Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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A Complex Rest. Cure. "Bliggins is a very vociferous person." "Yes," replied Miss Cayenne, "but | I don't blame him. The way a man of his mentality rests his nerves is by I talking so loud he can't hear himself think."?Washington Star. I It is estimated that 60.000-horse power can be easily develoned from I the St. Lawrence River. It's a long honeymoon, thinks Life, | that has no alimony. ? l A Package Mailed Free on Request of MUNYON'S ! PAW-PAW PILLS SThe best Stomach and Liver Pills known and a positive and speedy cure for Constipation. Indigestion, Jaundice. rJiiiousness. Sour Stomach, Headache, and all ailments arising from a disordered stomach or sluggish liver. They contain in concentrated form all the irtues and values of Munyon's PawPaw tonic and are made from the ' Juice or tne raw-raw mut. x Uuliesltatlngly recommend these pills as being the best laxative and cathartic rer compounded. Send us postal or ; letter, requesting a free package of Uunyon's Celebrated Paw-Paw Laxative Pills, and we will mail sSme free of charge. MUNYON'S HOMOEOPATHIC HOME REMEDY CO.. 53d and Jefferson Sts., Philadelphia. Pa. Pimples blackheads and oily skin may be quickly overcome by the frequent i use of . Glenn's \ ' Sulphur Soap I Sold by I13T. Hjjt sad WWker Dye. J drujyiits. Uadi of brown. 56c. DAISY FIXKILLER N eat. c I e a a. oroamen, tel. cofavenleet. clv*ap. U1 iuiei. Made of metal, cannot .Spilt er ttp over, will not soil or Injure aaythin?. Guaranteed eKectWe. -Of all dealers or sear prepaid for 20 cents. < SAKOLD lOinl ' \ 130 DeZslb At*. ' \Bfootlm. g.T.1 jiSZs MOTHER CRAY'S SWEET POWDERS Iff FOR CHILDREN, A Certain Gate for FeverinhneM, Constipation, Headache, NtomachTroable*, Tsethlnu *M Disorders, and DestruT , -t agOier Gra?, Wornm. They Break up Col da - Bnreein Chila- hi 34 hcura. AtftllDragKiata, iocts. ngi, Home, Sample mailed FREE. Address. W^Yorkcft* A. S. OLMSTED. LeRoy.N.Y rJj*}?? f ? A r>-/ Tills is an IntereHtlnjj IY\Vo 17C ?1*70 story that win ! V O iT awaken you to a sad i * realization that vou are not receiving the toll earning po wer of your savings. Write for our booklet, "How to Save," (through our Real Kstate Bonds,) for the asking. Department A. : THE DEBENTURE CORPORATION OF NEW YORK J. 334 Fifth Avenue New York City His Changing Calling. Dr. Harvey W. Wiley, the Govern meat food expert, was talking of a > "new sort" of food preservative. "They are all the same thing under different names," he said. It reminded him of the old caretaker of I an Episcopal church, of whom he 7 once heard. This old fellow, as he sat on a tomb in the churchyard, dismissed as trivial the question of his proper title. "The good old creed keeps 'he same for all," he said, "though they r may change the words they use. '! Look at me, here. I used to be a panltor. Then we had a parson who called me the sextant. Dr. Thirdly give me the name of virgin. And the young man we've got now says I'm the sacrilege."?Youth's Com pamuu. J Knowledge Worth Having. The cut-and-dry knowledge which i is acquired from the study of manuals or from so-called crammers is Tery apt to share the fat* of cut flowers. It makes a brilliant show for one evening, but it fades and i leaves nothing behind. The only knowieage worth having, and which ! lasts us for life, must not be cut-and' dry, but, on the contrary, it should , be living and growing knowledge, knowledge of which we/know the beginning, the middle add the end, j knowledge of which we can produce [ the title deeds whenever they are called for. That knowledge may be small in appearance, but, remember, the knowledge required for life is really very small.?Max Muller. A Taste i A Smile And satisfaction to1 the last ! mouthful?