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J ; miss w ai TT iU >77 WILLIAM 1 ^kRmnces & (Copyright, by Relll CHAPTER IV.?Continued. "Ain't she a peach?" asked Jimmy. 'She's my sweetheart and she Is 'bout the swellest sweetheart they is." "She's mine, too." promptly replied Billy, who had fallen in love at first Bight "I's a-goin' to have her fer my sweetheart, too." "Naw, she ain't yours, neither; sbe's mine," angrily declared the other lit tle boy, kicking his rival's legs. "You all time talking 'bout you goin# to have Miss Cecilia for your sweetheart She's done already promised me." "I'll tell you what" proposed Billy, "lemme have her an' you can have Aunt Minerva." "I wouldn't have Miss Minerva to save your replied Jimmy disre spectfully, "her nake ain't no blgger'n that," making a circle of his thumb and forefinger. "Miss Cecilia, Miss Cecilia," he shrieked tantallzingly, "1b my sweetheart." T betcher I have her fer a sweet heart soon as ever I see her," said Billy. "What's your name?" asked Jimmy presently. "Aunt Minerva says It's William Qreen Hill, but 'taln't, it's jest plain Dn'" " ffca KHIa hov. LJXX1J f 1 VO{/VUViVU WWV - "Ain't God a nice, good old man," remarked Billy, after they had swung In silence for a while, with an evident desire to make talk. "That he la," replied Jimmy, en- 1 thusiastically. "He's 'bout the forglv Ingeat person ever was. I just couldn't f get 'long at all 'thout him. It dont ' make no differ'nce what you do or how many times you run off, all you i got to do is Just ask God to forgive you and tell him you're sorry and ain't ( going to do so no more, that night < arhen von mv vour Dravers. and it's i ? ?? ? ? - - - , all right with God. S'poslng he was one of these wants-his-own-way kind - o' mans, he could make hi'self the 1 troublesomest person ever was, and i little boys couldn't do nothing a tall, i I sure think a heap of God. He ain't never give me the worst of it yet." ; "I wonder what he looks like," 1 mused Billy. i "I s'pec' he just looks like the three headed giant in 'Jack the Giant Kill- I er,'" explained Jimmy, " 'cause he's I got three heads and one body. His 1 beads are name' Papa, Son and Holy Ghost, and his body is just name' 1 plain God. Miss Cecilia 'Bplatned it i all tn ma nnrt she 1b 'bout the SDlendid- I est 'splainer they Is. She's my Sun day school teacher." 1 "She's gpln' to be my Sunday school < teacher, too," said Billy, serenely. "Yours nothing; you all time want ' my Sunday school teacher." 1 "Jlmmee!" called a voice from the Interior of the house in the next i yard. "Somebody's a-callin' you," said < Billy. "That ain't nobody but mamma," ex plalhed Jimmy composedly. Vimmee-ee!" called the voice. "jjon i maite no noise, wtuueu un? < little boy; "maybe she'll give up I toreckly." "You Jlmmee!" his mother called I again. Jimmy made n? move to leave the swing. "I don't never have to go 'less she ays 'James Lafayette Garner,' then I got to hustle," he remarked. "Jimmy Garner!" 1 "She's mighty near got me," be said softly; "but maybe shell get tired ' and won't call no more. She ain't i plumb mad yet." i "James Garner!" i "It's coming now," said Jimmy dole fully. I The two little boys sat very still and quiet. 1 "James Lafayette Garner!" The younger child sprang to his ; feet. "I got to get a move on now," he said; "when she calls like that sbe i means business. I betcher she's got < a switch and a hair brush and a slip- : per In her hand right this minute. 1 I'll be back toreckly," he'promised. He was as good as his word, and In < a very short time he was sitting again facing Billy in the swing. i "She just wanted to know where her emhroid'ry scissors was," he ex- I plained. "It don't matter what's lost In that house, I'm always the one l that's got to be 'sponsible and all time i got to go look for It." "Did you find 'em?" asked Billy. "Yep; I went right straight where I left 'em yeste'day. I had 'em trying to cut a piece of wire. I stole, ofT and went down to Sam Lamb's house this morning and tooken breakfast with him and his old woman, Sukey," he boasted. "I knows Sam Lamb," said Billy. "I rode up on the bus with him." "He's my partner," remarked Jimmy. "He's mine, too," said Billy, quickly. ""No, he ain't neither; you ail time talking 'bout you going to have Sam Limb for a partner. You want every thing I got