The Lancaster ledger. (Lancaster, S.C.) 1852-1905, April 11, 1855, Image 1
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$2 per annum. in advance
NEUTRAL IN POLITICS?DEVOTED TO L ITER AIIV, COMMERCIAL, AGRICULTURAL, SCIENTIFIC, GENERAL AND LOCAL INTELLIGENCE. |
'VOLUME IV. LANCASTER. C. H? SOUTH CAROLINA, WEDNESDAY MORNING, APRIL II, 1855. NUM BER 9 4
iMM.UNfM j to bolievo that they will yet prove to be | still, however, standing steadily on his I tlemati. Vet nf two <;< *<? tl.? I?r?? - !
u uu.
Philosophy of Modern Spiritualism.
The actuality of rercalments from the
NvorlU of 8pirila wc inust assume to be
well established. Most incredulous minds
Ww Mdmit the possibility and the reality,
^'he fefrmant of unbelief requires but proper
investigation.
The wonderful relations and facts of
Spirit existence aro pressing their testimonies
and witness upon both the consciousness
and the senses of men ; and in nil
parts of the world, the manifestations are
greatly increased, so that die press is consierably
fraught with the written productions,
and libraries of observable si/.e are
fnrmnl from t ! <>?.?
itualism.
It forms, at once, an important epoch
in the grand history of Providential events.
The record i* given to the world. And
no observing and judicious mind can look
upon it, either with indifference or ridicule.
Even were tbero no new principles
of luor&lify and religion inculcated by
these communication*, the actual facts
themselves command the rational consideration
of the world. But they have a
design uncontrolahle by the mere powers
of reason. They enter the mind by an
iuternal way, first effecting the will-department,
ami then introduce themselves
to the logical judgements. They may
sometimes be above the capabilities of
reason, but when from just and good Spirits
they never produce an absurdity so an
to conflict with reason.
Losaons of instruction they will suroly
impress upon (lie human miud. The
Spirit, the phenomena, (he facta of the
maail?tation, are given ua. But the
phylosophy, jot more geuera'ly remains
to be understood, and to l>e written.
Explanations, indeed, liaro been attempted,
but they hare seemed to l?e incompetent
and unavailing to the generality
of mind. Some of thcin have become
a little popular, but only in proportion as
they are vague. Others have more
weight, and that in proportion as they
unite with their own best judgments and
logic, the inspired teachings of the Divine
Word, and the illumiii ited instruction* of
that commissioned seer and expositor, !>
manuel Swedenborg.
Were the generality of Spiritualist more
familiar with the almost thirty years of
Spiritual intercourse which Swedenborg
enjoyed, tbefte late manifestations would
appear far less marvellous, ami the nature
of thvni would be far better understood.
Still there is a wonderful newness about
tbein, and a true philosophy yet to be
givsn, which is of momentous interest.
It is now just alaxut a century since
Swedenborg was iu the glory of his iltuinitiation,
lie leaches us that all the
changes and new creation* in this natural
world do but correspond with like changes
and creations in the Spiritual woild.?
The causus are there '>?
? , "'O
hero.
In lrS7 (litre WAS, as lie iufurms us,
A special judgement passed u|m>ii the then
existing states, in tlie Spiritual world, niiJ
from (bat period a new dispensation or
order of things set in from that world, to
produce corrcsjKjnding results, in due time
is (bis world also.
Under the au*pices of a higher freedom
toflha human mind a new development
vf Uatural aoienoe, and oepecially of true
Religion, was to courao iu way to actual
manifestation in thie external world of
t>ur.e
lodging from the realities of appear*k?e,
hie etatemente and production* term
Evidently in fulfilment. With regard to
'Spiritualism, we do not maintain the reliability
of the communication*, and our illutnir.?d
author describee the danger* attending
them, and thoae who do not investigate
the writings of Sweden bo rg are
tooet likely to be misled bv them. W?
juaj look apon tliaae manife?tations u
Sot lira begniing of Spirit convene, and
4 leea troatry then it will be when it
ootnm from better Hpiriu,and from higher
i grew of development.