-j Post Toasties ^There's pleasure in every package. A trial will show the fascinating flavour: . Served right from the pack-' ; age with cream or *milli and sometimes fruit?fresh.or j stewed.. i "The Memory Lingers" PK?s. 10c and 15c. | Sold by Grocara, Post am Cereal Co., Ltd."1 Battle Creek, Mich. ^??w? DOLEFUL BALLAD OF A HERMIT, t t BY J. K. B. e Thorp was a Hermit mild and good. Who owned a modest little cot ? Close to the borders of a wood, u And happy was his lot. v So kind he was to bird and beast. p They loved liini as their dearest friend; d They often shared his frugal feast j>( And he the sick would tend. a j One night upon his cottage door d j There came a most emphatic knock, f( i And still another one. before 0 I His hand could reach the lock. o ! He opened, and to his amaze K There stood a little brownish bird ji With head aslant and jaunty gaze, Who said, "At last you've heard!" k I "I'll take a shelter for the night," tl Said he. excruciating bold, a, j ''There is no other hut in sight, ' Besides, it's rather cold." 8 J he gentle Hermit stared aghast, tl So saucy was his little guest, _ j But spread an adequate repast, I Ana bade him take his rest. u tl j The bird just winked his beady eye, ^ Said he, "My friend, I've come to stay: . I'll build a nest or two near by, And never move away." ai u And so it was. Before you'd think j Some hundreds of his cousins mustered; , The Hermit could not sleep a wink. tc So loud they screamed and blustered. Until at last thev drove him out, ' j Which grieved his neighbors to the marrow, bi I And long ere this you've guessed, no doubt, This Person was an English Sparrow. *v -I. F. B. 1 a I "t ^ * d< | When Pa Kicked Oyer the Traces b< I By GERTRUDE G. BLAISDELL. T ai i tfc j Ma looks out of the window, fan- ^ j ning herself vigorously with her blue aj j checked gingham apron. w "It beat the Dutch," she says to hi Arvylla, the younger daughter. "It j loes beat the Dutch how your Pa ji, j tramps over to the neighbor's for water. Here's our cistern full and all 1 we need is drinking water brought, ! and by actual count that's the eleventh time he has fetched a pail today." ' Why, Ma," says Arvylla, as she drops the pea pods in the wide basket, and glances down the path at her * father as he plods along between the J31 banks of blossoming roses. "Why, n Ma, we don't drink no eleven pails of re water a day. at "Land sakes alive, Arvylly, of ar course we don't; he jist pours it out *'! and says he thinks he'll get some m fresh water. I'm nfrairl T'm afraiH ^ Arvylly, that something dretful ails m your pa. Now his consin, Sallie Brown, her that was Sallie Perkins. f* | died with some such an ailment, and " I that is jist the way she acted, was always thinkin* about fresh water, would drink a hull pail at a time, so they said." The tears were coursing down Ma's re placid face and Arvylla looked up scared and white, -"Oh, Ma," she 1 gasps, "Don't." Meanwhile. Pa, the object of their sa concern, plods along the path and 30 into the yard of their neighbor. m Thoughts and impulses to which he had always before been stranger surge through Pa's gentle breast. | Heretofore life has held for him only u< ' his "wimmenfolks." Ma and the 01 | girls have been the sum and sub- ^ | stance of his existence. When a k* j few years before they had decreed j that the old farm should be sold and ! a home made in town, Pa had not deI murred. "Ma knows best," he said. sc | What if out behind the barn with no ' one to see but old Rover, a few tears I had trickled down the withered old Pl i cheeks. The "wimmenfolks" had w | never known. He had said good-by to the dear old farm where his whole cl : lite Had Deen spent, to the cows and a* ! horses, the lambs and calves. No one | had known the cost to the poor old >'c ! man. No one unless it was Rover i who looked up in his eyes in such a di J sympathetic way that Pa felt he un derstood, even if Ma and the girls did not. Poor Rover, town had been d< j too much for the farm dog and the T syringa bush had blossomed over his w ! grave now for two seasons. ? Four weeks ago when Pa had gone to the neighbor's for a pail of water. j there, in the woodshed, curled up bej side their savage little mother, were m i six of the plumpest, most winning jr fox terrier puppies possible to im- tt agine. That was the beginning. The tt puppies were very friendly and soon SI would scamper to meet him, growl- ^ ; ing and barking and jumping about ! him in delight and Pa enjoyed the tt | frolic even better than they. e; "Better take one, Mr. Perkins." ^ said the neighbor pleasantly. But