Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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GLENDA MILLER INTERIM EDITOR JIM FARRELL ART FRANK MGN. ED. AD MANAGER EDITORIALS The ticket farce In the calm of yesterday afternoon, one very upset coed came into the office and told us that the tickets for the Clemson game were all out. This climaxed the farce called the "student ticket pickup" yesterday. We had been told stories all day about how the lines were wrapping around the Coliseum and how the students had to wait for hours to even get in the Coliseum. Being basic disbelievers, we checked out the situation, and, lo and behold, it was true. One of our reporters had to wait three hours in line to get--as usual--a terrible seat. And the ticket he was given was one taken from a time slot following his. He was supposed to get a 9:30 ticket but he got a 12: 30 one. And then the young women. "Unless President Jones shows me his fee receipt, I want his ticket for Saturday night," the coed said. She was supposed to get a ticket at 2:30, but they were all out. Now we have heard complaints and heard complaints, but the situation has now reached a peak. Something should be done. We expect it to be done soon. Federal Trade Comm. better use new powers The Supreme Court has ruled that the Federal Trade Commission has the authority to protect consumers against "unfair" businessmen. To which we say, "About time.'' The decision, or a vote of 7-0, hopefully will allow the agency to get its feet more than wet in the battle to help the consumer. We hope that the agency will be receptive to taking the initative against deceptive businesses and not wait until the consumer goes to it and asks for help. The court's ruling provides a far reaching power to the FTC. Now, they have to only use it. MPLOY)AVT OFFIGM C4ARA,' YO(/rE 6OT 7V S70P FLY/NG- AROUND, SCREMfA /NG 'NA /5 A 1Z7 FOR Sup/R>MAN!' 7FHpe AvraENr AYv .,a8./ University analysi Jennings By CHARLES FELLENBAUM Columnist The Student Senate is usually the focal point for criticism of Student Government, but now the executive branch is getting its turn under the lights. At Wednesday's Senate meeting, the Senate Rules Committee issued the following statement: "After careful consideration of the evidence presented to this committee the Rules Committee has determined that in the case of the Student Body Secretary, Kathy Jennings, the rules set by precedent governing the procedure for priority distribution were in fact violated. The fact of malicious intent is NOT being alleged. This committee stands firm in its conviction that actions of such nature shall not be tolerated." Translated, this means that the Rules Committee of the Senate is convinced that Student Body Secretary Kathy Jennings has misused the registration priority privilege. During priority distribution, Jennings worked for Patty Wall, h anding out the granted priority cards. Wall was in charge of the entire priority distribution process. And in a magnificent break with tradition, it was decided this year that no one in Student Government would get a priority merely because they worked with priorities or was in any way connected with Student Govern ment. Citizen Sanity Chats wil By STAN SEARS Columnist Citizen Sanity was one of a group of students chosen to visit Cheno along with his nation's leader. The visit was a historic event. So was everything else that occurred during the current regime. Cheno was on the other side of Sanity's world. Everything was b ackward from what he considered right. Left was right, black was white, and the only pure color was "plum crazy." To kill was good and to give birth was bad, for over population was a problem. After a minor fracas, Cheno was to sever diplomatic relations with other lands. That had been many years ago. The leader of Sanity's nation decided to visit Cheno to be the first leader of his nation to eat Cheno food in Cheno. There was no other reason. Perhaps to help restore relations between the countries? Highly unlikely. The Chenos persisted in accusing the Sane people of heinous acts of aggression. The Chenos refused to release missionaries and others who were seized in previous wars. And the Chenos continued to execute people in their own land who disagreed with the ruling revolutionaries as being anti revolutionary counter revolutionaries. Nobody knew how many had died. Fearless Leader went to visit these people, trying to bridge a gap. Actually, it appeared he was only kissing feet. It was an election year, so he had to look good for the voters. Already, he had derived S : Nothing During registration, Jennings was noticed registering at a time supposedly earlier than she should have. Registration procedure is that entry cards are saved when the card packets are given out. Priority distribution officials checked the cards. Thr-e cards were found with the origir A name marked out, and three other names entered. Kathy Jennings's