Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page. It is also available as plain text as well as XML.

. - - ? -v.-' ; * tlif fim r&t&rr i|J|^JV ilJI^Jv %% ^ A|JvJv V r??? ?iJLu UL_ii?? irrrw-1 it? i ? iiju_i_ji. _ l i mi i m i i rn i m ?ut~\ ?? ^???? _., 1tmmmm_)____________^ N 5 .. . ? . . ----- $2 PER ANNUM IN ADVANCE ? 1 family nail political AJciusiinprt?fltuulri) in tin Arts, Smarts, jCitaatuu, it'ilutaiiou, Agrirullurt, Sntrrnnl Smptnutrarnta, i'nrtijn anil Fnaitslit items, nuii tfjt Jttnrktts. VOLUME Vi. LANCASTER. C. II.. SOUTH CAROLINA, WEDNESDAY MORNING. SECT, ii, 13.57 NUMBER 32. ? tdrrtrii itnnj. 11 A R 1) T I M E S , OE, THE PHILOSOPHER S STONE. IIV OL1VKU Ol'TlC. CHAPTER I. 'WliHt makes you look so dull this morning, Ellen?' inquired Mr. Chester, a merchant in a small way, of his wife. They had been married ah rut a year, and tliUM t<l liol an ill-nallmcd Wind had been spoken by them. At his marriage, Chester had taken a smalt but neat aud convenient house, in the upper pari of ihu city, lie had been able lo furnish il in a plain manner; but sinciv Ins marriage, in* uusiuesa i>i aii'iiil many articleo ol luxury t<? his small o.-.t;rl?!isliinertt. Tli<5 'times' li 'd beyuu to lighten up, however, hikI business was dull. The notes were due, ami be bad to bestir bun. self to make his payments. Fortunately for hini. however, as the stringency in tliu money market began to we'gh tuosl lieav ilv, Ins father's adininistrator placed biin in possession of two thousand dollars, which bad been resetted to await tlm con tiugency of a law suit, and which bad now la-en satisfactorily settled. Willi litis sum be had been enabled to pav oil bis more pressing demands, and * to iny up a surplus of lite hundred dollars to meet a no o which would fall due some two months hence. The receipt of this sum also induce-! bint to increa?e the i..- i . . . IUAMI I\:r ui 111:* I IH' JKUiOT (UKI u> t o newly furnished, an I the old parior furniture in the sitting room.? Tlies had every thing that was tie. ussnn hi eoinlmi, or creditable appearance in ilio world. 'V'ni look very dull,' ooiitinued the husband, a> l.o arose from tlie breakfast l*?hie. Kl.en look.d al liim with a languid miu.. . I.iii in ute no reply. "Wlii a i oU ?' "1 a as thinking lioiv lonesome I should he hole at dill," lepiied she. "I.oi.i's >iiie ! Why ilon't \<>u go out, ll.eii, ami lake (he air I Walk down Wili ng mi street, and mound ihu coinloon?ji ni | reiivu your spni 'lion a Mild you talk! Walk leiuid llo- o>iitiiii' n in the month ot llecembei ! W !i\. I should freeze to death.' \..i .... I....I .I.-. ' i... i .1. . no kimif M I'dVI UK" \ Ul(|i J,J itii -loiiul, i-luit king lus w iI'm utnliT the t'.iin. *(>. lo tilt: Allil-.tU- ..11 ..li i n't' iii>i.it-: iirt-H.' 'I couldn't tin (h it every day, hih! you tlnti'l know koii lonesome 1 uin.' 'Can't \ tin read ?' -i tl. i. L want to read ill llie time.' 'II. r?ti |i:.|( nt tin* t'llic. then.' 'Hui, K ifil, I have I n't* ii thinking ot Something,' itlui a Mi.in- played njioti tlio j-retty lijis ?>l tin* \oung wile. w hat, e hi. r M miss something ill our house.' 'I).?you 1' u t . i : i it v/, vary 111 ui*11 iiitieeti. 'Well, Ellen, wlmt is it ?' 'A piano; it would be ?o nice to practice, these lone, dreary day*. I should be as lutjipy as a princess it I on'y had a piano.' M.s. Chester's father whs in affluent c roil instances, and before she was mar ried she had been acv ttstoiiied to ioa.it luxuries, which h r hosb.nd'* limited means would not pciuiil linn to provide. Hut, Ehen, 1 can't afford a piano.? '1 he limes have Hot been an hard before for the-e ten yeais ' 'VoU hate ^ot lite hundred dollars in the hank.' 'Hut, dear, I hut a reserved that to ; s\ a note 1 Don't you expect to tnuke enough t< tt r?j .li 'II u very doubtful; my business hardly 'You will be able to pay tliat, 1 know,' continued the eloquent petitioner. 'Well, wait, iny dear, you shall have tbe piano.' 