p, ' Ma and the girls had instantly vej toed such a possibility when Pa had j timidly suggested it. ^ "What, a puppy track in' over my j ! clean floors, well, I guess not," ? j gasped Ma, | Jg une aay wnen fa went over there t( were only five bright-eyed, frisky j puppies left. The next day Fatty was tl gone. To-day there is only one, but ^ the brightest and best of the lot j thinks Pa as he grabs little Spotty I up. "Oh, Spotty, Spotty, I can't let 11 I you go, I can't," he groaned. Then something very like a twinkle ; gleamed in the old man's eyes, and : he muttered tremulously: "I'll do it, b ! I will, I'll kick over the traces this a once." fi | If the "wimmenfollcs" had worried o i over him before they were in agony d j about him now. His peculiar desire p | for fresh water gives place to many ; new but equally startling vagaries, w I It is a usual thing now when they sit tl down to an unusually good dinner n and the old man has prepared the y meat and vegetables for eating to sud- ii denly push hack his plate, declaring a that he feels "porely" and cannot eat p unless he carries his dinner out of a doors. "Seems like the smell of the a roses and sich makes things more tasty," be murmurs. "Why, sure, father, dear." says ; Arvylla the llrst lime this happens. "We'll set the table out under the a apple tree to-morrow ic you can eat belter there." Tier father shakes his h head, ' I want to eat alone," he says, shortly. So they watch him nearly every a , day as ho potters toward the barn b HUHIIIII IIIIBMII I with hi^ plate. "And lie don't even ake a fork.'' sobs Ma. "He musl | at with his jack knife." As fall draws near the old man rows frailer and thinner, and one lorning does not get up as usual, ut lies so still that Ma. with a great Stch at her heart, thinks he must be j ead. But he is only ill, so ill that or days and weeks he lies as one Iready beyond the borderland. The evoted nursing of the "wimmenjlks" wins in the end. however, and ne clear, crisp day in November, Pa pens his eyes and knows them, j [nows that Ma is holding his hand ast as tenderly as she did so long go when they were first wedded; nows that it is Arvylla who drops le soft kiss on his forehead. Even s the peace of it all soothes him a ild fear and horror seizes him. ^ potty! Just at that moment some- ; ling wriggles at the foot of the bed . tid Pa glances down?there curled ; , p. fatter, saucier, more irresistible j . lan eveY, on Ma's best white coun- i ?rpane lies Spotty, and as though e understands, he opens his eyes j; ad with a little yelp of joy wriggles ^ p to Pa and snuggles against him. "Ma," quavers Pa, "I hadn't ought > a done it." "You keep still," sobs Ma, one ind holding fast to Pa's poor bony ae, the other patting Spotty's sleek ick. a "You jist keep still. Oh, Par to 1 * link of your starvin' of yourself and , i; makin' of yourself sick, jist because ' 1 didn't want to be bothered by a , t Dg. Oh, Pa, you was out of your c *ad that first day. and you talked so j f range. We never knew how lone- 't ime you was without the critters i I jfore and that you wanted a dog so. t hat very day I went out to the barn I id found this rascal and I brought s im in, and he has lived on the fat of h le land ever since. Oh Pa," and t a's head fell down on the bed in an j 1 joiiy of repentance, and Spotty, : S riggling his soft little body over in s most insinuating way, gave Ma's lining gray head a few loving little :ks.?Boston Post. t I 0 Equal to the Emergency. j By TOM P. MORGAN. 1 "Mawnin', sah!" saluted a ram- e tackle looking negro, addressing the 1 .shier of a certain small town bank. 3 Hawnin'?dat is, sah, if yo' isn't too f lsy. An' does yo' need a nigger aund de place yuh?nigger wid a 1 e-commend, sah; 'dustrious, hon'>le cullud man?to wash winders ^ i* po'tah 'round. Uh-kaze, if so, 1 3 de pusson, sah, an' dis yuh docky- ^ unt am de obsequies dat Cuhnel rhite done writ 'bout muh. 'chieveunt3." "Ah-h'm!" commented the banker, i he scanned the proffered paper. So your name is Hilsondigger?" "Yassah; dat's muh 'dantiflcation." "And the Colonel writes here?" "He sho' does, sah!" ? "He says? .Look here! Can you n ad?" fl "Who, me? Nussah. Dat is to say, v kain't read writin'." B XI 1-1. 