You want Miss Cecilia and you want Sam Lamb. Well, you Just ain't a-going to have 'em. You got to get somebody else for your part ner and sweetheart." "Well, you jest wait an' see," said Billy. "I got Major Minerva." "Shucks, they ain't no major name' that away," and Jimmy changed the 6ubject."Sam Lamb's sow's got seven He Needed N Explosion Follows Volley of Dialects Hurled at Caran, Which Results in His Discharge. Joseph Caran, laborer, tanned to the co'.or of the faded red undershirt he w*.s wearing, was arrested on a tech nical charge the other day, writes the New York correspondent of the Cin cinnati Times-Star, and taken before Magistrate Vooheis. The magistrate scanned the papers placed before him, UNERVA id GREEN HILL oyd Calhoun y & Britton Co.) little pigs. He let me see 'em suck," said Sam Lamb's partner proudly. "He's got a cow, too; she's got the worrisimest horns ever was. I be lieve she's a Bteer anyway." "Shucks," said the country boy, con temptuously. "You do' know a steer when you see one; you can't milk no steer." CHAPTER V. Turning on the Hosq. "Look! Ain't that a snake?" shrieked Billy, pointing to what looked to him like a big snake colled in the yard. "Snake, nothing!" sneered his com panion, "that's a hose. You all time got to call a hose a snake. Come on, let's sprinkle," and Jimmy sprang out of the swing, Jerked up the hose and dragged it to the hydrant "My mam ma don't never 'low me to sprinkle with her hose, but Miss Minerva she's so good I don' reckon she'll care," he cried mendaciously. Billy followed, watched his compan ion screw the hose to the faucet and turn the water on. There was a hiss ing, gurgling sound and a stream of water shot out, much to the rapture of the astonished Billy. "Won't Aunt Minerva care?" he asked, anxiously. "Is she a real 'ligious 'oman ?" "She is the Christlanest woman they is," announced the other child. "Come on, we'll sprinkle the street? and I don't want nobody to get in our way neither." "I wish Wilkes Booth Lincoln could us." said Miss Minerva's nephew. A big, fat negress, with a bundle of clothes tied In a red table cloth on her head, came waddling down the sidewalk. Billy looked at Jimmy and giggled; Jimmy looked at Billy and giggled; then, the latter took careful aim and i stream of water hit the old woman squarely in the face. "Who dat? What's yo' doin'?" she relied, as she backed off. "I's a-gwine to tell yo' pappy, Jimmy Garner," as she recognized one of the culprits. "P'int dat ar hose 'way f'om me, 'fo' [ make yo' ma spank yuh slabsided. I ?ot to git home an' wash. Drap it, I tell yuh!" Two little girls rolling two doll buggies in which reposed two enor mous rag-babies were seen approach ing. "That's Lina Hamilton and Frances Rlark" fiaid Jimmy "thev'ra mv ihums." Billy took a good look at them. "They's goin' to be my chums, too," tie said, calmly. "Your chums, nothing!" angrily cried Jimmy, swelling up pompously. "You all time trying to 'claim my chums. I can't have nothing a tall thout you got to stick your mouth in. You 'bout the selflshest boy they Is. You want everything I got, all time." rne little gins were now quite near md Jimmy hailed them gleefully, for getful of his anger: "Come on, Lina, you and Frances," be shrieked, "and we can have the mostest fun. Billy here's done come to live with Miss Minerva and she's clone gone uptown and don't care if ere sprinkle, 'cause she's got bo much ligion." "But you know none of us are al lowed to use a hose," objected Lina "But It's so much fun," said Jimmy; 'and Miss Minerva 6he's so Christian 3he ain't going to raise much of a rough house, and if she do we can run when we see her codling." "I can't run," said Billy; "I ain't got nowhere run to an'?" "If that ain't just like you. Billy," Interrupted Jimmy, "all time talking bout you ain't got nowhere to run to; yon don't want nobody to have no fun. You 'bout the picayunest boy they Is." Little Ikey Rosenstein, better known as "Goose-Grease," dressed in a cast off suit of his big brother's, with his father's hat set rakishly back on his head and over his ears, was coming proudly down the street some distance off. "Yonder comes Goose-Grease Rosen stein." said Jimmy gleefully. "When he gets right close le's make him hop." "All right," agreed Billy, his good humor restored, "le's baptize him good." "Oh, we can't baptize