THE P sV ~i ' JOHN C & EDWARD^ Bi B.WIIERLE, ' ?BEEMVILILE. S. O. DEALER IN 69LD &I8 SILM V&TC1SSI CLOCKS, JEWELRY, SPECTACLES* 18 & 82 Carat 8olid Huptial Rings, SILVER & SILVER-PLATED If WORK of all diadrtrlloDs in hio lino doqo protuptly.jRI Oot 27 as ly / ' . GREENVILLE PAPER MILLS. THE undersigned have this day formed a copartnership under the narao of JAINES BAlfNISTER A SON, T?at> fLa nti(*t\aoa Aoan??*inf? an |La * VI DUO |/UI VI VCUI VII %UU aa OP I* A X? 353 R. Jimea Bannister, T. J. Bannister. t THE Mills aro now in excellent order, and we are prepared to turn out a . , FIRST CLASS.PAPER, Which we will warrant to givo satisfaction. A FULL SUPPLY OF PRINTING. COLORED, TARM WRAPPING Can be found at all times at our Agents, Messrs. David & Strap i LEY 8. September 1, 1869. 16-tf NEW MIILINEHY. MRQ. L. T. JENNINGS, RESPECTFULLY INforma her friend* and tho public generally, that ihe has j n 11 received and BEAUTIFUL. AND HANDSOME LOT OF FALL AND WINTER MILLINERY, Which abe offers at prices low and reasonable. Ladies before purchasing their HATS. BONNETS. RIBBONS. AC.. Would do well to give her call, at i?or old tand. Oct IS SI ?m mas. wAwors HEW H1UOHEXT ESTABLISHMENT, OH Avenue Street, la the feat ofllr. Beat-, tie's Store, and next to Dr. Dean's Of. floe. The enbecrlbor baa received a new and beau, tifal assortment of Fall and Winter MlUiaery also beautiful Bridal Bonnets. Dress making in all Its branches. Drissss Cut and Basted at the shortest notioc. 55-8m Nov 10 IS tf . The State of South Carolina. OREENVILLE COUNTY, la the Common Pleas?Equity Side. TIIOMAS 0. OOWER, Adininistrator, es. P. F. SUDDUTII, ?t Greenville, B. 0., Dee. S7th 186f. ) TI1IS m to fire notice that under recent order* from the department, that ell that portion of Dirlaion No. 6, 3d Collection Dia trlet of Booth Carolina, embracing ell of the County of Plckena, bee been attached ho the 7th Diriaioo. I do hereby notify ell pertiee who here felled to nieko their return* for the year 1860, to do ao at owe# to the nadereigwod or antyoet Utemaelree to the fall penalty of the Jaw. >, v BKVBY a HACK. Awletent \m*mor, 7th Dir. 8d DUt. 8. O. Dmw n u ~T0WHES ^ EASTjT atf - - ?- em* ; Botionroms i* saxmnr. rpn* UNDERfltoUVIf AVIWO VO*M*l> X a copartner*?) in in the praetlee of Law In QmenrHIa and the aarrounding Ooaatlea of Andaraca. Oennae, Piekcaa, Spartanburg end Leo rani, wfll giro prompt ettantioa te ellbuaiaaaa enCraaied to theaa. , aW> IT l a* UMiarlU. I T^nrti ?vn n. imk Haw 1? - - U * w. X. lAiur. a. a. wgLLt MABLMT * WELLS, Attorney* til OonaUotl at Law . AKD IN JB^UJTY, t aHB?KVTLLlT8 O., 4 TJt tOTICS ts tba Court* of the Stato and X or lb# Ttnlttd BtaMa, and giro Mpoolal attention to Wlfor any pavava. SpeeUl attasJP ^Btlaa will Ka glrao to REPAIRJBBStilP^TNU fl-ia WatebM of arory d*? erlptlua. Baat NftrtBM gtr.n. JAMBA O. BLACK. Jum a* ? M ( i-J i I ... S flT>T? I U K-Lj Jmcrtefo to Vitvos, \ *& W.$ Vjl"" .. . * ^4 ? '?<* * J jLEY, PRO'RS. - ; r . I Ifn ii G. F. TOWNBS, EDITOR. J. C. UAIL.EY, ASSOCIATE f Rubrcriptios Two Dollar* p*r annum. ItnimmiiH InwrUd at Ik* rat** of ooo flellsi p?r fquiirv of twelve Minion line* (this siied typo) or 1st* for tho first insertion, n fifty oent* oivch tor the soeaiifl end third lnser- e lions, fad *woniy-flve Qents for subsequent insertions. Yearly contracts will he made. r All advertisement* ihust have the number _ of it lertiaoi marked on Chens, erthsy will be 3 inserted till ordered out, and charged for. ] .diXCS# 4,"UW*'* J Obituary notices,Yutd att taatters inuring te 1 to the benefit of any ono, an regarded as ItTtrtS lp3rt? ' t "L^t jgfc, Hayq Ktui'c!""" "" b Let mo bare muatewhtin molding Is breaking' t Music as glad as the bird's merry lay ; ( The flute's mellow