1 TTf.1l iL. i [iiougQi not. wen, lue vuiuuei i ^ ys: 'The bearer hereof, Gabe Hil- I j indigger, is personaly known to ^ e~" b "Desso, sah! Aw, de Cuhnel E lows me;" i "?as a liar and a thief, and too j ;terly worthless to set a good dog ^ i.' Well?ha! ha!?it appears that ie Colonel does know you. Ha! ha! i!" "Well-uh, well-uh?now, now?if j, it ain't s'prisin'! But?uck!?dat's j ? way I likes to heah a white pus- c m laugh, sah; I sho' does! Takes vay dier troubles, sah?makes 'em :hgit <iier tribbylations. Dat's muh t ihmission in dis world, makin' de hite folks happy. Kain't be much :n in dis yuh bank-bidness?dess'uh linkin' de money an'' uh-shavin' off ^ i ten puh-cent. An' den, when yo's 1 wo' uot, sah, I comes 'long, an' )' has a big laugh dat makes yo' j iel fine all day; de^s as fine as a am er peach an' honey done make t >' feel. Don't yo' reegin. sah. dat ? )' could spar' 'bout haffer-dollah for I ' 5' good joke yo" has on me, an'? 'anky, sah; t'anky! Gwine on muh | ay uh-'joicin', sah! Gwine now!" ' -From Puck. a 5 Use of Magnets in Flour Mills. B Explosions are often caused in flour 2 ills and breweries by nails or other j on particles that find their way in 1 le grain and which when they strike t le steel rolls of the mills produce >arks and ignite the finely pulverized j laterial about them. I Recently a large malting concern lat had been troubled by many such cplosions installed a set of electroiagnets over which the grain is . assed before heing prepared for ^ lipment to the breweries. All iron ? articles in the grain are picked up V the magnets and 800 to 1000 bushs of grain are cleaned an hour. J fhen the magnets have collected a I 'c .rge amount of metal they are swung ; ) one side, degenerized and swept ean of any particles adhering to lem by residual magnetism. Since , le installation of these magnets J lere have been no explosions in the j tills.?Scientific American. t Fireworks to Protect Crcps. j The great grain fields of the Sr.nd- | t orn ranch in Shasta County, Cal.. e re ingeniously protected at night t om the vast flocks of wild geese and i ther aquatic fowl that do immense < amage to crops, by means of a dis- 1 lay of fireworks. < Skyrockets and Roman cmdles < ?"?HsMinrVif in nno'ifi'h qc hv t tic UUUjjUl IU 11*1 4UU 4VIV-VWI KfJ :ie management of the ranch, and ? len are stationed at various points. ? Whenever a flock is heard honking c 1 the distance several skyrockets or i shower of colored balls from a ] Loruan candle are sent upward, and 1 s a result the birds give the ranch wide berth.?Popular Mechanics. 1 < Casey at the Jet. ^ "What's this I hear about Casey?" ( sked McGinnis. , '"He's been trying to asphyxiate ( imself," said O'Reilly. ( "G'wan! What did he do?" ^ "He l:'t every gas jet iji the house ] nd sat down and waited."?Every- , ody's. r ' Mrs. Choate Resigned. Mrs. William G. Choate resigned as )resident of the Woman's Exchange it the last annual meeting. The ex:hange was founded by Mrs. Choate hirty-two years ago and she had erved as president ever since. Since ts foundation it has paid more than 51,500,000 to consignees. During he year just closed its sales amountid to $78,000, of which $68,588 was >aid to consignees. Mrs. W. V. Lawence was elected to succeed Mrs. Choate, and Mrs. Catherine Lambert ucceeaed. Mrs. JuawreHce as viceiresident.?New York Sun. I Suffrage Settlements. Professor Frances Squire Potter ;nd Professor Mary Gray Peck are to ie at the head of the work of organzing suffrage settlements throughout he country. The settlements are to ie under the auspices If not the actual ontrol of the National Woman's Sufrage Association. The idea is said o have originated with Mrs. O. H. P. Jelmont, who at her own expense esablished two in New York, one in larlem and the other on Henry treet. Baltimore, Chicago and Spo:ane caught the idea at once and setlements have already been estabished in all three cities.?New York lun. Diamonds May Be Engraved. A Parisian inventor has devised 00I3 for the engraving of the surface f diamonds, and thus has opened up new field in jewelry. Wonderfully teautiful efTects can be produced, 'he new instrument enables a skilled ngraver to portray flowers with all heir foliage on a diamond, and deigns of various kinds. It has enabled diamond cutter to cut a diamond ato the form of a ring, polished on he inside, and cover tho upper sur* ace with artistic designs. Another iamond has been carved like a flsh. 