Swedenborg uy? in h? larger Diary,
"When Spirit* begin to convera with men,
{rat no confidence id what they any, for
for they any aluioet ally thing, nnd will
Waify* z .
Thhr mm to mint* only to Ibf bomOonvOWt,
and w? have evidence that
tliefO am already improvementa in the
character ef thorn* nnd thorn ia ground
.
vi uie mosi satisfactory and consoling nature.
Who can read the testimony given
iu the last volume of Judge Edmund's
without observing how multiplied arc the
instances where believers and new converts
are greatly comforted, attach n^
importance to the Iloly World, of which
these things are needed illustrations.
Swedenborg states, there is an intermediate
stato or world of Spirits between
heaven and hell, whither the Spirits of
the departed go as soon is they leave
these mortal bodies. In this intermediate
world they remain a certain period, greater
or less, according to fixedness of character,
until they eventually go to the
heavens above, or the bells below, in their
truly developed states.
Now, as be teaches, those iu this intermediate
condition, being in nearer affinity
with the prevailing states of inen on this
earth, moro naturally and properly com
tnunicate. And being to a great extent
undeveloped Spirits, tliey communicate
things, but partially good and true.?
Some are even disorderly. Hut the good
must predominate, and especially as the
influences of the higher angels descend,
and affect also better and improved mediums.
Some may think that theso communications
are hut what a class of philosophers
call a priori conceptions of the human
tiiiud, but the truth is, the Spirits
enter in and produce these conceptions
upon tho mind of the medium. In more
simple and common cases, the consciousness
of the medium is in its sleeping con
dition, where the voluntary powers of the
cerebrum have retired to their proper place
of repose, and the cerebellum receives the
Spirit impressions according to its states
and forms of activity, and so communi
cates them to those within the proper
sphere of the link medium.?Boston Herald.
DeWitt Clinton's Duel.
In Mr. Suhin's notes of dueling, we find
the following description of the duel between
Do Wit t Clinton and Swaitwout,
which took place near New York tit lb0'2.
Richard Rikcr was the second of
/?' - -- - - ? It* l-% - i -J t
j vnniuii, ami >? . r?. onmn (lie secoiul 01
SwarlWoUt. The parlies exchanged five
shots. Mr. Smith's statement it ;u follows
:
The ground being corn-oily meaursed,
and intermediate questions adjusted, tho
genllem.il took their stations?were each
presented with a pistol, and by older,
fared to the right and fired, ineffectually.
At the request of Mr. Hiker, I u>k?*d Mr.
Swartwout, "are you satisfied, sir ?" he answered,
"I am not."
The pistols then bein ? exchanged, and
their positions resumed, by order, the
gentlemen faced to the right, and tiled a
second shot without effect. At the request
of Mr. Hiker, I again addressed Mr.
Swartwout, "Are you satisfied, sir I' He
answered, 4 I am not?neither shall I he
until that apology is made, which I have
demanded. Until then, we must proceed."
I then presented a paper to Mr. Hiker,
containing the apology demanded, for
Mr. Clinton's signature, observing that we
could not spend our time in conversation;
that this paper must he signed or procee J.
Mr. Clinton declared he would not sign
?ny paper on me sunjeci?mat ne nan
no Animosity against Mr. Swarlwout,
would willingly shake hands and agree
to moot on tlie score of former friendship.
Mr. Swarlwout insisted on his signature
lo the apology?Mr. Clinton declining,
they stood at their post and fired a fourth
shot. Mr. Clinton's ball struck Mr. Swart*
wout's left leg about live inches below the
knee; he stood ready and collected. At
the request of Mr. Hiker, 1 again addressed
Mr. Swartwout, "Are you satisfied,
sir!" He answered that, "It wasusehss
to repeat the question?my determination
is fixed?and I heir we may nrodeed."
Mr. Clinton repeated that lie hail no
animosity against Mr. Hwartwout?was
very sorry for what had passed?proposed
to advnboe, shake hands and bury the
circumstance in oblivion. During this
conversation, Mr. 8wartwout's surgeon
kneeling by his side, extracted the ball
from the opposite side of his leg. Mr.