tones end the seft bens, awaking 'i J To weieome the day I Let me have music when high noon Is shining 1 t Bnch as wolocmc the hero, returning again i p Tho deep rolling drama, with the bugles combining, g A wild, warlike strain 1 Lol mo h*T? mnita when twilight ie felling? t The home-like piano, the harp, the gaiter* i The eongi of the heart, and old ballade? J * recalling Tlio bright land* afar. Let me hero manic when midnight ie blending, | In.still, golotnn beauty, tho earth and the ] skies; \ Then on the doep tone* of tho organ aacending, Mj spirit would riae I Gay mnaic at morning, my a lumbers dispelling; t Proud musio at seen, noble deeds to incite; g Soft music at twilight, of home and loan telling^ Heaven's music at night t g [Ifiw Or lea as Sunday Timti. ^ Jtortj fat tljt labiM. n ./"(?^assr A\ swsra??-18 a ? i < dt aut iirDoira. ( A ciieorful south room, with a * bay-window fall of blossoming * i)l an la; a bright firo glowing hehind a burnished grate; a car not * whose soft, velvet pile was shaaed I iu blues and wood colors, to cor- 8 respond with the damask-covered furniture; aud a little gilded clock, c which had just struck nine at night ?all tlicse things met Mrs. Chick- J orK-'c ovn n? h1i? laid down licr ' book, unci yawned as widely as her ripe cherry of a mouth wonld admit. Sho was a plump, tair-faced matron of some fonr or five and twenty, with bright auburn bair, soft blue eyes, and ft complexion whose rosos stood in need of no Artificial rouge to hoightcn their charms, while her dress of soft crimson merino was exquisitely adapted to her semi blonde style. " Fanny," said Mr. Cbickcrly, looking up from his newspaper, " did yon call on those Carters today ?" u No I never thought of it." " And they leave town to-morrow raorninr; and Carter is absurdly sensitive to all slights, fancied or real. Fanny, I desired you to make a point of calling." u Well, I did intend td, Frauk," pouted Mrs. Chickerlv, " but one can't think of everything." " You cannot, it seems." " It appears to me that yon are making a mountain out of a uaolo hole," said J^anny, rather tartly. " It may effect my business very seriously. Carter's house carries groat influence witb it." Mrs. Cliickerly was silent, patting the velvet carpet with her 8 foot in a manner that indicated .v some annoyance. 441 shall have to leave here very r early to morrow morning," said 0 her husband, presently. 44 To go to Scenersville, about ? Aunt Elizabeth's will 1" u yw? t 44 Oh, I wouldn't Frank." 44-Why not |? /v j 44 It's such bitter cold weather to c travel in : and Aunt Elizabeth is such a whimsical old woman, it's ? as likely as not that shell change J her mind abont making a will 8 when yon get there. I wonld wait a little, if f were you." Mr. Cbickerly smiled. ] 44 That would be your system of doing things, Fanny, but not . minn." t M My system, Frank! What do 1 yon mean !* ? a 441 mean that yon believe In patting thing* off indefinitely, and , not always in the wisest manner. I wish you'd break yourself of thai habit, Fanny. Believe uie, it will 1 some day bring you to grief.** '* J Mrs. Chick or ly contracted bar a pretty eyebrows. 441 don*t believe in being leotnr- c ed, Frank." 0 14 And I don't very often lecture you, ray dear; pray give me cred- a it for that" v 44 You didn't think you were marrying an angel when you took I me, I hope !" b 44 No, iny love. I thought I was n marrying a very pretty little girl, whose few faults might easily be h corrected." a ': . " i:IENY" l. . ~m,>#? .'?* .' .* ? * . ? * , fiRER "Faults 1 Hare I any greal atflte, Frank!" . ' /? " Little faults . may sometimei in tail great consequences, Fanny.