Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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'Thanks for coming, Mr. Ford. Please close the gate on your way out' frorn THE CHRISTIAN SCIENCE MONITOR Ford's Better Idea President Ford's recent excursion to Helsinki, Finland appears to be nothing more than an exercise in diplomacy presumably designed to give him worldwide attention for next year's presidential election. Even before the trip took place, many of Ford's closest advisors were openly dubious of the trip's value and also skeptical of its aftermath. Apparently their skepticism was well-founded. Not only did the U.S. lose out in establishing any new footholds in Ea stern Europe, it also continued giving Russia an apparent free hand in the affairs of its nearby friends. While Soviet Communist Party Secretary Leonid Brezhnev did say that "6no one should try and dictate to other peoples the manner in which they ought to manage their '.nternal affair," he didn't rule out the possibility of any future Soviet in vasions of Eastern European countries such as the one in Czechoslovakia in 1968i. Along these lines, it's interesting to note that Ford was neither forceful nor overly enthusiastic during his 10-day trip to Europe. And, our Western European allies are probably muttering to them selves over what their future situation will entail. Nevertheless, the trip allowed President Ford to establish himself as a world traveler similar to the molds of former persons in the President's office who have sought election. Consider Nixon, Truman, and Eisenhower, for instance. They each elevated their status by traveling extensively in years prior to their election. We can probably expect more from Ford, too. It is rather unfortunate that an American President must leave the country in this day and age in order to elevate his public position. And to think that nothing less would have been ac copihdha entgnei vnmreis4ig Wht' th ifrne?I a nytheaxae' Fopres eBieter sidea97 ott OPresident ods recnst xcursionee to hiki inlinwand pper tonbedomtig mrbems thanth extravagan thelsr tokraa pla,ny Ford'sm osbes disorsll weoenyin disosofa the trip' vueectd rulso skincalo Kits feormath.-R No nlide U.Saloetout inetash f'an WhleSvinent dommnsots Patr Secrtogray Ledonod ought rodanage Manaer Ctra cufain, haaerdd' rule ottheCoibltyranuur oie n JAinso ANEasterN SAroE con riesuction onnCHoslovaki iON Y19ENA8.L Fod wasGUEite forcefu MnrFoEly nhsisi duiCHAE hRis da rpNDA Ero AMndouWetr EIie OGamecuck Editor BOB BAKER Managing Editor News Editor CARL NAYLOR MARION ELLIOTT Advertising Manager ART FRANK Although the GAMECOCK is a publication of the students of the University of South Carolina, it is not an official publication of the University. The opinions expressed herein do not necessarily represent those of the University, the student body or all the staff members of the GAMECOCK. A Spoof A Real Search For Excellence Satire By MICHAEL HARRIS Hi there, it's time for nonsense and balderdash with Dr. De Struct, Head of Stupid Operations here at U.S.C. Question: Dr. De Struct what do you see as the real purpose of your department? Answer: Constant turmoil. Question: Er, constant turmoil? Would you like to expound on that for our readers? Answer: Certainly, as a staff member, my job is basically to create as much confusion here at USC as possible. Question: And how do you go about that? Answer: By tearing down buildings and rebuilding them, of course! Boy! I really don't know about you students nowadays! Haven't you looked around, son? Can't you see what's going on? We're tearing down and building up faster than you can walk to the Coliseum and back. Why tomorrow you may go to class and your building won't be there! Ha! That really creates con fusion. And, that's the name of the game. Question: Isn't that rather rough on a student's education? Answer: Education! Why, you kids aren't here for an education, three fourths of you are here to socialize and one fourth to play football. Question: Dr., what is your best effort to date? Answer: At this time we have several ties. The closing of the Russell House confuses the movie goers. They never know where the movie will be held next. This also knocks out the game rooms. We also get a lot of confusion with the closing of the side street running next to the Russell House. This really confuses U.T., South, and South Tower traffic. But, all of these are minor when one considers the overall plan of confusion. Question: What plan is that, Doc? Answer: This is the plan where we completely try to switch the campus all around, so that nobody except our department knows what is going on. Question: Does that include faculty? Answer: Especially faculty. They less they know, the more they confuse the students. Question: Dr., what course would you like to see your department take in the future? Answer: What I'd really like to do would be to close Green St. and build a shopping center right in the middle of the road. Question: A shopping center! What would that have to do with going to school? Answer: Nothing, but can't you see the confusion it would cause? Especially, the parking around here! Wow! Question: Doe, just one more question. What is your favorite time of the year? Answer: Registration of course, what else? THE AOVENTUJRES OF THE NOOK| E 00M*ir Y0U LAT ~ ARM1 LIut "'AV O ~ ~ 1 Will Atomic Energy Be The Death Of South Carolina? It has been 30 years since atomic bombs were dropped on two Japanese cities by American warplanes. On August 6, 1945, more than 100,000 persons perished instantly in the fiery holocaust at Hiroshima. Three days later the unsuspecting people of Nagasaki were witness to the mushroom cloud of death that indiscriminately killed more than 200,000 men, women and children, and con tinues to take American and Japanese lives through mysterious and lingering nuclear diseases. Most people agree that nuclear weapons are unfeasible doomsday devices which must never be used. Secretary of Defense Schlesinger, however, does not share our concern that nuclear weapons become a thing of the past. Schlesinger recently has made alarming statements about the possibility of the U.S. striking first with nuclear weapons. Obviously our concern about dangerous, ill-considered usage of nuclear energy is very real. Less dramatic than an atomic bomb. but a potential nuclear threat nonetheless, is the Barn well Nuclear Fuel Plant being built only 60 miles from Columbia. The Barnwell facility is scheduled to be a "nuclear fuel receiving and storage plant," although it does not meet established standards to store spent fuel. Most people are willing to shrug off as fantasy, any thoughts about a nuclear disaster right here in S.C. - content to think that the people running the show know a lot more about it than they do. It ain't necessarily so. This fuel reprocessing plant is the third one of its kind in this country, and 15 times larger than any previous facility. The first, in New York, has been closed as a health hazard. The second plant, in Illinois, has been closed as a technical and financial failure. Even if there is no disaster, the built in dangers of a nuclear plant make its safe operation questionable. The life expectancy of radio-active waste is much longer than the life expectancy of their containers. Federal and State officials.in cluding Gov. Edwards, seem content that they will be out of office and no longer responsible in the event that this deadly Pandora's Box comes open. South Carolinians must not become the victims of short-sighted politicians and self-servingcor porations. Allied General Nuclear Services, the company contracted to operate the plant,is presently at tempting to gain license to begin transporting nuclear waste without a public hearing - even before final approval of the reprocessing facility itself. There are enough unanswered questions to demand a public hearing and a final and complete environmental impact study. The issue of nuclear energy is a very complex one. Those who stand to benefit financiall\ from nuclear development use this complexity as a cloak behind which they operate. We deserve to he ab solutely certain that technology is serving us in a practical and humane manner. Without our careful scrutiny and constant vigilance our grandchildren may inherit at best an uneconomical, unhealthy, unsafe white elephant - at worst, a monster that only the deformed and still suffering survivors of Hiroshima and Nagasaki can bear witness to.BAB ROS.