'You are h dear luuUnd. You will get me one of Chickering's V Any kind you please, mv dear.' And U f..re dinner time the instrument came home, and Mrs. Chester was as hanpv as a piano eoul.l make her, albeit she had little idea of the sigiiilieMi.ee of 'three per cent, a month,' and protested uotes. CHAl'lhR II. Men sain the limes would be better, but the prophecy was vain. Merchants tailed, brokers filled, banks slid insurance companies failed. Jlusiiiess was duller that it had teen for the last twen iy year*. l'uur men lounged at the cor ner* of the streets, vainly wailing f<-r h jol*, while their wives nnd children shiv eretl with the cold, itud hungered even for h crust of bread. Kuio and distress w,*ro the order of the day, and men wondered where wouid be the end of it all. Fred Cheater's business did not pay his shop expense*, to say nothing of his household, nod when that dreadful note fell due, he had not a dollar towards redeeming it. Hum stared him in the face, and it was now Ins turn to look sad. Five hundred dollars was a *majl sum, yet he could not raise it. Kven three per cent, a month without 'collateral,' would not procure it. Something mus*, he done. Some friend must gel hun out of the scrape, or be must certainly fail, ilis wile's father was wealthy, but he married his daughter against his wishes, ami there was no hope in that quarter. Itut hilen's uncle, a Muni, honest master mason, had always looked kindly upu* hiui, % and perhaps lie would open his purse i strings. The note was due on the following day, and he decided to make the application I to Uncle Luke, as he was familiarly called. In the course of the afternoon, how; ever, he lutppeneJ to call at the store, j and Fred stated his position *Kh I' said the hlunl ulu yicchanic. 'I i thought things were going on swimmingly with you.' i 'So they were, hut the times are so very hard that 1 cannot make enough to hjiv iivtmitcuo 1 u?? - -? * voj?vnr.?of irjMiai 1' Ttfll # Willi IX UUlOT ??us expression of countenance. \N acre's (In- iwo thousand dollars you roci.iv cd hoin jour father's estate ?' '1 paid my debts with it.' Mini didn't ton tell ine that you didn't owe above throe thousand dollars ?' 1 paid oir lifteon hundred.' 'A ud the rest!' "Well, that wont in various ways.' 'And your s.ock is all mortgaged f1 Yes, for one thousand.' 'You have done a good business }' 'Yes.' 'Well, well, I am in a hurry just now, ' but 1 will go up and dine with you, and j we will talk it over,' and Fred and Uncle Luke went out of the shop. Fred did Dot like bis uncle's inquisi- i ! tiveness, but he had strong hopes that ho would help him out of his present ?iitlij cullie*. Writing a hasty note, lie dts ! ! patched ins hoy t?> inform liis wife that Uncle Luke would dine with them. CI IAl'TKIi III. l>innor came, and so did Uncle Luke. Ivh'ti li.td a nice dinner ready, ai d her 1 jir?-11y face was covered with smiles when 1 she welcomed the honest old man to par* take (if t!i< iiiHpilnhly of her hoard. I nek Luke seated himself at the la- , hie. II s acc.:-touted smile had dis ?ppea red, and lie looked rather Stem. Fred,'.-aid lie, sc. iv, as the young uiercbtr.it inserted t t in the hi east of a nil | \ hrow m d .nikcy, 'you have not found l.e phi ie M o istone vet.' Fied Mi?pi tided tin* operation of carv| ii-tT the .i i ke)', and g ,/. d with a look I i ot iisloio-lainenl full .a the t.ice *?f tlie ' spe >kxi. '\\ hat do you me in, Uncle Luke ?' he : asked, 'You don't know \! at iho pliilosu- > nlivi > sto.ie a, do Vo l No.' '! Vaiel t < ut when I wasouiie young, and what j<rosj>eriiy lias crowned me, I owe to ih ?i.' l'lay explain, Unch* Lllke.' 'After dinner I will.' Soinehoa, ni spite ol t'ne extraordinary | I pieparation- Ellen had made for the re- I ; cej lion ot her unch , the dinner iid not pass oft Very pleasantly. There wa* a tescive onshis part, which threw cidd xxa ler on the whole all iir. But it was tinislied at last, to the relief of all. I 'Now, Uncle, come into tine parlor, and Kl'en shall play vou a tune or two on her piano,' sai I Fied, leading the way. 'tin her what t' said the old man, with a start of suiprise. i 'Oil her niano. of course-' 'Then you keep ' piano i' *C? i tiuulj; we could not po??.il?ly get | along without one, could we, Ellen !' j ' Hi ho, it's Mich a comfort.' 'Sin li n luxurv, vou mean,' answered Uu. le Uk.'. ?iili a col?l sneer, 'what did ! y oil give for it if' 'Foe hundred.' 'Is it pa.d loi f 'Certainly it is.' * Ami your note due U> morrow which j von cannot meet.' Tied glanced at Elleli, who looked as woe lu'-irtiiic i?5 if she had lost every : friend *\e liu.l .1; 1I1C world. It whs i.<>t Ins fault, uncle; T teased it , , OUt ttf ll.UI,' HititI ?l??. I lien lie is a hij/ger fool than I took him to he,' said Uncle Luke, eontempiu otisly. 'And when he in not doing busi lies* to pay expenses, VOll dine on roast lurkev, and all manner of fancy stutF.' 1 lu- L'ike, though Conscious that he was ii>i-'idling with that which did not , concern linn, could not control his indig ; nation at the wanton extravagance of the young people. He fell kmdlv towards I them, as he always had, and though his won', were harsh and cold, lie intended to do them a kindness. 'Via, and KIUmi, yen wear a silk gown for every day, and to crown all, you have got a piano. Do vou expect to pay your notes in this manner V continued he.? 