'he design of a bicycle has been en3 ( Scrambled Eggs on IV! ^ N.I ?PltfA Ortrfl m KloH O O Cy ? ^ iittnu?i itc ow c*ua v.c 2f > 8 delicious dish; then, agai ? & i 1 eggs -with one-fourth of t ~ ~ 2 \ this event it is well to ha ? ? & put the dish ihto a hot 0 s ) finish cooking the eggs. rCD t_n r^rcn-rx raved on another diamond. Though t formerly was possible to polish only [at surfaces of diamonds, French workers have perfected a method for lolishing concave parts. They have ools that produce straight or curved Ines. It also now is possible to pierce toles in diamonds and still retain the irilliancy. Accordingly, diamonds tow may be placed on a string. The nventor spent many years in perfectng his^ools for doing such work.? Jew York Press. What Clssie Did. The attractive young women who lad been selected to take the offerngs in the progressive Chicago hurch were about to start up the .isles. Suddenly the fair young captain of ho squad held up her hand. "Edith," she whispered, "you will hange places with Cissie Pinkiey." "But I like the second aisle much letter," pouted Edith. "Hush," murmured the captain. "I vill explain later. All ready, larch!" When they came back it was found hat Cissie Pinkley's plate showed rery much the best yield. The slender captain smiled. "This is all due to a profound know!idge of masculine nature," she ex>lained. "When I counted up the ludience I noticed seventeen dark roung men sitting along the second j_i- a >-niTiotto fUssie is tlSie. CjUlLll IS a bt LtUv.-.v. i flaxen Paired blonde. The dark roung men wouldn't be impressed by Ddith, but you see what Cissie did to hem." And she smiled complacently as she idded up the totals.?Cleveland Plain Dealer. The Age of Woman. Professor Arthur Keith, of the iloyal College of Surgeons, deserves o be congratulated; he has correctly iscertained the age of a woman who efused to disclose it. It is not very jallant of him to declare taat she is >00,000 years old, but he is willing to itake his scientific reputation on the iccuracy of his assertion. The British savant has unearthed a irehistoric skull at Gibraltar, and he irgues from the size and strength of ;he jaw that it is a skull of the femnine gender. The brain cavity is unjsually large, from which it is fur,her inferred that the lady was strong ninded?a cave-dwelling precursor of ;he type known to-day as the militant luffragette. Professor Keith says that ;he men who were the contemporaries o: the prehistoric woman had comparatively short legs and very ong arms. This would seem to indi:ate that they could not run very fast )r very far to escape the voluble ;ongue of the large-brained and itrong-jawed helpmeet. The long knwovor xvnuld enable them to U LUO, uu T? V W. , lo very well at the washtub or the roning hoard under the lynx-eyed supervision of the real head of the lousehold. Thus it is seen that the "emancipated" woman is. after all, a type not ;o strange and new as was supposed. 3hc has existed, it would seem, for 3000 centuries. While the last pter)dactyls and ichthyosaum were still oaming at large and eating the tops )f the tallest trees without having to :limb them, the prehistoric lady and aer long tresses were abroad in the land that had lately emerged from ancler glacial ice or out of the bosom f the deep. Cries of "Votes for women," in the uncouth prehistoric language, resounded from crag to crag, like thunder in the Alps. The old woman -that Professor Keith has discovered and the new woman that has discovered herself are sisters across the centuries. ? Philadelphia Ledger. Don't Marry the >inn? Who is selfish. Who ia a pessimist. Who is a spendthrift. Whose word you cannot rely upon. Who never works unless he has to. Whose highest ambition is to become rich. Who is namby-pamby, weak and effeminate. Who has no sympathy with your ideals and aspirations. Who is always making excuses for not meeting engagements. Who believes that all courting