The Abbeville press and banner. (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, August 04, 1886, Image 2

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UPON THE HILLS. Along their heights on peaks of stona The bird of prey alights; He rears his youug and dwells alone Along the heights; A MA?4i?>nl T*rV?rvo? cai?1 m vifao <CX OCUltUUl n UVJU ovu? iu< <w? The lurid clouds that shriek and groan With frenzy on tempestuous nights, O come! O come! for years hare shown The storm but vainly smites The wulls that create Freedom's throes Along their heights. Upon these walls doth oceaa beat r? ilu cittiiiui iutti oppu But wrecks at length his billowy fleet Upon these walls; Then writhes with pain, and backward falls, And moans within his safe retreat Until again some cyclone calls. O, come from the city's heat, From where decay enthralls, For ruin cannot plant hi3 feet Upon these walls! On crests so high, 'mid rocks and bars There's wealth for all who sigh, No fitful fever scathes and scars On crests so high. The calm and cool and open sky, With all its hosts of changeless stars, Seems spread so very close and nigh! O, come above the do.id that wars Where tranquil stories lie! No stiife from sorrow's lowland jar On crests so high. The spirit fills with joy sublime On these enduring hills; With sheen from heaven's unclouded clime, The spirit tills. The breath like balm of living rills From fountains flow iug through all time Into the suil'ei ing soul instils. O, come from out the rueful grime Which soon corrodes and kills; The hills sing aud their deathless chime The spirit tills. ?liu/us J. Childress. JOHN'S WIFE. So you think my wife is beautiful'" j eaid my friend, John Crown. . Wlivn John asked this question we ! were sitting together co/.ily in the room ne culed "liis den,' uec.iuse, as he said, j he had things in its as du ty, disordered : and unarranged as lie pleasei. However, I th's was a little delusion iu my friend's I mind; I have always had a keener observation of tiifles than John, and as I looked around his cozy study I saw indications that, though Lis papers were j left religiously untouched, and if he laid a book down on its face open it would stay there a month undisturbed, sti 1 a ' feminine hand stole in when the grand lord and master of this confusioa was absent and applied many a deft touch and many u gentle whisk of the duster, 11 o keeping his disorder endurable to him- j 1 Eelf while he fondly imagined that he 1 was keeping it unendurable to every one j1 else. There we sat, I ;ay. before- his 1 cozy, opon fire, for John always would j have a little wood for his den, cost what j: it miiiht, wh. n Joirn a ked me if I. thought his wife bea-.tiful. "Why, no," said I frankly. "But," said John, loking a little surprised, "I saw you look at her at tabie with glanccs I call precious near admiration. mv bov "Why, yes," said I, "that is true, j too." "Then," said .To!in, after a few moments' thoughtful pull at his pipe, "you eay she is not beautiful." "No," said I. "Pa-sable, eh " caid lohn, looking at i me with the kind of ait'stic sarcasm in j his face which 1 remembered his having ! cultivated so successfully in our college j days. "No," said I ng::in, with provoking ; calmness and as much indifference as I j could assume. "He lo,"' cried .lohn. waking up a lit- ! ' tic; "perhaps you'll tell ine now what. he is, if neither b autiful nor payable; | for I don't see anything left but hideou?, ! nd if you say that ?'ll thrw you out of , the window. Now 1 can tell you she is beautuul. ' "Yes," s itl I aga'n, with the most: studied listlesscess. "I believe you."' j "Come, n jw," said .John silting a | little straight r, "drop that drawl you used to think so fine when you were a enior, and speak out. You would se3 ?he is lovely if you conld know her well." "Very likely," said I, "but you know I have not seen her at all." "But," said John, opening his eyes ery wide, "that was my wife at the table. I introduced you." "Exa; tly," said I; "I could see a small bit of her." Now, I must say th -t my friend John Brown was an excc lent fellow and a j very fair scholar in college by dint of prodigious digging, which same splendid application (for, after all, what can the greatest genius do without labor?) had given him an honorable success in business; but he had not a very quick mind, though a very 9afe one. And so when I remarked th it I had *een but a small bit of his wife, he simply stared at me in ilpTifA Aft.pr ?mn-in<r mvsplf with his vacant countenance and wide open eyes, I began to expouud. ''Suppo e, my dear fellow," I said, "that a picture of the Madonna were set before me all ca efully curtained but a iquare inch of the forehead. Now, tell me, will you, you who stood?what number was it in our class? something outrageously high?could I say whether that Madonna were beautiful or not? Now, I have looked at your wife through the square-inch hole of one session at a table; and, if even the complexion of a Diana peeped through that hole, how on earth could I tell what the whole would ffppear viewed by day and night, in parior aud study and kitchen, and at all meals? Don't you see that, a* I said, 1 have seen but a bit of your amiable wife, and can say r.o more than that the square inch of the forehead is well painted "Ah,"said John, settling back, "you are the same old philosopher that you ! used to be when you stood in the class? where was it? Somewhere outrageously low. Well, I tell you,my boy, that was a lucky sprawl for me." "Sprawl?" said I. "Yes," said John, "the tumble which _/ land d me at my wife's feet in more x senses than one. Didn't I ever tell you about it?" said my friend, seeing my 1..1. ; ? n.?i iiumi IUUJv U1 >ui |?11*C miu. i;u. iisaii v. n ru, it isn't much of a story after all, only, you know, it made mo supremely