The gamecock. (Columbia, S.C.) 1908-2006, April 01, 1923, Page PAGE FOUR, Image 4
TESTIMONIALS
Testimonials in Regard to
Articles Advertised in The
Gamecock
AINything advertised in this paper
is guaraliteed to satisfy the most
exacting connoisseur. The follow
ing letters attest the wonderful re
sults obtained by students who have
u1scd solle of the articles advertised
in The Gaiecock:
''lh Nuxated Iroii Co.
Gjentlemlenl:
Before I heard of your wonder
ful remedy I was thin, pale and
emaciated. I had pains in mny back
and could not sleep at night. After
taking a few drops of your medicine
I began to feel better at once, and
when I had taken a teaspoonful I
felt like a new ian. I danced for
joy and then I began to write poetry.
Ik.ally, if it had not been for your
remedy, I don't think that I ever
should have become a poet. I took
another teaspoonful and was so
thrilled with it that I immediately
signed up for E"nglish 6. The ef
fect was instantaneous-it put roses
in my cheeks and not on them as
is the case with girls. My room
mate, Mr. Legare, was, as an infant,
a nervous, fretful bit of humanity.
When he was teething he cried con
stantly and all remedies failed to
help him. He becale fussier every
(lay, and his feet always got in each
other's way. I lost sleep night
after night and became a nervous
wreck. Finally, after giving up all
hope, I got a bottle of "Mrs. Win
slow's Toothing Sirup" and gave it
to him. It made a wonderful
change in him. Hie became happy
and contented. It brought color to
his cheeks and gave him a good
appetite. lie would smile and smile
and play with his cute little toes for
Tiours at a time. I heartily recoi
mend your remedy to all tired, ner
vous, wornout parents as being a
fine thing for the baby.
Gratefully yours,
Dick Spencer.
'he Independent Corp.
Noo York City.
Gentlemen:
This is to certify that I have tak
en your course in "Personal Charm
-a course for women" and also
your course on "How to Win a
1Htusband." I have found the re
stilts simpTly astonishing. Before I
tojok y(our course I tried everything
-"Odorona," II ind's Vegetable
I loney and Almond Cream, ''Mum,"
Lyd ia l''. IPinkham's Vege'tale
Compulound(. alnd every thing that
"MNIavis"' and "HI oubigant'' put out.
.1 even bou~tght a can of "'Rose
-e"' but it was all in vain--noth
ing '-irs (or b)ottles didl me any
goodl. I -n wrote to the Nestle's
P erm anenit \ - Company and( took
a corwrespond(enlce course m peCrmla
nent wavinig. Thlen I appealed to
the Lux tonie Co. for help. They
senlt nie a h ar of Soap), a (lay cream,jf
a n iglli cream, a morning cream and(
two canis of roses for my cheeks as
well as a 1bottl of Ic b I eaty secrets. I
got a b)ottle of "'Color-back'' from
the I Iygienec Lab)oratories in Chii
eago and a jar of I h :iiino Complex
ion Clavy--it wa s guiaraniteedl to be
h armiless ----and( three tubes of beauty
cIay,. It was guarante'ed to give me
a new skin in forty' minutes-it
did. 1\ly face looked like a mudl
ptdlel. I''or miy eyes I used a hot
tIe of "Vanitinie" to make them
be'aut iftul. I triedl Dr. D)avis' remn
edyv for getting ridl of moles and
theni whenm I got rid of them, I deC
('idedC T had made a mistake and
bought mec three b)eaty spot s to put
ov'er them. T took a correspondence
coturse in voice culture and violin
playing from the Voice Institute in
Squieeduinckville.
Another thing that helped me was
ilig from the Aina Pavolwa Danc
ing Corporation. I began dancing
at once and have continued up to
the present. I first tried a waltz
with the broom to the tune of
"Turkey in the Straw." It was a
perfect success. I learnedl how to
lead fine. Then I tried everything
from the old stove pipe to an old
arny uniform of my brother's,
gradually getting better and better.
Everything was going fine until I
decided that I would make my debut
at Craven liall one evening. Well,
all my theories that I had so care
fully memorized vanished and I was
afraid that I was lost, but just in
time to save me the lights went out.
From then on I was a perfect suc
cess, at least my partner must have
thought so, for he still was claiming
me by physical and adverse pos
session over a long period of time.
