Editor .Dovid Lynn Freeman EDITORLAL STAFF News Editor ........................Harry Jenkins Associate Editors-Helen Pride Craig, Cole Roberts, Jimmy Brockman. Co-ed Editor..................... Joe Thompson Society Editor................Margaret D. Jones Sports Editor......John Reese, Charlie Sanders Managing Editor....Katherine Armida Jennings For Anybody Who Cares: Our Editoral Policy Well, another semester, another Gamecock, another editorial staff. Just to place ourselves along side our pred ecessors, well opent up with excusej: We don't have the ante-bellum staff; consequently, our news will show the flaws of reporters inex perienced with complexities of campus life so girls will frequently discover themselves newly initiated members of KSK and the Stu dent Union Board will hold its "m1onthly sup per in the recreation hall of the First Baptist Church." Now that we have explained 'that, we won't apologize. Enjoy our little faux pas as best you can. Ii covering all the news sources on the can pus we will overlook some of the big stories. We will expect to get flarebacks from slighted organizatioins. (IHuman nature is naturally dis po-ed to call us discriminating in our news policy.) We will take, the repercussions and explain--to the l)roballe satisfaction of nobody but our own self righteous consience-that we hide our personal ilalices when judging news. One other thing-you probably anticipate.t it: It's part of the inauguration cerelmuony". Although we won't. be opiiiioniatedI in giving a place to news, we shall make up for it by ex crcising our feeliig in the editorial cotuluns. We will explain our editorial 1)olicy now, not lecause its a question that disturbs anvhod\. but it w ill be here for an\" interested .tudents. irofessor'' or orgaizatin f eerence an% time later on. lle (Ic ii' reitaifao oif /ie I "iiires'vit/ (i (1 pa)'riu)tnt int/aon'I(i)e('. We teill g uarid the Cniversitil >cting' it to ('.'coriatio,n ol Ihk'n the wIf,' 1 its .student. tehiih ix >aore impotant rearant our(a spjekingr up. Although. :IS a car on the state goveriineiit ip-tlhe-plane hitory. it 1a; beei swllng to all extremnes in infilulence. its repulltation now aQ !1 lillit i ieVonil aniy scathinlls directed agaiii.t its atimittedt failt,. As for' the Na\-y we . "h!!. :11 coinpi U1n.,i +natke a thln I"t 1k as taikati'e as .fJohloil bet for'e clectiou week. Criiticalwrit inlg oil the Naval prga is prohibited. so we conform. * r. for the orgamlzi onis t haut aire dloriianlt anid clinhg to the ghocet or act ivity, we shall1 criticize. Whien we -ee s(linethinIg miingiiL that ougiht to be t~ here. youl will hieari fr'om uJ . A .lways we "ill expre-s n hat we believe'and Weu shall ui-e edhitoriailifreedomi. It ill b~e em Culinary Coaching For Civilian Freshmen Will Aid Eating Problems * Since thle Nay* -teppled it into lii,Steward'V. Seltves. New~ s.itent- were tive aii: eban ije at Wmlzoe Ihnopitonui Caf eteria. It wa-. *4ofjcs. inadIequate . . . there were simpily tooc m'ainy muths"itl.. For thie unia(cc,niluodated ii uneid the only recourse was t hen to expierimienit with the ciated CoAe&ate Pres Distributor of ROS Imaued CoIlebiate Di6est Carouna Entered S. 0., N Maybe We Are Stepping Out of Line But... 'Education is worthwhile if only for the patience it instills," said some venerable age who should have known what he was talking about. Maybe the spokesman was a university stu dehtt who increased in forbearance (and gears) by edging across the canteen toward the book store for his semester's textbooks. Whoever he was, he would probably evoke a hearty "Amen" from any student who sur vived the sortie with enough strength left to talk. The problem of getting books has improved over the last two semesters, when the difficul ties created by mountainous bookkeeping tor Naval students kept students bookless long after the semtester lwnd begun. Bookkeeping un doibtedly is better; organization for distribu tion is better. Still the waiting multitudes last week resembled unfavorably the lines outside a Colunbia theater on a "first showing'' of a fibu. To cut down delay the bookstore would do well to do two things: (1) Publish mimeo grapllied instructions telling just what hours they are buying used books (that's for the stu dent who waits in line with his used books to findl tiree hours later they aren't having any), and what hours they are selling and distribu ting (that's for the student who. determined to get them early-. eats a canteen breakfast while holding hic coveted first place in line then Iintls lie can't get. his books until he fills out somnte blank nobody mentioned before). 