him," ex claimed the other little boy, " 'cause he's a Jew and the Bible says not to baptize Jews. You got to mesmerize 'em. How come me to know so much?" he continued condescendingly. "Miss Cecilia teached me In the Sun day school. Sometimes I know so much I feel like I'm going to bust She teached me 'bout 'Scuffle little chillens and forbid them not,' and 'bout "Ananias telled Sapphira he done It with his little hatchet,', and 'bout ' 'Lijah jumped over the moon In a automobile.' I know everything what's in the Bible. Miss Cecilia sure Is a cracker-jack; she's 'bout the stylish est Sunday school teacher they Is." " 'Twas the cow jumped over the moon," said Frances, "and it isn't In the Bible; it's in 'Mother Goose.'" "And Elijah went to heaven In a chariot of fire," corrected Lina. "And I know all 'bout Gabr'el," con tinued Jimmy, unabashed. "When folks called him to blow bis trumpet o Interpreter noted the man's name and observed his make-up. "Tell the court Inter preter to come In," said he. The court interpreter burst into a gargle of Sicilian when he beheld Car an. Caran looked stupefied. The In terpreter tried the Neapolitan dialect on him. Caran shook his head. The interpreter tried Basque, half a dozen country dialects of Spanish, and some low French on him. Caran began to he was under the haystack fast asleep." Ikey was quite near by this time to command the attention of the four children. "Let's mesmerize Goose-Grease," yelled Jimmy, as he turned the stream of water full upon him. Frances, Lina and Billy clapped their hands and laughed for Joy. With a terrified and angry shriek their victim, dripping water at every step, ran howling by his tormentors. When he reached a safe distance he turned around, shook a fist at them and screamed back: "My papa is going to have you all arrested and locked up In the cala boose." "Calaboose, nothing!" Jeered Jimmy. "You all the time wanting to put some body in the calaboose 'cause they mes merize you. You got to be mesmer lzed 'cause It's in the Bible." A short, stout man, dressed in neat black clothes, was coming toward them. "Oh, that's the major!'; screamed Billy delightedly, taking the hose and squaring himself to greet his friend of the train, but Jimmy jerked it out of his hand, before either of them no ticed him turning about, aa if for something forgotten. "You ain't got the sense of a one eyed tadpole, Billy," he said. "That's Miss Minerva's beau. He's been lov ing her more'n a million years. My mamma says he ain't never going to marry nobody a tall 'thout he can get Miss Minerva, and Miss Minerva she just turns up* her nose at anything that wears pants. You better not sprinkle him. He's been to the war and got his big toe shot off. He kilt 'bout a million Injuns and Yankees and he's name' Major 'cause he's a Confed'rit vetrun. He went to the war when he ain't but fourteen." "Did he have on long pants?" asked Billy. "I call him Major Minerva?" nioHtro uoiiHo'd o-nt thA nennv 8keeter8," broke in Frances important ly, fussing over her baby, "and I'm going to see Doctor Sanford. Don't you think she looks pale, Jimmy?" "Pale, nothing!" sneered the little boy. "Girls got to all time play their dolls are sick. Naw; I don't know nothing a tall 'bout your Gladys Maude." Lina gazed up the street "That looks like Miss Minerva to me 'way up yonder," she remarked. "I think we had better get away from here before she sees us." Two little girls rolling doll buggies A Stream of Water Hit th? fairly flew down the street and one little boy quickly climbed to the top of the dividing fence. From this safe vantage point he shouted to Billy, who was holding the nozzle of the hose out of which poured a stream of water. "You'd better turn that water ofT 'cause Miss Minerva's going to be madder'n a green persimmon." "I do' know how to," said Billy for lornly. "You turnt it on." "Drop the hose and run to the hy drant and twist that little thing at the top," screamed Jimmy. "You all time got to perpose someping to get little boys in trouble anyway," he added un generously. "You perposed this yo'self," de clared an indignant Billy. "You said Aunt Minerva's so 'ligious she would'nt git mad." "Christian woman's can get Just as mad as any other kind," declared the other boy, sliding from his perch on onH rnnnlne- kPrnsR thfi lawn to disappear behind his own