happy, and all that. Why, you remember, I never could stand on my feet if there was a possibility of slipping, and this event wa3 an egregious half-somersault which I performed at a country boarding-house where I was faking vacation. There were two or thiee girls in the house, and some young men, and one day when out for a picnic I went back quite chivalrously for a bucket of milk that had been forgotten, and the others waited lor me at the foot of a little hill. Now, as I came down, my proclivity beinir strongly in unison with the declivity of the hill, what should I do but stnb ftJ loe; P over 1u^e serenely on my ErSv face, and spill the milk most skilfully; and that's the wayl got my wife." "Well," said I, feeling a little inclined to stare in my turn, but concluding not to gratify John by such a simplicity, "that is an odd kind of wooing, certainly; you don't mean to say that's the whole of the storv'j" __ ? .Irj .1. _ A1I "?Tiijr, jea, saiu uuim, at iva^i, ??i I'll tell you. You sec, the point was she didn't laugh. Ail the others mude immensely merry at my expense, confound them, and the girls as badly ns the boys. I thought they would fairly faint with laughter when I got up, red and be-1 scratched in the face and begrecned with grass stains all over my white linen suit. In the midst of my confusion, as I tell you, I had sense enough to note the fact that one girl did not laugh. On the con trary, she had a shade of ipiiet concern on her face, mellowed (for I tell you I I remember the expression, my boy. with J remarkable distinctness) bv intense observation, to assure herself that I was not seriously hurt. Well, row, pe;h ps you will think I fell in love with her on the spot?" with a suspicious glance at me. I nodded. "Well I didn't. I was such an unconscionable cub that I was really madder with hr>r tlmn with tin; rest of tliCtft. Bah, said I to myself. I knew she was j quiet and ^tiil but I thought she might I be waked lip. There is no more humor j in her than in a monkey." Here John paused a loug time, ga/.ing into the fire. j "Go on," said I. "Oh," said John with a little 9tart, I "why?well, there's nothing more to tell; j only the next day when I was wandering j about alone, a little sore in the knees, and still sorer in my mind?the mortification, you know, and those detestible girls giggi ng every time I hove in sight ?why, what should I hear but a little rippling laughter, for all the world like the babbling of a brook over its pepples, a kind of cross between that and the twitter of bird3 when they have just buildcd a nest; and when I came where the sound was there was my wife, you know,?11 mean?well, you know who I mean? laughing over Pickwick. So I was for. ed to conclude that she had more humor than a monkey. After that I fell to observing her, and discovered that the reason she didn't laugh at ir.e was simply because she had too kind a heart. 1 noticed now how she always deftly, covered up little mishaps, and, in short, I found her out?and myself too." "Now,"continued John, after another long gaze at the fire. "I am not going j to teil you of another preposterous fall I | had; it was when?but no matter; what j she snid to me then was: "Stand up, my j clear; it is my duty now to hold you up wheu you slip."?Chicago Herald. Stories of Turtles. J. C. Banks, of Oluey, 111., caught a land turtle in 180,1 and cut his initials on the shell. Recently he found the same turtle in his garden, within a short distance of the place where he saw it twenty-oue years ago. A hotel-keeper at Washington, Ga., says a turtle's head's wj:s cut oif and thrown into the back yard of his hotel. Twenty-four hours later it caught a chicken by the foot and held on until its j iws were forced open by the hotel man. Colonel J. G. Johnson, of Cherry Hill, Md., found aland turtle in 1812 and cut in its shell his initials and the date. In 1848 the turtle was fo :nd byE. D. Clay- j tnn. a neighbor of Colonel Johnson. Mr. Clayton found the turtle again a short time since. It was crawling about the tomb of Colonel Johnson, who died fo:ty years ago. Louis Cronenberg, of Columb'a. S. C., was bitten on the foot by a snapping :urtle. He attempted to foive the turtle's mouth open, whereupon the creature; c.iught him by the finger and bit it badly, i A local paper gravely says: "Fortuuately | it was thundering at th(; time and the j turtle let go his h;ld without further trouble." Two colored men quarreled in a mar-, ket at Raleigh, N. C., and one of them swung a ten-pound mud turtle above his head and tl en brought it down upon the hand of the other man. The 1 low indicted a deep wound :>nd the wie'dei of the turtle was arrested. The court ? :n Will U'JW UC LailCU \i\IUU. LKJ \4VV.iU? whether a turtle is a deadly weapon. Jake Pecker, a Louisville fireman, bought two snapping turtles and start d to carry them home. One of the turtles snapped at a passing negro and grab' ei him by the coat. "While beckcrwas trying to pull the turtle's h ad away the j other turtle g abbed his hand. In the excitement v>liich followed the first turtle seized Becker's free har.d. Neither would let go its hold and Becker ran home with a turtle dangling from each hand. The creatures' h< ads were cut ofl and still their jaws clung, but were finally torn away with great difficulty. Becker's hau.ls were so lacerated that he was la:d off from duty. Riding Elephant Back. We quote as folio vs from Edwin Arnold's '-India Revisit'd:" It is some -.vhit o Id to hear "Hatti taiyar hai?the ele- ! pharu is ready," anno- need as naturally as though it were a cab or carriage which stands waiting at the door. Yet the least J experienced might safe y climb to the mountaino.is back of Bhnirava, one of the guico war's qu'etest and biggest tuskers. Caparisoned in scarlet and yellow, with a.foreheal c'.oth of kincob, which