* *Hf you scold any more, I shall jo out of the room. *' Yon need not, for I am goinj oyBelf to pack my raliae. By the ray, theroVa button off the shirl want to wear, to-morrow. I wish rou would come upstairs and sew t on for uie." 41 will, presently.' 1 Why can't yon ooroe now !* 41 just want to finish this book here's only one more chapter.4 And Fanny opened her Yolunu o resolutely' that her busbanc bought it beet not to contest tlx piestion. Rittillff all al/snft in Amnt !.* IP ?- ? 1?VU? ? "? >right firo, Mrs. Chickerly gradu illy grew drowsy, and before she cnew it she had drifted off into the hadowy regions of dream-land. She was ronecd by the clod itriking eleven. 4 Dear mo 1 how late it isi' she hough t, with a little start. 41 must ro up stairs immediately. There . forgot to tell cook about having jrcakfhst at five to-morrow mom ng, and of course she's abed au< tsfeep by this time* I'll be up ear y enough to see to it myself, tha vi 11 bo just aa well.' And laying this salvo to her con ciencc, Mrs. Chickerly turned of he gas, and crept drowsily up the fairs. 4 Fanny, Fanny, it's past five wd cook hasn't come down stain ot. Arc you euro you spoko tc ler last night I' Mrs. Chickerly rubbed hor eye* ind stared sleepily around. 4 Ok, Frank, I forget all aboul poaking to her last night,' sh< tried with conscience-stricken face But I'll run right up?sue cat lave the breakfast reaay in a verj few minutes.' She sprang out of bed, thrust hoi feet into a pair of silk-lined slip >ers, and threw a shawl over hoi ilinnMnra Mr. Cbickerly bit hU lip, and shocked hor : lNo need, Fanny,' be said, * it tie bitterly, 4X mutt leave the ioubo in fifteen minutes, or mist he only through train. It's of nc isc speaking to cook now? 41 ain so sorry, Frank.' Mr. Ckickcrly did not auswer : le wna apparently absorbed in nrning over the various articles ir lis bureau drawer, while Fann^ at shivering on the edge of the >ed, cogitating how hard it wai or her husband to start on a long ournoy that bitter morning with >ut any breakfast. 41 can inakea cup of coffee my ielf over the furnace fire,' she ex ilaimed, springing to ber feet. Bu' IXr. Qhickcrly a^ain interposed: 4 Sit down, Fanny piease. ] vould rather yon would sew thfc >utton on tho neck of my shirt. ] iavo packed tho others?those thai iro fit to wear. I have shirti UlAnorVi lint nnt Ann in mna!. ' ? MM. MWW VUW ASA ftCpAll. Fanny crimsoned assho rcmcm >cred bow often in tbo course ol lie lost month or two, alio ha<3 .olcmnly promised herself to do rote a day to the much-needec cnovation of her husband's shirts Sho looked roand for ber tltim lie. * I left it down stairs lost night '11 get it in a minute!* The housemaid had jnst kindled i fire in the sitting-roora grate ; it rae blazing and crackling checri y among the fresh coals, and Fan la not resist the temptation Enng a moment to warm her fingers, and watch the ;rccnisb-purple spires of flame hoot merrily up the chimney, unit she heard her husband's* voice ailing hor imperatively: " Fanny I Fanny! what are you loing!' 44 Oh, dear," thought the wife, is she ran up stairs, *1 wish 'rank wouldn't be so cross. He's ilways in a hurry.' Little Mrs. Chickerly nevor stop >od to think that the real reason vas that she, his wife, was never in a hurry.' The needle tbroaded, the thim >io nucd on, an appropriate baton was next to be selected. * Ob. dear, Frank, I haven't oaf he rignt size !* Sow on what you bare, then; >nt be quick I' Jg But Fanny was nolle certain bare was * jast the right button,' omewhere in ber work-basket, nd stopped to search for it. There, I told yon aoT she Hod, triumphantly holding it ap a the point of ber needle. 