front steps. Holding her skirts nearly up to her knees Miss Minerva stepped gingerly along the wet and muddy street till she got to her gate, where her nep hew met her, looking a little guilty, but still holding his head up with that characteristic, manly air which was so attractive. "William," she said sternly, "I see you have been getting into mischief and I feel It my duty to punish you, so that you may learn to be trust worthy. I said nothing to you about the hose because I did not think you would know how to use it" Billy remained silent. He did not want to betray his little companions of the morning, so he said nothing in his own defense. "Come with me into the house," con tinued his aunt, "you must go to bed at once." But the child protested vigorously. "Don't make me go to bed in the I look Indignant The Interpreter said that It was no good. "Dees-a-man can not understan' not'lng w'at Heye can splk. He mus' be man fom one dem little Islands In da Mediterranean, w'ere dey no speak good Itallano at all-a," said the interpreter. Caran listened with an air of grieved surprise. "It's too bad," said Magistrate Voor heis. "Take him back to the cells. We'll have to hold him until we find some one who can make him under stand." daytime, Aunt Minerva; me an' Wilkes Booth Lincoln ain't never went to bed in the daytime since we's born, an' I ain't never tear tell of a teal 'ligious 'oman a-puttin' a little boy ia bed 'fore it's dark; an' I ain't never a-going to meddle with yo' ole hose no mo'." But Miss Minerva was obdurate, and the little boy spent a miserable hour between the sheets. CHAPTER VI. Successful Strategy. "I have a present for you," said his aunt, handing Billy a long, rectangu lar package. "Thank you, ma'am," said her beam ing nephew as he sat down on the floor, all eager anticipation, and be gan to untie the string. His charm ing, changeful face was bright and happy again, but his expression be came one of Indignant amaze as he saw the contents of the box. "What I want with a doll?" he asked angrily, "I ain't no girl." "I think every little boy snould have a doll and learn to make clothes for it," said Miss Minerva. "I don't want you to be a great, rough boy; I want you to be sweet and gentle like a little girl; I am going to teach you how to sew and cook and sweep, so you may grow up a com iurt w iue. This was a gloomy forecast for the little boy accustomed, as he had been, to the freedom of a big plantation, and he scowled darkly. "Me an' Wilkes Booth Lincoln ain't never hafter play with no dolls sence we's born," he replied sullenly, "we goes in swimmln' an' plays .baseball. I can knock a home-run an' pitch a curve an' ketch a fly. Why don't you gimme a baseball bat? I already got a ball what Admiral Farragut gimme. An* I ain't a-goin* to be no sissy neither. Lina an' Frances plays dolls, me an' Jimmy?" he stopped in sudden confusion. "Lina and Frances and James!" ex claimed his aunt. "What do you know aDout mem, vvunam: The child's face flushed. "I seen 'em this mornln'," he acknowledged. Miss Minerva put a hand on either shoulder and looked straight Into Ms eyes. "William, who started that sprink ling this morning?" she questioned, (sharply. Billy flushed guiltily and lowered his lids; but only for an Instant. Quick ly recovering his composure he re ) Old Woman In the Face. turned her gaze steadily and Ignored her question. "I see yo' beau too, Aunt Minerva," he remarked tranquilly. It was Miss Minerva this time who lost her composure, for her thin, sal low face became perfectly crimson. "My beau?" she asked confusedly. "Who put that nonsense Into your head?" "Jimmy show him to me," he re plied jauntily, once more master of the situation and In full realization of the fact. "Why don't you marry him, Aunt Minerva, so's he could live right here with us? An' I could learn him how to churn. I s'pec' he'd make a beautiful churner. He sho' is a pret ty little fat man," he continued flat teringly. "An' dress? That beau was jest dressed plumb up to the top notch. I sho' would marry him If I's you an' not turn up my nose at him 'cause he wears pants an' you can learn him how to talk properer'n what he do an' I betcher he'd jest nacbelly take to a broom, an' I s'pec' he ain't got nobody 't all to show him how to sew. An' yo' all could get the doctor to fetch you- a little baby