The Abbeville press and banner. (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, March 27, 1912, Image 2
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JEW SCORED ON ARISTOCRAT
lil-Bred Remark Brought Discomfiture
on Duke of Westminster and
His Companion.
A friend of mine who is In Cairo
Just now told me a good story in i
recent letter of an old Jew of ^at
city who scored off the young duke of
Westminster and his inseparable com
panion, Lord Ricksavage, when they
were there a few weeks ago. They
were buying some jewelry in the bazar
there, and the duke remarked audibly
to his friend:
"Th? fool Riipak Enetish of I
course." But the fool understood well
enough.
"Do you spik Italian?" he asked
them, to which they replied in the neg
ative.
"Do you spik Grlk?"
"No."
"Do. you spik Turk?"
"No."
"Do you spik Russian?"
"No."
"Me one time fool," said the old
man after a short but eloquent pause;
"you five time fool!" And the duke
and his friend retired discomfited.?
Exehanee.
"t
Cholly?What's the time, old chap?
I've an invitation to dinner at seven,
and mv watch isn't eoine.
Gussie?Why, wasn't your
Invited, too, deah boy?
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Many a man can't afford to dress
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ITCH. ITCH relieved in 30 minutes by
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A sermon is either based on a text
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S Z. HERE are many kinds of
T fools. Now, will every
body please sit still until
they are called upon spe
ciflcally to rise?
V I had been every kind
ot '00' wc?Pt one. I had
Ai expended my patrimony
pretended my matrimony,
played poker, lawn-tennis, and bucket
shops?parted soon with my money In
many ways. But there remained one
role of the wearer of cap and bells
that I had not played. That was the
seeker after burled treasure. To few
does the delectable furor come. But
of all the would-bo followers In the
hoof-prints of King Midas none has
found a pursuit so rich in pleasurable
promise.
But, going back from my theme a
while?as lame pens must do?I was a
fool of the sentimental sort. I saw
May Martha Mangum, and was hers.
8he was eighteen, the color of the
white ivory keys of a new piano, beau
tiful. and possessed by the exquisite
solemnity and pathetic witchery of an
unsophisticated angel doomed to live
in a small, dull, Texas prairie-town.
May Martha's father ?as a man hid
den behind whiskers and spectacles.
He lived for bugs and butterflies and
all Insects that fly or crawl or buzz
or get down your back or In the but
ter. He was an entomologist, or words
to that effect. He spent his life
seining the air for flying fish of the
June-bug order, and then sticking pins
through 'em and calling 'em names.
T^here was another besides myself
who thought May Martha Mangum
one to be desired. That was Good
loe Banks, a youDg man Just nome
from college. He had all the attain
ments to be found In books?Latin,
Greek, philosophy and especially the
higher branches of mathematics and
logic.
If it hadn't been for his habit of
pouring out this information and learn
ing on every one that he addressed
I'd have liked' him pretty well. But,
even as It was, he and I were, yoju
would have thought, great pals.
But, in our talks together and In our
visits and conversation with May
Martha, nelthe^ Goodloe Banks nor
I could find out which one of us she
preferred. May Martha was a natural
born non-committal; and knew in her
Hlo knnr tr\ Wonn nannlo cnioaainir
Old Man Mangum certainly was
absent-minded. After a long time he
found out one day?a little butterfly
must hare told him?that two young
men were trying to throw a net over
the head of the young person,.a daugh
ter, or some such technical appen
dage, who looked after his comforts.
I never knew scientists could rise
to such occasions. Old Mangum oral
ly labeled and classified Goodloe and
myself easily among the lowest or
ders of the vertebrates; and In Eng
lish, too, without going any further In
to Latin than the simple references
to Orgetorlx, Rex Helvetll?which Is
as far as I ever went myself. And
he told us that If he ever caught us
around his house again he would add
us to his collection.
Goodloe Banks and I remained away
five days, expecting the storm to sub
side. When we dared to call at the
house, again May Martha Mangum and
her father were gone. Gone! The
house they had rented was closed.
Their little store of goods and chat
tels was gone also.
