3ijg eamgcocik
Pun.ISHED WEEKL.Y BY TiE LITERARY SO
CIETIES OF TilE UNIVERSITY OF SOUTH
CAROLINA. TERDMS: $1.00 A SESSION, PAY
AnLE IN ADVANCE.
"Entered as second-class matter November
20, 1908, at the postoffice at Columbia,
S. C., under the Act of March 3, 1879."
TnE GAMECOCK solicits bumorous sketches,
essays, verses, etc., and will gladly publish
such as is available, when accompanied by
the full name of the author. Unsigned
manuscripts will neither be acknowledged
nor returned.
All checks and money orders should be made
payable to It. F. Simnpson, Business Man
ager.
Busines8 Manager,
It. F. Sumr'soN, '11.
Assistant B?usiness Manager,
1'. S. MCMI.L.AN, Ulmers.
I,ditorial Rooms in linnll Hall.
BOARID OF EDITORS.
HCditor-in-Chief,
H1. G. Oumicern.................Eddy Lake
Associale Ecditor,
D). C. H-IFWAnn.
Athletics Editors,
F. 'W . CAPPF1.3Ara.x.............1 ,uphradian
L. K. HAoon.................Clariosophic
Local Ecditors,
I). C. HEUSTM48.................Clarisoplic
G. V. W ARINo, Jlt............ . 'uphradian
'. M. C. A. Editor,
WV. H-1. JOHNSTON.
Student Body Editor,
P. K. BoWaMAX.
CouMInrA, S. C., INAIicii 25, 1911.
Has anybody here seen our new
bulletin boalrd ?
Those that have not secured their
season ticket should do so at once
the association needs the money.
The regular college season opens
next Friday afternoon. Iet's come
out in force and do sminte good
cheering.
Xe hope the management will see
to it that our scrub team gets sev
eral good trips. It means much to
go out every afternoon and play
consistent ball, and we trust the see
ond team will be given (Iue consid
eration for their efforts in the way
of two or three nice trips.
Have you been approached by the
Freshmen to assist them in the
splendid work they have under
taken ? Ten cents per week by
each man in school will (1 the trick,
and think what it means. The
Freshmen ave doing a good work,
and we are glad to see the interest
they are taking in things pertaining
to our life and duties here.
Stop and thinlk a momen t. A re
not things runnings smoother and(
better this yecar than at any time
(Inring vonur connect ion wvith the
University ? I,4ess polities, hardly
anmy gambling anid d rinkinug, less
rowvdyismi, fewver objectionable
Freshmen, and greatest of all, more
st udying. What is the cause for
this great change? All roads for
goodl lead to linnt I lall.
Th-e offer of fifty dollars to the
stud(ent writing the best alma1( maI(ter,
is still open. It seems possib)le that
in our ranks there is someone cap)a
ble of writing ai fitting hymn. It
is a thing needed badly, and to
some of us the fifty doll1ar prize
looks awfully good. Suppose we
try, each of tus our hnde at it. TI
)ou see the task is impossible after
a fair trial, then keep it to yourself.
Some of us may be poe.ts and don't
know it. It would be a pretty good
paper to hand in in English, and we
suggest that the professors make
each Freshman try his hand at it,
as an exercise in theme writing.
This grand old institution has
been in existence now for over one
hundred years, and with it the pres
ent deplorable system of janitor
service. In a few cases the janitors
themselves seem to have been in ex
istence a much longer tine. Today
much is being done to improve the
Leaching facilities, and in a certain
measure the comfort of the students
in a general way, but th-e dormito
ries themselves are still served in
the same old style by the same old
janitors. It is practically impossi
ble to keep a room habitable w,hen
you have a janitor whose only quali
fications ave his ability to-spill water
all over your floor, remove the ashes
from your grate in such a way as to
deposit them in every nook and
corner of the room, and then, after
the manner of one sweeping the
streets, proceed to bury everything
in a cloud of dust from his artistic
handling of the broom. There is a
little variety as to the particular
quality and (uantity of dust depos
ited upon anyt), onie sp(ot from day to
day, but none is ever lost or re
Moved. They are most careful as to
that, their object being to take the
dust from this table and deposit it
as carefully as possible upon that
mantle, desk, or divan, without al
lowing any of it to escape through
the (oors or 'illdows. To find a
book used the day before, it is nec
essary to dig into the (lust as they
dig among the ruins of Pompeii,
searching for a knovledge of the an
cients.
We suggest that each janitor be
slppli-ed with a sprinkling call, so
lie can settle the (lust on the tables,
chairs, etc., before sweeping. Of
course, this would prevent the uni
form accumulation of dust upon
everything, but we would bear the
hardships for the sake of knowing
exactly how many cubic feet of dust
could be removed in the courise of
an hour or two.
Seriously, the trouble seems to
be in making the janitors do too
much work or in expe6ting too much
of them. If we had more and better
janitors manY of us would be able
toi enter our rooms and( sit downi
withbout having to first remove two
or three inches of (lust from the
chairs.
Irvine l''. I lelser, 'to, now~ at Yale,
wvho w~oni the Oxfordl scholarship last
year, writes that lhe has been ac
cep)tedl at Clirist Church College.
This is the college all our repre
sentatives have been adlmittedl to,
and( we congratulate Mr. Belser
upon01 being admitted to such an
highly (desi rable college of Oxford.
Young lady (at senior dlance):
"This floor is so slick that I'm afraid
I'll fall."
Senior Wall: "Never mind, just
1h01( onto the Wall."-Ex.
A Very Hasty and Jagged Ballade
of Baseball.
(WNith contrite apologies to MM.
Villen, Dlandelaire, (le i3anville, &c.,
no)w%%, presunably il I the )osom of
Abraham.) '
To a lowlier key I attune my Car
0 Sovereign Muse, anud all ye
Graces,
lan the range ai(l pitch you're
wont to hear;
'orsaking the shadows anld vin(y
spaces,
And the ships the rhapsodist sai(l
were Thrace's,
And the Orient casement, where
crinllms Climb,
No, no, Erato! I wvon't suffer your
traces
Wthen the April sun's shining in
baselball time.
They're off to the sound of a splen
(li(d cheer,
An d1 a (lomilant yO(el that must
be Alace's,
(i e so wakes the campus i' the fall
o' the year.)
The same (ld look in the same
ol( faces, v
As the Camecocks runII to their usual
places;
Ah, what's the good of this impo
tent rime!
These are at best only counterfeit
plrases
When the April sun's shining in
baseball time.
\ith a wva(l in his jaw, and a visage
alistere,
Our "Tommy" stridles up, and
very soonl laces
A nifty three-bagger way back in
the rear,
Anl(d the poor old Davidson fielder
chases,
And (1 our fellows are brceziig armunl
tle white bases,
Anud life seems worth living, faith
jist inl its prime,
AnI(d each crazy fanatic his neighbor
embraces.
When the April sun's shining in
baselall time.
En voi.
Then close up that trig, and those
musty law cases;
Come out an( "holler." 0 Gee.
it's sublime,
That second ecstatic; your blood
leaps anl races,
\\'hen the April sun's shining in
baseball time!
R. E4. G.
Jones: D o you carry any Ii fe-in
surance?
Irown: Yes ; I have ten thousand1
(dollars.
J1ones: \l ade payable to your
wife?
Brown: Yes.
Jones: Well, what kind of an ex
cUSe (10 you1 putt upl to your wife for
living ?-Ex.
Suitor: "Your dlaughter, sir- well,
er-hat---is-she told me to come to
you-she says you-"
Pater: "Quite so-I understand.
Let's see ; are you Mr. Bironson or Mr.
Whibbhles ?"
Suitor: "Why, I'm Mr. H-otchkiss."
BIRD SEED.
Don't be a T. W.
* * *
\h'Iio is K. C. Jones?
* * *
Our Sheppard has no sheep.
* *: *
\Vho can Fill up Arrowsmith?
Hall game sooi. Harems v.
101bbles.
* * *
"The Gamecock" is of neccessity a
confirmed bachelor.
* * *
Carolina's student colors-black,
browtn, green and white.
* * *
01h, happy Monday, that brings
the faculty to chapel!
* :1 *
A Freshman thought an aero
plaine was a carpenter's tool.
* * *
"Tiimie is money-and I have no
timle."-DAeWolf Hopper.
* * *
A Junior law student was sur
prised that the Police Gazette was
subscribed neither at Flinn Hall nor
inl the Library.
* * *
Quite different: "The Fall of the
House of Usher," and "The Fall of
the Usher of the 1 louse."
Also different: "Keep off the
grass," and "Keel) the grass off."
*1, * *
Carolina students usually look
down on performances at the theatre
-from tle "roost."
At the College for Women.
Next Monday evening at 8:30, in
the auditorium, Mr. Kittredge an(d
Miss Alexander will give what prom
ises to be a treat in the way of re
citals.
roii now until late spring we are
proised many such recitals by the
I)epartment of Music at the "col
lege," and we look forward to them
wvith much lpleasure.
Tlhe last of the series of three
lectures will be given next Tuesday
evening by Dr. Geo. Vincent, for
ierly dean of the University of Clii
cago and now president of the Uni
versity of Minnesota. The subject
will be "'The Mind of the Mob,"
and promises to be of cspecial inter
est to students of psychology. I'he
price to stuldelts i:i fifty cents.
Reward Offered!I
A\ reward of thirty-three andl one
third cents will be given the first
pers5on showving us wvherein lies the
humor of the following:
"T'lhere was a y oung man named
McColl
Who wvent to a fancy diress b)all
Ile thought just for fun
I Lc wvould go) as a hun11
And a (log ate him upl in the H-all."
Editor's Notice.
There will be an imp)ortant mo'et
ing of "The Gamecock" staff Mon
(lay morning immediately after
chapel. I,v'ery editor' is urged to at
t Cn1(1