'Here is the secret of hard tiiii>M?extra* agatice?silk dresses, roast turkeys, ice creams and pianos,' 'Thing* weie going on well with nie when I liouglit the piano,' Fred. * No matter; you are a fool. Now I will tell you what the philosopher's stone in.' Well, uncle, what i* it?' 'Live within your means. If you can earn hut a dollar, spend only seventy five 1 cents,' ami Uncle Luke put on his great coat ami edged for the door, without even alluding to the important topic in which Fred felt so much interest. 'Hut, Uncle Luke, can you lend me the money I want?' asked Fred, dismayed a* the thought of failure. 'No, I cannot.' v 'Then I must favl.' i 'Vou ought to have thought of that when jou bought the piano,' replied Uncle Luke sternly. I?<> you know Waters) 'The carpenter !' 'Yen. Apply to bill), and he will lend you the money.' 'But he is almost a "anger to me.' 'No mntier, go to him,' aud Utide Luke left the house. 'O, Fred, this is all tny fault,' said Iillen, bursting into tears. Fred applied to Waters. 'What security can you give?' asked the carpenter. 'I don't know,' said Fred doubtingly. 'Mv slock is mortgaged.' ? 'Household furnituie ?' ' No.' 'What have you got }' 'A piano, and 'That will do, give me a hill of sale of mat. It not paid within tliitty days the piano is mine.' Fred assented, and received the money. The papers were executed, and Kied got out of Ins ddlicullictt. 1 hiring the succeeding thirty days ho tried hard to raise the nioiiei to redeem the piano, without suecess. Waters took it til tin- appointed lime, and seemed perfectly satisfied with his bargain. A few day* after, the voting couple were surprised to receive an invitation to dine with Uncle Luke, and to their as tonisliilient when they ill lived, they found (heir piano in his little parlor. Did you huy this j' Hut uncle Luke would answer no oneslions, yet he promised to lit ike llieiu a present ol it as soon as he paid all Iris dehts. The dinner consisted of corn beef anil baked potatoes, with an apple pie for do sert. Uncle Luke was in unusually good spirits, and never once apologized he the singular fare he had placed before his gtn-sts. But they tinders*ood the meaning of it. It was intended as a lefsotl for them and they profited by it. They brought homo the philosopher's stone, and begun to live hv a humbler system. I he hired gill was discharged, and lvh-ti had so much to do in attend wig to her household duties, tnat viie ItHil no time to be lonesome, and lhc\ were much happier tout, w hen she mope I all day in the iiatloi ; ami better than this, the times begun to men I, ami KieilV business j?r* spcred ao-nn. lie paid oil' his mortgage, and the piano was duly returned to them. A SCHOOLMASTER "BOARDING HOUND" Extract from th. J urnal of a Veiinoul pn per t Monday? W til 'o bo it>l at Mr. ll's.J had a bake 1 goose for ltntieij supposed irotll lis tio: III .ck oi lis skl??, Itlld utlirr veiii'uMi1 :tI*1 ?'*-*''mees, t?? l> ?*? one of the lir-1 settlers of \ > i mi>tii; made a slight impress.on un tin- patriarch's breast. Supper ? Cold sfmwo and |? ?t ? t family COUslslll g id the : : it 11, good Wile, daughter l'eggy, lour hoys, 1'oiupey, the ilojj, nml it brace ?>1 cats; tin l>ti>.i in the square room about i) oY oik, am! a pile td wood lay l>v the fireplace; saw I'cgoy aerate 11 lier liugeis, ami couldn't take '.lie hint?ft It squeamidi about the stomach, and talked ut u<iiu,j to bed; J'eggv looked sullen, and put out the the in the square room; went to bed, and dreamed ot having eaten a quantity of stone wall. Tuesday ? Cold gamier lor breakfast; swamp tea ami some nut eako, the latter s.iine consolation. 1'inner?I lie leys, etc., of the gander done up waiin; one nearly dispatched. Snpjicr? the oihei leg. Arc., cult); went tubed as lVggv wacarrying in the the to ilie square room; orcauieit 1 was a iiiiiiI turtle, and ?t on my hack aini conid not get over again. NV edncsday?Co'd gander lor break fast; complained of sickness, ami c<>ul?l eat nothing. I)iiiin:r? Wing*, ?k , of the the guilder warmed U| J did ill) host to destroy them lor tear they should he left for slipper; did not succeed; dreaded tile supper all tlic aln inoon. Supper?Hot Johnny cake>; fel* greatly revi.ed.ainl thought 1 had got clear of the gander; went to bed for a good night's rest; disappointed; verv cool night, and couldn't keep warm in bed; got tip; stopped the broken window with my coat and vest; no use. froze the tip of my nose hefofe morning. Thursday?Cold gander again ; felt V??IV nilicli iliki'/\urn.fo.l ?.? " 1 - J