so he a monkey, to understhand fwhat this chattering baboon here says to me? If yees can't talk U-nlted States In this court, take me to wan where they do. That's ahll." Magistrate Voorhels looked silently at Caran, took In his violently Latin scenery, and compared It with the obviously Hibernian accents that tumbled over each other on Caran's lips. Then Mr. Voorhels slipped him self a giggle. "Discharged," said Qe. iv,. ... . ... ... at her with his bright, sweet smile. The doll lay neglected on a chair near by and Billy wanted her to forget It "Tell me 'bout Plljerk Peter." "Plljerk Peter?" there was an Inter rogation in her voice. "Yas'm. Ain't you never hear tell 'bout Plljerk Peter? He had fifteen chillens an' one time the las' one of 'em an' his ole 'oman was down with the fever an' he ain't got but one pill an' they so sick they mos' 'bout to die an' ain't nobody in'the flel' fer to pick the cotton an' ho can't git no doctor an' he ain't got but jest that one pill; se he tie that pill to a string an' let the blggea' chile swaller It an' draw It back up an' let tne nex chile swaller it an' jerk it back up an' let the nex' chile Bwaller it an' jerk it back up an' let the nex'?" "I don't believe in telling tales to children," interrupted his aunt, "I will tell you biographical and historical stories and stories from the Bible. Now listen, while I read to you." "An' the nex' chile swaller it an' he jerk it back up," continued Billy se renely, "an' the nex' chile swaller It an' he Jerk it back up tell finely ev'y single one of 'em, plumb down to the baby, swaller that pill an' the las' one of em got well an' that one pill It done the work. Then he tuck the pill and give it to his ole 'oman an' she swaller it an' he jerk it back up but didn't nothin' 't all come up but jest the string an' his ole 'oman she died 'cause all the strenk done gone outer that pill." Miss Minerva opened a book called "Gems for the Household," which she had purchased from a silver-tongued book-agent. She selected an article the subject of which was "The Pure in Heart." Billy listened with a seemingly at tentive ear to the choice flow of words, but in reality his little brain was busy with its own thoughts. The article closed with the suggestion that if one were innocent and pure tie would have a dreamless sleep: "If you have a conscience clear, And God's commands you keep; If vour heart is good and pure, You will have a perfect sleep." Billy's aunt concluded. Wishing to know if he had understood what she had just read she askel: "What people sleep the soundest?" "Niggers," was his prompt reply, as he thought of the long summer days and the colored folk on the plantation. She was disappointed, but not dis couraged. "Now, William," she admonished, "I'm going to read you another piece, and I want you to tell me about it, when I get through. Pay strict atten tion." "Yas'm," he readily agreed. . She chose an article describing tpe keen sense of smell in animals. Miss Minerva was not an entertaining reader and the words were long and fairly incomprehensible to the little boy sitting patiently at her side. Again his thoughts wandered, though every now and then he caught a word or two. "What animals have the keenest sense of smell, William?" was her query at the conclusion of her read ing. "Billy goats," was Billy's answer without the slightest hesitation. "You have goats on the brain," she said in anger. "I did not read one word about billy goats." "Well, If 'taln't a billy goat," he replied, "I do' know what 'tis' thout It's a skunk." , "I bought you a little primer this mornjng," she remarked after a short silence, "and I want you to ?ay a les son every day." "I already knows a lot," he boasted. "Tabernlcle, he an' Mercantile both been to school an' they learnt me an' Wilkes Booth Lincoln. I knows crooked S, an' broken back K, an* curly tall Q, an' roun' O, an' I can spell c-a-t cat, an' d-o-g dog an' A stands fer apple." That night he concluded his ever lengthy prayer at his kinswoman's knee witn: "O Lord, please make for Aunt Minerva a little baby, make her two of 'em. O Lord, If you got 'em to spare please make her three little ba bies an' let 'em all be girls so's she can learn 'em how to churn an' sew. An' bless Aunt Minerva and Major Minerva, f'r ever 'nd ever. Amen." As he rose from his knees he asked: "Aunt Minerva, do God work on Sunday?" "No-o," answered his relative, hes itatingly. "Well, It look like He'd jest hafter work on Sunday, He's so busy jest a-makin' babies. He makes all the nitreers an' heathens an' Injuns an' wouldn't hafter to play with no doll. I sho' wlsht we had him here," ended a selfish Billy, "he could save me a It*! of steps. An' I sho' would like to hear 'bout all them Injuns an' Yan kees what he's killed." Billy's aunt was visibly em barrassed. The persistent admiration ot this, her one lover, had been pleasing to her, yet she had never been willing to sacrifice her Independence for the cares and trials of matrimony. The existing state of affairs between the two was known to every one in the small town, but such was Miss Minerva's dignified aloofness that Bll ly was the first person who had ever dared to broach the subject to her. "Sit down here, William," she com manded, "and I will read to you." "Tell me a tale," he said, looking up "Fwhat the dlvvle," burst out Mr. Pornn ovnlnolirnNr "HM ifaao f Mn It I'TTl white chillens; I reckon He gits some body to help him. Don't you, Aunt Minerva?" CHAPTER VII. Rabbits' and Other Eggs. Billy was sitting in the swing. Jim my crawled over the fence and joined him. "Miss Cecilia's dyeing me some Easter eggs," he said, "all blue and pink and green and relluh and every kind they Is; I tooken her some of our hen's eggs and she Is going to fix 'em for me an' they'll be Just like rabbit's eggs; I reckon I'll have 'bout a million. I'll give you one." he added generously. "I want more'n one," declared Billy, who was used to having the lion's share of everything. "You all time talking 'bout you want more n one egg, saia jimmy. "You 'bout the stingiest Peter they is. Ain't you got no eggs? Get Miss Minerva to give you some of hers and I'll take 'em over and ask Miss Ce cilia to dye 'em for you 'cause you ain't 'quainted with her yet" Smoke or Ride, Which? In the early days of the London. Brighton & South Coast Railway the regulations against smoking were strictly enforced. The Mechanics' Magazine of September, 1842, records that "a foreign gentleman was re cently smoking a cigar in a train com ing from Brighton to London. The guard warned him the practice was uot allowed. Nevertheless, he contin ued to smoke, and finished his cigar. At the next station he was asked for uis ticket and ordered out of the mi!fii< w- iv'. \J "Aunt Minerva ain't got none 'cep'in' what she put under a ol' hen fer to set this mornln'." "Can't you get 'em from under the old hen? Miss Minerva Is euch a Christian woman, she ain't?" "You done fool me 'bout that 'liglou8 business befo'," interrupted Billy, "an' I got put to bed In the day time." "Well, she won't never miss two or three eggs," coaxed Jimmy. "How many did she put under the old hen?" "She put fifteen," was the response, "an' I don't believe she'd want me to "They're 't^it the prettiest eggs ever was," continued the tempter, "all blue and pink and green, and 'bout a million kinds. They're Just perzact ly like rabbit's eggs." "Me an' Wilkes Booth Lincoln ain't never hear teller no rabbit's eggs sence we's born," said Billy; "I don't f berlleve rabbits lays eggs nohow." "They don't lay 'em 'cept to East- e er," said Jimmy. "Miss Cecilia 'splaln- * ed it all to me and she's my Sunday- r School teacher~?nd rabbits is bound , to lay eggs 'cause it's in the Bible and , she's 'bout the prettiest 'splainer they 1 is. I'm going over there now to see 1 'bout my eggs,'*- and he made beUev? t to leave the swing. t "T.o'o no alln rnrni' tr? hen-hoilM an' see what the ol' hen's a-doln'," 1 suggested the sorely tempted Billy. ' "Aunt Minerva is a-tnakln* me some night-shirts an' she ain't takln' no no tice of nothln' else." They tiptoed stealthily around the house to the back-yard, but found the * hen-house door locked. "Can't you get the key?" asked the younger child. "Naw, I can't," replied the other boy, "but you can git in th'oo this here little hole what the chickens goes in at, whiles I watches fer Aunt Minerva. I'll stand right here an' hoi' my cap while you fetches me the eggs. An' don't you take more'n five or six," he warned. "I'm skeered of the old hen," ob-. jected Jimmy. "Is she much of a pecker?" "Naw, she ain't a-goin' to hurt you." was the encouraging reply. "Git up an' crawl th'oo; I'll help