And not a word of farewell to eith
er of us from May Martha?not a
white, fluttering note pinned to the
hawthorn-bush; not a chalk mark on
the gat$ post nor a postcard In the
postofflce to give ua a clue.
For two months Goodloe Banks and
I?separately?tried every scheme we
could think of to track the runaways.
We used our friendship and influence
with the ticket agent, with livery sta
ble men, railroad conductors, and our
one lone, lorn constable, but without
results. *
In talking things over one after
noon he said to me:
"Suppose you do find her, Ed, where
by would you profit? Miss Mangum
has a mind. Perhaps it is yet un
cultured, but she is destined for high
er things than you could give her. I
have talked with no one who seemed
to appreciate more the enchantment
of the ancient poets and writers and
the modern cults that have assimilat
ed and expanded their philosophy of
life. Don't you think you are wasting
your time looking for her?"
"My Idea." said I, "of a happy home
In an eight-room house Id a grove of
live oaks by the side of a charco on a
Texas prairie. A piano," I went on.
"with an automatic player In the sit
ting room, three thousand head of cat
tle under fence for a starter, a buck
board and ponies always hitched at a
post for 'the missus'?and May Martha
Mangum to spend the profits of the
ranch as she pleases, and to abide
with me, and put my slippers and pipe
away every day in places where they
cannot be found of evenings. That,"
said I. "Is what Is to be?and a fig,
a dried, Smyrna, dago-stand fig for
your curriculums, cults and philos
ophy."
"She Is meant for higher things,"
repeated Goodloe Banks.
"Whatever she Is meant for," I an
gwered, "just now she fa out of pock
et. And I shall find her as soon a3
I can without aid of the colleges."
'The game is blocked," said Good
loe, putting down a domino; aud we
had the beer.
Shortly after that a young farmer
whom 1 knew came into town and
brought me a folded blue paper. He
' ' ? * - 1 1 X * J1-.J *
aid ais graiiaiaiaer uau just uieu. i
Modern E
Fashion?A device of foreign dreBB
makers and tailors to make sane per
sons appear ridiculous at great ex
pense to themselves.
Love?A sentiment which the
statesman has for power, the painter
for art, the' maid for a man, some
men for their wives, and all men for
money.
Money?A medium of exchange, in
the use of which one man gets the
concealed a tear; and he went on to
say that the old man had jealously
guarded this paper for 20 years. He
left It to his family as part of his es
tate, the rest of which consisted of
two mules and a hypotenuse of non
arable land.
The sheet of paper was of the old
blue kind used during the Civil war.
It was dated June 14, 1863; and
It described the hiding place of ten
burro-loads of gold and silver coin
valued at $300,000. Old Rundle?grand
father of his' grandson, Sam?was
given the information by a Spanish
priest who was in on the treasure
burying, and who died many years
before?no, afterward?in old Rundle's
house. Old Rundle wrote it down
from dictation.
"Why didn't your father look this
up?" I asked young Rundle.
"He went blind before he could do
so," he replied.
"Why didn't you hunt, for ijt your
self?" I asked.
"Well," said he. "I've only known
about the papter for ten years. First
there was the spring plowin' to do,
and then choppln' the weeds out of
the corn; and then comextakln' fod
der; and mighty soon winter was on
us. It seemed to run along that way
year after year."
That sounded perfectly reasonable
to me, so I took It up with young Lee
Rundle at once.
The directions on the paper were
simple. The whole burro cavalcade
laden with the treasure started from
an old Spanish mission in Dolores
county. They traveled due south by the
compass until they reached the Ala
mito river. They forded this, and
buried the treasure on the top of a
little mountain shaped like a pack
saddle standing In a row between two
higher ones. A heap of stones
marked the place of the burled treas^
ure. All the party except the Span
ish priest were killed by Indians a few
days later. The secret waa a pionop
oly. It looked good to me.
Lee Rundle suggested that we rig
out a camping' outfit, hire a surveyor
to run out the line from the Spanish
mission, and then spend the $300,000
seeing the sights in Forth Worth. But
without being highly educated, I knew
a way to save time and expense.