2 "xtend for the time of the buying rush. the booksttores into the canteen using the coun ter to the right of tie store as a distribution an1I r(dllectiont spot for the forms to be filled out by \'-1:'s and posibly as a purchasing area ftr utedl books. We Only Know What We've Heard.. .But That's Plenty! ".int \Vhat's It For ? .ked the puzzled "\Ve-ll." We dra wled extenmively, st allinug fo r thimn. It's juost natu ral . . . sort of; besides . . . w e dunino." 1Iluvinig I roved tiurm'selvye- de flat inglyv mortal tool rliingc our repuitationu of knowing aill. we turned oulir ow n efforts to tIhe pro blemn of find ing ouit theii reason fo r thme loud speaking sys ftiin u' er flhe ent rance of thle WV.TF.. barracks. Our firest inikl in of th le in fernal device came b:tt ite mne niht while we readtied ouriselves for beguiii lt'ment by Morphleoui- ( also for' hiittinug ibe -ack) ii (ourl barra'nck- a block away. StidIdeily thle niighit was split b y a sftentori an s4eit' -aing "Now get. this - -" We waitedl ouri late frinmi whIat ever anigle of thue autmoumphmere it Th'e next dayv. howe veir. was even worse. Th'le "voi.'' hih chaniged to ho'(ogie-wogie of the solhident inautire andl was~ giving tt wildly' at fi ve-thirtyv in fthe miorni ng. N ow wve h ad b eeni broiughit upl righ t - - - alwayi *s we ~ hadl laiuighed at such t hiigs as gremn in s ande all fthat supler'nat ural stuif f, buit we' laid or dloubhts before we' loca:tedl the sound imachiine. Still juist w~hys thme speaker ( which' makes the brio:nleasfinug area of W.T.S. no greater than a chleerleader's miagap)hone in comparison ) nias set, uip to direct its volume across the canm pus1 wals still a mystery'. Wec went inquiring. Sonie told us that it's to call wondlering WT'r back to the fold at night. "We're teachimmg thema to conie in on the beam," they explained. Others have taken the position that this particular training group is naturally extro. verted - - and they simply have to have some means of expression. What's the real purpose of the new loud speaker? Well. -iust like we said, we dlunno! rhe Gamecock Pounded January 80. 1908 dhPIdSfsT National Adv ERT ELLIOTT GONZALES. Pint Editor Colb[a 42O MADISON 4 weekly by the student body of the University of South CHICAGO . sosToN durtng the college year. as .econd-class matter at the postoffice at Columbia, nw. 20. 1N6& U SC CAMPUS DY JULIA BULL "3.." t s the I fffieteli heed ef 7The 1! 1 -U"""rs V B.KS.I*. - She collects mant.h folders --...our doeshT sfoKe o BETTY JAME EV[ERTT Chairma-n or The U.S.C. Red Cross Unit, Pre.sden of AR.G. - Her past honors include Pres. op Coed Assoetion ) YWA cabi7't', S o pb.more' Y "advisar , Pres. OF Fresby7enot Felloship, Member cerU 's$ffiel Comil ,4 o ftCer OF Chi OMe4' FREE-LANCING By HARRY JENKINS * In A Minor Key .lozann1ah1 !. Another senester, another issue, and time for another colunim . . . two o'clock in the mornilng . . . hell of a time to write a colmilmnl1 . . . the office of that. which is "crowing for a greater Carolilla" is eampty; editor Freeman*'s radio is purring "poinciana' . . . proof lies scattered about the floor . . . a cool breeze, harbinger of spring, plays with the papers on the floor . . . I light an old gold and begin .. . * Registration Reveries The ' dehacle of regi-tration is m er. and I. have vet to see the \acuous stare of the u1ppier-1c-_laiIaii who waideis flrom1 building to building. mumlnlblingr: "'ve already had orientation. W1'hy. oh why. should 1 take it again!" Registration has, howeve", had its profoulnid elfct upon columnist Lee Lorick (to your right, reader umline), who be moans the nerve-wracking exigencies demanded at the begin nlng of each semester. 'pon. MY' word. Lee. re-t ca;-y. -ooclb a tiue coies but thrice a \ear. * A Beardmuttering yondergrowaadatfIodil imairzydoat.doyoui? * Journalism Class Quip D)ean S. C. D)ePail.S' lass ini ad~anlcd repoirtinig n as isuw inig great reportinig jobs, wheni M.argaret d1ones remnemblered tile story of a recent train wi~reck, ini which manyw were killed. "O)h." she sa id, '"it was a1 woinderful job of' reportinhg. The reporter wrote about bowv thle Cat holies were handing out last r'ites. and the Methiodi,-ts were handuting. outt dloughnuuts and ('offee ... D)eain DJePass, smiiniig. reuiarked that lhe va;tly prleferredl W~uhi, I think., shows an1 appreciative di,-criminiationi. * Oh! For A Joke Thle r'ever'endl noticed ant umu.sulal1ly large attendance one Suin day morning. For the soul of htiim, lhe could niof understanid it. Try as lhe might, lhe could not underst and. 'That is. until onme of' thle dleacons in formed him n that word had got ten a round that. a trmavelinmg saleNlmanm was goin tug conlfe's that muorninlg. * Canteen Condenza TJhe same old eigalret te smuoke hanging lazily over the lilled booths. 