you." Billy, having overcome hig*Bsruples, now entered into the undertaking with great zest. Jimmy climbed the chicken ladder, kicked his chubby legs through the , aperture, hung suspended on his fat , little middle for an instant, and final ly, with much panting ana tugging, ] wriggled his plump, round body into j the hen-house. He walked over where a lonesome looking hen was sitting 1 patiently on a nest He put out a cautious hand and the hen promptly gave it a vicious peck. "Billy," he called angrily, "you got to come in here and hold this old chicken; , she's tout the terriblest J pecker t6ey is." Billy stuck his head in the little square hole. "Go at her from behind," ' ' he suggested; "put yo' hand uflder ' her easy like, an' don' let her know ' what you's up to." Jimmy tried to follow these instruc- 1 tions, but received another peck for [ his pains. He promptly mutinied. "If you want any eggs," he de- 1 Hnrori Hrnwlinz at the face framed in 1 the f.perture, "you can come get 'em ( yourself. I done monkeyed with this chicken all I'm going to." So Billy climbed up and easily got I his lean little body through the open ing. He dexterously caught the hen by the nape of the neck, as he had seen Aunt Cindy do, while Jimmy i reached for the eggs. I i "If we ain't done lef my cap out- < side on the groun'," said Billy. "What i we goin' to put the eggs in?" < "Well,< that's just like you, Billy, | you all time got to leave your cap on \ the ground. I'll put 'em in my blouse i till you get outside and then I'll hand ( 'em to you. How manjj you going to ! ] take?" ! j "We might Just as well git 'em all i now," said Billy. "Aunt Cindy say j they's some kinder hens won't lay no j chickens't all if folks put they hands , in they nests an' this here hen look | , like to me she's one of them kind, so , the rester the eggs '11 jest be waste, [** any how, 'cause you done put yo' < han's in her nes', an' a dominicker ain't a-goin' to stan' no projeckin' with her eggs. Hurry up." \ Jimmy carefully distributed the , eggs inside his blouse, and Billy once more crawled through the hole and , stood on the outside waiting, cap in band, to receive them. But the patient hen had at last raised her voice in angry protest and , set up a furious cackling, which so frightened the little boy on the inside that he was panic-stricken. He caught hold of a low roost pole, swung him self up and, wholly unmindful of his blouse full of eggs, pushed his lower 1 A pair of chubby, sturdy legs, down 1 which were slowly tackling little yel- J low rivulets, and half a plump, round ' body were all that would go through. ( "Pull!" yelled the owner of the ' short fat legs. "I'm stuck and can't 1 go no furder. Pull me th'oo, Billy." 1 (TO tJUi l ii^i kjujlj./ ? t None for Him, Thank You. t Representatives Hughes and Kin- j kead of New Jersey and Craven3 of Ar- j kansas, wits of the house, had Just e returned from the funeral of a col league. They were discussing the ^ pomp and publicity of a congressional ? funeral. a "I do not want such a funeral, do p you, 'Gene?" said Mr. Hughes to Mr. Klnkead. j v "No, Billy, I do not care to be put t away with so much display. What t about you, Ben?" said Mr. Kinkead, ^ turning to Mr. Cravens. "I don't want any funeral," respond ed the southerner, dryly.?Washing- ^ ton Correspondence in New York World. : p ! i coupe: and the guard, addressing one of the officers on the platform, warned : t him that that person was not to be : c allowed to proceed to London by any e train that night So there he waa o ieft"?London Chronicle. j p d A Sure Bet. t< "I haven't heard from my son, whc | ci is touring Europe. I am somewhat f* worried." A "What is his next stop?" ii "Monte Carlo." a "Then you'll hear from him.