the m:\hout pushes aside whin he desires to prod the mighty bc:ist on the ! occiput with the pointed hook, Bhairava seemed grand aud porderousenonghto be wholly above serving as a sort of colossal omnibus At the word "baitho," however, he meekly folded his hind legs and stretched his front legs forward, lowering his body to the earth, whereupon a ladder of ten steps, set aguin-t his side, enabled us to cl.mb to the silver ho ulali, where a party of four can be com'ortably accommodated. Then Bhairava heaved majestically aloft?a movement which : demands precaution on the part of the j passengers?and rolled forward on a trip ! of circ.imambulation round the city and its sub.irbs. Behind lain ran a hattiwallah, uttering gruffly many a "sum'' and "chutt" to keep the monster going, and ! sometimes emphasizing the ejaculations . with a tremendous b'ow upon th<; <-le- j phant's tailroot from a staff four inches ] thick, which vonld have broken the leg of si horse, but seemed to be regarded by I Hhainr a as the merest and most playful hint to "move on."' Hats of Wooil. By a new proves* of manipulation hats more serviceable and liner than anything i n .w on the market are made of wood j pulp. They are impervious to water and ! not wanting in flexibility. It is claimed lliat felt hats will have to take a back : seat as soon as these new hats can be ! placed in the market in sufficient numbers to supply the demand. They are certain to revolutionize the hatter'B trade, as they can be molded into any j shape or style desired and colored to I meet the taste of the public. They can ' be m;ide to represent a glossy or nappy appearance.?Troy (Times. 1 BUDGET OF FUlT HUMOROUS SKETCHES FROM VARIOUS SOURCES. Congressional Methods?No Mere Passing "Whim?Wasn't Afraid? Hints to Summer Boarders? Categorical Witness. The clock had struck midnight in the residence of a Congressman, and still the young man in the parlor did not go. The young fellow had been away for two weeks, and the girl's father was willing tl at he should have a fair show; but this was too much, and at last he went to the head of the stairs ai:d listened a minute. "Mollie!'' he called sharply. ''Yes, papa," came the silvery voice of his child, with a slightly smothered acccnt. "It is after 12 o'clock." "Yes, papa, and we are doing all we can to expedite the accumulated business. We will adjourn by-and-by, papa." The helpless father, unable to answer the argument, returned to his bed in tea s.?JYcw York S'ar. No Mere Passing Whim. Miss Birdie McGinniss is one of the most confirmed flirts in Austin. She has been engaged to half a dozen men, and thus far has never mained any of them. Of lite, Tom Anjerry, a dissipated student of the l*n:ver.-ity of Texa=>. h;is been paying Miss Birdie marked attention. A few evenings ago, being in a secluded place with her, he flopped down on his kneea and remarked in an agonized tone of voice: "Miss Birdie, I adore you." "I cau't believe you,'' replied Birdie, 'you men are so fickle and unreliable. Your so-called love is a mere passing whim." "Oh, no,"saidTom,"my loveforyouis greater than that of your last four fellows put together."? &'iftings. Wasn't Afraid. Geo ge and Mabel were walking down the avenue, and George was showing her how much he knew. "Yes," he said, "science is constantly making some new discovery. Now there's the tyrotoxicon." "What is that? It must be something horrid." "It is. It's a terrible microbe that gets through your entire system. It is cai ght by eating ice cream," and here George looked straight ahead with an the indiiTeience he had in stock. '"What kind of a disease does it give you?" she inquired, suppressing a shudder. ' I don't know exactly, but I should th'nk it was something like the smallpox, only a great deal wor3e. She didn't speak for two or three minutes. Then she laid her hand on his aim, and said in a low voice: "George." "What is it, dearest?" "I have been vaccinatcd." In George's humble estimation the tyrotoxicon is the biggest failure on record.?Merc) ant- Traveler. Hints to Summer Boarders. City folks who go into the country to board on a farm during a part of the heated terra, will save them elves con siderublc trouble and some remorse by taking these brief end hastily evolved hints at their facc value. Don't expect the earth; you can have only a very small part of it for six dollars per week. D.in't expect a view from your window that takes in a green hillside with browsing limbs, a lake with water-fowl,groves and llowers, and a clear sunset every day during your stay. These things come high, save in advertisements for summer boarders. Look out upon the patient farm-boy bugging the potato-vines and be content. Don't go noar the mowing-machine ;f iQ in innt.inn Yon mav safelv IV sit on the fence surrounding the field in which it is singing its merry song, but that w.ll be near enough. You might go behind a mowing-michine when it is in comp'ete repose,but if it should start, you should start also, and you should not stop until you reach the fence. Don't monkey with the straw-cutter, or try to climb over the barbed-wire fence, just to show the congregation how smart you are. It requires long practice to climb a barbed-wire fence and not be sorry for it afterward. In busy times you may take off your coat and go out with the hands for half- j a-day, just to give yourself an appetite, j That will please the farmer, notwithstanding your increased appetite; but don't get into the habit of tint sort of thing. Evince an interest in live stock, but don't siy you would like to learn to imilk a cow. You might in this way, greatly please the farmer and his wife; but the cow would probably kick you in the stomach, or the finee-corner, at the first motion, and you would have to buy a new milk-pail. Praise the apple dumplings; say the farm