4 Weft," tell, sew it on quick,' aid Mr. Obickerly,glancing at his rat oh nervously. ^ That's juat yoor worrying way, 'rank; aa it anybody could sew a utton on well in a hnrry. There I iy noedlo baa come unthroadod I' 4 Oh, Fanny. Fanny 1' sighed er husband, fairly out of patien^o t last,4 why didn't yon do it last - * - -* Am a# putt, auD t\)t Jmpi NV1LLE, SOUTH CAROLINA, t night, ae I begged of yon f I shall ansa the train; and 'what little i chance we had of a place in Axrat ' Elizabeth's will, will be sacrificed I to your miserable habit of being always behind-hand P ; Fanny gave him the shirt, and > began to whimper a little, bat Mr. t Cbickerly had neither the time ) nor the inclination to pause to " sootho her petulant manifestation of grief. He finished his dressing, caught op his valise with a hurriedly spoken 4 good-bye,' and ran ; down stairs, two steps at a. time, into the street. ... .. . > 1 There he goes,' murmured Fanl ny: 4 and he's gone away cross > with me, and all for nothing bnt a miserable button 1 I wish there > wasn't such a tbing as a button in the world P (A. wish which we ) much misdoubt, many another i wiffl than Mra Vonn? ^ ?>W Jk VUIVAQI 1^ baa echoed, with perbape better I reason.) Mrs. Chickorly was sitting down ? to her little dinner a la tciiiair*, t with a daintily browned chicken, , a tumbler of current jelly, and a ; enrly bunch ot celery ranged be fore her, when, to her surprise, the 1 door opened and in walked her lord and husband. t ' 4 Why, Frank, where on earth did yon come from V cried the as touished wife. f 4 From the office,' coolly answer) ed Mr. Ohickerly. * But I thought yon were off for , Scenersville, In such a hurrj.* \ 41 found myself jnst fire min> utes too late or the train, after bar. ing run all the way to tue depot.' i 4 Oh. that was too bad.' Ohickerly smiled a little as be I began to carve the chieken. > 4 Yes, I was a little annoyed at u first; it did' seem rather prorok-. i ing to be kept at home by ouly a r bntton.' 4 What are you going to do f' r 4 Why, I shall make a second - start to-morrow.' 4I'll sea to it that your breakfast is ready this time, to the soeond, 1 and all yonr wardrobe in trim,' said Fanny, rather relieved at the k prospect of a chance of retrieving > her character. i 4 You need not. I have engaged > a room at a hotel near tlie depot. I can't ran any more risks.' lie did not speak unkindly, and ; yet Fanny felt that he was deeply i displeased with her. i 4 But, Frank?' ' 4 We will not disease the matter > any further, my love, if you ploase. i I have resolved to aay nothing ; moro to you about reforms. I see - it is naeless, and it only tonus to foster an unpleasant state of feel ing between ns. Shall I help you - to some mnccaroni I' t And fairly silenced, Fanny ate her dinner with what appetite was ( left to her. ? Three days afterwards, Mr. [ Cbickerly once more made his ent trance, just at dnsk, carpet-bag in i hand, as Fanny sat enjoying the raddy shine of the coal-fire and the conscionsncss of having performr ed her duty in the mending and I general renovation of hor hns band's drawer-full of shirts?a job I which she had long been dreading . aud postponing. 4 Well, how is Aunt Elizabeth 1" questioned Fanny, whon her hus. band, duly wolcomod and greeted, had seated himself iu the opposite 1 easy-chair. t 4 Dead,' was the brief reply. 4 Dead f Oh, Frank! Or h6r old enemy, apoloxy I' i 4 Yes.' 1 W as ber will made 2' 1 4 It vu. Apparently she had > expected me, on the day she her* - solf appointed ; and on my non-ar> rival in the onlv train that stops, she sent for the village lawyer, made her will, and -left all her property to the orphan asylum in > Sccnorsvillo, w i t h a few bitter words to the effect that the neglect of her only living nephew bad indnccd her, on the spur of the moment, to alter her original.intention of leaving it to him. She died the very next morning.' 