Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page. It is also available as plain text as well as XML.

robably the Weather Caused Troubles Who Can Tell? OH, THEM FLAT TIRES! de-Kick Proves Valuable Friend To Stranded Amateur Puncture Patcher We (I and the Sidekick) wuz stand Pp on the corner of the main drag other day watching traffic perculate and the blithful March winds play; but 6 course we didn't have no particular iterest in either, cause like most any ordinary poor hard-working college oy we had more weighty matters on our mind-like for instance-the topic we (I and the Sidekick) wuz discuss ing at the moment this tail started. Of course I oughtn't to tell these poor hard-working college boys secrets but then I guess I'll hafta so's you can git the gaff of what I am trying to git across. ." Well to be more explanatory we wuz just trying to figure out some contrap tion for the new women's styles. We wuz havin' a little informatory debate. I wuz all for the short and wide, and my sidekick wuz all for the stort and tight until a cute little eye teaser come floating down the street and changed my mind. It wuz like this. I spotted her about a half block down the drag and of course put the sidekick wise to the approaching phenomona. She had on a short, in fact a very, very short dress. livery now and then the little ol' March wind would swell it (the dress I mean) all out and she would almost die out and any more of less causal be a fat cutic but then it would soon observer could see that she wuz a walking ~ advertisement for Sylph Chewing gum or mebbe Lydia E. Pin hams Vegetable Compound. Well as 1 said before the little ol' March wind wuz havin' a grand little time blowin' dust in peoples eyes, and I wantta say right here, she shore (lid have a pretty pair of cute ittle ears in her boyish bob. The sidekick says, "Ain't it hot?" And I says "Shore is. I wonder when the balloons goin' up." With that, she turns sortta casual like and says. "That's a good answer Johnny, take the head of the class." Course I conldn't say anything back to her cause I hadn't ever been' what you might say knocked down to her, and I been told all my life never to take up with strangers what you don't know. Course if I had a wanted to say anything 1 woundn't a had time cause she immediately sweeps off, I mean floats off down the main drag. Well after such rough handlin' we (I and my Sidekick) wuz about ready to haul anchor, or whatever you do to a an chor when you wantta haul it. About the time we started to leave a grcat big Hudson Baby Six purrs up to the curb and stops resting almost on my port side. I turns around cause it wuz the b)alloon frail and I didn't crave any more contact with her. I WUz pullin' my freight when she says sortta sweet like. "P'lease Mister, won't you get this key otut for me." Now bein' a gentleman of the ol' school like I am, I pulled loose from thme sidekick and quickly offered my sistance. I got the key out alright and we started talking and the final upshot wuz, that we decided to go for a little spin. How wuz~ I to know, I ask you, that my life instirance wuzn't paid up. Oirdlinarily, bein' a gentleman .of the o,l' school like I arp I wouldn'ta gone but she had stuch lonesome, appealin', suggestive ways about her that I just couldn'h for the life o me resist taking a little spin. Well I waved a fond farewell to the ie'kick. andl we rode away, but not, I say, to ride again some other day. Cause I'nm of fa wimmen. But that is a head of this tail. We rode all around hbru l.overs Lane rn'everthing, and the refreshing March winds blewed thru "aY eyesbrows and her curly locks and (-erything wuz chicken but the gravy until a rear tire went blooney. Now I w'ouldtn't lie 'bout it I CAN change a ire butt I shore do hatto. Well I wuz doing most of the fixin', skinned knuc St. Patrick's Day Does I Not Cause Notice At University St. Patrick's day came and went this year, as it has for a good many now, without causing much more than a bare flutter in Columbia. True, some few students wore a sham rock leaf in their buttonhole, the man ager of the canteen wore a green necktie and sundry identificatation cards for coat lapele were seen blowing about the campus. But, with probition and the conse queit sobering of the imagination, the old snake-eliminating saint has lost his glory, and St. Patrick's day has become merely a square on the calendar, en closing the figurel. It was not ever thus, however. There was a day when the votaries of Ireland's patron saint paid tribute to his memory by frequent trips between the green portals which guarded the entrance to the bar. Here, they drank to the health ,of the good saint, and, if the votary were somewhat weak, sometimes he saw iei imagination the serpents of which St. Patrick set Ireland free. nothin' but powderin' her nose. Course it wuz a cute nose and oughtta been powdered, but then, I am a very tem permental sortta feller and I shore did need some inspiration