and be
becomes defend ant."
"A suit decided, how do yon stand
with the lawyer conducting the other
bill r
"Cheek by jowl."
"Enough, sir ; you promise to become
nn ornament to your profession, and I
wish you success. Now, are you aware
of the duty you owe me }"
"Perfectly/*
"Describe it/*
"It is to insite you to drink."
"But, suppose, I decline?"
(Caudidaie, scratching bis bead.)
"There is 1.0 insianc? i?f ili? lr?n/i n?
record in books. I cannot anawer the
question."
"Vou are right; and the confidence
with which you make the assertion show#
that you have read the law attentively.
Let's take a drink, and I will sign your
certificate."
Who's Hit f?The Columbus (Ga.)
San aaya ; All of our citizen* who take
the oh'.Ii of allegiance are required to
state their political opinions in 1800. On
the books in the commandant's office the
Union signer* largely predominate. Capt.
Gohle, ?o the *lory ruua, wa? looking over
the list, when he would *ee for a whole
page the name* of secessionist* as scarce
m I innit 1.?.'. ?- ?W_ U-J >>?
n? U?l? ICOUli i\M y uuu 1 91'
claimed be. after reading awhile, "if these
fow ' e(e?h* caused us all this trouble for
the past four years, what couldn't they
have done if all these Union men had
joined them.'* We give the story as we
heard it.
? HIO ?
Tiik Fmer Bwilic Kvkr Printed.?
In the royal library of Berlin is a copy
of th? tiral Bible that was ever printed, a
venerable aud ready magnificent book.
It is printed on parchment, is aboet
equal iu s'te to the largest pulpit Bibles
which am now pr.nted, and is said to be
the tiisi book iu which moveable t) pea
were Used.
"i>o you like codfish bells, Mr. Wig* /
gin r Mr. Wiggin, hesitatingly?"I
really don't know, Miss, I never recollect
attending one "