Swartwout standing erect on his post and
positively declining anything short of an
ample apology, they fired the fifth shot,
and Mr. Swartwout received a ball in bis
left teg abont five inches above the aokle;
' , } tV jir;
ka4BL. *
post, perfectly composed.
At the request of Itiker, I again
dressed Mr. Swartwout, "Are you s;
tied, sir!" Ho forcibly answered, "I
not, sir; proceed."
Mr. Clinton then quit his station
declined the combat, and declared
would fire no more. Mr. Swartwout
pressed himself surprised that Mr. Clir
would neither apologize nor give hiui
satisfaction required ; and addressing
said, "What shall I do, my friend?"
I answered, "Mr. Clinton declines I
king the apology required?refused tat
his position?and positively declares
will fight no more; and his second
peanng lo acquiesce in tiie dispositio
his principal, there is nothing left for
now, hut to have your wounds dressi
The surgeon attended, dressed Mr. Sw
wont's wounds, and the gentlemen
their respeclivo barges returned to
city.
The Winter of the Heart.
Let it never come upon you. Liv
that the good angels may protect
from this horrible evil?the winter of
heart
Let no freezing influence freeze up
fountains of sympathy and happines
its depths, no cold burden settle ovoi
withered hopes like snow on tho fa
flower; no rude blasts of discontent m
and shriek through its desolato chi
bcrs.
Your lift path may lead you amid
als which for a time seem utterly to
pede your progress, and shut out the li
of heaven from your unxious gaze.
Penury may take the place of ease
pleuty, your luxurious home may be
changed for a single, lowly room, the
couch for the straw pallet, the rich vis
for the coarse food of the {toor. Sum
friends may forsake you, and the :inp
ing world pass you hy with scarce
look or word of compassion.
You may he forced to toil wcai
steadily on to earn a livelihood, you t
encounter fraud and the nrarico wl
would extort to the last farthing, till
well nigh turn in disgust from your fel
beings.
Death may rover the dearcsttiea I
bind you to earth, and leave you in f
fi.l datknojs. That noble, manly boy,
role hope of your declining years, 111.11
taken from you, while your spirit cli
to liiin Willi U iiril.l
?iv.. ? i' u*i wnnv itjr niiiiii C
the shadow of the totub cannot wh
subdue.
Hut amid all these sorrows, do
come to the conclusion that nobody
ever so afflicted as you are, and aban
every sweet anticipation of "better di
in the unknown future. Do not Jose j
faith in human excellence, because \
contidencc lias sometimes been lietra;
nor believe that friendship is only a d
sion, and love a bright phantom wl
j melts away from your grasp.
Do not think you are disappoints
your expectations, and haffled in j
pursuits. Do not declare that God
forsaken you, when your way is lied
about with thorns, or repinesiufully w
lie calls your dear ones to the laud
yond the grave.
Keep a holy trust in heaven, thro
every trial hear adversity with fortiti
and look upward in hours of tempta
and suffering*. When your locks
while, your eyes dim, nnd limb* we
, when your steps falier on tlie verg
death's gbomy vale, still retnin the fr
lies* nnd the buoynncy of spirit wl
will shield you from the winter of
heart.
The Victims of Consumption.