We went to the state rand office,
and had a practical, what they call
a "working" sketch made of all the
surveys of land from the old mission
to the Alamito river. On this map
1 drew a line due southward to the
river. The length of lines of each sur
vey and section of land was accur
ately given on the. sketch. By these
we found the point on the river and
had a "connection" made with it, and
an important, well-identified corner of
the Los Animos five-league survey?a
grant made by King Philip of Spain.
By doing this we 'did not nee! to
have the line run out by a surveyor.
It was a great saving of expense and
time.
So, Lee Rundle and I fitted out a
two-horse wagon team with all the
accessories, and drove a hundred and
forty-nine miles to Chico, the near
est town to the point we wished to
reach. There we picked up a depu
ty county surveyor. He found the
corner of the Los Animos sufvey for
us, ran out the five thousand seven
hundred and twenty varas west that
our sketch called for, laid a stone on
the spot, had coffee and bacon, and
caught the mail-stage back to Chico.
I was pretty sure we would get that
$300,000. Lee Rundle's was to be only
one-third because I was paying all the
expenses. With that $200,000 I knew
I could find May Martha Mangum if
she was on earth. And with it I could
flutter the butterflies In old man Man
gum's dove-cot, too. If I could find
that treasure!
But Lee and I established camp.
Across the river were a dozen little
mountains densely covered by cedar
brakes, but not one shaped like a
pack-saddle. That did not deter us.
Appearances are deceptive. A pack
saddle, like beauty, may exist only in
the eye of the beholder.
I and the grandson of the treasure
examined those cedar-covered hills
With the care of a lady hunting for
a wicked flea. We explored every side,
top, circumference, mean elevation,
angle, slope and concavity of every
one for two miles up and down the
river. We spent four days doing so.
mi ? ? UU-UftJ ?r\ fKrt rr*o n onH tho
1 Iieil we UILLUCU up lUO luau UUU tuw
dun, and hauled the remains of the
cofFee and bacon the 149 miles back to
Concho City. . . ,
As shortly as could be after our
empty return Goodloe Banks and I
foregathered in the back room of Sny
der's saloon to play dominoes and fish
for information. I told GoodlOe about
my expedition after the buried treas
ure.
"If I could have found that three
hundred thousand dollars," I said to
him, "I could have scoured and sifted
the face of the earth to find May Mar
tha Mangura."
"She is meant for higher things,"
said Goodloe. "I shall find her my
self. But, tell me now you went aDout
discovering the spot where this un
earthed increment was imprudently
burled."
I told him in the smallest detail. I
showed it In the draftsman's sketch
with the distances marked plainly
upon it.
)efinitions
worst of It; also, a fuel much affected
by cold propositions in search of a
hot time.
Mortgage?A new style of roof for
financially shaky individuals with a
penchant for motoring. Proof against
an immediate rainy day, but power
less against falling due.
Obituary?A verbal post mortem
mantle that covereth a multitude ot
sins.
"Away," J said, "away wit/i)
sna y&riat/on&f"
After glancing over it in a masterly
way, he leaned back in his chair and
bestowed upon me an explosion of sar
donic, superior, collegiate laughter.
"Well, you are a fool, Jim," he said,
when he could speak..
"Wb# am I a fool?" I asked. "Buried
treasure has been found before in
many places."
"Because," said he, "in calculating
the nolnt on the river where your line
would strike, you neglected to allow
for the variation. The variation there
would be nine degrees west Let me
have your pencil."
Goodloe Banks figured rapidly on
the back of an envelope.
"The distance, from north to south,
of the line run from the Spanish
mission," said he, "is exactly 22 miles.
It was run b7 a pocket compass, ac
cording to your, etory. Allowing for
the variation, the point on the Alamito
river where you should have searched
for your treasure is exactly six miles
and nine hundred and forty-five varas
farther west than the place you hit
upon. Oh, what a fool you are, Jim!"
He smiled in his superior way; and
then I saw come out In his face the
singular, eager, consuming cupidity of
the seeker after buried treasure.