But, as I was going on to say, be
fore I took your course, I'd never
been kissed in my life, in fact, I
didin't know how it was done, but
since then, day by day, I'm gradual
ly improving in every way. The
blemishes have gradually left my
skin; my freckles are gone; I have
not a thread of gray hair; the boys
fall for me on every side; I wear
my skirts shorter, have bobbed my
hair and am a perfect picture of
radiant freshness and unconscious
charm. As I was looking in the
mirror the other day I exclaimed
with joy, "I'm simply beautiful."
Thanking you again for the treat
ment and enclosing the last install
ment, I am,
Graphically yours,
Miss Alice Fitch.
Classified Ads
FOR SALE-One two-gallon
charred keg. Has been used con
tinually, but is in perfect condition.
DuBose Boyleston.
FOR SALE-My Cadillac road
ster. As my friends know, I seldom
take it out and it has, therefore,
been used very little. See Purley
Tompkins.
FOR SALE-Oil stock, mining
stock, German marks, Russian ru
bles (1,000,000 for $1.00) and
shares in all sorts of enterprises. A
quick income guaranteed. Apply
Messrs. Collins and Pilgrim.
BOARD-Good table board, four
meals per day ; no extra charge for
your roommates; chicken daily.
(T1he editor has uinfortunately lost
the address.)
BOA RD-\Ve beg to hereby an
niounce that wve wvill shortly open a
first-class tea room in the rear of
the Bats' clubroom. \Ve earnestly
solicit you r patronage. Mlisses Cole
man, Mlackey and Allen.
FO )R SALE-Mly new illustra
tedl booklet on howv to develop the
b odv beaut iful. Results guaranteed.
Lottie Mlay V'arn.
AA .()MIH IES--\Vill some
one who can teach me to drive my
car* please comnltticate with Eliz
abetl C Colemand ?
R E\VA\R ID-' o r in formnatior
leadinig to) the arrest of the partice
who stole the brass lamps off th<
Pecerless auitomiobile on jacks in my~
back y'ard. Dr. WV. L. Burney.
W\VA'NTED-A new~ p)alnm beach
snit at a reasonable price. Min<
won't last another winter. Lamberi
D ePass.
PFRSONAI,-The party whc
grabbed the pot when we thought
Marshal Cantey was coming ir
Wondrnw lnst night in 1mnmn +n m,
and if lie doesn't split up promptly
he needn't expect me to keep his
name a secret. Joe Wheeler.
PERSONAL-The person who
has been impersonating me lately is
warned that the consequences will
I)e on his own head. Bill Legare.
His (X) mark.
Learn to Sing in Five Days
Since opening up our singing in
stitute on the University Campus,
we have taught hundreds of students
to sing beautifully and melodiously
in five hours time. One of our re
cent graduates is Mr. Maurice Mat
teson.
Try Us at Once
We Guarantee to Please
WITTKOVSKY & KARESH
SINGING TVACHERS
Charges M11oderate
One Chocolate Eve.
"Chile, whut you gwine do wid dis
bucket of smut?"
"Dat ain't smut! Das mah face
powder I"
"Ya-a-aa, uh huh ! An' whut you
gwine do wid dis liquid stove-nolish?"
"Dat ain' stove-polish; Das mah toilet
water."
"Den foh whut am dis bucket of tar?"
"Dat ain' tar, chile. Das mah hair
re freshmeiits."
"Well den, foh whut am dis axle grease
right heah ?"
"Shut up yo' face! Das mah face
cream I"
"0 Lawdy ! Den Ah guess dis heah
flour is to paint yo' eyebrows wid ?"
"Naw,taint I Das foh breakfast bis
kits I" -Crimson-White
HANKINS MAKES DEBUT
Smashes Hearts on All Sides
Have you heard the latest ? John
Erskine Hankins has begun his
deadly flirtations with the ladies,
and woe be unto any of our charm
ing bits of ferninine loveliness who
fall within the realm of his activ
ities. Believe me, that boy was
made to smash the hearts of women.
As often said of these fellows who
seem to be quiet and reserved,
"When they get going, they mean
business." This recent event so
shocked me that I would not be sur
prised at anything that might hap
pen. No, lie didn't captivate the en
tire party, "it's all a big joke," and
all one can hear now on the lips of
those we love, is Mr. Hankins. Look
out, boys; unless we give him some
competition we will just be "out
of it."
Speaking of Chemistry Sharks
All we intelligent mfembers of the
student body know that Bob Jones
and Calhoun Thomas are the shin
ing lights in the chemical realms of
the little 01(1 U. S. C. though some
freshmen have jumped to the entire
ly unwarrantedl conclusion that one
Izzardl Josey is the Grand Nonesuch
of "D)oc" Lipscomb's d(omain, but
lo ! in the last few days there is a
nwcontestant for the crown.