should be done before marriage. Who believes that a woman should have no interests outside her home. Who is unsympathetic, cold and deaf to any demands outside of business. , Who loses his temper and indulges in profanity on the slightest provoca tion. \ Who Is always thinking of himself and expocts everybody else to wait on him. Who regards a gambling debt as a debt of honor and a tailor's bill as a nuisance. Who lets his landlady wait for her rent while he puffs out the money in expensive cigars. Who is so dreamy or impractical as to seriously impair his ability to support a family. Who thinks' that a comfortable home and plenty to eat and wear should satisfy any woman. Who thinks that the woman who gets him for a husband will be lucky beyond ths rest of her sex. Who is secretive and constantly [ilk Toast and Eggs a la Backing's poured over milk toast make a n, for another obange, sprinkle the i cupful of grated mild cheese. In ve the eggs slightly underdone, and vea to quickly melt the cheese and covering up his tracks and on hU guard lest he betray his real self. Who bosses his sisters, and does not think it necessary to show them the same consideration as other girls. Who is always talking about what he will do when "the old man* is dead and he gets controljo! the property. Who lets women hang on to straps in the street cars while he keeps his seat and hides himself behind a newspaper. 1 Who regards his cigars, drinks and other dissipations as necessaries, but who would consider his wife's meagre allowance a luxury. Who would be likely to humiliate his wife by making her beg for every shilling she desires for herself and to tell him what she is going to do with it. Who is domineering and arbitrary and tyrannises over the weak and all who are under him, while he crings before the rich and powerful.?Home Chat. 1 iRGTTY Sl kQJHWGSJBl TO WEAJt4j ^ In millinery, as in dresses, vivid coloring is the rage. The usual madras and cheviots are seen in tailored -waists. The handles of parasols are unique in efTect and very original. An airy fashion is the use of tulle as a trimming for hats or in the hair. Neck ruching of two contrasting colors of maline is one of the novelties. Suede gloves are worn for deep mourning, then glace gloves for the lighter. Perhaps the most conspicuous feature in the latest waists is the use of fViontiiiv iar>o for thp main oortion of the body and sleeves. The ribbon sachet flowers are used for all purposes, for muff, corset oi garter garnitures, and for sachet, skirt and shoulder bows. Among the hand woven rugs arq those made from strips of table oilcloth. They are cool for summer and are in favor for verandas or porchess Kough straws are decidedly smart this season, and, strange as it may seem to the uninitiated, the rougher the straw the costlier the hat may be. Black pipings are in great favor, being used to emphasize important lines of a costume. They serve excellently the desire for a touch of black. The Gibson pleats are used a great deal in children's dresses this season. By means of these pleats the necessary fulness may be admirably adjusted. Turbans made entirely or net, arranged in a aeries of remarkable folds, swirls or loops are now seen. They are decidedly smart, but very vulnerable to dust. More and more vivid are the yoke effects seen in the new skirts as the season advances. Stitching is a favorite mode of finishing the joining of pleats to the yoke. Color in lingerie gowns is sometimes introduced in the design of the lace or embroidery trimming, or again in the girdle or about the collarless neck and sleeve. d Father Goose. I Lloyd-George is a Welchman, : Lloyd-George is a chief; ; Lloyd-George smote the peerage 'And caused it lots of grief. The dukes and lords were angry, , But Lloyd-George didn't care; ; He biffed 'em with his budget < And had some votes to spare. I ?The Commoner. j Break, Break, Break! ' ''Your new maid uses broken *;ng- f i Iish, doesn't sae?" 5 "Mostly broken china."?Cleveland i Plain Dealer. I Wnsh Hjir Mnmlnv. 1 Scott?"It is really a problem when : to change one'3 winter underwear." ] Mott?"Once a week, I should ' say."