4 Oh, Frank, bow roach wee it!' 4 Ten thousand dpilars/ . There was s moment or two of silence, and then Mr. Cbickerly > added, composedly: ^ 44 Yon see, Fenny, bow much that missing button has oost me I' I Fanny Chickerly sat like one I condemned, by the ntteranM of her own conscience. Not alone the one missing button. bnt tbe the scores?nay hundreds?ol trifling omissions, for^eifulness, and postponements which made her life one endless endeavor to 'eatch np' with tho transpiring present, seemed to present themselves before her mind's eve. What wonld this end in! Was , not the present lesson sufficiently momentous to teach her to train herself in a different school f She rose, and oama to her husband's side, laying one tromnlons band on his shoulders. t run urn i'ir>_ - ma r n ~ *fim0 ? -" '- ~ 1 ' ?V?1MB coumifut of % 01 FEBRUARY 18, 1870. * There shall be no more missing j buttons, m V Inva ' alia aaU ? ? I estly, ^ ' He comprobended all that sho left unspoken, and silently pressed the little band in his own: and not a word was said more than this upon the subject. But it was not forgotten. Fanny Obickerly set herself to work to uproot the rank weeds growing In the garden of her life. And she succeeded, as we all may do when we resolve to do a wise thing.?New YorJc Ledger. Acts Passed by the Legislature of ,9ouUi Carolina. an act to pbkvknt and punish bribeby and ookeuption. Section 1. Beit enacted by the Senate and House of Representatives of the State of South Carolina, now met and sitting in General Assembly, and by the authority of the same: Whoever corruptly gives, offers, or pt onuses to any executive, legislative, or judicial officer, after his election or appointment. either before or after ne is qualified, or has taken his seat, any gift or gratuity whatover, with intent to influence bis act, vote, opinion, decision or judgment on anv matter- nneailnn <>?naa m proceeding which may be then pending, or may be pending, or may by law come or be brought before him in his official capacity, j shall be punished by imprisonment is the State Penitentiary at hard labor not exceeding fire years, or by fine not exceeding three thousand dollars, and imprisonment in jaU not exceeding one year. 8co. 8. Every execntive, legislative, or jndicnd officer who corruptly accepts a gift or gratuity, or a promise, to mime a gift, or to do an act beneficial to sncn officer under an agreement, or with an understanding that his vote, opinion or judgment shall be given in any particular manner, or on a particular side of any question, cause or proceeding wbicb is or may be by taw brought before bim in his official capacity, or that, in such capacity, ho shall make any particular nomination or appointment, shall forfeit his office, lie forever I disqualified to hold any public office, trust or appointment under the laws of this State, and be punished by imprisonment in tliectate Penitentiary at hard labor not exceeding ten years, or by fine not exceeding five thousand dollars, and by imprisonment in jail not I exceeding two years. Sec. 8. Whoever corrupts or attempts to corrupt any juror, arbitrator, umpire or referee,by giving, or offering promising any gift or gratuity whatever, with intent to bias tbe opinion or influence the decision of sncli juror, arbiter, umpire or referee iu relation to any cause or matter pending in tbe Oonrt, or before an inquest, or for the decision of which such arbiter, umpire or referee has been chosen or appointed, shall be punished by imprisonment in the State Peuiten tiary at hard labor not exceeding five years, or by fine not exceeding one thousand dollars, and imprisonment in jail not exceeding one year. Sec. 4. It any person snmmoned as a juror, or chosen or appointed