Iappears that in the airy lab
oratory', on the thirdl floor, one of
the more advanced and less intelli
gent classes was engaged in the an
alysis of a certain comp)oundl whose
name andl nature are equnally tun
known and uninteresting to ye
scribe. It was a very careful pro
ce'ss and( a very tedlious one, in which
an error of 5 per cent passes for ex
cellenit wvork. The acknowledged
geniuns of the class missed by some
thing like 6 or 7 per~ cent in three
successive trials to the consternation
of self, class and p)rofessor. But
lo ! a new star appears upon the hori
zion in the person of one of the
erstwhile goats. In three trials, this
Southerr
Columbia, S. C.
super-chemist checks 99.9 per cent,
:nce, and on the other two efforts
bats 100 even. "Fine, Mr. Abr-,"
beams Doc (of course we can't call
.ny names, that's so ungenteel).
The peculiar development came
lext day when it was discovered that
the alleged distilled water, instead
>f being neutral, was acid to such a
legree that it was impossible, with
the most perfect work, to obtain an
answer nearer than 96 or 97 per
cent. The successful experimenter,
who did so well in spite of such
terrific handicaps, states that he per
fected his working method by a year
)ratory classes.vbgkqjetaoincmfwyp
spent in Dr. Mercer's physics lab
:lasses.
Of course you're just crazy to
k-now who it is but it wouldn't be
fair to tell you that. One might say,
lowever, that the gentleman in ques
tion lives in Shandon, has the big
.est mouth, feet and appetite on the
:ampus, and wore knickers for
ilbout two weeks to show the incred
alous that he doesn't use stilts but
hat the long expanse between belt
mid shoe top really belongs to him.
Judge Bowen Runs Amuck
Calls on Prof. Rucker While In
toxicated
The entire campus was greatly
shocked several evenings ago to see
C. S. Bowen, one of the most bril
liant students in the law school, de
:idedly under the influence of liquor,
staggering along the paths to the
home of Prof. Elbert M. Rucker.
We say paths advisedly, because to
those of us who observed Judge
Bowen's progress it was apparent
that he was undoubtedly following
more than one path, because he was
never on one alone for any appre
ciable period of time. Arriving at
the foot of those historic stairs,
worn by the majestic and stately
tread of their august owner, Bower
shattered the solemn silences by cry
ing at the top of his strident voice,
"Nap, na-a-a-p, whar you at ?" Jeal
oUs as always of his hours of repose
Prof. Rucker extended his head
from the third floor window, and
inquired in tones of such dulcet
sweetness as to what was wanted,
Florsheim
It doesn 't h
only between
mark dowvn a
Shoes at this
an event wor
-worth takii
at once. \V
styles, all leat
J. L. Mimi
Teacher's
COVERS THE SOUTH
Chattonaga_ Tenn.
that J udge B. should have been
warned, but rather did he gain in
bravado, because his next words
were: "Well, naow, Professawrr,
I jest wanted to know why you did
not agive me an A on Evidence?"
His auditor remarked in tones of
finality that he was not disposed to
discuss the matter, and withdrew,
but Judge Bowen, his sensibilities
wounded, sat on ye olde granite
steps until late into the night, sob
bing as though his heart would
break, and interrupting the expres
sion of his emotions from time to
time to take long draughts from a
two-quart fruit jar, and at last the
potency of the fluid brought sur
cease, and thus composed, Judge
Bowen rested his feet on the fourth
stcp and his head on the first, and
comfortably was wafted into peace
ful sleep, while the fruit jar per
fumed the stilly air.
(Continued from Page One)
men were looking. Wallace did
most of the scoring for the Eds,
while for the Co-eds, Allen's gum
chewing was snappy throughout.
liss Catherine Floyd was put out
of the game for kicking her op
ponent, who was none other than
our Beau Brummell Thorne Spark
man.
Frank Lim Laundry
821 MAIN STREET
Good Work Guaranteed, Prices Very
Reasonable
"Let's Pull a Party,
But where'll we get
the Eats?
Why,
Cohen's
Delicatessen,
Of course, that's the only place
PHONE 5832
1229 Hampton Ave.
Shoe Sale
~~~...........
sppen often
seasons can we
11 FL4ORSH-EIM
lowv price. It's
th wvatching for
ig adlvantage of
e've Riluded all
hers.
1augh & Co.
Agency
Richmond. Va.