name was one, and the changes were initialed by her as a priority worker. David Yarborough, student body treasurer, and Patty Wall, first secretary to Harry Walker, had a private meeting with Jennings. No one is saying what went on in there, but it is all supposed to come out in the future. All three persons issued con fidential statements of their views of the incident. The statements were turned over to the Senate Rules Committee, which issued the above statement after meeting in executive session. There are several major problems that will affect the outcome of this investigation. One is that the only way ANYONE can get a priority card is to go through the proper procedure, demon strating a valid need. Another is that there are no written rules for priority distribution procedures. They supposedly exist but can't be found. Kathy Jennings, reached last night in Greenville, maintains that she has done nothing wrong, "has h Mouse a his opponents of their issues by running his administration by the Galloping Pole, an ancient Pole fortune teller who read palms and futures. The Galloping Pole told Fearless Leader to end the war. So, the war was ended. Crime ran rampant in the streets, little old ladies were not safe. So, war was declared on .crime. The result was federally controlled crime. Licenses were required to commit crimes. Only members of certain ethnic groups could commit specialized crimes. Now every group had its own crime to be responsible for, so everyone was happy. Fearless Leader found out that the Chenos were interested in having him visit their land, so he sent Henry Kissinass to Cheno for a Chenoese dinner. Kissinass enjoyed the meal and recom mended the food. Fearless Leader went to Cheno along with Kissinass, the first family, and as many newsmen as could be taken. When he arrived, Chow Line, an important Chenoese official, greeted him. Chow Line took him to see Mousey Tongue, as he was affectionately known by American GI's of another war. The two great leaders told jokes for many hours, presumably ethnic ones. Af terwards, Chow Line took Fearless Leader for a tour of Cheno. They visited remains of ancient cities and pre-revolutionary palaces. Chow Line arranged for The Leader's wife to see Chenoese children rally 'round the burning flag and cure her o,,t in Chnos to hide nothing to hide," and doesn't want this hushed-up like the Joe Usry fee - card - validating - incident several years ago. She said she has never denied doing anything wrong, and emphasized that she wrote names and initials on the questioned entrance cards in a bright red Flair pen. She also said that there were actually four cards involved, and that the investigation hasn't been very complete because the in vestigators haven't found but three. There's one thing for sure; this is a confusing mess that nobody's going to hear the end of for a while. It is also rather insignificant, and would be most stupid and im mature for anyone to try to say that it is some sort of personal vendetta. Surely a valid point has been raised. General conclusions: i.) If registration wasn't so disgusting, this sort of thing wouldn't happen. 2.) Priorities are generally unfair to everyone anyway. 3.) Student Government is perfo rming an administration function that it shouldn't. 4.) The administration is more than happy to let Student Govern ment do the job. 5.) This is generally symp tomatic of the bureaucratic quagmire that this third-rate in stitution is enveloped in. 6.) God bless Student Govern ment AND the administration. Nobody else will. v Tongue Not knowing what they were saying, she cheered them on and loved it. The press people were shown glorious sights such as ladies having babies and army recruits clobbering each other. Un fortunately Howard Cossell wasn't here to give his account of the childbirth. "And now sports fans, the mother is doing her thing. The doctors are putting out a magnificent effort to bring life. There it is.. .it's coming.. .goo, goo,...it is here! Ladies and gentl eman, the child has been born. Great effort. How was it lady? Glad to hear everything came out okay. That's it from Peking Hospi tal. The first childbirth in living color from behind the iron cur tain." As a member of the student delegation, Sanity was treated extra-special. Mousey Tongue congratulated him for his efforts in the revolution. He reminded the student delegation that none of the wonders of revolution could have been possible without their help. Fearless Leader smiled until he realized what Tongue was saying. Leader asked Tongue to please refrain from such statements. Tongue smiled and added a few more comments in the same vein as those previously expressed. Leader took his wife, Kissinass, and the newsmen back to their own land and declared war on Cheno. The Sane people won a delightful battle with the baby machines of Cheno, saving the day for freedom and democracy over the evil Moseyonnguea and Chow Line.