is the be t kept you ever saw; kiss the baby and pet the dog; and thus make yourself solid with the whole family at the very outset. If you go walking in the woods and see a large hornets' nest hanging from a j low limb, don't become infatuated with it. If a desire to pull it and taks it j home to show it to the other boarders i jprings up in your bo?om, try to repress | t. Hornet* are a little particular, and j do not like to have their nest shown i around among curious city people while | they are using it, and if you pull their ! nest while they arc at home they will! show their disapprobation of your course, j ?Scott Way, in Puck. A Categorical Witness. "Do you know the prisoner well?" j asked the lawyer. ' Never knew him sick," replied the WilllfSS. "No levity," said the lawyer, sternly.' "Now, sir, did you ever see the prisoner | at the bar?" "Had many a drink with him at the bar." "Answer my question, sir," veiled the ; lawyer. "How long have you known the prisoner:" "From two feet up to five feet ten incae-*.'' "Will the court make the?" HT ? - 1 M :t..Ann "i nave, your uonur, duiu iuu wnuw, ant cipating tlic lawyer; "I have answered the question. I knowed the prisoner when he was a boy two feet long and a man live feet ten?" The lawyer arose, placcd both hands on the table in front of him, spread his legs apart, leaned over the table, and said: ''Will you tell the court what you know about this case?" "That ain't his name." "What aiolhis name?" "Case." "Who said it was?" ' You did. You wanted t:> know what I knew about this Case?his name is Smith." "Your honor," howled the lawyer, plucking his ibeard out by the roots, "will you make this man answer?" ' Witness, you must answer the questions put to you," said the judge. "Land o' Goshen, your honor, hain't I bin doin' it? Let the counsel fire awav, I'm ready." 4 Then," said the lawyer, "don't beat about the bush any more. You and this prisoner have been friends?" "Mover!" "What! Wasn't you summoned here as a fr.'end of his?" "JVo, sir; I was summoned here as a Presbyterian. Neither of us was ever . ?? AhaItak oKmif Kim " I IH L U3 , UU V^uarwi aywuw u.w. "Stand down!" yelled the lawyer, in deep disgust. "Hey*" "Stand down." "Can't do it. I'll sit down or stand up "Usher, remove that man from the box." Witness retires, muttering: "Well, :if he ain't the thick-headulest lawyer I ever laid eyes on!"?Detroit Free Press. A Bulgarian Hercules. In the Bulgarian village of Ostrova, correspondent of the Freie Pressc recently witnessed the explo'ts of a rustic athlete who could m:ike his fortune in any North American circus. He snapped ! an inch tow by passing one loop over his ! neck and shoulders and the other around [ his be.idcd knei?, and then stra'ghtening o.it with an effort that turned his forehead into a clump of wrinkles. With an end of the same tow he then got a hitch around a sixty-pound chunk of limestone, and after giving it a few pendulum swings, whirled it around his head like a slungshot. A boy attendant then handBd him a stone jug of the heaviest * * > J .? : ...1 caiiDer, wmca nu wruppeu up m a tum<i and chucked between his crossed arms and his chest. "Will you pay for it if I brca'c it?" he asked, a'ter giving the I bundle a preliminary hug. Coppers dropped in from all sides, and under the next hug the massive stoneware collapsed like an egg-shell. Samson next seize d a wheelbarrow by the end of the handles. "Who will give me a florin if I let him sit in here and lift this thing the way I I hold it?" No one seeming disposed to volunteer, Samson made his boy get aboard and hold the limestone rock between his knees. Seizing the barrow at the very extremity of the handles, he raised it clean off the ground, held it out at arm's length for at leust fivo seconds, and then lowered it without nllow ing the front end to tip a single inch. He then produced a l irge grain sack and offered to bag any fellowman in less than ten minutes for a bet of live again>t two florins. A broad-shouldered raftsman accepted the challenge on condition that the matador should refrain from usin<$ his fists. A ring was formed, and the raft man proved a to igh customer, but in spite of all his kicking and bracing the c :ampion finally go! a lock-grip around his arms, and in the next moment ensacked his person from h; ad to heels, amidst the thundering plaud ts of the rustic spectators. The Coachman's Bride. Referring to the daughter of Morosiui, the rich banker, whose marriage to her father's coachman created such a huge sensa tion in New York social circle.', a Xew York correspondent of the Boston Hera^l writes: I hear that the somewhat celebrated love match between Victoria Schelling and her stable husband is not quite as rosy as it was. Indeed, they do say that the wedded life of the coachman and his bride is rather more spirited than affectionate. Mm. Schelling looks thin and anxious. She wa? plump and rath r light-heurled when hir runnwaj marriage occurred. Now the girls at the Casino are telling that she cries in her clressing-roo.Ti between the scenei on the stntje, and thr re arc rumors that she is badly treated at home Her father, ] understand, would take her back to his home if she would get away from hei husbind; but she is not quite ready tc do that. She is, however, beginning tc | think that she male a great mistake in life and to feel her humiliation verj keenly. But she is too full of pluck tc acknowledge her error publicly, so shf grows pale and thin and goes away by l herself to weep. She now gets sixtj J dollars a week at the Casino, and th< people in the company like Her ana nave sympathy for her :ipp:?rent distress. Sh< will never be very much of an actress, but she sing9 well enough and look? well enough to be sure of earning a good living on the stage as long as she maj choose to stay