Historical Newspapers of South Carolina

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^ _ "~ ' " ' - A A Winter Picture. : Tbe Witter rime is on the apple trees: Mfc The mulberries are bare: no longer shows ' The graeeful pear her wealth of burnished fruit Stripped is the slender plum: the orehard , wears A look of barren sadness: garnered in Are ail its purple, red. and golden trnits. "* And sterile shall it show t:li blossom time. gL Thus Nature, after labor, takes her rest. Sag,. Gaining fresh vigor for her tefcuiing time, W~ By'husbanding her strength: .and so the L . fields, neik Whereon in Autumn flowed the ruddy corn. Lie fallow for a season. 'Tis the time Of universal pxiuse from that hard toi! * That is the lot of ail our husbandmen: >Even the llowers are withered. And the birds "As stieotare as^s the scene around Beneath its snowy mi mml: no whistle wakes ^ The echoes of the jjlade, no melcdy. t Comes from the woodland spray?a deuth-Jike I calm, i f Serene and still, profound and beautiful. Lies over Nature as she tranquil sleeps. Chamber's Journal. To a Child. If youth were. mine,- and ^trrsce, and . early joy. (And once J was not old. Benise. nor stern,) ' I'd rinfr j'our brow with wreaths you would not spurn. And share with'you the kings h-ip of the Boy. Ah, that were grand, and you would not be . - coy! v Uowa TwoT-r> ih.u* ennrte we'd learn! I It m!ght be so?it might, if Time would turn, kOr Lovo coizM build -again what years>do- ! stroy. - Now, now, dear heart, I set* uo way but this? To trump your queen card with my simple knave, , Or like a Plautine lord when luck's amiss. Do-on the tunic?doff the latielave: <C Seal, if you will, the indenture with a kiss. But, kiss or no kiss* 1 shall rest your slave. E. C. Lefrov. _ ' DOHA'S DILEMMA. j Lou May ne stood before the tall dressing-glass, brushing out her.long,-silky, black hair with what seemed iinnecessary energy, while her dark eyes Hashed k and the rich color in h'er velvet cheeks jjiSv deepened. ^ Dora Lorn, a fluffy mass of white muslin, blue ribbons and \*e!low curls, i -7*~?s was tucked away, liko a kitten, in a big, blue-velvet easy-chair, and sobbing , in that gentle, subdued way that is, of all displays of grief, the most aggravating to witness. Lou turned and looked at her once, ^ with the brush elevated, as if she had - more than half a mind to llin? it at - her. J * "Upon my word, Dora," she said, "vou are the greatest idiot I know of ! * W hafc are you crying about? Surely j not because that old aunt of yours is dead? Why.yolu never saw her in your. * . lifel ^.Iti&jquite^absurd." < si> "What! When she left all her money to Harry and me?" "Oh, is that what you are crying about? Well, really!" "No, of course not. You know it is t on poor Ned's account He will be so fe. ' cut up." ?v- - "Will he? Why?" -T 3 - 1 _ X5? J. ~ a.1 1Z4.4.1 jL'ora giiueu. on kilo auouiei. iiiue i. patter of weeping. "I've?got?got?to marry Harry now, you?you know! The .money is * . left us on that condition." l "And you mean to ?ivc up the man I i you love for that old woman's dirty k.. money?" ejaculated Lou, in increduZ lous scorn. N - "You know," murmured Dora, v ' plaintively, "that the wishes of the ? dead ought to be respected." "Nonsense!" excraimed Lou, irrev^ erently. "The eccentric whim of a ' superannuated old woman, who never Ibk saw either of you." She finished adjusting her magnifi^ cent coronet of hair, biting her red lips all the while. T "Marry Harry, will she?" she was saying to nersen, m m:ngiea angerana amusement "What a little fool she is! I wonder how he feels about the legacy." ^ ? *.r . A little later, Lou Mayne- wassamit? pK. ering down the street in all the glory , of a4 new* winter toilette, a scarlet-;' . winged toque perched coquettishly above her jetty braids, and archest mischief smiling irorn her velvet eyes. Xot far away she met Harry Verner. "I am so glad not to have missed < you!" he exclaimed,.eagerly. "I was ; ? > . i ; ^ * Z * just going to your bouse! to ask you?" "And 1 am glad to have met you," interposed Lou. "1 wanted to congratulate you." } i f "Indeed!" he questioned, with a' 1 . 1 , (TT* l_ X *V. puzziea iook. --vyuatuur ^ "Oil your approaching marriage." ^ t Harry stared a moment, and then f*' 1 laughed and colored. "You mean my aunt's legacy? How does Dora take it?" ^ "Like a lamb," returned Lou, def , " murely. "Sheds a few natural tears to jti poor Ned's memory, but declares herl self ready for the sacrifice." ^ HaiTy laughed again, aud then,? r; "You're going to the ball to-night?;. Lou. Will yen let mo driveyou. over?,v 1|L Lou bridled tip, and'pursed liur prettv lips. ^ "What will Dora say??' * "Dora? Ned will take care of her, of course!" Lou shook her head very gravely. ' > "She wouldn't think of going with ' him now. She intends to marry you." "Indeed!" laughed Harry;" "but it ' takes two to make a bargain. You'll go with me to-night, Lou?"' "Perhaps," smiled Lou, and swept on. The moon had not ret risen when ^ < the party set forth, but it was bright starlight, clear 'and frosty. As young Verner drew up before the house in which Lou ilayne and Dora Lorn both lived. Xed Cuthbert was just behind him; and the two girls came out together,, both so mulllcd and veiled ?for tne night was coid?that in the obscurity one could hardly be told from r the other. "1 never should have knowni? was you, only for your hat," said Harry, as he tucked a rug round his precious freight, with a smiling glance of rccog nition at her scarlet-winged toque. ?dK* ""11 iS ai.i Miuspcitu xj\j u Mayne, as she stepped into Xed's trap. "I changed hats with Dora; she thinks B Harry wanted her to ride with him, . and he thinks he has got me." * They both laughed. The next moment were oft". Harry had two horses, but he managed to drive them with one hand, thus leaving the other free to gently insinur ate itself about the little muffled shape besides him. For he meant to lose'no time. Something in Lou's air that t afternoon had perhaps warned him of breakers. To his delight, no objection was _ made to the position of his arm, which " ..was not at all like coquettish Lou. ~ Greatly emboldened, he ventured to I expend the circuit, and bending his tall i head, murmured in the teuderest ac- | cent*,? "barling?" The figure he elapsed .gave a little Hj ^cony ulsive start. p. "^ou know already that I love you, rlpn?t you, dearest?'1 he