'The same old juuke box blaring forthi somue new tunes, No more "Paiper D)olh." TIhie same 01(d pin-ball mnachinues, with some old, solme new f'aces clusteredI ar'oumnd. There's material for an opera here. We'd choose to give the feminine leads to App)i SpeedI and Willie Muller, too. Quite attractive leads they'd make. * Finale 'Puni my word, I sit here with the morn fast passing, my) brain p)ounding auway on all of its one cylinder, chew~ing my fingernails down to my1 elbows in search of a joke. And, ho! beside me I. find a. joke. Says hei'e, serawled1 on this piece of paper', that grandpa is all of 95 years 01(1 and( has never used glasses. 'Then, says here he always dIrank out of a bottle. Gee whizl1. Business Manager ..... _ . ... .-- - Murray News Stoff Lib Evans, Irving Rion, Virginia Raysor, Vic. t I NATIONAL ADVaItMMI8IS "v -or Barrett, Bobby Williams, Eleanor McCall, ertisingSoice,Inc. J*ke'o. Jeun * Good, Jodie Marshall Juerulgevc,Ic Deaumer, Julia Bull, Ernest Davis, Z shlIshirs RNrinetlai Berlin, John Jennings, Ethel La:or, Hamilt WVE. NEW YORK. N. Y. Simpson, Rita Steinhardt, Lee Lorick, Anne Las Aasesl " SAN IaAnCIeCe Searson, Churok Voloht. Business Staff-Ed Teague, Meta Boykin, 0. D. Salley lII, Jane Nicholson, Bill Hutchinson. Circulation Manager............. ..George Deloy Upon My Word By LEE LORICK * Salutations Here I am a brand new columnist with Pyle, Winchel, Thomp. son, etc. with which to compete. I'll have to admit that my M hands are neither the warmest or the steadiest. Never+heless, in spite of the treachery of my typewriter and the brilliant glare from Mr. Jenkins' column, I shall conciliate my machine, Dioowrednu, and donning my sun-glasses, begin. * Lion or Lamb? It is customary at this time of year to decide whether March came in like a lion or a lamb. In a poll conducted in this vicinity 42 per cent of those interviewed said like a lion and 58 per cent said like a lamb. Varied. proofs were given as to the reliability of each answer. One gentleman swore that on the first of March he went to work for the first time since October without hat or gloves. Another man reported that his family used more coal in the furnace on the first of March than any other day during the winter. One harassed housewife when presented with the question replied "I'm not interested in the lion but did you say you knew where to get some lamb chops?" Well, what's your opinion? * Registration Retorts If1 I don't get in Babcock's class . .. whichever is the least exhausting . .. I dread this day more than . . . dating him again to-1ight . . . Is the Abn-rnal chiass filled? ....Never again . . but what's the exam, like . . . a light, please . . . worst than a movie line. * The Joke of the Week Goon: "What are you pouring whiskey in your Victory garden for?" Moron: "We planted tomatoes, and I want them to grow up stewed." (Readers are invited to submit their favorite jokes. Write in care of this column.) * And 'oats of Navy Blue Ensign: "Do you think you will be busy to-night?" Clief' Petty Officer: "llow about a date this watch?'' V-l'!: "You lucky guI l'am not restricted this week-end. See you at eight.'' * Wanted A fountain pen that never needs lilling. Loniger week-ends. D)uinninger's secret. * Life's Disappointments or Do Black Cats Bring Bad Luck? One' rainyv aft ernioon a wveek beforeC e'xamis a lonie figure of a giril was seen wending her w'ay thlrouigh thle pudles to the south side of F"linn IIall. Oin reachinig thle pOrc'h she founid that her assignment forn the CGamnecoek was to write a f'eatunre on a cr tain black cat that had appleared on t he third floor of the library, 1n spite of the rain and exams, the st ory was handed ini on time. Picking up the paper on Friday, what was her surprise to find that not her name appeared above the article bt the hi-line of one of the editors. Explanation: Someone on the staff made a mistake. * Chanson When comes the Spring, A song I sing, For trees, the sky, New buds I spy, Grass lately green, Daffodils' sheen, Meterol 'gy, Entomol 'gy, The turtle dove, And just plain love. * Defayed Action A nman entered a bar in New Y ork recently and ordered a champagne coektail. When he had finished his drink he was observed by the bar'tendler to bite into his glass and then eat it with relish. Them bartender accustomedj to all kinds of idiosynerasies said nothing. The followinig day the same man enter'ed the lhar and ordlered a champagne cocktail. Hie beganp again to chew up the glass. Finally the hartender could stand it no longer. "If you must eat the glass," he shouted, don't leave ihe astem iti the bet p..art 1" . e.. unetwe