It is nmongnt women that consuinp
finds most of iU victims in America
might be expected from their almost
versal indifference to the preservatio
health. The neglect to dress with*
cient warmth, or suitable to the sen
is the general error of the sex. If
new winter-clonk is not bought, when
cold spell suddenly comes on, the
inantillais still worn, because tbe
year's clonk is out of fashion. Thei
one fatal habit of tha sex, which haa I
commented on, but, alas! in rain;
mean the wearing of thin show,
thickest gaiter worn by a woman, on
dampest day, ia proverbially lighter in
vppeva, than the Mmmar boot of a |
4k *"v*:
^ not the hardiest by nature. Even when w
ad- J women wear giun overshoes, on slushy or tl
itis- ] rainy days, there is nothing to protect the y
am ancle from the wet skirls. A man who ; n
should keep his feet and ankles damp ti
and continually, as ladies do theirs, in fall, wiu- w
he j ter and spring, would very soon be in his J h
ex- I grave I h
iton There arc still other causes for consump- y
the | lion. Sonic of these are such as are lit- n
ine, : tlo suspected. Hundreds of women die tl
annually, for cxamble, for the want of V
ma- fiesh air. American females live prover- t<
,ing bially too sedentary a life. Their time is w
i ho spent in close rooms, and often they do o
ap- not take exercise enough; it is certain h
n of that, as a mass, they neglect inspiring o
you exercise in the freeh out-of-door air. Ma- n
ed." uy a wife and mother who is fully awake c
art- t) the folly of fashionable pleasure, sacri- w
, in fices herself to the pseudo proprieties of ii
the custom which ordains woiucn "to be keepers
at home," in a sense ruinous to health b
rigor and beauty. A woman's a pear- s
ance, who ban been raised in a dark par- u
lor, is always suggestive of cellar vegeta- g
6 6o tion?lifeless and colorless. b
you ? k
the Beautiful Extract. ?
wir ?
the When the summer of youth is slowly ^
g in wasting away into the nightfall of ago, t|
r its and the shadows of the past years grow s<
ded deeper, and life, wears to its close, it is
own pleasant to look back through the vista
rtni. of time upon the sorrows and felicities of
our earliest years. If wo have a home to ^
tri- shelter, aud hearts to rejoice with us, and *
im- friends have been gathered together a- a
g|,l round our firerides, then tho rough place 'l
of our wayfaring wW have been worn and "
Hnd smoothed away is the twilight of life, l'
ex_ while the manv spots we hare passed a
soft through, "will brigUter-and more
nj8 beautiful. Happy, indeed, are they 8
mcr whose intercouise with the world has not
itv- changed the tone of their holier feelings, "
|y a or broken those musical chords of the "
heart, whose vibrations are so melodic us, *
rily, so tender an.l touching in the evening of 14
nay v
= _ AGRICULTURAL, i
that [From the Southern Cultivator.]
X WORK FOR THE MONTH, v
' be . . ?
ngs [April, (Latin April is) is so culled from '
ven "/*no? "l? open," in allusion to the open- *
ollv ln8 l'ie 5'ouu6 ^"ids of trees or flowers. 1
and the general development of vegetation 1
at this season. This is the only month >
not , . ,
wliose present name fee lis to have refer- *
was , . , . , .
j ence to tlio season hi which it occurs. It '
? corresj>onds to the Jewish Zif or Ziv, (I 1
' Kings'vi, 1.) the eiyhlh of their civil and *
second of their sacred year. Its Saxon s
our ,, ' ?
I name was Eoster, or Osior-tnonath; "Ost |
^' signifying East, and the winds, by ancient f
. observation, being found in this month 1
most commonly to blow from the East. 1
1 THE PLANTATION. t
our . 1
Provisions of all kinds still continue J
j scarce and dear, and as it is likely that 4
lien ' Vttsl'luanlitioa of grain will be needed for 4
^ exportation, we repeat, urgently, our ad- 41
vice of last month to plant heavily of
, Corn, Sweet Potatoes, Cow Peas, [See 1
ugh ' ... , , |
udc *r',c'wun curing vines, in present number,] 1
. ' Ac. It is probable that most of our read- I
ers have already planted Corn, but if pi ant- '
ing has been delayed by any untoward b
circumstances, loose not a moment uow, f
e#j 4,4 ge^4,,2 a 'arge crop into the ground. 1
J, Plow deep, and manure heavily; plant 1
the earliest and heaviest seed you can ob- 1
tain, and as soon as the young plants have '
made sufficient growth, thin out to the 1
proper "stand" and give the ground a thor- j
ougli working. A great deal depends uption
on '',c ?ftcr-cultureof Corn, (supposing it
lt to have been properly planted nt first,) ?
uni- an('? *n l'"* connection, we would call at- j
n 0f ten tion to the suggestions of our practical ?