proceeded". f Something between a gasp and a sob 1 ' >ame from behind the thick veil, but j no words. . "Wiil you be my wife, dear one?" | > he asked,'just as the other vehicle came y ; dashing up, making such a racket that [ ; he could not catch her reply. However, lie must have been satisfied ! as to its purport, or he would scarcely have strained her so fondly to him, and at jx convenient turn in the road, I i pushed up a corner of her veil to print J an impassioned kiss on the sweet lips. The ride was to culminate in a dance at a country house a few miles out. 1 Having arrived at which place, amid much jollilication, the ladies were duly assisted into the house and hastened to get warm and repair any damages to their toilettes. They were very merry in the ballroom soon after?all; perhaps, but j Uora. wnosc oaoy-iacc, usuaiiy giow- i ing with pink prettiness, had a white, { drawn look and a pitiful quiver about | the small mouth thai no one could kelp ' noticing. "What ails Dora?"' someone asked. ."Hush!" said Lou, hut wickedly rais- j , ing her own voice. "Don't you know j her aunt is dead?" The girl heard, and gave her curly I head an angry toss. "You ought to be ashamed of your- j self Lou," she whispered, presently. | "I never saw such a llirt in my life!" "Why, Dora!" was the reproachful j r*?r?7v "nnrfrmlv bcMllin I'm trvinp" to ! comfort poor Ned. for your shar&eful treatment of him." "He's wonderfully easily comforted," pouted the girl; ."and there's Ifarry too! How can you treat him so?" "Oh, he's your look-out now." Dora gave a childish lift of her pretty shoulders. "He hates me as bad as I do him, and 1 know it!" she said, "if he did?" She paused, blushed furiously, and then whispered,? "He made love to me dreadfully, though, on the road. Would you have believed he was so mercenary?" Lou laughed. "Yon'rn rathor woll mntehed ill that respect,' aren't yon?" Dora blushed scarlct. "Does?docs Ned seem to mind much?" she questioned, timidly. "Oh, no! He'll get over it easily enough," said Lou, lightly. "You needn't worry about him." v Dora bit her lips, and looked ready to cry. "He hasn't asked me to dance with him once this evening," she said, in a grieved ton<f. "Of course not) Do you suppose ye wants to dance with you, now that you j and Mr. Yerncr are going to be married?" "I don't know," said Dora. "I don't'! want him, and I don't want the money. He's welcome to it all." ' Oli, Indeed!" said Lou, looking terribly amused. "Well, perhaps you had better tell him so." "I would if I thought, Ned would make it up with me." "I don't know about that," returned Lou, sternly. "Rather doubtful, I should think." At this moment, who should come sauntering up but handsome Ned himself. . "Our dance, Lou!" he said quite gaily, and familiarly ofltering his arm. And then, as'tney strolled away, he nodded coolly to Dora, with? 'Not dancing, Miss Lorn? Shall I send you a partner?" "No!" Dora answered shortly. -Liiec, J^UUVYilig UIJUI suu w;ii> IU cry in spite of herself, she ran into a little waiting-room off the ball-room, supposing ^untenanted. . Harry.was there, staring'gloomily at his boots, nd wondering about Lou. "Hallo, Dora!" lie exclaimed. "Crying?" She went straight up to him, lifting the pretty tear-drenched face, like a flower dipped in dew. "Please, Harry," she cried, piteously, "yon may have all the money, and 7 Irnnw it wasn't ri^ht to let you po on so, to-night, and kiss me and all; but, please, I don't want to marry you." A light began to burst on HarryVerner. "Was it you or Miss Mayne I brought here to-night?;' he demanded.abruptly. Dora thought he had taken leave of his senses, but replied,? "3/c, of course! Lou said you wanted' to talk over the will with me." "Hang the will?" began Harry, excitedly. "If I don't settle with Miss Lou for this. Excuse me, Dora: I.never dreamed it was yon! I thought it was Lou all the time.'' He darted away, and just as Lou was finishing her dance with Ned Cuthbert, went up to them. With a peremptoriness that Lou, for once, never thought of resisting, he transferred her hand to his own, and holding it there, led her courteously, but firmly, to a spot where a friendly curtain screened them from the'general gaze. "A pretty trick you played me!" he bugai*, : sternly", stopping and looking at her. Lou's eyes were downcast, the dark, saucy face covered. with delicious blushes, and the .red;lips twitching nervously. "The least you can do now," he went on, "is to ride home with me and seU-Je it! Will you?1' '* "But what will Xed say?*' protested Lou feebly. iitr :n u- ! xiu win ue oiuu <-"L and you know it. Will you come?" "Perhaps," laughed Lou, as she adroitly ^slipped away from him;- . ^ - ? " And in spile of-all his efforts she persistently'evaded him all the rest of the evening. However, she rode home with him, and Dora with Ned. Both pairs must have eome to an amicable understanding, for there was a double wedding three mouths afterwards. And the legacy proved to be a delu sioii, airer an. The poor old woman-hadn't money enough to hardly keep herself; but her brairT was a little cracked, and she had a fashion of stealing away every now and then to a lawyer, aud getting him to draw up her will, devising imaginary legacies to whoever she happened to think of at the time. ? ? The hairdresser at the Jardin des | Piantes with his little son: "My boy, j here you see how unequally nature dis- ' tributes her gifts. This creature, for j instance. is the tortoise, of whose shell i the best hairpins are made, but which, ! unfortunately, has no hair itself." i Customer?Give me a p- ..ud of oleomargarine. Grocer ? Yes, ma'am; here's your change.. Customer?Why, you've charged me 10 cents; it used to be 18. Grocer?Yes, ma'am: but we UVl UiiU"'rw wvjowii JLV iiv" uiviv o t a law agin ft?so it's dearer.?.V. 1". j Mail. . , ~ , , ? * 2 >2 r > /?. < . ? - Etlith, you want to know "whether j funny fueii on newspajjers eyer laugh f at tneir own jokes." do you. dear? ! Yes, Edith, often: in fact, in a good j many cases you will lind that they are J the "only ones who do laugh at them; i but, of* course, this is conliuential.? j Boston Fosl. "THK MIKADO." The Story of the Xartedt .Operatic Pro(UTctioa. of <iiiut-rt and: Sullivan- The story opens in'tlie .court of KoKo's palace in Titjpu/a boautifnl picture giving, the feciing of tropical heat and vertical sunlight, to which the Japanese nobs, who