?Boston Transcript. A Grewsome .Test. She?"They say her husband was ( driven to his grave." , He?"Well,, he couldn't very well , walk."?Boston Transcript. ( For Conservation. J Housewife?"Are you willing to | chop some wood for your dinner?" | Plodding Pete?"Sorry, mum, but 1 I am a Pinchot man."?Boston Tran- , script. Her Instructions. Conductor?"Ticket, please!" - | Fassenger?"Certainly, sir. Hero 15 th? kf>v of mv trunk, which is in the baggage car. In the pocket of , my second best dress is my mileage- f book."?harper's Bazar. t ] Non SequJter. I Innis?"Do I love her? Why, man, ' I can't sleep nights for thinking about J her." Owens?"That's not proof positive. I get the same effect from my tailor's j bills.?Boston Transcript. ' i i Solicitude. 1 j " During our stay In Egypt visited the Pyramids. They are covered | with hieroglyphics." , "Lor'! Wasn't you afraid of getting some on you?"?New York Tele- | gram. I ( 1 Her Flat. Mrs. Noobride?"Yes, dear, l was married last month. I'd like you to call on me and see the pretty flat I have." ( Miss Jellus?"I've seen him, my dear."?The Sacred Heart Review. ! A Lick and a Flick. Mr. Hubb?"The intelligence of( flee manager told me that our new girl was once an actress." Mrs. Hubb?"I believe it. She dusts the furniture exactly as the soubrette does it on the stage."?Boston Transcript. The Bargain Instinct. i Lady (who has been shopping/?> "When does the next train leave foi Oshkosh?" Trainman?"Two-fifty, madam." Lady (absent-mindedly)?"Make it two forty-eight and I'll take it,"? Chicago News. ~ ' 1 Bound to Stand. "We expect to have every track In I the country put out of business," said the reformer. "I suppose you will," answered the New York man. "exceDt the hundred mile course between Washington and ' Warrentown."?Washington Star. i The Hero. "Who's the hero of this drama?" I said the stagei manager at a first re- 't hearsal. "I am," sho'uted a man from an obi scure corner of the theatre. "I'm. i the fellow who is putting up the money for the production."?Washington Star. i A Quicker Way. "I'd like to pay my respects to the king." IIamaa In "l can arrange iur uu ciuuicutc m i about three weeks," explained the American minister. "How long would it take you to get him on the telephone?"?Louisi ville Courier-Journal. Had Yachts of Their Own. McCarthy was boasting of the prominence of his family in bygone ages. "But there were no McCar- ' thys In Noah's Ark," said O'Brien. 1 "No," said McCarthy, "our family 't was very exclusive in those days and had yachts of their own."?From Norman E. Mack's National Monthly. J The Handwriting. "If you look abost you," said the ominous acquaintance, "you will see , tie handwriting on the wall." "The handwriting on the wall doesn't worry me," replied Senator Sorghum, "so long as they don't go rummaging into my private mem- ' nmnrtn "?Washington Star. v. ~ |I How It Happened. ( 1 "How does it happen," said the ' young woman in the library, "that i Lord Byron is the only poet you read?" "Well," replied Mr. Lobrow, "I j i once won a bunch of money on a < 1 horse by that name, and I thought it . was up to me to get acquainted with my mascot."?Washington Star. 1 ; 1 -ki f 70s Buffer from Epilepsy, Fits, Falling Sickness, Spasms, or bare children that do ao, my New Dlfl:overv will relieve them, and all yon are aaked to lo Is to send for a Free Trial 92 Bottle of Dr. May'* Kpll?ptlolde Our* It has cored thousands where everything elM Failed. Guaranteed by May Medical Laboratory Jnder Pore Pood and Brags Act, Jane 80th, 1006 juaranty No. 18971. Please write for Special Pre* (3 Bottle and give AGS and complete addreaa 3fL W. H. MAY, 548 Pearl Strait, New York. Beautiful Complexion * 'retty, fluffy hair. Send 10 cents to cover postage tnd advertising. Two largo samples FREE, with 1 booklet and proposition to make big salary. FREEMAN-BAH. BE ft COMPANY,Croton>n-Hu<Non, New York. ^iThempson'sEyeWater PflTEMTSSSSSPSSS Happiness and Sorrow. In happiness there are far more regions unknown than there are in misfortune. The voice of misfortune Is ever the same; happiness becomes :he more silent as it penetrates Jeeper. He is the happiest man who best understands his happiness; for he is of all men most fully aware :hat It is only the lofty