OVW ^.IIDICI not linlf gone; v\out visiting for dinner and supper; slept abroad, and had pleas ant dreams. Friday ? ltreakfaal abroad. Dinner at Mr. It's.; cold gamier and hot potatoes; last very good; ate three, ami went to school quite contented. Supper?Cold gander and no potatoes; bread heavy and dry; bad (ho headache and couldn't oat. Peggy much concerned; had a fire built in the square room, and thought she and I had hotter sit there out of the noise; went to bed early; Peggy thought too niucli sleep had for the headache. Saturday?Preukfast, cold gander and hot Indian Johnny cake; dm very well; glad to come oft' so. Dinner?Cold gnn <ler again; didn't keep ^<1 <>t?l tins after noon; weighed and found tliHi i had lust six pounds the last week; grew alarmed; had ? l?lk Mill) Mr. 11., and concluded I had boarded out l>ia share. What not to Eat.?A blacksmith who fancied himself sick swould often lease a neighboring physician to give linn relief. The physician knew thai lie waft pertecllv well ; but being unwilling to otltnd him, told him he must be careful of his diet and not eat anything heavy or windy. The blacksmith went off satistied ; but on revolving in Ins own mind whsi kind o| food was heavy or windy, returned lo the doctor, who having lost temper with his patient, said, 'Don't you know what dungs are heavy and windv ?' 'No,' said the blacksmith. 'Why then I'll tell you,' says the doctor ; 'your anvil is heavy, and your bellows ure windy ;d??nt cat either of these, and you wtli do well.' JMionHliiiunuui. Ii*<?u tiio Marion American. THE PALMETTOES IN MEXICO. IIV OSi: OK 1IIK TWO IIINUKKI) NKW SKItlKS NO. II. It was about llie 'JO;!i ol December, 1 S10. til it tlio l'almettoes reiide/.vmiscd jjit Charleston. Tliey encamped at th? race course, three miles above tbe cilv, where they remained abont leu <1 iys.? Tliey were visited every ds\ ut the.r camp by tins lailio and citizens ut Cliaileston 1 remeinber with what interest iliu indies came around our camp tires to witness our awkward atlem|its at coking, an ! witli wbat a grace they eoi ended to 1 eat our Iried potatoes cooked l y soldier bauds. The City of Charleston gave us the rfgimoiititl llog, which w as presented to Col. Itullei, in presence of the regiment, hy T. L'ger 11 .tlchinson, M,r,..r ! Charlesion. Upon our thig gleamed not the stais of union, and the stripes f..r l>cs,hu'. upon its nine folds stood out a siugV- tree ? the sol, desolate and solitary palmetto ? a speaking, historical memorial ol an civnl lnstory. livery people has it n.a l.onal ariiioiiiiil signets fialight with an inspiration of a memory, and its armies go to battle under banners inscribed with them. The traveller wlo> has sailed along the coast ot South Carolina, ha# seen aiong the margin ot the sea the bleak and sad ' palmetto, marking the blue outline wi'li i's lu auch'.ss, le .lless an 1 b*'.reti trunk I'lielo an: tow landscapes that look so desolate as the sandy coast of Carolina, fringed with groves of Palmettoes, The palmetto glows from thirty to forty feet high, and r> seniMes nothing so much ?s a t ill cabbage. It has no iiiilbs or leave and has nothing hut bunchy, thick, short ( XciCMTllCe ot blades Hi the. top '1 lie hulk IS I Oil gh and ug'v. Such is the ex tenor ol the treo? but the interim- \ ields a soft, pleasant and nutritious substance, which is very good for the tabic. It yiel ded much of the food upon which i!i? ^..l,lt...- ..f I... I . I. .. i i ..... .... niv ih-ii'imniu k?-|?i i <lami >oul together. Such iit llie l'alinetio, 1 >i11 it ha* a history which consecrated u in S.nitli Carolina as a sacred tree, an annorial signet of If r soldiery, mid an em { b.ctn of her sovereignty. In Mm, 1770, t" lore t h-chimt'oii of Independence, Sir l'eler l'ark? r, i\u!i a large ll,, came heating down on Caar lu-loii. Without any |lait tioin themselves, the l.'aiolinisuis pre|?aied to give liiin I utile. W itli nothing hut uiiutin, untrained and u skilled, they threw up a itide I 'll of palmetto logs, on Sill livan's inland, and with appieherihion, hut without fear, aw ailed the unequal con tliut. 1 lie tiuainl ami simple historian, who was one of the couih.itauts, thus describes it : | "l he island of sand no longer seemed a dreary waste. Ur-glitcr rolled the hlue water* ol the ocean bcin.ttli the beam, and sweelci i imi rut it i 1 111 - billow* on their Mainly beach. M\ limit rejoiced with the playful ai they li'iijit'il high, wantoning in tin* nir, (.r with Mid ilfii lloume iciurned ag > n, wild, <! ming through tl.cir lucid element. Our work went in j"V. The palmetto trees were brought to iih bv ili'- biueUs in large rafts, id which we constructed !?