for the job. Did ja ever try to change one of them tires without a jack of nothin'? Well take my advice and carry you a bottle of Idine along for your knuckles n'every thing. Well I'd a just about got it fixed when another one of them baby sixes rolls along side and a big bass voice says. "Hello there wifey, got a flat?" Wifey? People you can imagine how I felt. I shore wuz in a fix. Ten miles from the Dorm, if I could git out of it and I shore sunk when it comes to gitting an explanation all handy. I wuz just finishing.up when I heard her tellin' him how I happened along and offered to fix it for her. People she shore did have a good line. She says. "How much do I owe you?" and before I could swallow my adams apple she drops a bill in my hand and is speedin' off down the pike. I looks around and gits a frame of mind to walk back to the Dorm when I see a cloud of dust blowin' up. It wuz my sidekick bearin' down on me in the "Bollweevil" the son of a gun had followed me and had been watch ing us from around the bend I Headquartet University Tex Fountain Pens Note Book Cox Fillers, Etc. Remington Por THE STATE 'STATE NEWSPA Gayden] 1248 Main Street an We carry complete lini pipes, candy ai POCKET B: Try one of our lunches cour We Abbpreciate Can You Do Bear Walk or Elephant Walk Join Gym Class Elevate Old-Fashioned Somer saults By Calling It the "Forward Roll" "Can you do the 'Bear Walk'?", "Is'nt the 'Elephant Walk' perfectly killing?" These questions make one shudder at the trend of the modern dance-but dances? "The 'Eskimo Roli,' is entire ly too complicated," "The 'H'uman Wheel' is too much for me"-dances? No, Oswald, just the poor benighted co-eds commenting on their gym stunts. Miss Smith or Miss Cantey gives the command to form squads and pull out the mats. Straightway the little sop&is ticated airs of the cq-eds take flight and a group of hoydens tumble, roll, jump over the mats. The old-fashioned "somersau't " prac ticed with pride by every very young child abetted by doting parents, is dig nified by the title of "Forward Roll." Variations are added, hints as to proper form and balance are given, and one sees a supple Miss dash toward a mat and without pausing hurl herself over tw.ce and then poise straightly for an instant. The "Bear Walk" and "Elephant Walk" defy interpretation. The gen era; impression is of an uncanny num ber of arms and legs entangled in hope less coifusion. The "Hand Stand" and the "Backward Roll" seem to take the greatest amount of application for perfection. To hold ooe's knees stiff and flip backward into space in the general direction of a mat that is none too soft, takes a backbone filled with more than jelly-and the cafe teria is not equipped with mantel-pieces. In doing the "Hand Stand" the neck is the "danger line." All of the cavorting adds a new inter est ti gym classes and a very sudden consideration of steps-especially those that go upward. Groans and even creakng of joints fib the air as unusued muscles protest against these contortions. But after several days girls discover a new and altogether delightful limber ness. Many see the roughly-paved but enticing road to slimness. It is all very weil to march with sol dier-like lignity and to "Inhale-one, two three, four. Exhale-one, two, three, four;" but for real, honest-to-goodness, back-to-childhood fun, floor work and list of desirable activities. -s For t Books rers -table Typewriters BOOK STORE PER BUILDING Brothers d 1427 Main Street e of cigars, cigarettes id periodicals [LLIARDS at our sanitary lunch ter Your Patronage. PAUL TAILORS i Altering 6963 - Columbia, S. C. -ity Students to RUG STORE RS, STATIONERY for man's Kodak Supplies 3191-Cor. Main and College TION PARLOR ds D POCKET TABLES Columbia, S. C. CLASS PINS pairing artment is well-known country for its efficient ive you the best work ble prices. E & COMPANY rs - Columbia, S. C. TROPHY CUPS OTOR BUS VICE ancaster, Charlotte, Bish Florence, Sumter, Ridge [-lill, Batesburg, Johnston, iton, Laurens, Greenville nes-Inc. Phone 8788 IER'S 0COLLEGE STUflENTS Styles Columbia, S. C. & SONS, INC. s, LINOLEUM .,LOWS Columbia, S. C. OWEN & MERCHANT Repairing an 1117 Washington St. - Phonn Welcome Univer, BURNETT'S D DRUGS, DRINKS, CIGI - Agents Whitman's Candy a.nd Easl One Block from Campus-Phone M. & M. RECREA Billia, EIGHTEEN CAROM AN 1216 Main Street CLASS RINGS Watch Re Our Watch Repairing Dep all over this section of the and accurate work. We g at very reasom P. H. LACHICOTT - Jewele 1424 Main St. COLLEGE MEDALS TRAVEL BY M DAILY SER Columbia, Camden, Kershaw, L opville, Hartsville, Darlington, way, Winnsboro, Chester, Rock Aiken, Augusta, Newberry, Cli Hayes Bus Li 1519 Sumter Street For Stylish Shoes-Go KRAI TEN PER CENT DISCOUNT T The Store of 1536 Main Street R. C. W IL L IAM S FURNITURE, RUG| SHADES, PI] 1638 Main Street Palace Hat Cleaning and Shoe Shining Parlor Nzcx CONsTAN, Prop. Rxpers Dry Cleaninsg Old THaDs Made New 1206 Main St Phone 607.1