idea, the untiring, courageous, human idea, that separates gladness from sorrow.? Maeterlinck. ROCKEFELLER'S NAME WILL LIVE Harriman's Will Fade From Human Mind, But Oil Magnate's Never. Palo Alto, Cal.?In President David Starr Jordan's address to the graduating class at Stanford University,' th? subject of which was "The Wealt^of Nations," reference was made to me [Ives of E. H. Harriman and other great financiers in drawing the lesson that man's success in life is not measured by what ho does for himself, but rather by what he doee for humanity. "In those' matters in which the permanent wealth of nations is concerned, in the long future of mental and spiritual development, the name of Harriman," said Dr. Jordan, "finds no place. The name of Newcomb in the seme connection will stand in larger letters among those who by life and influence have made this world a Droaaer ana a oeicer one. Continuing, he said: "The name of Rockefeller will not suggest Standard Oil or the association of monopolies. The Rockefeller Institute for Medical Research represents one of the wisest and most far-reaching uses to which any man's money can ever, be put." Humoring Him. "Oh! I forgot to tell you to bring down my scissors, too," said the Bpoiled wife. "They're on the table In the bedroom. Won't you fcet them Eor me?" "See here," complained the indulgent husband. "I'm tired of waiting on you in this way?" "Are you, dear?" Well, just be patient and I'll let you wait on me In some other way."?Catholic Standard and Times. Sixteen fears of Skin Disease. "For sixteen long years I have been suffering with a bad case of skin disease. While a child there broke out a rod artro on thfl IPCS 1nsfc In hflrk of my knees. It waxed from bad to H worse, and r.t last I saw I bad a bad Hj Bkln disease. 1 tried many widely K known doctors In different cities/ but I to no satisfactory result. The plague B bothered me more In warm weather than in winter, and being on my leg I Joints It made it Impossible for me to walk, and I was forced to stay indoors I in the warmest weather. My hopes of recovery were by this time spent, Sleepless nights and restless days H made life an unbearable burden. At 9 last I was advised to try the Cuticura Remedies [Cuticura Soap, Ointment H and Pills], and I did not need more fl than a trial to convince me that I was fl bn the road of success this time. I ffi bought two sets of the Cuticura Rem- H edies and after these were gone I HJ was a different man entirely. I am H now the happiest man that there is at H least one true cure for skin diseases. H Leonard A. Hawtof, U Nostrand Ave., H Brooklyn, N. Y., July 30, and August H 8. 1909." Within less than a year and a half H it is hoped that through Pullman cars H from the United States and Mexico H will enter Guatemala City via the H Pan-American and Guatemala North- ^ em railroads. an DANGER SIGNALS. fl SicV- kidneys give unmistakable stg*^^fl nals Of distress. Too frequent or^H scanty urinary passages, backache, , -. headache and dizzy ?^^T?ihciusiory spells tell ofv dlsor dered kidneys^ Neg- Bfl y'ljtfm lect of these warnings may prove fa- BH 5^ Xfrr?>\ tal. Begin using Hj j Doan's Kidney Pills. They cure sick kid- BH ^Mrs. W. 6. Conway,Bi sMfefoM 117 Railroad St.,H Punxsutawney. Pa.,^M ,'"1 says: "I was in sucb^H poor health 1 could 3carcel~ attend to^H my housework. My back ached as if^H It were being pulled apart, and my^H feet and ankles ware badly swollen.^H The kidney secretions werq in terri-^HJ ble condition. I was extremely ner-^Hj pous and my heart palpitated violent-^H ly. Short use of Doan's Kidney PUla^Hj relieved me and scon my whole sys-^H leva was renovated." M Remember the name?Doan's. Fof^H ;ale by all dealers. 50 cents a box^HH Foster-Milburn Co.. Buffalo, N Y. ^9 eoifB npcnac LuaucLiiuuo, o ajo American Machinist, have been com-^H dieted by which it is possible to pip^^H ail from the Oklahoma wells to Nef^^H Fork Harbor. Oil has been starte<^^B jn the long journey of 1500 mileB^^J rhis is the longest pipeline in th^^B In the number of its minera^Hfl species North Carolina is said to ex^^H ;eed any other State in the Union. A good glove cutter in Paris ca^^H make nearly $100 a week. ??^ M