"Sometimes," he said with the air
of the oracle, "these old traditions of
hidden money are not without foun
dation. Suppose you let me look over
that paper describing the location.
Perhaps together we might?"
The result was that Goodloe Banks
and I, rivals in love, became compan
ions in adventure. We went to Chlco
by stage from Huntersburg, the near
est railroad town. In Chlco we hired
a team drawing a covered spring wag
on and camping paraphernalia. We
had the same surveyor run out our
distance as revised by Goodloe and his
variations, and then dismissed him
and sent him on bis homeward road.
It was night when we arrived. I fed
the horses and made a Are near the
bank of the river and cooked supper.
Goodloe would have helped; but his
education had not fitted him for prac
tical things.
But, while I worked he cheered me
with the expression of great thoughts
handed down from the dead ones of old.
He quoted some translations from the
Greek at much length.
The next morning wa3 a bright June
one. We were up early and had break
fast. Goodloe was charmed. He re
cited?Keats, I think it was, and Kelly
or Shelley, while I broiled the bacon.
Goodloe was looking at old Rundle's
document when he ripped out a most
uncouegiaie swear-wuru.
"Come here," he said, holding the
paper up against tl sunlight. "Look
at that," he said, laying his finger
against it.
On the blue paper?a thing I had
never roticed before?I saw stand out
in white letters the words and fig
ures: Malvern, 1898."
"What about it?" I asked.
"It's the water mark," said Good
loe. "The paper was manufactured in
1898. The writing on the paper is da
ted 1863. This is a palpable fraud."
"Oh, I don't know," said I. "The
Rundles are pretty reliable, plain, un
educated country people. Maybe the
paper manufacturers tried to perpe
trate a swindle."
And then Goodloe Banks went as
wild as his education permitted. He
dropped the glasses off his nose and
glared at me.
"I've often told you you were a
I
Deep Thinker.
The new teacher was somewhat un
certain as to the nationality of her
latest charges. She was not kept long
in doubt, however. "Yoke," she wrote
on the board, then asked in her most
' musical tones, as she looked graciously
round the class. "Can any little boy
or girl tell me the meaning of that
word?"
A small blond boy raised his hand,
i "Ay know," he said hoarsely, "it?it
' ! ess when you say somet'ing funny."?
j Woman's Home Companion.
/our ysaier' marJca
fool," he said. "You have let yourself
be Imposed upon by a clodhopper.
And you have imposed upon me."
I rose and pointed a large pewter
spoon at him, fresh from the diah wa
ter.
"Goodloe Banks," I said, "I care not
one parboiled navy bean for your edu
cation. I always barely tolerated it in
any one, and I despised it in you.
What has your teaming done for you?
It is a curse to vtAirself and a bore to
your friends. Away," I said, "away
with your water marks and varia
tions! ' They are nothing to me. They
shall not deflect, me from my quest."
I pointed with my spoon across the
river to a small mountain shaped like
a pack saddle.
"I am going to search that moun
tain," I ;went on, "for the treasure.
Decide now whether you are In It or
not. If you wish to let a water mark
or a variation shake your soul, you are
no true adventurer. Decide."
A white cloud of dust began to rise
far down the river road. It was the
mall wagon from Hesperus to Chlco.
Goodloe flagged It.
"I am done with the swindle," said
he qourly. "No one but a fool would
pay any attention to that paper now.
Well, you always were a fool, Jim. I
leave you to your fate."
He gathered hi? personal traps,
climbed Into the mail-wagon, adjust
ed his glasses nervously, and flew
away In a cloud of dust1.
I Investigated the hill shaped like a
pack saddle from base to summit. I
found an absolute absenci of signs re
lating to burled treasure. There was
no pile of stones, no ancient blazes on
the trees, none or the evidences of the
three hundred thousand dollars, as set
forth In th* document of old man
Rundle.
I came down the hill In the cool of
the afternoon. Suddenly, out of the
cedar-brake I stepped into a beautiful
green valley, where a tributary small
stream ran into the Alamlto river.
And there I was startled to see what
I took to be a wild man, with unkempt
beard and ragged hair, pursuing a
giant butterfly with brilliant wings.