>r out fort, ail inline.n-C pen, l?o bundled feel long aii'i Asi(?o feel wide, tilled with snud to ?;op tin? shot." Such was ilie palmetto fort, the only bulwark between brave men iiikI 'heir ijriivi'i ; tbe on!v hanivi llint opposed the entrance of the ii.iader to tin; only in ii it in)** city in t!ic S .nth. And how >vell llie palmetto logs ?i->i>il the shock and concentrated lire of three hundred cannon, let onr historian ti ll lis. ' Such a Midden burst of li.une and 11)under; could not hut make us Seel very ijueer at lirsl, especial;\ as we were young I nMinis, and had never l>e? n engaged ill such an a<vful scene before. 13ul a fo>v rounds presently brought u.? all rtghf j Again, and tl.cn, with he-ids hound up, and stripped to the but!, we plied our bull d?>^H like lie roes. "The llrnish outnumbered its iti men and at leant three t<> one, but llieu Ct y our guns, noine of tliem at least, were much (bo heaviest, tan sine balls ot two i and torty pounds weight; and when the monsters, crammed to the throat with chained shot and inlet rot' lite, let out, it was with such hideous peali as inadc both earth and oee tit tieuibie. At otic lime it appeared as though, by a strange kmJ of accident, all their broad sides had struck up at ollce, which made the fort tremble again. Hut our pabnettoes stood the lire to a miracle, closed up without sign of splinter, on their shot, which was stopped by the intermediate sand while. Oil the other hand, evorv bullet thai w? fired went tl?r<li and through their ships, timber hea Is, Mnd iron an ehors, in their furious course. And lima w?n tlie order <>f our battle?there, a line of seven tail ships ; and hern, one little, Solitary tort?there, Hritn-h Discipline;? and here, American enthusiasms?there, bravo men lighting (or a tyrant ,* and here lot roe* contending tor iihtuty !" Such was the tight, and the result waa a victory tl?a most glorious in the history of tho lb-volution, (taihiring a remnant of bis shattered and dismantled ships, Sir 1'eter l'arker, sullen and cieslfallou, retreated from Charleston, a whipped man?whipped by raw militia, behind a rude, hastily built fort of palmetto log* ; and thus, while >ho ConUm-uinl Congress ... 1>u;i i -i- I : . i-t ' - T*?7?n t%% a miuevwipigf mm iiem* tMiing hIhiui h fiedtuMiion of ind?-|>.-n i deuce, on illo 2bd? day of June, 1770, and .six days before the declaration of national independence, South Carolina had already declared her ind< pendente and annotineed the fact to ihu world in the diapason music of her Cerberian thunders. Such is the history of the palmetto, and how it heeaine a consecrated tree ?a proud historical memory. Aid when Carolina sent her regiment to Mexico, she sent them under the palmetto tlai*, which streaming above them in battle, would inspire them .\ith the memory of 1VTG. ami remind them that its lustre most not be dimmed by them. When our \ono table Coventor reviewed its and parted witit us, h.e pointed to our lla^, and said: "J n i\v s> e in tlm it V HI? j ; 11 m:i to banner lloatin<; ti iunvphantlv over the storm of war. (o>, ami the (Iml i t hat ties {fit with YOU." Ami it was 1*i 1111:1 o I. At Vera ( in/. C'ontreras, Clieruhiisoo, Cliepultepee ami Helen the J'almettu haulier del wave, "lake a pale, nisastsous plant, O'er the purple tide of war."' Ami though mighty hosts assailed it, ami its braves'. men fell thick tinvler its h>i?!#, it was h-irne < n evety lie'.d, tlie orill.iinme of victory. 1 have heeii thus nrniilo t<> e'i\e tlie history of the palmetto, ami how it came that the Carolina lieyiliieiit was called "the 1 alme'.to liej>iinciit," ami win ties history is headed "the l'almetlucs in ; Mexico." 1I0W SUT LOVENGOOD EXPLODED llts l.xridtticxci; wi n so;>.\ ruauKits, Sut related tlie storv thus! ''(.leorjje, did \"U ever see S.cilv Humes ! Her d id iites at the K il 1 Mi id. 5>pi m^s, ni di ] to the (?re^orv line." e*, a very hanl-mme ;;iri." j "1laiidsmne ! that wold don't kivt r the case; it sounds like caliwi' whiskey wal? r, when \e area! l?ig t>pi and the : slilliioii-e i>'ii mil' ? oil', all lilt a lainili I mi y er llask ??141 \ hall' lull. f"d:e shows among w mien lik' a stud'. ?\ver as < oiujta . re<l to dog loniuil an sm ut weed ail j ill j sin. Mat thnr ain't no use tryin* t ? <! ; ?eril>e her. <h ii.-ln't rratvl ilnu a w 11 vJtt'V b.mvi with hotli heads stove out, il hit war licit sturdy to. her, an I good toot ! hull at that. She ways just two linn.I led and twenty s.