uffi and intelligent correspondent, "M," on a
uton P^g0 108- t
the Having fully finished the planting of i
the your Corn crop, take hold and complete t
fall without delay, the planting of Cottou.? *
last We would urge upon our readers the ne- I
-e is cesaity of deeper aud cleaner culture thau \
eon they generally give this all important ata- t
we pie. Unfortunately every man tliiuks j
The bia own system of "making cotton" the ?
the beat known, and is seldom willing to pro- t
the fit by the example of even his more sue- (
jon- oeaaful neighbor. The problem of making f
r *
cm ?n?ji jc?f, a paying crop ol cotton, !
itliout greatly impoverishing the land
!iat produces it, is one that very few have
et solved. That it can be done, we have
ot the least doubt; but until the generaon
of anti progressionists passes away,
re have no hope of seeing it. Ultimatcj
it must come, or Cotton culture will
ave to be abandoned; for with the vast
early increase of our population, it will
ot take long to exhaust and wear out all
lie available new lauds in the Union.?
Ve would say, then: Do not try to "cover
so.much surface" with this crop, but do
rcll whatever you attempt. Better 4U
r 50 acres well cultivated, than 2 or 3
undred merely scratched over, l'lant
nly the "improved" varieties, and relember
that one bale of fine, long staple,
arefully handled, and properly ginned,
rill bring as much money as twp bales of
iditferent, specked and foul "dog-tail."
Continue to set out Sweet potatoes?
otli "setts" and "draws." Ridges for
weet potatoes should not be thrown up
ntil you are ready to plant. Plow the
round deep and well, and harrow finely,
cfore ridging up. Plant melons, pumpins,
squashes, die. Sow Millet, Doura,
nd common Corn for fodder, in drills,
nee every fortnight or three weeks, until
ite in the Summer. You cannot make
le ground too rich for these forage crops,
? do not be afraid to put on the manure.
TUE VEGETABLE GARDEN.
Whatever you have been prevented
oil) doing last month by unfavorable
eather, or other causes, must now be
Uended to, promptly, or it will bo too
ite. The young weeds, "nut grass," Ac.,
'ill now begin to dispute j?ossession of
ic ground with your early vegetables,
nd unless you attack them vigorously,
nd keep them uuder, they will be sure to
et the start of your crop.
Set out early cabbages, peppers, Tolatoes,
egg plants, Ac. Transplant letuce.
Force your young vegetables into
igorous and rapid growth, by repeated
pplieations of liquid manures; to prepare
iliich, use 4 quarts of well rotted stable
lanurc, 4 quarts of hen-house manure,
gallons of chamber-ley, and 2 quarts of
inely pulverised guano, to one barrel of
ain water, keeping the barrel covered,
,nd the liquid well-stirred up. Saturate ;
he earth around your plants occasionally j
villi this compound from the rose of a ]
catering pot, early in the morning, or J
ate in the afternoon, not allowing the li|uid
to fall on the plants. Plant waternelons
musk-melons, cucumbers, squash's,
<fec. Plant pole beans, such as the Lina,
or butter beau, Ac., four feet apart
:ach way. Also, bush or dwarf beans,
nay be planted now, dropping them from
wo to four inches apart in the drill. Sow
i full crop of okra in a rich, well-drained
pot, in beds or ridges 4 feet apart; drop
>ing four or live seeds in each hill, and 3
feet apart on the ridges. Wheu well up,
hin out to a single plant, leaving the most
hrifty. Keep the earth around them
well worked, and haul a little soil around
he stems of the plant from time to time.
The "dwarf" or Prolific Okra is the finest
ruriety we know. It needs no "topping,"
ind often produces over 100 pods on one
talk. Sow red cabbage, for pickling.?
?ow Cauliflowers and Procoli early this
nonth, for a full crop. Sow, also, in warm
>orders, in the open ground, tomatoes,
>eppcrs, Ac. Sow radishes, in a deep,
ight soil, every three weeks, for a succesion.
Sow citrons, melons and the small
;lass melons, for preserves. Cultivate
liese as you would the water or musk
nelon. Plaut Gherkins in the middle of
his month, and cultivate like cucumbers,
'lanl an abundance of t'.:e different culiinry
herbs, such as parsley, savory, mar*
orum, fennel, Ac.