* t< mm m V$3S ^ GOOD MEETING OF 80UTH CAflJ OLINA FIRE FIGHTER8 HA8 CLOSED AT ROCK HILL. IRE PREPARING TO 60 HOME 'almettoes Win Two Race*?Sumter t Wins Consolation Tilt, While Che* ter Runner Captures 8print Wlttf Columbia 8econd.?All Pleased. Rock Hill. ? The last day of th* lremen's convention at this place op ined with the state hose wagon con* est for teams that had not won a -ace. Sumter won first prize in 28 1-JJ jeconds, Rock Hill second prise, in 12 seconds. Greenwood made the run n 32 2-5 seconds and Laurens in 34 icconds. Chester had bad luck again. :heir hose blowing off. Their horse ivas one of the best exhibits here, and s said to have made the fastest time -ecorded to the hydrant, making that n 11 1-2 seconds, against 12 by the Marion horse. John Lattimer, driver .U1 V^UCDMJl, UUBtJl f CO 1111311 lion in this connection, for in the run :he harness came looae on his horse md he stuck to it, w,ith tha horse * pulling practically by the bits. Georgetown had a horse here that nade the run to the hydrant in 15 jeconds, and the horse is 21 years >ld. The time was kept by the same :hree judges, each with a stop watch. rhere was some kicking on the :ime. Especially was this true with :h9 Columbia team. * ; In the state grab reel race New* !>erry won first prise in 18 2-5 sec DndB; Columbia second, in 19 4-6. ., $ uae interstate reei race was won t>y Columbia in 19 seconds and sec ond place by Georgetown in 21 see*, >nds. ; The interstate grab reel race was won by Columbia in 18 3-5 seconds, with Charleston second at 22 1-5. Lex Kluttz of Chester won the foot race, with Floyd Williams of Colum bia second. This concluded the programme, and the teams have packed up and are loading preparatory to going to their respective homes. T. W. Vaughn Breaks Jail. Greenville.?T. U. Vaughn, former superintendent of the Odd Fellows* Orphan Home, located near Green ville, and held a prisoner in the* coun ty jail since May 31 on a serious charge, the alleged victim being an orphan girl under his care, sawed his way to liberty and flees before the pursuing arm' of the law, wjth the adds greatly in his favor. Jailer Phil tips was aroused by a negro woman prisoner who was confined in a cell on the second floor above Vaughn's sell, telling him that some one was escaping from below. Before the jailer could reach the cell the bird tiad flown. The Charleston Whiskey Cases. Columbia.?Attorney General Lyoi 3aid that he had not been requested to bring action against those charged with graft in connection with the ; ' Charleston whiskey situation. It Is expected that the legislative Investi gating committee will be called to meet at an early date in Columbia, when Henrv Doscher. Santos Sottile a.nd P. J. B. O'Neill of Charleston will be subpoenaed to appear and testify. Several witnesses appearing before the legislative committee in Charles* ton recently charged that these men had collected a certain amount from them each month and that,they gave i guarantee of protection from the whiskey constables. Voung Man Drowned in Broad River. Columbia.?Leonard Riley, of Salu ia, a student at Draughon's business college, was drowned in Broad river while in swimming with a party of 3chool mates. Up to a late hour his body, had not been recovered, al though the search for it was still go ing on. The boy's relatives in Saluda were notified of his death by Coroner Walker. Registration of Teachers Is 43. Columbia. ? The registration ot teachers who have entered upon study it the summer school at the Univer sity of South Carolina has reached 43'. Each day has witnessed an increase n the enrollment, and the half hun Ired expected by Superintendent Slarkson will doubtless enter in the lear future. Most of the teachers tak ng the course are women, but three nen are in attendance. This is not he least interesting fact in conneo ion with the school, and much inter ist has been displayed in the work. Joy Hurt When Fountain Explodes. Rock Hill.?While Max Bryant, Jr., yas charging a soda fountain at the Jims Drug Company he detected that lomething was working wrong and roceeded to make a dash for the loor. He hollered at a negro boy who ras assisting him to get away, but he boy was not quick enough and the ank exploded tearing it all to pieces. ?he negro was of course badly fright ned and was seriously cut in several laces but after being treated seemed o be not much the worse for his ex perience. Lutheran College Nearly Completed. Lexington.?It is announced thai he new Lutheran college for girls, re ently established by the joint confer nce of the Tennessee and South Car lina synods at Summerland, will be eady to accommodate about 75 stu ents at the beginning of the fall ?rm. The board of trustees are now, ompleting the arrangements. The iculty has not been named as yet. s only 75 can be accommodated dur lg the first term, the trustees are nxious for those who wish to enter ) put in their applications early. i yJ!