"Perhaps he is an escaped m?d
mau," I thought; and wondered how
he had strayed so far from seats of
education and learning.
And then I took a few more steps
and saw a vine-covered cottage near
the small stream. And, in a little
grassy glade, I saw May Martha Man
nlnnlrlniy tvIM flnwPffi
6"?" FAl,v-"4"0 -*.v? *-w..
She straightened up and looked at |
me. For the first time since I knew
her I saw her face?which was the
color of the white keys of a new pi
ano?turn pink. I walked toward her
without a word. She let the gathered
flowers trickle slowly from her hand
to the grass.
"I knew you would come, Jim," she
said clearly. "Father wouldn't let m?
write, but I know you would come."
What followed you may guess?
there was my wagon and team just
across the river.
I've often wondered what good too
much education Is to a man if he can't
use it for himself. If all the benefits
of it are to go to others where does
It come In?
For, May Martha Mangum abides
with me. There is an eight-room j
house in a live oak grove, and a piano
with an automatic player, and a good
start toward the three thousand head
of cattle is under fence.
Historic Titles Scarce.
When electing their designations, ;
new peers have to remember that, j
once a title has been held by a mem- i
ber of the royal family It will never j
subsequently be bestowed upon a sub- j
Ject not of royal blood. This rule |
bars the adoption for titles ttie name
of every Knglish county. No wonder
new peers are beginning to fall bacK
on names of rivers and streets and
that Lord Selby struck out In a new
it:e by choosing his wile's surname
London Chronicle.
VJV?pn cVimxm TWQitivf* nnH
ed many cas<
conclude tha
benefit her if suffering with 1
Here are five letters from :
the efficiency of Lydia E. Pin
Elliston, Va.?"I feel it my duty t
great medicine. I wai & Batterer fit
fined in bed over one third of my tia
housework and had fainting1 spells &
alone for five minutes at a time.
" Now I owe my health to Lydia E.
Blood Purifier. Whenever I see a suf
these medicines have done for me an
them."?Mrs. Eobebt Blajtkknship,
- ? . " " <' 'ii
New Orleans. La.?"I was passing
fore I took Lydia E. Pinkham's Vege
hot flashes, weak and dizzy feelings, 1
get up in the morning feeling tired o
" Since I have been taking yonr G
right. Your medicines are worth tl
Blondeau, 1541 Polymnia St., New 0
Wauchula, Fla.?" Some time ago
toms, headache, backache, bearing-do'
by female troubles.
" I got two bottles of Lydia E PL
package of Sanative Wash and that wi
" I am satisfied that if I had done
not taken vour remedies, I would hav
LETTER FEC
LETTER FROI
LETTER FRC
in time with the right medicine and
either. I feel that von are a friend
your remedies than hare a doctor.
chula, Florida.
LETTER FROM 1
Martinsbnrg, W. Va.?"I am glad-1
table Compound has done wonders foi
" I have told dozens of people abou
she hears a girl complaining with era
pound."?Mrs. Mabt A. Hockxbbbbb
ANOTHER LETTEI
Newport News, Va.?"About fire yei
and bloating every month that I won
"A friend told me to take Lydia E.
I soon found relief. The medicine b1
doctor approved of my taking it.
"I will be glad if my testimony
from female weakness."?Mrs. W.J. B
mews, va.
Why don't you try t
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Our fTM "Vassllns" Booklet tolls too many
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HAD THE HABFT.
JHe (nervousiyj?wnai wm your la
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She?He'll be delighted, dear. He
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"Of courue not. It Is a drawn bat
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A long life and a merry one may be ex
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A Diplomat.
"Don't ask a girl for a kiss un
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"Unless you want one?"
"No, unless you don't."
ONLY ONE "BBOMO QUININK."