TDK ORCQliRD.
Kxainiftf your peach trees closely,and if
iny borers yet remain under the bark,
ust below the surface, remove tiie earth
md dig them ou: carefully with a thin,
harp pointed knife, or a piece of iron wire;
hen apply to the excoriated bark (with
i white-wash or large paint brush)a mixuro
composed of 10 parts of lime; 5 of
ishee; 2 of salt, and 2 of coal or gas tar.
^et all these ingredients (except the tar)
>e mixed with water until the wash is of
he thickness of cream?then stir in the
pu tar, and apply the mixture with a lib*
iral hand, from the main roots t& the
leigbt of 10 or 12 inches above the surace.
When the wash dries and hardens,
111 the cavity or baeie aroucd the tree
Willi fresh earth and heap it up around |
the trunk 8 or 10 inches above the -air- *
face. Work or looson tlie earth around IK
your fruit trees?apply a good coat of 51
well rotted manure?destroy all suckers, ^
cut out dead wood, Ac. Catterpillnr "=*
nests will now begin to be distinctly vi>i- |
ble; and now is tlie time to destroy my- I _1
rinds of them. Taken long, light pole? I
drive into one end of it crosswise, (a quartcr
of an inch apart, and on all sides (8 g(
or 10 large nails. Let a boy pass along
the rows of fruit trees, pole in hand, and
whenever bo espies a nest, a thrust of the
pole and a downward twist will bring tlio
nest and its inmates to his feet, when they g.
can be easily crushed, and prevented from
spreading. Budded trees of last year,
should now be headed down to the bud, g
and all shoots below the latter removed, wj
so that it may have the full strength of j
the stock. Cuttings of the Quince, Fig,
l'omegranate, Ac., should be treated in ft
similar manner, via: all buds but the
strongest, or leading one rubbed oft' with
the figures?the ground kept loose and
mellow, and mulched straw or leaves, du- ?
* re
ring the summer months.
THE FLOWER GARDEN AND
SHRUBBERY. k<
Sow seeds of hardy Annuals in borders, to
and thin out to proper distances, when gi
sufficiently grown. Dahlias that have hi
been Parted in pots, may now bo set out
in tho open ground; and tender annuals ex
may now be pricked out from the but bed,
the latter part of ibis month. Evergreens
of all kinds, may now be transplanted;
in doing which, lift a good ball of earth do
with tho roots, apply water copiously
when planting, and keep the ground around
their stems well mulched with pine b<
straw or other leaves. Water frequently
afterwards.
THE CULTURE OF CORN. w
Messrs. Editors : I propose, wi'.li your ot
permission, submitting to your readers a
method of cultivating corn, the chief merit
of which (if there be any) is a saving of w
unnecessary work. 'e
Premising that before this reaches the w
eye of the planters, their corn will he in 1,1
the ground, perhaps already up, I now
give the modus operandi, viz: tl
1st. To put the bar of a good turning
plough as near as possible to the plant
and keeping deep, throw the earth from
it till you go over the crop. This leaves
a bed 8 to 10 inches wide, into which S1
the sun will penetrate and waun the roots;
if there be rain it will be readilv absorbed
t
where most needed. .
li
2d. Having run but one furrow, at the
i end of 10 or 15 days put a coulter or bulltongue
plow in the bottom of it, keeping ^
the horse in the furrow, pass over tho entire
field. This process will have loosened ^
' the earth at least one foot deep, si ighlly |
' moulded the corn, and left tho ground
[ mellow, as far as the roots need for a fort
night more, when it will bo a fool high, ^
and ready for the ,
3rd "running round," with the mould
board to the corn, which will iuverl the
mellow soil, and mould it mil, going this
time two furrows; about ten days later
1 plant your peas, and break the middle ^
' out thoroughly, which, in a fair season,
will give as good a crop as the land will ^
! bear.
i Of course, it is impossible to give di- ,
rections for all and every kind of soils,
I aud seasons?every planter will reject
' any usage different from bis own best
judgement.
