I ?O?ISIE THE M?NiCURISl I-? Z By C. L. CULLEN. ?immm... j. (Copyright.) j Mousie Mildred broke into a mer ?little muffled laugh. ? She had bei : i?W/iifMf?^^ silently intent t ' llftfitlvI) El^ on my nai*s * REl^^^iv quite some time J^HHSHBSL The sudden oi burst of subdue ?wBB^8SSy yet bubbling mir .' /l^^ ^H?^ surprised me. "?^Pik^^a as'ce,i: abo [i^Br^^? "Oh, nuthin ? ,8 ets with myself that yqu was pne:p' 9, -them-' oh^you-babesky-doll. kind, that'd "~~>?i?rdly pass your mitts over. to'",oe made human lookin''before) ybii'd be ;gin to slip me that 'Do you like the theater/ Aspasia?' line o' C?sfHiafr con, and then get busy guessin' whether I liked the way they dish up spaghet' at Dufanti's, or would I prefer to tool out to Foodmanston Inn in a chug .chaise, and. poke -provender, into my map al freshco, with the birdies twit terin' tweet-tweetie in the trees, and all nature smilin' like a front-row gell on the end of the line slantin' a Pitts burgh steel magnet in box A. "That's the way I have you tucked .away in the back of my bean when you squat in front, of my bench, and that's the bet I made. Y' ain't mad .over my tellin' yuh, are 3fuh? You ast me, and I had to unreel it." Again I reassured her, and she pro ceded: "Yuh can't always tell about a zob -I mean a gent-that's there with that town-tease, hamlet-hoiden, oh such-larks look about him when he first breezes into a mitt-maison and ?does the hurry pipe aroun' the tables to sort over the lookers. . "You ain't the first gamble I lose with myself try in' to pick 'em right on the blow-in, nor the twentieth, when it comes to that. "I'm just as often Little Lucy the Lof ir when I try to pull that read-'em .qu^ :k numbab as any o' the rest o' the civ:w-polishin' dolls scattered aroun' th ?e works. "We all get in German just as often as we dope 'em right. As I was sayin', > VI handicapped you for one o' them stout-just stout enough-cut-ups vthat'd be purlin' the old numbah nine bunk hito my pinkie-winkie listeners long before you lifted your paws out of the soakm' pan. Says I to myself, 'This keg-I mean gent-will be dang lin' one o'them cochineal-red-ink feeds at the Cafe de Noah's Ark at me before 1 have time to find out whether he bites bis nails. "I'm Jerry to it now that you wouldn't kite a claw-trimmin' doll to a wop or any other kind of a tahb'-dote for the hull lower half o' the island on account o' bein' 'fraid o' what might come off later when, the family was hepped to it." Unwelcome Invitation. Donald, aged four, had been kept at "hoirie for some time for fear of catch ing the whooping cough, so one after noon, after much pleading with his mamma, he was .permitted to take a ? little outing. While sitting on a bench In the park a child sat down beside him, who at once began to cough violently. Donald's mother snatched him away quickly and immediately started for home. Donald was quite silent on the homeward journey, but just as soon aaske stepped inside of the door of his hefne he exclaimed excitedly to his sisters: "O, kids! What do you think? I got invited to the whooping cough V- :;today." Ancient Gateways. In days when cities were walled about for purposes of defense against an enemy, most of the masters of the people being marauders and brigands, there were real gates, by which" is. meant tremendous doors of solid oak built within stone walls which were indestructible by any w?apons of those times. The ancient gates were built in the walls of cities at those points where the chief highways centered and on which an enemy would surely try to make his: attack. Appeal for Help. Ruth, who is two, was visiting her' grandmother, who' had some summer boarders' with ' whom there was a lit tle : boy! whom Ruth 'disliked very much, but who was fond of her. 'One1 day when Ruth'was seated on a porch bench the little.boy. came up and sat. down close .beside her. : She: tried every method to remove him and fi^al-. ly called in desperation to her grand-; mother: "O, grandma, please do come and help me; I'se too much squeezed." . Not What He Meant.. In, a case in which , a "man : was, charged' w,lth cruelly: ill-treating-jai horse by: working; it '.in ' an unfit'., state," a constable expressed the opinion, that the animal was hot' capable of doing , any more'- work-on account of its ?ge. ' A solicitor for the defense suggested that the horse : merely required a ; rest. Magistrate-"lEternaLv rest?" Solicitor-"1 do not mean that, isir.