Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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■(Che ©amecock You got a beef with us? Yeah? You think you can do better? Prove it. Email us at game cockview points@hotmail.c om. Let's see what you've got... Even more tips from The Gamecock staff Okay, 1 know you freshmen must think you’re pretty special getting all ol these free tips from upper classmen in this issue of The Gamecock, but really, don’t think putting our words into action is going to make you any icbb iu bpui from a mile away. You will still look like a deer in the headlights to all upperclass men. You will still be a two-beer queer at keg parties. You will walk around campus with a strut in your walk and a chip on your shoulder, because, hey, you’re in college now. You will hang posters of Jenny McCarthy and John Beh^shi chug ging a bottle of Jack Daniels on your wall. You will blast Limp Bizkit from your open dorm rooms. You will get drunk and do incred ibly stupid things for no reason at all, like, say, lighting firecrackers in the peephole of your buddy’s dorm room and then sprinting back to your room, pretending to be asleep. You will skip lots of classes because: A) You’re too hung over; B) It’s too early; C) It’s Friday; or D) It’s raining. You will have at least one experience mixing all these elements in your next four years. You will have at least one psycho living on your floor. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT make friends with him. He will likely be skilled in the area of martial arts and feel the need to kick random doors for practice. He might have a laige knife and occasionally throw it at random things. You will be harassed for cash by bums in Five Points who say their car has just broken down and they could really use some money for a 40 oz - er, a bus fare. You will spend entirely too much money on things you don’t need, like random 4 a.m. trips to IHOP. Rumor has it that food at the Grand Marketplace is the sixth worst in the nation and that the hamburger patties are made of Grade D meat. Hey, Fve sources on the inside. When you’re eating at the GMP: Stay away from ALL breakfast food except for the blueberry pan cakes. The stir-fry on the Wok line is good, and so are the grilled cheese and tomato sandwitches at the grill and all of the cold subs. The hot line is bad news for every meal, so steer clear. Taco Bell is Taco Bell, Pizza Hut is nasty, Chik-Fil-A gets old fast. Baker Street downstairs gets mixed reviews. Same goes for SubCity. Just make sure you tell the “sandwitch artists” not to for get that bacon on your turkey bacon sub. They are notorious for it. Gibbes Court isn’t much better than the GMP, Bates House has an all-you-can-eat-buffet, The Roost is a buffet too - and the best place to eat on campus, I must say. That’s because it was built for ath letes ... go figure. When you eventually get sick of campus food, there are lots of great places to eat in Five Points, like Yesterdays, Harper’s, Groucho’s, the' Blue Cactus and Adrianna’s and for those of you with fake I.D.’s, the Village Idiot for some pizza and beer. There are a ton of record stores around Columbia. Lucky for you, the closest, Papa Jazz, is also the best. You can also check out The Wherehouse and Disc-Go-Round in Five Points. There’s Manifest on Bush River Road off 1-26, and about five different Sounds Familiars. Make sure you listen to your col lege radio staion (one of the best in the nation right now), 90.5 WUSC-FM Columbia, and read every issue of The Gamecock. And, one more tip. One of the coolest things that all of the upper-classmen do is to go cruis ing up and down Senate Street say ing hello to all of the friendly passers by and going dancing at Rafters in Five Points (heh heh). *> Pete Johnson is a journalism super senior and summer view points editor. He can be reached at gamecockview points ©hot Summer homecoming: toilets, trains, and peace -w-^e bine R h e JSscenes at a major mar k e i internship, Part 3. Nothing sobers up the old ego quite like returning home to Columbia, S.C. After working for four months in the jour nalism and „ „ i: »: „ „ 1 1 power capitol of the free world, Washington, D.C., and allowing myself to be spoiled by illusions of self-importance and grand dreams of the future, the reality of coming home to finish school I and continue work on the student newspaper was something I found about as desirable as scrubbing toilets at a convention center immediately following the world’s largest gathering of Ex Lax enthusiasts. So, I was feeling a bit melan choly when my pal, the press sec retary for New York Congressman Michael Forbes, invited me to the Hill for a going away lunch. For the purposes of this segue paragraph, I will refer to my pal only as Ernest (not because I’m trying to protect his