1 have found the foregoing to answer '
well, on a flat surface, clay loam, and if ?
the suggestions benefit a brother farmer, lJ
my object will have been accomplished.
Respectfully, M. n
Kichmoud Co., lla., March. 1855.
' ii
A rogue asked charity on pretence of
boing dumb. A lady having asked him,
Willi equal simplicity and humanity, bow u
long he had been dumb, he was throwu t
off hia guard, and answered, "From birth
madam. ?
"Poor fellow," said the lady, an J gave
him a dollar.
Piddt'i blvkdu,?"O, yi*! O, yis!" a
cried an irishman in the street a few daya
since, ringing a bell, "Loat, between twilve ?<
o'clock and McKinney'a store, on Market* i"
street, a large braaa key. I'll not be nfther
tellin ye whet it Wfta, blit it was tl
thekay to the bank, share." t
' * ' v ;*'* ^
Kki'autke.?We remember that sotno
ars ago, Roger M. Sherman and Perry
uiih were opposed to each other aa adicates
in an important ease before a
urt of justice in Connecticut. Smith
icne.l the case with a violent tirade alinst
Sherman's political character.?
lcrinan rose and vcrv composedly rear
ked:
"I shall not discuss politics with Mr.
nith before the court, but I am perfectly
illing to argue .piestions of law, to chop
gic or even split hairs with hiui."
"Split that, then," said Smith, at the
rno time pulling a short, rough looking
ilr from his own head, and handing it
...? 1- \M ~ Dt
vi ii'imiut Air. ouortnan. .
"May it please the honorable court,"
torted Sherman, "1 didn't say bristles."
An irregular apprentice frequently
ieping late hours, his master at length
ok occasion to apply some weighty arunents,
to convince him of the error of
s way.
During the chastisement, the master
claimed?
How long will you serve the devil!"
The boy replied whimpering?
"You kuow best, sir; I believe my inntuies
will be out in three mouths."
A gentleman inquired of a carpenter's
>y?
"My lad, when will this job your masr
has now ou hand be completed!"
1 can't tell air," said the honest bqy,
llcssly?"it's a 'day job,' and it will diimd
upon how soon the old man hasanher
order."
?
There is a maiden lady in Connecticut
ho is so extremely nice in her notions of
male modesty, that she turned off her
asherwoinan because she put her clothes
i the same tub with those of a young
lan. "Woe to the man that marries
latgall!"
An Irishman was asked why he wore
is stockings wrong side out?
"Because there's a hoie on the other
de of em," was the reply.
Like Father Like Son. ? "What's
ball" sai 1 a schoolmaster, pointing to the
itter X.
"Daddy's name."
"No it isn't your daddy's name, you
lock head! It's X.
"I'll bo shot if it is! It's daddy's name,
i!o?ed if it ain't I'vo seen him write it ofcn."
A gentleman was once walking in a
treet, when he met a stons cutter, whom
o thus addressed:
"My good fellow, if iho devil was to
oine now, which of us would he take?"
After a little hesitation, the man relied?
"Me, sir." 4
Annoyed by this reply.theouorist a*kod
ft * ' 1
ira for a reason:
"Because, yer honor, he'd be glad to
etch mesclf sure; and he'd have you at
ny titr.e."
A servant maid, who was occupied in
ickling her mistress's cabbage, took the *
pportunity of cabbagging her misatreaa'a
icklea, saying it made no difference.
Cine for the palpitation of the heart?
rarriage. Other cures have been recommended,
but I)r. Francis nays this is the
nly cure that can l>e relied on.
?- ^ m mii \
"Have you mud) fish in you bag?*
sked a person of a fishcruia > who wmr9- .i
timing home.
?.V<v_ - " >1- -i: " ?
a n VTif *? ?? WO WI|lpWy HI* ^ (
Jono?, eteppiog up to a gentleman who
k aa engaged in conversation with alx>ut
(luzett others, said*. ' ,i
"It leenw to me I have wen your phya>gnoffly
eotnervlicre before, but I cannot
magine where."
"Very likely," be replied; MI hate been
be keeper of a prison for npwarde ef
unity y ana"
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