That Is LAXATIVB BHOMO QuiNINB. Look for
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Some men give a dollar with one
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/if PI/)/]
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Cr a little water from the human ?y
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take an alterative and glyceric extract
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r ' v
iie<c
reliable proof that a certain
is of female ills* wouldn't any
t the same remedy would also
the same trouble?
southern women which prove
kham's Vegetable Compound.
m VIBGINIA.
o express my thanks to you sod you*
3m female troubles and had been oon
e for ten months. I eonld not do my
a that my husband coold not leave me
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound and
feting1 woman 1 want to tell her what
d I will always speak a good word for
Ellis ton, Montgomery Co., Va.
tt LOUISIANA
through the Change of Life and ba
table Compoond I was troubled with
backache and irregularities. I would
at and not fit to do anything.
impound and Blood Purifier I feel all
leir weight in gold." ? Mrs. Gabtox
rleans, La.
m FLORIDA.
I wrote to you giving you my symp
wn, and discomfort in walking, caused
ikham's Vegetable Compound and a - -
all I used to make me a well woman.
> like a good many women, and ha4 ~
e been a great sufferer. Bat I started
. got welL It did not cost very much . ''
to all women and I would rather use /
-Mrs. Mattde Hodsot, Box 406, Wau
PTEST VIRGINIA.
bo say that Lydia ?. Pinkham's Veg?*
r my mother, daughter and myself.
t it and my daughter says that when
mpo, she tells her to take your Com
r, 713 N. 3rd St., Martinsbnrg^7. Va.
I FROM VIRGINIA.
irs ago I was troubled with soch pains
Id have to go to bed.
. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound and
Srengthened me in every way and my
~
will help some one who is suffering
LAYT07,1029 Hampton Ave^ Newport 'i / %
'
fil? reliable remedv?
TANG
9t home remedy
mmend it (or its
cttona of tlM akio,
a colds and coughs,
las.
*?n in wtotafc
kit copy today.
? Company
Now York
LINIMENT
For Cows' Caked Udder.
Mrs. Julia Letter, Colombo*. Ga., write*:
"I tried your Mustang Liniment on * I
cow that was suffering' from Caked Udder
and in a few days she was in good shape [
again. It's a good liniment."
2Sc.50c.fl abottk at Dntc A GulStan* |
Or. M. G. KREITZER'S
10c SALVE 25c
had been in use over 50 years. Should
always be kept in the house ready for day
emergency. Its soothing and healing quali
ties make it unexcelled in the treatment of
SWELLINGS, FRESH WOUNDS, BOILS.
BURNS, CARBUNCLES, FELONS, SCALDS
TUMORS, ULCERS, CORNS, BUNIONS,
SORES, TC. For sale by druggists or
mailed direct on receipt of price. For a
cents we will mail, you a sample box.
W. C. POWER & CO., 1536 N. 4th St. ,PhiIadelphiarPa.
XANTHINE
FOR THE
HAIR
Restores Gray Hair to Natural Color
KUOTO DASMinr AID BCVMT
Inrlgoratesand prevents thehalr from falling off
r?r Sal* kj DraftUU, or Brat Direct ky
XANTHINE CO., Richmond, Virginia
Mm $1 Far Botticj Suflt D?UW U? Swd
KODAKS D?g%$?!8a
Boatman and Anseo Alms, mailed poev
paid. Mall orders given prompt attention.
Any slae roll dim developed for lOcenU.
PARSONS OPTICAL CO.
244 Klug Street, Charleston, 8. C.
2.UW A. U1CE LAND IX BEHT1E CO., N. C.;
uear Windsor; 450 a. cult.; 12,000,000 ft. lum
ber, saw mills, stock, ginnery; 7 r. dwelling. 14
bouses, 2 warehouses. wUarf. etc. Will aell all or
timber only. SPRCILL, Box 319. Chicago.
)d
item whea
ist at Dr.
tells the
exhaustion
lations are
part of the
mm under
tinin
ig the best
I to those
atement of
method of
ishment of
when you
: of roots,
Medical Discovery
motes the flow of digestive juices, re
lation perfect, invigorates the liver and
i the great'blood-maker, flesh-builder
es men strong in body, active in mind
ask for!
* to Printers
ik made in Savannah, Ga. by
, Savannah, Ga, Price 6 cents
ih. Your patronage solicited.