\ noun i>, an >t ?ti Is six j teen hands high. She never got in an i-nnil clu..a in her lii'e, an you kin lin'k lilt' 4 top tiv a cliuiii iir a big dog eoMar round Iter waist. I've seen her jump over the top uv a spin Lntti'iil elieer, in never show 11ci ankle or keeh her dress onto it. Sim kernel devil eiuif iihoul her to lid a t ..... I III . " ': ;iii tie i, '.\ '.n !? sK'll ?s WSiltO a- ihtt ii.?i?|c iiv it tr< .,'?tool, clifeks :i 1 > i'j > ;t- u*il as a pe-irohe's gul.snt t! >_;\\ooJ hlosr-uni time; an mcIi a smile ! < I, 1 bo dratted ?'| it's ali\ u-o litlkiii'. 1 hat gal ?. ?111 make n o murder <i liUlmp Soul i hisst !t* or kill main, not t<? speak uv dad, , ?-l' she ji-st hinted that .-.he wanted such a tiiiiiL* dun. "Well, to I>'!1 it a!1 at oust, -ho war a | gal all over, train tlm p ntuv her I nails \ lit the longest liar on the liiest knob uv | her head?gal nil t|K. mile, e\ > -r\ w here j ?an thai uv the cxeitinist km I. Ov eorse I l.-atied up to her a> eio.-e a- 1 date tu, an in spite m long Ifgs, appetite lor , w hie key, shin I s- rape, an d id's nelui' lio-s, Isht sortei leaned lip to ine, an I was boginnin' to think I war the greatest and i'ointdrt..l>!ial man on \ earth, not t xeeptin' ( ) R....L- ... is -i ..... X' " ?..v? >>. IMI-II mi i niiii'j, v .iii ail hi* i.ulil culler-d, w rinkiod win.en, cradles , lilll of hahlcs, ;t1111 pm Si t Like thrown ill. Wei', <>ne day a cussed dcceiviu, palavcrtn', slii.kiu1 ^ ai.kce pedlar, : ! jack knile an jaw, cum to o.d man liurues. with a lo.ol iiv apple pat us, cal ckcr, rih Lin.-, jewohai ps and ?-o il-y po w d e i s. Now, mind, I d never hecrti toll nv that truck afore, an I h>- darned el' I don't want j it to he the la>l?was nor r ile powder? wus nor porta--ion? three limes us .-mart ?an hints was, heap was. Darn him. 1 Dan: all Yankee pedlars, and darn their principles and practise*, 1 say. 1 wish I had ail the sod\ powder iliev ever made in h:s cn?ed paunch, an a shiw match ii.xed til liiui, ati I had a chunk iiv hie, the feller who touiid a pieco nv him I ;ir .... - 1 enough to Wil it cockroach, ought to ho king of the Sultan's harem a tliomaml y. ars for Ins luck. Thev ain't human no how. Tim mint at K:la<lclfy is tlmr heaven; thoy think lliar?('o<l cats hat dimes for breakfast, hashes the levies fur dinner, an swallcrs a cent on a <hic<i appil fur su|>]? r, sets on a slampiii' iihcIiiiio ftir a a throne, sleeps una t ill- lull uv hat d>.l lars, an measures men like money, by count. They halnt oneov 'em got a soul ' tn>.- ? !.? ? - - . ?..v !> vtiuiu u.-iiu r it HI ?i seed, Mii-l leave room tor mu tiddler. "Well, Sicily bought a tin box of the nody from hin>, an hid it away from her tollo, a Mtvin' it for inc. 1 li:*|?|>en<>?.l to pass next day; uv norm; 1 nloppcd to enjoy a look nl the templicr* and alio w ar , mighty lutin' to me, put one arm round 1 nil neck, and tulher one whar llie firs ingle go? s round a hoas, luk the inturn on me (With Iter left fut, and gin me a kisa.? Says ahe : "Sutty, lovo, I've got ftumtliin' for you. h ih'w ten-tat inn"?an I believed it, fur I I begun lo feci it already. My toerf felt like little roiiiniea wur nibblin' at 'em? n cold strvak run up nn down my bark like a lizard with a turkey lien art or liiin in setlin' tune; my heart foil hot and onsatisfied like, an then I'd a rut old Soul's throat, ef the bad a hinted at a needaea* tily fua bich a npurashun. Then ?he pored ten or twelve blue papers of the sody inter a big tumbler, and about the Hume number ov white ones inter tuiher turnbu r, and put ni onto a pint ov water on ; both ov 'eiu, an stirred 'em both Up with < a case knife, luokin' as solemn as a ole jackass in a snow storm when the fodder is all gin out. She helt wuu while she told nie to drink tuther. 1 swallered it jit one run?lasted salty like; I thot it, \ w ur part of the setisashun. 1Jut I wur , < mistaken; all ov the eussed scnsashun wur tu kum; an it warn't long at it, old boss, you'd better believe me. Then she | gin me Hither tumbler, an 1 sent it after , the last, race horse fashion. "In about wuu moment nnd a liaf 1 j tliot I'd swallered a tbradiin' mashine in full blast, or a cupple ov bull dogs, and tliey bad sot inter litin'. 1 seed thai I ( wurcotched agin?same family dispersi tioii to make eussed fools of themselves > every chance?so 1 broke 1'v.r my boss.? j 1 stole a look back, and thr.r Sicilv lav on Inr bach in ttie porch, scu-emiti' witli lalliii, Iter heels up in the air. a kickiu' ov them together like she were try in' to kick her slippers oil. J >lit I had no time to look then, an that wur a road of loine from the lions to the lioss, two feet wide ' an four inches deep?looked like it had been a snow in'?popped, and a hissiti', and a bilin' iike a tub ol hot soapsuds.? I lied getliered a cheiry tree Ittnb as I 1 run, an 1 lit astraddle o\ my boss, whip- ; 1 pin* an a kickiu' like mad. This, with j ' the sk try noises 1 made, (fur I wur wliis- i lin\ an a liissin', an a sputteiin' outer my 1 tuoiilli, nose an eyes, like a steam engine,) I s?