identity, but because his name is Ernest). Ernest ordered us lunch and started chatting rhe up. He told me he loved my work. He said I had a bright future. He said I was going places. He said if I ever needed anything to call. Then he stuck me with the check. But he was right. I was going places. In less than 24 hours I would load up my 11-year-old pickup truck with my belongings and trudge back home. Memories of that day have inspired me to examine a few of the major differences between D.C. and Columbia. Sure, you ,§ay, that’s like contrasting a lamp post with a buffalo. But I have a column to write, and it’s the best idea I have right now. D.C. has the Metro, a bullet fast undeiground train system that hurtles commuters and quasi important types to practically any location in the city. Columbia has tortoise-like freight trains that crawl, coughing and gasping, through the city at -2 mph, like your chain-smoking, 500-pound Uncle Louie lumber ing out of bed after a three-day drunk, never failing to clog traffic at a major city artery during the one time you absolutely have to be somewhere on time. Think ol Columbia as a beating heart and the trains as 44 Double Whoppers and cheese with side orders ol lard. And I think it’s state law that the conductors must take 45 minute naps every hour, giving them just enough time to make it front Huger to Assembly Street before shuddering to another mid afternoon-oh-my-God-I ’ m-going to-get-fired-if-I’m-not-at-work in-15-minutes stop. D.C. has towering monuments and sprawling museums praising and documenting the great lead ers and ideals of democracy that have propelled this nation to its current status as the world’s only superpower. Columbia has that What-A Burger place on Meeting Street. D.C. has a crazy old coot with white, frizzy hair, wearing a fad 1, ing gray baseball cap, who hang: out in front of Starbucks even morning, ranting about how hi blue cat needs a kidney trans plant. Columbia has my 515-year-olc grandmother, crazier than a foot ball bat, who spends all her Socia Security income on magazine subscriptions and thinks she’s or the covers because her name h printed on the address labels. Okay, you’re right. I’m being much too hard on Columbia. Ir fact, I’m being downright mean and other adjectives I can’t use but I’m sure you will when you flood the newspaper with angiy letters. But I digress. The fact is, when I pulled back into Columbia, I felt something I hadn’t felt in a long time: peace. I was home. The aii was clean, the faces friendly. 1 was surrounded by the comfort ol ; familiarity. The leaves on the ' trees lining the Horseshoe had ; never looked greener. The iced tea in The Grand Marketplace had never tasted sweeter. The I shock to my system upon coming home was so smooth and deli cious I didn’t even bother taking a hostage as I waited in line four hours to pay my summer-school bill. On that first day home, I even saw a friend in the Coliseum parking lot. She pulled up beside me, and, with a beaming grin, said the words, "It’s good to have to have you back." I smiled and said that it was good to be back. The only thing that scared me as she pulled away and I sucked in a lung full of that thick summer air was that I meant what I said. I was home, and, God help me, I was glad. -1 John Huiett is a journalism senior and sum mer news editor. He can be reached at game cockviewpoints 2000 Emerging Leader Program Learn: • Leadership Skills • Team-Building • Goal Setting • Appreciation of Diversity Meet new friends and future leaders! Application deadline: September 8, 2000. Volunteer Fair September 6, 10am-2pm Russell House Patio Come and learn about all of the volunteer opportunities offered in the Columbia community... Look for our fall calendar of events around campus to learn more about getting involved. Come to the Campus Activities Center to learn more about these and other opportunities or call us at 7-5780. Dealing with a disability? We can help. Sorry, your roommate is beyond help... College life is tough. College life with a disability is even tougher. That’s why USC offers help to students wj with disabilities through the Office of Disabil- fjt ity Services. We know pU that sometimes all it Cil takes is a little more time ^ on an exam so you can ' finish, or a note-taker to help you have more complete class notes. Whatever your specific need we’re here to give you the support you deserve with the confidentiality you • , want. Then you’ll have more time to deal with that roommate. If you have a disability, find out more about our services by calling 803-777-6742. ® EMPO^^R Disabilities don’t th, omui or dimimty sEnvicts discriminate, too LicosTt cot Ltd AX ny should you. c.oi umbia. sc won University of South Carolina • LeConte Building, Room 106 • (803) 777-4162 • fax (803) 777-6741 ---—- T.- - ----