as an arbitrator, umpire or referee, corruptly receives any gift or gratuity whatever from a party to ft suit, cause or proceeding, for the trial or decision of whieh snob ju ror has been summoned, or for the bearing or determination of which such arbitrator, umpire or referee has been chosen or appointed, ho shall be punished by imprisonment in the State Peuiten tiary at hard labor not exceeding five years, or by fine not exceeding one thousand dollars, and imprisonment in jail not exceoding one ycir. Seo. 5. Whoever conveys into a Jail, House of Correction, State Penitentiary, House of Reform aflAn A. 1SW? ?I?? * ?vh, v> wvuoi aiko piwv 01 confinement, any disguise, instrument, tool, weapon, or other thing adapted or oeefnl to aid a prisoner in making his eecap), with intent to iacilitate the escape of any prisoner there lawfully committed or detained, or by any means whatever aids or assists such prisoner in his endeavor to escape therefrom, whether such eeeape is effected or attempted or not; and whoever forcibly rescues any prisoner held in custody, upon any conviction or charge of an offence, shall be punished by imprisonment, in the State Penitentiary, at hard labor, not exceeding seven years; or, if the person wlioss escape or rescue ' was effected or intended was * charged with an offence not capi tal nor punishable by imprisonment, then by imprisonment in the . Slate Penitentiary, at hard labor, not exceeding two years, or by a fine not exceeding Ave hundred , dollars. Sao. 0. Whoever aids or assists r- ??' m i i M l .? i? - urn 'M.w mm, to WRl 1 V??. &*? % fy. *T*p j ^ ale tmb , ed bjr Imprisonment, in the State remtcntiary, at hard labor, not excceding two years, or by fine, not exceeding fire hundred dollars. " V hen potatoes are plant- u ed late in the season, it is essential ? to have the earliest varieties that w; can be procured. I have examined some planted this season that showed signs of sprouting, and found them growing finely, notwithstanding the exceeding hot cc and dry weather. at W. C. MoMLLAN. Marion, S. C., Jnly 13th, 1868. b< . h< Love of Country.?The Ethiopian imagines that God made his or sands and deserts, while angels only were employed in forming zl< the balance of tho world. ha A tribe in Asia believes that th the suu, moon and stars were made nc only for them, and that all the al parts ot the world are in darkness. Tho Maltese think their rocky nr island " the flower of the world," ^ while the Caribbean* believe that at they alone have a paradise, and a, themselves alone entitled to be W( called men. The Chinaman believes that his bones must go buck to China in "c order tomako his family happy in 8?: the spirit world. 8U The people of Norway are so at- AB tached to their country that they 08 have inscribed upon their coins: * Spirit, loyalty, valor, and what tic ever is honorable, let the world fri learn among the rocks of Norway." br ?. lig A Pretty Woman.?A pretty ~ woman is one of the institutions of the country, an angel in muslin and glory. She makes suns, the be blue sky, and happiness wherever tie she goes. Her path is one of delicious roses, perfume and beauty, tic She is a sweet poem, written in rare colors and choice sftk, and ot principles. Ken stand np before ner so many admiration points.? f0] Her words float around the ear g|, like mttsic, birds of paradise or the perfumes of the Sabbath bells. fu Without her, society would lose Bv, its truest attractions, the chnrch its firmest reliance, the young men the very best company. Her \n- tu flounce and generosity restrain tiie vicions, strengthen the faint heart- Jp ed. Wherever yon find virtuous sh woman, you also find fireside bo quote, clean clothes, order, good living, gontle hearts, music, and v< light, and modorn Institutions generally. 