there. Protection Against Bees. J ~r Trrnrl, JLIIU Utilizer Ulkw'Ul^btllg ?.w nwm among bees without some kind of fact covering has recently heen exemplified in the case of an Indiana famer, who lost his life from his temerity. The farmer had a large num'.er of colonies oi | bees, and one day recently a swarm came I out which seemed of a somewhat cross j disposition. There was considerable trouble in hiving them, and while doing this the man was stung twice on the side of the nose. He complained at once ol the unusually severe pain, a id his wife, who was assisting him, hastened to the house for medicine. When she returned, which wns less than five minutes, she found her husband lying dead upon the ground,having evidently expired in great agony. The opinion of the phys'ciana was ;:hat the c ause of death was paralysis of the heart, iuduced by the severe pain of the stincs. There are manv bee-keep era who boa^t that they are able to do all the work of the apiary with no protection to the face, and while it may be a little unpleasant in very warm weather to put on a veil, still, when the risks that are run are taken into consideration, it is just as well to be a little less bold and take precautions which may possibly be the means of saving life, as would have been the case iu the instance cited.?Chicago Times. How to Grease an Axle. A paper devoted to the coach making indus'ry tells how to grcaso an axle: A well made wheel will endure constant wear from ten to twenty-five years, il care is taken to use the right kind and amount of grease; but if this matter is not attended to, it will be used up in live or six year-). Lard should never be used on a wagon, for it will penetrate! the hub, and work its way out around t lie tenons ot the spi.Kts, tnus spoiunij the wheel. Tallow is the best lubricator j for wooden axle trees, and castor oil for | iron hubs, but many of the patent axle | grcacs arc also excellent, and have the merit of being cheaper and more convenient to handle. Just grease enough should be applied to the spindle of a wagon to give it a slight coating. This ! is i e'.ter than more, for the surplus put on will work cut at the ends, and be forced by th-j shoulder bands and nut w;.shcr into the hub arnuud the outside of the boxes. 'J o oil an iron axle-tree first wipe the indie clean with a cloth wet with sp--:rs of turpentine, and then J apply a f w drops of castor oil near the i shoulder ind end. One teaspoonful is | sufficient ;'or the whole. i WEATHER REPORTS. a HOW OBSERVATIONS ARE MADE ^ AT A SIGNAL STATION. C c Gathering Facts as a Basis for "Old j Probabilities"?Watching the t Weather and Issuing the Bulletins. j t The tall tower on top of the Equitable f building, where the agents of the Signal * | Service Bureau used to collect samples of <2 weather, has been torn away to make E room for one much taller, which U part d of the plan for remodeling the build- f ing. Temporarily the signal oifce has t. been removed to another tower, perhaps ^ not quite so tall, yet high enough to en- 1 able a keen observer to note any weather a that may happen around it, on thrj south- d east corner of that same editice. It will * be hoisted two or three stories h'gher * I over the front, after a while, and lrom v that elevation the weathcrwiae young c men who perch up there expect to peep s over the eaye of the world on fair days, s This signal station began to supcrin- 1 tend the weather on November 6, 1870, 8 and has had a sharp eye continuously t upon the doings of the "Prince of the ^ Power of the Air" ever since. Sergeant i H. J. Pernod is in charge of both this station and the Marine Agency, at the f Maritime Exchange, but occupies h:mself most of the timu at the latter place, ? leaving Sergeant E. B. Dunn to rule the ' roost on the Equitable building. The 0 assistants are Sergeants Francis Long a i (late of the Greely expedition) and G. A. F Warren, and Messrs. G. A. Loveland, R. ? E. Hinman, and L. F. Pas ailnigue. The fj work done at the Marine Agency consists " mainly in comparing ship*' barometers and receiving and forwarding to Wash- " I ington observations taken at sei by ship- a masters, 'mat wmcn ians to ine snare v of the signal station men is much closer 8 to the popular interest, for this is one of a the principal points in the great system a by which the public daily gets authorita- * tive official information as to the sort of ^ ! weather it is going to have, provided D it doesn't have some other kind. ? The hours of duty are divided into ? eight hours each, but as there are four ^ men two are on together in the middle of u the day. Seven observations a day are c taken and recorded, and three of these 1 are reported to headquarters at Washington. The hours for observations are at 3, 7, and 11 a. m., and 3, 7, 10, and 11 p. m. Those taken at 7 a. m. and 3 and c lip. m. are the ones telegraphed on to j( Washington to be used with others from r all parts of the country in making up the newspaper reports of weather probabili- t tie9. This explanation will, it is to be hoped, be deemed a sufficient refutation -y of the story that General W. B. Hazen, Ciranol n (4^*r*or? rrnaaooa "f At* fVlftQO V I V illUl UAqUUI VUtVblj guvoovu AV4 wuwwv 2' ' reports by the feel of his corns, shrewd ^ observations on the habits of pigs, the j breastbones of geese, aud other occult j, sources of information. f Taking the observations includes taking the re:ordo of the automatic self-registering barometer and anemometer, ^ reading the thermometers and noting the t direction of the winds, ihe look of the q clouds, the state of the weather, and the rainfall, if any. Another and inde- a pendent obser.ation is made at 2 p. m. v each day by Sergeant Long on the temperature aud depth of ihe North River, ^ for which he goes down to Pier 13, at j. the lr>ot of Cedar street. Telegraphic circuits bring to this t station every morning duplicates of all ^ the reports made from the 100 or more other station-; to Washington. These all | : come in cipher, which ujs to be trans-! i intprj a momifirr rlisnateh. for instance. ! r I that reads: "Mocking?Finely?