>t him a reariii' an a cavoitin' like he ' wur out ov his senses. Well, lie went. 1 The loine rolled, an the ole black horse tluw. Ile jisl mizzled?scared ni tit deth, and so v in 1. 8 < we agieed on the pint ' i ov the greatest distance in the smallest < lime. i "I aimed fur I >r. (ioodinati's, at the Iliwa.--ee ('upper Mines, lu git sumihin 1 tu stop the explcshun in my inards. I 1 met a *<-route lider on his travels towards a fried chicken an a hat full ov ball bis kits. As I ciini a tarin along, lie hell tip \ his hands like he wanted to pray forme, ? but a> I preferred physic tu player, in inv pecooliar situnshun at that lime, 1 rolled i along. lie tuck a skeer as I cum ni cii tn him. bis f ,.tli gin out, an lie dodged boss, sandiebags, an overcoat inter a thi. kct jist like you've teed atertil vak to waVel o!eu a log w hen a tearin log s-eam boat cuu.s aiutig. As lie passed old man , I >urn? s. 8 oily hailed him. and axed ef , he'd met anvhoyy in a liurrv gwine up the road. The poor man thot perhaps he did atid perhaps he didn't, but Ik had seed a site, uv a .spook, ov a uhoat, tiv oie Uelzcbuh himself, ur the komit, he didn't adz icily know which, but takiu' j all things tugetlier an the short time he hill fur preparation, lie thot he nn?t a i lazy, long legged sliakin' ?ker a flee . Ill' if lie t to. ? r . I I. I ...... ... -- II. I. -. ~ ?v.. ut vuiu, it <1 iuat'K an while spotted hoss, a uliipnin' uv Inm , v.itli a l>i_r brush, ait lie lia<l a white , beard what onm from nii'li onto his eves ( in llie i>iitoiik>1 uv tin) .saijilh*, ami thfii . lurUi'il in went to iiis knese, an siiuitiines ( ilr:t|>j>ed to tin* ground iii bum-lies as bin : as a crow's nest; an heant a sound like j the nishiii' ov inity waters, ami lie war mightily exercised about it cunvliowv? Well. 1 guess lift war, an so wur his fat Iio^s, aii dc batrkv, tin wiist exercised i>t ail itv 'em war I, nnsolh Now, (ieorge, ?.l this bear ), an snots on the boss, ? ? j 1 -icani, an lire, an Miovv, at: wire tails, is | nwdacioiis humbug. It all cum outoii my innards, droiii-in' oil', uv mv nioutli without any voiniiitt' or eflort, and ? f it | hadn't, I d a busted inter more pieces than there is aigs in a l>:?r calti-h. 1 he ! Loyentjoods are all eoiitoiinded lools, an .lad ami ilie wtist ov 'em." i s OLD BUT GOOD. One of the comic papers revives an old ? story llial is belief now Uiali il was be [ lore llii so da\ s of spirit seeing and hear- t 111u. il seem* lliat im ??!<I sea captain, ' j who had n ine i from service and was 11v j i ing on a hum, had a wild, hariiiu searum , nephew living wiilr him. lie could nev- j . it dr.vo or (lighten said nephew to doing ] anything in the proper lime. Among j the rest, he could not get him to drive the | cows up to tniii; before d..rk?he had to , dine them up Iroin a hack pasture thro' ( lliO sugar btlsh. Fltiaih the captain ask.. , ud the lad it lie was not afraid to go ' through the woods alter dnik. , "l'raid! What is that? 1 never scon a fraid," replied llie bov. ' \\ ell, never mind, inv lad; you will see oiiu >oinc of these infills, 11 you do . not gut the cows up bcforo dark," said the cujitain, meaningly. 1 it a i uighl i lie boy played until dusk before he went after the cows, as usual. 1 The captain took a sheet and followed him. Now, the captain had a tame mon- j 1 ke\, who saw the performance, and mon : key like, took a taide cloth and followed I the captain at a respectful distance. The ? captain went into the middle <>f the i 1 woods, where there was a hig log by the side of the path. (ioing to the further ' <-nd of it, he wound ii s sheet around him, I got upon it, and stood stnl. I lie monkey I got on the liisl end without noise, and ' Ok] the same. So the parties stood when tho boy catne whistling along, with hi* < .lows. They shied a little upon seeing I the gliosis, which caused the boy to look ahead. "llello ! what is ihal V\ he shouted.? "l?y golly, I guess it's a fraid I11 itud then spying the monkey,ho sung ndt, "by Jo rosalein, if there ain't two Iraids?a big fraul, ai d a liftle fraul 1" This caused the captain to look round, when ho saw, for the lirst time, his ghost , i ly companion, lie tlmught it whs a fruiil ' sure enough. The old captain streaked < it lor home, the monkey chasing him, and I the wicked nephew