8he Is the flower of *kl humanity, and her inspirations is ar the breath of Heaven. be I \ t III ? ? liiiWT* *&&&?if*''\ gggggggggggItalnt ^roerts. I ' '"H i.., , = What ia that which is full of lee and yet hold water? A onge. What kind of a plant does a lack of a man " resemble f Kanaka. Tun latest title for Commodoro inderbilt is tho 44 Venerable Oomus of Roads." If a woman were to change her x, of what religion would ene be ? lie-then. Adaun a Path says she thinks husband's arms the best necklace woman can hare. A man in Cincinnati advertises r a situation : " Work not so ch an object aa good wages." A Business man may get along ithout advertising, and so can a agon without greasing?but it km hard. Thk melancholy days hare come hen overcoats mysteriously disjjjear from the rack in the front fir i. _ _ . - * * ?t jjkn yon near ? man mowing >out hia honeety, yon may safely ako up yonr mind that he haan t >t any. Elder Smith one of the Mormon ophots, has buried so many ivea that he deserves to be called Ider-bury Smith. Ah Aogusta man, after adverting for his lost watch and lookg for it all day, found it at night inging down his back. The organ-grinder has arrived ; Salt Lake City, and Brigham ay now expect to hear that prophic air " Up in a Balloon." Mark Twain says that tbo Sandich Islands dish of plain dog " is ily the cherished American sauge with the mystery removed." The sayintr that "there is more easnre in giving than in recervg," is supposed to apply chiefly " kicks, medicine, and advice." In a bookseller's catalogue lateappcared the following article : Memoirs of Charles the First? ith a head capitally executed.'* A bachelor seeing the words Families Supplied," over the >or of a shop, stepped in and said > would take a wife and two chil en. " IIavk you ever broken a >rse?" inquired a horse jockey. No, not exactly," replied Simons, l ? * uui x nave broken three or four agons." 44 I can marry any girl I please/' id a young fellow, boastingly. Very true, replied his waggish unpanion, 44 lor yon can't please iyLtttlr Frank, who fell out of td and didn't like to own it, said 5 cried bocause it was dark, and > couldn't tell whether 'twas him the pillow. Two Western editors are puz3d by the coincidence of their iving published the same joko on e same day in their respective .wspapers. No coincidence at I; they both stole the joke. 44 How fast they bnild houses >w 1" said II. 44 They began that hiding last week, and now they o putting in the lights." 44 Yes," lswered hia friend, 44 and next cok thoy will put in the livers." 44 Can yon steer the main mast iwn the forcastle stairs ?" said a a captain to a new hand. 44 Yes, -, I can, if yon will stand below d coil it up." Cap'n didn't techise that man any tnore. A man called another an oxtorln? * * FIIUI IUI BU mg mm, M Why, my end," replied t h o man who ought the suit, UI did it to ob;e you." " To oblige me, indeed how so t" 44 W by, to? blige you pay ma" Two well-dressed shoemakers ing in the oompany ot some genmen, were asked tlveir protct o. Says one ot tbem, 441 prace the heel ing art," "ana I," ys the other,44 labor for the good men's soles l" " \ At a recent railway festival the llowing striking sentiment waa von : 44 Oor Mothers?the only fhlth1 tenders who nover misplaced a ritch." Ik a small party, the subject ruing on matrimony, a lady said her sister, "I wonder, my dear, >u have never made a match ; I link you want the brimstone ?replied, "No, not tho brimone, only tho spark." A satiric poot underwent a su? >re drobbing, and was observed walk ovor afterwards with a ick. 44 Mr. P.ueaninds me,"sya wac. 44 of somoof the saints, who o always painted wifb tho tym* >hs ot thoir martyrdom.