(Sandy | i j ? Habit ? 111 ? Pintail ? Vice," means I j ''Barometer reading 20.94; temperature j | of exposed thermometer, 65 ? ; tempera- j D 1 ture of dew point, 45 ? ; north wind and i g | clear sky; velocity of the wind,six miles 1 q per hours; three-tenths of the cloud ! a I stratus moving from the southwest; j( ' lowest temperature since last reading, 61?." I From these reports bulletins are made t( out and given to the public. While one j ^ man reads aloud his translation of the cipher dispatches, another puts upon a semi-skeleton map of the United States the reported figures indicating barometrical pressure and temperature at the re- D spective stations whence the reports y come. Then blue and red lines aie drawn on tho map, enclosing irregular sections 0 of it, so as to mark o.it by the blue lines t and figures where the temperature is high- e est and where it is lowest, and by the red F lines and figures the areas in which the { knmmofri/v,i nrpcsnr.'s are highest and S I o lowest. Finally the map is adorned with I many little arrows, showing, by the way d j they point, the various dirictions in o ' which the wind has blown at the hour of ' making the report, in different parts of T | the country. That completes the map, s ( and it is then ready for duplication and j sending abroad for exposure in public ' places, where it can rattle citizens who s try to understand it. The red marks B and the arrows enable one to observe c that when a storm centre is established 11 | anywhere?a; shown by the lowest baro- a ] metrical pressure?the winds ru->h in v j from all directions to that common a i centre to help the trouble along, just as a S I man's creditors concentjatu on him at his f period of greatest financial stress. c ' ? ? ? * I It will oe seen irora ima u^njuivu the work done he :e tha". it results simply ? in the statement of ascertained facts con- a cerning ai-tual conditions of weather all c ovsr the country. The proud prerogative v of prognostication is monopolized at ^ Washington, and a c >nscientious signal { | officer here, or at any other station, would as soon think of lending a dollar to a F total stranger, as of permitting himself. s to say that "it is likely to rain,'' though, 0 j if the rain were actually falling, he would ^ | not hesitate to affirm the fact to anybody. ?New York Sun. A The "Poor Man's Oyster. s< TVin annil tlflPViXit ll?9 llisfc llP/TUn in France. The ''poor man's oyster" is so t, appreciated that Paris alone consumes ?. : sjme forty-nine tons daily, the best kind C( j coming from Grenoble or Burgundy. v 'I he finest specimens are carefully reared in an escargoticrc, or snail park, such as C| the poor Capuchin monks planned in by- n I gone days at Colmar and Weinbach, \ ! when they had no money to buy food, and so cultivated snails. Hut the major- t] j ity are collected by the vine-dr^ssers in jj | thj evening from the stone-heaps where << I the snails have assembled to enjoy the f| I dew. The creatures are then starved in j( J a dark cclhir for two months, and when ^ t they have closed up the aperture of their ll( | slieil are ready for cooking. According f. to the true Burgundy method, they aiv |, I boiled in five or six watois, extracted ^ I from the shell, dressed with frc.?li butter c and garlic, then replaced in the shell, ^ | covered with parsley and bread crumbs, q ana imany simmerou in wane ?mv,? < London Standard. n ?? c The climate of the Island of Ar an, off d the west coast of Scotland, is so mild if that palms and camellias thrive in the s; open air in winter, though the latitude is ^ that of the northern part of Labrador. b Agricultural Implements. Agriculture, like all other of the arti ind sciences, has seen wonderful ad ancc3 witnrn tne iaat century in tne una >f tools. Improved machines and meihanical devices of many kinds have jreatly reduced the farmer's manual abor, and made an immense increase in he power of improving with a given amount of labor. The mowing-michine ias almost supplanted the scythe, and he flail is fast becoming an interesting elic. Yet a? late as 1830, in some parshes of England, the laborers went about lestroying every horse-power threshingnachine they could fina. Little prejuLice now remains against labor-saving arm machinery, and the farmer ifl nougns Deaina ine nines ? n? mows vith a ^ythe or threshes with a flail. Che model farmer now mows, spreads, ,nd rakes his hay with the mower, tedler, and horse-rake and then lifts it from he hay-rack to the barn-loft with a horseork. He plows, in the West, at least, vith a sulky plow, then uses a harrow, ultivator, and pulverizer all in one, and ows his seed with a mechanical seed ower. When manuring time comes n fall or spring, he cau use a manurepreadcr if he wishes. Wheel-hoes save he farmer's back lots of stitches, or a torse-hoe can bo u^ed. One of the devices that are now no ongur thought luxuries is the wind-mill. Lny one who rides through New Engand with his eyes open knows how many f these are in use. Some are utilized or cutting wood, hay and roots, and for ther mech- nicjl purposes, but thsv are ,s one in a hundred to those used for tumping water. Theie is almost no limit o the height which water can be raided iy the wind-mil', and it need not be put Lirectly over the well; in fa::t, it m y.be aany feet away, provided the vertical listancc be not greats Old Probs says, ,nd exper ence prove3, that hereabout he wind blows abou^ one-third the time, o the tank used for storage must hold t'jeast three times as much as the mount required in any one day. Thus /ater can be stored to supply the house, iarn, or fields, and the farmer can be allost independent of rain. The smallest aill put up, with fair winds, will store rom 350 to 400 gallons of water an tour. Such mills as farmers ordinarily isc cost from $125 to $400, and the purhaser can, if he wishes, easily erect hem himself. ?Boston Olobt. The Tramp's Hands. "One of the essential points of sucC39 in my profession," said a dilaplated old tramp who was talking to a eporter from behind the bars of one of he cells in the city jail this morning, ' is to keep the hands in good order, fou don't understand what I mean, eh ? Vhat I mean by keeping the hands in ;ood order is this: Of course, in tramp g from town to town, a man is liable o be arrested for vagrancy at any time. Ic mu&t tell a story of how he has just teen thrown out of work, and is looking or employment, which, as yet, he has lot been able to find. In nine cases out f ten the judge will ask him to show ip his hands, and when he does produce hem, they must be horny and toilworn. "atch on, do you ? ?o you see it is part if my business to keep my hands looking ,s though they belonged to a man who ras accustomed to work 365 day.? in the 'ear. For that purpose I carry with me his sma'l piece of hickery wood, which 3 round and very smooth. About twice . day I take it between my palms and rub hem so that the friction will make them Lard and callous. In that way you see I ?ro luce the 're.il result,' with very little rouble and annoyance. There is a bottle f brown liquid which I occasionally use or staining the back part of my hands a leautiful sun-brown color, and there ou are. "When I show up my hands nd tell the judge that I am a ha:d-workoan, thrown out of employment by the trikes, what can he do but believe me ? ? * ' ' ? -3 ? I? :.:i ne triCK nas save me many a uay in jnu, xd I flatter myself is a strictly original 3ea, though it is spreading rapidly. The irofession, you see, is beginning to ealize that it will never do to show up o a hard-hearted police judge a pair of ender, lily-white hands."?Omaha Bee. , Chocolate. Chocolate is one of the articles of trade lost susceptible of adulteration, since a ery small quantity of the cocoa bean mparts taste and perfume to a mixture f tasteless and not always harmless mater. Unscrupulous manufacturers (and specially is this applicable to the small troducer) introduce into the paste flour, .Tound corn and beans, stale coffee pounds, veal or mutton tallow (to suptly the necessary oily substance) and the Iregs of ground nut< (peanuts) after the iil has been completely extracted. The nttrxm cnKotnnno O fow VPflffl flffn BULCl J ras employed as a fertilizer and occaionally made into rakes as food for dogs, snow profitably converted into chocoate. Add to the above ingredients cocoa hells and ground brick, the latter to ;ive weight, and the component parts of heap chocolate arc given. Chocolate aanufacturers admit, with refreshing xtlessne;s. that adulterated chocolate is ery little used in .France, but is profitbly exported. It is difficult to distinguish good chocolate from fabricated, iom th j appearance of the tablets. Good hocolate possesses the following qualiies: it is oily, possesses a full and undeiable flavor of cocoa, breaks regularly nd smooMi, it is slightly yellowish in o!or, Wi.u cryj-tillinc appearance, and rhen cooked with a little water or milk ecomes only moderately thick. Adulerated chocolate, on the contrary, breaks rregularly, is somewhat gravelly and ioi ous, is whitish in color, thickens eoniderably in couking and gives forih an rdor resembling that of glue. ? Oonfecioners' Journal. i New Navigable River Discovered. The report published by Lieut. Von Jimptsch of the German army, gives ome very interesting details of the joury which he made with Ilerr Wolff, a raveler in the service of the Congo Free tate, and which has resulted in the disovery of a river likely to b:? of material alue to traders with the Congo. The Congo in its co irsc irom rnesouin-1 ast, makes a very wide bend to the orth, and then descends a<;ain to the tlnntic, a very large tract of country L-ing embraced in the curve. Within lis curve is the river ICassai. which icut. Von Ximpt^ch regards as being of even greater importance to commerce ia n the Congo itself." Describing their >umey, he say; th:it a-; far as Lucbu, tlie ,'assai flows through wide plains well lapted for cultivation, pasturage, and msts of palm trees and gutta-percha es. There arc many villages on the anks, and the travelers met with great I ivility in all of them save one, the in- | abitants of which tied at their approach. ?ne tribe, adds Lieut. Von Nimptsch, 'was remarkable for its joviality. The atives accompanied the steamer in their anoes, and when we landed, organized ances and songs in our honor." There i a great deal of ivory all along the ICa9ai, and large pieces of the finest quality rerc readily given in exchange for empty oxes and tins.?Lond n Times. IN TYLER'S TIME. ^ PERIiEY'S REMINISCENCES OF wnTf n PffiPI.P Hospitality at the White Ho*?Marriage of Baron De Bodisco ? Bean Hickman? A Strange Diplomat ????? The following is taken from 1 'Perley'i Reminiscences John Tyler, who was fifty-one years of age when he took possession of theExecutive Mansion, was somewhat above the medium height, and of slender figure, with long limbs and great activity of movement. His thin, auburn hair turned white during his term of office, his nose was largj ana prominent, au eyes were of a bluish-gray, his lips were thin, and his cheeks sunken. His manners were those of the old school of Virginia gentlemen, and he was very courteous to strangers. The cercmonioufl -V . etiquette establishei in the White House by Van Buren vanished, and the President lived precisely a9 he had on