chipping his hands < and shouting, "Kurt, big fraul, run, or lit- I lie fraul Ml ketch you J" 1? In ' # gg| ? iioriefi}. Wliv are husbands like dough? Bemuse the women knead them. "Have you 'Masted Hopes?'" asked a ady of a green librarian, whose face was ruuli swollen by the toothache. "No, ma'am ; but 1 have a blasted oolhache." I, ?..i.i ~r 11 -i? > ?11 ? .v .o iv/ki I'wuyiijs oerroiu, mat a ifili rate littvrah'ur, wishing to scrape an icip.iaiutanco with him, said, "Vou know, Mr. Jerrold, wo both row in the same oont." ' Yes," replied be, "but not with tbo >auie sculls." "John, how 1 wish i'. was as n-.ucli the fashion to trade wives as to trade boises." "Why so, Dick?" "I'd cheat somebody most shockingly before night." "Why is a woman's tonguo like a plalet ?" Because nolbiiig short of tbepovv r that created it can slop it in its reguar course. The man who perpetrated the above omn.drum lias le'.t for California, llewns niisued b\ fol ly women,and forty broomlicks were picked up in the harbor after he vessel left. "Neighbor Jones," said a rigid church 'number, "I have been informed that you fteii drive your team, or even go a lishliL' or a buntim? on tin- Sulilmili " "True," replied Jones, "but then, on heso occasion*, I always whistle psalm .lilies," 11 <>\v to okt a Hat.?"Say, I'omp, ,ou uiiiga, where you get dat new hat?" "At do shop, ob course.' "What am do price of sich an article is <!nt, niu^a "1 'iuriiio what's de price." "Uidn't you hx de man ?" "No?i/c sho/'ktrjM-r wisn't ilar /" A lazy fellow down South spells Teniessce alter this fashion?lOae. And .peils Andrew Jackson thus?&iu Jaxu. He will suit a primary school.?Kx. The above fellow is not tpiite as lazy as one we have beaul of in "Arkansaw," who.e name is Jav Hole. lie writes his n,,!,,.. i,.' ..... l i ... .1 .1 --i " ? u,??nu men puuviiiug i hole 11:i<>n<4li ilie paper after it. Sydney Smith was applied to, at one ime, in liis capacity as Canon of St. ,'aui's Cathedral, by a number of not vey intellectual vestrymen, as to how a ivoodeti pavement was to bo laid round lie edifice, and at once gave his opinion: Tool. ! pooh! gentlemen, you have only o lay your heads together, and the thing s done." A bevy of little children were telling heir father what they got at school.? lie eldest, reading,"spelling, and defini:uiis. "And what do you get, my little i . 1. - jv . i - mm . me* lamer to a little rosyheeked fellow, who was at that time sly y driving a ten-penny nail into the door ranch 4,Mc??uh, I gets readin', spellin* md span k in's.1' 1 <S> II ? TEMPERANCE SOCIETIES. W e often hear the assertion made that ocret societies, for the suppression of in einperaiiee, have pioved a failure. Such i fact, if it existed, would no doubt be {ratifying 10 those who have opposed the ause, either from interest or prejudice; ait it would he truly discouraging to hose who desire the well heing of their eliow men. We are happy to be ena>le l to state, from authentic information, bat such is not the case. The institu ion 01 uit.' :50ns ot temperance still exsts as vigorous as ever in many places n this State, as well as throughout the nion. Other Orders, having the same >hjccl in \ iew, still flourish ; whilst the mini Samaritans are extending their or^amz.-uion in other Stales, and exerting a alntaiv and increasing influence. The reports ot the recent session of the Grand Lodge show the Older to ho in a flourIshing condition even in Texas, says the Victoria Advocate of the 22d ult. Let the friends of the cause take courage.? Carolina Times. THE GREAT ELEVATOR. A Southern gentleman, at a Northern hotel, perceiving that the dining room -errant, a negro, w as bestowing his at cations elsewhere, to bis own negi'ect, ailed up John, and accosted him iu this .vise: ' John, I have servants at home, and un waited on as a gentleman should be. I am neglected here, and am tired of it. I give you lair notice that I will whip }ou iike a dug unless you behave heller." The consequence was lhat John be" came very attentive duiing the few days thai die gentleman remained. Ongoing away, John was called up and presented with a dollar or two, which he thus ac? knowledged : "lbank ?:< , tnatsa? Southern gentle men always so?lick us like blazes if we don't wait on 'em well, but when dey go dey idlers gib us a dollar or two. Now, dese abolition gem men mighty hard to sun, and want much wnitin on, an' when iiey go 'way, shake yer hand, look up to do wall, an' say, '(tod bless you, my unforlunalo friend, an' etewale you >u the scale ob liuinanity,' or aomothiii' like dat, dul dey never gib us a dollar or two 1? derate us wid," V * c: