Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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6 n II <?> Si History Commo slices of bread and feeding it to a dog. Then the dog sneezed, too. Bed rest is prescribed bv modern physicians in the case of many severe colds. Yet try as they will, scientists still haven't discovered a cure for the common cold. If you're an average individual, you can count on having three of the 500 million colds that will affect our population this year. The common cold remains the nation's No. 1 disease and the major cause of both classroom and emplovec absenteeism. What scientists have come up with is a way to relieve as many cold symptoms as - ~so^ The first syllable ever uttei second and third were probably homes were ideal breeding place While modern man takes antihistamine tablets to relieve practically all the symptoms of his cold, our primitive ancestors performed strange songs and wild dances to ward off the evil spirits that they believed were responsible for sickness. This was undoubtedly good exercise?but caveman Ugh still kept on sneezing. In 400 B. C., Hippocrates ? known as "The Father of Medicine" ? noted that bleeding was commonly used as a cold cure. However, his writ1 r\ cTc parrv tV?o rvKcon ro_ tion, "it didn't do any good." One of history's noted cold sufferers was Augustus Caesar. He tried to ward off colds each winter by wearing the equivalent of a thick overcoat, four waistcoats, an underwaistcoat and a stomacher! Powdered Egyptian mummy was a common treatment for colds in the 1500's. Trouble was, the morbid mixture made medieval man sneeze even more. Physicians during the 17th century treated coughs due to colds by having a patient put some of his hair between two ISIS COLUMN] of the n Cold *. o *ed may have been "ugh." The "a-choo": for the earliest cave js for colds. possible and make yourself more comfortable when you're stricken with a cold. They've developed tablets such as Coricidin for symptomatic relief of colds and accompanying aches, pains and fever. But only a few decades ago, people would have scoffed at the simple method of relieving a cold by taking a tablet. Consider, you who are now reaching for the tissue box, how a ? rc ai? ?: _ luiu suiieiei oi me rurieueb described his treatment: "We were rubbed lavishly with hot grease; a stinging plaster made of mustard and white flour was applied; we sat for a half-hour before bedtime with our feet in hot mustard water; then were put to bed surrounded by hot soapstones. In the morning we were damp" ? to say the least! Even the eminent Victorian physician. Sir William Osier, would have said such a method was "all wet." His advice: "Treat a cold with contempt." French Canadians used to treat bad colds by giving the victims mold growing on the top of preserves and jams. And years ago in Russia, a sore throat cure called for wrapping a cloth containing a salted herring around the neck. Many people through the ages have tried to describe the symptoms of their colds, and a leading contender for first prize is Charles Dickens. He wrote, "I am at this moment deaf in the ears, hoarse in the throat, red in the nose, green in the gills, damp in the eyes, twitchy in the joints and fractious in temper from a most intolerant and oppressive cold." Oh, what poor Mr. Dickens would have given for a packet of todays cold tablets! THE CLOTHMAKER I AM THE STRENGTH OF MANKIND Every great movement has succeeded or failed as it has w<jh <ji lubi my appruvai. Armies are set marching to appease my indignation; and the navies of the world are dispersed when I desire peace for a time. I am the high tribunal of humanity, I resolve the problems of people when the courts have failed; and render null the judgments of learned magistrates. The parliaments of the universe seek my views to give them the form of law. I guide the king in his kingdom ? the president in his republic; and the dictators have ruled with an iron hand when I yielded to their will. All have been overthrown ...1 t j 1 wiien 1 uecreeu. I am a constant, immutable force that can be altered or changed only by myself. I am stronger than the strength of the atom, because I can control its use. I AM PUBLIC OPINION. Q. What is meant by a profit squeeze? A. A profit squeeze occurs when high operating costs either eliminate or severely curtail a company's profit margin and it cannot raise the price of its product without pricing itsell out ot the market. Q. What is the heaviest of the operating costs? A. Wages paid to employees represent, by far, the heaviest of the operating expenses?accounting for about 80 per cent of the cost of industrial establishment operation. Q. Are profits important to economic well-being? A. Profits and the hope of profits are among the vital forces of our free enterprise system. When profits are high, as the record shows, we have "good times" and there are plenty of jobs. When profits are low we have recessions and unemployment. Q. Should an employee be concerned about the profitability of the Company for which he works? A. Obviously, since his very job is at stake. The people who have risked their savings to finance the company cannot be expected to continue to pour money into it unless there is a reasonable expectation of profit. Q. Do profits go only to a few? A. On the contrary they are widely distributed. More than 17,000,000 people are shareholders in America's corporations and the dividends they receive are paid out of the profits those corporations earn. Some Coarse . . . Some Fine . "Well, your baby is certainly a Plltp littlf* racial Hnor Via take after his father?" Mother: "Well, yes, in a way. His father is not quite so cute, but more of a rascal." * * * A gentleman was endeavoring, with earnestness, to impress an argument upon a fellow passenger on a train. The unwilling listener appeared rather dull of comprehension. Slightly irritated, he raised his voice and exclaimed, "It's as plain as A B C!" "That may be," quietly replied the other, "but I am D E F!" "I can see that TV has no priority on the wasteland." It was a great occasion, and father looked on with an amused smile while his eldest son, aged 16, had his first shave. After a great deal of lathering the boy picked up his newrazor and began to scrape. Finally, he rinsed the soap from his chin and caressed it with his hand. "That's better." he murmured proudly. His father handed the boy a blade. "You have forgotten to INP thic " ho cair) hlon/tliT ? ?) ?*V UUiVI WIU11U1J . * * A modern mother, finding some difficulty in getting her young son to take a spoonful of castor oil, reminded him, "Now, Wilbur, all you have to do is to keep saying to yourself. 'It tastes good! It tastes good!' and it won't be hard to take at all." Suddenly Wilbur had an inspiration. "Mother," he cried, "I know a better thing to say. I'll say, 'I've already taken it! I've already taken it!' and then I shan't have to take it at all." "Speak clearer?I can't understand you." Lady motorist (to man she has just hit): "It was entirely your own fault. I've been driving a car for ten years, and am thoroughly experienced." "i'? i i LULonaiii, i in iiu uthinner, either, Madam. I've been walking for nigh on to fifty years." OCTOBER. 1964 . . Some with a Different Twist My Neighbors ^ ill "1 just came in for an estimate, Doctor." Why is it? If they do it we call it a political "machine." If we do it, it's a "great organization." Alarm Clock: A mechanism used to scare the daylights into you. wanted to do my part to relieve the crowded school situation but my folks insist 1 come back to school!" Ad in an East Berlin paper: "Will trade my luxurious lakeside villa for a hole in the wall." A fanatic is someone who is highly enthusiastic about something in which you aren't even remotely interested. Sandwich spread is what you get from eating between meals. Many an old hen makes a goose of herself trying to look like a young chicken. Words mean a lot to all of us, and if you doubt the im a. _ r a. i i ? pui lance ui me manner in which they're used, consider: Call her a hen and she's mad; call her a chick and she loves it. Call him a flat-head and he wants to slug you; call him level - headed and he's flattered. Call her a sight and she'll get into a huff; call her a vision and she blooms. ^ ii * a-555^ * > "It's the uncertainty of these times that gets me!"