are standing and sitting in attitudes "suggested by native drawings," give full effect by the movements of their fans: We are trentieuieti of Japan; On many a vase and jar. Ou many a screen and fan. We figure in lively paint; Our attitude's queer and quaint? You're wroiiir if you think it ain't. To them enters 2sanki-Poo, the hero tenor, wh?wi story is brielly thu-; Some years ago he had captivated Kn- ] tisha, an eiiii-riy i:uly of his father's court. According to the laws of the country, his father, "the Lucius Junius Brutus" of his race, ordered him to*' marry- the lady, within*a week or perish 011 the scaffold. lie lied the. court, assumed- the uis^uisc oi a second trombone, saw and loved Yum-Yum. whoreturned his allVeiion. Unfortunately for him Yir.ii-Yum was betrothed to licr guardian, No-Ko, :i clieap tailor. The despairing Nanki-Poo, seeing that j his suit was hopeless, lied the town, j "Judge of my delight;" lie says to the | questioning noijs, "when I heard that j ivo-Ko had been condemned to death ! for flirting," and hurried back to Titipu to lay hi.s heart at the lady's feet. But Ko-Ko was reprieved at the last moment, and raised to the rank of lordhigh executioner, under these rcuiarka- i ble circumstanees: The mikado, wishing to steady the young : en iu his kingdom, decreed that all who flirted, leered, or winked should be beheaded. This decree, very naturally Caused great dismay .throughout the land; For young :uid old And shy ami boid \\ ere equally affected. And so wo straight let oot to bail A convict from ilie county jail. Whose head was next On some pretext Condemned to lie mown oil. And made turn i.eadsman.l'or we said 'Who's ne.vt to lie decapitated Can net cut <>1T m.oihers head Until iK seui his<<-.vnoff." As tite logical mikado had rolled the two olliceia ui governor :nul headsman into one, Ivo-ILo, thy ex-cheap tailor, was now a great magnate, governor of Tit-ipu and iord high executioner. The lord -high executioner is assisted in his ofliee by Pooh-Bah, a tremendous swell, who describes himself as ":ipajrucuiary haughty auu exclusive person, of pre-Adamite ancestral descent. You wiil understand this when I tell you that I can trace my ancestry back to a protoplasmal primordial atomic globule. Consequently my family pride is something inconceiv-" able. 1 can't help it. f was born sneering. But I .struggled hard to overcome this defect. I mortify my pride continually. When all the great oliicers of state l-esigned in a body because they were too 'proud to serve under an ex-tailor did 1 not unhesitatingly accept all their posts at once? ' Pish?And the salaries attached to them? You did. Pooh?It is consequently my degrading -duty to serve this upstart as first lord of the treasury, lord .chief Justice,"" coiamando^irr-cWetriord hi?:h admiral, master of -the buckhoundr, groom of the back stairs, archbishop of Titipu, and lord mayor, both acting and elect, all rolled into one. Xanki-Poo's hopes are shattered when he hears of Ko-Ko's release and his intention to marry his ward. YumYum with Pitti-Sing and Peep-Bo now arrive from school, and the lovers indulge in some delightful love passages. But even the powerful Ko-Ko's love does not run'smooth, for as he is preparing for his nuptials a letter arrives from the mikado, who is struck by the fact that no executions have taken place in Titipu for a year, and decrees that unless somebody is beheaded within one month, the post of lord high executioner shall be abolished, and the city reduced to the rank of a village. As Pooh-Bah remarks, this is Qr* t Vio f ttt/-* orrrno it out to its logical conclusion. Kcnfco himself is the obvious victim, but hocan't execute himself because selfdecapitation is difficult, and, moreover, suicide is a capital offense: Ko?Besides, I don't see how a man can cut off his own head. Fooli?A man might try. Pish?Even if jou only succeeded in cutting it half off, that would be something. Pooh?It would be taken as an earnest of your desire to comply with the imperial will. Ko?No. Pardon me, but there I am adamant. As official headsman my reputation is at stake, and I can't consent to embark on a professional operation unless I see my way to a successful result. And the council agree that To sit 5n solemn silence in a dull, dark dock, In a pestilential prison, with a life-long lock. Awaiting- the sensation of a short, sharp shock, From a cheap and chippy chopptr on a bigblack bioek! And Ko-Ko is left to soliloquize. In the nick of time Nanki-Poo turns up with a rope in his hand and prepares to commit suicide rather than live without Yum-Yum. Ko-Ko sees his chance. Here is the required victim to save him. To the love-lorn NankiPoo, then, he put the advantages of arur execution?-; A *T r'-T rr ? n ; "You--don't?*-Observer'-Yon3!*- have* 1 a month to five, and you'll live like a fighting-cock at my expense. When the day comes there'll be a grand public ceremonial?you'll be the central figure?no one will attempt to deprive j you of that distinction. There'll be a procession?bands?dead march?bells " " * > _ x TT toiling?ail tne gins in tears?x umrum distractcd?then, when it's all over, general rejoicings, and a display of fireworks in the evening. ' You won't see them, but they'll be there all the same." And Nanki-Foo consents on one condition. "Let me marry Yum-Yum to-morrow," he says, "and in a month you may behead me." And Ko-Ko consents. In the midst of the revels consequent on this asiicable arrangement, Katisha, the elderly maiden, appears, recognizes Nanki-Poo, and tries in vain to reveal his identity to the assembly, who bid her go. Katisha is no Venus, and even goes so far as to:admit that she is "an acquired taste." "But I have a left shoulder-blade that is a miracle of loveliness. People come miles to see it. 31y ngbt eioow has a fascination that few can resist. It is on view Tuesdays and Fridays, on presentation of a visiting card. As for my circulation it is the largest in the wprld." The second act takes place in KoKo's garden?a garden of paradise, overhung with trees, bathed in sun- I light, with a river stretching far away in the distance. Alas! even the brief month of happiness is denied to these ill-used lovers, for Ko-Ko has discovered that by the mikado's law when a married man is beheaded his wife is bujried alive. Tableau. Despair, neigntenea dv tue newsoi me miKaao s arrival at Titipu. A victim must be J 35 found at once. Ko-Ko is struck by ?' happy thought Why won't an" a?p lidavit that Nanki-Poo has been ex<|[; cuted do as well as the execution i&. self? The coroner's certificate of exe* cution is handed to the mikado, the; deed is described in graphic lanj^uageiwhen the mikado explains that he has come on entirely different business-?-' namely, to look for Nanki-Poo, his missing heir. Fresh complications, for according to the coroner's certificate,* the gentleman is dead- . The deed is? confessed with ahj?efc humility. The? mikado only iaugns. "i>neer up, my: good fellows; never mind. How could ; you know?" When everything ap-! pears to be settled satisfactorily bis'J majesty suddenly, remembers that to encompass the -death -of the heir-ap-v parent is death?something lingering, with boiling oil in it, or melted led? information which he conveys with a pleasant smile. However, the difficulty is settled by marrying Katish to Ko-Kq,^ :md the mikado condoues all offenses. l'all Mall Gazette. ' New Orleaas. New Orleans?"New Awlins" as they it here?is not an imposing city. Much of its area is three or four feet below the Mississippi river, which forms a double crescent like the letter S. The distance back to Lake Pontchartrain is about four miles, the west end being the summer resort on the lake. The famous "shell road" is the avenue in this direction. Within the city the wider streets are lined with trees and grass in the. center. All kinds of outlandish, names ,abound. When you hear wMt' sounds'" likfe "Chapetula street" be sure to ask how it is spelled, and you will learn that it is "Tchoupitoulas." In the narrow , streets, and indeed in some of the wider, jj small streams of dirty water issue from I the houses and stores and run for rods before they seek the under-surface j canals, whence the contents are pumped into the Lake Pontchartrain. I The pavements are of great blocks, I poorly laid, over which the broad-axled cotton vans are constantly making a racket. Several little open spaces are dignified with the name of squares, one of them?formerly the circle?being named after the monument to Lee, and another bearing the name of Jackson, the president. Along the narrow sidewalks ladies are strolling in summerattire, while the diminutive policemen look on as if they were in dread lest some street fracas should call them into active work. The horse cars are filled with smokers as they trundle lazily along after the single mule harnessed with a choap arrangement of ropes. The business b:ocks of New Orleans are inferior. The theaters are reminders of those in Havana and Mexico, the fashionable part is the balcony, and no lady ever goes into the parquet The St Louis cathedral is a plain stone building that is hardly worth a visit. The cemeteries are of great interest, the Lafayette, one of the in in aIasai! U'itK O KlrfK AWA UlUCi) Lj 10 iULiU3tu utbu u, UJ-U wall, and the entrance to it is "tltfongfcj a narrow gateway. Th^-g^r^ai^um* New Orleans cemeteries, and burial houses are so closel^Bfcer, that it looks impossible to iinl?ffen for another body. An enterprisi^HISfc. has just erected a tomb ^ will let spaces for the burial oi^tlgjc bodies. Narrow walks wind'amo'ng these dwelling-houses of the dead, with which the entire inclosure is tilled. The inscriptions show that the occupants came from the Freneh provinces. St Charles street is the fashionable avenue for residences. Nearly all of them are built of wood at an elevation, to keep them from the water. They stand in the midst of large yards, in which orange, magnolia, and lemon trees are in full foliage, and great quantities of flnwp.rs are in blossom. The front spates are locked and the visitor must ring a bell before lie cau reach the front door. Every house has a large exterior tank for rain-water. Many of these tanks are three stories high and resemble Chinese pagodas.?Cor. Springfield Jlepublicaiu How Long An Advertisement Serves. One of Commissioner Ham's adventures at New Orleans is related by him as follows: "A little thing that made a great impression on me when I was a lad was an advertisement in rhyme, printed in the Maine Farmer when it was published at Winthrop by Dr. Holmes. It ran as follows: "Ezra Whitman to his friends, This humble notice, greeting sends! "That couplet has come to me ahundred times in the course of my life. With Mr. Whitman I was not acquaint ed, and it was such a simple thing that I don't see how it became so fixed in my memory. One February day, at New Orleans, while my thoughts were far away from Winthrop, a fine-looking, elderly gentleman, apparently about 75 years of age, came into the Maine headquarters. " 'Are-you from Maine?' I asked, as I asked scores of other people. 44 'I am. My name is "Whitman,' ho replied. 44 'In what part of Maine do you live?' 44 'Winthrop.' 44'Mr. Whitman,' I said, 'do you remember a rhyme like this: " 'Ezra Whitman to Lis friends, This humble notice, greeting sends?' 44 4I guess I do; 1 wrote it,1 said he. 44 'Well, how long ago was that printed?' "Fifty-two years,' said he after thinking an instant. n TTArt-ioamf A I oof "i. ICLtJ gWU autgiuogiuvuu wv all that time, wasn't it?'?Lcwiston (Me.) Journal. Plantation Philosophy. We ken alius furgin er nuder pusson easier den we ken furgin ourselbes. Ef I makes a mistake an fools roun' de wraung man, it takes me er laung time ter furgin mvse'f fur not habin mo' judgment. Its dc odd sarcumstance dat ketches de roan on de hip. We ginnerally knows how ter han'lc de sarcumstances whnt ain't odd, case we knows dar tricks. I neber wants ter box wid er lef handed man nor rassle wid er bowlaijjed pusson. I ain't got nuthin ergin er pusson whut likes ter war rings an' shiny pins, but I doan think dat such pussons eber 'complishes much good till arter da draps dat sorter foolishness. De tree haster shake off de bright bloom 'fore de fruit am gwineter come. I neber wastes my time in wushin dat I wuz like de man whut am great an er way up yander. I doan kere how high de buzzard fly?way up 'merg de clouds?he's got ter come down"arter while an' bo jis ez low ez a bird whut couldn' fly ha'f so high.? Opie P. Bead. One happy Junior at the promenade was recognized by the young ladies as the gentleman with "the old-gold mustache."?Tate Record. Lv Fast-Flying V<".M F.avI. "I've held my w.-:t;!i on about every kind of wild duck tli-.'i.- i?," said It. W. Winans, an old-tim:- \vi;d-:'?>wl hunter, "and lean tell just about 10 the sixtythird part of a dot Low much space any one of ?em can got over in a:i hour. There's no railroad train on the continent that can hold a camlre to one side of the slowest duck that iiies. "The canvasbaok can iiiat:ince the ' whole duck family, if ifl^vs itself out iid do it When the canv&sbac'fc is out I taking; things easy, enjoying :i little run "arotftid.thc block, as it were, it jogs through the air at the rate of eighty iailes an hour. If it has business some J-where and has'-to get there, it puts two behind it eve^y minute it- keeps < ^wkrjs flapping, and does jfc Mfi&Go you.or I would stop into Fritz's and for bebr. If you don't "believe it' ..Just fire square at the leader in a string of cauvasbaeks that aru out ou a business cruise some time when you get the chance. Duck shot travels pretty quick, but if your charge brings down any one of these ducks at all, I'll blow you off to a pair of the best there is in the market, with trimmings and all, if it isn't the fifth or sixth one back from i Aho I/jqHac thif. <!rnrw Tf rnn lmw I ihe faintest idea that you will bring the leader down you must aim at space not Jess than ten feet ahead of Lim. Then he'll run "plump against your shot When he drops you will lind him a quarter of a mile or so on. "The mallard duck is a slow coach. It's all he wants to do to go a mile a minute, but he can do it when it is necessary. His ordinary, every-day style ol getting along over the country gets him from place to place at about a forty-five-milc-an-hourrate. The black dtick is about an even mate for the miallard, and the pin-tail widgeon and wood duck can't do much better. The redhead can sail along with case and cover his ninety miles an hour as long fort lc ir?rtlinrt/? f/% Thn liTilrt-Witt rr ed;teal and its handsome cousin,' the green-winged teal, could fly side by sick for 100 miles and make the distance neck and neck, for cue can fly. just as fast as the other, and to go 100 miles an hour is no hard task for either of them. The gadwale?you don't know what a gadwale is, I'll bet! I thought not. Wei), it's a duck that doesn't get cast very often, but is very well known in the west. It is something like a mallard, only harder to shoot; because it is not so unsuspecting as the mallard. The gadwale is something of a dais}% too, on the fly, and I will; win money for you every time, if I you^bet it can make its ninety miles an [ hour. \aiay De you wouiun t ininiv mac a. | goose could almost double discount the fastest fast express train that runs on I our railroads, but it can every time. I mean a wild goose. It has a big, heavy body to carry, but it manages to glide j frotn-one feeding grouud to another |Egjtjfcyi.^uddenness that is a caution to 1 Isving shots- To see a flock of honkers along, so high up that they be scraping, their-iu^cks against neve?~bei!eYe"~they were traveling, between eighty and a hundredn lifes an hour, but they are. The wild goose never has any time to fool away, but his gait is always a business one. The broadbill duck is the only wild fowl that can push the canvasback on the wing. Let a broadbill and a canvasback'each do his best, for an hour and the broadbill will only come out about ten miles behind. A hundred and ten miles an hour can be done by the broadbill, and he, consequently, makes a mark for a shotgun that a greenhorn wouldn't hit once in twentyseven years."?i'an Francisco Examin&r. Practical Joke on Gen. Shei-uian. Some War reminiscences published in the Cleveland Leader record a laughable practical joke perpetrated upon Gen. Sherman. The General was visiting the headquarters of Gen. Howard while at Goldsboro, JST. C., and while there felt the need of a small draught of whisky to drive off the effects of malaria. Gen. Howard's rigid temperance principles precluded the idea of obtaining whisky from him, but when Dr. John Moore, the Medical Director, came in Sherman gave him the wink and said: "Doctor, have you a seidlitz powder in your quarters?" The doctor said he had. Gen. Howard said: "Gen. Sherman, it is not necessary to go to the doctor's quarters; I have plenty of seidlitz powders here, and good ones, too. 1 will get you one." If there was anything in Hownnnrtniv lliof Rhurmfin did not want it was a seidlitz-powder, and therefore said to Howard: "Never mind, General; give yourself no trouble. [Howard was then getting the powder and glass of water ready.] I will be going by Moore's quarters after a while." Dr. Moore quickly took in the situation and became a party to the joke on Gen. Sherman, to whom he said: "By the way, General, I don't think I have a seHiiiz-powder in my quarters, and yhad better take the one God. Howard has." By this time Howard had the powder all ready for use, and handed the glasses to Sherman. Rather than offend Howard by saying he meant whisky he drank the foaming stuff, much to his own disgust, to the satisfaction of Gen. Howard and toH.he amusement of the staff officers. In Case of Accidents. "And now, ladies and gentlemen, to conclude, I will show you a very curiious experiment I carefully exhaust o!? in thn -rinrlif-_r?inH PnQTVlhnr flf tUV/ *** V>" w"* | this vessel, and then you will see these two suspended weights exactly counterbalance each other, although the one is twice as heavy as the other, thus reversing the ordinary laws of gravitation." But something went wrong; and, while the small weight flew upward tho big one came down with a crash, and an audible titter went round the hall as the assenblage dispersed. The young lecturer turned despairingly to a white-haired sago who had been seated close to the table: 'Professor, you know the theory is true, for you taught it to me, and yen have seen me successfully perform that experiment in your own laboratory. Then how do you account for this mishap?" "My dear boy." replied the scientific star, "when you have had my experi ence, yuu wiu &uuw miti caucii aro not always to be trusted. The best j behaved in the laboratory seem to take I a pleasure in going wrong before an j audience." "But I have seen you do that par- i ticular one in public, at the Royal Institution and other places, a dozen times without the slightest hitch," said the youth. | "Yes," admitted the old gentleman, with a curious twinkle in his eye; "but then you see, I invariably took a little precaution against accidents. I used always to tie up a heavy weight i wun a iuue mi 01 string. 1 t % \ . [ FK!:i>ERICK THIS GREAT. It is related of an illustrious Russian general, that when a'% lie lived for some time at the conrt of Frederick the Great, where the following incident occurred: . After the death of his, lather, his mother had many a i.ard struggle to , support herself. ' This fact was well known to hersbo; whose gre3ijst ambition at this lime .was to be able toproviiie comforts for her bv his own exer tions. To his soEro'wvbs s*>on found that it . wad quite ia^essible to save any money for that uf^-pose out pf,-his small allowance. jfit^did not des^Br,however, ' bnt a^sldubiialy set* himself to watch'fcis oppWiurrityr- ;i' * v/< i < iSJangtfcniai' idea Hashed through his mind.f lt.fjvaa a recognized custom that one of the pages should sit up all night, in a room adjoiuiug the king's sleeping aparLment, to be ready at any moment to obey a summons, should the king require his services.. Fritz discovered that to some of the pages this duty was both burdensome and disagreeable, and that to provide nbstitute thev would gladly give a vOi ain sum of money. Fritz offered to lake upon himself the night-watch for, any one who might be willing to pay' him rather than accept the duty when their turn came round. ' . The offer was acceded to by several, and the money thus earned was regu- . larly senti>y Fritz to his mother. One night, the king could not sleep, and determined at last to call the page in attendance to read aiottd to him. He called; but there was-no response. At length he ro<e and walked iuto the ante-chambcr. to look if there really was no page on duty. - ? ' Here he fouud a page, indeed, sitting at his post, but sound asleep. Slipping, quietly forward to the table at which the boy was sitting, the.king's eyes iell upon a letter \yhich Fritz had been wrii.inor to his mnthnr when overDOW ered by sleep. Trie king read the following lines: ."My Deaiu.y Beloved .Yotheb: This is Uic third ni^HL that I cave uiiicu ivatchduty for a comrade. lean scarcely hod out any longer; but I rejoice greatly that I ha\c air.d.i earned ten thaiers for yon, which i i-eiui in this letter." . . With a heart deeply touched by this proof of tender filial affection, the king went softly back to his room, took out two rolls of ducats from a drawer, and returned to the sleeping page, into; whose side pockets he gently slid the rolls of money. Then betaking himself again to bed, the king considerately left exhausted nature to restore itself. Fritz at last awoke with a start, to "? ? * ?- t -1 ? 1 I nna mat ne muse nave siept xor several hours; and, when lindiug his pockets heavy, he thrust his hands in and pulled out the precious rolls of money, he conjectured at once what had happened. ' :> '? Fear made him tremble, for it was a heinous offence to be caught asleep at his post; but in spite of aircr sirauae lie cj^cl/J u cookie" could not but rejpice, for now he hatf amplerocsiiSL!#7: assist his mother for a lon^ time to come; and he hoped that the king,who, in the goodness of his heart, had'put the ducats into his pockets, would pardon his grievous fault. In the . morning he seized the very first opportunity to approach the king, acknowledge the great dereliction of duty ot wmcn ne naa Deen guuiv, auu humbly beg for pardon. One hurried glance at his monarch's benevolent countenance was enough, for there he read not only forgiveness but approval; the kind eyes bent upon him melted him to tenderness, and it was with a faltering voice he now gave expression to his heartfelt gratitude and thanks for the munificent gift his majesty had bestowed on him. The king did not attempt to conceal the high admiration he felt for the filial love which had prompted Fritz to such noble, self-denying exertions. He made a few kindly inquiries regarding his mother's circumstances, assured himof his entire sympathy, and promised that. from that day it would be his endeavor to promote tnc interests and pave the way to advancement of such a faithful, loving son. And Frederick the Gre:it was as good as his word. Step by step,; as years rolled on, Fritz rose from one position r\-f li tn finntlior mil <i? VirnVP aflf? I skillful general he served his beloved king faithfully and well even to old age. ?Boston Commonwealth. The Fashion in Jokes. The plumber joke is getting a little out of season, but it may be packed in camphor and will be in style when the freezes come again. The roller-skate joke js very popular, and is worn on all occasions, either with or without trimming. The rich editor joKe docs not appear to pall upon the taste. It is quite becoming when worn with passementerie or edging. Spring poetry jokes are undergoing a revival and are quite au fait iii recherche circles. With a waste basket overskirt they may be worn either morning or evening in the house. : ' The young-man-and-girl's-pa joke holds its own, and is really one of the ?*, 4- "fn cT"* o K1A C OAri in 1X1U3L uwyui.^ " ? polite society. The mule joke js relegated to the commoner classes, and may really be called "old fashioned." It: is still, in favor in the rural districts, and seems destined to continue so for several' years. The angry-wife-at-3 - o'clock - in- themorning joke is not in such favor as formerly, but still many insist upon making it part of their daily wear. The liver-pad joke has almost disappeared. Occasionally, however, it may be seen tied in with a knot of ribbon quite prettily. The honest-political joke is too decollete to be popular. If cut high in the neck it might reign for a brief season. ' . . The sleeping-policeman joke had many friends and bade fair to become courtly in its stylo, but it lacked tone and fell into line with ordinary styles. Puds are popular with all classes. They may be worn as bangles, and in an in liuite variety of ways. The boarding-house pie, hash.orgumsboe steak joke enjoys a periodical renaissance and seems to retain its original J uster. When made up properly it is still a favorite. The young-husband-paregoric joke ' may be worn "on evening occasions, and it is not altogether out of style. The fashions in other lines continue about the same as per last report. Of course, with new demands come new supplies, and though there is . nothing entirely new the old things are so aristocratically worked over that they pass quite readily for original designs.? A Tj> /> // ?j / '/V/M */>/<? y .'IV / V//?U*/?V A ' MTVVVVf . ^ ? Speckled trout comc up in the water of some artesian wells in Nevada. The supposition is that they came from subterranean lakes. Lincoln and His Law Office. - As a lawyer Mr. Lincoln never at I tained the high rank and. reputation of ! Evarts, Brady, Sewfird, Carpenter, or Webster. He nerer had their kind of practice, nor did he have fifty thousanddollars as a retainer, or -a - great city ; press to.report his speeches.to-.the million. His largest fee was -?p,000 in a railroad case. *v;? , . (i Although notably successful, his peculiar strength lay; in his reasoning of ' facts more *han the law he cited. Few men ever lived with a broader araso.of ; human nature and. a clearer way of ex-., plaining things.' This' came to him by his" ^enraS'antfiatmtfaii, rind that early battle with poverty of resources to: gain wisdom that" j, i u %iw a marvel' ons memory, of all be learned* . . A lar^e, ungraceful-fraiue,tbat to others would have been a hindrance, was to him, in Illin6ls, an element of greatness. As a trial lawyer, bis grasp of the merits and mastery - .of the right theory to win with, made him p. powerful advocate before a jury. His manner was so plain that it enforced attention; his eves were- piercing, his look so earnest, his words so apt while, speaking, that even an adversary became convinced by his reasoning. One who heard him' in Leavenworth, during the early Kansas troubles, said: "Although his audience, was largely of enemies, fifteen minutes later they were cheering him like friends." He put a clear reason in all that he said, and clinched it by an incident that carried conviction straight to the hearts of his hearers. His keen, quaint, crisp stories were only side-lights to bring out his word-painting in bolder relief.' Like the brilliant Carpenter, whose style was somewhat similar, he held iiis auuieiice uy u jiuwci ui a icat, j? best suited his puxposg?__cyea without seeming to be eloquent His'modest office in Springfield, was in the second story of a plain red-brick block, reached by narrow, dingy stairs; large and poorly furnished, supplied with numerous odd-looking chairs and tables and not very inviting in appearance. Such conveniences as typewriters, file-cases, letter-files,' and book-racks^; were then unknown in Springfield. A few old briefs remained; in his plain hand-writing; and verymany law-books . lined the walls, incases, but neither rickcai*pets nor fine ceilings adorned the-firm's office. The days of good law-offices bad not arrived, and the solid comforts of the averagecity lawyer were all ' unknown to Mr. Lincoln, save as he found them with bis. favorite counsel, Leonard Swett, in Chicago. . Born and reared in poverty, he inherited by it both a fundof humor and a vein of sadness that never left him. In his struggle with the world in youth and with war in manhood; called to high stations before he was-fully known to the people, it is doubtful if ho ever fuliy realized the fame he had won as an advocate, or the- genius he possess- ed as a man. He was born of has time, a creature .of the age of giants, a getting jLhe peonSe^all the orator for-. liis struggles,"for~TTe really did" mora than auy man o?-?bis -day- to destroy caste and give.- -courage.,to-.the lowly, fend therein he wrote the brightest pa^es of human progress. ;. With Lincoln promoted labor became honorable, and men no longer denied their humble beginning. Lincoln; the lowly, the exalted, the pure man in rude marble, the plain cover, to a gentle nature, the giant, frame and noble intellect! The shaft f-'.vrtf morVc roctrno* tTlA books he read, the office be used, the strong body that covered his warm heart and wise purposes were only the outer symbols to the higher gifts of his Creator! All gifts and graces are never found in one person. He is great if the; good predominates. All arenot born equal. Gifts are diversified; but if ever a .man had the genius oj grcdiiuss it was Lincoln/ As all are eloquent in that which they know, he was eloquent in the allairs of life.?J. W. Donovan, in Uie Current. m ? Pen Paralysis. Many stenographer's* and persons who make their living by constant use of the pen or pencil are afHictcd with pen paralysis; and, although, as a general thing, this trouble can be cured by a few months' rest, some of those writers afflicted with it never recover. Nobody knows the strain of incessant penmanship upon the muscles and nerves of the hand and wrist better, or perhaps as well, as those who pass through a daily experience of that nature. ?' - * Telegraph operators are likewise afflicted with paralysis of the same muscles. A Times reporter had a conversation recently with a first-class operator, and asked this question: "I understand that first-class telegraphers are the only ones who <ret telegraphers* paralysis; why doirt the second and ' third-rate operators get "Because," replied the Morse man, "a good operator is paid a good salary, and is consequently kept constantly working at the board, while' a second or third-rate man has many resting spells, which allow him to stretch his arms, and thus escape paralysis Many men who have been working for the company for years, and were getting good wages,- have been compelled to give up their lucrative .employment'by telegraphers' paralysis. You notice it first in .the muscles of you? arm, which . becomes numb after a hard day's work, on/^ voii-liin civ month* nfter the first shock the stoutest operator, will succumb. This paralysis, however, does not destroy the use of your arms and fingers entirely, but while you are able to Tift and handle objects of any considerable size, you will not be able to ' button your coat or suspenders." "Don't that account for. some mistakes made in telegraphing?" "Yes, indeed. Many mistakes m telegraphing, ctflW^eri "STfirst to defects in the machinery, have been :tra'?ed to paralysis in the operator, because it soon becomes evident that the operator has lost his sense of touch. You see, the slightest pressure on the key over* what is required will .produce another letter than the one intended by the operator, and so it soon comes about that what the unfortunate operator at first attributes to overwork finally comes to be an evident loss of sensitiveness of touch. This usually occurs from six to ! eight years alter an operator rtas oeeu working steadily as a first-class man." ?Hartjord Times. Said Herman Glass, a grasping Galveston landlord, to Tom Scantling, one of his tenants: "I want you to pay up your rent right off." "I haven't got any money." "But you have got to pay it anyhow." "Now, you look here; if voir keep on dunning me for that rent when I've not got a cent, do you know what I'll do? I don't like to do it, but you'll goad me to. it" "What will you do?" "I'll buy me a house for cash, and put a stop to this paying rent by the month."?Texas Sijtings. ' GEXEXl.iL N*EWS ITEMS. ?The Florida Constitutional Convention lias done little so far except to organize. ; ?Another indictment for grand larccny in the-first degree has been found against Ferdinand ward. ?There has been no noteworthy change in General Grant's condition daring the past ten days. : ?Seventeen-vear locusts, in count- : ' less- numbers, have made their appear; ance in Fayette county, Dl. ?Dr. Schlicuuui. of London, is going to Florida for the benefit of his. health by advice of his physicians. . ?The Paris Temps says, that China has asked France to occupy Langson, whicli piace is overran with pirates. ?The Ohio Republican State Convention last week nominated for Governor J. B. Foraker on the first ballot. ?A proclamation has been issued declaring the State -of. Panama under martial law. The City of Panama is quiet. ?It is stated that Gladstoue will be flp-ain nlaned at the head of the Snor lish ministry, notwithstanding his recent resignation. 4 ?The cholera in Spain is spreading, ' and. the increase in the number of cases now daily reported is.causing great alarm among the people. " : ?The New Hampshire Republican Legislative caucuslast week nominated Blair for re-election to the United States Senate on the first ballot.1 ?The Mexican Band, that was so popular at the New Orleans Exposition, has started out on a tour of eoncerts through the principal cities of the North. . * "\ ?me Colombian torces nave suppressed the insurgents at all important points. Confidence in the government is restored and -business- prospects are improving. ?The new theatre being made oat of the old Masonic Temple in Philadelphia will be the largest place of amusement in the United States, seating 3,900 persons. '' ?A fire on Thursday In Chinatown, , - ^ San Francisco, burned the interior of the Chinese Theatre and destroyed several adjoining buildings. Loss $65,000. Insurance unknown, ?Business in .the Illinois Legislature was recently interrupted by a quarrel CnAAl'An DAtM?A_ UVIWCUII opc-uivci liaiu^o >uu sentative West, who indulged in mutual abuse and shaking of fists. ?At Lynchburg. Va., owing to an overstock," four of the five cigar factories there have shut down entirely s and the other one nearly so. The suspension will probably continue for one month. - - - - . ?-Ex-Governor Jarvis, the new minister to Brazil, was entertained at an ^ ^ elaborale^bap.quetiu -Xorfoik, ?United States Minister Jackson met the Mexican minister of foreign relation last Friday afternoon"'for the first time. Ex-Minister Morgan has left the City of Mexico for New York via Vara Cruz. ?At a church in Fairfield, Conn., last Sunday, a swarm of bees entered the building during the services, and so demoralized the congregation that the minister was compelled at last to close the exercises. ... ?The colored people of Ohio are said to be much opposed to Foraker, the Republican nominee for Governor, , because he opposed a bill allowing the colored children to attend the same schools as the white children. ?A dispatch from 2sew River, Tenn., one hundred miles above Chattanooga, on the Cincinnati Southern Railroad, says that a tunnel caved in on Tuesday on a constructioairaiu-aod six persons ? were killed and twenty injured. ?The secretary of the treasury has directed that the purchase of "silver buillion for coinage'into standard do!-lovo T\\r tviinfc of IcfclD U\ CiiVy iUIA>UU^>UU3 VI LU1ULC a? San Franciscb and Carson City be discontinued. The coinage of standard dollars is to be confined to other mints. ?The- British Resident at Cashmere reports that earthquake shocks con- . tinne, of great severity. The towns of Baramuila andSoprer have been utterly ruined and four hundred people killed. There has also been great loss of life in the adjacent villages. Many cattle and sheep* have been killed. ?General Simon B. Buckner, of Kentucky, the Confederate General who surrendered Fort Donelson to v General Grant, was married at Richmone, Va., on the evening of the ldth inst., to Miss Delia Claiborne, daughter of Major John H. Claiborne, one of Richmond's most prominent and estimable citizens. ?Twelve miles from Zacatecas, Mexico, is the celebrated Santa Terbncia De Laveta Grande mine, that has produced ever since the Spanish conquest. It has been newly developed and fitted throughout with the most costly modern machinery. Last week the mine was totally wrecked by au explosion plainly heard at Zacatccas, of five hundred cases of giant powder. Ten persons were killed. ?The throne of the Empress of Russia is completely covered with plates of gold, and contains 1,500 rabies and 8,000 turqnoises, besides many other rare and costly gems. The throne of the Czar is known as the diamond throne. Russia possesses more precious stones than any other nation, a majority of which were procared at th? expense of blood. The jewels in the Cathedral of Moscow alone are valued at ?12,000,000. ?The upper house of the Illinois Legislature passed an important bill last week, the intent of which is the discontinuance of the system of contract labor in the State penitentiaries. The Act provides that in future the entire government and control of the Illinois penitentiaries will be vested in the penitentiary commissioners, the. uoveruor ucuig an ex-uj/usiu ixjcuiuer of the board. The wort of the convicts is to be confined to such labor as may be requircd"t>y thtTState. ?-Congressman Hemphill is highly delighted with the appointment^of Mr. E.M. Boykin as United States marshal for South Carolina. For more than two weeks there was never any doubt in mind most about Mr. Boykin's appointment, but Mr. Hemphill was not quite so confident. He made frequent calls at the White House and the department of justice, and while his information there derived was not discouraging, be was not lniiv satisfied until appointment was announced. Mr. Boy kin had eight rivals to contend against. \ v, " -aur*"