hi* plantation, attended by his old family slaves. He invariable invited visitor* with whom he was acquainted, or strangers who were introduced to him, to i, visit the family dining-room and "take something" from a sideboard well garnished with decanters of ardent spirits and wines, with a bowl of juleps in the summer and of egt:-nog in the winter. He thus e pended nearly all of his salary, and used to n gret that it was not larger, that he might entertain his gueets 1 i 1 XT lilUI \J a second-hand co.vt-of-arm8. One day President Tyler joked Mr. Wise about his little one-horse carriage, which the President styled "a candlebox on whe.'ls," to which the representative from the Accomac district retorted by telling Mr. Tyler that he had been riding for a month in a second-hand carriage purchased at the sale of the effects of Air. Paulding, the Secretary of the Navy under Mr. Van Buren, and having the Pauldingscoutof-arms emblazoned on the door panels. The President laughed at the sally, and gave orders at once to have the armorial bearin ;s of the Paaldings painted over. Economy also prompted the purchase of some partly worn suits of li cry at the sale of the effect* of a foreign minister, and these were afterward worn by the colored waiters at state dinners. <4b;:ai;" hickman, as he called himself,piade his appearance at Washington toward the close of the Tyler adminstration. He was of middle sire, with long h:iir, and an inoffensive, cadaverous countenance, it wan his boast that hi was born among the slashes of Hanover County, Va., and he was t) be seen lounging about the hotels, fa-hiona' ly,yet shabbily.dressed, generally wearing soiled white kid gloves and a white cravat. It was considered the proper thing to introduce strangers to Beau, who thereupon unblushiugly demanded his init ation fee, and his impadenca sometimes scoured him a generous sum. He was nhvavs ready to pilot his victims to gambling houses ana other *-- J aI * (jiicsiionuuiu ri'suria, uuu iui o ^juoiwi vi a century he lived on the blackmail thus levied upon strangers. COLONEL BENTON AND HI8 FAMILY. One of the most agreeable homes in Washington was that of Colonel Benton, the veteran Senator from Missouri, whose accomplished and graceful daughters had been thoroughly educated under hia supervision. He was not willing, however, that one of tbem, Miss Jessie, should receive the attentions of a young second lieutenant in the corps of topographical engineers, Mr. Frt-mont, and the young couple, therefore, eloped and were married clandestinely. The Colonel, although tcrr.bly angry at first, ac ceptca tne snuauon, hiiu uis puncnui support.in Congress afterward enabled Mr. Fremont to explore, under the patronage of the general government, the vast central regions beyond the Hocky mountains, and to plant the national flag on Wind River Peak, upward of 13,000 feet above the Gulf of Me xico. BARON DE BODISCO'S WEDDING. A very different wedding was that of the Baron Alexander de Bodi-co, the Russian Minister Plenipotentiary, and Miss Harriet Williams, a daughter of the chief clerk in the oiice of the AdjutantGeneral. The Baron was nearly fifty yearj of age, with dyed hair, whiskers and moustache, and she a blonde schoolgirl of 'sweet sixteen," celebrated for her clear complexion and robust beauty. The ceremony was performed at her father's house on Georgetown Heights, ?nd was a regular May and December affair throughout. There were eight groomsmen^, six of whom were well advanced in life, a?:d as many bridesma'ds, all of them young girls from fourteen to sixteen years of age, wearing longdreises of wh te sat n da'* asKj aonat. u vuo bri'-le^rjora. The question of preceacnce gave the Baron much trouble, as hccojjld not determine whether Mr. Fox, then the British Minister and Bean of the Diplomatic Corps, or Senator Buchanan, who had been Minister to Russia, should be the first groomsman. This important question was settled by haying the groomsmen and bridesmaids stand in couples, four on either side of the bridegroom nnd bride. The ceremony was witnessed at the bride's residence by a distinguished company, and the bridal party then went in carriages to the Russian Legation, where an elegant entertainment awaited them, and where some of the many guests got gloriously drunk in drinking the health ot the happy couple. A STKANOK PIPI.OMAT. Queen Victoria's diplomatic representative at "Waslrngton, the llono-able Henry Stephen Fox, was a son of General Fo.v, of the British army, who fought at the battle of Lexington in ITT.!, and a nephew of the eminent statesman,Charles ,'amci Fox. lie had served in the British ?i^? f*r\rr,o fnr ai-vnpjil roars, and J_/ J p i U LU a I 1 Vy Wij/g WW . ..... J 7 was t! oroughlv acquainted with his duties, b it he held the least possible intercourse with the Departme it of State and jarely onto ed a private house. He used to rise about :J o'clock in the afternoon, and take his morning walk on Pennsylvania aven e an hour or two later. Miss Seaton says that a gent'e-nan on one occasion, meeting him at dusk in the Capitol grounds, urged him to return with him to dinner, to which Mr. Fox replied that "he would willingly do so, but his people we e waiting breakfast for him." Cn tho occasion of a funeral of a member of the Diplomatic Corps, turning to the wife of the Spanish Minister, he said: "How very ocld we all look by daylight!" it being the first time he had seen his colleagues except by candlelw.v.* if/i irr.nf fn l>orl at daybreak. after watering his plants, of which ho was passionately fond. Remarkable accuracy is now attained by engineers in cutting tunnels through mountains, working from both ends. Thus at the Muscontecong tunnel, on the Lehigh Valley Railroad, the alignment tested to 0.04 feet or leas than one-half an inch. In this case levels were run 5,000 feet long. j