^ '. ''r ???'?? What Made Her* Laugh. , ' ;, : Jean was warned by her p?r?hts not to mention the fact that their guest at . dinner had an unusually large nose. In the course of the evening me?hJe?n became convulsed with laughter- She was asked with fear and\ trembling what was the cause of her:mirth. Her reply was: 'O, I'm not laughing at your nose, Mr. Smith-I'm laughing at the plates on mother's plate rail." Flag of Belgium. The Belgian flag perpetuates the colors of the duchy of Brabant, and was adopted when the monarchy was set up in 1831. The red, it should be noted by those who wish to use it cor rectly, forms the fly of the flag, the yellow/the middle, and the black the hoist. The Russian Imperial navy flies the ancient blue saltire of St. Andrew on a white ground. .! \ ~~~ Where Cloves Come From. The b?st doyes come from Amboyna, one of the, Mqlucca islands. ., They . are grown.also'in Java, Sj?matra,; Zanzibar, and in ' the West' Indies. ? Th? clove tree .grows as high as^O f?set The ripe fruit resembles a small 'olive. ' The ?vciov*':?of commerce Is :th? 'bl?'Bsom* which! ITs dried by exposure to Wood smok?'and th?sun. ;' French Loquacity. There is no nation like the French., A French milliner will make a hat out of a piece of felt and nothing; and a French official will make a diplomatic episode out of nothing at all, putting into five minutes of futility all the Gallic civilization of centuries,-Ar nold Bennett in the Century Magazine. Kindly Thoughtfulness. "How did you ever get the nerve to play the cornet? Doesn't your prac ticing drive your wife almost to dis traction?" "No," replied Mr. Meek ton. "She encourages me. She thinks that anything that'll change my ordi nary facial expression is worth some sacrifice."-Washington Star. As lt Appeared to Her. Mary, aged five, had been attending camp meeting, for several days with her parents, and upon her return her little brother asked what it was like. "Oh," she replied, "it's a.place where they have Sunday every day in the week." Rich Soil of Russia. The soil of Russia is rich in ores pt all kinds, and the mining industry is steadily increasing. At the present time there are rather more than half a million people engaged in the mak ing and working of metals. Removing Tar Stains. To remove tar stains rub the spot first with lard and then with soap. Leave for au hour and then wash in hot water softened with ammonia. If traces still remain, rub with tur pentine. Good Sanitary Job. Six-year-old Sherwood was boasting' that he was working in a blacksmith shop. "What do you do there? Shoe horses?" he was asked. "No!" he an swered promptly, "I shoo flies." New Material for Lead Pencils. Juniper from the Indian reserva tions of New Mexico and Arizona may prove an excellent source of material for lead pencils. Life's Stern Command. This stern command must come to all-a hard unyielding fact-"Stand up and take your medicine-don't play the baby act." Man's Best Lessons. The best lessons a man can learn Are from bis own mistakes. Extra Hi u ?i. happen td' Jr i ! o.t.? ? 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S I wish to inform the g< pf Edgefieid that I will co Blacksmith Shop that v lished by my father, Gilt about 40 years ago and by him until his death' rei tjer^pnrtp. all:iwori?..?ntrnsi and will guarantee every ?j Memoirs Napoleo In Three Volumes ,, ^" This man caused the last general European war. His personal memoirs, written by his secre.ary, Baron De Menevaly are ' full of th? most absorbing incidents, especially in . view of the present great Euro pean struggle. Just a hundred years ago, his ambi tions bathed the Continent in a sea of blood. France alone, under his leader-., ship, fought Germany, Russia, Austria, . Italy, and Great Britain-and won. Get these Memoirs Free By special arrangement with the pub lishers of COLLIER'S, The National: Weekly, we are enabled to offer a lim- i ited number of these three-volume sets 1 of the Memoirs of Napoleon free with ' a year's subscription to Collier's .and this paper. 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